July 20th, 2012

Friday Caption Competition (Ban Ki Brown UN Envoy Edition)


168 Comments

  1. 1

    “Mr Glayson. I big fan of your show. Shut that door! Velly funnee! “

    Like

  2. 2
    Nan Taylor says:

    “And then I sucked Tony’s shit to a point, like this”

    Like

  3. 3
    Jesus Christ says:

    “Gordon gives Ban Ki the kiss of death”

    Like

  4. 5
    Dave Bruce says:

    I don’t do tongues on the first date mr brown

    Like

  5. 7
    Anonymous says:

    Two 52’s, a 69, Egg fried rice, and extra prawn crackers, please.

    Oh, and she’s paying…

    Like

    • 114
      Gordon 'Smiler' Brown says:

      Yes Sir!
      That’ll be 20 billion Euros please. Make the cheque out to Germany, it’ll save time.

      Like

  6. 8
    Anoneumouse says:

    Do you want to see some puppies?

    Like

  7. 9
  8. 11
    Gordon Brown (Retd.) says:

    Yes, I bought my bride, but she’s not Thai…

    Like

  9. 14

    Yes! Yes! Know punchline! Some clunt tlying to whistle?

    Like

  10. 15
    Charlie the Chump says:

    I wuv oo wittle chinky winky

    Like

  11. 17

    Mr Brown, when you said you had something ‘really big’ to show me, I assumed it was going to be your debts.

    Like

  12. 20
    Gonk says:

    “That’s it, just blow and hey presto Roger Whittaker. Well done Mr. Brown.”

    Like

  13. 23
    W V M says:

    “Whooo Banki I did a whoopsie on my shift”

    Like

  14. 24

    I had to change my name. Now I’m Ban Ki Co-Op

    Like

  15. 25
    Gonk says:

    “Oops, don’t tell me you ended up in a broom cupboard too “

    Like

  16. 26

    Gordon invites Ban to come naked short selling.

    Like

  17. 27
    Ban-ki Wastes all your money at UN says:

    Ah sool..!!.. your not normal like us then!!………Mr Browne

    Like

  18. 28
    The Old Brown Co*ck Suc*ker says:

    No …Not here Gordon….I believe we are being watched !!

    Like

  19. 29
    Anonymous says:

    Try finding a picture of UN SG Ban ki moon, rather than the Chinese Premier. Or do they all look the same you plonker?

    Like

  20. 30

    Is that a Brown Bess musket you have in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?

    Like

  21. 31
    Gonk says:

    ” You’re completely right, that new MG is fucking shit “

    Like

  22. 32
    olddicky says:

    Mr Brown I not like Peter Mandelson. I only kiss ladees.

    Like

    • 100
      Gordon 'Smiler' Brown says:

      Nobody likes Mandelson, it’s quite disconcerting to look around and see it’s him, I can tell you… and it’s pronounced ladd-ies.

      Like

  23. 33
    ToonBob... says:

    Pucker one’s lips to give a blow job to a Korean with a little willie, perhaps?

    Like

  24. 35
    Gordon from Outside of the Closet says:

    This is how I pursed my lips when I forced myself to kiss Tony’s
    annal regions…..How about you ??

    Like

  25. 36
    Stepney says:

    The clunking kiss that precedes famine, pestilence and disaster.
    (Trad. Malaysian Saying).

    Like

  26. 37
    Loungelizard says:

    Brown….Just on my way to Denver, thought I’d take in the new Batman film.

    Like

  27. 38
    Philip McArthur says:

    ” Ah Mr Brown, I see you have been sampling the schoolchildren already!”

    Like

  28. 39
    ToonBob... says:

    It is easy to confuse ‘em…… this is Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao ??

    Like

  29. 40
    Gonk says:

    ” No, I don’t think I’ve ever tried dog”

    Like

  30. 42
    Bob"Rough" Diamond says:

    Gord to Ban Ki

    ” You give marvellous hand jobs,sweetie”

    Like

  31. 43

    And when do you expect growth to reappear, Mr Blown?

    Like

  32. 44
    Anti Fabian says:

    Ban Ki Moon meets Wan Ky Loon

    Like

  33. 47
    Where's Lady Ashton when you need her says:

    Mr Who-ever-you-are, I’m thinking of giving up my seat – are you interested?

    Like

  34. 48
    I'm not Ban-ki-Moon either says:

    Slorry I’ve heard all about you are a very tight Jock Git, but you have to pay for this rentboy yourself………$dollars or gold bars only……!!

