July 26th, 2012

Chancellor Zero Feeling the Heat

George Osborne has taken a major kicking in the papers this morning. The left-wing press have naturally been twisting the knife, but perhaps the headline that will hurt the Chancellor the most is The Sun appearing to call for him to be sacked. When Vince Cable is being touted as a potential replacement you know things are bad…

Nadine is stirring too:

Given who is wielding the knife, this could well result in a shoring up of the Chancellor’s position…


207 Comments

  1. 1
    Dr Eoin Clarke says:

    Bring Back Gordon!

    • 3
      Brillo says:
      • 13
        Anonymous, 10 Dowing St. SW1 says:

        Ha ha. Sucker. 1-0

        • 29
          Gideon says:

          This country’s fucked! Have you seen the price of rentboys?!

          • tight squeeze says:

            Yeah. Plus, I’m only getting 12 to the gallon.

          • Anonymous says:

            William Vague the most trusted politician??? We are screwed!

          • Aunt Mat says:

            No No – Not Cable.

            Just because he predicted the crash, he thinks he’s God’s gift.

            Put a beard on him and he could run the Taliban.

            Just get someone normal who can do big sums.

            Can’t be that hard can it?

          • erm... says:

            recession is good for the gums….it is healthy. growth is a sex thing. perhaps the answer is tantric. #whoknows.notme

        • 34
          Assad says:

          Mr Hague make good Chancellor. Then he fucks country right up the shitter as well as little boys.

      • 200
        Baron Hogwash says:

        Here Andy boyo – what was your tv show rating in 2010 compared to now?

    • 4
      Gordon Brown says:

      I will bring a massive +0% growth within femto seconds

      • 51
        Ed Bo££ocks says:

        I invented Neo-Endogenous Bo££ocks !

        It’s the only way forward!

        • 93
          Engineer says:

          He only invented Post Neo-Classical Endogenous Growth to try and impress Yvette. Sadly, it worked.

      • 52
        Engineer says:

        Gordon, you know full well you could only manage -0% growth. On a good day.

    • 48
      Anything Gordon can do I can do better. George Osborne-- says:

      To give Osborne his due, he did promise that he would match Labour’s taxation and spending. Exceeding theses figures though is just a tad reckless.

      • 75
        Fish says:

        But hang on St Vincent of Cable is riding to the rescue, modestly agreeing with Lord Oakshit that he would make a good Chancelor.

        Not short of self delusion is he? But a bit lacking in self perception.

        • 90
          Engineer says:

          Cable as Chancellor makes about as much sense as Abu Hamza as Defence Secretary, or Roy Chubby Brown as Foreign Secretary.

          • Sick of the greed and lies(still) says:

            I would substitute Roy Chubby Brown with Tony Bliar as Middle East Peace Envoy. That surely is the joke of the century?

          • UN Disaster Zone says:

            Or Gordon as the world’s teacher.

    • 86
      Engineer says:

      Having read his Telegraph article earlier, I would respectfully suggest that Allister Heath has rather more idea about how to tackle Britain’s woes than (almost) the entire Commons combined.

    • 146
      Sandra in Accounts says:

      No point – George follows Gordonomics to the letter – perfecting the fiscal lunacy of McMental:

      * Highest taxes ever
      * Biggest number of public sector “workers” ever
      * Highest spending Government in our history
      * Highest borrowing Government in our history
      * Record amount of Sterling printing.

      Osbourne is utterly incompetent.

      We need:

      * Low taxes
      * State spending halved
      * Government out of the economy.

      But we are not going to get it with Osbourne & Cameron in the Conservative Party.

      As a Conservative I want them gone.

      • 158
        AC1 says:

        Don’t forget.

        No laws repealed.
        More regulation added.
        More on foreign aid.
        More to the EUSSR.

      • 204
        Marion the cat says:

        I suspect that whilst it may be painful and take a couple of parliamentary terms, the real answer is a UKIP government – take ten years though to overcome the fear of not voting conservative and letting labour in by default (please remember Cameron is Blair Light) and flushing out some of the UKIP trash and getting real Conservatives to represent them.

    • 151
      AC1 says:

      Need someone who’ll start to cut the metastatic state out of society.

      Maude?

  2. 2
    Andrew Efiong says:

    He’s on the run!

