August 14th, 2012

Oxford Tory “Used BBC Show to Smear Opponents
Joe Cooke Solicited TV Documentary

It seems that there is more than meets the eye to last week’s BBC2 hatchet job documentary exploring the life of former Oxford University Conservative Association (OUCA) president Joe Cooke. Guido has learned the camp silver-suited boy-of-the-people is facing claims that he personally and deliberately organised the programme in an attempt to smear his political opponents. The dirty tricks start at a young age.

When OUCA were originally approached on behalf of the BBC the response was an unequivocal “no“. Cooke himself warned that it had the “potential to be a disaster“, while another Oxford Tory says: “the overall verdict was that they’d make us look like tw*ts“. However, Guido is told that Cooke then independently emailed the television company to suggest making a programme focusing on himself. His motivation has come into question from those involved:

Cooke wanted to use the BBC to attack his potential successors in the national press, it was more than coincidence that a camera crew turned up as soon as he became president. He has a history of smearing his opponents, you can see from the show he how he attacked his predecessors. He was also after a safe seat in Yorkshire.

That despite Guido seeing an email from Cooke in which he warned his colleagues: “we must not allow vanity to harm the association“. Says the boy with the silver-topped cane…


  1. 1
    OMG says:

    What a rotter!


  2. 2
    Norman Tebbit says:

    “Oxford Tory says: “the overall verdict was that they’d make us look like tw*ts“”

    Wouldn’t be hard would it?


  3. 3
    Golden Boy says:

    Should make an excellent MP


  4. 4
    Mr Hague says:

    I have a very safe seat in Yorkshire


  5. 5
    not in OUCA says:

    OUCA looking like ‘tw*ts’? Never.


  6. 6
    Jimmy says:

    I’m pretty broadminded and accept that some people will experiment with conservatism at college. There is disturbing evidence however that this may be linked with conservatism in later life. Will no one think of the children?


  7. 7
    Sam Hoy says:

    I dont know why everyone is having a go at this guy. It was awful that he had to change his accent and keep his history secret to fit in!


    • 48
      Disgruntled Sheffielder says:

      Because he’d lied in the first place


      • 59
        johnnyterror says:

        He didn’t change his accent. He sounded like that at school. The photo is him at school. He dressed like that for parties. Just part of his convenient narrative to justify after the fact.


        • 82
          Anonymous says:

          Im his sister and he certainly didnt sound like that at school. I think instead of writing comments on a piece which once again is sheer lies is pathetic!! If you went to school with Joe you will surely know where he lives! Come round and lets chat !!!
          Alexandra Cooke


          • Living in 98 percent white Merseyside says:

            His accent and attitude remind me of some of the types who live in Liverpool 18.


  8. 8
    Anonymous says:

    “another Oxford Tory says: “the overall verdict was that they’d make us look like tw*ts“”

    That must have been a challenge.


  9. 10
    Anonymous says:

    If only he had been obsessed about cheese and biscuits then none of this would have happened


  10. 14
    Nullbymouth says:

    ‘He has a history of smearing his opponents’

    What, with KY Jelly Lube?


  11. 19
    Sir William Waad says:

    He thinks he’s Ken Tynan! No, sonny, Kenneth Tynan you ain’t.


  12. 21
    Moussa Koussa says:

    Unfortunately he is the core of the Tory Future Fraternity


  13. 22
    FagBot says:

    He’d look good on the end of my cane.


  14. 23 says:

    Does this mean that the standard Labour voter has a cloth cap and a whippet?


  15. 24

    SNP ministers allowed Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed al-Megrahi to be given abiraterone (prostate cancer drug) at the cost of the taxpayer whilst denying it to all Scottish citizens … until their eventual climbdown yesterday.


    • 26
      Sir William Waad says:

      There’s always plenty of money for Abroad and foreigners.


      • 36
        Lou Scannon says:

        A deal has been struck between the Indians and the Jockanese whereby the Indians will build a bar on Mars.
        It will be called TCIF (Thank Cameron, It’s Fryday).


  16. 25
    Terrible But True says:

    Seems the lad is a shoo-in to boost the roster (necessary stiff competition from Laurie Penny, Jonnie Marbles and Owen Jones, mind) occupied In some minds chez Aunty by oldsters Jeremy Clarkson, Andrew Neil and, most hilariously still, Nick Robinson.

