August 29th, 2012

Andrew Strauss Could Stump Labour in Corby

Many have been wondering why England captain Andrew Strauss has quit international cricket. While it’s probably has more to do with his bad couple of years at the crease and major dramas in the dressing room, it’s well known that Andrew is a Tory and rumoured that he has an interest in moving into politics. He raised £25,000 for the party at a 2011 fundraiser…

With the Tories struggling to find a candidate for the Corby by-election, perhaps it’s time for Strauss to serve again.

Selection meeting is this Friday, could he rise from the Corby ashes?

UPDATE: Strauss has retired not only from international cricket, but from Middlesex too. Coincidently Corby the tourism website says “the area has a long cricketing tradition.”

UPDATE II: Others are circling:


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    More chance with Camerons seat in 2015!

  2. 2
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    But then again, he might bail on the whole idea.

  3. 4
    harryg says:

    do your duty, Strauss!

  4. 5
    On the house says:

    Except them that has Sky sports, like Gordon.

  5. 6
    Loungelizard says:

    Strauss should be able to waltz into the job.

  6. 7
    Engineer says:

    By all accounts Strauss is a thoroughly decent bloke, so he wouldn’t last five minutes in politics.

  7. 8
    Firey Fred says:

    He’ll knock em for six.

  8. 9
    AloneAgain says:

    as a resident of Corby I have to agree with Qwerty (12.21) no one in Corby gives much of a toss about cricket….now if it was an ex Rangers or Celtic player the voters might just turnout in droves!

    • 11
      Ed Moribund says:

      S’leb is s’leb.
      Name recognition goes a long way.

      That’s why I’m doing so badly on the recognition front.
      The other day someone even said “Look-The leader of the liberal Labour party. Its Ted Millhouse “

      • 35
        Thick as Shit Chav in Corby says:

        “According to the 2001 Census the proportion of the working age population with degree-level qualifications (8.5%) is the lowest of all areas in England and Wales. 39.3% have no GCSE-equivalent qualifications at all. The borough of Corby has the highest rate of teenage pregnancy in the East Midlands”

        • 42
          AloneAgain says:

          Thats the vcery place!

          • At Corby Railway Station:

            Newly met should please refrain
            From making love upon the train
            As this could cause embarrassment to you
            If you wish to perform this function
            Kindly wait ’till Corby junction
            ‘Cos there you’ll find there’s fuck all else to do.

            Excerpt from “My Fucking Poems an’ Shit” published by Pished Publishers, Corby.

          • ho hum says:

            To the tune of Humoresque. [Humoresk - not humerskew]

            Was it not Flanders and Swann who penned the original to that little ditty?

    • 17
      Norman Stanley Fletcher says:

      Isn’t it time all those third- or fourth-generation schlock Jocks were cleared out of Corby? The town could do with re-Anglicising.

    • 22
      Location Location Location says:

      As you are a resident of Corby I feel sorry for you.

    • 51
      Still having difficulties with stereotyping I see says:

      Remind me again did Mensch play for the ‘Tic or the Gers ?

  9. 12
    Matte says:

    He’ll bowl them over.

  10. 13
    Louise Mensch says:

    Ha! Ha! Ha!

    Peter and myself are wetting ourselves with laughter at this ludicrous blog.

    It’s a Labour “shoe in” my friend,Guido.

  11. 14
    Ed Moribund says:

    People being made to do work experience for benefits is morally wrong! Its exploitation of the uneducated.
    And more importantly If these people got jobs they’d never vote for me.

  12. 19
    Personality Matters says:

    From Chick Lit to Cricket.

  13. 23
    Dave says:

    Larry attacked me last night, he mistook for a mouse.

  14. 24
    Duckworth and Lewis says:

    The Tories and Cleggs lot are fucked

  15. 25
    Ed Milliband the Turd says:

    I thertainly giff a toth abouth cwicket.

  16. 27
    dahontr3 says:

    corby is rangers or celtic territory.

  17. 28
    UlyssesReturns says:

    Excellent choice.

  18. 29
    Forkbender says:

    Come on Guido, you know want to be a Tory MP, put your oar in, are you a mouse or made of stronger stuff.

  19. 31
    Mrs Smith says:

    Oh great.

    A sporting celebrity. He will have the necessary experience & life skills to convince the inept & failing Cameron & Osbourne to stop spending & cut taxes.

    I doubt he is a Conservative in reality because they are not allowed to stand in elections for the Conservative Party under Cameron.

