August 17th, 2012

Invisible Twigg Misses Labour Field Day

Earlier this morning Guido pointed out that Labour hadn’t been telling the whole story on school playing fields, but it turns out the hypocrisy doesn’t stop there. Shadow Health Secretary Andy Burnham told the New Statesman this month that it was impossible to stop the sale of playing fields:

“It would have been wrong to pass legislation which banned the selling of playing fields entirely, because that would have meant it was impossible to facilitate the development of sporting facilities…In some communities there’s a definite need for more space, but the issue is increasingly more about quality than availability.”

Guido has also come across two very interesting PQs from the invisible Stephen Twigg. The first sets out why Twigg approved the sale of dozens of playing fields while he was in charge of the brief back in 2004:

The second shows that he gave permission for schools to reduce space for children’s sport below the minimum standards, despite the fact that Twigg’s minions have since attacked the Tories for changing the law in order to do the very same: “The Secretary of State’s agreement is needed if changes to the team game playing field provision mean that a school falls, or remains, below the minimum required by the Regulations. Six applications were agreed in 2000, 25 in 2001, 11 in 2002, and 9 so far in 2003.”

The insufferable Kevin Brennan is fighting this on the airways, but for some strange reason Twigg is nowhere to be seen. Maybe the answer lies in the playing fields sold off in Twigg’s own constituency. Guido will look into that later…


  1. 1
    Ed Miliband says:

    We need a root and branch review of this!

  2. 2
    Moussa Koussa says:

    2004 !!!!!. You have really reached rock bottom now Guido.

    Labour NEVER said they would save playing fields….But The Tories DID !!!!!

    ..and having said they would, they U turned ( what a surprise )

  3. 3
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Now let’s see, what’s that old saying about “…[S]o grows the tree”?

  4. 4
    Moussa Koussa says:

    Poor Guido. “Operation Save The Gimp” is in full flow.

    To think you believe The Gimp and Vague are your best hopes for the future….LOL

  5. 5
    smoggie says:

    They don’t stand a cat in hell’s chance against the two Eds. You are most convincing.

  6. 6
    Moussa Koussa's sockpuppet says:

    ConDave and Forest Gump Osbourne, two empty headed dimwits from the school for the idle and not very bright rich. Fur coat and no knickers as me mum would have said.

  7. 7
    Moussa Koussa says:

    Anyway…I’m happy to say that Billy did give me safe passage out of the country ….LOL

  8. 8
    HenryV says:

    School sports is the biggest waste of money. As if 2 hours sport a week is going to do anything for those who aren’t interested. Another empty argument. F*ck hypocritical Labour.

  9. 9
    Terrible But True says:

    No worries.
    The BBC will be all over this.
    They know when questions need to be asked, and answered.
    Or when power needs holding to account. Even when it’s the power they support and supports them, as opposed to all the rest they don’t like.
    I know this, because they keep telling me so.
    Which is why I’m sure, in the spirit of watertight oversight, they have in no way been giving any gob for hire trying to put the boot in the time of day.

  10. 10
    Ed Miliband says:

    I demand a referee-led inquiry.

  11. 11
    Moussa Koussa says:

    I’m happy to say that Bi*l*ly did give me safe passage out of the country ….LOL

  12. 12
    Selohesra says:

    There was a young man called Twigg
    With a face like a very smug pig
    A gayer at heart
    Said as his buttocks did part
    “Stick it in – there is nothing too big”

  13. 13
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Let’s have a level playing field.

  14. 14
    CCHQ says:

    No one is buying this Guido. Raise your game or you’re off the list.

  15. 15
    Stephen Paddy Morrisonsy says:


  16. 16
    I don't need no doctor says:

    How can he raise his game. Labour sold his school playing field.

  17. 17
    Moussa Koussa says:

    indeed, a very weak response, to try an aid the Gimp.

  18. 18
    Roger the Cabin Boy says:

    It was Liebour that outlawed school sports during school hours. I seem to remember that the poor little dears that lost or came second could not continue to have their feelings hurt, along with ‘Elf ‘N Safety legislation making schools too scared to include sports, or for that matter open at the first sign of snow or ice.

