July 25th, 2012

Osborne Denies He Has Strategy

Speculation is mounting this afternoon that George Osborne has been relieved of his role as Tory party strategy chief. When asked earlier if he had given up the role the Chancellor revealed: “I only have one job“.

Guido put it to Osborne’s people that their man no longer holds the stategy role within the Conservative Party. His spokesman said: “He’s only ever had one role – Chancellor. Not signalling any change“. That explains it…


A No.11 source gets in touch in regard to Osborne being in strategy meetings: “There’s nothing wrong with having a Prime Minister and Chancellor who get on and work together. The last lot could barely speak to each other and look where that got us!


  1. 1
    Aye says:

    Ozzy Needs to start cutting!

    • 4
      Anonymous says:

      They’ve already cut and decimated the UK economy with the deepest double dip ever, as predicted by the pro-growth Eds. Time to get people with real economic understanding in charge – election now! Vote for the pro-growth Eds!

      • 9
        Alistair Darling says:

        That’ll be Gordon’s legacy you are referring to.

        • 12
          Pawn Sandwich says:

          You are one chancellor that I felt sorry for, you walked straight into Gordon Brown’s clusterfuck. You should have turned the job down.

          • What would the political cost have been of ignoring the promise to keep to Labour’s spending plans, I wonder?

            Much less than the other dropped policies, I would bet.

            Instead of abolishing quangos, he could have simply removed their funding. Headless chickens would have lasted longer.

          • The next PM after this Idjit says:

            It’th all tho eethy peethy! I’m thure Dave wanth me to take over!

        • 24
          Anonymous says:

          The prudent PM’s legacy was to steer us through the world recession and deliver more growth, promptly destroyed by the Tory toffs coming in and favouring their banker chums with tax cuts and spending cuts.

          The pro-growth Ed’s will get us back on the straight and narrow to growth by reversing it. Guido clearly agrees, hence his excellent work on trying to damage the Tories and their “Chancellor Zero” (good one Guido!). If the Tories lose the next election, only Labour and the pro-growth Eds can win.

          • Pawn Sandwich says:

            Well said, comrade.

          • Anonymous says:

            Here’s a fucking good hint on how to get us out of this mess…

            NOW YOU PAY £750 A YEAR TO BE IN THE EU


          • Engineer says:

            You are aware that Guido is criticising Osborne for not delivering deeper public spending cuts, tax cuts, and deregulation to allow the private sector to power ahead, aren’t you? Guido is not in favour of more tax, more borrowing and more public debt. Neither are we.

          • Plan B is sack Osborne says:

            Here’s a hint on how to cut our costs…

            NOW YOU PAY £750 A YEAR TO BE IN THE EU


          • Archer Karcher says:

            Spending cuts?

            What planet are you living on? Spending is up above even Browns ruinous levels. Get your head out of your arse, you tribalist plonker.

          • Anonymous says:

            “You are aware that Guido is criticising Osborne for not delivering deeper public spending cuts, tax cuts, and deregulation to allow the private sector to power ahead, aren’t you? Guido is not in favour of more tax, more borrowing and more public debt. Neither are we.”

            Pull the other one. If the Tories lose the next election, Labour and the pro-growth Eds return.Elsewhere Guido is doing his best to link the Tories with Coulson, NOTW et al. It’s not just about ecomomics. Guido’s underlying motives are hence clear.

          • pissed off voter says:

            When Brown entered government he was a pauper and the country was prosperous, when he left government he was a millionaire and the country was destitute.

          • Jen The Blue says:


            That’ll be the Gordon Broon economic theory that states we should borrow when the economic conditions are benign, and borrow when they are not.

            At what point do we pay back the borrowing?

      • 17
        misterned says:

        We have had 15 years of non-stop Blairite corporatism. The coalition economic plan is less than 1% different from Alistair Darling’s plan. the inconvenient fact is that the coalition are spending and taxing MORE than labour did and we are still suffering labour’s recession because of it.

        The problem is not conservative economics. In fact, it cannot possibly be conservative economics, because we haven’t fucking tried any yet!!!

        In spite of their barely noticeable cuts, they are slowly getting the deficit down, but without supply side stimulus through tax cuts and a massive reduction in business red tape, (which would require us to leave the rotten and bloated and corrupt sinking ship known as the EU), we are stuck with labour’s legacy of failure, recession, depression, and more failure.

