August 29th, 2012

Mandy’s Harry Rant
Claims Guardian Will Never Make Money Again

The Prince of Darkness has today slammed the lack of Internet regulation which allowed Guido and others to publish the naked photos of Prince Harry last week. Moody Mandy also bemoaned the Guardian‘s future profit prospects:

“The bigger question is how the domestic media market can be made economic and subject to any form of regulation in an era when, a click away, there is access to information that respects no national boundaries and the laws of no single national parliament or the basic standards of conventional journalism. It is hard to see how some of the best-known sources of quality English-language journalism – the Times, New York Times, the Guardian spring to mind – will ever make money again. We come to grips with the fact that the internet is giving public access to uncorroborated, undigested and unmediated news, all in the name of free speech, is becoming one of the defining issues of the 21st century.”

How beastly that the establishment cannot censor and control what is news anymore.

Mandy can pluck Guido’s keyboard from his cold dead hands.


  1. 1
    El Presidente says:

    I once met that Mandy…..he was going up a back passage


    • 14
      Oh Mandy says:

      This is the man who called the Sun C unts for not backing Gordon


    • 15
      Another slimeball says:

      I once met Mandy. When he was leaving me exhausted, he said, ‘You must come again’.


    • 18
      Only the assumptions which lie behind his reasoning would have to include..... says:

      Is Mandy actually saying that everything reported in the papers is true ?


      • 22
        Circular arguments for every occassion says:

        Yes, everything reported in the press is and always has been absolutely true and everything reported online is probably false and anyway those reading it are unable to discern what is true and what is false cause they are too stupid and this can be evidenced from the fact that they think everything they read in the press is and always has been absolutely true and….errr


      • 55
        Assumptions R Us says:

        Only if they lick the arse of Noo£ieBore


    • 23
      Grrr says:


      The reason the Groniad and NYT loose money is because people are too clever to read the Marxist dribble they put out.

      The Mail and NY Post are making tons of money.

      Elitist wanker – belongs back in the EU.


      • 32
        V1le Labour ruined my Country says:

        No we don’t want him back milking the EU gravy train.


        • 34
          Grrr says:

          Where else would thousands of useless, Champaign Socialists go – if not the EU, UN, BBC, NGOs.

          Just imagine if these were closed down – thousands of them hanging around health food shops, begging and handing out the Socialist Worker – augh!


        • 56
          Assumptions R Us says:

          Has he ever stopped? – no, really stopped?


      • 47
        Mrs Smith says:

        He belongs in prison.


      • 61
        HenryV says:

        I must protest about being too clever to Marxist dribble. The Guardian was always sold out by 930 at the newsagents on campus. You can be too clever and still want to read Marxist dribble.


        • 95
          Lord Stansted says:

          Yes, but how many copies did the shop stock? 3?


          • Grrr says:

            Socialist Worker – now there’s an oxymoron.


            Don’t you love how BBC/Groniad people always talk about ‘Quality media’.

            As if anyone who doesn’t work in a State sponsored Socialist racket isnt’ capable of making something good.

            I do beleive that nice Mr Stalin had similar views.


          • HenryV says:

            That is too big a number for me to understand sorry.

            Another interesting titbit is that I didn’t know Ocado delivered in my area until I saw their van driving around. Bored between lectures I followed it one day and it made 9 deliveries to the lecturers’ houses on campus. Socialism, it pays.


    • 37
      Ron Davies says:

      I met him coming out of the public toilets on Hampstead Heath. He must have passed a mighty stool because he had a very satisfied look on his face.


      • 87
        south7eventh says:

        I knew you Ron. Down in Portsmouth long before your Clapham Common heyday. You were always sour faced and miserable and now I know why. No satisfaction as the Rolling Stones sang at the time. Nothing at all to with the fact that I used to beat you soundly…….at bar billiards.


    • 60
      AC1 says:

      Sounds more like he’s admitting that the establishments legacy media are all rent-seekers who’s income can only be preserved by blocking competitors.


    • 110
      Anonymous says:

      Did he have a ring of confidence?


  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Prince of Wankers, more like


    • 27
      To be fair says:

      To be fair you have to remember that this mans entire reason d’etre has been to ensure that everyone stays on message so obviously the internet is a big scary place for him. Have some sympathy please.