    At a time when he needs to be explaining his policies to the nation the Chancellor has dived for cover.

    He’s fast losing credibility and must be the worst Chancellor since Gordon Brown.

    • 38

      I thought Gordon would have that worst ever chancellor award for decades.

      Osborne certainly giving him a run for his money.

      • 58
        Axe The Telly Tax says:

        I never thought i’d see a more incompetent chancellor than Denis “Silly Billy” Healey but Osborne has managed it.

      • 61
        Axe The Telly Tax says:

        I never thought i’d see a more incompetent chancellor than Denis Healey but Osborne has managed it.

  3. 5
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    I am so terribly sorry

  4. 7
    UlyssesReturns says:

    ABC – Anyone But Cable or A Bloody C+nt as I like to call him. Having said that would someone please put Osborne out of our misery? I could do a better job them him and I’m as thick as soup.

    • 43
      The Golem says:

      Bragging aside, I suspect you could. Hague, unfortunately, would just sing from the same hymn sheet. I’m sure we’d find the interests of the electorate at the bottom in the footnotes.

  5. 8
    SP4BS says:

    Is he any relation to the Mr. Zero that produced the “gordon is a moron” song.

  6. 9
    George says:

    Don’t call him Chancellor Zero, call him Chancellor -0.7%, sure it’s not as catchy, but it is more honest.

    Osborne is simply not radical enough for what’s needed with the job at hand, he’s cutting things that, whilst will at some point need to be cut (e.g. 50p tax), March this year was not the time. Instead he should’ve focussed on increasing the personal allowance to £10,000, abolishing VAT on energy bills, cutting VAT on the leisure industry to 5% and so-forth.

    Get Osborne out, but not Cable in. Bring in a proper Libertarian – Carswell, Redwood, Laws etc.

    • 12
      UlyssesReturns says:

      I could sort this out in 7 days. One action a day.

      1. Sack Cable and replace with nobody – close the whole shambles of the Department of Business Inovation and Skills and the Board of Trade
      2. Raise the tax and NIC threshold to begin at £20,000 immediately
      3. Reduce the top rate of tax to 30% immediately
      4. Reduce corporation tax to 10% immediately
      5. Suspend all employment legislation for companies employing fewer than 100.
      6. An act in parliament repatriating all Human Rights and Employment regulations allowing British firms to employ whoever they liked.
      7. Cut the welfare budget in half immediately.

      Stand back and watch as the economy takes off.

      Hold an election and start governing as Conservatives.

      • 15
        Ayn Rand says:

        That’s good,very good.

      • 20
        Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

        Are you in the government, dear?

      • 22
        George says:

        I absolutely agree with all those policies!

        • 104
          Ebony Goddess says:

          I will reward you Naughty Georgie Poregy – but do SOMETHING to stimulate BAD BOY!

      • 23
        Anonymous says:

        5.Suspend all employment legislation for companies employing fewer than 100.

        So, employees could be sacked at will? No maternity leave; no sick leave; no pension?

        • 45
          A self-employed worker says:

          Yup. That’s how it’s been for me for the last 24 years.

          It works fine.

        • 65
          UlyssesReturns says:

          Ask yourself why a small company would want to hire someone if they had to pay for a pension, excessive sick pay and maternity. Now ask yourself if it is better to be on the dole with all those rights or in gainfull employment without those rights but benefitting yourself, your family and the country. My guess is, like the twats who voted for labour and the LDs, you would prefer the first option.

      • 36
        George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

        I agree with all those, apart from points 1 through 7

      • 56
        Eton fags says:

        Yes that’s right, sod all the plebs who work for us, why should they have any rights, they’re nothing but chattel. Those American chappies in 18th century had the right idea! The ungrateful commoners should be grateful we pay then at all.

    • 17
      Mornington Crescent says:

      Laws??? WTF???

      • 25
        George says:

        Despite having abused the expenses system, he’s okay on the economy (supporting tax cuts, cuts to public spending etc), though I’d rather a Libertarian Conservative

        • 71
          Mornington Crescent says:

          1. He’s a LibDem: not to be trusted.
          2. He’s a fucking thief and should be swinging – and I don’t mean from his boyfriend’s knob.

          Anything else is irrelevant.