        • 34
          viv says:

          Dear Misterned

          Thank you so much for making me laugh. I despair of either side ever doing anything constructive and us ever getting out of recession, but loved your second paragraph.

          Brilliant post.

          • misterned says:

            How have they even tried anything to do with freeing up markets? increasing competition, significantly reducing regulations on business? breaking up corrupt cartel-like corporatism in our economy?

            They have continued labour’s plan, but tinkered with the edges of it a bit.

            Suggesting that the coalition’s plan is right wing or conservative is utterly delusional.

          • misterned says:

            If my last post sounded like an attack on viv, that was not intentional. Thank you for liking my post.

          • Pawn Sandwich says:

            It was a dark and stormy night and the bonfire of the quangos could not be lit, the matches were wet.

          • SP4BS says:

            Clearly we need a Match Tsar

      • 18
        Engineer says:

        Growth how, though? False growth by borrowing is no growth at all, just kicking the can down the road.

      • 38
        Forkbender says:

        I think not it did notwork first time round. what it needs is a neutral government that can foresee the possible effects of their actions hence steer away from things that will bear too much on one side or another, not just going for party dogma that both sides of the 2 main political parties. The UK has been hit on three sides the USA, the UK itself and then the omni shambles of the Euro countries

        • 122
          porn sandwich says:

          ron jeremy for pm

          we ve had a bunch of knobs

          at least he d be a real big swinging dick

      • 120
        percy thrower says:

        is pro growth eds a competitor to bio gro compost

      • 126
        Four-eyed English Genius says:

        What a silly thing to say, it worked so well last time, didn’t it?

    • 6
      Dave says:

      I’m not aware that we have either a policy or a strategy.

    • 71
      Liarpoliticians says:

      We can’t cut, we NEED to borrow £10bn+ for spying on everyone’s internet connections. Knowing what you people think about on oder-order and Twitter and what p0rno websites you visit will help us in economic recovery…. of our friends in EADS, BT, Lucent, Crapita etc. etc.

      This economic collapse has been bought to you by the biggest fraudsters in the UK, the Bank of England, and the British government (LibLabCon).

      Buy gold, silver, and lots of cans of baked beans, while your worthless paper money can buy you stuff.

      • 124
        linda lovelace says:

        i visit metrosexual prostitutes dot com

        is that all you want to know

        save yourself ten billion … just ask

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Keep the pressure on, Guido – we’ll get the pro-growth Ed’s back in control yet and reverse the damage done by these Tory toffs.

    • 21
      Pawn Sandwich says:

      The damage was done on Gordon Brown’s shift.

      • 70
        Anonymous says:

        The prudent PM left office with the economy growing after the world wide recession. The Tory toffs have left it in tatters after just two years. For the sake of our children’s future, we need the pro-growth Eds in charge to reverse the disasterous course the Tories have chosen.

        • 86
          Tough guy like Putin says:

          is this the Ed who looked like a spastic in a bombblast when out running?

          • stephes segall says:


            he s the one who looked like me about to have a heart attack whilst playing football

            but without the ponytail …..

        • 89
          Liarpoliticians says:

          There has not been a world-wide recession, there was a downturn created by the G20 and experienced by the G20, due to the massive amount of fraud by politicians and their banking friends.

        • 94
          Pawn Sandwich says:

          You really are delusional. You should play a greater role in Labour politics. The country needs people like you.

    • 22
      Engineer says:

      How do we reverse the damage done by Gurning Gordon and his excessive borrowing?

    • 26
      pissed off voter says:

      God forbid. But then there is our problem – a choice of shit or shit

    • 27
      misterned says:

      You mean the double delusional deficit denying eds, don’t you? Those fuckwits who thought that they could borrow our way out of debt, then piss all the money away trying to buy a client state and then dump the country into several decades worth of austerity?

      Those Eds?

      They got us INTO this mess you fuckwit!

      • 46
        SP4BS says:

        you werent listnening, when they said “we’ll pay all this back from the future growth that will come from our investment”.

        See, some day it would all be alright.

      • 106
        Anonymous says:

        The pro-growth Eds along with proper economists like David Blanchflower warned the Tories that they would decimate the economy with their cuts. And so it proved. We need the pro-growth Eds in power to reverse the damage done.