      • 31

        Has he thought of doing PR work for Tom Cruise and John Travolta? (Travolta allegedly likes to be “on massage”)

        Just the sort of “What is truth, what is a lie” stuff he excels at.

        Another candidate for the Hare Test, and long term storage in Broadmoor.


      • 39
        Billy Bunter says:

        It’s very funny seeing the mainstream broadcasters and publishers watch in dismay as the little guy beats them to it. The days of “You will sit down at 6pm while the BBC tells you what to think” are over, and thank God for that.


        • 118
          Grrr says:

          Many Ceausescu – not easy when the peasantry decide they aren’t going to have you bossing them around any more.

          Piano wire anyone?


      • 65
        Lord Manglesome says:

        How on earth can I protect myself and my fellow travellers from the truth if any amateur snooper can film it and put it on YouTube and text it on Twitter?
        We need rigorous regulation to control the people, and the formation of a Twit Police unit with teeth. Up the Red Flag.
        Note to myself: Will speak to new DG of the BBC on this issue and get him to support this important control measure.


  3. 3
    Pollytwaddle says:

    “the Guardian spring to mind – will ever make money again.”

    What about my job? What about my £150K/pa? Who will complain about vicious Eeevil Toreee (™) cuts?



    • 9
      BBC Spokes person,thing...whatever says:

      You will always have a job with us.


      • 24
        Pickled Wizard says:

        ‘We come to grips with the fact that the internet is giving public access to uncorroborated, undigested and unmediated news, all in the name of free speech,’

        just like the B B C does, if anyone heard the crazed bird from the gun control network on WATO – even the token plod interviewed effectively called her a liar


        • 63
          AC1 says:

          I’ll tell you a secret….
          Gun control only takes weapons from law abiding people. i.e. Criminals have them and you don’t. It is handy if you’re a state that wants to make sure you can’t be ruled by the people.


          • Pundit Too says:

            Isn’t it strange that the really loony left people invited on BBC happen to be mainly women. Gun control today followed by women in the boardroom, both extreme though to be fair the women in boardroom person was on a mission and did have some balance.
            The man opposing her stated that company performance fell when women were put in boardrooms in Scandinavia etc. BBC News at One were dumbfounded and asked how this could be.
            Common sense if you are forced to promote a woman to keep within legislation over better qualified males. They leave or underperform while looking for a new job and efficiency suffers.
            Bring Back Communism is in a bubble world of its own (together with Westminster and the Unions)


        • 126
          Backwoodsman says:

          The ‘gun control network’ = sid & doris bonkers . bbc love ‘em .
          Strangely they rarely find the numbers for BASC or the Countryside Alliance , the representitives for the half a million lawfully licensed sporting and target shooters in the UK.


    • 64
      Norman Stanley Fletcher says:

      Oh, Great High Priestess of Hypocrisy, your job and undeserved salary and perks will be safe. However much money that bigoted rag loses, it will always have state bailouts thrown at it, so it will always keep on publishing shite that nobody will actually buy with their own money.


  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    aha, i see what you did there. you are clever!


  5. 5
    Belinda (Age 8) says:

    My Granny goes on about some bloke called Mandleson. Was he someone important in the olden days?


  6. 6
    Loungelizard says:

    This is exactly what people like Mandy fear. If he can’t control or manipulate a platform for comment then it will act as a watchdog over his actions.


    • 51
      Tom Watson MP says:

      He has a point there; some of the Media in this country can’t be trusted to report things accurately. This is why I attempt to control what is said and written about Labour candidates, by attempting to co-opt bloggers and buzz-creator types who write about such things; it’s the best way to insure that Labour’s message, as delivered by the candidates, is quoted accurately and fairly. There’s far too much rumourmongering and innuendo on the Internet, by people claiming to be watchdogs (but who are in reality attack dogs), and it only serves to embolden the papers to run with stories, by using the fig-leaf of “It’s been reported…”, by some bloke on a scurrilous website, no doubt! See here: If there’s any rumourmongering and innuendo on the Internet to be done, leave it in the hands of a responsible individual– me.