        • 82

          Put me down for a Laws vote.
          He’s capable. And realistic.

          It makes the liberals responsible for the economy. It keeps the Tories, Lib Dem ‘Italian’ style allies from fleeing to the rear at the first sign of trouble.
          it makes them responsible.

          And Osborne ‘s last budget was even worse than McDoom’s 10p fiasco.

          The only reason chancellor’s are seen as for life, not just for Christmas, is Blair’s cowardice about removing the medicated monster.
          Any normal PM would have slung old drop jaw out.
          Another legacy of Blair’s Iraq adventure. The evil twin in the attic became immovable.

  7. 11
    John Prescott says:

    G4S, G4S, G4S ,G4S.

  8. 16
    Stobrith says:

    I think Norri Danddine has put her finger on it. “The most trusted politician in the country” is Hague……what a bloody mess we are in.

  9. 24
    Procrustes says:

    I see, Vince is a better option is he? ….Industry Secretary in the Callaghan administration -worked wonders there didn’t he?

    Chief Economist for Shell – a well paid weather forecaster and about as accurate…..

    Not sure what his position is on QE, fiscal stimulus or BoE independence as he has spoken for and against both.

    This is before we start examining Red Ed’s alternatives.

    Heaven help us – the lot of them have the economic competence of dead newt

    • 37
      If it's about experience says:

      Well actually yes. Vince is a much better proposition. Unlike Gideon, Vince has worked in the real world of work. You don’t become the chief economist at the Royal Dutch Shell company for nothing.

    • 72
      Undead Ken says:

      If it’s a newt you’re after, then I’m all yours. Does it matter that I’m not dead yet?

      Mind you, for that salary I could be tempted.

  10. 26
    George's safe word says:

    Louise!

  11. 27
    Liam Byrne says:

    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again-
    ” There’s no money left”.

  12. 28
    Anonymous says:

    It’s time for the pro-growth Eds to take over from Chancellor Zero and the Bullingdon PM.

    Keep up the pressure, Guido!

    • 60
      Only 17 days until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

      Mr Miliband said (July 23rd) that he and Mr Hollande were “in agreement in seeking that new way that needs to be found and I think can be found.”

      So Ed “pro-growth” Miliband doesn’t actually have any “plan B”. He doesn’t even know if there is a plan B.

      But he thinks there might be one. Perhaps.

      Stunning.

  13. 32
    Zero Hour says:

    • 42
      Zero Hour says:

      Look at the expressions on Harman and Jowell’s faces. Very subtle but you can see it’s a “another blunder!” look.

      • 59
        Anonymous says:

        Better 0% than the double dip Chancellor Zero left us with.

        If only the prudent PM were still in charge; he and the magnificent Darling took us through the global recession leaving the economy growing when the Bullingdon PM and Chancellor Zero took over. Now he is gone, we must, must give the reins over to his sucessors, the pro-growth Eds.

        • 68
          Only 17 days until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

          Out of idle curiosity, what colour is the sky on your planet?

        • 97
          Fish says:

          In reality we have been in recession since 2008. The temporary growth that we experienced in late 2009 to 2010 was an artificial boom paid for by extra borrowing (us) as Brown attempted to buy the election.

          I don’t think that Gideon has many options with what he inherited. Economists were quite clear in 2010 that the economic postion thathad been left was so apallingy dangerous that the impact would last a generation…and the urgent remedies needed meant that growth would be almost impossible to achieve in the short term.

          People seem to have short memories

          • Anonymous says:

            The lefties don’t want to know that Fish;they want us all to believe that the economic state of the country was wonderful until May 2010 & the position we are in now is solely the fault of the present goernment.
            Byrne was not kidding when he left the “there is no money”note.

          • Anonymous says:

            Even Guido agrees, attacking Chancellor Zero and the Bullingdon PM; trying to get the Tory toffs turfed out of power will only result in the pro-growth Eds getting on. Keep it up, Guido! We’ll get the pro-growth Eds in charge to save this country yet!

        • 113
          £38 - geddit? says:

          You are Polly Toynbee messaging from her balcony in Tuscany and I claim my £38

      • 98
        Anonymous says:

        Here’s another expression when PRESSING the FLESH:

        http://www.southwestbusiness.co.uk/southwestbusiness-co-uk/_img/Cameron_GVA.jpg

        Grin for the camera boys.
        And the Lobbyist is…. yes the same firm that describes itself as a property adviser.