    Bringing the ‘balance’ tally to 19,997 to 3 or, as the BBC would have it when things look a bit iffy on the objectivity front, a ‘split’.

    Meanwhile, on the holding ‘power to account’ basis everyone, from Helen Boaden to the outgoing DG, must have thought all their boats has arrived…

    “use the BBC to attack his potential successors in the national press”

    The BBC? Happily allowing itself to sow discord won an enemy of enemy basis hen it suits? I am shocked… shocked.

    Actually this sweetheart seems to deserve all his career path deserves, and those he purports to support for allowing themselves to get in such a pickle, but one does still wonder if our most trusted national media monopoly remains a tad selective on what it chooses to report, and what not, even… or especially if handed to them on a plate.


  17. 30
    Joe cooke says:

    The markers of the man who eats badgers were always going to find me.


  18. 31
    Lefties are thick, righties are nasty says:

    All the programme did was expose Oxford Tories singing Nazi songs and making anti-s*mitic comments. Nothing surprising there.


    • 43
      smoggie says:

      Surely this was after Ed Balls’ time there?


    • 71
      jgm2 says:

      Singing Nazi songs? Really? I didn’t see the show – what Nazi songs were they singing?

      These are 18 year old kids. How the fuck would they even know any Nazi songs? You’d have to really go out of your way to find and learn a Nazi song I’d have thought.


  19. 32
    CCHQ says:

    Why haven’t we kicked this disaster out of the conservative party yet?


  20. 33
    genghiz the kahn says:

    When are the BBC going to show how to get on in the Labour Party – young, gifted and related to an MP. Keeping It In The Family.

    Or young, gifted and fanatical about joining the Eurozone – how to be a blood sucking clegg.

    Nothing on young, hip, gifted and one of Salmongs young Gnats.

    It looks like a stitch up fronted by the BBC’s fearless camp crusader.


  21. 34
    Joe Cook says:

    See you all in Corby soon proles, I am parachuting in.

    fnarr fnarr


    • 80
      SaltPetre says:

      In Liverpool, the supply of hob-nailed boots and steel toe caps would long since be exhausted before the populous there grew tired of kicking the shit out of both subjects of the Wonderland documentary.


  22. 37
    Moussa Koussa says:

    Poor Guido, flip flopping again.

    I see Cockeroons Photographer is busy posting pics of Dave chillaxing, Dave with the kids, Dave having a coffee…Yawn.

    Anyway Guido, according to John Bercow, are you embittered and resentful. I think those two terms sum up you and Holey Moley


  23. 45
    jgm2 says:

    Please tell me the silver-caped twat was going to a fancy dress party.


    • 61
      johnnyterror says:

      No he dressed like this at school. Used to have these briefcases, louis vuitton, while the rest of us had a rucksack. Always dressed head to toe in designer. This might have been for a formal party.


    • 68
      The mates of Dick Branksome says:

      He seems to be wearing some sort of condom – seems appropriate.


  24. 53
    jgm2 says:

    I find it incredible in this day and age with a camera in every phone that twats like Joe Cooke, who profess to have political ambition, will allow themselves to be photographed dressed like this.

    The bedwetters don’t need to say a word when putting up a candidate against the likes of Joe Cooke. They need only circulate that photograph. It screams hyper-privileged arsehole.

    What is even more depressing is that these characters obviously operate in an environment where such behaviour is seen as entirely normal. They really don’t help address the bedwetter allegations that the T*ry party is ‘out of touch’.


  25. 66
    Moussa Koussa's pet Siberian hamster says:

    Forcing people to work till they drop, reducing pensions, making public sector workers redundant, slashing public services, increasing the cost of university education, reducing benefits for the disabled … giving houses worth £1.25 million houses to foreigners, increasing foreign aid to £14 billion a year. Yes it could only be a British government – loads of money for foreigners, no money for their own people. Can you imagine a French government doing that? No, neither can I. It’s the British Tory Party.


  26. 72
    Enemy of the State says:

    Looks like a cross between Batman’s Boy Robin and a hamster.


  27. 75
    Anonymous says:

    What’s great is that in the second photo you can just make out his “disadvantaged” families Rolls Royce!


