June 30th, 2012

Al Jazeera’s Charlotte Jackson in Thatcherite Girl-on-Girl Action

In what will no doubt come as disappointing news to Mehdi Hasan, Guido will admit that Charlotte Jackson is by far his favourite Al Jazeera and Sky Sports presenter. She tweeted this picture of her celebrating in Maggie’s on the Fulham Road last night with the comment: “It’s safe to say I’ve pulled!”

Via: OnTablets


  1. 1
    Thatchers fault says:


  2. 2
    a non says:

    Porcelein / China Maggie T chopstick holder?

  3. 3
    BOB CROW says:


  4. 4
    She's fit says:

    There’s something of mine I’d like Charlotte to pull.

  5. 5
    QVC presenter with beads of sweat running down his face says:

    Damn, I’ve sold some tasteless crap in my time, but this is going to be a toughy.

  6. 6
    David Cameron says:

    I’ve never seen Maggie’s thatch.

  7. 7
    a blonde moment says:

    One is half empty, the other is half full.

  8. 8
    Oh!!!! says:

  9. 9

    Can you imagine the disciplinary tribunal if that was a BBC hack

  10. 10
    Herman van Rompuy says:

    Never mind, Dave, just stay on your knees and keep sucking my gristly EU todger. Forget the Conservatives, I am your one true love.

  11. 11

    This is a blasphemy against the blessed Margaret, Guido, and is likely to get you excommunicated latae sententiae.

  12. 12
  13. 13
    I'd watch al-Jizzera if she dressed like this says:

  14. 14
    Good spot says:

    Good spot

    all credit to your Guy News sports reporter ;)

  15. 15
    AC1 says:

    That’s Blessed Margaret (PBUH).

    Say 3 Hail Thatchers as penitence.

  16. 16
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    Another screeching U-turn or another Cast Iron Guarantee?

    I can hardly wait.

  17. 17

    All of us would watch if she dressed up down like this:


  18. 18
    nellnewman says:

    His plummeting poll ratings have just come in. Mind militwit’s are plummetig as well after he gave that cringeworthy speech on bankers and the crisis that labour ‘had nothing to do with’.

  19. 19

    PBUH is just a bit too moozie for me to print.

    You had better say them with me…

  20. 20
    AC1 says:

    Go on. It really annoys them (it’s why I do it).

  21. 21
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    Well that didn’t take very long, did it? World’s Newest Democracy to World’s Newest Pariah State in about 24 hours.

    I guess Libya and eventually Syria (and longer-term, Turkey) will all go the same way.

  22. 22
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    Well that didn’t take very long, did it? World’s Newest Democracy to World’s Newest Pariah State in about 24 hours.

    I guess Liby*a and eventually Sy*ria (and longer-term, Tur*key) will all go the same way.

  23. 23
    Anonymous says:

    Cameron is finished, the Tories have about 2 weeks.

  24. 24
    Owain Glyndwr says:

    can’t help thinking that this pic tells you all you need to know about the millitwat

  25. 25
    Scrounging Media Hoon says:

    It is safe to say I don’t give a shit.

  26. 26
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    PBUH = Pork, Bacon, Unsmoked-Ham, for, like all goodly people, she findeth them delicious, especially with fine wine and whisky.

  27. 27

    Sаnctі Аpоstоlі Pеtrυs еt Pаυlυs: dе qυоrυm pоtеstаtе еt аυctоrіtаtе cоnfіdіmυs іpsі іntеrcеdаnt prо nоbіs аd Dоmіnυm.

  28. 28
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    “Miliband checks his ClearBlue Pregnancy Test kit, 2 weeks after being held-down and fucked by the unions.”

  29. 29
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Sorry Cameron is a twat of the highest order.

    Hitchens’ description of him as “Mr Slippery” is about right although f*ck knows where that puts Blair.

  30. 30
    Anon says:

    AC1, the Joe 90 of order_order.com

  31. 31
    paulw says:

    It is now 4 years since the financial meltdown.

    Not a single top banker has been prosecuted for fraud.

    And going forward – not a single top banker will be prosecuted for fraud.

    Politicians and bankers are 2 sides of the same coin. If the bankers go down – they will take the political class with them.

    The entire parliamentary edifice is corrupt. The entire banking system is corrupt.

    Who will throw ALL of them in jail ?

  32. 32
    Al-Mahood Elshaba says:

    Why is this young lady not covered when working for Al Jazeera? She must be lashed and stoned for such lewd behaviour (but not before I’ve taken one last look.)


  33. 33
    Blowing Whistles says:

    As for Blair – how about ‘Mr Sssssliterring forked-tongue’. note the err in there as well.

  34. 34
    Aunty Matter says:

  35. 35
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Proof reading spelling typo – sorry for the mistake:- Mr Ssssslitherring forked-tongue.

  36. 36
    Gordon says:

    Come on Andy!!! We’ve fixed it so you get the spazzes in the early rounds.

  37. 37
    Aunty Matter says:

    Militwat really does put the M in mong.