      • 66
        Norman Stanley Fletcher says:

        I wouldn’t trust any mainstream media anywhere to report anything accurately or impartially.


  7. 7
    Call a spade a spade says:

    ‘quality’ in other words,left wing.


  8. 8
    JH says:

    Jeesus fucking Christ. My piss did not just boil so much as spontaneously vapourise.

    “We come to grips with the fact that the internet is giving public access to uncorroborated, undigested and unmediated news, all in the name of free speech, is becoming one of the defining issues of the 21st century.”

    He says that as if it’s a bad thing. We all know what he means by ‘digesting’ and ‘mediating’ ie making sure everything printed or said fits in to that tiny spectrum of metropolitan elite left wing opinion the Guardian et al regard as ‘acceptable’, and screaming that everything else is racist/bigoted/xenophobic/tory scum etc.

    Why is it so hard for these left wing edifices of vanity to make money, Peter? Is that a tacit admission that barely anyone is actually willing to pay to have distilled sanctimony pumped into their eyes and ears?

    Fuck them, fuck them all. Welcome to the future you pitiful, self-righteous little bastards, your finances are about to be as bankrupt as your principles.


  9. 10
    Forkbender says:

    Maybe the disaster when the Argentine air force bombed that destroyer and caused such chaos and loss of life would have been known about much earlier


  10. 11
    UlyssesReturns says:

    Are you telling us that Lord Peter Mandelson was looking at pictures of naked boys on the internet? Has Scotland Yard been informed? Has Lord Leveson ruled on this?


  11. 13
    Alf Garnett says:

    He should stick to Oligarchs, Brazilians and his Beloved, Bountiful Bloody Common Market.


  12. 16

    Plane has been hijacked at a Dutch airport.


    • 42
      Selohesra says:

      Apparantly a miscommunication! – I’m not great at languages but how do you confuse ‘everything is fine’ with ‘armed attackers have taken us hostage’


      • 48
        jgm2 says:

        There was an earlier report that parts of Schipol had been evacuated because they’d discovered a WWII bomb.

        I can see how the pilot, asking questions along the lines of ‘What do I do about this bomb when I get to Schipol….’ might get out of hand very quickly.


        • 73
          Ambulance chasing BBC says:

          We were on this like a dog on a bone – unfortunately a false alarm.
          We only report on real news and not news like the riots and killings in India, and factory workers going berserk and killing management, also in India.


  13. 17
    Slippery Slope says:


    ‘Isn’t it appalling that people are allowed to find out what lying, troughing hypocrites we politicians really are. Can’t we just censor the internet like they do in China?’


  14. 19
    There was a crooked man says:

    I guess he does not like the press reporting his dodgy mortgages, dodgy passports and dodgy Oligarch friends.


  15. 20
    Johnny Norfolk says:

    Its a bit like when the light bulb did away with gas lights. Time moves on.


    • 29
      Caroline Lucas says:

      Lightbulbs cause cancer,poverty, inequality, rich people, global melting/cooling/freezing/boiling {delete depending on current weather forecasts} and right wingers.


      • 67
        HenryV says:

        What about Halal light bulbs?


        • 69
          AC1 says:

          Electricity is halal. Only modern thing allowed in iSlam is the AK74.


          • Sniper mission says:

            74 is not popular except with the Russians. China make the 56 (47M) which is far more popular. They were given a 74 to test by the British but apparently did not like it.
            Russia has only made about 20% of the AK’s in operation worldwide.


    • 68
      AC1 says:

      You’ll notice combined heat and light-bulbs are banned, and dangerous mercury containing “efficient”* bulbs are not (coincidentally made by a cartel of businesses).

      *Only when the heating’s off.


  16. 21
    The Prince Of Darkness says:

    I think it’s high time I applied for a few more mortgages.

    Nice to take a trip down memory lane.


  17. 26
    What is he receiving from the tax payer says:

    The national Papers wont do it ,so to piss Mandelson off totally , can you use Freedom of Information requests to find out what pension he receives for his few years working for the European Commission, what tax is paid on this, what pension he receives as a former MP, and Cabinet Office holder, and what allowances he now receives from the House of Lords. In other words, what money is he taking from us the tax payers, as a reward for helping to wreck the economy, whilst brown tongue ing Blair and Brown, and what tax does he pay on this.Can you also remind us please how much he paid for his current house.Thank you GF, the last hope of an accountable UK.


