How Mervyn King Lost Bank Battle War | WSJ
BBC Corporation Tax Horror Story | IEA
Sally Bercow Judgement in Full | Mr Justice Tugendhat
Commies Blame Capitalism For Terror Attack | The Commentator
Lord Black v Press Regulation | Guardian
Osborne’s Complacency | FT
DWP’s Welfare Failings | Isabel Hardman
Get Used to Coalitions | David Aaronovitch
Woolwich a Showcase in the Banality of Evil | Fraser Nelson
The Enemy Within | Max Hastings
Muslim Led Military-Style Free School Needed | Toby Young
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
Ed Balls stretches credulity by claiming he isn’t ambitious…
“I would love to be part of Ed’s Labour government but what I do next for me is not an all-consuming passion. I’m more bothered, in a personal sense, about getting to grade 8 piano by the time I’m 50.”
Bill Quango MP says:
Ned Flanders – Clegg
Lisa Simpson – Natalie Bennett
Milhouse – Hilary Benn
Martin Prince – Andy Burnham
Edna Krabappel – Luciana Berger
Crazy Cat Lady – Glenda jackson
Comic book guy – John Prescott
Carl – Chucka
Lenny – Philip Hammond
Willie – Eric joyce
Poochie – Gordon Brown
Reverend Lovejoy – Tony Blair
Where there is blame, there is a claim!
Hunt hits woman’s Hunt with Bell end.
Thith ith outrageous.
What I say to Mr Hunt is that he should resign immediately and if he doesn’t The Prime Minister should sack him.
In his position Hunt should have checked his end before he waved it around. He could have damaged that woman. On the wider issue, everyone should check their bell ends immediately – this cannot be allowed to continue.
But we need to know why this was allowed to happenin the first place, so today I will be approaching the Speaker to seek the recall of Parliament. I will be calling for a judge led inquiry into this, reporting to the house before the next election. If the Prime Minister will not call an inquiry, I will set one up myself.
Priceless.
….floats my boat
This is how he’s become known as Hapless Hunt…
It’s an omni-jangles.
Ed, do you see a bell end every time you look in the mirror?
Some bellends are more easily checked than others. It WOULD be a gentleman of the, shall we say, “trimmed” variety to come up with this.
Oy vey! Assad/Hezbollah sabotaged the bell! Nuke Syria and Iran now!!!
Ssssh! False Flag not due till tonight!
You lie, capitalist running doggy.
It was a joyous, joyous, event… especially since no-one got hurt. He had the presence of mind to to make a joke about ‘elf and safety’… Yes… through my mind passed most of the funny tags that have arisen in this thread, but not so well thought out as they are here. Wot a larf! I confess it endeared the laddie to me. When you have a name not far short of The Berkshire …. you have to be up for a few quips.
Let this be a warning, all. This is what can happen if your nuts are loose.
Neat, neat! Best to keep em properly screwed, I’d guess.
Jerry built rubbish, ban Chinese imports/
Sabotage, surely? His was the only bell out of about a hundred that this happened to?
Yes, but look who was ringing it
He’s a wanker
Maybe he is a w*nker, but it seems to me that he was nobbled [where was Bollox at the time?
To be fair, the ladies didnt seem worried. They were fluttering around him like bees around a honeypot !
Easy accident to happen, what’s worse is he passes the bell to some bird and skulks off like a scolded cat. What a tosser.
Hunt’s crumbling bell end…
He’s a bit awkward, isn’t he.
“wife” = Beard?
A bit stiff, indeed.
What’s the betting that Mrs. Duffy unscrewed that deliberately?
It was Sue.
Or was it Gordon?
That’s made my day! Hilarious!
Boris’ barnstorming performance yesterday and his response to Mitt Mormony’s stupid comments showed why he should be PM and not Camoron.
I thought Cameron’s pointed “it’s easier if you do it in the middle of nowhere” remark quite a classy response.
I wonder whether slagging off Utah makes most americans chuckle.
Who would call a child Mitt and expect him to be any good at anything?
I used to be a female brain surgeon.
You deserve a medal – tough nuts to crack.
And for everything else there’s mastercard…
Jeremy Hunt hits woman with ‘Gordon Brown’
Absolutely no words needed.
Apart from those words to say that no words are needed.
If you look up the word TWAT in a dictionary there is just a picture of Jeremy Hunt.
Itis just like Dubya trying to walk through a false door
Definition of the word TWAT
1. [Brit, vulgar] A man who is a stupid incompetent fool
2. Obscene term for female genitals
Tkae your pick
Fair play. He took that well.
HE took it well – it was HER got hit??
Is anyone else as totally disinterested in the Olympics as myself?