  19. 19
    smoggie says:

    Wi­lli­am Ha­gu­e

  20. 20
    Loungelizard says:

    No point they keep moving the goal posts.

  21. 21
    Mark Oaten says:

    I’m loving the sound of that!

  22. 22
    Anonymous says:

    An absolutely pivotal line from Twigg’s answer has been omitted by Fawkes…

    “Of these 41 approved applications, 31 (75 per cent.) resulted in either no change or an increase in the amount of team game playing field provided for schools.”

    Wonder why?

  23. 23
    smoggie says:

    Yup, I see what you mean – you can’t post owt with the name “Wi­ll­i­am Ha­­gu­e” in it.

  24. 24
    Mark Oaten says:

    Can I be your gimp?

  25. 25
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Labour supported by the BBC and Channel 4 news back hypocrisy and lies.
    Remember if it’s not left it’s left our news desks.

  26. 26
    Anonymous says:

    Who gives a fuck, Moussa?

  27. 27
    SP4BS says:

    I don’t believe that the modbot knows that some people are bigger pillocks than other and so deserve more modding.

    The keyword is b-i-l-l-y. A Famous over-poster who was mildly irritating.

  28. 28
    This was broadcast on the BBC! says:

  29. 29
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Unfortunately Twigg is not invisible. As for Brennan he has just been on the BBC News, get a wash you dirty labour scum. What is it with labour and their aversion to soap and water?

  30. 30
  31. 31
    Moussa Koussa's sockpuppet says:

    Moussa – it’s the word ßilly that’s the problem.

  32. 32
    Yes and so was this! says:

  33. 33
    Moussa Koussa says:

    No thread about another Murdoch Mong arrest.

    Cat got your tongue Guido… You were very keen on “Scot Boy Tom S” threads a while back.

    PS …Got your alibi straight…OH DEAR !!!!!

  34. 34
    Wotta Tossa says:

    What’s it like down there at rock bottom ?

  35. 35
    Ffyon says:

    Where’s my Willy?

  36. 36
    Sir William Waad says:

    I hated games when I was at school and would be perfectly happy to see all playing fields turned into Tescos, Tyres-R-Us or breeding boxes for the masses. If we stopped kicking footballs around we might just learn to do something useful and intelligent.

  37. 37
    Wotta Tossa says:

    William Hague.

  38. 38
    This was broadcast on the BBC! says:

    That’s the squeak of the leather chair.

  39. 39
    Guido Schmido says:

    Yenta Watch! Phwoar!

  40. 40
    Maximus Bellend says:

    Labour lost. Get over it.

  41. 41
    Ah! Monika says:

    Twigg by name etc

  42. 42
    kosher puppet Dave says:

    I have just authorised the ‘Shock and Awe’ nuking of Moscow, in retaliation for the egregious act of offending the venerated old yenta, Madonna.

  43. 43
    Maximus Bellend says:

    Poor Moussa.

    Still licking the window clean of the shit spatters left by the rocking-horse riding, bong-eyed, son of the Manse.

  44. 44

    Remember! L is for Labour. L is for Lice.

  45. 45
    Julian Assange says:

    Go Israel! Kick goy ass!!!

  46. 46
    Joanne Hari (had the op y'know) says:

    Ste has just phoned me actually and saud that he’s visiting the DoE in hospital.
    ‘I’m visiting the Duke of Edinburgh in hospital’, is what he said to me and I have faithfully recorded his words nbeneath those of Princess Anne (‘Naff off Hari’)

  47. 47
    Just a reminder says:

    labour lost, get over it!

  48. 48
    SP4BS says:


  49. 49
  50. 50
    Fit enough without the nonsense says:

    It does provide a suitable chance for ignorant PE teachers to put half of the population off any form of exercise.

  51. 51
    Just a reminder says:

    Labour lost, get over it!

  52. 52
    Labour 25 says:

    Get back to Ed’s cock you annoying bitch.