  38. 38
    Diane Fatbutt says:

    Blair is as slimy as whale diarrhoea.

    Whereas Brown was like dog shit coated in beaten egg and rolled in pig iron filings.

  39. 39
    Ewa says:

    Fuckin bitch copied my look , didn’t she Guido ??

  40. 40
    Legal Crook says:

    But Gromit does not have a mouth, but if he did it would just look like……………..

  41. 41
    concrete pump says:

    Woof…! (spoff).

  42. 42
    Freddie Stobart says:

    Cue the beer-belly, balding, sweaty armpitted, lorry-driving jibes.

  43. 43
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Queen Victoria didn’t even believe girl-on-girl action existed, if we are to believe the approved version of history on why male homosexuality was outlawed during her reign, but female was not; apparently she had said to the PM she would be the first monarch in a century and a half not to give Royal Assent if the provisions aganst women were included. Something tells me there was more to it than that– and perhaps her ladies-of-the-bedchamber knew something they weren’t telling. Or they were in on it. Of course the Old Bat had nine kids with Dick Pierce, but she COULD have been batting for both teams. One wonders, what DID amuse her?

  44. 44
    The Two-faced Tosser in No 10 says:

    I say you jolly chaps!!!! I’ll wager you haven’t noticed my frightfully super wheeze where I say one thing and do just the jolly opposite!! …. Ha! Ha! Aha!! Aha!! …. And no-one notices!! Watt? What?? Wattage!! Wind-farmage!! EUSSR-age!!!!

  45. 45
    nellnewman says:

    Doubt it. Might have been true if labour had a credible opposition to put up against him.

    But with militwit and balls who were heavily involved in gordon’s mammoth mismanagement of our monies and banks, nobody in their right mind would vote for them to take over!!!

  46. 46
    Freddie Stobart says:

    You think they’d be glad of the traffic.

  47. 47
    AC1 says:

    Only if Labour ditch MilliPolicy.

  48. 48
    concrete balls says:

    fap fap fap fap fap fap fap fap

  49. 49
    AC1 says:

    Maybe we should quarantine it off, before we get a load of people escaping the egyptian utopia trying to start jizya funded colonies here.

  50. 50
    The Man who put the ‘It’ in ‘the Conservative Party? – Fuck it!’ says:


  51. 51
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Great spot, B1lly.

    I’d rather see that than Militwit kiss a bust of Kinnock…

  52. 52
    engleberk humperdick says:

    They only moderate her because she’s a threat to their cozy little love-in.

  53. 53
    skip of fools says:

    “nobody in their right mind would vote for them to take over!!!”

    Are most of the electorate in their right mind though?

  54. 54
    nellnewman says:

    Even if they ditch militwit who are they going to put in as leader? balls? the screeching wife of balls? david militwit the bananaman?, bliar the warmonger(says he wants to come back!)?, hattyharpic?

    They don’t have anyone. Labour is at it’s lowest point ever. No credible leaders, no policies, no common sense only a criminal desperation to hold onto to some sort of power and access to money strings for personal benefit.

  55. 55
    AC1 says:

    It’s a mysteron why you still hang around here anon.

  56. 56
    Archbishop Phoney £rd Way B£iar, sanctimonious git and £iar, emoting and wiv stupid grin, says:

    Hi!! I’m very VERY wealthy!! Thanks to NooLieBore – a scam I created for that very purpose!

    But I’m here now to stake my claim to become PM again, AND to be the boss of the EUSSR!

    There! – that’s the kind of straight talking you expect from me – coz I’mastraightkindaguy! And Cherry says so too! Tone, she says, – you’re astraightkindaguy and you should be PM again, – then we can get more dosh!

    Anyway, – must fly, – just ensuring my bank isn’t tainted with any kind of scam – nowotoimean?? Wink wink!!

  57. 57
    AC1 says:

    It’s Gromit the Were-leader

  58. 58
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Oi – leave my favourite Shropshire lass alone, thanks.

  59. 59
    AC1 says:

    those fake tits are crap.

  60. 60
    nellnewman says:


    The Dear Militwit Leader is demanding a full inquiry into Banking ‘to shine a light into it’s every corner’!!!


    bliar called the hutton Inquiry, gordon called the chilcot Inquiry and militwit has claimed the leveson Inquiry as his own. They’ve all whitewashed & hidden the truth, tolerated the likes of bliar,brown and alycampbell telling the most appalling lies and been the finest examples of obfuscation ever whilst costing us the taxpayer £millions; £millions that have then been ‘paid in wages’ to judges and lawyers that are the friends of labour.

    hutton, chilcot and then leveson have never shone a light anywhere and never will!

    Yes we really want another Inquiry militwit! Or maybe given his vociferous support for one he’s got some friends in the legal profession he wants to make rich so that they’ll support his election bid in 2015!

  61. 61
    something rotten in cchq says:

    Alas poor Margaret, I knew her well.

  62. 62
    Anon says:

    Anon to you mate, and don’t you fucking forget it.