  3. 3
    Jimmy says:

    “He’s only ever had one role – Chancellor.”

    I think I may have identified the problem.

    • 62
      Archer Karcher says:

      A broken clock is always right twice a day Jimmy and up you pop to prove just that. Osborne is crap, though I suspect you and I agree for different reasons.

    • 83

      So clearly you agree that Labour’s spending plans were wrong?

      (Those ones that Osborne stuck to.)

  4. 5
    Forkbender says:

    I think it says it all about Gideon “Osborne Denies He Has Strategy”

  5. 7
    RK says:

    Guido’s closing quotation marks are always the wrong way around.

  6. 8
    We need to know! says:

    “Guido put it to Osborne’s staff”

    But what Guido, Currently in French land Guido? Neo Guido or Media Guido?

  7. 10
    Eileen Critchley says:

    True Tories hope for an election in 2013 with Labour winning a small majority.

    That will give us a chance to clear out these useless toffs and their equally useless cabal of pollsters and PR types once and for all.

    • 25
      Quickness says:

      There is one cosolation: the British people love to be crapped upon. Born servile, fawning and obsequious, the British love the feel of a toffs boot on their throat–and there’s plenty more of that to come yet.

  8. 11
    Jess The Dog says:

    Can we have Ozzy Osbourne in No 11 instead?

  9. 13
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    The strategy is for later right now we need to concentrate on tick tacks or whatever its called

  10. 14
    Anonymous says:

    it’s like the old saying “2 Ed’s are better than Gideon”

    • 72
      Forkbender says:

      Therefore 1 Ed is <1 Gideon

    • 77
      Archer Karcher says:

      Would the two Ed’s be, Ed “there should be no winners” Balls and Ed “£780 billion climate tax” Miliband? Believe me, if that’s all Labour have, they are thankfully, le fu’cked.

  11. 15
    Wee Willie says:

    Where’s the growth?

  12. 16
    Childe Gideon to the Dark Tower came says:

    My first thought was, he lied in every word,
    That hoary cripple, with malicious eye
    Askance to watch the working of his lie
    On mine, and mouth scarce able to afford
    Suppression of the glee, that pursed and scored
    Its edge, at one more victim gained thereby

  13. 19
    Gary Jones says:

    Best weapon in Labours arsenal is this incompetent shit, he is not capable of doing a weekend job at Boots

  14. 23
    Pestonomics says:
    • 32
      misterned says:

      So labour fucked the economy and the coalition have not fixed it yet.

      • 78
        Archer Karcher says:

        It’s worse than that mrned, the Coalition show no signs of even wanting to fix it and that’s the real problem.

    • 37
      Anonymous says:

      Growth before the Tory toffs, contraction and stagnation after. We need the pro-growth Eds back in power as soon as possible to reverse all the Conservatives have done to the hard working people of the UK.

      • 80
        Anonymous says:

        Fuck off, Gordon.

      • 81
        Archer Karcher says:

        The Conservatives have done nothing of value, like cutting spending and taxes. All they have done is fart around at the margins hoping for a miracle and pissed even more money than McRuin around, on useless socialist shite.

      • 134
        Mine d'Boggles says:

        That’s it!

        Perpetual Growth. I knew there was a way and it is so simple. Perpetual Growth.

    • 42
      Anonymous says:

      Erm…errors can be in any direction, Robert?

  15. 29
    Quickness says:

    Prior to being chancellor, Gideon Osborn has had one job: a shelf stacker in a supermarket. Now then, given his work history, how exactly did the well-connected, aristocratic millionaire get the Chancellor’s job?

    Britain: We’re all in this together . . . (“LOL” trad. arr D. Cameron).

    • 53
      SP4BS says:

      Err no. he wasn’t a shelf stacker. He was a towel folder. Theres about as big a difference there as between a brain surgeon and a hospital porter.

    • 64
      Engineer says:

      There are several current and recent senior politicians having almost no life experience. For example, Gordon Brown (experience – writing a history of the Scottish Labour Party from 1920 to 1925 or thereabouts), Ed Milliband (student activist and political researcher), David Cameron (PR wonk for about ten minutes), and many others.

      The idea of having politicians with some experience of something in the real world seems to elude our major political parties, to the detriment of all of us.