        Article here: http://www.southwestbusiness.co.uk/news/26072012080912–5-5m-health-care-development-opened-by-pm/

        While the healthcare sector is struggling, there are still people (use the term loosely) making money out of the system, as they have with schools.

        INVESTIGATE GUIDO, PLEASE!

        http://www.propertyweek.com/data/analytics/property-week-analytics-explaining-healthcare-property/5039069.article?origin=EHC260712PWwebreg

  14. 40
    Gideon says:

    Look I’m well qualified to run the economy of the United Kingdom. I’ve got a degree in modern history and a place at the Bullingdon club.

  15. 46
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    John Redwood is the obvious wise old head we need in No. 11.

    Get on with it Dave.

    • 53
      The Tit in No 10 – the PR (Up The Bum) Pro He is says:

      As my credentials show, I talk out of my arse!

    • 114
      Widescreen2010 says:

      If you put that serial failure anywhere near Economic policy I will stop paying tax immediately.
      I once had the misfortune to work under Redwood’s ‘management’.
      Believe me, if he could manage to make a cup of tea without f*cking it up it would be a miracle.

    • 140
      Anonymous says:

      I’ll go for Peter Lilley – a physics graduate, fiscally sound and thinks all these green policies are hogwash. He also predicted that Brown’s deregulation of financial services would be a complete clusterfuck.None of this matching labour’s tax and spend policies that Gid and Dave tied themselves to.

  16. 47
    Anonymous says:

    Now is the time for somebody with a tad of experience, not little rich boys who have never worked or achieved anything in the real world!!
    A quick glance at some CV’s may just place David D

    • 50
      Axe The Telly Tax says:

      David Davis for Party Chairman i would support, as a good Thatcherite bruiser.

    • 62
      Anonymous says:

      Wow! Don’t know what happened there ! Sent before I was ready.
      Now is the time for somebody with a tad of experience, not little rich boys who have never worked or achieved anything in the real world!!
      A quick glance at some CV’s may just place David Davis at the forefront of the list. At least he’s been around a bit and has some REAL experience other than living off the family’s teat!!

  17. 54
    annette curton says:

    Vince Cable length (backstabber in chief) thinks he would make a good chancellor of the exchequer, and modestly agrees with other people who think the same, however he has no intention of taking on this role coz the other chap is doing very well under the circumstances, Ha,Ha,Ha!.

    • 70
      Baron Hogwash says:

      Vince needs to take his pension and P OFF, he’s spent two years of backstabbing and doing nothing for business but photoshoots for himself.

  18. 57
  19. 66
    Moussa Koussa says:

    So the Olympics ( very large scale public investment programme ) will generate £13bn for UK economy

    Well done Blair and Brown.

    • 74
      Engineer says:

      Maybe. The trouble is, the cost exceeds £13 billion, by a lot.

    • 77
      Anonymous says:

      Smoke and Mirrors dear boy, Smoke and Mirrors!

    • 80
      Only 17 days until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

      By ‘generate’ you mean, “cost”. As in, “these games cost us £13billion, and we had to borrow that £13billion, and we’ll be repaying that debt – and the interest – for 25 or so years.”

      Any other stunning investments made by Brown and his advisor Balls? Anything? You know, selling 395 tonnes of gold, maybe, at the bottom of the market, and using the money to buy euros?

      Anything like that?

    • 85
      annette curton says:

      Hmm, possible 8 gold (plated) medals for team GB = £13 billion of revenue, that’s gordonomics for you.

    • 102
      Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

      A nice young man on some piss-poor daytime television show mentioned that the organisers of The Olympics might need some career-advice and the audience started cackling, dear. Were they being paid to laugh inappropriately, do you think?

  20. 69
    Moussa Koussa says:

    BILLY BOY VAGUE !!!!

    Holy Jesus. You are dooooomed.

  21. 73
    BOY GEORGE says:

    Leave me alone, heres my message to you all!

    • 117
      David Bellendamy says:

      Has anyone ever met a real, live troll?