  53. 53
    Fit enough without the nonsense says:

    It is not the losing that put most people off sport, but the stupidity of the teachers involved. Coaching at school level is dire, selection is bonkers and cuts out half the talen pool due to age biases and most people are introduced to sport by people using methods calculated to put them off sport for life

  54. 54
    Ethel Skinner says:

    Isn’t he in the Ecuadorian embassy dear?

  55. 55
    Fit enough without the nonsense says:

    You can tell whether many people enjoyed sports at school simply by asking which end of the academic year their birthday lies. A dispropotionate number of people who recall doing well at school sports were picked for sports and given attention and encouragement because they were the oldest in their class at the age of 11. Children born in June and July tended to be treated like a piece of shit by their teachers. Even when they develop physcially a few years later and start to catch up with their peer groups, the damage has been done as most of them have no experience of being the one who is chosen first, let alone picks the team or captains it.

  56. 56
    Butch says:

    Be very careful, as homophobic comments will not be tolerated blog.

    We have standards you know.

  57. 57
    SP4BS says:

    Well thats not entirely true. The advantages start at the age of 5, and its as much to do with other children, and being better than them.

    Note the months are different in places where the years are split on jan 1st.

  58. 58
    Fit enough without the nonsense says:

    This may well be true about the primary schools being part of the problem, you are right , but the principle holds. What never ceases to amaze me is the way this system demonstrates the lack of proper lesson planning by sports teachers, who quite obviously give little or no thought to what they intend to achieve in lessons where their individual charges are concerned.

  59. 59
    CCHQ says:

    “I seem to remember that the poor little dears that lost or came second could not continue to have their feelings hurt,”

    We got over it in the end.

  60. 60
    Anonymous says:

    Before the election councils in England held the title deeds to schools and land valued at £billions
    But most people don’t know the very fine print of the academies bill means:

    1. The title deeds of the school and the very often the school land too are transferred to a private company when the school becomes an academy
    2. Michael Gove borrows £25,000 to pay the legal fees for the private companies to ensure the title deeds are transferred from the council (us taxpayers who paid to build the schools – to these private companies)
    So far £1billion of title deeds for schools have been transferred from taxpayers – with Michael gove increasing the deficit by £481,750,000 – just for legal fees to transfer ownership of the schools from councils to private companies
    So who has the title deeds now
    Tory party member Philip Harris has his hands on £millions worth of title deeds. (Philip Harris made donations to David Cameron as leader of the Conservative Party. He is considered to be one of his personal friends)
    Stanley Fink, another friend of Cameron has donated £2.62m to the Conservative party and David Cameron made Fink a Lord as soon as he came to power, and David Cameron has since made him Tory Party Treasurer and also handed his company £millions title deeds for schools
    And today David Cameron has told us, as well as changing the law to transfer state assets to Tory party members (and I thought only China did that) – now he is changing the laws to allow them to start selling the Land
    Just so you know – Stanley Fink – his company states in their accounts – any extra money – his company has a policy to transfer the funds to the Cayman Islands – via a stockbrokers that Stanley fink just happens to be on the board of
    And already Stanley Fink via ARK is selling school land
    Eliot School becomes an ARK academy in September
    This article references ‘Eliot School’ in Wandsworth as one that is selling part of its land.
    This is a link to information on the school’s web-site. Look at what they’re disposing :
    The country wil never, ever get that land back (if hedge fund god and Tory Party Treasurer Stanley Fink has anything to do with it).
    Now if I remember correctly the directors of southern cross did the same thing with care homes – selling them off – the money disappears offshore the company goes bust and pensioners left high and dry (with taxpayers expected to step in)
    Well Cameron has just announced Tory party members who have their hands on the title deeds for our schools and the school land can start doing the same thing
    And just to be clear – Stanley Fink’s company accounts for the schools also state – if Stanley fink’s company controlling the schools, the school budgets and the title deeds goes bust – Stanley Fink (Tory party treasurer on the Times rich list) only has to pay £10
    Academies are not about education – they are about asset stripping and English parents and children, will find themselves, just like the pensioners and their families who were left without facilities due to the very rich directors of Southern Cross selling off the assets and disappearing in to the sunset
    Do MIchael Gove and David Cameron shout from the rooftops that they are spending £25,000 per school to cover legal fees to transfer the title deeds to Tory Party members – no
    I wonder why not – could it be they don’t want England’s parents to know the real intentions of the academies bill – it’s not about education – it is about asset stripping by Tory Party members – thanks to David Cameron, Michael Gove, every Tory MP and every LIberal MP
    These are your schools – they do not belong to the Tory Party (well they do now)
    Ask Michael Gove if your council gets the money when they sell off school land
    Ask Stanley Fink (ARK SCHOOLS) – will this Tory Party treasurer be selling playing fields and as his accounts state, the money be transferred to the Cayman Islands (with his stockbrokers taking a cut along the way)
    Stanley Fink did not pay 1 penny for any of the schools he holds the title deeds for
    Stanley Fink did not pay 1 penny for the playing fields he is now selling
    you elected councillors to run schools and they did it for years without selling the land and the title deeds were kept in trust for you
    And councils have never transferred education funds to the Cayman Islands via Stockbrokers they own
    Which is exactly why only democratically elected, accountable councillors can be trusted with the title deeds

