July 27th, 2012

Breaking Video: Jeremy Hunt Hits Woman With Bell End


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    Where there is blame, there is a claim!


    • 10
      Dropping a Clanger says:

      Hunt hits woman’s Hunt with Bell end.


      • 46
        Weird Ed says:

        Thith ith outrageous.

        What I say to Mr Hunt is that he should resign immediately and if he doesn’t The Prime Minister should sack him.

        In his position Hunt should have checked his end before he waved it around. He could have damaged that woman. On the wider issue, everyone should check their bell ends immediately – this cannot be allowed to continue.

        But we need to know why this was allowed to happenin the first place, so today I will be approaching the Speaker to seek the recall of Parliament. I will be calling for a judge led inquiry into this, reporting to the house before the next election. If the Prime Minister will not call an inquiry, I will set one up myself.


      • 59
        W!ll!am Hague-WarCriminal says:

        Oy vey! Assad/Hezbollah sabotaged the bell! Nuke Syria and Iran now!!!


      • 149
        bandersnatch says:

        It was a joyous, joyous, event… especially since no-one got hurt. He had the presence of mind to to make a joke about ‘elf and safety’… Yes… through my mind passed most of the funny tags that have arisen in this thread, but not so well thought out as they are here. Wot a larf! I confess it endeared the laddie to me. When you have a name not far short of The Berkshire …. you have to be up for a few quips.


    • 66
      Engineer says:

      Let this be a warning, all. This is what can happen if your nuts are loose.


    • 88
      Popeye says:

      Jerry built rubbish, ban Chinese imports/


    • 109
      Some Twat Up North says:

      He’s a wanker


      • 131
        Rat's arse says:

        Maybe he is a w*nker, but it seems to me that he was nobbled [where was Bollox at the time?


    • 140
      Anonymous says:

      To be fair, the ladies didnt seem worried. They were fluttering around him like bees around a honeypot !


    • 147
      Wellard says:

      Easy accident to happen, what’s worse is he passes the bell to some bird and skulks off like a scolded cat. What a tosser.


  2. 2

    Hunt’s crumbling bell end…


  3. 3
    Jonny says:

    He’s a bit awkward, isn’t he.


  4. 4
    Snotsicle says:

    What’s the betting that Mrs. Duffy unscrewed that deliberately?


  5. 5
    towerofbabble says:

    That’s made my day! Hilarious!


  6. 6
    BoJo for PM says:

    Boris’ barnstorming performance yesterday and his response to Mitt Mormony’s stupid comments showed why he should be PM and not Camoron.


  7. 7
    Prickweasel says:

    And for everything else there’s mastercard…


  8. 8
    Aunty Matter says:

    Jeremy Hunt hits woman with ‘Gordon Brown’


  9. 9
    Les says:

    Absolutely no words needed.


  10. 11
    Les says:

    Apart from those words to say that no words are needed.


  11. 12
    simon r says:

    If you look up the word TWAT in a dictionary there is just a picture of Jeremy Hunt.


    • 134
      Forkbender says:

      Itis just like Dubya trying to walk through a false door


    • 136
      Forkbender says:

      Definition of the word TWAT
      1. [Brit, vulgar] A man who is a stupid incompetent fool
      2. Obscene term for female genitals

      Tkae your pick


  12. 13
    Soothsayer says:

    Fair play. He took that well.


  13. 14
    AC1 says:

    Is anyone else as totally disinterested in the Olympics as myself?


  14. 15
    alexsandr says:

    I could see 2 bell-ends in that….

    and only 1 came out of the bell.

    went like the clappers tho!


  15. 16
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    I’ve seen bigger penises, dear.


    • 32
      Sir Aston Martin says:

      How is your Reg nowadays, Elsie? Still got the same trouble?


      • 56
        Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

        His back is still is giving him terrible gyp dear, I’ve not had any in years.


      • 60
        Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

        Yes, dear. He is feeling rather brittle so I thought I’d let him lie there a while longer. He doesn’t complain, God bless him, but I think this heat wears him out.
        I’ll tell him you enquired after him, dear. That will cheer him up.


        • 77
          Sir Aston Martin says:

          I’ve always looked up to him as a role model — be sure to tell him that, Elsie!


          • Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

            Oh, I still look down on him as a role model, dear. I just have to be careful when I’m Hoovering.


          • Hope Charlie has recovered from ingesting that newt says:

            Wouldn’t want him to disappear in the suction…


          • Becky Pippins says:

            My fingers couldn’t help typing that – the brain had so little to do with it. Glad it tickled you.