      • 191
        Knot a troll says:

        No but I’m going to be sending a few people that video who I believe are :O)

      • 192
        Little William Goat-Gruff says:

        Indeed I have and he threatened to eat me for supper – but my big brother came over the bridge and sorted him out. I have a clay representation magnet stuck to my fridge door now.

  22. 76
    Dave-------FAIL----- says:

    It’s all gone to hell in a handcart. Dave could not beat the worst PM and government in British history. So he teams up with Liberal Nick and they make homosexual marriage their number one priority, closely followed by covering the countryside with windmills and solar panels, reforming the second chamber which does not need reforming, proping up failing Euro states. Whilst taxing the UK citizen even more than Gordon did and spending more on the state than Gordon did.

    • 87
      Only 17 days until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

      You’d think Labour’s supporters would be deliriously happy with Dave, really. I suppose it’s a class thing. He’s continuing Brown’s policies, but he’s a bit too “silver spoony” for Labour’s liking.

    • 91
      Call me Dave says:

      Yes and I am mighty annoyed that Scotchland have beaten me to the Marriage thingy. I’ll just have to dream up a new project now.

      How about free school milk for the children of gay couples?

      • 99
        annette curton says:

        He could get in first with a bill to give all guide dogs a full state pension at age16 (70 dogs), ticks all the right boxes.

        • 101
          Call me Dave says:

          Spiffing, you are on the right tracks but I don’t like the idea of helping those that through no fault of their own cannot help themselves.

          I would sooner help someone who cant be arsed (I believe CBA is the acronym) to help themselves. So any suggestions to help the workshy would be most appreciated especially if they are also gayers.

  23. 96
    MB. says:

    It just seems mob mentality of trying to pick off a Cabinet member who seems vulnerable.

    If Balls had any sense he would play on Cable’s ego, praise him, quote him and claim he respects his opinions.

    • 110

      Ed Balls looks serious faced into the camera’s lens.
      “I think Vince Cable was right to have predicted the recession , {mouth begins to smile..much effort to maintain facial control}coming every year since 1963. He has been proved right. {snicker}

      He has a great intellect {chortle, chortle} and…and is one of the foremost economic gurus of out time. …. ”
      {Falls over backwards off his chair bellowing hysterical laughter.}

      Director says – OK Cut. Mr Balls, really if you’re not going to focus we could be here all day..Ok compose yourself. let’s try ‘Take 29′ everyone.

  24. 100
    Ed Balls says:

    Thank you for all the people saying I should be chancellor but at the moment I need to concentrate on winning the triple flip event at the Olympics as the gold medal I could win forms a major part of my financial strategy.

    Thanks for your support

  25. 105
    Pervyng King says:

    While he’s on the way out, we might as well get rid of Mervyn (I didn’t know anything about Libor fixing) King who has written more letters to explain why the UK interest rate is out of tolerance than Oscar Wilde (and with about the same degree of practicality). Quantitative easing is a ‘clever’ way of effectively devaluing your currency (without using that dreaded term) and if you don’t believe me look at the US dollar exchange rate and how little the Euro has dropped compared to the pound bearing in mind the colossal Euro woes.

    George messed up by NOT making real cuts, but by making cuts to INCREASES …. now George, that’s still an INCREASE, not a cut. Tory HQ have allowed Labour to get away with claiming its all cuts, but its not – expenditure is RISING.

    Eg – £100M being spent to vaccinate kids for flu. NHS says this will SAVE money as fewer old folks will go to hospital with flu. Yes, but if they are then still alive, they will go to hospital later WITH SOMETHING ELSE. Thus there will be NO SAVING it will COST money. The NHS is a bottomless pit – you can spend the whole of the world’s GDP in UK and PEOPLE WILL STILL DIE – accept it and be sensible and proportionate in spending to alleviate suffering, not prolong people’s sufferingl in a care home with nothing to look forward to.

    • 108
      Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:

      I claim all the credit for introducing quantitative easing to this Country.

    • 116
      Oscar Wilde says:

      I was imprisoned for my gentle easing.

  26. 112
    Foxymoron says:

    Can anyone tell me as to why Osborne got the Chancellorship other than through his close friendship with Cameron?
    And has Osborne taken a reduction is salary because of his ‘second job’ in strategy at Conservative HQ?