  63. 63
    Engineer says:

    There would be no tribunal, just instant summary ritual disembowelling, probably live on air.

    A similar situation with a Hattie Harman mug would have resulted in instant promotion.

  64. 64
    Forkbender says:

    Now that is what I call idol worship

  65. 65
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    “They don’t have anyone. Labour is at it’s lowest point ever.”

    Labour don’t need anyone. Other than Cameron. They just have to sit back and let Cameron lose. Cameron’s very exposed, he flip-flops, U-turns, capitulates, changes his mind, seems disinterested, not bothered, bored, always running after events, not leading. He has the sickening stench of failure about him.

    Labour just need to wait to see how things pan out and then easily outflank Cameron, particularly on the issue of an in/out EU referendum, which Cameron has committed himself – in the face of overwhelming public demand for one – to not holding (bizarrely, because it would have destroyed UKIP and gained the Tories a 10% increase in votes – votes they desperately need.)

    A strong commitment from Labour on immigration would also outflank Cameron, who has also completely flunked that issue, with immigration rising under his government. In fact, most incredibly, Labour could outflank Cameron on the national debt, which is set to rise by £400billion under Cameron’s lunacy.

    And then there’s Cameron’s “armchair general” defence cuts, which may look very very foolish if we’re involved in any sort of war in the next 3 years.

    I’m not saying I want Labour to win, I’m just saying it would be a piece of p*ss for them to do so, even with Miliband as their leader.

  66. 66
    DDC says:

    don’t forget the ever so cheap blo0dy sunday enquiry. I’ve no idea what the outcome was, or if there ever was one, but…

  67. 67
    nellnewman says:

    Thought this blogpost by IanWatson encapsulated the banking issue very nicely:

    “Britain’s biggest banks are entering one of the most challenging periods in their history, as they increasingly get found out for despicable practices to which the Labour governments of Tony Blair and Gordon Brown turned a blind eye, and which Labour’s disastrous “light touch” approach to regulation allowed to flourish unchecked”

  68. 68
    Ex Conservative Voter says:

    I think we definitely should. I also know ‘we’ definitely won’t.

  69. 69
    Useless Portrait Photographer Alert says:

    If you look closely at her right foot (the one she’s sitting on), it looks like she’s either farted and had a bit of follow-through, or she’s got gangrene.

  70. 70

    A nonce, I think, Anon.

    Fuck you very much.

  71. 71
    nellnewman says:

    given that this shambles has originated from gordon and balls time in the Treasury and that some bankers are saying they were pressured by the gordon’s treasury to manipulate the libor rate I suspect it is not just the bankers who should be prosecuted!

  72. 72
    nellnewman says:

    So is sarahbronuk twittering her husband’s ‘innocence’ again tonight.

    He never even knew the banks existed.He never pressured the banks to manipulate the libor rate because he and balls never knew what it was.He never knighted fred the shred that was a damned lie. He never manipulated the Lloyds boss to buy HBOS and all it’s debts to the detriment of LLoyds shareholders. He never sold gold at brownbottom. He never trashed the UK economy………….

  73. 73
    The Buzzword Comhoonety says:

    “Who will throw ALL of them in jail ?”

    I’d like to throw you in jail, for using the vacuous phrase “going forward”.

  74. 74
    concrete pump says:

    Anon, the Joey Deacon of order_order.com.

  75. 75
    Lezzas are lezzas cos men won't touch them says:

    She was certainly ugly enough to be a lezza.

  76. 76

    Whilst I understand what you are saying, I will take the most enormous risk and say that I would not crawl over her to get to you…

  77. 77
    The Golem says:

    Sorry Tim, Cameron has proved himself a placeman. In other words, I don’t believe it even before whatever it is is announced.

  78. 78
    Anon says:

    In your dreams you filthy cuпt.

  79. 79
    engleberk humperdick says:

    Oh, OK. Suck on this, then:

  80. 80
    nellnewman says:

    Queen Victoria was actually a beauty in her time. If you compared her to people like the eagle sisters she was a complete stunner.

  81. 81
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    A better idea would be a world cup of religious nutters where the Muslim Brotherhood could meet the American Daughters of the Revolution in a penalty shootout using cannons.

  82. 82
    Anonymous, SW1 says:

    you annoyed many people without leving your bedroom. Well done!

  83. 83
    Anonymous, HA4 says:

    Fucking easy-peasy, darlin.

  84. 84
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    It’s such a shame the Blessed Mugrat can’t follow this exchange – it would remind her of those cabinet exchanges between Norman Turdpit and anyone who disagreed with him.

  85. 85
    Anonymous, EC1 says:

    I want my mummy.

  86. 86
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    If she was stoned on air it is obvious that she would be a Sky presenter (or possibly a member of the Stones).

  87. 87
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    And what does Theresa May have to do with this?

  88. 88
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    David Beckham’s first words after Victoria’s op?

  89. 89
    Anonymous, SW1 says:

    You’ll be back, I presume?

  90. 90
    Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

    To be fair Eric Pickles is a stunner compared to the Eagles sisters.