  18. 30
    Is it any wonder ? says:

    I see the Telegraph is reporting ( So remember if its in the papers it must be true) that Britons are drunk in 75% of their facebook pictures. What surprises me is that the number is not nearer 100% what with living in this economic EUSSR controlled shit hole of an existence.


  19. 35
    JH says:

    Why is it so hard for these left wing edifices of vanity to make money, Mandy?

    Is that a tacit admission that barely anyone is actually willing to pay to have distilled sanctimony pumped into their eyes and ears?


    • 72
      Old Tory Bigot says:

      That’s the thing that baffles the sactimnious, middle-class left the most. The sort of people that read and write and own the Guardian.

      They are SO wonderful, SO caring and compassionate, SO fair – how could ‘ordinary people’ not be supportive and get on board?

      In their eyes, the Guardian would be the biggest selling newpaper by miles. The just can’ fathom it.


      • 74
        jgm2 says:

        Indeed. Yet the BBC, the TV wing of the Guardian is so universally popular and awash with cash. It must do their head in.

        The fact that the BBC is only ‘popular’ because of enforced subscription and 80 years of inertia and self-aggrandizing propaganda doesn’t entire their teeny little minds.

        The c*unts at the Guardian would like nothing better than a compulsory newspaper tax to be levied and handed to them at the Guardian. Other people would be free to publish their own newspapers of course but if anybody read them they’d have to buy a Guardian subscription too. And that should be the law. Then it would all be fair.


        • 79
          Pundit too too says:

          Have you noticed how the BBC promote the Guardian subliminally?
          Even in the Last Word broadcast on BBC Radio 4 (of which many of the dead they choose they state have left wing or socialist tendencies) they had several “witnesses” mention that the dead person read the Guardian.


          • Old Tory Bigot says:

            Nothing submiminal about it old chap.

            Whenever the BBC ‘looks at the papers’ the Guarduan is nearly always first up, and if it isn’t the Independent is. Someone once said it should be in order of circulation – Daily Mail first / Gran last – now that would cause their heads to implode.

            Also the BBC aid the Graun financially by a) buying loads of copies and b) by advertising posts pretty exclusively there (all good meeja types read the Guardian, don’t you know).

            Namby pamby pinko bastards all of them.


  20. 38
    Tom Watson MP says:

    A source close to Mandy alleged that he printed out those pics of Harry, laminated them and then knocked one out over them – all at taxpayers expense!


  21. 40
    ++++BREAKING NEWS+++++ says:

    Athletes up and down the country are expressing outrage at the proposed Government cap on the Honours system which could see many athletes who would had they competed in previous games have been awarded an OBE but now simply due to an accident of birth and suspected government pressure will only receive a commemorative certificate signed by Lord Coe and Clare Balding.

    One athlete who did not wish to be named said ” If I had taken these events what I won in 2000 at the Sydney games then I would be a dead cert for a Knighthood now its just likely to be a poxy MBE. Its sooooo not fair”

    Labour Leader Mr Ed Millibandwagon has demanded a judge led enquiry into this whole affair.


  22. 45

    Well said Guido.

    Mandy like all his buddies in parliament need a big dose of reality then they might not make such stupid comments or decisions


    • 86
      Peter Grimes says:

      Lady Mandleslimes’ comments aren’t stupid. They just show her exasperation that never again will she and her favourite ZaNuLieBor mates like Loony Al Campbell be able to lie to and hoodwink the public as comprehensively as they did 1997-2010.


  23. 49
    Mandy says:

    whatever you all say or think, I’m totally relaxed about getting filthy. (And rich)


  24. 52
    Upchuck Heston says:


  25. 53
    Lord Man at Trough of Pension in the Bag says:

    “the establishment cannot censor and control what is news anymore.”



  26. 59
    Lord Snooty says:

    Ugh, filthy little common people having free access to information – whatever next?


  27. 75
    Daviejohn says:

    Found a left (no pun intended) copy of the Guardian in a coffee shop the other day, after glancing at it you can see why it was left and why it will never make a profit. Full of nasty whinging socialists.


