July 17th, 2012

The Two Faces of Polly Toynbee

A fantastic spot by the acceptable face of the left over at Though Cowards Flinch. Polly Toynbee might be off on her summer holidays soon, but that hasn’t stopped her from penning one last Olympic-sized rant for the Guardian. The subject of her ire this time is G4S outsourcing:

No one can prove the value or cost of most outsourcing. What Thatcher began and Labour continued is an epidemic of evidence-free, faith-based policymaking. Politicians have been seized by a conviction that private is always better. With no public service for fair comparison, the weary old mantras of “monolithic”, “sluggish” public services go unchallenged.”

Pretty strong stuff. The only problem is that three years ago poor old Polly said almost exactly the opposite:

“There is no doubt that putting some services out to tender has vastly improved certain standards over the years, broken the power of vested interests and brought in competition that has sharpened up results.”

Even worse, she was writing for the in-house magazine of outsourcers Serco. Fighting a noble crusade against outsourcing from her Italian poolside paid for by outsourcer’s cash. Surely the end of credibility is in sight for Polly?

UPDATE: Further reading leaves Guido flabbergasted to welcome Polly to his side of the barricades on the privatisation of the NHS:

“Just look at how hospital consultants’ waiting lists plummeted when a few Independent Treatment Centres were set up nearby. Suddenly, long waiting lists for hip and cataract operations fell because patients had a choice … a little gingering up round the edges has an electrifying effect on sleepy outfits. Often, private provision makes sense where small units need to buy in some expertise or back-office work they can’t develop themselves. Some things have always been private – GPs, for example, the most-loved part of the National Health Service.”


  1. 1
    Potty Toynbee says:

    It’s all Fatchur’s fault !!!!


    • 3
      Potty Toynbee says:

      Fatchur was great


      • 9
        Dave says:

        You almost sound like a principles-less PR c’unt. Welcome aboard!


        • 27
          Grrr says:

          What goes on in any BBC newsroom, any University, any Lefty institution.

          The purpose of the Left is to increase its own power, money, influence and terror by destroying pride, self-reliance or self-determination of the citizens its seeks to dominate.

          There is no greater threat on this earth to the Left – than a proud, independant, free thinking, self-reliant man who wishes to live his life without interferance and does not seek help.

          There is greater threat to the future of the Left than children reaised to think, act and work for themseleves without the need of the state.


          • What's Left? says:

            Mr Guido, surely you’re not accusing the highly moral, superior, plutocratic, elitist Left as being hypocritical? Two faced even?

            Shame on you.


          • Anonymous says:

            I assume that you’re totally cool with anarcho-communists then.


          • Orthodox Socialist says:

            You sound like a greedy and selfish Fatcherite. It is people like you that have melted the icecaps and murdered millions of wrong thinking Kulaks (or was that us?) How dare you suggest that you know how to spend your money better than I do.


          • Jasmin Alibi Offwhite says:

            Fucking Global Warming. It’s so hot I could murder a choc ice!


          • Jimmy says:

            A progessive society must be fluid enough to change position.


          • AC1 says:

            “Progressives” tend to change society by murdering those who disagree with them.


          • erm... says:

            the ground we stand on.

            ~firstly we were all heart
            and we ruled the world.
            then  we were all mind.
            and became a poodle to the Big ‘un.
            now that no one will get everything they want
            we reveal our spiritual self.
            It is a do or die moment.


          • Grrr says:

            True ACI

            THe quote that comes to mind is

            “The only way the Left has been able to achieve ‘equality’ is with a Secret Service and Concentration camp – otherwise harder working people are generally richer’.


      • 193
        Sylvio. (supplier of fine wines to the Toynbee establishment in Tuscania) says:

        “No one can prove the value or cost of most outsourcing. What Thatcher began and Labour continued is an epidemic of evidence-free, faith-based policymaking. Politicians have been seized by a conviction that private is always better. With no public service for fair comparison, the weary old mantras of “monolithic”, “sluggish” public services go unchallenged.”