  91. 91
    PC clitoris says:

    Camoroon is a failed disinterested Tory toff.If Labour put Darling as leader I’ll even vote for the buggers.Anything would be better than this lot even the Womens Institute.

  92. 92
    Sarah Brown says:

    “Gordon..Gordon..get off that order-order site. They don’t care about your version of the truth. ..leave it Gordon..its not worth it.”

  93. 93
    Saturday Night's all right says:

    Only in Britain can drunken yobboes roam our streets all night but peaceful Tennis fans must go home at 11 on a Saturday night.

  94. 94
    Anonymous, HA4 says:

    Maybe, baby. I sees thru most every bullshitter.

  95. 95
    Mr monopolies and mergers says:

    Lloyds have to sell those branches they bought anyway.
    What a massive mistake. Bankrupted by McDoom for no gain only pain.

  96. 96
    Saturday Night's all right says:

    OK I give up what was the bad word?

  97. 97
    Modbotted says:

    Help…what did I say that was so bad?

  98. 98
    BBC -triumphal & live from Tahrir Sq says:

    Look, you’re just not seeing what a wonderful sense of change there is in the air here! To elaborate on that statement..woooooooooh! Wooooooooooooooh!

  99. 99
    Confucius, He says:

    *In a West Country accent* There be two types of bullshitters:

    Rich ones and poor ones.

    *sitting ovation*

  100. 100
    So many names, so little to say says:

    do us a limerick, Rick

  101. 101
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    You decide if QV was a looker in her day– this is she, in the era I was referring to with the ladies of the bedchamber, and Der Prinz:

  102. 102
    The internet is entirely populated by turds like you says:

    Go on, Rick! Give it your best shot.

  103. 103
    Ed Balls-up says:

    I’m renowned for my light touch.

  104. 104
    Ed Millibandwagon says:

    Find me a different bandwagon each week and I’ll jump on it.

  105. 105
    EdBallsMutteringIdiot says:

    Is that you Tom, Ed, Yvette, Liam, Andy, Edenoid, Gordon, Neil , Leonard, Harriet …?

  106. 106
    Guido says:

    Please stop dumping on my blog, Ewaname.

  107. 107
    cunt by name, cunt by nature says:

    She’s happier sucking a raghead’s cock.

  108. 108
    shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiite says:

    hadnt heard that in 25 years. could handle 1.29seconds of her screeching before it had to be turned off.

  109. 109
    Ken LyingScum says:

    They’ll be sure to help me bring the Bacon to Londistan

  110. 110
    Gordon Brown says:

    But Sarah darrrhhling – I must – I MUST! – it’s the only way to ensure my Legacy is unsullied!

    And it may help to set me up as the best candidate to become President of the World Bank . . . . or the EUSSR! . . . . or . . . .

  111. 111
    The Telegraph says:

    Lord Matthew Oakeshott of Seagrove Bay, the Coalition’s former Treasury spokesman in the House of Lords, said that Mr Diamond should resign.

    “Bob Diamond cleaning up Barclays would be like Madonna becoming a nun – Diamond must go and the criminals must be charged and convicted, whether in Barclays, or other banks, brokers or hedge funds,” said the peer, who resigned from the Government over the “soft” treatment of banks.

    “The last government had a three monkeys policy for the City – hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil. Not so much ‘light regulation’ as don’t touch regulation.”

  112. 112
    Hades says:

    I’ve got a hand cart

  113. 113
    Boarder Patrol says:

    Comings and goings

  114. 114
    Victoria says:

    Oi! wotuonabrt?!! shurrup!! moi tits r orlroit they r an daveybabe gets right attched to em wen he’s in the mood dontchababe?

  115. 115
    A. Bull Dyke says:

    Too right

  116. 116
    Evadne says:

    Don’t I know it!

  117. 117
    Well it's a thought says:

    Bliar, Brown and all Chancellor of the Exchequers should be in front of an honest judge(if we have any) for aiding and abetting.

  118. 118
    The Paragnostic says:

    “like dog shit rolled… etc.”

    You’ve been to the Kirkcaldy branch of Thorntons, haven’t you?

  119. 119
    The Paragnostic says:

    I can’t help thinking that the terms of reference of all these pro-Labour enquiries must include some sort of reverse Augean Stables motif, encouraging piles and piles of horseshit to cover the dirty deeds of the Comrades.

  120. 120
  121. 121
    Cameron is a Balloon says:

    There is a certain Jerry Lewis look about him. A unattractive combination of lunacy, stupidity and being spoilt rotten.

  122. 122
    Ah! Monika says:

    Compare and contrast


  123. 123
    blip says:

    You’ve been looking at Winterhalter’s paintings – he photographs tell a different story:


    (scroll down to bottom of page)

  124. 124
    Dave Figgley says:

    Ha ha, mate. Get her.

  125. 125
    JH says:

    Ms Decker once had a top fan sneak into her dressing room and leave an appreciative ‘deposit’ over one of her tops. She said judging by the sheer volume of love wee, it may have been an Elephant.