          • Hope Charlie has recovered from ingesting that newt says:

            I am still tender after yesterday.

            Did they arrive?


          • Dick Emery Paper says:

            Ha ha. The huge, fatter one (the wife, I think) phoned an hour ago to say they’d landed some time before but weren’t being allowed off the plane because there was no ladder available!

            Well! You know my sense of humour – I had to bite my tongue.


          • Hope Charlie has recovered from ingesting that newt says:

            I thought that was what evacuation slides were for.

            How do you accidentally swallow a newt BTW, even an imaginary one?


          • E says:

            Oh, I wouldn’t put anything past Charlie – a real character!

            As a baby in his pram, with it’s brake on, he’d rock it vigorously enough to propel himself across their patio. We’d just turn it around at the end and watch him “bunny-hop” his way back.

            Pre-toddler stage, and being in a family of strict vegetarians, Charlie was caught face-down in Tinker’s bowl happily munching at her Whiskas!

            He’s nine now. A newt would go well with his crisps. From the age of four he was assuming we were all thick and carefully explaining the world to us.

            Fucking annoying. He’ll probably end up as PM one day. Had to tell you x


          • Är hustrun gift med Stew, svenska? says:

            Very much the social system which pervades Scandinavia. Encourages unbearable little toads. I like the kids should be seen and not heard approach except that good tuition is important. I don’t mind explaining anything to a kid who genuinely wants to know but do not see why they have to be entertained.

            Nasty bastard, I’ve been called. Always pleases me… ♥


          • hemskt jäveln låter ganska trevligt says:

            Yeah, I knows where you comin from.


  16. 18
    farah d says:

    Tick tock tick tock, the Olympic clock starts the countdown to the finish line and a late summer cabinet reshuffle. Taking bets on Jeremy (Cockney rhyming slang)Hunt being on the backbences demotion list.


  17. 21
  18. 23
    Lord Scalded Bollock says:

    With all of these bells ringing,is it Quasimodo’s birthday?


  19. 26
    Diane Fatbutt says:

    Male chauvinist pig!


  20. 28
    lastofthesummervintage says:

    Hard to tell i can see two bell ends, at least the bell makes a sensible sound when shook


  21. 29
    Anonymous says:

    Totally not bothered. Don’t know where to start. Zil lanes, butcher not able to make Olympic rings out of sausages, brand police, businesses threatened, g4s fiasco, ticketing malarkey, people who say that people should embrace all of this. Billions spent in a time of financial meltdown. Paris must be chuckling.


    • 39
      SP4BS says:

      Paris isn’t chuckling, because its gone to Nice for a month.


      • 71
        SaltPetre says:

        That sounds Nice.


      • 144
        Trahison des Clercs says:

        One up for the CESM. I understand that just before that Committee (who can’t be named for obvious reasons) made the choice between London and Paris , the CESM found a form of words which insulted the said Committee with the result that
        Paris ‘lost’. I imagine that a lot of cheese was eaten that night and on many nights more recently .


    • 80
      Londoner says:

      Yeah, we get all that. Lots of talking points. But for now can we just enjoy the spectacle?


      • 119
        AC1 says:

        Outside of football and say the 100 meters do you normally watch any of the other sports?

        Thought not.

        Spectacle? It’s mind drivel.


  22. 33
    Randy Focker says:

    I notice there was a brassy bell end featured at the end of that clip also.


  23. 33
    Anonymous says:

    Who’s the fittie in the black and white dress?


  24. 35
    Gordon Brown is a cock says:

    Well, at least it wasn’t Gordon Brown. He’d have put her in hospital and then blamed her for being hurt.


  25. 37
    MI6 says:

    Tamped with beforehand by a sad lefty no doubt.


  26. 40
    Chamberlain's_Moustache says:

    Who is the fittie in the Black and White dress?


  27. 42
    Last night at Labour HQ says:

    Ed, why don’t you…

    It’s Mr Balls to you, teaboy!

    Mr Balls, Mitt Romney called me Mr Leader. Why don’t you ever call me Mr Leader? Or at least Mr Miliband?

    Pipe down and go get me my tea and biscuits, you tosspot!


  28. 45
    I Wonder says:

    Is that the first time his bell end has come off in his hand?


  29. 53
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    This issue warrants…….wait for it guys and gals…..



  30. 54
    Observer says:

    At least he laughing, if I had my bell end over my head, there would also be tears in my eyes.