  28. 77
    whitechapel says:

    They’re not even the same suit! One is double breasted the other single. Different bow ties for different nights. I don’t think he was bullied for being from upt north, but for coming over like a twat. Pity for OUCA’S sake they did’nt manage to get rid off him before their entire rep was destroyed. I’m going to Oxford from October. No chance I’m going near these nutters now.


    • 79
      SaltPetre says:

      On the contrary. You should wear outrageously camp clothes and flounce around drinking port all day – but in an ironic ‘knowing’ way.


  29. 78
    Douglas Turd says:

    People on here are saying that he was also a twat at school and that lots of other people went to Oxbridge from that school as well. What school did he go to and can anyone provide any more of a pen portrait of what he was like before Oxford? Or can I assume that he was exactly the same as we saw on the tv?


    • 97
      no comment says:

      You think wisely


    • 113
      Anonymous says:

      If you listen to his sister he was completely different before Oxford, if you listen to me (didn’t know him well at school but was in his year) and others on here who say the same he was exactly the pretentious creep he appears in the programme.


  30. 81
    Skanky student says:

    Jog on.


  31. 83
    Alexandra Cooke says:

    Guido Fawkes,

    I think before you write a piece like this you should get your facts right. The BBC approached Joe after doing a piece with an online film crew for the elections (see beginning of the documentary for this footage). They have been filming Joe since the begginning of 2010.

    During this time Joe was subject to horendous bullying from the new OUCA members which lead to him standing up for his beliefs and including the information in the documentary.

    There was over 200 hours of footage so surely a man of your intelligence can understand how the BBC have edited this footage to make it appear the main focus was about the scandal.

    Alexandra Cooke


    • 92
      Depressed license payer says:

      Alexandra: your programme has a major flaw. Joe´s scandal related to events before his term, apparently filmed at the time by a person or persons close to him. Yet, during his term of office, he did absolutely nothing with this material, but suddenly developed a profound concern about such unacceptable events when he was no longer in office. Why? Would it not seem obvious that if he really cared, he would not just try to force through his so called reforms but would act on obviously unacceptable conduct first, rather than using it for leverage? Does this not make him a low life hack with no moral fibre whatsoever (whatever he may have told you)? Also, what kind of character is proud of stealing data and taping people (illegally?)… How low can you go, Joe?

      Separately, you claim to have ample footage of bullying…why did you not show this in the film…? Did you not have just a little gap to show a possibly real issue, rather than emphasizing a crisis seemingly developed by Joe for his own benefit? Or was the so called bullying after the event, when his ex colleagues showed their contempt of Joe´s conduct, and his disloyalty to the group he had just presided?

      All this points to biased reporting based around an egotistical and disloyal individual with zero morality… Frankly, both aspects reflect really poorly on those involved. I echo 84´s view…has it come to this?? Shameful. Next time, please replicate the same but for the Labour equivalent. There are vile, unpleasant buffoons in all major parties, not just one.


      • 94
        Oxford Lady says:

        Well said that man.


      • 98
        Alexandra Cooke says:

        Believe what you like


        • 105
          ed heath says:

          You weren’t there man! You weren’t at oxford so you have to go by your brothers lies. Put him in an asylum don’t get him attention.


          • Emma says:

            Is she Joe Cooke’s sister then? Wondered why she cared so much…

            Seriously if Joe Cooke was my brother I’d be hanging my head in shame and wondering why he was so ashamed of his family he felt the need to lie about them. I’d be seriously pissed with my brother if he aired all my family stuff on tv just to try and get sympathy while screwing over people who he was supposed to be friends with. How dare he say that OUCA judged him because of his family if he didn’t tell them about his family – you can’t judge someone on something your don’t know about him. Looks to me like they judged him based on his stabbing them in the back and being such a freak not on his background…


          • Anonymous says:

            That is what the thing needs, institutionalising.


          • Anonymous says:

            Here Here !


      • 114
        Anonymous says:

        Absolutely right!


    • 95
      stock and b says:

      No that was vice mag that caused enough damage at the time. Serial liars


    • 102
      Anonymous says:

      The footage of the election was originally filmed for vice magazine not for Joe Cooke and his programme. The first time his cameras showed up was, as Guido says, immediately after him became president at the boat race.