    Do we have a contender, MC?

  126. 126
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Ermm, let’s just say that in any real-life situation, if that was all there was available, I wouldn’t categorically rule her out, though closing-time beer goggles would most definitely need to be employed. (I am assuming that, for these purposes, she would not be the Queen; but if she were more homely, she’d NEED to be the Queen, and I’d have to close my eyes and think of England.)

  127. 127
    JH says:

    Could the French bird finally have been usurped as the Order-Order video goddess of favour?

  128. 128
    Terrytory - Gateshead's finest says:

    Constitues eos principes super omnem terram: memores erunt nominis tui,Domine, in omni progenie et generatione.

    Dominus Vobiscum

    Et cum spiritu tuo

    Feast of Sts Peter & Paul, offertory verse according to 1962 Missal.

    (thought I would bring a bit of ecclesiastical culture to this benighted world.)

  129. 129
    Was it Gorgon? says:

    Gordon? He’s bad, he’s very bad, he’s so bad that the bad consider him bad. The only person who does not think him bad is Sarah, Sarah is the most forgiving person he knows.

  130. 130
    Timothy N Mann says:

    Nothing new under the Sun or closed roof. Andy “anyone but the English” Murray scrapes through. again. He’ll most probably win the next one, when after that he is certain to go out.

    If it were not for the total lack of brown faces at tennis matches tournaments I would have suspected a betting fix but in Murray’s case I will give him the benefit of the doubt of just being quite good, not world class and doomed to almost made it.

  131. 131
    Timothy N Mann says:

    This Mod Bot is certainly off on one.

  132. 132
    Star Watch says:

  133. 133
    Aunty Matter says:

    The left really do have some brass neck. Now we have the usual suspects (BBC.Guardian and Indy) trying to blame the Tories for the whole Libor mess whilst even denying just WHO was in charge and responsible for the bank regulation during the time all this fiddling was going on. And you know what, the BBC will probably succeed just as they’ve managed to convince the proles that Leveson is JUST about Murdoch and phone hacking.

    Cameron really needs to act fast on this, a public inquiry is required but into the actions of Labour and their handling of bank regulation (or lack of) over 13 years.

    If he doesn’t do this, the Tories really are mongs.

  134. 134
    AC1 says:

    Tim to take your medicine again anon.

    Get well soon.

  135. 135
    AC1 says:

    Time to take your medicine again anon.

    Get well soon.

  136. 136
    The One that got away says:

    TOTAL BOLLOCKS. A Public Inquiry should be called on MP’s expenses.

    The fuckers are still at it but pretending that it is all Kosher now.

  137. 137
    not a machine says:

    I dont think I can add anything , I started off on my eurosceptic journey many years ago , with a hatred of its food and fisheries polices . Over the years I watched how EU directives worked , and his small livelyhood get destoyed , repeated in other areas of production .
    Having being scolded time after time for not accepting its modernity , and the bandwagon , I find it funny that in order to complete its visage , it needs yet more money , as it is now in the position , not of draining economies , but of sufficent mass to be administering its wonk unto its own .
    Labour had us wired into the mess , the EU wishes to sail the course it has chosen , the PM poses an interesting question about how lashed too , where the EU is going , we should be .
    It perhaps denies the likes of me , who would be happy with just a simple trade n travel sort of EU and burning the treaties , with 3 days of rejoicing and bell ringing , but then quite a few of us have been used to being on the fringes with anger , rather than considering some other re arrangements .

    It feels a bit partial to me , but then again I may have missed somthing , which any ideas the PM has may work , although it is a little difficult to stomach , having gone through a recent conservative period , when such views as mine were treated as negative and backward looking .

  138. 138
    Earwig O again says:

    Please do not confuse ‘disinterested’ with ‘uninterested’. They are worlds apart in meaning.

  139. 139
    Earwig O again says:

    According to Yahoo, Cameron has said that the vast majority of Brits do not want an EU ref, but has magnaimously also stated that he will hold one ‘when the time is right’.

    So that’s OK then.

  140. 140
    Earwig O again says:

    Is that a hint to Tela Viv to Please Buy Up Huddersfield? Need a few more settlements?

  141. 141
    Gordon Brown says:

    It’s the way I pack ‘em.

  142. 142
    Pop says:

    The Sunday Times say Chuka has admitted to smoking dope

  143. 143
    albacore says:

    It’s sackcloth and ashes for us ordinary folk
    That Matthew Parris reckons that we can’t take a joke
    And when all’s said and done and you get down to brass tacks
    It’s our fault we forced Gordon and the rest of the quacks
    To shower us with blessings and unpaid-for riches
    Well, that’s Matthew’s gospel. Don’t it leave you in stitches?

  144. 144
    Bald old git says:

    Tim Montgomerie is wrong on both counts.

    This is not a move and it’s not substantial. This is classic dog whistle politics – he’s making the gesture in the hope that it will be taken for the deed.

    When he announces the timetable for legislation for the referendum; that’s substantial and that’s a move.