Perhaps, but I signed a contract to say that I can never ever agree with you on this forum.
No. I think it’s going to be fun.
If there are any more incidents involing Jewemy it will certainly brighten 3 weeks of boredom
Any more stunts involving Jewemy Hunt and it certainly will be
Bread and circuses have no effect on those who can think critically.
Look up “disinterested” in the dictionary.
disinterested = not interested
No, you can quite easily be interested in something in which you are disinterested. Uninterested is perhaps the entirely different word you are seeking. But these fripperies are a tad wasted on a website where Neo “spellman” Guido has at least a partial hand on the tiller.
+ 1,000,000,000,0000,000,000,000,000,000,000
Haven’t you got anything better to do?
Ditto
dis·in·ter·est·ed/disˈintəˌrestid/
Adjective:
Not influenced by considerations of personal advantage.
Having or feeling no interest in something.
A judge should be disinterested, but not uninterested.
+0.75
Yep!
I could see 2 bell-ends in that….
and only 1 came out of the bell.
went like the clappers tho!
I’ve seen bigger penises, dear.
How is your Reg nowadays, Elsie? Still got the same trouble?
His back is still is giving him terrible gyp dear, I’ve not had any in years.
Oooh. I’m flattered, dear.
Yes, dear. He is feeling rather brittle so I thought I’d let him lie there a while longer. He doesn’t complain, God bless him, but I think this heat wears him out.
I’ll tell him you enquired after him, dear. That will cheer him up.
I’ve always looked up to him as a role model — be sure to tell him that, Elsie!
Oh, I still look down on him as a role model, dear. I just have to be careful when I’m Hoovering.
Wouldn’t want him to disappear in the suction…
My fingers couldn’t help typing that – the brain had so little to do with it. Glad it tickled you.
I am still tender after yesterday.
Did they arrive?
Ha ha. The huge, fatter one (the wife, I think) phoned an hour ago to say they’d landed some time before but weren’t being allowed off the plane because there was no ladder available!
Well! You know my sense of humour – I had to bite my tongue.
I thought that was what evacuation slides were for.
How do you accidentally swallow a newt BTW, even an imaginary one?
Oh, I wouldn’t put anything past Charlie – a real character!
As a baby in his pram, with it’s brake on, he’d rock it vigorously enough to propel himself across their patio. We’d just turn it around at the end and watch him “bunny-hop” his way back.
Pre-toddler stage, and being in a family of strict vegetarians, Charlie was caught face-down in Tinker’s bowl happily munching at her Whiskas!
He’s nine now. A newt would go well with his crisps. From the age of four he was assuming we were all thick and carefully explaining the world to us.
Fucking annoying. He’ll probably end up as PM one day. Had to tell you x
Very much the social system which pervades Scandinavia. Encourages unbearable little toads. I like the kids should be seen and not heard approach except that good tuition is important. I don’t mind explaining anything to a kid who genuinely wants to know but do not see why they have to be entertained.
Nasty bastard, I’ve been called. Always pleases me… ♥
Yeah, I knows where you comin from.
Tick tock tick tock, the Olympic clock starts the countdown to the finish line and a late summer cabinet reshuffle. Taking bets on Jeremy (Cockney rhyming slang)Hunt being on the backbences demotion list.
How hideously diverse. And that one looks bigotted to me.
Is that the new Sony Tv that the taxpayer has just bought for Sal and John?
Man who surround himself with children seem taller.
Where is the Chinese one? Also, why is there a hippo in that clip?
Nice she takes an interest in her children, watching them on TV from the comfort of her armchair ??
where’s snow white?
With all of these bells ringing,is it Quasimodo’s birthday?
Male chauvinist pig!
Notice the kid who has been carefully positioned to obscure how fat Abbott is.
Oh get her!
Your only jealous ‘cos no man has ever thrown his bellend at you, you fat smelly bitch.
Hard to tell i can see two bell ends, at least the bell makes a sensible sound when shook
Totally not bothered. Don’t know where to start. Zil lanes, butcher not able to make Olympic rings out of sausages, brand police, businesses threatened, g4s fiasco, ticketing malarkey, people who say that people should embrace all of this. Billions spent in a time of financial meltdown. Paris must be chuckling.
Paris isn’t chuckling, because its gone to Nice for a month.
That sounds Nice.
Let’s all go to Paris then and have a little rummage around, dear.
One up for the CESM. I understand that just before that Committee (who can’t be named for obvious reasons) made the choice between London and Paris , the CESM found a form of words which insulted the said Committee with the result that
Paris ‘lost’. I imagine that a lot of cheese was eaten that night and on many nights more recently .
Yeah, we get all that. Lots of talking points. But for now can we just enjoy the spectacle?