  27. 115
    Cherie Blair says:

    I love money

    • 174
      Tony says:

      I’ve transferred this months agreed amount into your personal account Cherie. It worries me when I see you frequenting these pages for fear of what you may say… errr darling.

  28. 118

    What about having a chancellor who has first hand experience in both the big corporate world and in running a small business, along with first hand knowledge of what it is like to be unemployed? Could make for better decision making.

    • 128
      jgm2 says:

      There’s nothing (or very little) to know.

      Live within your means.

      It’s that simple.

      The rest is just detail.

      • 148
        Engineer says:

        Yup, that’s pretty much it. I’d just add that Gummint should get out of the way and let the country get on with it.

        • 175
          Anonymous says:

          If they get out of the way then we don’t need them.
          If we don’t need them then we have no need for a pool of MPs from which we select government ministers.
          Then no need to reform HoL so get rid of that.
          I could go on but the Law of Unintended Consequences is pointing its finger towards me.

          • Engineer says:

            We DO need a parliament in which the nation’s matters of importance can be discussed. We DON’T need six million on the payroll doing – well, what, exactly? We DON’T need a huge raft of legislation making any potential employer wholly and completely liable for every last aspect of any potential employees’ lives. We DON’T need a massive influx of immigrants when the jobs available approximately corresponds the number of unemployed natives. We DON’T need a massive education establishment telling teachers what to do – we just need teachers and a few schools inspectors. And so on.

    • 129
      Dial P for Pickles says:

      Eric Pickles could do the job. He’s actually delivered what he said he would deliver and unlike Gideon, Dave and Billy, Eric is a Conservative.

  29. 120
    The Libor party says:
  30. 121
    National Socialist says:

    Osborne. An idiot among idiots.
    This just goes to show that blind commitment to an ideological position is no substitute for sound economic judgment.
    Let us be clear about this, our economy is sliding into the abyss because of one man’s inability to admit he was wrong.
    What a Tory.

    • 131
      jgm2 says:

      our economy is sliding into the abyss because of one man’s inability to admit he was wrong.

      That’s certainly true.

      I don’t think of the Maximum Imbecile as a ‘Tory’ though.

      • 142
        Gordon McDoom says:

        I was right all along!

        When you spend more than you take in , eventually no one will give a shit. And when the problem becomes too big to ignore, it will be someone else’s problem.

  31. 122
    Fish says:

    Impressed with Nadine’s. Loyalty, a Conservative value, and one she doesn’t possess.

    Of course the real reason for her disaffection aren’t the ‘posh boys’, it’s the probability that the democratic imperative for a much needed boundary review, will result in the loss of her seat. But, in whining Nadine’s world she thinks that she is more important than the people and their democractic right for all votes to count equally.

    Time for her to fuck off to UKIP, I think, and exit stage left.

  32. 130
    Jimmy says:

    He is chancellor of a one term government. He will screw this country up, but will he care? Will he fuck, he’s a multi-millionare who knows nothing about how the rest of the 99.9% of the population actually lives.

    • 133
      jgm2 says:

      While he has bedwetters such as yourself foaming at the mouth he must be doing the right thing.

    • 135
      Jimmy the Dhimmi says:

      As distinct from Gordon Brown.

    • 138
      A Tory says:

      Can’t see the problem you have with Gideon Jimmy. He’s just carrying on the work that Gordon started. It’s Conservative who have a problem with him.

    • 145
      Slippery Slope says:

      You really hate people who’ve got more money than you, don’t you?

      • 166
        jgm2 says:

        Except for Tony Blair and the Maximum Imbecile – those well-know charity workers. And of course Ken Livingston. The rich tax-avoider.

        Our tax-evaders are ‘more progressive’ than your tax-evaders kind of mentality.

        Our tax-evaders he*art*s are in the right place unlike your tax-evaders who are evil.

        Laughable.