      • 74
        SP4BS says:

        Note Miss Smith, below. Graduated and became a management consultant.

        How’s that work? “here’s a book I read last week, you should read it too?”

      • 76
        Forkbender says:

        Yup, spoken like an engineer

  16. 30
    More to the point says:

    Is Chloe Smith a rug muncher?

  17. 31
    SP4BS says:

    I heard them mentioning Vince on radio 4 a minute ago. I tittered when I thought what bile that could cause to flow round these parts.

    However, I wondered – If he’s just there with his calculator and stuff, doing what he’s told, why not. And if as you say, theres no strategy involved in that, would it make any difference whether he’s a libdem. I mean if you’re a shelf stacker, the shelf is still full of beans at the end of the day (well, night perhaps), whether you think they should go in the first aisle, or next to the kippers.

  18. 48
    Fire up the Quattro says:

    Just had kippers for lunch. Lovely.

  19. 55
    Lord Oldshit says:

    I want Incapable Vince to be Chancellor and I want Chris Hoon and David Laws in the Cabinet NOW. Otherwise I’ll be on the telly ALL DAY LONG

  20. 59
    the treasury's briefs says:

    if you look at the 10 year rates the uk is minimal compared to the euro nightmares and doubtless we are suffering trade wise but Osborne is
    correct to keep focused on growth incentives.

  21. 79

    Very worried about this Twitter development.

    If someone there size can be browbeaten, how safe are we here. I am going to have to be much more circumspect, starting now.

    John Mann MP is a wanker

  22. 84
    Treasury The Games Accounts (Mis)Management Office Spokesperson says:

    The Treasury (The Games Accounts 2012) are pleased to advise we have now been informed by “Securely Controlled Accounts Management” SCAM for short. That all invoices relating to the numerous construction projects have now been fully settled via the main SCAM account in there nominated bank located in Mexico as per their letter of instructions we received from them in January 2010. This has saved the Treasury millions of pounds & man hours so its been agreed all Games Refurbishment Project invoices will be settled by the same method as per the Jan 2010 agreed procedures rules. Total monies transferred to date to the SCAM account are £87Billion Pounds, we would like to sincerely like to put on record our thanks to SCAM for all of there kind patient help in implementing this agreed procedure to make it as easy as possible to transfer the funds within the given time scale which has been of benefit to the Treasury & needless to say UK Tax Payers without who none of this would be possible. We are certain all UK citizens will give SCAM a huge round of applause for what they have achieved if only all infrastructure projects were settled in the same way this would really benefit the country.

    • 114
      From Inside the Bowels of the Treasury says:

      IF you think this was just a spoof & only a good laugh…LOL…

      I know whats coming sooner….. than you think……

      This is just the real tip of the Iceberg of Fiscal Incompetence

      on a Titanic scale that goes on everyday here….. !!

      something that a certain “G.B” moulded into a huge pile of stinking excrement

      right from 1997 to 2010 !! and has just been picked up & carried over since

      2010 GE by this current shower of public school wankers………..

  23. 92
    Hitler Presents the weather says:

  24. 104
    Time 2 CTRL, ALT & DEL says:

    Cut Cut Cut & Cut

    Cut spending
    Cut taxes
    Cut Regulation
    Cut loose from this liberal Elite

    last leave the EU


  25. 115
    alexander search says:

    “the last lot could barely speak to each other and look where that got us”

    It kept us out of the euro

  26. 117
    *waves* says:


  27. 121
    David Brede says:

    Not sure which job he is best at!

    Most people would not trust him to make the tea!

  28. 131
    Jimmy says:

    “There’s nothing wrong with having a Prime Minister and Chancellor who get on and work together. The last lot could barely speak to each other and look where that got us!“

    The longest uninterrupted period of growth in 200 years?

    We certainly seem to be dodging that bullet.

    • 135
      Trahison des Clercs says:

      Growth? kicking can down the road,eh Jimmy. Better kick in your thick head. Don’t hold your breath.

  29. 133
    Jimbo says:

    I never honestly thought that anyone could worse than Brown but the record has been broken.
    Possibly if the Government spent less on illegal wars and Foreign aid,bailing Banks out then we could look forward to a better economy. It is time to get rid of Osbourne and Cameron, neither is fit for purpose. They are both pro EU politicians and being so are traitors to this Country.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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