Outside of football and say the 100 meters do you normally watch any of the other sports?
Thought not.
Spectacle? It’s mind drivel.
I notice there was a brassy bell end featured at the end of that clip also.
Who’s the fittie in the black and white dress?
Well, at least it wasn’t Gordon Brown. He’d have put her in hospital and then blamed her for being hurt.
She was a bigoted woman anyway.
Tamped with beforehand by a sad lefty no doubt.
Who is the fittie in the Black and White dress?
Ed, why don’t you…
It’s Mr Balls to you, teaboy!
Mr Balls, Mitt Romney called me Mr Leader. Why don’t you ever call me Mr Leader? Or at least Mr Miliband?
Pipe down and go get me my tea and biscuits, you tosspot!
Is that the first time his bell end has come off in his hand?
Oooooooh!!
…but I like you.
This issue warrants…….wait for it guys and gals…..
A JUDGE LED INQUIRY
At least he laughing, if I had my bell end over my head, there would also be tears in my eyes.
Jeremy Hunt could have used more cowbell!
H*rry C*le on bass, AGAIN!!
We can confirm that charges against Jeremy Hunt are being considered.
Our team are attempting to establish whether the bell in question was supplied by Rupert Murdoch.
Or the BBC. Or the Guardian. Or a member of the Labour Party.
Obviously done on purpose that one, c’unts!
The irony is that Naughtie is a fat c.u nt
he obviously meant to say
jeremy Hunt
the hulture secretary
He’s gone and done it… Call me Dave is trying to use the Olympics to relaunch his Big Society Boll*ocks
The spanner has “””Given 17 tickets for tonight’s Olympic Opening Ceremony, but has given them to people who have contributed to Big Society projects”””
Moussa, are you a closet bureaucrat? I just wondered, given that you use speach marks in triplicate….
It’s an formatting error that sometimes happens when someone forwards something though old email systems.
It seems Moussa isn’t even writing his own drivel.
My warmest congratulations to Guido for having received a new Olympic record of 233 tweets with this clip.
Another gold for Team GB without doubt.
I note with satisfaction that the tweets have now reached a staggering record of 280 and Guido shows no signs of stopping.
You’re either in front of Guido or behind him.
I know which I am !!!!
I see you blue noses have managed to totally P off London Cab drivers…Well Done.
London Cab drivers are a bastion of right wing nutcases who vote Tory even if a cabbage was its leader.
Whereas the left wing loonies would put their ‘X’ next to a piece of dog shit with a red rosette affixed to it.
Ha! ‘blue noses’ whose favourite is that? I guess Snot!!!
I think I recognise the woman that got hit…her face rings a bell!
chuckled
Good job that didn’t hit me, otherwise the police would have been there dealing with a major race crime perpetrated by one of the elitist posh boys from the ‘nasty party’.
Do you have a double?
Chin ? Yes. Four of them.
We had the Viking invasions.
We had the Danish invasion.
Today it is the Swedish invasion.
I know it’s a bit pedantic, but the Vikings were Danish, Swedish (and Norwegian).
Unless you’re suggesting that we’re being over-run by Volvos?
Oh. I know my Grimsbys, Nasebys and Whitbys, not to mention -thorpes, -thwaites, and -tofts.
I was using some historic license to make a point about some arrivals today who appear to be rather less benign, by all accounts!
I have covered myself in deep heat and am limbering up to light the Olympic Cauldron
Couldn’t you cover yourself in petroleum jelly?
Forget the jelly.
A solution of petroleum, benzene and polystyrene – makes a lovely smell in the morning.
Minister assaults woman with bell end on 6-inch cruiser.
Acts performing at the opening ceremony include Duran Duran, Paolo Nutini and Snow Patrol. I mean, really, is that the best they could do?!
It’s gonna be a huge embarrassment.
are you kidding?!?
Is Nokia throwing an Olympic sport?
Yes. I will win Gold in tossing the Cable.
No doubt the bell looked great on paper, it just fell apart as soon as it was put to the practical test. Wonder if it will be an exemplar of the rest of the Olympic planning?
Who provided the bell? G4S?
In theory there’s no difference between practise and theory. In practise there is.
That was one of my favorite lines. (And you could look it up.)
Another one was: “They let me go [as a manager] when I turned seventy. Believe me, I’ll never make that mistake again.”
Camp Anology. Popular down the PoW I believe.
Ding-a-ling
and Jeremy does his thing!
What kind of cock-wep offers an apology by screeching “Oo-err, health and safety!!!”?
no-one got the Sky news interview where they asked Boris about Hunt’s bellend coming off?
I can assure you that there is nothing worse than unscrewing your bell end.