        Actually, I agree with Polly on this. Nice of her to be so impartially condemning of both Labour and Tories re the outsourcing mania. It always made me suspicious. A little of it yes but not on this scale. She also got it right about GP’s- been outsourced since 1948!

        Polly not all bad. Just monumentally hypocritical, thats all.


    • 49
      Giuseppi. Polly's pool boy. says:

      Live by the sword. Die by the sword.


      • 56
        Fish says:

        Which of the Guardian’s redundancy councelling sessions is she attending today?


        • 93
          Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

          Does Polly have a grand daughter? Boaz.


          • R Brand says:

            I like granddaughters. Also I like using big words from the dictionary and accusing people of racism. Err I mean of having the disposition to being regarded as, in this modern liberated cosmopolitan world, undemocratically accepting the myth based tenets of racism. So there.


    • 198
      Day says:

      I ‘worked’ for a Local Authority for 30 years of my working life 27 of which was for a small LA (HPBC) and 3 for a large LA (DCC); DCC was the typical LA where the 80/20 rule was alive and well; 80% of the time was spent talking about holidays and pastimes whilst 20% was spent working so therefore 80% of the 20% (ie 16%) was effort whilst only 4% of actual outputs were achieved. I hated it and would much rather have stayed at the smaller Authority but had no choice as being subject to a TUPE transfer. NEVER AGAIN!!!!


  2. 2
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    I make no bones about it,I prefer Polly’s backside.


    • 89
      erm... says:

      someone’s frontside….someone else’s backside.
      what is life without loyalty.
      first witness…the BLairs.
      Second witness…Jamie oliver.


  3. 4
    Polly = prune-faced harridan says:

    I remember the bad old days when if you wanted a phone you had to wait for months and initially you were given a party line (remember them?). Now you can buy a mobile for tuppence and landline phones are on sale everywhere.


    • 15
      Loungelizard says:

      Russia under the Soviets. No unemployment, everybody had a job. Hotel reception areas full of porters who wouldn’t do a thing, they couldn’t be fired. This is the sort of thing Polly so admires.


    • 118
      Polly Toynbeeee says:

      Typical right-wing smear tactic.

      (Just ignore all the evidence)


  4. 5
    Polly from her Tuscan Estate says:

    I cannot be two faced, I would not be wearing this one if I was

    Sent from my iPad
    (The black one not the white one)


    • 33
      Mike Hunt says:

      So not a racist then, glad to hear it.


    • 34

      That is SOOO yeasterday, Dahling! I outsource my Cougar loveliness now – via Alphonse!
      I used to think that employing young foreign “workers” to do a job no right thinking Englishman would do, at any price, was morally and philosophically indefensible…. then Alphonse came.

      Sent from my TenaPad: PTFF@Gruniad.lichtenstein.com


      • 76
        Sir Aston Martin says:

        I adore you, Polly, you are the queen of my soul! Such pulchritude! Such intellectual rigour, consistency and probity! Not to mention your bank-balance, which is as bulging as your flesh!

        Now that you have ditched Gordon as your ideal, is there a chance for little old me?


  5. 6
    AC1 says:

    Diana Moon Glampers is the alter-ego of Polly.


  6. 7
    Whippersnapper2 says:

    Hopefully, this f****** annoying woman will be out of a job …permanently and she can join her beloved welfare state from the dole queue angle. I wonder how much she has ripped off her employers for- over the centuries? Have no fear you sh*thead the BBC have bottomless pockets for you.
    I know some pretty ghastly people but she takes the biscuit. Ugh…..pass the sick bag.


    • 26
      Richard Gott - KGB grass, and Guardian journalist says:

      She going to be the Guardian page 3 babe to try and boost those sagging sales.

      It’s going to be stuffed with even more t1ts and arses!


  7. 8
    Disgruntled Sheffielder says:

    Polly Toynbee is a complete waste of space and champagne socialist of the worst order. She should be shot.


    • 79
      Elvis says:

      +1billion. She isan absolute waste of oxygen. Hypocritical, pompous, two-faced whited sepulchre. Burning at the stake is a nice option with a few faggots from the Labour party to help the fire get going.