    Until then, he can just relax and listen to the sound of barking from the kennels …

  145. 145
    M Oddbott says:

    Everything in moderation (abstinence included).

  146. 146
    Anonymous says:

    Suggest you don’t hold your breath;he’s just a PR man playing the game.

  147. 147
    Lou Scannon says:

    The twat in no. 10 is at it again :



    Dave, try and get this through your thick skull : Europe and the EU are two completely different things.
    Europe is a collection of countries which border each other.
    The EU is a CRIMINAL organisation which seeks to make slaves of us all in perpetuity.

  148. 148

    Martin Vander Weyer is a journalist who has come from banking. In this article, he has hit the nail bang on the head. He has identified all the industry failings that I have been pointing to here and elsewhere for some years now.

    Gordon Brown was an absolute disaster from start to finish. That is without any slightest shadow of doubt. But even someone of such stupendous incompetence as he could not have created this omnishambles alone.

    Until the industry starts to behave with some responsibility, we shall never be able to recover.


  149. 149
    Adam Werritty says:

    I blame the fuckin British Electorate.

    these stupid retards returned Labour to power three times with bleedin landslide majorities.

    The Press just stood there and let it happen.

  150. 150
    Adam Werritty says:

    I saw the Hoc menu list last week and there was nothing Kosher on it and most certainly was not compliant with little Lord Snooty’s pre election promises.

  151. 151
    phil from the wrekenton seven stars says:

    Is there any truth to the rumour I heard last night that the CSA are going to Court to get that photo banned because it offends the rules of natural reproduction.

  152. 152
    Bogeyman says:

    Soddit. He’s just gone up in my estimation.

  153. 153

    Great picture , although i fear her Muzzie employers will be gathering rock as we speak

  154. 154

    Reports this morning credit Call me Useless as scrapping yet another law that will turn around this economy boost jobs and put two fingers up to this recession
    He has abolished the law forbidding marriage before 8 am and after 6 pm

    When was the last time a PM had his finger so firmly on the pulse of the nation

    He makes Gorgon McMad look sane

  155. 155
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Next weeks headline grabbing law change !

    Scrapping VAT on 8 track stereo’s and video recorders

  156. 156
    UKIP.I.AM says:

    This ‘culture’ thing is nonsense. People are people and greed will dominate every profession. Look at GPs. What is wrong with banks is the regulations under which bankers are allowed to operate in this country. Bankers will be greedy in any country but it seems only the UK has had serial abuse of banking.

    Let’s put it this way. It is not the fault of East Europeans for flocking over to this country. The blame lies totally with the chumps who allowed them to come here.

  157. 157
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    He can promise what he wants , he wont be in power to implement it !
    All three of the lying fuckers promised us a referendum last time
    All three lied ,
    Cameron is only trying to piss on Labour’s parade as they are going to offer it (yet again)
    The key words here are “when the time is right” Which conveniently will never be in the eyes of the political classes as they reap all the financial “rewards” from it
    It’s just like the Jimmy Carr tax thing the other week , Cameron had said he would publish his tax returns and encourage all MP’s to do the same , When Carr got fingered he “U” turned on that one as well as he realised that is how most MP’s launder their ill gotten gains as well

  158. 158
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Great picture but which one is more plastic ?

  159. 159
    Paddy Power says:

    You can have a free bet if in Andy Murray’s next game he will not have some injury which he will be able to use as an excuse if he loses the game.

  160. 160
    Tomorrow's Chip Wrapperury dies away....nothing very much will have happened at all says:

    It wasn’t worth the wait Tim…it’s mostly “bullshitting the masses”(again)


  161. 161

    I’d do her and i’m no lorry driver

  162. 162

    So it’s true !
    Nell was one of her lezzer chambermaids

  163. 163

    There is no “it” in Conservative party , It’s “ti”

  164. 164
    UKIP.I.AM says:

    And of course, as with every other lawbreaker, there should be tough penalties for any banker breaking those laws.

  165. 165
    Nuke London says:

    She’s probably on a bit of wasteland in Tower Hamlets right now, with her head poking out of the ground and the police ‘service’ refusing to intervene for “cultural reasons”.

  166. 166
    Envy watch says:

    Lol chippy this morning are we inglishman ? How are the inglish tennis players doing btw ?

  167. 167
    Confused says:

    So are you blaming the electorate or the press?

  168. 168
    Nuke London says:

    They might try the Margaret Moran defence.


  169. 169
    Sir Aston Martin says:

    True. My eyeballs glazed over 8 seconds after the start of the radio report last night.

  170. 170
    What a racquet says:

    Tennis is a game for poofs.

  171. 171
    The Lesson unto Noo (Utterly Confused) Progressive Cons is taken from the Book of Dave, Chapter 94 says:

    1. And it came to pass that Dave, being swallowed up in his own conceit and deceitfulness, calléd the common people unto him and spake unto them, saying: Behold, I am clothed in purple and silver and gold. Moreover, I dineth only with those that are of like mind, and well-heeléd withal.