      • 189
        Jimmy says:

        I hate no one with the possible exception of unfunny fake Jimmys

  33. 136
    David Cameron says:

    Ah ha
    Come and listen
    let me help you out of this mess
    have some fun

    don’t worry about paying tax, don’t worry about human rights, don’t worry about all those poor bastards

    Come and join me on my new tv programme ‘Escape From the Country’

    starts next week after the Olympics

    I can help you

  34. 137
    UNSKILLED WORKFORCE says:

    A huge problem with a Parliamentary democracy is that MP’s require no knowledge or qualifications to do any job in Parliament, no matter how important. Other than being clinically insane (and McBroon proves how mad you can be and still not be certified), anything goes. How strange then that MP’s pontificate on various subjects of which they often appear to be entirely innocent. They also insist on laws requiring qualifications and accreditation for doing many jobs. BANKING like PARLIAMENT does not seem to require ANY of the same … I wonder if the dearth of quality / truthfulness / ability is connected?

    • 153
      Foxymoron says:

      Are there no Gladstones any more?

      • 163
        Gladstone's Bag says:

        Don’t forget that in those days, there were no women MP’s, nor indeed did they have a vote. There were hardly any real commoners, seats were ‘bought’ – your workforce or tenants were told to vote for you.

  35. 139
    George Osborne says:

    I didn’t get where I am today by not working hard and fucking off just about everyone I know

    by the way, who is that politician who’s been a tad naughty and got caught – not like me, I’ll never get caught

  36. 144
    Jimmy says:

    Yeah – the right thing. Fucking the country up bigtime. Causing misery for millions. Looking after the rich.
    Is he looking after you jgm2?

  37. 149
    Foxymoron says:

    Osbourne’s policies are working just fine for his objectives. Its that that his objectives include the ruin of most of the rest of us.

  38. 152
    G BROWN our once and future PM says:

    That’s not fair. Nadine is very good at accounting

  39. 154
    jgm2 says:

    You’re being dragged into the bedwetter’s trap Guido. According to Andrew Neil ‘growth’ has been -0.3% since 2010. A grand total of about 5bn quid.

    During that time our annual deficit has gone down from 180bn to 160bn to 140bn quid. So we have lost 0.3% ‘growth’ but saved 60bn quid. The bedwetter’s ‘argument’ app*ears to be that we could have saved just (say) 50bn quid and generated +0.3% ‘growth’.

    Which is the utter fucking madness that got us into this predicament in the first place.

    The bedwetters claim seems to be that you cannot save yourself out of poverty. Which will come as news to the millions of UK voters who have managed to do precisely that during their own lifetime.

    LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS.

    Keep up the good work Osborne. Tell these jackasses with their comedy ‘growth’ strategies that involve pyramid borrowing to fuck off.

    • 165
      Engineer says:

      Osborne’s main opposition isn’t Labour and the BBC, it’s the Treasury mandarinate. They love high taxes, ‘cos it gives ‘em more of our money to play with. They also bend the knee to Brussels (well, suck the EU cock, more like). Ergo, they hate cuts.

      If Ossie spent a bit more time in the Treasury stamping on heads, and a bit less in number 10 on strategy, we’d have deficit reduction AND growth.

      • 169
        jgm2 says:

        Well we could have both right now since it app*ears that GDP has shrunk by a grand total of 5bn quid over two years but the combined deficit reductions are of the order of 60bn quid.

        So to achieve ‘growth’ Osborne had only to squander (say) an extra 5bn quid a year we don’t have and we’d have had 0.3% ‘growth’ over the last two years. But that remains the economics of the mad-house. Because every 5bn of deficit you don’t cut in one year is another 5bn of deficit that risks being run up every year in the future too.

        The problem aint the lack of borrowed ‘growth’. the problem remains the monstrous deficit.

        Cut harder. Cut deeper. Cut now.

    • 185
      Fish says:

      Hurrah JGM. Post of the day, sorry week.

      • 195
        Hilda Scruggs says:

        Yes indeed. It should be compulsory reading for all the effwits at the BBC, Guarian and “Independent”, especially Peston, Grimley and Flanders (sounds like a music hall comedy duo).