    • 197
      MILF fancier says:

      You’ve forgotten about that man hating b***h Harridan Harperson or Yvette ” I cut off my husband’s balls ” Cooper. If Polly Toynbee should be shot ( and I personally would only be too happy to pull the trigger) then Harperson should be burned alive using napalm because it hurts more than anything else.


  8. 10
    Barry says:

    What a dreadful last sentence. It would read better as “Guido wonders what it must be like inside Toynbee’s head, as she lies beside a Tuscan swimming pool, fighting a noble crusade against the rich”.


    • 81
      Sir Aston Martin says:

      No it wouldn’t, Barry.

      Why not get your own blog and leave us windowlickers to worship at the feet of Gweeds, the Nabokov of the blogosphere?


    • 178
      Anonymous says:

      Oh dear Barry,we know she “lies” but don’t you mean “as she lays beside a Tuscan swimming pool”?


  9. 11
    Alan Rusbodger says:

    She doesn’t have a Tuscan villa.

    It’s in Umbria.


  10. 12
    Stepney says:

    You’re missing the point Guido old bean. Every week the poor old gal is faced with acres of white space and has to fill it somehow. Given she has a hundred and one other things to do (ring the villa pool boy, organise the Waitrose shop, harangue the Estonian cleaners), all she can do is simply hurl some random words down and hope to God she hasn’t contradicted herself.

    She’s bloody good at high speed verbiage. The fact that it’s normally a pile of steaming, hypocritical, contraPolly is neither here nor there.

    cf Big Johnno, apposite or what? “Sir, a woman’s preaching is like a dog’s walking on his hind legs. It is not done well; but you are surprised to find it done at all.”


    • 24
      will says:

      i hope the italians do what the french did and impose a giant tax of foreign villa owners. See polly whinge then. At least she can afford a holiday many people cant in this country.


    • 184
      Fish says:

      So why doesn’t she hire a chimp to do her writing? Stick it at the laptop and at random it should produce something resembling a Guardian column


  11. 13
    SP4BS says:

    Hey everyone, I’m an entirely new poster who is brilliant.


  12. 14
    Polly from her Tuscan Estate says:



  13. 16
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    The two sides of Polly prior to jetting off to Tuscany = polygon.


  14. 17
    hew dunnit says:

    Two faces, two opinions! What did you expect?
    Let’s hear it for Polly – hip, hip…., hypocrite!


    • 68
      Bliar (UKIPs Greatest Assett) says:

      someone call my name ??

      I’m really a Perma Tanned Multi Faced Hypocrite of the Presidential order

      but guess who’s got the most MONEY in there numerous bank accounts ??

      TAX Free……….

      Now get back to work you filthy peasants……………


  15. 18
    50 shades of Polly says:



  16. 19
    Raving Loon says:

    Classic left wing cognative dissonance.


  17. 20
    Anonymous says:


    Please mark a X against any of the following statements that are racist.

    a) Britain is institutionally racist.
    b) Polly Toynbee is a white Hunt
    c) Polly Toynbee is a blonde Hunt
    d) Polly Toynbee is a fat Hunt


  18. 23
    phenian says:

    I think you have misunderstood your quantifiers ‘most’ and ‘some’


  19. 25
    Kevin T says:

    Privatisation certainly has its place, and Thatcher did it well by choosing services that could survive as businesses, but like anything it needs to be managed properly. Too often, thanks largely to the incompetence of politicians and civil servants, we’ve seen crap, monolithic public services replaced by crap, monolithic “private” companies (Capita, G4S, Southeastern Fucking Railways) that are little more than extensions of the public sector and have all of its problems plus an added profit motive. I put private in quotes because I don’t consider a company that gets all its revenue from the state to be private anymore than a benefits scrounger is self-sufficient.


    • 41
      SP4BS says:

      “Southeastern Fucking Railways”

      which PR firms suggested that name?