  20. 39
    Allo Allo Allo says:

    As it’s “silly season” and further to the recent the Clacton “lion” incident [waste of time and money] as Chief Plod I have directed all lesser plods receive training on how to cope [deal with] with any member of the public addressing them “here Kitty, Kitty” without sais plod falling foul of an st***d UE law or any bi***ed, annoying offe***ve feminist lobbyist. All plod have been issued with two pictures – one a lion the other a cat

    I thank you

  21. 41
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Strauss could hit a few Balls in parliament.

  22. 43
    SP4BS says:

    hahahahaa ha a haahaaa

    Just what they need. Parachute an A-lister in. what could possibly go wrong.

  23. 44
    W.G. Grace says:

    He doesn’t have a Chinaman’s chance.

  24. 47
    smoggie says:

    Chris Hoy would be a better choice IMHO (what with all plastic jockoes in town) but Andrew Strauss is an excellent choice anyway.

    I think we need B­il­ly B­o­wd­en’s decision here.

  25. 48
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    Political ambitions aside, England has lost probably its best captain in recent times, clearly hastened by the petulent princess from Pretoria, Pietersen.

    If that self-important rat Pietersen ever plays for any England team again, that’s me finished with a lifetime of Test Cricket supporting. If they ever pick him again, they don’t deserve any support.

    • 59
      Bambi Cook says:

      I am not opposed to his selection altogether. I think he could probably bat at no.5, where Morgan used to, after Cook, Bell, Trott, and Bairstowe. I’m afraid that his inclusion looks increasingly necessary for the Indian tour. It all depends on ow contrite he truly is.

      Personally, I would have had Graeme Swann as the new Captain. He seems to be a decent tactician and a bit of a character, as well as a great spinner. He is batting better than Cook at the moment, too.

      “Eyelashes” Cook reminds me of Ed Milliband.

      I think Strauss is to decent a bloke to be a politician.

  26. 50

    Quite right QWERTY – nor do they give two shits about Andy Sawford’s godfather, Phil Hope, former MP and nominated Sawford for this seat, who claimed £41,000 in dodgy expenses. No, no one cares that this is yet another LieBoring candidate nourished on the fruit of the poisoned tree.

    NOW …. do fuck off.

  27. 53
    Police Chief Whigham of Humberside says:

    Bah all this nonsense about the Essex lion. If it had been reported on my Manor, I would have taken my command team out to the local Chinese and had a slap up meal courtesy of official expenses and just waited till the hysteria died down. Dammed sight cheaper than flying that ‘Copter around for three days. Vote for me !

  28. 62
    Ted Dexter says:

    8illy does!

  29. 64
    Gary Barlow says:

    Dave told me I would get first dibs! Bastard. Anyway, he has a better chance than Boris4Corby, the Facebook page only has one like…

  30. 65
    david says:

    So far we’ve had Chris Evans, (although he’s probably Labour) now we’ve got Strauss waltzing in, Jeeesssuuuuussss, how desperate can you get. There is only question how big the swing to Labour is going to be. With more cracks appearing in the Coalition than there are in Nadine Dorries’s face makeup, if its below 20% Labour should be disappointed, UKIP could even make 2nd.

  31. 68
    Fred Truman says:

    Postal voters are ususally the type of fellows (those that are real people that is) who like cricket I believe. But Corby seems to made up of plastic Jockastanis! Not sure a nice English cricketing chap will fit the bill.

  32. 69
    robbie says:

    Looks like the Tories are really stumped for a credible candidate in Corby.

  33. 74
    Colin Cackmuffin-Woggleby says:

    Andy Sawford is a plonker

  34. 75
    Colin Cackmuffin-Woggleby says:

    Andy Sawford is a silly noodle

  35. 58
    smoggie says:

    Unless you’re a fat cat union baron, how else can you jump the council flat housing queue but get yourself up the duff?

Seen Elsewhere

Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Labour’s Left and Right are Growing Restive | Staggers
Corrupt, Incompetent UN Has No Right to Lecture Us | Dan Hannan
Mirror’s Lazy Lie | Guardian
Hungary’s Heir to Thatcher | Conservative Woman
Farage and Salmond Both Want Outopia | David Aaronovitch
More Missing UKIP Money | Times
Church Should Fight Evil of Welfare Dependency | Stephen Glover
1 in 16 Pick Up Infections in Filthy NHS Hospitals | Mail
Let’s Get Evangelical | David Cameron

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads