August 15th, 2012

Chancellor of Fire

The Prime Mentalist has caused a stir north of the border by recreating the famous opening scene from Chariots of Fire. Still dressed in a suit, Brown sprinted across a Scottish beach with former first minister Henry McLeish. A stunned eyewitness reported:

They were suited and booted and I wondered if it was a photo call. But there were no cameras in sight. They carried on to the front of the beach and it looked as if they were making a line in the sand. Brown ran about 50 metres and then stopped. The others stopped for a second but then carried on and ran for another 300 metres.”

Knowing Gordon, they probably should have let him win…


69 Comments

  1. 1
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m kicking against the pricks.

    Like

  2. 2
    Tess Tecal says:

    They should have thrown him into the sea.

    Like

  3. 3
    Gordon Brown-Stuff says:

    Oh deary me…..I’m splattered all over again nurse….I was only really good at being a Number Two, you know……….

    Like

  4. 7
    Liarpoliticians says:

    Gordon Brown says if Scotland sticks with the UK, we can “pool resources” (from English taxpayers).

    Like

  5. 8
    Andrew Efiong says:

    Aha, Brown is on the run now!

    He was probably trying to escape the toxic radioactive rubbish that he ignored for so long near his constituency.

    It reminds me of a Kinnock classic

    Like

    • 62
      Gordon the Mong says:

      I will have you know that I even make love in my suit, ask Sarah if you don’t believe me.

      Like

  6. 10
    Left wing Socialist fuckwit says:

    You know Guido you really must put up a health warning before placing a picture of that utter utter twat on any website. Either way the fucker should be breaking rocks at Broadmoor not prancing across the sand.

    Perhaps someone could though point him in the direction of Parliament to do the job HE IS FUCKING PAID TO DO!!!!!

    Like

  7. 13
    anon and loving it. says:

    IDS just marmalised a very negative Charlotte Hawkins ( dead fit by the way) on Sky News on every point put to him. Excellent performance.
    Has anyone else noticed how left wing/anti government sky have become in the last 6 months. Is Rupert flexing his muscles in a show of petulance?

    Like

  8. 16
    Moussa Koussa says:

    Yawn.

    Nice to see another British company getting a kick in the teeth. Largest Rail franchise now in the hands of the yanks. Well done Justine “ Jolly Hockey sticks” Greening

    Like

  9. 18
    Steve Miliband says:

    Can he now become a Church of Scotland Missionary in China?

    Like

    • 33
      genghiz the kahn says:

      Gordon’s a Church Missionary,
      He’s saving young girls from sin,
      He’ll save you a blonde for 10/-,
      My God how the money rolls in.

      Like

  10. 24

    Chancellor’s pant on fire

    The true story of a Scots marathon false accounting athlete competing in the 2010 summer election race. A devout Scottish missionary who runs for God, gold and the love of power.

    Eric Littell – Gordon Brown
    Sam Mussabini – Keith Vaz
    Jennie Littell – Sarah Brown
    Lord Andrew Lindsay – David Cameron

    Soundtrack – by the Arctic Monkeys

    Like

    • 37
      Steve Miliband says:

      Producer – Lord Peter of MandyChump
      Director – Len McHusky of Unite

      Like

    • 51
      The Screenplay abridged says:

      …..however his dream of performing at the Olympics are dashed when he is overlooked in place of a young whippersnapper called Blair who then goes on to win Gold at three successive Games before being cast out after it was revealed he misled the Olympic Comittee over a particularly disasterous Athletic venture he organised in foreign lands.
      Having spent this time plotting his revenge Brown seizes the moment and is selected ( unopposed) to be the lead man in the British Olympic Relay Team, however on the day of the race Brown is found to be not up to the job and drops the baton on the first Lap thus securing an inglorious defeat for the Nation .

      Like

  11. 25
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Just out of purely morbid curiosity and for no other reason, I pose the question, has anyone ascertained the sobriety (or lack thereof) of the two gentlemen in question at the time and place of occurrence?

    In short: Were they pickled, or what?

    Like

  12. 26
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Is there another missing person from ML11 8RP?

    Like

  13. 29
    smoggie says:

    Still chasing all over Obama Beach I see.

    Like

  14. 31
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    What an absolute effing twerp this man is.

    Like

  15. 35
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    Funny how you only see Brown nowadays when he is on holiday.

    Like

  16. 38
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today i will be doing the Mobot !

    Like

  17. 40
    Aunty Matter says:

    The BBC were spinning that unemployment wouldn’t fall this month (the BBC say that every month) yet once again it falls.

    So just turning on the BBC TV news I hear some BBC twat moaning about unemployment once again. Funny that the BBC doesn’t seem to think that Labour’s employing of over 1,000,000 extra people in the public sector we can’t afford is a problem.

    Like

    • 48
      Disenfranchined Conservative says:

      Why should the BBC think it’s a problem? After all, David Camoron doesn’t.

      Like

    • 54
      BBC says:

      Thank you for your views.
      The BBC strives to ensure that its news and current affairs coverage is accurate, verified and free from bias.

      We have investigated your claim but cannot see any evidence that the baby seal clubbing, benefits cutting, hospital closing, privatising, banker kissing Tory party has reduced unemployment.

      Like

    • 64
      Points of view says:

      The Today programme tried its best to link the Tories with suicides this morning.

      Like

  18. 41
    Steve Miliband says:

    So that’s another beach in Fife affected by contaminated matter.

    Like

  19. 43
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    Give the guy a break will you? He needs a good long holiday after all that work he hasn’t been doing in Westminster.

    Like

  20. 59
    Moussa Koussa's pet budgie says:

    “Syria crisis: Blast near Damascus military compound”

    I see they’re spending Hague’s £5m wisely.

    Like

  21. 60
    Gordon McVandal says:

    British beaches for asylum seekers

    Like

  22. 63
    Deep Froat says:

    Gordon is just great. Why I bet he could breath underwater for an hour…please Gordon just try it…..

    Like

  23. 68
    Martin Gaughan says:

    It was me that seen it and phoned the daily record

    Like

  24. 69
    robbie says:

    Was the results at Atlanta an argument for the Union too?

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

What Happens Now | James Kirkup
Cairo of the North | Quentin Letts
Labour are the Biggest Losers | Phil Collins
Westminster Will Never Allow Referendum Again | Daily Mash
Yes Scotland’s Geo-Targeting Advertising Fail | MessageSpace
#IndyRef Twitter Map | Trendsmap
Westminster Has Patronised Scots | Scottish Sun
What Happens in the Event of a Recount? | Breitbart
Yes Side Emphatically Won Campaign | Speccie
Joyce Thacker on Sick Leave | Doncaster Free Press
Claire Perry Slams ‘Goodies’ for Scots | Sun


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The Prime Minister feels the pressure:

“I have to say that after the events I have been facing over the last few days, assassination would be a welcome release.”



It was only a tiny tiny collision.


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