    • 46
      The General Public says:

      Quite right. Most of the problems associated with privatisations in recent times are that the public sector bureaucrats negotiating contracts on behalf of the taxpayer could not outwit a guinea-pig.

      Does anyone seriously think that the numpty in charge of procuring this service had as their question 1 to G4S “How EXACTLY will you attract 10,000 suitably-trained individuals to work on a short-term, one-off employment contract in 4 years’ time?”


      • 119
        AC1 says:

        I think 8 THOUSAND quid a WEEK should do…

        Look at the maths.

        250 Million
        10 Thousand people
        3 weeks work.

        The government cant negotiate for toffee. Bet on massive “civil servant” kickbacks.


    • 161
      davidc says:

      does anyone know who was responsible for writing the specification for the contract for olympic site security , which companies tendered , and who took the final decision to award it to g4s ?

      is the contract between g4s and locoq and if so why is the home office getting involved other than to try and save the situation ?


  20. 27
    Nan Taylor says:

    Poor old thing. She must have forgotten all those PFIs that the Labour idiots fanfared so well.

    I reckon she’s got that Alzheimer’s.


  21. 29
    Alan Ruffbadger says:

    Dear Polly,

    I’m writing to inform you that due to cuts reduced investment at The Guardian, we must terminate your employment with us.

    Over the years you have written an awful lot of leftie drivel, thus, keeping the many militant teachers and public sector non jobbers, who read our paper happy and well brainwashed.

    We invite you to the downstairs meeting room at 13:30 for an informal chat to discuss your next career move. Please be assured that your services will be sought after by many looney left organisations like the BBC and HuffPo.

    We will be delighted to provide an impeccable reference, which I shall write myself, it will be full of crap and extend to several volumes, such is the verbose claptrap I am renown for writing.

    Good luck Polly in whatever opportunity you pursue, we know your hypocrisy and double standards will open many doors in the left wing MSM.

    Yours sincerely

    Mr Ruffbadger


  22. 30
    Lard Pressclott says:

    Wikipedia says she failed the eleven-plus. How mindnumbingly stupid do you have to be to do that?


    • 35
      Ed Balls says:

      Congratulations on failing Polly. Labour don’t like winners.

      Remember the first step to failure is trying


    • 115
      AC1 says:

      “Somehow” she still managed to go to Oxford….

      Nothing to do with a rich family with connections.


      • 116
        AC1 says:

        Thus depriving someone else of a place.


        • 174
          Northern Monkey says:

          She had got a single A level in history though. And a double gold star for milk-monitoring (semi-skimmed, obviously).


      • 199
        Harold Hill says:

        Having the name ‘Toynbee’ at Oxford is a bit like having the name ‘Dimblebee’ at the BBC. She got into Oxford on the basis of one A Level (and, of course, a very, very famous grandfather and Oxford man, Arnold Toynbee.)

        Just think a bright working class student (or anyone else, for that matter) who gained the requisite grades through hard work could have had Polly’s place instead.


  23. 31
    annette curton says:

    I have seen scribbles from Polly in which she has managed to contradict herself in the space of two paragraphs, so no surprise there… a moonbat.


  24. 32
    The General Public says:

    La Toynbee was featured in Private Eye’s ‘Hackwatch’ in 2009, charted her articles on Gordon Brown over a period of years which showed similar lack of consistency.
    Her position on most subjects appears to change with the wind.


    • 43
      The Libor party says:

      She sounds shambolic.


    • 44
      will says:

      Polly is brilliant, her articles are such a joy to read. I tend to laugh myself with a rich columnist trying to empathise with the poor. I bet she goes down well at clapham or islington dinner parties. If she want to be at one with the poor i suggest she moves to the surrey lane estate in battersea or stockwell park estate in stockwell to see how real people live and experience it.

      I bet when clapham junction was torched last year I bet she was wetting her knickers over it, as it was less than a mile from her. Polly is the 1% she does not reprent the 99%


  25. 38

    Corporate inflences aside, people do evolve their opinions as their experience grows. Otherwise we would never learn. We would still be hammering holes in our head to cure headaches. I would rather have leaders who were willing to change their views as their knowledge/wisdom/experence grows, rather than have peole who allways thoughts one way and will never evolve regardless.

