September 9th, 2012

When Will Piers Morgan Learn?

Ouch…


44 Comments

  1. 1
    Aunty Matter says:

    Piers is a dick.

  2. 2
    A man says:

    I have followed up every spam message I have been sent advertising penis enlargement. My penis is now 47 ft 10 in long, and I need to carry it in a wheelbarrow. What should I do now?

    • 4
      John Major says:

      Get a job with CNN and drag the ratings in a southerly direction

    • 9
      I CAN'T SQUEAK FOR ANYONE ELSE BUT CAMERONS TOAST says:

      It’s funny that cause i’ve never had a single one
      maybe they know i’m fully endowed

      • 36
        John Prescott says:

        I think that it’s disgusting that sites like this advertise penis enlargement…and mature dating…and Thai brides.

  3. 7
    Uncommon Knowledge says:

    • 14
      Jimmy says:

      There’s something about a rightie (let’s call it) “think” tank being named after a vacuum cleaner that just feels so right.

      • 17
        smoggie says:

        That would be because they’re forever having to think up new ways of clearing up the shit left by outgoing leftie governments.

      • 18
        JH says:

        Oh, up pops Jimmy.

        It wouldn’t be because Paul Ryan scares the shit out of lefties, would it?

        Charismatic, lucid right winger as he is?

        Knowing fucking well that is all it takes to counter lefty bullshit, and they have nothing – NOTHING – to counter with except histrionic accusations of evil?

        • 43
          Jimmy says:

          He does look a bit scary. The phrase “prohibited degrees” springs to mind for some reason.

        • 44
          MacGuffin says:

          Paul Ryan, particularly his vice-presidential candidacy, is LOVED by lefties. It is one more nail in the coffin for Republican chances in November.

  4. 10
    The Incredible String Vest says:

    Piers Morgan even the fucking name screams posh boy privillaged nepotistic c unt jesus christ wake up FFS!

    • 37
      Fish says:

      Yeah…and he knows a good stock market punt when he sees one. Never did know why he wasn’t asked to account, before a judge, for his share dealing.

  5. 11
  6. 12
    A Different "Guy," Though says:

    A tribute to the career of Piers Morgan on television:

  7. 13
  8. 16
    Y Knott says:

    So will we see Seb Coe hacking off his legs and claiming bennies to further inspire a generation ?
    Thought not.
    Been trying to think who he reminds me of – reckon it must be Lonnie :
    http://i46.tinypic.com/11ht5oi.jpg

    • 19

      Lovely tribute to Lonnie Donegan from Mark Knopfler:

      What was not generally known was that Donegan was a fine thinker as well: In England, we were separated from our folk music tradition centuries ago and were imbued with the idea that music was for the upper classes. You had to be very clever to play music. When I came along with the old three chords, people began to think that if I could do it, so could they. It was the reintroduction of the folk music bridge which did that. Newcastle Journal

      • 28
        Y Knott says:

        Enjoyed his music back in my childhood. At least he didn’t try to tell me what to think.

        • 29

          The first record I ever bought was the single My old man’s a dustman. It was an ex-jukebox disk and thus had the centre circle missing. Cost me two week’s pocket money from the local junk shop.

          He inspired the whole sixties revolution, including the Beatles and the Stones, but ironically was pushed aside by it all into near oblivion. He was still touring when he died.

          The generosity of spirit in Knopfler paying this tribute is heart warming as his career eclipsed Donegan’s so completely. It shows just how grounded Mark is.

  9. 20
    @ontablets says:

    The biggest problem that Piers Morgan has is that he is a fanatic supporter of Arsenal Football Club.

    The twitter spats between Lord Sugar and himself are bloody hilarious.

    Rant over,I’m going back to sleep.

    • 41
      Ivor Tapeworm says:

      The biggest problem that Piers Morgan has is that he is a[strike]fa[/strike]n[strike]atic supporter of[/strike] Arse[strike]nal Football Club.[/strike]

  10. 21
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Clint Eastwood’s autobiography is simply titled ‘Clint’

    If you squint, that could be the title of Piers Morgan’s.

  11. 26
    a real person says:

    Who the fuck is Rihanna?

  12. 27
    Gordon Brown says:

    This morning I will do the same as I do every morning

    I will look at the world and aim to increase poverty

  13. 39
    Lizzie says:

    Why would Rihanna be concerned about whether or not Morgan has a dick … what’s she hoping he’ll do with it? And why is she so impatient about it?

  14. 42
    Riggsy Brown says:

    As stated above, Donegan was a fine thinker and had an encyclopaedic knowledge of music. Knew the lyrics and chords of every folk/blues song from Leadbelly & Jimmie Rodgers (and their contemporaries) right up to, and including, musicians working at the time of his death. He was also well versed in politics, world affairs and the arts and could speak authoritatively on many subjects.

    Had the good fortune to know him and even jammed with him a couple of times. In his latter days his health was deteriorating and he became understandably edgy and difficult to be around. Until, that is, he took to the stage when he’d invariably deliver a stunning performance. But it exacted a huge toll on him. He died ten years ago (2002) during a UK tour. Lonnie would have loved that Mark Knopfler tribute!


Media Reader

Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Mirror’s Lazy Lie | Guardian
Mirror’s Weeping Child Picture Lying Lazy Journalism | Guardian
Coulson: Everything You Need to Know in 6 Seconds | MediaGuido
BBC Still Loves the Guardian | Breitbart
Establishment Times Chums Appeasing Tory Europhiles | UKIP
Andrew Pierce v Owen Jones | MediaGuido
Michael Rosen’s Expert Opinions | MediaGuido
Metro Editor Leaves | Buzzfeed
Local News Stories That Rocked The World | Poke


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Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”



orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?


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