August 11th, 2012

Romney Picks Ryan

Mitt Romney has picked Congressman Paul Ryan, an ideological proponent of tax and spending cuts, to be his vice-presidential running mate. Romney at a stroke has squared the restless Republican right-wing and tea partiers. The election moves from being a referendum on Obama – “are you better off now than you were 4 years ago” – to a choice about the kind of future America the voters want. A socialised European-style America or a low tax, free enterprise America.

Rep. Paul Ryan first came on to Guido’s radar in 2011 when as chairman of the House Budget Committee he launched this 3-minute video

He should kick Biden’s ass in the televised VP Debates…


  1. 1
    Pollytwaddle says:

    Can’t wait to see what She Who Lives In Tuscany has to say about this.

    Twaddle, I’ll bet!

    • 27
      Can't be long now says:

      I can’t wait for her to die of an age-related illness.

    • 30
      Bonkers says:

      But why would the Yanks want to set up a little European style state anyway? But then again they did elect a Muslim to be their leader.

      • 73
        Faceless Bureaucrat says:

        Good call by Mitt – Could the Game have just changed for the GOP?…

        • 133
          Anonymous says:

          It’s still likely to remain a colonial outpost of the Knesset though, and Romney a puppet. Special u7nderpants don’t make him immune.
          Yank Goy, get ready to die for and pay for more defence of the chosen ones whom you serve “like donkeys”.

          • rick says:

            He has already told them that they can guarantee his support if they should decide to attack Iran – or any other country of their choosing. I hope he was just sucking up to them for political reasons.

          • CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

            Anonymong, I bet you believe your copy of “The Protocols Of Zion” is factual.The way some contributors to this blog seem to think Hebrews are responsible for all the ills of this world makes me wonder if some of them would have been happy making sure the trains to Auschwitz ran on time.

            By the way I have no connection with the Jewish faith and,yes, there are some things that successive Israeli governments have done that we can legitimately criticise, but show me any government in the Middle East that have done their politics any better.

          • Where do these people crawl from under says:

            Cripes, I thouht it was only M0hammedans who took the Protocols of the Elders of Zion seriously nowadays.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            You don’t have to believe the Protocols to see the tentacles…

          • Anonymous says:

            Never mind “The Protocols…” it’s all there in the Talmud for you to read.
            Just search ” Talmud tidbits “. Then you’ll get to wonder about the real origin of the Protocols.

        • 463
          Anonymous says:

          Ryan is nearly as weird as Romney. These clowns will get their asses kicked when they get more TV exposure.

      • 195
        Trahison des Clercs says:

        Hence his keen support for the Alki-Eider ‘freedom fighters’ in Sirria. Can’t say the same for ‘Don’t be Vague’. What’s his motive?

    • 39
      Sally Bercow says:
      • 46
        Tom Daley says:

        Rubbish! Justin Bieber´s a much better diver than me.

        • 514
          Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

          Depends what sort of diving you are talking about. I would certainly be an olympic champion in the muff sort. Jahbulon.

      • 50
        Out of Touch says:

        Who’s Justin Bieber?

      • 115
        Ed Milibat says:

        John Bercow is the poison dwarf of politics

      • 215
        Expat Geordie says:

        Sorry Sally, but what sort of diver would that be? I remember when you were Sally Iveson that you didn’t make it all that attractive for us to be “divers”. You have to give us men an incentive to do that sort of thing, like washing it occasionally.

    • 58
      Barry says:

      I hope the Romney fellow wins. Obama is a socialist step too far, as are his assassination death drones.

      • 174
        AC1 says:

        Any marxism is a step too far.

      • 325
        Anonymous says:

        Are you serious, Mitt Romney is really coming over as being a bit thick, he has just introduced thei Ryan character as the next President !

        • 406
          Things you don't hear on the Beeb says:

          He’ll be saying that there are 57 states in the union and that Austrians speak Austrian, next.

          • Tay King-dePisse says:

            Who can forget his famous lauding of an heroic Navy “Corpse Man” (i.e.,” corpsman,” pronounced “Korman” = “medic”). Sadly, many of those brave non-combatants do, in fact, deal with corpses, so the gaffe is doubly hideous, as it sounds like a sick joke which the Corpsmen may tell on themselves but would be in the worst of taste coming from anyone else:

            To further compound the problem, he refers to Seaman Bouchard both as “Christian” and “Christopher,” and manages to render “etats unis,” Kreyol pronunciation “e-TAHZ eenie”, as something sounding like “In Tanzania.” A bit of the old Freudian slip from an American president of Kenyan ancestry?

    • 104
      Anonymous says:

      It’s character, stupid.

      Obama is the biz. He does it better. The whiteys will get mauled in the debate.

      • 137
        Dan Hoolihan says:

        Obama is not as impressive as you think he is. And without his team of speech writers and Autocue he sounds just like Gorgon Frown. Ryan could ideologically tear Obama´s nationalization agenda to shreds, if given the chance.

        • 175
          AC1 says:

          The Zero’s similarly as narcissistic as Gordo. He sounds rubbish when not in front of TOTUS.

          I think Romney will be a lot better President than expected.

          • Expat Geordie says:

            Agreed. I liked George W as a person, but economically he was slightly to the left of Bill Clinton. Considering the job that needs doing, and the current mess that the US economy is in, the US needs another Reagan, or a Thatcher. Romney and Ryan could fit that bill, I hope.

        • 223
          Ann Dunham says:

          What do you mean the Harvard graduate who thinks that Europe is a country is unimpressive you half racist?

    • 281
      the savant says:

      no toynbee i ll bet !!

    • 322
      Anonymous says:

      Did you hear Mitt do it again on the radio ? he introduced Paul Ryan as “the next President of the United States !”im starting to wonder if hes a bit thick.

    • 488
      Terrible But True says:

      It would appear that she who is the BBC’s (genetically impartial – (c) Boaden. H) Economics 2xEditorette has turned to twitter (views her own) to chip in.

      ‘Stephanie Flanders ‏@BBCStephanie

      Ryan is risky VP choice for Romney. Republicans now so extreme, his main appeal 4 swing voters was record as a moderate. Ryan anything but.’

      Always intrigued what it takes to be labelled ‘extreme’ from the best and brightest at our most trusted national broadcaster.

      Maybe there was a memo from the DG?

  2. 2
    Joe E Biden, VP of the greatest empire anywhere says:

    Trust Willard to choose a gym-rat.

    • 13
      I Remember You Hoo says:

      Anyone who sends the Obammunist, big obtrusive state, spend, spend, spend, debt, debt, debt, morons into apoplectic foam flecked rage, is ok in my book.

      Good pick by Romney.

  3. 3
    Grateful says:

    At last? . . . . a re-awakening of the GOP?

  4. 4
    gramma says:

    Nothing like pretty graphs and pie charts to invoke Guido’s interest!

    • 6
      Addendum / a says:

      Nothing like pretty (sic) tarts and finger-in-pie farts to invoke Noo£ieBore self-interests!

    • 7
      Joe E Biden, VP of the greatest empire anywhere says:

      And yet we’re free to discuss nightjars but not nightingstorms.

      • 294
        the savant says:

        way above even the savant s head i m afraid ..
        please explain for the retards among us i e probably only me !!

  5. 5
    annette curton says:

    Spells out that tax and spend + crushing debt is not the solution. Obama looking more and more like an over the pond Gordon Brown.

  6. 10
    wavygravy says:

    Presumably brother Barry is going to be Secretary of State

    • 298
      the savant says:

      yeah .. with HILLY BILLIE as the roving dancing queen —- a bit of a demotion from sec of state but hey … gotta eat some spinach in this life …. ask monica.

  7. 11
    Liarpoliticians says:

    You’re wrong, the running mate will be an amoeba ( ) … so he won’t be upstaged by more intelligence, and has as much economic competence as an amoeba (which by pure coincidence is the same as Obama has in economic competence).

    • 34
      Gordon Brown says:

      I must be honest – which for me is a rarity – but when I got playful in the White House Kitchen, – I felt for one moment only – that here was a kindred spirit in many ways – but as it turned out, in my economic policies only.

      Oh well, – the relationship that dare not speak its name could have been cemented behind the saucepan racks.

  8. 14
    Backwoodsman says:

    Can we swap CMD for Ryan ?
    The bbc bed wetters aren’t going to enjoy this dose of reality threatening their love affair wth the obamasiah.

  9. 15
    • 19
      annette curton says:

      And an irritating dwarf is?.

    • 219
      Expat Geordie says:

      She had plenty of them in her student days.

      • 318
        I wouldnt chuck either out of bed on a cold night says:

        To be fair she had plenty of men so chances are some would be tories. There must have been some traffic through those doors for the carpet to get that worn.

  10. 17
    Bob Double Diamond says:

    Yes yes cut tax cut spending and we will all be RICHHHH. None of us wants to work three months of the year for the state BUT you need to do more than just cut taxes and spending if the net result is that you then let corporations rob you blind. Why do you think the US right wing is sponsored by big business. Do you think it is because they ideologically believe in ‘free’ enterprise, individual entrepreneurship? Bollocks no they know that as you cut public spending you increase (in an unregulated market) the opportunities for enormous profits. So for example cut our bloated, inefficient NHS and replace it with US style health business and what will we get – a small increase in out tax bill and a massive increase in what we will need to spend on health insurance to get a worse service. And so it goes with BR, British Gas.

    • 31 says:

      And you think you can get efficiency and growth by not competing and by not incentivising people to work? Which parallel universe are you from? The one where the USSR never existed? The one where the unions didn’t hold the country to ransom for decades in the UK and cause the loss of millions of jobs, that went to countries with people who were prepared to work for a living?

      • 87
        Halitosis says:

        The incentive for work in the NHS is to help people, not make a quick buck out of it. Remember that when you’re having your prolapse sorted.

      • 177
        Bob Double Diamond says:

        Next you are going to tell me you get efficiency and growth by paying minimum wage, importing cheap labour and allowing corporations to take their profits overseas to avoid tax I suppose?

      • 229
        Expat Geordie says:

        He is sort of right. How is it that the US spends double the percentage of its GDP on health that we do, yet a fifth of its population has no health cover? However, how many Americans die in hospital because a nurse can’t be arsed to give them a drink, and how many American hospitals have waiting lists stretching into months?