    The next best thing will be when a minister can say “sorry folks I got it wrong” insted of blaming labour/europe/unemployed/disabled/anyone other than themselves.


    • 48
      Blob Crowe says:


      I agree I used to think that £100k pa was enough for anyone, but I was big enough to say I was wrong. Now I earn £150k and that is currently enough for anyone.


      • 52
        Joss Taskin says:

        Are you still living in your council house, Blob, or will you move out to accommodate the tsunami of immigration encouraged by the Libor party ?


        • 57
          Blob Crowe says:

          I’m still right about anyone being able to live in a council house.

          Does that answer your question?


    • 102
      The Paragnostic says:

      An alternative view on Polly would be that like all leftists, she is able to hold mutually exclusive opinions on anything under the sun due to the inherently contradictory nature of predatory socialism.

      Thus her views do not evolve as a result of experience, but are automatically generated according to her intended audience.

      In short, I think you are being a little kind to the lazy fat ignorant bitch.


    • 111
      AC1 says:

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trepanning is still in use today.

      It might help to research your examples in future.


  26. 40
    Legal Crook says:

    The end in sight for a two faced labour loving hypocrite, NEVER.


    • 50
      will says:

      All polly families assets I bet are in a trust fund well away from the tax man. They are the type of individuals who think everyone else should pay taxes but have clever accountants to put money from the reach of the taxman

      This is why i despise such people, because they can pay more tax but reckon everyone else should instead.


  27. 45
    David Cameron (Leader of the Nasty Party) says:

    Polly Toynbee is no Choc Ice, and that’s a fact !


  28. 54
    Best Wishes says:

    May a plague of Romanian Gypsies take over her London town house while she is out of the country.


  29. 58
    Pox News 24/7 says:

    My God, that God awful face, if it were not for her extreme good fortune at becoming the most champagney of champagne socialist, that face would be destined for a Jeremy Kyle show.


  30. 61
    BBC says:

    We will be TUPE’ing darling Polly over to us soon.


  31. 62
    CT says:

    Guido said “Surely the end of credibility is in sight for Polly?”

    No, it’s not.

    We got to, and passed, the end of her credibility so long ago that it’s far out of sight – behind us.


  32. 64
    Ferdy Nand says:

    Iceland do a great own brand Dark Choc Ice.


  33. 66
    Aunty Matter says:

    It isn’t privatisation that is the issue. Does Toynbee think aeroplanes would be safer if they were maintained only by state employed engineers?

    The issue is when Government contracts out, it needs to put in place proper contracts and monitoring of contractor performance.

    Speak to ANY decent private sector company who use contractors themselves and they will tell you that monitoring and auditing your contractors is vital.

    The RNLI do a brilliant job yet they are not state run or does Toynbee think some bloated state sector lifeboat organisation could do a better job?


    • 104
      AC1 says:

      The RNLI are a top charity lets keep it quiet so the left don’t get involved in something they can ruin. Where’s the wheelchair access for RNLI crew etc? Why aren’t there more black bereaved lesbian RNLI crew?


  34. 67
    McBroon says:

    Many of the comments posted here have gone too far, too fast!


  35. 69
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Listen up Toynbee.
    GS4 were awarded the contract 5 years ago – under labour.
    John Reid, labour’s ex Home Secretary, was appointed a director of GS4 on 18th December 2008.
    All under labour’s watch. Yet again more shit left by labour.
    So Toynbee go and interview Reid, and take that sour faced bitch Cooper with you. Then write another article about how innocent Reid’s appointment was.


  36. 70
    Mad Frankie Maude says:

    Is that tart,Polly Toynbee,a pilgrim ?


  37. 71
    Aunty Matter says:

    Polly will defend her £150K a year to the end, there are plenty of minimum wage staff at the Guardian who will be sacrificed before her royal fatness is given the boot.