  40. 171
    Captain Pugwash says:

    George has actually been rather too wet and has been hampered by the continuing influx of immigrants. The housing ‘crisis’ seems oddly to equate to the number of immigrants Bliar let in – how strange. There is something more that George could do however. We in UK have considerable, unemployed, shipbuilding skills and could and should be mobilising them. What we need is to develop a modular class of warship (which brings premium skill jobs) and also metal-bashing skills. Whilst the two new aircraft carriers display our skills as a nation (although they should be catobar), the potential export market is very small. So what we need is a multi-purpose hull with modular high tech units which would simultaneously provide the RN with some ships to protect the aircraft carriers (and employment for the ridiculous number of admirals we have). We would then have a class of destroyer etc which could then be exported getting REAL MONEY into the economy. The RN has shot itself in the foot by acquiring ridiculously expensive warships which virtually no one else could afford (nor can we) so industry has no export market. These expensiove £1BN destroyers we are getting are a handful of ships and despite the claims, an adversary surprise attack could overwhelm them. Too few ships, too expensive bad planning by Navy.

  41. 178
    Economisist says:

    GDP is a crude measure of economic ACTIVITY. Trouble is, it does not differentiate between useful and wasteful activity. As trading nation with few realisable natural resources for export these days we have to rely on getting exports to bring in money and they should exceed imports – that is the simple equation. As a nation we import far more (including immigrants) than we export. This is because we have had wet liberal policies for decades. NHS and Benefits are the road to ruin – affordable in the good times, needing to be cut down to size in the bad times.

    IVF – the world and UK is overpopulated – great idea! …..etc

  42. 180
    National Socialist says:

    Just what do we get for the £157m a day we pay the EU?

  43. 183
    Jimmy says:

    The funny thing is that all you people who voted for him still think your opinions are worth posting.

  44. 190
    joanna public says:

    Dear Coalition:

    Love, joanna x

  45. 196
    Jimbo says:

    The squeaky voiced chancelloris complete failure as is Cameron, both should be serving full time under the LibDem flag ie. in the useless brigade.
    Where are the proper Conservatives to allow this to happen, both need sacking.

    The only way out of this recession is for Britain to get out of the EU, take off the shackles, get rid of Red Tape, close the door to immigration and repatriate all immigrants on Benefits. Then just watch the economy grow, whilst Europe will still be struggling. The Cameron Regime id denying the British Public its democratic rights by not allowing a referendum on Europe so it is time for the true Conservatives to get some guts and get rid of the terrible two, make that three, get rid of Haigue as well the little pratt.

    • 202
      micawber says:

      Osborne and Hague have to do what a man’s gotta do and not get flustered with negative comment from whatever the source.- journalist, opposition or own party.
      I must agree Cameron is a bit of a failure but then two out of three ain’t bad.
      To live in a land of pipe dreams where at a stroke decades of incompetance can be resolved at the drop of a hat would appear naieve.

    • 205
      Marion the cat says:

      I often wonder what would happen if we agreed to pay unemployment benefits in Pakistan itself – to those that were prepared to go back there, £70 odd quid would go much further in Lahore than in Moseley.

      • 206
        Marion the cat says:

        I often wonder what would happen if we agreed to pay unemployment benefits in P*k*land itself – to those that were prepared to go back there, £70 odd quid would go much further in Lahore than in Moseley. Just a silly try to get round the modbot.

  46. 199
    mark Wouters says:

    HELLO,
    Theres more economic growth on morrisons cooked chicken then there will ever be with this Con-dem Shambloic excuse for a government,Bring back Harrold wilson !

  47. 201
    Anonymous says:

    Thank God we know there isn’t the remotest possibility of Cable taking any sort of reins – least of all Osborne’s.

  48. 203
    MandyPickleSniffer says:

    I was just at Chessington with the kids, and I could’ve sworn I saw Ed Balls walking past, eating an ice cream cone. Can anyone else confirm this?
    Not that I give a hoot, but just found it odd….kinda thought he’d be back in London plotting how to take over from Milliband, or trying to figure out how to replace his annoying flatline gesture for PMQs, now that we’re actually in a nosedive!


Media Reader

Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Mirror’s Lazy Lie | Guardian
Mirror’s Weeping Child Picture Lying Lazy Journalism | Guardian
Coulson: Everything You Need to Know in 6 Seconds | MediaGuido
BBC Still Loves the Guardian | Breitbart
Establishment Times Chums Appeasing Tory Europhiles | UKIP
Andrew Pierce v Owen Jones | MediaGuido
Michael Rosen’s Expert Opinions | MediaGuido
Metro Editor Leaves | Buzzfeed
Local News Stories That Rocked The World | Poke


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Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”



orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?


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