  61. 61
    Stephen Twigg - opportunistic twat says:

    “Labour NEVER said they would save playing fields….But The Tories DID !!!!!”

    So it’s alright for Labour to sell off playing fields because they never said they wouldn’t and therefore it’s fine for them to bemoan the lack of said playing fields just because the Tories said they wouldn’t sell them but did?

    That is the thrust of your argument? Really?

  62. 62
    Stephen Twigg - opportunistic twat says:

    Maybe you should use his real name then, idiot.

  63. 63
    Taxi! says:

    Why weren’t there lots more PE teachers in Team GB? After all, with constant exercising they must be among the fittest folk in the land.

  64. 64
    Taxi! says:

    This sounds like the Tory equivalent of the Union Modernisation Fund.

  65. 65
    Eena, meena, mina, mo, catch a n1gger by the toe, if he hollers, let him go, Eena, meena, mina, mo. says:

  66. 66
    Pious Gordon says:

    United Nations Special Envoy for Global Education. Unpaid role. (Registered 18 July 2012)

  67. 67
    Slippery Slope says:


  68. 68
    Guido Muhammad Saeed al-Sahhaf Fawkes says:

    Its interesting to note that Guido hasnt mentioned that he has today been caught tampering with his own wiki article….

  69. 69
    ShowBizforuglypeople says:

    what’s this Guido?

    You somehow appear to have missed the stat that over 10,000 playing fields were sold off under the Tories between 79 and 97 whilst the NuLa disaster sold ‘only’ 226 between 97 to 2010, most of which were from schools which were relocated or closed.

  70. 70
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Errmm, Guido’s Twitter activity did, if one could actually have been arsed to look.
    But don’t let the facts get in the way of an insinuation.

  71. 71
    Anonymous says:

    Twigg is a useless cυnt. Just like the rest of the traitors of NuLab.

    Gove is still a wanker, plundering schools to make his rich mates richer.

  72. 72
    Anonymous says:

    You didn’t because it didn’t happen.

    Just another tory lie.

  73. 73
    Anonymous says:

    Greedo, apparently.

  74. 74
    Anonymous says:

    This may have all been true once, and perhaps still is in some places.

    These days there is plenty of sophisticated software that can be used to record and report all these factors so planning can and should be much better.

    Instead of just whining why don’t you make sure these things get used.

  75. 75
    Anonymous says:

    sounds like tory scum stealing from the public


  76. 76
    Anonymous says:

    He’s just peeved Gove hasn’t offered him any of the loot.

  77. 77
    Moussa's Intern says:

    Ashcroft! Ashcroft!……sorry boss are we still taking this line? all you gave last week was Ashcroft and Thatcher, and the bit about not mentioning playing field sales..oh shit,sorry.

  78. 78
    Moussa's Intern says:

    Thatcher,Thatcher..PS could you give me a call as this does not seem to be working…..any guidance on playing field sales yet? PPS off to start my shift in Nando’s now,will do the photocopying later.

    Please tell Ed I have shredded the receipts as requested

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