        How much money is wasted in both systems – I’m specifically thinking of the heart transplant that my dad had in 1995, which cost the NHS £28,000, yet at the time cost on average $250,000 in America.

        I think that in both cases it is possible to reduce costs and improve efficiency. There must be elements of both systems that can be used to provide a decent, cost effective health system that covers everyone.

    • 64
      Blusea socialist says:

      So buddy how many dollars did Mr Ob give to General Motors in bail out funds and how do you think so many of GM workers are attending lympics?

    • 136
      Four-eyed English Genius says:

      On three months income for the state? In the UK. matey, it is more like six months! If you think that is a good idea, I worry about your sanity.

      • 483
        UKIP if you want says:

        Only 3 months for bankers. With a good accountant HMG will pay you to work here

    • 180
      AC1 says:

      Yes yes punish people for working, employing and investing and we will all be WEALTHY!!!!

      /Socialist insanity*

      *A tautology.

    • 302
      the savant says:


      when you say we ll

      all be RICHHHHH…

      are you referring to your ex colleague


  11. 18
    PETER MANGLEDBUM (Lord of the Rings) says:

    Lets hope that he has an IQ of more than 5

  12. 20
    Bob Double Diamond says:

    That last line should of course read “a small decrease in out tax bill and a massive increase in what we will need to spend on health insurance to get a worse service. And so it goes with BR, British Gas.”

  13. 21
    A Pensioner says:

    Hiddeously white.

  14. 24
    The BBC Cheerleaders for Obama says:

    We’re supporting the “Chosen One”……and as soon as the Olympics are finished wewill be transferring the 500 staff being utilised on reporting that event to covering Pres. Obama’s Campaign and triumphant re-election to the White House.

    There will be wall-to-wall coverage to the exclusion of all other news(especially anything relating to the UK)until after the election as we feel that this is what the British viewing public will want…….

  15. 29
    Playful says:

    tory boy Coe waved to the olympic crowd yesterday – he heard them calling his name – C-UNT COE C-UNT COE – he really is a C-UNT – even thinks he can help the Brazilians organise a festival …… what a fucking patronising bastard he is

    • 41
      You are Steve Ovett and I claim my A$50 says:

      Well considering that even Pele seriously doubts that the Brazilians will be able to complete the Olympic venues in time for 2016 or stage such a successful Olympics as London2012 he’s probably right

      • 68
        a non says:

        Don’t forget they have a practice run with a football world cup in 2014 to view potential problems and try to avoid repeating any mistakes

      • 121
        ooer says:

        does he think they’ll have erection problems?

    • 150
      Anonymous says:

      Credit where it is due old boy; Coe was instrumental in securing the games and making them a success. Comes across as a reasonable type to me.

      • 485
        UKIP if you want says:

        Now that I see it has been a “success” – all £9nb of it – I think I’ll try to get some tickets for Monday’s events.

    • 164
      The canine's testes says:

      Altho’ denied I think that “Coe” is very close to “Cohen” (His hooter is big and bent enough!)

  16. 35
    Raving Loon says:

    Rand Paul would have been a better choice.

  17. 40
    Dave (band waggon) Camoron Boris Johnsons predecessor says:

    I will now make competitive sports compusory in primary schools

    • 44
      annette curton says:

      Dreaming, but wouldn’t it be nice if they all just fucked off and left people to do their own thing.

      • 55
        Another "Big Society" failure is imminent I can feel it in my water now says:

        It’s never gonna happen..the teaching unions are against and how are they gonna get supervision for matches after school and at weekendss or “away” fixtures ? Unless “Dave” has a “cunning plan” to bring in unpaid volunteers as” Sports Supervisors” from outside teaching profession

        • 62
          The tit in no. 10 says:

          My pals at Good4Shit have got it covered. They promised.

        • 66
          Blusea socialist says:

          Of course a real free enterprise political party would privatise all schools and we would not have to listen to lefties moaning about non state schools performing to such a high standard in all features of their kids education

        • 154
          Anonymous says:

          Not to mention criminal record checks, insurance requirements, certification for this-that-and-the-other and myriad other obstacles to impede anybody wishing to help the effect of which will be to put of ordinary people with lives to lead.

        • 289
          CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

          How about employing those military P.T. instructors being made redundant by Hammond?

      • 56
        Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

        Credit where credit is due. Bonkers proposal for a minimum 38D cup size in womens beach volleyball will achieve mass support (although I understand Bonkers also wants to outlaw the use of any form of support).

      • 307
        the savant says:


        women are not supposed to swear it s not considered ladylike

        in the same wAy that women do not swaet after lovemaking or similar exertions

        they just glow

        whereas men profusely

        sweat like pigs and probably have heart attack

        • 545
          A typical bloke says:

          “women do not swaet after lovemaking”

          Don’t they? I can’t say I’ve ever noticed, as I typically fall asleep about 30 seconds after orgasm.

    • 270
      Winebar says:

      It doesn’t matter what you say you are going to do, the problem lies with the PE teachers: thick as hell and set in their ways, they put at least half of every cohort off games of any type.

      Children, especially in the early teens should be introduced to sports in groups with only about 6 months’ age difference between them but schoools are too lazy to do that and have kids with vast developmental disparities all learning unfmiliar sports at the same time and place: a recipe for alienating many kids from sports – and entrenching a feeling of failure in at least half the pupils while denying them an apportunity to learn about leadership and achievement in a structured way.

    • 334
      growth now... says:

      how about some cheap excrcise machines in the local public parks…Mr Cam.

      • 457
        Labouriety of the older type says:

        Got them already. They are called fields and can be used freely for running around and jumping up and down – not to mention the odd game of kicking a ball about, or bashing a shuttlecock or tennis ball. No imagination in the yoof of today….

  18. 42
    FIDO Met Police dog says:

    Me , I couldn’t out sniff my own arse !

  19. 43
    FIDO Met Police dog says:

    Should have read

    ME ! i couldn’t sniff out my own arse

    • 61
      But says:

      1. could you tell a Met Police Officer’s arse from his elbow?

      2. could he?

      • 290
        CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

        How many coppers does it take to break an egg?

        None. It fell down the stairs.

    • 63
      In defence of police sniffer dogs says:

      Just to throw in an extenuating circumstance…the properties in the row at New Addington apparently only had partial dividing walls in their roof spaces so essentially if you had access to the loft of one property you had access to the roof spaces of all properties in the block so if you were a devious scumbag who say was wishing to hide the body of the young girl you had allegedly murdered you could perhaps stow it in your neighbour’s roof space whilst a seach of your property was underway and also confuse the dog who would not necessarily pick up the secnt unless it was shoved through the loft hatch and even then probably not

      • 76
        Anonymous says:

        I’m not usually given to this sort of thing but this case has upset me.

        • 91
          In defence of police sniffer dogs says:

          Joking aside…it IS upsetting as I think of my own daughter when she was that age thankfully she was growing up in less troubled late 80′s To me it was pretty obvious that this bloke was a bit iffy from day one as many many people commented on news sites whilst they were still allowing comments.(but suspecting and hard evidence are two different things)the …..the way he changed his story presumably when he suddenly realised that CCTV was usual on buses/trams and that he would have been sighted at some point either with Tia or alone if he walked her down to bus-stop presumably to steer police away from house by saying she’d left as he’d walked her down there and then he was doing the “vacuuming” ..yeah sure he was “vacuuming” up the evidence no doubt and how he was putting on the big “grandfather” act at the outset and kept digging himself a bloody great hole everytime he protested his innoncence etc…for me the absolute clincher that she had come to grief was the mobile phone…no respecting 12 year old goes anywhere these days without their mobile phone whether they are purportedly “street-wise” or not…let’s hope that the forensic can nail the bastard

      • 79
        Ah! Monika says:

        Don’t forget that the lofts of these properties are continuous. . The problem was finding the correct dead body.

        • 116
          Ah! Monika says:

          Continuous. The word I was looking for was interconnected.

        • 376
          Fucking uni wankers running the Met says:

          So are you saying that the Police didnt realise that these loft spaces were in fact shared ? Even though it appears to be common knowledge as you testify to ?

          • The Paragnostic says:

            You wouldn’t find a well paid copper living on a shithole estate like that, would you?

      • 122
        nah, they're thick says:

        so, that would stop the cops from searching them all?

        • 156
          Anonymous says:

          Are you saying you can get into the loft, nip along a few yards and come out next door if they haven’t got the hatch bolted from the inside? Can’t be very safe in a fire.

          • It was a different world then........... says:

            Standard build with these types of property…..I remember as a 11year old living in my parents semi in late 50′s early 60′s….there was a loft hatch in my bedroom where ifyou entered the loft as a kid(or small person) you could squeeze round the cold water tank on the dividing wall There was a two to three foot gap to the eaves where the shared party wall was, stand on a pre-placed tea chest etc and clamber over into the next doors property where my mate lived and then go down the loft hatch into his bedroom….we used to do it quite often to avoid going outside and to avoid our Mums especially if one of them was out. Our respective Mums knew all about it but were unconcerned….but it was the late 50′s early 60′s…these days I would want the wall to be bricked up or a stout lock on the loft hatch but of course that wouldn’t stop someone loft hopping in a row of terraces like this and placing stuff in or taking stuff out of your loft

      • 183
        AC1 says:

        The police knew who it was from the moment the poor girl went missing.

        They were almost waiting for this to happen.

        Lock up p43d0s, and don’t let them out, EVER!

        • 379
          Fucking uni wankers running the Met says:

          More to the point , the stupid useless Hunts appear to have lost the scumbag whilst having him under survielance.

  20. 45
    It's OK to rob the dead. says:

    Don’t you just love it when billionaires offer financial solutions that cut pensions for pensioners?

    It’s a skill worthy of Olympic status that leaves billionaires financially better off during this process.

  21. 47
    Sunny says:
  22. 48
    hughffish says:

    In a noisy room, ‘RYAN, Paul’ sounds a lot like ‘RON PAUL’ – it’s all been a hideous misunderstanding.

  23. 49
    Anonymous says:

    Congressman Paul Ryan was allegedly only nominated as all the chimpanzees in the local zoo declined the offer!!

  24. 51
    tommy5d says:

    Hmm, I wanted to like this guy but his video was bollocks.