    • 100
      JH says:

      I’d describe it as a self-satisfied smugsheet written by and for public sector wankers who mistake their ability to piss other people’s money up the wall to dubious positive effect with concepts like ‘talent’ and ‘merit’.


  28. 76
    Anonymous says:

    He didn’t mention the Daily Telegraph. Wonder why?


  29. 80
    Timmy Tin Foil says:

    The Leveson Report due out in October, according to the Hollywood Reporter (in “Seen Elsewhere”); why the rush? Well, it’s just in time for Eric Holder, Obama’s head of the Justice Department, to file Foreign Corrupt Practices Act charges against Rupert Murdoch, in an attempt to make any coverage critical of Obama by FOX News leading into the election look like a vindinctive hate-piece, and should Mitt Romney win and his Attorney General nominee call off the spurious investigation, make it look as if a favour is being repaid. In the event Obama wins, the investigation will continue, of course, and will be a barely-disguised attempt on the Administration’s part to muzzle FOX News.


    • 84
      Thousand Gun Holder. says:

      I also did this to take the heat from myself over providing thousands of guns to Mexican drug gangs in a scheme that went slightly wrong.


  30. 81
    Kinnochio says:

    Have some more “advocado mousse” Peter


  31. 85
    Mad Frankie's Older Sister says:

    I imagine Mandy is shocked by anything not making money


    • 97
      ed martin says:

      is it his own sources of press income that worry him?

      this reads like a touching plea for lolly, .. and written by which sub-editor?


  32. 88
    Joazinhio says:

    “It is hard to see how some of the best-known sources of quality English-language journalism – the Times, New York Times, the Guardian” is Mandy aving a laugh???????????? Times, NW Times and Guardian are a bunch of lying 2 faced left wing gutter trash bastards,,dedicated to feathering the nests of their buddy left wing thieving public sector bastards at the expense of the rest of us. Just like Mandy, Bliar, absent Jonah Brown, Compo Cameron, Cleggie and the rest.
    Time to fire up the SVUs with the machine guns (like the Libyans) and shoot the whole fucking lot of them.


  33. 89
    Owd Grumpy says:

    Word that dont go together

    Quality \English/ Language/ Newspaper and The Guardian !!

    As usual he has lost the Plot if he ever had a grip of it


  34. 90
    Bertie Bassett says:

    Well Mandy, when was the last time you were in your local pub.
    You used to get comment for free there, and all sorts of info and news too..

    Maybe you need to regulate all of that.

    T’internet is just the street or the pub, writ large mate.


    • 109
      JH says:

      T’internet is just the street or the pub, writ large mate.

      Guardian editorial meeting reaction to that concept:

      The internet must reflect chatter at North London dinner parties! It must reflect the left wing attitudes of education and media elites! All else must be stamped out, and labelled as bigotry!


  35. 93
    himindoors says:

    Reminds me of an interview with a woman from a traditional publishers I heard a few years back. She kept banging on about internet / kindle / ebooks as “disruptive technologies”. When the interviewer quite rightly put it to her that the only disruption was to their own control of the marketplace, she simply couldn’t grasp that it could work in any other way.


  36. 98
    Sick of the lot of them says:

    Frankly, Mandy is just plain wrong. Over the last decade the circulation of all print newspapers has declined to slightly more than half of their peak figures – but The Daily Telegraph today still sells more copies than the Guardian did at its peak in the mid ’90s.
    Maybe that’s the real problem for Mandelson, the fact that it is the lefty papers that are suffering by far the most, as people turn away from them.
    Blogs are actually a good source of news, and very few of them lie or make it up. Those that do lose their readership pretty quickly.


  37. 103
    the savant says:

    he s obviously ruing his decision to send fabulous fabio back to the sao paulo favela .

    absence makes the ” heart” … etc etc


  38. 104
    JH says:

    The Naurgiad is haemorrhaging money, and would be out of business overnight without the (horrid, capitalist) Auto Trader cash cow to keep it pretending that everything is fine.

    It amuses me that they have pissed away so much other-peoples-cash trying to spread their sanctimony the internet, but are now being forced to revert to doing that horrid capitalist making-money-thing and focus on print.