    Like

  35. 51
    gildedtumbril says:

    A pair of moons.

    Like

  36. 54
    Gordon Brown says:

    You plenty like me suck you off

    Like

  37. 55
    (I've been renamed) DA-Notice says:

    Gordon’s wide-mouthed frog joke punchline gets lost in translation.

    (Did you hear the one about Gordon, & 2 trannies, in a car, in Scotland? No? DA-Notice.)

    Like

  38. 56
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    “A pleasure to meet you, Reverend Moon! My father was a reverend, too!

    Like

  39. 57
    Harry Krishna says:

    Do you think this is better than the big gulp I used to do

    Like

  40. 58
    Aunty Matter says:

    Gordon has always enjoyed a good Moon.

    Like

  41. 59

    Premier Wen: I took my country from a third world, economically stagnant, communist party elite, centrally planned basket case, into possibly the wealthiest nation in the entire world.

    Gordon Brown: That’s a coincidence. I did the exact opposite.

    Like

  42. 60
    Bliars (Non) Ethical Spokesperson says:

    These are not just any puckered up Queer’s Lips

    These really are Gordon Browne’s UN Bum..Boy’s only Queer Lips

    Like

  43. 61
    Mister E says:

    Kiss Kiss, Ban Ban

    Like

  44. 62
    Arthur George Kamya says:

    Oh come off it!!! Aint hard at all to differentiate Ban Ki Moon (Korean) from Wen Jiabang (Chinese PM). And no, I am not Asian. This is definitely PM (Grandpa) Wen. This particular Friday caption is more a pun on Guido and his readers than on GB. Not funny, indicative 0f monumental ignorance. Maybe time to throw in the towel on this one…eh…NeoGuido????

    Like

    • 68
      JH says:

      ‘Throwing in the towel’ is clearly an insult to Germans – RACIST! Delete your post immediately, and never raise your head again.

      God, this is easy. I can see why it appeals to lefties.

      Like

      • 71
        Sigourney says:

        Gordon thought that his Larry Adler impression would help him with the UN job as he had been told Ban was a big fan but unfortunately his meeting was with the Chinese PM

        Like

  45. 63
    Sigourney says:

    Ban was very impressed with Gordon’s Larry Adler impressions

    Like

    • 66
      Sigourney says:

      “you do know how to whistle, don’t you ? You put your lips together and blow”

      Like

      • 82
        Gordoom Brown says:

        oh I can blow alright.
        I’ve blown billions. I just called it investment.

        Like

        • 98
          The English Collective Sad*ism Electors says:

          You would call it Investement you fcuking numskull jock annal reject……

          But we are the stupid fcuking asr*se holes that let you carry on doing it

          to us for 13 fcuking years……..

          and then allow Heir to Bl*iar to carry on doing the same…….

          Like

  46. 64
    Maximus says:

    Gt Scotch McBusturd – “So tell me, how high is a Chinaman really?”

    Like

  47. 69
    mitch says:

    Gordon attempts to use the power of his mind to attract a new mate.

    Like

  48. 70
    Steve Miliband says:

    Tonight Banki, I am going to be Larry Grayson

    Like

  49. 72
    Ah! Monika says:

    Say after me ” Wwwwwwwwwwanker “

    Like

  50. 74
    Steve Miliband says:

    ..Korea? I thought you said Career.

    Like

  51. 75
    pol says:

    Ban ki – “Ha! Success! Bet Tories wish they’d thought of adding superglue to your lip salve!”

    Like

  52. 77
    Nobby Nobbler says:

    “Ooh, suit you!”

    Like

  53. 79
    Bluebird says:

    Gordon says: “Pick me sir. I wreck your country long time. Only twenty dollar.

    Like

  54. 80
    Steve Miliband says:

    The caption contest that should have been……

    Weird, vacant political geek meets…….. Ed Miliband

    Like

  55. 83
  56. 84
    Deng Xiao Poofter says:

    Hurro Sairor !

    Like

  57. 86
    Steve Miliband says:

    Spanish bonds through the ceiling.

    Like

    • 89

      On the upside you can get 1.29 to the euro almost anywhere.

      Like

    • 90
      April from the Gents Comfort Room Cubical says:

      No don’t know that one ?

      Can you whistle it & I will try to play along

      with my big pounding Euro Organ…….

      Feel free to lend a hand…….Two are better than one……!!

