September 9th, 2012

When Will Piers Morgan Learn?


  1. 1
    Aunty Matter says:

    Piers is a dick.

  2. 2
    A man says:

    I have followed up every spam message I have been sent advertising penis enlargement. My penis is now 47 ft 10 in long, and I need to carry it in a wheelbarrow. What should I do now?

  3. 3
    Marr Barred from Home says:

    Andrew Marr is in the doghouse tonight.

    After his BBC show, he returned home to Richmond, west London, but left in a taxi half hour later clutching a small suitcase.
    His wife did not speak to reporters as she left the house with a female friend soon after.

  4. 4
    John Major says:

    Get a job with CNN and drag the ratings in a southerly direction

  5. 5
    Aunty Matter says:

    He’ll be OK, One of the two Ed’s will look after him or the mad one eyed queen from Fife.

    After all, Marr has sucked so much Labour cock all these years they owe him one.

  6. 6
    The Drugs don't work says:

    I think you will find that he is not on Sarah’s Christmas card list but no doubt that Cherie still sends him one.

  7. 7
    Uncommon Knowledge says:

  8. 8

    I notice Marr was going for the “rusty sheriffs badge rather than the “fish mitten”

  9. 9

    It’s funny that cause i’ve never had a single one
    maybe they know i’m fully endowed

  10. 10
    The Incredible String Vest says:

    Piers Morgan even the fucking name screams posh boy privillaged nepotistic c unt jesus christ wake up FFS!

  11. 11
  12. 12
    A Different "Guy," Though says:

    A tribute to the career of Piers Morgan on television:

  13. 13
  14. 14
    Jimmy says:

    There’s something about a rightie (let’s call it) “think” tank being named after a vacuum cleaner that just feels so right.

  15. 15
    Kebab Time says:

    why does they do it.

    i does not understand

  16. 16
    Y Knott says:

    So will we see Seb Coe hacking off his legs and claiming bennies to further inspire a generation ?
    Thought not.
    Been trying to think who he reminds me of – reckon it must be Lonnie :

  17. 17
    smoggie says:

    That would be because they’re forever having to think up new ways of clearing up the shit left by outgoing leftie governments.

  18. 18
    JH says:

    Oh, up pops Jimmy.

    It wouldn’t be because Paul Ryan scares the shit out of lefties, would it?

    Charismatic, lucid right winger as he is?

    Knowing fucking well that is all it takes to counter lefty bullshit, and they have nothing – NOTHING – to counter with except histrionic accusations of evil?

  19. 19

    Lovely tribute to Lonnie Donegan from Mark Knopfler:

    What was not generally known was that Donegan was a fine thinker as well: In England, we were separated from our folk music tradition centuries ago and were imbued with the idea that music was for the upper classes. You had to be very clever to play music. When I came along with the old three chords, people began to think that if I could do it, so could they. It was the reintroduction of the folk music bridge which did that. Newcastle Journal

  20. 20
    @ontablets says:

    The biggest problem that Piers Morgan has is that he is a fanatic supporter of Arsenal Football Club.

    The twitter spats between Lord Sugar and himself are bloody hilarious.

    Rant over,I’m going back to sleep.

  21. 21
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Clint Eastwood’s autobiography is simply titled ‘Clint’

    If you squint, that could be the title of Piers Morgan’s.

  22. 22
    EffOff says:

    No sympathy for either of them really. She should reduce the size of her Clitoris.

  23. 23

    Are there lessons that can be drawn from this for the title of Umunna’s biography?

  24. 24
    Anonymous says:

    His wife is obviously not giving him any, and who can blame her, the ugly tripehound?

  25. 25
    Anonymous says:

    Good one smoggs.

  26. 26
    a real person says:

    Who the fuck is Rihanna?

  27. 27
    Gordon Brown says:

    This morning I will do the same as I do every morning

    I will look at the world and aim to increase poverty

  28. 28
    Y Knott says:

    Enjoyed his music back in my childhood. At least he didn’t try to tell me what to think.

  29. 29

    The first record I ever bought was the single My old man’s a dustman. It was an ex-jukebox disk and thus had the centre circle missing. Cost me two week’s pocket money from the local junk shop.

    He inspired the whole sixties revolution, including the Beatles and the Stones, but ironically was pushed aside by it all into near oblivion. He was still touring when he died.

    The generosity of spirit in Knopfler paying this tribute is heart warming as his career eclipsed Donegan’s so completely. It shows just how grounded Mark is.

  30. 30
    :o) says:

    Andrew Marr-mite

  31. 31
    ho hum says:

    A great loss to the music scene. I saw him with the Chris Barber band at Wimbledon Town hall way back in about 1961 (ish). He sang some great duets with Ottilie Patterson too.

  32. 32
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Mark’s playing Lucca next July, you should head over.

  33. 33
    ho hum says:

    I bet next year’s salary that more people buy Clint’s book that Chuckup’s.

  34. 34
    ho hum says:

    You mean you will stop buying the Graudian?

  35. 35
    no such client says:

    not just folk music, Europeans do seem to have a lot more folk traditions than we do, probably they got lost with the industrial revolution.

  36. 36
    John Prescott says:

    I think that it’s disgusting that sites like this advertise penis enlargement…and mature dating…and Thai brides.

  37. 37
    Fish says:

    Yeah…and he knows a good stock market punt when he sees one. Never did know why he wasn’t asked to account, before a judge, for his share dealing.

  38. 38
  39. 39
    Lizzie says:

    Why would Rihanna be concerned about whether or not Morgan has a dick … what’s she hoping he’ll do with it? And why is she so impatient about it?

  40. 40
  41. 41
    Ivor Tapeworm says:

    The biggest problem that Piers Morgan has is that he is a[strike]fa[/strike]n[strike]atic supporter of[/strike] Arse[strike]nal Football Club.[/strike]

  42. 42
    Riggsy Brown says:

    As stated above, Donegan was a fine thinker and had an encyclopaedic knowledge of music. Knew the lyrics and chords of every folk/blues song from Leadbelly & Jimmie Rodgers (and their contemporaries) right up to, and including, musicians working at the time of his death. He was also well versed in politics, world affairs and the arts and could speak authoritatively on many subjects.

    Had the good fortune to know him and even jammed with him a couple of times. In his latter days his health was deteriorating and he became understandably edgy and difficult to be around. Until, that is, he took to the stage when he’d invariably deliver a stunning performance. But it exacted a huge toll on him. He died ten years ago (2002) during a UK tour. Lonnie would have loved that Mark Knopfler tribute!

  43. 43
    Jimmy says:

    He does look a bit scary. The phrase “prohibited degrees” springs to mind for some reason.

  44. 44
    MacGuffin says:

    Paul Ryan, particularly his vice-presidential candidacy, is LOVED by lefties. It is one more nail in the coffin for Republican chances in November.

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