  31. 58
    Christopher Walken says:

    Jeremy Hunt could have used more cowbell!


  32. 63
    Crown Prosecution Service says:

    We can confirm that charges against Jeremy Hunt are being considered.

    Our team are attempting to establish whether the bell in question was supplied by Rupert Murdoch.


  33. 65
    The BBC are cunts says:


  34. 68
    Moussa Koussa says:

    He’s gone and done it… Call me Dave is trying to use the Olympics to relaunch his Big Society Boll*ocks

    The spanner has “””Given 17 tickets for tonight’s Olympic Opening Ceremony, but has given them to people who have contributed to Big Society projects”””


    • 111
      Engineer says:

      Moussa, are you a closet bureaucrat? I just wondered, given that you use speach marks in triplicate….


      • 120
        AC1 says:

        It’s an formatting error that sometimes happens when someone forwards something though old email systems.

        It seems Moussa isn’t even writing his own drivel.


  35. 69
    Lord Coe-Ca Cola says:

    My warmest congratulations to Guido for having received a new Olympic record of 233 tweets with this clip.

    Another gold for Team GB without doubt.


    • 94
      Lord Coe-Ca Cola says:

      I note with satisfaction that the tweets have now reached a staggering record of 280 and Guido shows no signs of stopping.

      You’re either in front of Guido or behind him.

      I know which I am !!!!


  36. 73
    Moussa Koussa says:

    I see you blue noses have managed to totally P off London Cab drivers…Well Done.

    London Cab drivers are a bastion of right wing nutcases who vote Tory even if a cabbage was its leader.


    • 112
      Wotta Tossa says:

      Whereas the left wing loonies would put their ‘X’ next to a piece of dog shit with a red rosette affixed to it.


    • 145
      Trahison des Clercs says:

      Ha! ‘blue noses’ whose favourite is that? I guess Snot!!!


  37. 74
    Murray_midget says:

    I think I recognise the woman that got hit…her face rings a bell!


  38. 78
    Diane Fatbott says:

    Good job that didn’t hit me, otherwise the police would have been there dealing with a major race crime perpetrated by one of the elitist posh boys from the ‘nasty party’.


  39. 84
    Hope Charlie has recovered from ingesting that newt says:

    We had the Viking invasions.

    We had the Danish invasion.

    Today it is the Swedish invasion.


    • 113
      Engineer says:

      I know it’s a bit pedantic, but the Vikings were Danish, Swedish (and Norwegian).

      Unless you’re suggesting that we’re being over-run by Volvos?


      • 118
        Hope Charlie has recovered from ingesting that newt says:

        Oh. I know my Grimsbys, Nasebys and Whitbys, not to mention -thorpes, -thwaites, and -tofts.

        I was using some historic license to make a point about some arrivals today who appear to be rather less benign, by all accounts!


  40. 89
    Gordon Brown says:

    I have covered myself in deep heat and am limbering up to light the Olympic Cauldron


    • 96
      Only 16 days 10 hours 13 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

      Couldn’t you cover yourself in petroleum jelly?


  41. 99
    Gonk says:

    Minister assaults woman with bell end on 6-inch cruiser.


  42. 103
    What a bag of shite says:

    Acts performing at the opening ceremony include Duran Duran, Paolo Nutini and Snow Patrol. I mean, really, is that the best they could do?!


  43. 104
    Gordon Brown says:

    Is Nokia throwing an Olympic sport?


  44. 115
    Lizzie says:

    No doubt the bell looked great on paper, it just fell apart as soon as it was put to the practical test. Wonder if it will be an exemplar of the rest of the Olympic planning?

    Who provided the bell? G4S?


    • 127
      AC1 says:

      In theory there’s no difference between practise and theory. In practise there is.


      • 146
        Casey Stengel, Famous American Baseballer says:

        That was one of my favorite lines. (And you could look it up.)
        Another one was: “They let me go [as a manager] when I turned seventy. Believe me, I’ll never make that mistake again.”


  45. 116
    Gen. Sir Pritchard Dammit. says:

    Camp Anology. Popular down the PoW I believe.


  46. 129
    keredybretsa says:

    and Jeremy does his thing!


  47. 138
    Bellender Carlisle says:

    What kind of cock-wep offers an apology by screeching “Oo-err, health and safety!!!”?


  48. 143
    oo-er says:

    no-one got the Sky news interview where they asked Boris about Hunt’s bellend coming off?


  49. 148
    Esmeralda says:

    I can assure you that there is nothing worse than unscrewing your bell end.


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