    1. He says that debt will reach “100% of the economy” by 2020. I assume he means GDP by economy? And if so America’s debt crossed the 100% of GDP threshold last year before he released this video.

    2. He takes the increases the increase in government spending over the recession and extrapolates it until 2050. What sort of nonsense measure is that? I don’t think anyone’s ever denied that there will need to be cuts but the response needs to be across all government, including the military, not just in healthcare.

    • 159
      Jimmy. says:

      “He takes the increases the increase in government spending over the recession and extrapolates it until 2050.”

      Romney has his Palin.

      Welcome to rightieworld.

      • 199
        Trahison des Clercs says:

        Let your Aeneas take the strain Jimbo. Mark or Mandy ready to give you a fundamental change of view.

      • 297
        Anonymous says:

        Except it wasn’t Palin who actually helped to get us in this fucking mess though was it Jimmy? It was a thick, jock socialist twat called Gordon Brown

        • 383
          What the stupid thick as fuck bigots on here fail to see says:

          Aided and abetted by a fucking cast of English fuckwits such as English Ed Balls, English Ed Milliband, English Harriet Harman, English David Blunket, English John Prescott, English Jack Straw, English Alistair Campbell, English Liam Byrne, English David Milliband,English Margaret Becket, English Stephen Byres, English Alan Millburn, English Geoff Hoon, English Clare Short,English Charles Clarke,English Jaqui Smith, fucking English Margaret Moran, English Hazel Blears,English Alan Johnstone, English Hilliary Benn, English Andy Burnham, English Sean Fucking Woodward, English John Denham, English Baroness- oh the irony- Scotland, English Nick Brown , English Tom fucking Watson !!!!! Fucking English !

          • Fog says:

            Blair – born in Edinburgh (Alistair Campbell??)
            Gordon Brown
            George Robertson
            John Reid
            Alexander Irvine

            Douglas Alexander
            Jim Murphy

          • Fog says:

            Alistair Darling

          • Whats your point Fog ? says:

            Campbell is a Yorkshire man. Darling was born in London even so you managed to name about half a dozen Scots who made up around 25% of the Labour Government the vast majority 75% of whom where English. Funny nobody mentions that on here but then again it would seriously head fuck your bigoted world view.

  25. 53
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    Pretty stupid analysis. Romney has picked a northerner from a state Obama won easily in 2008 and with only a moderate number of college votes. So Ryan will not help him either win a big state or shift his appeal to a different demographic. Ryan is also best known for budget proposals to cut food stamps and medicare for the poor whilst vastly increasing the defence budget (the so-called ‘balanced budget except defence’ option). Whilst this may appeal to the tea party it is the independents and wavering democrats he needs to win – and they hate his line. Finally, he is regarded as a patrician, born with family benefits – something which, just like Romney, distances him from winning the votes of mainstream voters.

    It really is difficult to think of an option Romney could have picked that would have more appeal to the Obama camp. The only thing Ryan has going for him is that there seem to be no sex scandals – but even there he is a catholic and can be easily embarrassed by putting him on the spot as to what he would do about the Bishop scandals.

    Guess it is another 4 years of foreign asset stripping by Obama.

    • 59
      HenryV says:

      The best thing that could happen for the American right is another 4 years of Barry. As a lame duck he will be free to push stuff that will run against the grain of the American majority. And then there is the situation on the US southern border which is steadily getting worse. I think US troops will still be running around deserts in 2020, but they will be US deserts, and the deaths of soldiers and US civilians will be blamed squarely on Barry.

      • 67
        Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

        Your analysis might hold up if the US republicans had either a coherent platform or a leader in waiting. Their problem is that their leaders all come with baggage (personal scandals, policies that only appeal to their own constituency or personalities that would make an evangelist sex addict look attractive). They could easily pull together a coherent platform based on tackling the US budget – but are unwilling to sacrifice their own pork barrels or address the bloated military. It will take more than 4 years for the republicans to pass these obstacles and become electable, even with Obama. And remember, Hilary is lurking – and William Clinton remains the greatest populist in the US, whatever you think of him.

        • 108
          Well it's a thought says:

          I think the US has been behind us following the same Yellow brick road as we are going down, to I believe some serious problems in a few years.

        • 299
          Tristram Bigbore Twunt says:

          So you think you’re cleverer than the next Vice President of the USA?

          Fuck off nutter!

          • Jimmy. says:

            I suppose that would depend on who Hilary picks.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            Why not? This is the country that brought you Dan Quayle.

          • Tristram Bigbore Twunt says:

            So you think you’re cleverer than Dan Quayle do you?

            Fuck off nutter!

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            My dog is brighter than Quayle. However, I realise that you would be intellectually challenged by Dick Sniffin, leader of the Buggers, Nutters and Perverts. Since you clearly do not like nutters I assume you are a bugger or a pervert.

          • Tristram Bigbore Twunt says:

            You seem to know a lot about all three Mr Bigbore.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            I can certainly recognise one.

        • 342
          HenryV says:

          Republican Party may move a glacial pace, but 4 years is a long time. If Barry’s second term comes apart it will help accelerate the political progress of a possible RP competitor. I sincerely believe Barry get a second bite may result in the Democrats being out of power for 2 to 3 presidential terms.

    • 312
      the savant says:

      i think he should have picked paul ron …

      or should that be ron paul ??

  26. 54
    Global NHS Advert says:

    So is that it then. Twenty billion down the drain and for what?

  27. 57
    Weekend Gardening Tips, - by John of Hull says:

    Now that t’sun is out you want t’garden looking nice so get that kid that poliches yer Jags ter shine up yer plastic nomes looka treat they will shiny in t’sun! 11′s ready yet luv?????

  28. 65
    Seb Coe says:

    I would just like to say that I am sorry the Olympics end this weekend. But believe me when I say that it has been a great success and given the country a real boost. It’s legacy will be huge.

    I am happy to see this esteemed blog got into the spirit and enjoyed the human achievements. A measurable feel good factor.

    • 70
      Seb Coe says:

      PS Thanks for the money, suckers

      • 75
        Seb Coe says:

        Money well spent. Think of the legacy.

      • 82
        Well it's a thought says:

        You did well to get the taxpayer to throw billions your way for this farce, we will be paying it back in taxes and increased prices for all the businesses who jumped on this 2 week piece of trash, fortunately we don’t need to buy the goods from the companies who jumped onto this band wagon but we still have to pay the taxes.

        • 85
          Seb Coe (Lord) says:

          Look, it’s all paid for. On budget and on time. Huge goodwill and many medals.

          Now the country will reap the rewards and can continue to enjoy the sporting facilities. What more could you want?

          • Only 1 days 10 hours 43 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

            Your head on a plate and our money back.

          • Well it's a thought says:

            It seems a bloody awful lot of money to be able to say to the countries of world, yah yah we got more medals than you , the sports seems to have come last, the commerce and medals won first, now the ones that bought tickets should be getting the honour of paying the bills, not the rest of the country being forced to foot them.

          • Well fuck-a-doodle-do says:

            “On budget and on time

            Difficult to blow a £11.2billion budget on a swimming pool and a couple of sandpits.

            And just as well f*cking well it was on time, really, wasn’t it? “Er, we’d like to delay the 2012 Summer Olympics a bit, how about Spring 2013?”

          • Seb Coe (Lord) says:

            Well I think your all missing the point.

            It was on time. And the budget, as you all are aware, money is not an exact science. Subject to fluctuation and unforseen circumstance.

            That said, when you witnessed the opening ceremony, torch tour, sporting success…..what price on that?

            And your children can use world class facilities we built. It’s not about politics, it’s about community and goodwill.

          • Cökehead says:

            It’s all about extortion by mega-corporations.

          • Well it's a thought says:

            You give the impression that these facilities will be free, the country won’t reap the rewards as they are in a shithole part of London and prices will be skyhigh to use and well as safety to life and limb to users, you lost we lost thank fck we won’t have this particular farce again although your paydays and cv will make sure you don’t short of a bob or two.

          • BSE says:

            Easy to be on budget when you keep revising the budget estimate upwards.


            (That’s the Brownian School of Economics)

          • Expat Geordie says:

            World class facilities? My arse. The “facilities” for the olympics in Portland are being turned into a primary school for a load of inbreds who are not allowed to say the word “rabbit”. How many world class sailors are you going to get from a primary school full of retards?

    • 78
      William Hague says:

      Hello Seba! Good to see you here. Ffion is away for a few days so I was wondering if you fancy a judo session? I need to practice that back grapple again.

    • 83
      Donald Mac Я USeless says:

      I went to London but all I got was my Pepsi T-shirt stolen.

  29. 72
    Broken Record Company. says:

    BBC records it’s worst ever Olympic commentaries since 1908.

  30. 74
    Broken Record Company. says:

    BBC records it’s worst ever Olympic commentaries since 1908.

    Amazing, unbelievable , fantastic.

    • 92
      Halitosis says:

      You’ve obviously never watched ITV, Sky – all commentary is like that. Maybe you should form your own unenthusiastic joy-sucking morbid channel.

      • 105
        Well fuck-a-doodle-do says:

        “Look! Look! He’s running around a running track! Unbelievable performance by the runner, there! Look at him run!! (raises voice to a feverish scream) LOOK! RUNNING! A MAN RUNNING! THIS IS TRULY UNBELIEVABLE! WOW!”

        (continues for 2 weeks but thank God it’s almost over. And now the repayments begin. £11.2billion over – what? – 30 years? 40?)

      • 111
        Ah! Monika says:

        You’re right they are just as bad.

        PS I have an Olympic Bronze. You?

      • 155
        Bogeyman says:

        The missus was watching Olympic BMX racing on Channel 5 yesterday. I had to leave the room – not because of the bikes but to prevent my ears being assaulted any further by the oik commentator. He sounded like that bloke who’s been arrested for the Tia murder.

    • 94
      annette curton says:

  31. 86
    Well it's a thought says:

    I suppose now this Olympic farce is nearly over, Libor and it’s minions will be selling off the schools sports fields in the towns where the braindead vote red while blaming the nutter Camoron and making sure children go back to eating burgers and playing with their computers, after all we can’t have winners, will the Lotto money now be doubled back to where it used to be or are they still pocketing it for other sports, or like MPs doling the money out as if it was their own .