      Like

  58. 92
    Old Blue Eyes says:

    Gordon – “Seems like a nice boy”

    Like

    • 107
      Hairy ' arry Hollocks from the Jon O'Gouts Party Office Excutive says:

      Thought you just luved New York…..so fcuk off back there quick

      this bit*ch is mine & always will be

      Like

  59. 93
    Webwrights says:

    When you were talking about BURMA, I hope you really meant Be Upstairs Ready, My Angel.

    Like

    • 102
      Jock the Misunderstood Keltic RentBoy says:

      and add “World Trade Japan Office Verification” but really mean “With the Jar of

      Vaseline” that should help to ease my large caper in quickly……

      Like

  60. 95
    Button Moon says:

    Gordon: Hello ducky!

    Premier Wen: You want special orange sauce with that?

    Like

  61. 101
    tauntonian says:

    Would you like to swing on a star
    carry moonbeams home in a jar
    and be better off than you are
    or would you rather be a mule?
    (lyric)

    Like

  62. 104
  63. 105
    Laughing Out Loud says:

    Kiss Me Quick, and I’ll show you how to screw the British!

    Like

  64. 106
    Owen Jones says:

    I can be the kiss of death for ANY economy.

    Like

  65. 108
    Anthony Blanche says:

    Brown shows off his anus impression that went down so well with Mandy

    Like

  66. 109
    Baldy says:

    Wen: “So what can Scotland offer as collateral for such a large loan?”

    Brown: “England.”

    Like

  67. 111
    Gordon 'Smiler' Brown says:

    For some time now I’ve admired how you’ve managed to grow the Chinese economy. You can check with Tony Blair – I was always saying “Wen, Wen, Wen?”.

    Like

  68. 112

    Buffty frae Kirkcaldy, “See Mr. Slanty-Eyes Bigot, told you I would pass the UN CRB with flying colours!”

    Like

  69. 117
    StrongholdBarricades says:

    Tongues?

    Like

  70. 118
    Auto Gestion says:

    ‘So Sarah said “No more bum or bust” so it’s been oral ever since.’

    Like

  71. 119
    Mike Newman says:

    Hoots man! I’m not Kissinger! Get yourself to Specsavers

    Like

    • 129
      QWERTY says:

      Hey Newman, read the rules! Entries must be foul-mouthed filth and personally offensive to the individuals featured in order to qualify.

      Like

  72. 120
    Nullbymouth says:

    People say I cant walk and whistle at the same *ouch, WTF just happened*

    Like

  73. 121
    Seb (oily impics) coe says:

    Gordon welcomes the Korean javelin champion Hu Flung That with a traditional Scottish greeting

    Like

  74. 122
    Gordon Brown says:

    Hello Peking Ducky

    Like

  75. 123
    wen bow wow says:

    i see you’re puckering up for me McMental

    and from the use it’s been getting that could’t possibly be your sphincter muscle.

    Like

  76. 124
    Anonymous says:

    Shut that door!

    Like

  77. 125
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Brown rehearses his Glasgay Kiss.

    Like

  78. 126
    Anonymous says:

    The political equivalent of Ian Brady sent to represent us on the world stage.
    Rule Britania and all that bollocks!

    Like

  79. 127
    michael says:

    Can’t you wait until kick off Gordon.

    Like

  80. 128
    Gordona Browna says:

    I ruv you rong rong time.

    Like

  81. 130
    Fuk Yu Tu, says:

    Goron Blown, Tlenty Million Pound in gold or we send Guido the locking horse negatives.

    Like

  82. 131
    naughty abdul says:

    Mental Jock: No I am not Larry Grayson, I abolished boom and bust .

    Like

  83. 132
    Phil says:

    Inscrutable Asian meets Two faced,superannuated scottish moron with hyper inflated ego and career credentials to match.

    Like

  84. 133
    Sid says:

    No Mr Brown, I am not Aung San Suu Kyi, please stop it you are scaring me!

    Like

  85. 134
    annette curton says:

    Kirkcaldy, Kirkcaldy, Kirckkcaldy, KIIRKCaldy!

    Like

  86. 138
    Mr Ban says:

    Don’t even think about it you smelly old perv…

    Like

  87. 140
    Pox News 24/7 says:

    You eat dog, no but I m an olympian at Nokia chucking.

    Like

  88. 141

    Brown – “Chase me!”

    OR

    Brown – “You remind me of a Bangkok lady-boy of my acquaintance.”

    OR

    Brown – “Let’s flounce around.”