  32. 84
    the savant says:

    has it come to this


  33. 86
    Joanne Craven Cooke says:

    What a sneaky thoroughly awful individual this person is. I’m ashamed and embarrassed may even drop the ‘Cooke’ for a while. My dad would turn in his grave.


  34. 88
    Wanna know says:

    He looks like Quentin Crisp. Is he one?


  35. 89
    Taking the biscuit says:

    he looks like a ginger nut.


  36. 93
    Barrister G says:

    He was never bullied. Nor is his father in prison he died years ago. The entire Joe Cooke show is based on utter lies everything he said can easily ne deconstructed.


    • 100
      Alexandra Cooke says:

      Brian Cooke died 6 years ago in February. He was in prison for nearly 6 years in the 90’s . Get your facts right!!!


      • 103
        Emma says:

        The point is that it made it look like The father of Joe Cooke was in prison now, I don’t understand why they didn’t say he passed away, surely that would have made Joe Cooke a more sympathetic figure


  37. 96
    Sara P says:

    Let’s face it Cooke was an utter joke during his time, not because he came from Yorkshire but because of his wildly misjudged behaviour. After sampling the booze and food he ‘supplied’ during his tenure I would also ask where all the funds went.


    • 104
      Confused says:

      Absolutely right – if Joe Cooke was so shunned and bullied by Oxford Conservatives how come they made him their President – just doesn’t make sense


  38. 101
    Anonymous says:

    This show sounds like it was great fun.

    When’s the repeat?


  39. 107
    Joe Cooke says:



  40. 109
    Halifax Tory says:

    OUCA elected Joe Cooke…unopposed. So that shows how they hated him for his Northern background. What total drivel. He was VOTED IN UNOPPOSED.

    So how come the poor boy is whining and persecuted ? Could it be a few people did not appreciate his trickery and told him as much? If so, wholly deserved.

    Yorkshire people take pride in our honesty and consistency not our ability to lie and cheat. Joe should NEVER be chosen to represent us.


  41. 111
    TomJep says:

    Where can I see this programme? Sounds a laugh.


  42. 112
    Halifax Tory says:

    It´s also a bit strange that he needed free school meals but the Independent report him hosting Cava and Quail egg parties on the Oriel lawns, and Westwood suits go for 2 grand a throw…

    There are plenty of people who would love to have that sort of money just to cover the mortgage and the monthly bills…times must have improved for Joe. They do not sell many Quail Eggs in Kingsgate to my knowledge….


    • 115
      Anonymous says:

      Free school meals are measured on income aren’t they, so you can have loads of money and still get them if your parents don’t work? Could be wrong but I thought that was how it worked…


  43. 116
    Alexandra Cooke says:

    The reason Joe couldn’t talk till the age of 5 was because daddy used to always say from his cell, “talking gets you into trouble in prison”. If only Joe had applied this wise lesson to broader life he wouldn’t have made such a Hunt of himself.


  44. 117
    Sherlock Holmes says:

    Where did the Cooke family get all their money from?!? They had a bloody servant cleaning round cleaning that slag of his sister on the sofa. Rolls in the drive. Or is just because the police don’t reclaim property from criminal scum any more?


    • 119
      Scarlet says:

      Haha so true the dad was traffiking drugs back in the 90’s.


      • 120
        Anonymous says:

        You shouldn’t take the piss out of Joe Cooke because of his family, that’s exactly what he’s accusing people of doing so in a way you’re proving him right. Besides there’s SO much about Joe Cooke, the man himself, to take the piss out of we don’t need to (although his sister is perhaps an exception as, by going crazy on here, she’s rather opened herself up to public comment)


  45. 121
    Cooke's neighbour says:

    I live near these pikeys and they spoil a good area. Every time they have a party (which seems to be every week) the sister sings. I say sings but I have to tape the windows so they dont smash . The mother who looks like an aged finger puppet seems to tbhink she owns Kew Gardens. I’ve seen little of the son he never appears at these lousy parties. Just wish these scrubbers would move away.


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Find out more about PLMR

Austrian Chancellor Werner Faymann on Cameron’s refusal to pay the £1.7 billion EU bill by December 1st:

“Well, then he’s gonna pay on December 2nd”

Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!

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