  32. 88
    Ed Milibat says:

    We need a judge lead inquiry into why there isn’t a Nandos in Corby

  33. 89
    Anonymous says:

  34. 90
    Helmut Kohl says:

    Serious politics isn’t for you Guido. Stick to getting drunk at lunchtime and the occasional stunt in a chicken suit.

  35. 99
  36. 107
    Theres no money left says:

    Stephen Twigg is demanding to know from David Cameron where the money is to finance extra sports facilities for Schools. Can someone put him in touch with Liam Byrne as his Govetnment had it last !

    • 231
      Hypocrisy of the Left says:

      The cheeky bastard!

    • 243
      Expat Geordie says:

      Possibly from sacking (hanging? we hope) a few nurses who can’t be arsed to make sure that patients are properly hydrated. We have some bloody brilliant surgeons in this country, but they are let down by nurses who can’t be arsed to do their jobs properly. It’s like building the worlds greatest supercar and then having it service by chimps.

      • 319
        the savant says:

        harsh geordie

        some nurses are angels

        if you re a very good boy they select you for nightly benediction

    • 456
      Rat's arse says:

      Is that Twigg fella the one whose always smirking? If so, he’s got a face you could never tire of punching.

      Leiber truly are two-faced ars*h*les.

  37. 110
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Of course, all the chatterati had assumed Romney would choose Marco Rubio, an Hispanic Senator from Florida, based on power and identity politics considerations. (Which tells you how they view the world and what’s important to them.) Willard then ups and picks someone whose mantra up until now has been that you have to reorganise the whole structure of how you finance and run a national government, if you want to have a nation and a government in 50 years. (Sorta like what Romney used to do at Bain Capital– which shows you what’s important to him.)

    Two things are for sure:
    (1) The chatterati will question whether there was any racial subtext to passing over Rubio (although as a descendant of Mexicans of Anglo heritage, what would Mitt hold against Hispanics?)
    (2) No-one will comment on how that growth projection of debt and government spending looks shockingly like another hockey-stick graphic of years gone by (Paging Al Gore…)

    • 114
      Ah! Monika says:

      Bloody Hell. It’s Saturday. Isn’t there a ‘Tay King-dePisse’ Lite?

    • 120

      Ex ante: I admit to nothing, Mr KdP.

      Do I detect any desire to confess on your part?

      • 123
        Ah! Monika says:

        Don’t think my comment has been released from mod-detention yet …harmless.
        To the effect that it’s Sat and drinkies time. Is there a TKTP lite?

        • 126

          Tayside Knowledge Transfer Partnerships?

          No, that is not an acronym. It is an oxymoron, surely.

          • Ah! Monika says:

            To you!
            1 bottle of Sauvignon Blanc down , and a party to go to.
            Why do you have to make me work so hard?

          • It is impossible, repeat impossible, to overwork a brain.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            Cat; you haven’t met many IT or HR directors have you? Walking and talking at the same time produces meltdown.

          • I was talking about using one’s brain, Tristram A/R. At one time I knew the IT director of every major bank in the UK. They probably could have rustled up a brain between them.

            But hey! They weren’t the ones to blame for the meltdown.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            We have probably met many of the same people. I admire the grace and generosity of your assessment of them.

          • Possibly. I am talking 1990 ± 5 years.

            As for HR, forget it! That was the place where anyone who failed elsewhere was put. Never met a good one in four decades.

            Fred the Shed was knocking off the RBS one, Susan Bor, but I won’t mention her by name because there is a superinjunction out there somewhere which we don’t know about. She became an Employee of The Month Too via some metaphysical process according to the law of the Medes and Persians which altereth not. Seedy business, one suspects.

    • 230
      The Paragnostic says:

      The difference between the hockey stick and the debt-spending connection is that there is a demonstrable feedback mechanism that links spending to deficit to debt, something which is lacking in the AGW scam.

      Cutting spending and imposing a sensible flat rate of taxation while closing the loopholes opened over decades for the good of lobby groups is a sensible way forward, but cannot be done with a state weighed down by some notion of social obligation and the waste that that implies.

      • 355
        Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

        Nothing to do with social obligation. As with all US budget issues it all comes down to pork barrel thinking.

    • 321
      the savant says:

      marco rubio ??

      surely he would be looking at someone with ” silkier ” skills

      like marco polo ( geddit )

      • 459
        Holey Poley says:

        Wasn’t he the bloke who first brought the holes to Britain that a certain confectionery company use in their minty sweeties?

  38. 128
    Richard Chutney says:

    A guy is sitting in the bar in departures at a busy airport. A beautiful woman walks in and sits down at the table next to him. He decides because she’s got a uniform on, she’s probably an off-duty flight attendant. So he decides to have a go at picking her up by identifying the airline she flies for, thereby impressing her greatly.
    He leans across to her and says the Delta Airlines motto ‘We love to fly and it shows’.
    The woman looks at him blankly. He sits back and thinks up another line.
    He leans forward again and delivers the Air France motto ‘Winning the hearts of the world’.
    Again she just stares at him with a slightly puzzled look on her face.
    Undeterred, he tries again, this time saying the Malaysian Airlines motto ‘Going beyond expectations’.
    The woman looks at him sternly and says ‘What the fu # k do you want?’
    ‘Ah!’ he says, sitting back with a smile on his face. ‘Ryanair’

  39. 131
    Condoleeza Rice says:

    Mitt Romney is a shit not choosing me as his running mate.

    The bastard.

  40. 135
    If We Are Being Honest says:

    The Repubs don’t want to win it.

    Rubio would of sealed Obama’s fate.

    I’d watch out for that Rubio in the future, he could be a presidential candidate, next time around.

    Will be funny to see the powers behind the curtain try and spin the war with Iran they are desperate for if Obama gets back in though.

  41. 139
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    Oh how I am so looking forward to the Olympics opening ceremony tomorrow.

    It’s going to be wild !

  42. 142
    Anonymous says:

    Is it in the constitution that the VP has to be a bog-trotter or a left-footer?

  43. 143
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    A rerun of Palin, clearly. Obama will be re-elected so it hardly matters which nut in the pay of the bankers is chosen as Romney’s running mate.

  44. 144
    Jeremy Clarkson says:

    Bradley Wiggins has got a lot to answer for, there’s fucking bikes everywhere today.

    • 152
      A cyclist says:

      Where do we pick up our gongs ?

    • 165
      a non says:

      F*cking bikes? Something to do with your monthly cycle perhaps?

      • 178
        Ah! Monika says:

        Get rid of them.

      • 262
        recycled quotes says:

        Ahhhh,! A cyclist I presume…….

        Clarksons highway code on cyclists: ‘trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong’

        “I was reading The Mirror the other day and came across a letter from a reader who wrote, ‘I was riding my bike to work when this red Ferrari pulled up next to me. Out of the window, Jeremy Clarkson shouted ‘Get a car’, and drove off.’ What I actually said was, ‘Get a car you hatchet faced, leaf-eating tw*t ”

        Read more:

        • 327
          the savant says:

          right on

          someone please tell me what particular level of cretinous moronic imbecility does one have to attain before believing implicitly that it is one s god given right to cycle on the pavement and mow down the old the ill and the infirm.

          • Ploding along on the trough of a wave says:

            In around 1960ish I got shouted at in Tooting by a plod for riding my bike on the pavement. I was doing my early morning (6am) paper round at the time and I was the only person in that street apart from him. I wonder if he wrote that up as “gave a severe warning to a malfeasant paper boy…”

            Plus ca change…

    • 246
      Ann Dunham says:

      Shouldn’t one blame the bikes and not Wiggins?

  45. 145
    Aunty Matter says:

    You are joking? The Mu$l1m Kenyan has got this election in the bag. Romney makes Cam-moron look like a fucking genius

    • 153
      WVM says:

      You’re probably right Aunty Matter but I find it just so unfuckingbelievable!
      I mean, what part of ‘BROKE’ don’t these Americans understand?

      • 157
        Aunty Matter says:

        The ones who keep getting free handouts “Obama money”

        • 162
          a non says:

          [Small] Change you can believe in!

        • 203
          Tay King-dePisse says:

          But that segment aired on FOX News, so it doesn’t count. FOX News lies. To paraphrase the novelist and literary critic Mary McCarthy (who said it about Lillian Hellman): Everything they say is a lie, including “and” and “the”. (I credited my source, which is more than Fareed Zakaria of CNN/Time, or our old mate Johann Hari, do.) FOX News is Murdoch, Murdoch is evil, hence nothing FOX News says could ever be the fact of the matter. FOX News once reported that it gets dark at night. I refused to believe them– FOX News lies!

        • 218
          Raving Loon says:

          This is how all democracies commit suicide.

          • Let's play gerise! says:

            I have just noted from today’s paper that Fareed has ben barred by all his employers for plagiarism. No wonder his progs and articles were so informed!

    • 188
      AC1 says:

      Wow. He’s must be stupid compared to that Kenyan. Just look at Zero’s educational records!

      What do you mean they’re a secret?

      Why wasn’t the public told this?

  46. 146
    Sun says:

    One for the watermelons.

  47. 158
    Anonymous says:

    Shames his sums don’t add up, and when he’s finished cutting taxes for billionaires there’s a 4.6 TRILLION DOLLAR hole in his budget.

    Yep, Obama should have no problem making fun of that.


    • 189
      AC1 says:

      % Tax cuts = more work = more tax.

      It’s so simple only a marxist couldn’t understand it.

      • 198
        Anonymous says:

        What like those Reagan and Bush tax cuts?

        Of course, those two both ran massive deficits and added to the government debt and Clinton managed to run surpluses despite his taxes.

        There’s really NOTHING worse than faux deficit hawks who pretend to care about the economy, and then make things much worse by giving money away to billionaires.

        30 years of voodoo economics and failure, ‘trickle down’ has never worked and has been utterly blown out of the water, but who knows, maybe this time will be different…

        • 207
          Trahison des Clercs says:

          Cigar Man was responsible for the Housing bubble, he was not f*cking genius Onanymong;

  48. 160
    lagwolf says:

    Inspired choice by Romney and probably the best thing he has done yet in this campaign.

    • 167
      David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:


      Mitt Romney would have been well advised to have selected Louise Mensch as his running Mate.