    Like

  89. 142
    keredybretsa says:

    ‘Aye.I’m a Bullsheetter maself, but, I do like to hear a prroofessional at it. So please continue!!’

    Like

  90. 143
    keredybretsa says:

    ‘Give me a wee pecker please.’

    Like

  91. 145
    M says:

    Pukka up banki & close your eyes

    Like

  92. 146
    Anonymous says:

    Wan Lang Kok meets Hung Lo

    Let the pissing contest begin.

    Oh no I wiz sure they said kissin

    Like

  93. 147
    Greychatter says:

    OOOh give us a kiss – will you be my friend like Mandy was??

    Like

  94. 148
    Fitbad the Tailor says:

    “This is what we in Scotland call a Kirkcaldy Kiss”.

    Like

  95. 149
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Perhaps Stalin never left the building. Has he been virtually re-created? After all …. the Murdoch Press said he was Stalin.

    Like

  96. 150
    Ivan Agenda says:

    Brown to Wen.
    This is how I suck up to people. Now when can I join your communist party and get my enormous fee for helping you rule / ruin the world?

    Like

  97. 151
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD and CODFATHER of SOUL says:

    Ban -Ki -Moon Meets Wank-y- Loon

    Like

  98. 152
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD and CODFATHER of SOUL says:

    Gordon Brown “My husband My Wok”

    Like

  99. 153
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD and CODFATHER of SOUL says:

    So Mr Moon I’m looking for a new Korea

    Mr moon Indian food is my Favourite

    Like

  100. 154
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD and CODFATHER of SOUL says:

    So Mitor Blown wat ish your favourite Chinese food ?

    Well actually i’m partial to The Cum of Sum Young Guy

    Like

  101. 155
    David Parker says:

    Mine’s bigger than your’s

    Like

  102. 158
    Goblin Porridge says:

    - Herro. Wen Jiabao.
    – Helloh! I bow when Bob Diamond tells me to.

    Like

  103. 159
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD and CODFATHER of SOUL says:

    ” You sirry irriot !

    Like

  104. 161
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Whatever else we all say about the lack of results of the Caption Comp – that picture of Gordo is a gem. Well done for that – hadn’t seen that pic.

    Like

  105. 163
    Osmo the Magical Gypsy (and Jeff his Magical Caravan). says:

    Aye, keep yer hand right there, wee man ! I’m always up fer a tasty Chinese.

    Like

  106. 165
    The Dirty Rat says:

    Stop your hanky panky or I may need to borrow your Hanky Ban Ki.

    Like

  107. 166
    Owain Glyndwr says:

    Honestly, all I have to do is whistle like this and ed balls comes running

    Like

  108. 167
    Michael Hill says:

    Brown-kiss-moon

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

It’s Time to Speak for England | John Redwood
It Was Me Who Taped Howard Flight | John Woodcock
Indy Editor: We Will Stay Afloat | Press Gazette
English Don’t Want Scotland to Stay at Any Price | Dan Hodges
England Must Have Self-Government Too | Mark Wallace
Next Year’s Election Will Be the Dirtiest Ever | Speccie
Chicken Salmond Runs Away From Sun Cabbie | Sun
Scary No Messages Don’t Add Up | Sun
Feminist War on Children | Laura Perrins
An English Parliament is Inevitable Whatever Happens | Alex Wickham
Union All But Over Even if Scots Vote No | Janan Ganesh


VOTER-RECALL
Find out more about PLMR


Gyles Brandreth writes in his memoirs:

“Sunday, May 10, 1998

Early start: appearing on Breakfast With Frost, to be broadcast from 11 Downing Street. The Chancellor [Gordon Brown] is grouchily amiable, but so earnest — and still biting his fingernails to the quick.

After the show, he took us upstairs to his flat. He lives above No 10, while Blair and family are in the No 11 duplex, which is bigger and more like a proper house.

I was intrigued that, when he took us into his bedroom, the Chancellor rather ostentatiously opened the built-in wardrobes, as if he wanted us to see the women’s frocks that were hanging in there.

They looked quite large, but I don’t think they belong to Gordon. I assume they belong to his girlfriend [Sarah Macaulay, who he later married].

I presume he was keen for us to know that he has one — and that she’s not a ‘beard’. I don’t think he does anything without calculation.”



The British media are Hunts says:

Now the SNP know how UKIP voters feel all the time.


Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:






RSS




AddThis Feed Button
Archive


Labels
Guido Reads
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,454 other followers