    • 128
      will says:

      Thats what upsets me that the guardian has been taken control by a left win cabal. The rot started when it moved to london, if it was still in manchester most of the left wingers would have left it alone.


  38. 72
    Silvio Berlusconi MP says:

    She reminds me of my cleaner. I’d love to squirt some of my bunga bunga juice over her face.


  39. 75
    choc ice says:

    choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice choc ice


  40. 82
    Hang The Bastards says:

    Polly is a stupid old bandwagon whoring cow.

    Its not rocket science to figure out who should be made redundant first.


    • 91
      The Tuscany Pimp says:

      Just heard that Polly is flying by her own fragrantly perfumed private jet from Farnborough to Italy this will save her from mixing with the great smelly unwashed mostly fat masses………….


      • 103
        AC1 says:

        Also create more of that CO2 her political husband is against.

        CO2 reduction is only for the little people.


        • 117
          Beeb spokesperson says:

          No No No ….you have it all wrong……yet again

          Its only those very Nasty Tories & their daft supporters who cause very

          large amounts of CO2 to erupt from every one of there Tory orifice’s,

          that must be very heavily Taxed & Taxed & Taxed……these Nasty Tories

          are the sole cause of Global Warming & we are doing everything possible

          to erradicate them….by all means possible…..

          Kindly Note any of Polly’s discharges are purely minimal & by accident……


        • 175

          Dahling! I’m not taking that old fart with me! No – Alphonse has been washed and sent to my room for when I land.

          I’ll be all over him within seconds of getting there. Just imagine all that pent up sexual vigour still in this fat, flabby, stretch marked, sagging, slightly whiffy 66 year old socialist cougar’s body – it’ll be just like 9 1/2 Weeks, but with more Ralgex, KY jelly and disappointment, Alphonse says, the little tease. Go on – imagine it, you know you want to

          CARLOTTA! Where’s my fucking bottle of cold Champagne, you bitch! I pay you £20 EVERY year and I still have to put up with this terrible service!

          Sent from my TenaPad: PTFF@Gruniad.lichtenstein.com


  41. 99
    A hard PressedTax Payer says:

    Just listening to that sanctimonious fcuking c*nt Chairman Keith the Oily slime MP having a rant at the G4S CEO…..

    Pity they didn’t give this Oily slime MP the same type of grilling over all of the skeletons he has buried……….

    He really is a pompous fcuking tosser…… of the first order…….


    • 107
      There's none so blind as those who will not see says:

      Are you always so tribal?

      Buckles of G4S inspires as much confidence as a wet blanket. All hail the private sector. What an utter c’unt.


      • 114
        Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

        It’s another omni-shambles.


      • 127
        Fishy Mann says:

        Don’t be a test all your life. A good starting point for you is to open your eyes and see Vaz for the crooked twat that he is.


        • 140
          There's none so blind as those who will not see says:

          Yes, they are all crooked! Politics and business is corrupt to the core.

          The whole stinking facade of implied honesty in public or business life needs to be torn down.


      • 130
        A hard PressedTax Payer says:

        Was just trying to point out, but not very successfully, the utter fcuking

        hypocrisy of the lot of them…….

        most of the HoC parasites & pimps still need to be locked up, especially

        ZanuLieLabor deviants

        G4S Buckles should be fired for Gross Incompetence & without any


        Lord John Reid ex Home Secretary is retained by G4S along with Lord Paul

        Condon who is on the Main Board both seem to be suffering from acute throat

        infections & unable to utter any words at all…….

        Useless over paid fcuking toss*ers the lot of them……


  42. 109

    BBC Rogue Traders presenter Dan Penteado was today jailed for 12 weeks for council tax and housing benefit fraud worth more than £24,000.

    Pro rata, a year inside would have netted him £104k. And that, of course, is tax free.

    You could make a business out of it… Oh! People do.


  43. 124
    HenryV says:

    I grew up in a mining village. The union leader or Labour councillor being first to buy their council house, sending their kids to the local private grammar school, or being seen popping into the local private hospital is nothing new to me. Why is it a shock for you?


