It’s uncanny…

The BBC is running a brilliant graphic this afternoon illustrating the worst offenders of memory lapses during the Leveson Inquiry. Bottom of the pile – below such trustworthy characters as Rupert and James Murdoch and the recently-charged Rebekah Brooks and Andy Coulson – comes our worryingly forgetful Prime Minister. That doesn’t look good…

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After Occupy tramp Bryn Phillips lied to get on the ballot at the upcoming City of London by-election, you would think he would try to stay on the right side of the law. This rioter, who was recently found guilty of violent disorder and burglary, is hilariously trying to stand on a moral platform.

He’s not too hot on the law though and failed to declare his conviction on his ballot submission.

Guido would now like to introduce him to some new legislation - Section 66 of the 1983 Representation of the People Act. That’s the bit that  that forbids “any statement relating to the way in which voters have voted at the election” being made before polls close.

So perhaps bonkers Bryn could explain his latest Twitter outpouring:

1/2 Postal votes are out in force for me already, messages of support from disgruntled bankers are flooding in…—
Bryn Phillips (@bryn__phillips) July 24, 2012

Labour MP Kerry McCarthy was cautioned for an identical crime during the last election. Either Bryn is lying, and he has not seen the postal votes, or he has broken the law. Which is it?

By admitting that she sends her daughter to a private school, Janet Murray – one of the Guardian‘s top education journalists, has triggered plenty of hand-wringing today.  Murray tells of her difficulty at walking her five-year-old walk to school in a “straw blazer and boater”, comparing herself to that paragon of virtue Diane Abbott for putting her child before her career. Annoying when those pesky lefty ideals get in the way of reality eh?

The education world is certainly surprised by Murray’s Damascene conversion and she’s getting it in the neck from the left and the right. Murray ends her mea culpa to the left by passionately imploring:

“I plan to send Katy to a state secondary if I can, but if I find myself dissatisfied with what is on offer, I will go private again. Until local schools meet families’ needs and cater for each individual child, can you blame people for putting their hand in their pocket?“

Welcome to the real world Janet.

“I am extremely disappointed by the CPS decision today. I will fight these allegations when they eventually get to court, but I would like to say one thing today about the Milly Dowler allegations. Anyone who knows me or who’s worked with me would know that I wouldn’t, and more importantly that I didn’t, do anything to damage the Milly Dowler investigation. At the News of the World we worked on behalf of the victims of crime, particularly violent crime, and the idea that I would then sit in my office dreaming up schemes to undermine investigations is simply untrue.”

His trial is likely to coincide with the last few months of an election campaign.

Guido imagines there are people sitting in offices dreaming up schemes to undermine that fact right now…

Neville Thurlbeck comes out fighting:

“Following today’s announcement that I am to be charged in relation to Operation Weeting, I would like to thank my family and friends for their undying support during the past 15 months. My thanks also to my lawyer Henri Brandman for his wise and calm counsel during the police investigation.

I am most surprised and disappointed in the outcome. I have always operated under the strict guidance and advice of News International’s lawyers and under the instructions of the newspaper’s editors which will be abundantly clear when this matter comes to court.  I will vigorously fight to clear my reputation. Neither I nor my lawyer will be making any further comment at this stage.”

Coulson statement expected within the hour…

So I will be leaving @TotalPolitics mid-August to join the Sky News team at Millbank as a producer. #newjob #needahaircut—
Amber Elliott (@amberelliott) July 24, 2012

One to watch…

Now Guido is no body language expert, but you don’t have to be to work out who hates each other here…

Video via LiarPoliticians