    The printed Guardian. That barely anyone wants to pay to read.

    I’ll bet there are less than 100’000 people in this country who would willingly buy the Guardian with their own money on a regular basis.

    When I was young and stupid I used to buy a copy when I went on the train, so I could look like an oh-so-cultured smart arse c’unt and maybe pull a bird. I doubt that helped their already declining sales much.


  39. 106
    The Dandy says:

    “that respects no national boundaries and the laws of no single national parliament”

    Errrrrrr, The European Union………………………


  40. 107
    the savant says:

    i ” had ” that prince of darkness fellah in the back of my cab .

    not once ….


  41. 108
    Anonymous says:

    “Unmediated.” Is Mandy implying that the news should be vetted or censored before it is passed fit for our consumption?

    Last week we had a feminist burning books. This week we’ve got a socialist wanting to censor the flow of news.

    So having abdicated any role they might have once had in protecting and promoting the rights of ordinary working people, the Left are, instead, accessing their inner fuhrer.



  42. 111
    Hackney Cabbie says:

    Why should they make money? you posh socialist twat. One of those adjectives is a typo


  43. 112
    One Day He's Going To Get Caught Out and Not Do His Slippery Toad Houdini Trick says:

    Oh, if only those photos of the perverse one in action could have been captured in Marrakesh!


  44. 113
    Visual Gag Reflex says:

    I find it very very hard to look at that man an not want to vomit.


  45. 119
    welshwiz says:

    He really does live on another parallel universe doesn’t he? This crumbling of the old ways of doing things cannot be anything other than a force for good.

    What should have been given a public airing has often been censored, and resulted in so many major topics of national interest being hidden away. Pre-internet, there had not been such a thing as freedom of the press to report on all matters of interest for a long time. Indeed reports were are falsified to satisfy the aims of the ‘Illuminati’ like Mandelson. Journalists would comply rather than risk losing their careers. It took a brave person to stand up to them.

    Large sections of the public have been engrossed in the negativity that the media regularly fed them. We have all grown up on it, so that eventually it had little effect on our emotions. Over time we developed an immunity to being shocked, even by the atrocities committed on a daily basis.

    Truth is not yet surging into our mainstream media outlets like it should be, but it is seeping ever more strongly now that the finger is out of the dike, so to speak.


  46. 120
    welshwiz says:

    The media has traditionally been owned and controlled by those who would like nothing better than to control you. It is obviously not in their interests to inform us of what is truly occurring. Nevertheless the dead tree press no longer have a stranglehold on the dissemination of information. They know this. The truth will come out in spite of their strenuous efforts to contain it.

    The suppression of so many things are for control purposes and for a sustained feeding of the elite class and of a presumed ‘betterness’ on the part of the likes of Mandelson than the rest of humanity. More and more information about how we have been lied to and betrayed by those who claim to working on our behalf will become generally known. Most people, who have been asleep so far, will start to awaken and change the insane reality in which they will see themselves in.


  47. 121
    Gaston says:

    Aah! The dying Dead Tree Press raises its shrunken head from a tread bare grease-stained pillow, gasps weakly for breath between half-formed whispered sentences whilst lone salty tear trickles from the corner of a ravaged, madly swivelling bloodshot eye.

    “All this was once mine” he whispered, briefly clouding the air with his fetid exhalation.


  48. 124
    David Cameron Is A Cunt! says:

    Mandy making a complete and utter Hunt of himself, yet again, is not news at all anymore.


    • 127
      Backwoodsman says:

      Warms the cockles of yer heart though. Some poor scrote is going to tell his oilyness that Fawkes took a swipe at him and 100% of the plebs agreed with his assessment.
      Can’t be much fun looking in the shaving mirror every morning, knowing that your fellow man think you’re a complete berk.


  49. 125
    Fuckus Whittus says:

    They wouldn’t need a larger print run even if they gave the vile rag away for free…..


  50. 129
    Cameron is a liar says:

    I thought the treasonous lying scumbag had been abducted, tortured, skinned, had all his limbs removed, revived and then tortured again until the last gasp of breath farted from his rancid worthless corpse.

    Guess it was all just a happy dream.


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