    2. Yet, of my generosity I findeth time to proclaim unto the common people, and those of no funds. And I suffereth them to draw nigh unto me. And I utter edicts unto the people, even laws.

    3. Saying, thou common people shalt obey laws of honesty, and moreover, even of probity and openness. And thou shalt declare unto those that collect taxes all that thou hast, and all that of thy wives, thine hand maidens, thy servants and thy slaves, even unto the last groat and farthing. And thou shalt draw up an account declaring all thy past goings and comings, and thine income and thine outgoing, thy writing upon parchment and thy scripts and declarations, even those that are entered upon privily.

    4. And all this shalt be upon thine oath, and thou shalt suffer dire punishment and torment ere thou faileth in this, or to be in all matters righteous and honest to the last scruple.

    5. But for those that are money lenders or runneth Banks, whose cup runneth over with gold and silver and fine silks, and for whom mistresses and servants and fine dining are but normal and expected, these, even these and their confidants, they shall not be so obliged to answer and declare and admit and prove and show that which is hidden. They shall ascend unto the highest place and sit down on mine right hand. For they are welcome in my sight and talketh that which is music in mine company, yah, even twaddle, for that is good in mine social scene.

    6. For to him that hath shall be given: even riches, pressed down and running over.

    7. But to him that hath not, shall be taken away, even unto the last farthing.

    8. For I am Dave. And I am deceit incarnate, and an lackey and toady unto the mighty one that lordeth it over all, even he that hath ascended up unto an high place, he that I am beholden unto, and whose hand cobbled shoes I am not worthy to unloose.

    Here endeth the Levyson and any other Inquiry.

  172. 172
    Sir Aston Martin says:

    Oh dear, what will Nigel do when he finds out his Herman has been unfaithful?

  173. 173
    Sir Aston Martin says:

    There is no such thing as a “good spot”. Clearasil is your friend.

  174. 174
    Can't remember he's Schrödinger's twat says:

    Mornin mate! How’s your ruddy great cock? Shoved it up some piccaninnies lately? Hahaha…

  175. 175
    beam me up snotty says:

    Fuck me, what weird parallel universe is this?

  176. 176
    jam nobbler says:

    don’t forget us! the labour party sound reinforcement crew!

  177. 177
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    I wouldn’t mind kissing the blondes thatch

  178. 178
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Shit the bed again you Cripple ?

  179. 179
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Whats best for Britain Dave is if you fuck off and let someone who has a clue take over , before you condemn us to another 20 years of Labour

  180. 180
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    At least i have a cock spaz boy
    not a plastic tube with a bag on’th end

  181. 181
    Gonk says:

    Sid James cackle

  182. 182
    Gonk says:

    I would pay more attention to my fucking dog than anything Baron Oakeshott, seventh evacuation of the great bowel had to say about this “Banking crisis”.

  183. 183

    You are entitled to your opinion Mr UKIP.I.AM. (Why do people call your party a single issue party, I wonder?*)

    I actually don’t disagree with your regulations point one bit. But just to say that it is legal to jump over a cliff does not mean that everyone has to do so.

    My banking career started at the lowest rung in 1966. It ended in 2000 on the highest rung. Therefore, whilst not believing myself to be infallible, I make a claim to be speaking with some experience.

    Simplistic thinking tempts people to think that when they have identified a cause, then that must necessarily be the only cause. They forget to look further (* refer back). To pin blame on the regulators is perfectly reasonable. To imagine that it all stops with that is sheer fantasy and will simply lead to a repetition of this godalmighty mess.

  184. 184
    Can't remember he's Schrödinger's twat says:

    tut tut Frankie, a civil ‘good morning’ would have been nice before we got down to business ffs? I hope you’re not like this with your rent boy tarts.

  185. 185
    Ah! Monika says:

    Am I alone in wanting out of the EU whether or not it is our best financial interests. I may be better off living with the wealthy family over the road, but I hate their guts.

    Is the EU what Count Robert de La Rochefoucauld fought for? Read this it will make you weep


  186. 186
    David Fflip-Fflop Cameron says:

    No-one can call me a chinless wonder any more.

  187. 187

    Alan Clarke used to say that a younger woman was more cunnilingually compatible.

  188. 188
    Ah! Monika says:

    Now there’s a WAR HORSE

  189. 189
    you lying little twat says:

    Sorry Hague, but no-one’s buying your EU deceit any more, Eddie Waring accent n all.
    You can fuck right off. We dont believe a word that comes out of your mouth.

  190. 190
    Mong Patrol says:

    You’re up early for a Sunday, tat. Or haven’t you been to bed yet?

  191. 191
    Gonk says:

    But replace it with one banning a splash about in the Thames.
    Bossy twats

  192. 192
  193. 193
    Memories I'd like to erase says:

    That, and you don’t have to look at an abdomen that resembles a bowl of semolina.

  194. 194
  195. 195
    Mealy-mouthed Camoron says:

    When I said, quite emphatically, that I would NOT allow you to have a referendum on the EU, I was mis-understood; what I actually meant was I MIGHT let you have a referendum on the EU. Or possibly not. Sometime. Maybe.One day. Never. I hope this clears up the confusion.