  44. 125
    realist!!!! says:

    Hey “G” you forgot the loony left logo. This post must justify it’s use!
    Just to the LEFT of her ugly mug!


  45. 126
    cu*ts bo*th wa*ys says:

    Neo/Buido. Whatever you’ve changed in your software has made the Comments illegible on my Nokia phone. It’s like reading the tiniest type at an eye test. In the days of metal type, it looks like a three-point font, or even less! Please unbreak your site. Leo


    • 133
      concrete pump says:

      Serves you right for buying a Nokia.


    • 138
      AC1 says:

      Check if your phone has suffered damage from being thrown.


      • 157

        Made in GB

        Wrecked by GB

        Paid for by you.


        • 162
          Gordon Fcuking.McMental says:

          Just wait till I fully get into my smashing UN Global Education Job……

          Then I will really show how many Top of the Range Nokia Mobiles (Supplied by UK Tax Payers & the UN) I can smash up each & every day…….

          A unique special talent I fully intend to pass on to all the children of the

          Universe & Beyond in my own special way……


  46. 129
    Forged By Society says:

    I haven’t been on holiday in five years.

    What does this sour faced slapper know about being poor?


  47. 131
    Ploppy Toybee says:

    Have a great summer! I hope the strikes by my union comrades won’t fuck it up too much for you! You’ll have my sympathy while I sunbathe at the poolside in my Tuscan villa and sip pink champagne on the balcony.


    • 137
      concrete pump says:

      ‘Sip pink champagne’.

      Is that a euphemism…?


    • 144
      Loungelizard says:

      Tuscan Extremest Group Destroy Villa…..As part of their continuing fight against rich foreigners….. Distraught Mrs P Tonybags said ‘Kill the filthy…..’


  48. 134
    Rogue Presenter says:

    A television presenter whose job was to prevent people being ripped off has been sentenced to 12 weeks in prison for benefit fraud. Dan Penteado, who worked on the BBC’s Rogue Trader and Watchdog programmes, admitted eight offences of dishonestly or knowingly claiming council tax and housing benefits worth more than £24,000. Bournemouth magistrates heard how he had neglected to mention earning more than £56,000 for his television work over three years.


  49. 141
    The Sleeper says:

    This G4S guy Buckles is a completely useless t.wat.

    However,the MP’s on the Committee are even worse.

    E.g. Bridget Phillipson (Lab) has the fuckin’ gall to lecture him on how to run his business…and her entire ‘business’ experience??

    Worked for a womens refuge charity. That’s fine,but hardly gives her the qualification to claim business management guru status.


    • 146
      Nullbymouth says:

      He looks like a computer generated mockup of what Harry Potter will look like at 45


    • 165
      Chairman of the Committee Oily Slime Vaz says:

      Thank you for your Vote of Confidence

      it takes a lot of Practice to keep up the standards you have highlighted

      by my committee

      We try so very hard all of the time to keep lowering the standards even further

      below the bottom of the barrel.

      Thats why we need all of holidays we extract each year to recharge our depleted

      batteries all over the world @ 5 star locations with our

      extended families plus 1st class travel and all gratefully funded Tax Payers.

      Rather like the BBC TV Licence so willing extracted from people or else…..

      Democracy at its best which we propergate everyway we can, when ever we can


    • 189
      William IV says:

      Check out Wearside Women in Need who she worked for – their accounts to the Charities Commission have been submitted late for several years. Some management!
      By the way her mother was top dog in WWIN.


  50. 143
    Nullbymouth says:

    How can Keith Vag be so hypocritical …… “Mr Buckles please answer the question asked”. He is right of course, but why does it NEVER apply to the Political Elite?


  51. 148
    Jago Frost says:

    Pollytwaddle misses the root cause of the whole olympic security problems. That was the few self obsessed graspers wanting to boost their images and host this commercial lycra-fest in London.
    In an ideal world the olympics would have been in Paris, leaving the froggies with the security nightmare.