      It’s all over,Obama will be re-elected later this year.

    • 190
      AC1 says:

      His best choice was to have Obama as an opponent. Zero’s campaign seems to be imploding already, and shooting him in the foot.

    • 214
      Raving Loon says:

      I wish he had picked Ron or Rand Paul.

  49. 161
  50. 168
    David Cameron says:

    Mitt Romney ” Join me in welcoming the next President of the United States, Paul Ryan ” !!!!!!!!

    And I thought I was a Tory twerp, but Mitt Romney is a class act for American Idiot of the century.

  51. 170
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    I would like to wish Mitt Romney the very best of luck in the Presidential elections.

    And now for my next gag !

  52. 173
    Ah! Monika says:

    Romney picks Ryan
    Brown picks his nose.

  53. 186
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    I would like to wish Louise Mensch the very best of luck in her new post as Campaign Director for “Romney/Ryan 2012″.

  54. 192
    LabourLast says:
  55. 194
  56. 201
    Aunty Matter says:

    Ha ha I love the BBC, already taking the piss out of Romney for calling Ryan the next PRESIDENT of the USA, well perhaps Romney is right, but funny the BBC don’t find Obama’s gaffs funny.

    How many states in the USA again Barry?

  57. 206

    Timeo Danaos et dona ferentes: that nice couple we met in Portugal

    Courtesy of David Mellor, Emeritus Professor of Cambridge University. He was the main opponent of the conferment of an honorary degree to the French philosopher Jacques Derrida. For this he deserves an earldom at the very least.

    • 211
      Ah! Monika says:

      Tut! Cat ‘of’ = ‘at’
      Edukation etc.

      PS Tut Cat is not a reference to Tutankhamen.

      • 225

        Now you have turned to Nazism of a false trollcattery kind.

        of Cambridge University is a widely accepted way in (and out) of academia of linking a person with an establishment.

        He is definitely not at Cambridge any more. The clue is in the word Emeritus.

  58. 213
    Raving Loon says:

    He should have picked Rand Paul.

  59. 220
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    As long as we’re on the subject of Septics and propensity for “gaffes,” let’s all have a little too much fun watching these tourists attempt to negotiate the names of London landmarks:
    And turnabout being fair play, the next time any of us go to New York, it’s “Howe-ston” Street, not “Yoo-ston” or “Hoo-ston” Street” (Houston Street, the boundary of Greenwich Village and SoHo). Don’t ask me why, ‘coz I don’t know. Just don’t end up looking like you just got off the plane, is what I’m saying, whoever and wherever you are.

    • 235

      C’mon Mr KdP

      Last time I was in Illinois, I filled with gas and the rather sexy cashier said I do like your accent!

      I replied, in a humorous tone, I have not got an accent, you have!

      When I arrived home, I discovered that the same garage had debited my credit card five times over as many weeks for different amounts! I did not loose as the card company sorted it with a request for the customer’s signature…

      • 295
        Tay King-dePisse says:

        Somewhere in this recherche du temps perdu was a point, I gather, and I must admit that it’s lost on me. Is it that Americans are not as stupid as they app*ear to some– that they are capable of pulling off credit/debit card fraud with the best of ‘em? Or is it that a British visitor was able to be taken for a mug because he let his guard down around a sexy girl? Actually, the accent is the least of it. Most people find a regional accent that is not impenetrably thick to be, if nothing else, quaint, if not downright endearing, if the person using it is also fairly personable. My point was that even American tourists in New York might be similarly tripped up; and if you’re British, it would count somewhat in your favour if it seemed you knew your way around in New York at least well enough to know local pronunciation and vocabulary, i.e., that you might have lived there at one time, so that, should you meet up with some sharpster, primarily of the cabdriving variety (admittedly a lot fewer than is made out, and most of them are immigrants now), they may wish to rethink their choice of mark. The same can be said of London, of course. No American should have ever asked where Gross Veener Square is, on pain of horsewhipping: “Hey, looka me- I’m a real hick!”

        • 328

          Propensity for gaffes and two-countries-divided-by-the-same-language was your theme, I believe.

          I was attempting to indicate that these considerations could combine in other ways to produce different unintended consequences. Your video would not play for me but since it was entitled British words that stump Americans and you were demonstrating the turnabout, I can probably image its content without having to view it.

          My renowned sexual instability (or if you might prefer, appreciation for the female form, treat the same) had no part to play in repeated acts of fraud which occurred most probably because I was seen to be an outsider.

          I was going to tell another earlier anecdote about being in a restaurant in California and asking for a glass of water. They looked at me in astonishment and a succession of waitresses and cooks came out to try and decipher what on earth I was talking about. After what seemed an age, someone cottoned on and a glass of waarrer duly arrived at my table. I was going to tell that story – but won’t now.

          • Tay King-dePisse says:

            Sorry about the link– it was American reporters asking fellow American visitors to the Olympics to read certain addresses: “Lye-Chester Square”, “Traffle-garr Square”, and the like, were the attempts made. (They came close on “Tottenham Court Road”.) The idea was that it was Yanks “giving the business” to other Yanks for not knowing the pronunciations. (Of course, anyone who DID get it right wouldn’t have been shown.) In California, though, “un vaso de agua” would probably be better understood in any event, considering who many of the restaurant workers are, unless you were in Berkeley (“Burklee” not “Barklee”), where “a vitreous liquid-containment-capable implement with a servingly-optimal volume of H2O” might have been the preferable local usage amongst moonlighting science students.

          • No need to apologise. Video exactly as anticipated.

            I actually like your style…mostly. ;-)

            (Subscript 2 might have been nice, but that is really nit-picking…)

          • Tay King-dePisse says:

            Subscripts, he wants!
            I can’t be arsed to learn how to do that sort of nonsense, SCat. Life’s too short.
            Back at ya on the style, hoss…mostly. No “smiley,” I’m not one of those “people” (1970′s spy novel reference, for the youngsters in the audience). Same reason as subscripts.
            Now watch me as I do my Samuel Pepys impression: “And so to bed.”


            G’night friend. It will be lighter in the morning.

            *thinks: a bit of tuition and he could be unbeatable*


            :-) :-) :-) :-)

        • 462
          Accenchewate the pozitiv says:

          “…Most people find a regional accent that is not impenetrably thick to be, if nothing else, quaint, if not downright endearing”.

          Ha ha. Have you heard some of the Scottie accents on the BBC world service and tv? English is my first language, and over the years I have worked alongside several folk from north of the border, but I struggle to understand some of these presenters/news-readers. Goodness knows what foreigners make of them as they try to decypher the Glasgobabble.

          • Pip pip says:

            Sorry Nigel can you say that again I struggle with your plummy accent have you got bools in your mouth? Toddle of now Im sure you must have a morris dancing lesson to attend.

        • 536
          Mad! quite mad! says:

          To all those cockney prats who drink in the Lord Tredegar, Bow, E3 – it’s pronounced Tr’d-EAGER not TREAD-ugger. My mother was born in that picturesque little town on the Sirhowy and the Tredegars, who developed the area in the 1840′s lived in Tredegar House in Newport where everyone pronounces it correctly – so why can’t you?

    • 244

      eponymouly should have been eponymously

      loose should have been lose

      *Before Obersturmbannführer Ah! Monika spots them*

  60. 234
    Mo Farrah says:

    The unanimous choice of the athletes for the person to carry our flag at the closing Olympics ceremony is none other than David Cameron.

    This will give the spectators a chance to boo and jeer at the worst Prime Minister this country has had in living memory.

    • 241
      Tony Bliar says:

      Yup. Because I only lied through my teeth in order to start a war that killed more than 100,000 civilians, so I’m obviously fab.

      Want me back? Go on! We can núke Iran.

      • 251
        Tomorrow's Chip Wrapper says:

        Brown was just an incompetent fantasist whereas Bliar could sell snow to eskimoes(sorry must be PC..inuit)and in my book that’s a lot worse

      • 399
        Blowing Whistles says:

        Any National Newspaper or journalist or Media outlet who ‘still talk up blair’ for example Simon Heffer – needs to be very, very careful from here on out. “ITS OVER”.

        Blair – ought to have been charged with several criminal offences – ‘before’ he even became an MP …. who was lent on and who were the controllers who massaged his career along?

        Blair is the walking dead, along with the legions who ‘still prop him up’. AND they are all out-numbered by the public masses.

    • 247
      Gordon Brown says:

      And i destroyed our economy and banking system,aswell as selling our gold reserves at a rock bottom price.
      Also i eat bogies on live television.

      • 250
        Tony Bliar says:

        And you increased by 100% the rate of income tax levied on the lowest-paid workers whilst simultaneously introducing a whole host of tax loopholes for the rich.

        BUT.. I opened the immigration floodgates, which reduced job opportunities for British workers, and pretty much crushed their hopes of getting pay-rises.

        And I wrecked the state education system, so the qualifications it hands out are worthless. Totally buggering a whole generation.

        So I’m still worse than you!

        (And considerably richer.)

        • 253
          The BBC editing the news for YOU says:

          Your government also sold off 200 schools playing fields but we won’t mention that as we’re too busy castigating Cameron for selling off 21

        • 256
          Gordon Brown says:

          Yes but i fucked over eveyone(apart from public sector workers)that had saved for their retirement.

          • Tony Bliar says:

            Yes, but I appointed you as Chancellor.

            And failed to sack you, even when it was obvious you were stark staring mad.

          • Gordon Brown says:

            Yes but i usurped you and went on to be a global embarrassment to my fellow Brits.

          • Tony Bliar says:

            Yes, but I promised an ethical foreign policy and then lied through my teeth to start a war! I killed 100,000 civilians, damn you!

            OK, they were foreign, but I reckon it still beats your destruction of the private pensions industry, reducing retirees (other than public sector ones, natch) to penury.

          • Gordon Brown says:

            Don’t forget a gave you a limitless budget for your killing spree.

          • sick of everything, ever says:

            Get a room, FFS.

          • Tony B£air says:

            I have hundreds of rooms already…but i suppose you can never own enough property!

    • 248
      Tomorrow's Chip Wrapper says:

      C’mon get real……Brown takes the gold for worst PM this century….he beats “Dave” hands down

    • 252
      Backwoodsman says:

      WTF ?? How stupid would you have to be , for it to even cross your mind for a nano second, that cameron is in the same league as blair and brown when it comes to causing damage to the country.

      • 258
        David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

        For heavens sake lads let’s get real.

        Under the Tories the UK debt has increased from £883 billion last year to £1trillion this year.

        This is marvellous news for our economy,and dwarfs Gordon Brown’s economics.

        You ain’t seen nothing yet from the Conservatives.

        • 261
          Tomorrow's Chip Wrapper says:

          I shudder to think how the BBC and Guardian would react if the Conservatives were actually making any actual REAL cuts rather than the half-arsed attempts they’re actually doing

        • 263
          Snotty McMental says:

          Yes, and what was the national debt when I became Chancellor?

          About £230billion? So, we start with £230billion, the world has the longest period of economic growth in its history, tax revenues in the UK were higher than ever before, and after 13 years of this growth, and 13 years of this abundance of tax revenue, the debt rose fourfold to just under £1trillion, if you ignore PPI and state pensions (which would obviously make it a hell of a lot higher).

          Am I not a genius?

        • 265
          Ed Ballsup says:

          “Under the Tories the UK debt has increased from £883 billion last year to £1trillion this year.”

          Amateurs! My plan is to increase the debt far more, far faster.

        • 323
          smoggie says:

          It has increased because we can’t cover the interest payments. Brown is a fucker.

    • 266
      Gordon Brown says:

      I’ve just beaten Sarah up.

  61. 249
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    I have just binned my copy of “Atlas Shrugged” by Ayn Rand.

    Just can’t my head around it after reading the first page.

    Give me “The Beano ” or “Dandy” any day.

    • 255
      retardEd Miliband (leader of the party that started a war that killed 100,000 civilians) says:

      I prefer to look at my blank sheet of paper.

    • 259
      Mrs T was the only real man in the Tory Party says:

      If you think that THE present party Dave leads is actually anywhere near being “The Nasty Party” then you really ARE deluded………..he and his gang are a load of softies…if you ereally wnat to proper Tory policies you need a majority Tory government…that would make your balls shrink…you’d really see how masrty they could be then..

    • 269
      annette curton says:

      Dave should get some serious reading material, I recommend Beyond the Crash the sequel is even better…Invisible Man.

    • 287
      Dippy McRuin says:

      What about my book?

  62. 271
    Gordo McBroon says:

    Nurse! My panty liner smells of wee wee.

  63. 272
    robbie says:

    However good Ryan is, and I’ve never heard of him, he won’t save Romney who is absolutely DIRE.

    • 282
      Apple Pie says:

    • 283
      Apple Pie says:

    • 305
      Vote for the clones says:

      Doesn’t matter which joker’s selected, the vested inetersts that run America – domestic and foriegn, financial and political – call all the shots.

      As some dead comedian or other said – it’s a club and you aint in it.

      • 466 says:

        Isn’t it the same in every country? Why single out the USA? At east they don’t have foreigners running their country as we do.

  64. 279

    I don’t know why they make it so difficult for themselves. They are a reserve currency. The reserve currency. All that they need to do is print the money, to be used solely to repay the debt/interest thereon, ensure that the pot is not dipped into for anything else (to avoid hyperinflation etc). With no debts to repay out of budget the job is a good un. OK need to consider exchange rates, but with all that oil tapped up etc they could manage.

    Spending the next century paying of debts on such a scale is simply a fool’s paradise. There are better more socially responsible options. We are in unusual times so unusual solutions are required. They are not exactly going to have the bailiffs turn up and take the White House away are they?

    With a balanced budget at a keystroke, they could get on with what matters, and that is not worrying about debts. Banks and investors repaid in full they could spend their way to heaven in the luxury markets while having pots of cash to invest in the global economic recovery.


  65. 291
    Too ot to play golf says:

    SEB COE? Is there a reason on here why so many dislike him? I know little about him other than recalling his elegant running. He seems to have handled the Olympics very well – however much I may dislike the awful dumbing down of everything British from the monarchy to the BBC. And dislike the demand that my applause for excellence in the performance of their sweaty hobbies is insufficient and that my adulation is required for the inarticulate products of inner city gyms. Yep, Seb may grate on me because he appears overly smug but, really, are there reasons of which I am unaware to highlight him from any other of our self serving great and good?

  66. 306
    Aunty Matter says:

    Romney might be a Ming, but when it comes to fuck ups, the BBC should check this twat out

  67. 311
    Gordon Brown says:

    My middle name is Violet Hairy Minge.

  68. 320
    Brown out and pay me damages says:

    He is not going to win!

  69. 324
    Edinburgh can go and fuck itself up its socialist shithole says:


  70. 329
    Moussa Koussa's pet hamster says:

    It beggars belief that the Americans would elect such a Neocon idiot as Romney to be their president. Like him or not, Obama knows how to perform on the international stage – Romney couldn’t even make a short visit to Europe without showing what an idiot he is.
    Don’t do it America.

  71. 330
    slo-mo sniper says:

    MO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  72. 348
    LibLabCon = All the fucking same says:

    Can’t see that video lasting much longer.

    • 446
      Ali G interviews Nick Griffin says:

      Surprised to say the least, but it won’t be hear by the morn.

  73. 350
    Moussa Koussa's pet hamster says:

    Over here in Wales we do have the luxury of voting for Plaid Cymru.

    • 382
      Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

      Are the mushrooms up yet, dear?

      • 392
        Ivy Baton-Round says:

        Rhayader, August 1983 was a lovely trip wasn’t it, Elsie? Remember? You thought you’d weed yourself in the pub?

        • 400
          Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

          Yes, dear. I think I may have done it again. The funny thing about that excursion, apart from the fungi, was the local folks’ insistence that anyone not of the village had been beamed in from the sixties.
          The constant murmurings, that I was seeing and hearing from the bar, just added to the paranoia caused by the puddle, real or imaginary, under the table, dear.

          • Ivy Baton-Round says:

            If time travel was ever going to be possible, I suggest Prof. Hawkeye starts in Rhayader. Wear some patchouli and take an inflatable sheep with you.
            So, off we staggered, flirting with the hedgerows and barking at the huge molluscs that were driving on the right side of our lane, to arrive back at our humble camp fire, which had gone out again.

          • David, call me Prime Minister if you like says:

            Come on ladies. Get to the punchline, laughing out loud, because time is money, FFS. DO IT!

          • Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

            There is no punchline, dear. Relax and go back to running ruining the country.

          • Ivy Baton-Round says:

            Where were we, Elsie?

          • Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

            Fuck knows, dear. Digging your moniker, by the way. Camp fire?

          • Ivy Baton-Round says:

            The pub…that lane…the campfire…the dumping in the bushes!
            Yes. We stoked the fire and set another ‘brew’ to boil whilst watching the sheep do what sheep do. In our ‘heightened’ state we laughed at how sensibly they seemed to interact with each other, even though it was past their bedtimes. You farted. I stirred the pot. We watched.

          • Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

            Yes, dear. It’s all coming back to me. I said, “There’s a young man standing on that hill-top with a fluorescent strip light. Pass the sugar please, Ivy.”

          • Ivy Baton-Round says:

            That man on the hilltop? That’s when I knew I knew you needed a top up. His light was quite mesmerising, though.

          • Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

            Yes, dear. Ten minutes later we realised it was The Moon rising, had a huge punch up and wondered why we had used the map to get the fire going.
            I still can’t remember in which direction the nearest civilisation was, Ivy.

          • Ivy Baton-Round says:

            Twenty miles. In flip-flops. Fuck, how I wish I’d had the balls to say “Yes” to the young man from the commune who said, “Come and have a look around.”

          • Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

            And how, dear! I was only fifty-four and a quarter at that point in time, though.


          • Ali G interviews Nick Griffin says:

            Will you two get a fucking room!

      • 509
        Morticia says:

        No, but the toad’s tool is pushing up the daisies.

  74. 352
  75. 362
    Goodbye Ruby Monday says:

    Good to see Hom Sec Theresa May going along to see the Olympic closing ceremony tonight .

  76. 363
    Saffron says:

    The Oylimpics,not worth a light,will be forgotten a few weeks from now.
    More to the point is when oh when are we going to put these banksters and their money grubbing mates out of business.
    The EUSSR are such a bunch of out of control and unelected troughers that frankly if we all woke up would be out of business.
    This lot of assholes who apparently have half a brain between them are heading for the rocks big time.
    That will leave the banksters for us to deal with and I for one hope we will deal with these crimminals in no uncertain manner.
    Like jail legions of them.
    Look back in history and you will see what I mean.

  77. 365
    • 374
      Nurse Botha says:

      Yes you did, dear. Once upon a time, Nursie had to sell off most of her LPs at 50-75 pence a pop – well below what they were worth but she needed the money at that time. They were her’s to sell, though.

    • 385
      Well it's a thought says:

      Well who’d have guessed the lunatic Brown turned out to be a treasonous lunatic, isn’t it’s time for for plod to more than speak to lunatic Brown and teflon 10 houses Bliar, which country were they helping?.

    • 477
      Lou Scannon says:

      Almost makes it sound like the bastard knew what he was doing. Then again, didn’t Al jaBeeba lie to us by telling us that he had a degree in economics when in reality he was only certified in the histrionics of the Labour party ?

  78. 366
    Ali G interviews Nigel Farage says:

  79. 375
    I really, really, can't be arsed says:

    It’s because he has a clear conscience!

  80. 377
    Saffron says:

    Northern councils and in particular Manchester and it’s surrounding area’s,what are they all about?.
    In particular,what is Lord Peter Smith all about and what are his interests in wigan.

  81. 389
    Bored, Sussex, likes Meccano says:

    If we carry on posting shit, we may be able to break this Heath Robinson blog by sunrise.

  82. 390
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    So do we all remember the fuss the BBC and the Democrats and other leftist c u n t z made when the US Congresswoman was shot by the nutter and Sarah Palin got the blame for ‘targeting’ Democrat seats?

    So why then did fatty Mark Mardell just say on the BBC that Democrats are salivating because Paul Ryan has a target on his back?

  83. 391
    Butch Hutch says:

    Is men’s (boy’s) Olympic diving the GAYDAR top totty watch?

    • 394
      Ivy Baton-Round says:

      Ooops. Silly me.

      ßilly went offline about three hours ago. He said he had “to go to work”.

    • 397
      The Curse of Jonah says:

      Ever since Gorgon wished Daley good luck in the Olympic finals Tom’s career has dived.

  84. 395
    Farah watch says:

    So how do Moslems react to Mohamed being shortened to Mo?

  85. 401
    Kennedy says:

    The problem that Mitt now has and also Obama is that Paul Ryan does come over as a more than credible next American President.

  86. 402
    Mod alternative says:

    The problem that Mitt now has and also Obama is that Paul Ryan does come over as a more than credible next American President.

  87. 403
    M B Void says:

    The problem that Mi tt now has and also Ob ama is that P aul Ry an does come over as a more than credible next Am erican Pre sident.

  88. 404
    Blowing Whistles says:

    I hope some of you read this – It amazes me that so many of you – have fallen into the ‘trap’. You all run one way or the other for one of 2 candidates on the US Presidential circus.

    In other words – you run with one or the other…. while they are both ‘put up jobs’ – put up by the same evil controllers as is ‘political chicanery’. It matters not one jot whichever of the 2 win the 2 horse race – they’re both ‘owned’ by the same owners & trainers. FFS wake up you lot.

    • 407
      Reality says:

      Go to bed Dude.

    • 444
      Ali G interviews Nick Griffin says:

      Very true but I’m not an American.

    • 481
      Nelson Röttefeller says:

      Even so, we have to put on a bit of a show to maintain the illusion of democracy before we let the populace know which stooge we’ve chosen to act as our puppet for the next few years.
      That chad thing that got Dubya into the White House was a belter, wasn’t it ?
      Talk about a win-win situation !

      • 558
        Blowing Whistles says:

        Didn’t you and your ‘friends’ also pull a big one with Al Gore and that polar bear shite?

  89. 411
    Matei says:

    A socialised European-style America? Does that involve boulevards full of cafes that stay open late?

  90. 417
    Anonymous says:

    Biden has a mule?

  91. 428

    Paul Ryan , Ayn Rand and god bothering USA:

  92. 430

    Pаul Ryаn , Аyn Rаnd аnd gоd bоthеrіng USА:

  93. 432
    M0d B0t Be@ter @ttempt says:

    Truth B that P@ul Ry@n is prefe@able to b0th B@rry & M1tt

    • 433
      M0d B0t Be@ter @ttempt says:


      • 436
        Old Holborn says:

        Ewa invented the DelDroid. She is a legend.

        • 438
          Col. M.T. Kernel (rtd.) says:

          SIR- The poodle brought us the concept of Mr. Brown’s “beard” just prior to my “Barry O’Bama” throwaway deposit, sir.

          Yours, BluLabour wasn’t even on my mind, Col. M.T. Kernel (rtd.)

  94. 437
    Profit 4 a prophet says:
    • 439
      Pragmatist says:

      Well you could always move out Sal. No one is stopping you.

    • 441
      What does &amp mean? says:
      • 442
        Yorky says:

        Gosh you do lead a tough life.

      • 467
        annette curton says:

        Another Toynbee in the making, you can always get a job with the Guardian if it hasn’t gone bust by then, meanwhile carry on living the life of Riley as a pretend socialist.

      • 494
        DIScomforted says:

        ‘J’ has to be there?

        Oh no he doesn’t! – many would like to see he and you cast into outer darkness.

    • 449
      albacore says:

      Who is it, pray tell, Sal, that you’ll be dynamiting?
      Quit the girlie teasing. Dish up what you’ve been writing
      Or are you too reluctant to give us a gander
      ‘Cos it ain’t Semtex, it’s a fart in a colander?

    • 528
      I don't need no doctor says:

      Sally the gutter awaits you.

  95. 443
    To whomsoever it may concern says:

    Please go easy on myself. Ta.

  96. 447
    Ali G interviews Nick Griffin says:

    Earthquakes in Iran you say?


  97. 453
    Serge Gainsbourg from the grave says:

    Republicans Abroad wish to thank Guido for doing his bit to further Americanise the UK’s political discourse. See if you can’t get Mitt across to the Limeys better than you did with McCain, Guido.

  98. 454
    Playful says:

    vitally important post

    meanwhile Cameron shows exactly what he’s made of – at the olympics everyday – i wonder who paid for his tickets? probably the same people who paid his DLA!! – still, he’s the champion, more so than beckham – in PROFANITY DECEIT AND BEIng a C-U-N-T

  99. 455
    true olympian says:

    says it al really

    uk media involved in government lie – agaian – who needs leveson when tories carry on war against disabled

    • 464
      The Labour Party says:

      The Tory filth despise the disabled. But we in the Labour Party love the disabled. We love them so much, we created more of them. We lied through our teeth to start a war that killed 100,000 civilians, estimates put the number of disabled (disabled as a direct consequence of our lies and our war) at 43,600.

      Vote Labour. It’s the Conservatives who are the nasty party. Not us.

      • 465 says:

        Amazing isn’t it that after 13 years of Labour government with all their health and safety regulations there were more people on incapacity benefits than ever before. Obviously H&S are as incompetent and unfit for purpose as every other area of the state.

        • 469
          Only 0 days 14 hours 20 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

          My favourite stat from the Years of Labour Lunacy is the one pertaining to child poverty. When Labour came to power in May 1997, 1 in 3 children were classed as “living in poverty”. Brown ‘tackled’ this problem by throwing one hundred billion pounds at it. 13 years – and one hundred billion pounds later – in May 2010, 1 in 3 children were classed as living in poverty.

          • Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose.

            Or perhaps plus ca short-change.

            2,557,501 dole seekers Polly! Not listening, is she? Oh! Guess what? It has changed since I started to write this. 2,558,006 now.

            *was worried you had disappeared at the vital point yesterday!!!*

          • annette curton says:

            Slight correction, after one hundred billion pounds spent by Brown 3/4 of the population are now living in poverty.

          • Only 0 days 13 hours 57 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

            “*was worried you had disappeared at the vital point yesterday!!!*”

            I was having unbelievable problems with the auto m o d e rator thing, rejecting almost every comment I was making, so I nearly gave up!

            Thanka, Annette – I stand corrected.

          • Well glad you got through eventually. It is affecting us all in arbitrary style. That thing has become ultra-twatish since our host has been sunning himself in the South of France and lying outside in the dark to watch the meteor showers. Makes one wonder if the folks at the helm have emptied the office booze cupboard in a single day…

            One could call it the Bricоlе-age … but I won’t. ;-)

            *Bit unfortunate, the first name of Romney’s running mate too…*

        • 476
          Tomorrow's Chip Wrapper says:

          I would suggest that the ploy of moving people off the unemployment registers on to incapacatity registers to massage the jobless figures started under the Thatcher Government ….it enabled successive governments both Tory and Labour to boast that the jobless totals were falling as they only published those claiming unemployment benefits NOT incapacity benefits…thus they could hide the unpalatable fact that rather than falling long term umemployment was actually static or in fact increasing. However it did become endemic under Labour in the 13 years they were in power

          Whilst the economy was booming(albeit on the illusion of credit)these things didn’t matter to those in power as they realaised they were and are largely unsolvable but as the monies ran out they were forced to face the unpalatable facts and try to do something to reduce the bills….these people may not be employable but by switching them back to unemployment benefit which is less generous the government will effectively reduce the overall benefits bill and can claim success at the 2015 election.It’s all an illuison of course and will do nothing to increase growth or increase actual jobs in the economy

          • says:

            An illusion it is. What the Olympic games have shown us is that to succeed you have to work hard and make personal sacrifices. The competitors who won medals did not do so by going on strike or demanding higher pay and pensions and doing less work. The prosperity of the nation is no different. A healthy economy is one which competes and wins work against stiff competition from abroad. Working hard creates more jobs and more wealth to pay for better education, healthcare and welfare. That is why the anti-business Labour and the pettiness of EU bureaucracy have damaged this country so much.

        • 522
          what a scam says:

          I was in Tesco yesterday in Carrickfergus. There must have been 40 cars in the two designated disability parking areas, all with their DLA badges in display.
          Didnt see one person in the store showing any signs of disability.

  100. 470
    Gordon Brown says:

    My bum dumplings smell of egg.

    • 475
      Only 0 days 13 hours 53 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

      “Study suggests dark matter near sun” – Associated Press

      Have the scientists tried looking for it in Gordon Brown’s underpants?

  101. 479
    Grollace says:

    If your name is Romney are you better when the tide goes out or comes in?

  102. 480
    annette curton says:

    Saving Ryans privates? (get me coat).

  103. 486
    FIDO Met Police dog says:

    My cast iron guarantee is that i will give even more of your hard earned to athletics
    I have realised just how popular Boris has become just by wasting a few billion
    so along with putting India on the Moon i see this as an essential vote winner for me
    Cancer patients can fuck off , they won’t win us any gold medals

    • 490
      Tin Can Cam - rattling down the gutter says:

      Hey Cam! – so you’re still trying to get noticed you useless tosser

      • 500
        FIDO Met Police dog says:

        I spend most of my spare time as Fido !
        pissing up trees , taking a dump in the park , and im very good at licking my own arse

        toodle pip Woof !

  104. 492

    It is understood that under The Management of Health and Safety at Work Regulations 1999, former CEO of The Royal Bank of Scotland Group, Sir Fred Glans-Penis Goodwin will be issuing a writ against his former employer in respect of damage sustained to his membrum virile occasioned by grossly negligent arrangement of furniture causing him to become embedded in the pudendum muliebre of his Resources Director, Ms Susan Bor, So poorly had the office furniture been laid out that this occurred some several hundred times before it could be brought under proper control.

    In addition to the primary claim, substantial consequential damages will be sought in respect of loss of employment, share options, pension and knighthood.

    • 496
      Special Clinic aka STD clinic aka Applause Clinic ... says:

      We’re ready and waiting dear, – just loosen them so they slip down easily before you come in, – and be sure not to pee – we need samples.

      Bring a list of all your partners too so we can contact them.

      See you soon!

  105. 495
    A Briton says:

    Who the fuck is Ryan Prick?.

  106. 502
    SARAH PALIN says:

    That Shit Romney is a bigger fucking clown that Gw Bush !
    He introduced RyanAirHead as “The next President of the United States ”
    Where do they find them ?

  107. 505 says:

    Doubt is cast on the reliability of Olympic drug testing.

    Jamaican runner, Yohan Blake: “Basically, we are not human, we dropped from space like Mr Bean. Mr Bean is not a normal guy, he makes jokes. We are not normal guys. We are from space, I am from Mars.”

  108. 510
    anon says:

    this man is certifiable:

    Mr Cameron said:

    Seb Coe has done a brilliant job delivering the best Games ever. Now I want him to help me deliver the best Olympic legacy ever. Legacy has been built into the DNA of London 2012 from the very beginning thanks to Seb. I’m delighted that (the International Olympic Committee president) Jacques Rogge described our legacy plans as a blueprint for future Games hosts.

    I am determined to make the most of the economic opportunities on offer from hosting the Games – making sure that we turn these Games into gold for Britain. I cannot think of a better person than Seb to be our ambassador to the global market-place and make sure we achieve our ambitious legacy targets.

    Absolutely nuts

  109. 513
    Blusea socialist says:

    Pollwtwattle going to do sky news paper review will she slag off the private/indipendent schools producing so many medal winners at the lympics.

    • 519
      Ming Vase Campbell on Sky News says:

      Do you know what Mo stands for? Its stands for Mohammed, and that’s proof that multiculturalism works

      Fuck off you utter prick its proof that some people can run faster than others

  110. 515
    Take away the BBC's Licence to broadcast. NOW! says:

    The BBC was wrong in its attack on Help the Heroes.

    “Lord Dannatt says the report took television journalism to a ‘depressingly low point’.”

  111. 516
    Dave (Windmills on my Mind) says:

    I’ll be talking really tough about immigration, welfare dependency and tax avoidance in the next few weeks ( that is until after the by-election).Then when we’ve won I’ll just go on dishing up the same cowardly incompetent crap you’ve come to know so well.

    • 527
      Grateful says:

      Thanks Dave – true to form and with no sane U turns – you pile of s**t

    • 535
      South of the M4 says:

      Your problem Dave, is that you waffle. A sure sign of being insincere as well as unsure. You just do not convince.

  112. 518
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    I love the way the left are suddenly in favour of competitive sport. Fucking me you’ve got Red C u n t (sorry Ken) and everyone’s favourite fat lesbian Polly Twatbee going on about how Labour are so big on sport.

    you couldn’t make it up to coin a phrase.

  113. 521
    Blair Rich Project says:

    I’m on my way back. You will have noticed how I’ve started to insinuate myself into politics and the media again after spending a lot of time abroad making loads of dosh.I quite fancy being President of Europe. Lots of money-making opportunities.

  114. 523
    Lord Scalded Bollock says:

    Information being received by me confirms that the dynamic duo of David Cameron and George Osborne will be parachuted into the Olympic Stadium for tonight’s closing ceremony.

    Rotten fruit and vegetables and free range eggs will be available at the gate,in order to pelt this duo with.

    • 524
      Time for something completely different? says:

      I would prefer a pile of rocks, with pebbles and bags of dust for the weaker and little ones. [with ack. to M. Python for so many wonderful ideas]

    • 534
      South of the M4 says:

      No need to worry. Nick Clegg has refused to fuel the aircraft. It won’t happen.

      • 574
        Tomorrow's Chip Wrapper says:

        That is immaterial as both “Dave” and “Gidders” have refused to fly owing to the fact that the airline is unable supply the necessary quality or correct size of Team GB kit in Tory blue …the cabin crew offered LibDem yellow or Labour Red of which they had ample on board but the duo refused point blank to wear these so the aircraft is returning to the terminal

  115. 532
    cynic says:

    Its like a Star Wars Convention. C3P0 and R2D2 reunited.

  116. 542
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today I am going to be Mo Farah.

    • 548
      Village People says:

      Wе undеrstаnd yоu prеfеrrеd thе whоlе оf YMCA

    • 551
      Nurse Botha says:

      Twenty five laps of the ring, dear?

      • 552
        I'll have some of that says:

        …plus a long, slow lap of honour to sustained applause.

        • 554
          Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

          …then down on your knees, panting with the exertion, as you take it all in, dear?

          • continuatum says:

            ..onto all fours now, you can’t resist kissing that running surface.

          • Oh! Sud de Nîmes says:

            Back on your feet, the tears of pain and joy at that which you have just endured beginning to well in your left right left, wtf?, eye, the faintest hint of dribble running down your chin…

          • Hugh Mungo-Swanker says:

            …you modestly, and unusually for you this makes it twice in one week, mount the largest box you can find and receive what’s coming your way.

          • The end says:

            Having been gifted the clap eighty thousand times over, expended every last drop in the ring and, in turn, milked the frenzied onlookers dry, your thoughts turn to that spit roast at the in-laws tomorrow afternoon where, once again, you are going to be the central attraction.

          • Malt O'Witty says:

            Not bad for a çunt.

  117. 553
    Mr A Burley says:

    Ladies and Gents,get your choc ices now,before they all go.

    I also have coconuts for sale.

  118. 556
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    I’m hopeful that the athletes from all of the 204 country’s in the 2012 Olympics seek political asylum.

    That way we will have do bloody well at the 2016 Olympics.

  119. 559
    Tango says:
    • 562
      labour just does not get it. says:

      Mo is not multi cultural. He is British through and through you dipstick Hain. He is 100% loyal to Britain and British culture. Stop playing politics and distorting the facts you disgusting man.

      • 563
        The Non-Voting Cattle says:

        Peter Hain is a serial liar. Just ignore him.

        • 582
          Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

          Mo’s dad was British, also he moved here when the so called “nasty party” were in office.

          All that Labour did were let in thousands of fucking terrorists.

          • hiding in their houses says:

            didnt notice too many from multi-cultural Britian lining the route of the Marathon today. Looked hideously white to me

          • Theology Watch says:

            Its still ramadan. They will propably re-emerge on 18th August, totoally ignorant of anything that has been going on.

  120. 564
    Blowing Whistles says:

    So let’s have a little reminder about Chris Huhne MP.

    Fact – he was not a ‘minister’ at the time of the alleged(?) criminal offence of perverting the course of justice. Therefore – he cannot claim any ministerial immunity from being prosecuted.

    It is ‘time-locked’ – that is the date of his ‘Criminal Act’.

    Oh and btw – Vicky P is ‘equally culpable’ – for having acted ‘in concert’ – with him to conceal the matter. That she blew a hissy fit and exposed it all in her rage is irrelevant – she exposed it. Thus beyond all the shenanigans and legalese spouting by the legal fronts – in the too come trial – it’s a very simple matter of ‘guilty’ in the court of public opinion – but lets wait for all the ‘showboating actors from the legal world to laugh at how they try once again to decieve.

  121. 568

    …Romney at a stroke has squared the restless Republican right-wing and tea partiers…

    Our mini-host will not be old enough to remember Edward Atatroke Heath who claimed This would, at a stroke, reduce the rise in prices, increase production and reduce unemployment.

    The reality turned out rather differently…

    • 573
      The Reaper says:

      He died of pneumonia

    • 579
      Britain is going to be forged inthe White Hot heat of technology says:

      James “Harold” Wilson also told us that the devaluation of sterling did not affect the pound in our pocket here at home …much the same as Dave tells us about Quantitive Easing

  122. 586
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The Global Warmists are at it again!!! I am not going to put the link up – ‘cos I have disected the jargon.

    Robin Mckie the Science Editor of the Observer has planted an article in said paper today – the article is littered with scaremongering and baseless ‘assumptions’ dressed up like they are facts. The article is titled “Thinner, smaller and weaker: summer Arctic sea ice could vanish in a decade”

    Note the little trick word ‘Could’.

    The article is of the beliefs of Professor Chris Rapley of UCL and it goes on and on with ‘could …’ this, ‘could …’ that. Other trick words used are: ‘suggests’ [not fact] ‘indicate’ [not fact], ‘likely to’ [not fact], ‘is also possible’ [not fact], ‘gave a clear indication’ [jargon & not fact].

    A quote of Rapley’s “The jet stream could become more unstable, which could mean increasing volatility in weather”.

    That they use such wishy washy language – is proof that their arguments and assertions are those of idiots who have bought into the great Al Gore lie.

  123. 588
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    So Cam-moron wants competitive sports back in schools. So when just about every primary school is now run exclusively by women and lefty lesbians at that, how is he going to get them to comply?

    These dozy dykes have banned boys playing any sort of physical sports for the most part, or perhaps they will introduce the 100m carpet munch?

    Perhaps he’d be better off insisting that 50% of primary school teachers are male instead?

    • 592
      Only 0 days 06 hours 58 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

      “Perhaps he’d be better off insisting that 50% of primary school teachers are male instead?”

      (2nd attempt at posting) I doubt that would fit with his All-Fem*ale Selection List policy.

    • 594
      NUT says:

      We will introduce bean flicking as a sport. Everyone will get a prize

  124. 593
    Fubar says:

    Did that Italian boxer just get robbed?.

  125. 599
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Bent Local Councils – now there’s a subject matter e.g. Wandsworth Borough Council.

    Most Council employees … well some; belong to Unison … and Unison promise to protect them of sorts …

    Most of the police forces (inc Civilian staff working for the police) in the UK are represented by which Union – you guessed it Unison.

    Hello – so when there’s a bit off fraud or corruption going on down at the council isn’t it not funny or strange that the police very RARELY get called in to investigate Fraud & Corruption within the council?

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Sarkozy Tried it on With Hollande’s Ex | Times
Another Spare Room Subsidy Cut Success | Harry Phibbs
Rich Now Have Less Leisure Than Poor | Economist
UKIP’s Immigration Policy Promotes Migrant Entrepreneurs | Breitbart
Another Feminist Lecture | Laura Perrins
UKIP Posters Bad Economics But Good Politics | James Delingpole
Tories Losing to UKIP in Scotland | ConHome

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

A confused Nick Griffin says Nigel Farage is a shill for the City, forgetting that City banks want to stay in the EU:

“Farage is a snake oil salesman, but a very good one. His supposed anti-immigration stance is all smoke and mirrors, as is his carefully cultivated image as a ‘man of the people’. The truth is that UKIP is a pro-immigration party that exists to lobby for the interests of the City of London.”

Alexrod says:

It’s money innit.

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