    Toodle pip!

  196. 196
    Can't remember he's Schrödinger's twat says:

    nudge, nudge, wink, wank…..

  197. 197
    Hair Flick says:

    Aha! Ze madonna viz ze big boobies haz been found again.

  198. 198
    Anonymous says:

    Shutus the fuckus upus.

  199. 199
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Yea, verily, thou spe*akest truly, in sooth, though thy rendering of William Tyndale-style grammar and syntax requireth a bit of working-on.

  200. 200
    Ah! Monika says:

    By David Cameron AGE 11

    It is vital for our country — for the strength of our economy, for the health of our democracy and for the influence of our nation — that we get our relationship with Europe right.
    We need to be absolutely clear about what we really want, what we now have and the best way of getting what is best for Britain. We need to answer those questions before jumping to questions about referendums.
    {‘absolutely’ and ‘really’ in the same sentence. } Absolutely that’s really really impressive.

  201. 201
    Hair Flick says:

    He cannot simultaneously be a Tory and disinterested.

    Bloody Labour ejerkashun at work again.

  202. 202
    UKIP.I.AM says:

    Cameron’s promise of referendum when the time is right is even less convincing than the cast-iron guarantee he gave in the past. Time the Tories had a new credible leader with credible Tory policies. The nearest there is to that is Nigel Farage.

  203. 203
    Judge Jeffries says:

    I’m free (both time and money wise).

  204. 204
    I don't need no doctor says:

    It’s fixed for Murray to win this year. Why, because it’s the Queens diamond jubilee. Remember when Virginia Wade won it? What was the Queens celebration then?
    Get your money on now.

  205. 205
    Gonk says:

    Promoted way above his pay grade.

  206. 206
    Mail Comments 1278 thumbs up says:

    Haha! Nice try dave, we’re not falling for it this time though! By November 2014 you’ll need the EU’s permission to hold referenda, something I’m certain you are aware of. Then you’ll just blame brussels, and once again we will have had the wool pulled over our eyes. Don’t fall for it again people. VOTE UKIP!
    – Chris, Isle of Wight, UK, EUSSR, 1/7/2012 2:02
    Click to rate Rating 1278

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2167049/Its-time-open-door-consider-referendum-Cameron-Britain-vote-Europe.html#ixzz1zMbiPfYK

  207. 207
    Hair Flick says:

    No surprise. We all know he is a first rate dope. Nice to have confirmation though.

  208. 208
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    I don’t need no rent boys
    I own you and your my bitch !

  209. 209
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    I’ve always said Oral sex is a matter of taste !
    Mornin mate !

  210. 210
    Nuke London says:

    Cheers for the link – I enjoyed the article very much. I’d only take issue with one point in it: “American and continental owners of City firms outbid each other to hire the smartest financiers”. Looking at the mess these people have made, ‘smart’ is not exactly the adjective that springs to my mind.

  211. 211
    Nuke London says:

    It was written by some 20-something lackey with a GCSE English, whilst Cameron sat back and played Angry Birds.

  212. 212
    Anonymous says:

    Your ramblings are as inane as your moniker.

  213. 213
    Nuke London says:

    This comment sums it up for me:

    “Too little too late…..you are finished Cameron!”

  214. 214
    just a voice in the wilderness says:

    Nigel Farage
    Credible leader – Certainly
    Credible Tory policies- Undoubtedly
    Supporters- a multitude from the disallusioned

    All he misses is a credible party of like minded politicians.

  215. 215
    ET says:

    No, you are not alone.

  216. 216

    I have always known when I’m licked.

  217. 217

    Agree completely.

    perception of smartest might have been better.

  218. 218
    Blair Waugh-Monger says:

    Congratulations Mr Fflip-Fflop, your transformation into Heath mkII is almost complete.

  219. 219
    cupcake says:

    Gromit the wish-I-were leader…

  220. 220

    While I am most certainly pro Europe I even like Farage – I do like his style, even if some of the high hied yins look bored as soon as he stands up. Wonder if it will become the English ip if the SNP go come out of the union but stay in Europe. What wories me most is that even on facebook some diehard tories are now spitting at how extreme the Tories have become. Was there ever a time when you could trust a politician to keep their word, to put the nation over party interests, to lead, to inspire people?

    Mind you what worries me most is that with all of these PPEs in government, while I dont know the course, I know a little of politics have an economics degree and write books on philosophy in daily life, so I do have a bit of a grasp of the combination – I mean surely an Oxford education should enable its graduates to THINK about such philisophical, yet vital to our daily life, issues such as the law of unitended consequences, and the importance of caution when changing a society?

    Or have our jedi masters all turned to the dark side?

  221. 221
    Charlie the Chump says:

    Yeah you are truly the son of Cod, how may we worship you o pescine master?

  222. 222
    Charlie the Chump says:

    A turd is more attractive than those two bewhiskered, hunchbacked crones

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