    • 149
      Forged By Society says:

      I tell you all the olympics will be good for, boatloads of immigrants and greeks coming over and claiming asylum or ‘vanishing’ never to return home again.


      • 156
        A No.10 Prize Plonker says:

        Thats a state secret that only One asylum plans to leave again after the Olympics ….we will be call for a Judge lead enquiry on how you got hold of this restricted piece of information.

        There are also no plans to deport the 1.2 Million estimated Olympics asylum seekers either because of ECHR …….


  52. 152
    The Sleeper says:

    B’Jesus…..Buckles is buckling in t’Committee.

    Looks like he’s making up G4S policy on the hoof..committing to pay military housing costs and a bonus to the troops.God knows what else he’s going to commit to.

    You can bet your life his Board know nothing about these,and he’ll be out on the street by tomorrow.


    • 159
      Anon says:

      Don’t worry the Board wont find out until next year, at the earliest, what he was coerced into saying by the sanctimonious Oily fcuking Vaz & the rest of the pillocks on the annal rejects committee they pollute.


  53. 153
    UKIP.i.am says:

    Does Polly and other left wing fruit-loops think the state should hire about 10,000 full-time staff for temporary work like the Olympic games?

    What alternative is there but to outsource? Unless of course there are well over 10,000 people working for the state, paid for by muggins taxpayers, who aren’t doing any work at all? On second thoughts perhaps that is indeed the case.


    • 166
      Intelligent Polly's Official ZanuLieLabor Spokesperson says:

      I’m all in favour of bringing in the 100,000 extra needed Olympics security people & all from overseas, its right that we should bring them here, give them & their families everything they need, houses, fully equipped with all of the latest electronic gizmos plus schools, hospitals & plenty of Tax Payers Money…..after all UK Tax Payers enjoy having all of there ill gotten gains taken from them by the state

      We should be proud of the way we are filling up to bursting point this small island although we may have to tell a few million UK Caucasian’s over 60 years old to bugger off somewhere else to we can take their homes from them…..

      It all makes complete sense & is part of the Master Plan etched in stone & given from on high by His Holiness St.Tony who we should all bow down to…… in acclamation to for ever more…….


  54. 160
    LoopyLeftie says:

    Polly is a national treasure and should be maintained at public expense.


    • 171
      Never done any work for the last 15 years & proud of it says says:

      Do you mean fully preserved & embalmed then put in a purpose built mausoleum
      erected in Hyde Park….????

      Sounds like a great idea & I will subscribe as soon as I get my next benefits payment
      although not much left these days with the price of fags, they are a rip off but I need at least 3 packs a day before I can get out on my top of the range mobility scooter paid for by tax payers, they are such nice mugs…….


    • 183
      Elvis says:

      You mean buried as soon as possible to be dug up at a later date?


  55. 163
    Engelbert Humperdick says:

    I’d still fuck it


  56. 181
    keredybretsa says:

    Perhaps she’s in line for a spot of Guardian sourcing out.


  57. 186
    I really, really can't be arsed to..... says:

    In a spirit of helpfulness, here transformation@guardian.co.uk is the email address
    of the nice people at The Guardian who are selecting the staff members to be fired.
    I wonder why it vanished earlier?


  58. 187
    robbie says:

    The trouble is, the public services are full of Toynbeesque, turncoat twats and it gets worse the higher level of management you go.


  59. 190
    noob says:

    Wow – first time here – it’s like all the pub nutters have found each other at last :) amazing.


  60. 192
    Anonymous says:

    Please folow me at @TollyPointBee 4 live updates from the Tuscan Villa


  61. 194
    fitzfitz says:

    WE can’t quite place this Toynbee bird — is she the one who followed Uncle Joe – or the other one … ??


  62. 195
    Boul says:

    Leftie takes approach of do as I say, not as a do shock.


  63. 196
    Anonymous says:


    http://www.italy-weather-and-maps.com/weather/TOS/ Looks like its gonna be hot but not searing at the Tuscan Poolside Today Ciao


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