June 21st, 2012

Reeves Dumps Progress

With Labour figures nailing their colours to the mast over the Progress/GMB in-fighting, Guido is particularly amused by the decision of one of Ed’s most ambitious greasy pole climbing allies to lurch to the left. Rachel Reeves, who co-authored the “Purple Book“, quit as a Progress vice chair a few months ago. “More weathervane than foghorn” as one sighing Labour insider unkindly told Guido…

Meanwhile another prominent Labour tweeter has jumped ship the other way. GMB-sponsored Jamie Reed has slammed his union’s decision to outlaw Progress, announcing that he will be signing up to the under-fire faction in protest. There go his donations for 2015…


240 Comments

  1. 1
    Sandra says:

    How much did Rachel earn in bonuses in the city and what were her tax arrangements?

    We need to know.

    • 3
      B Boyd says:

      No we don’t. She isn’t a Conservative.

    • 13

      unlikely she will dump the Labour Friends Of Israel.

      • 24
        Major General Arnold Pocklington Penis says:

        With friends like her though, Israel could do worse than dumping her.

        • 136
          Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

          She is a perfect match for Israel. No principles and tries to squash anything that opposes her.

          • Sir Aston Martin says:

            Unlike Israel’s humane and friendly neighbours, of course.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            So 2 wrongs make a right eh?

          • john in cheshire says:

            I think you’ll find that Israel has more principles in it’s little finger than all the arabs and muslims in the world combined.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            Ah, Dick Sniffin of the Buggers Nutters and Perverts

      • 39
        JadedJean says:

        It was a strategy that worked for Tony.

      • 50
        AC1 says:

        Pity we can’t dump the infestation of Islam into the sea.

        • 104
          Stalin says:

          +1. Bring back the death penalty for anti-semitism. Ah, the good old days.

          • Archer Karcher says:

            O/T but amusing. An Aussie take on Barossoland and it’s slo-mo slide under the waves.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            I like Oz but any nation that elects as its leader an apparition known as the ‘gizzard of Oz’ due to the resemblance to a chicken head on a body should look in on itself.

          • Archer Karcher says:

            Gillard was narrowly elected on the basis of a pack of lies. Fool me once etc.

    • 26
      Britain the ruined country says:

      Talking of tax……………..according to Brillo this lunchtime Carr paid for his 8million pound London house in cash………………..His comedic ability isn’t worth £1 so where’s that come from?

      I think Mr. Carr may require more forensic investigation.

      • 32
        Victoria 'the tackle' Coren says:

        It’s a fooking horrible home too. £8 million quid and no taste, hee hee hee.

        • 46
          Billy Bragg says:

          He ‘as to sleep somewhere, dont he?

          –sent my my iPhone – Dorset —

      • 56
        M says:

        its amazing what you can earn on the comedy circuit in libya
        Just ask tony

      • 225
        CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

        Just think how much Carr could earn if he was actually funny.

    • 108
    • 113
      Penny says:
      • 117
        Marmite says:

        Sod off Penny, you daft cow.

      • 123
        AC1 says:

        Another reason Dave missed his chance (to de-extort the far-left AlJaBeebya) when he was elected.

        • 134
          Archer Karcher says:

          + 1 million.

          Dripping wet Dave probably thought he could hug the BeeB and they would suddenly become his buddies. Oops again.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            Nothing to do with it. Dave knows that if any of his cabinet get out of line a quick leak to the beeb will get them investigated. A traditional tool of PMs from both sides.

          • Boudicca says:

            Fuck me- do people actually think she’s worth reading?

          • Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

            And the last Labour minister to be investigated by the BBC was?

      • 186
        Tay King-dePisse says:

        I suppose you don’t have cable in your New York pied-a-terre? Oh, I forgot, you’re so rarely home, being the social butterfly you are. Can’t be arsed to turn the bloody thing on when you get home? Actually, just a minute of searching on my part turned up the fact that TimeWarnerCable, the cable provider for the island of Manhattan, carries BBC America, on which channel they present the BBC World Service News, which you can record to watch at your leisure, if you know how to set your DVR to do so.

      • 239
        Alan Rubbishbringer says:

        How dare you attack the graudina like that! Of course your public school colleagues would not let that happen to their public school alums.

  2. 2
    SAS NOT !!! says:

    Yawn

    How are YOUR’s and Iain Dales Tax avoidance scheme holding up Guido. Naughty Naughty

    • 5
      AC1 says:

      Because the government deserves the money Guido worked for, much more than Guido does obviously…

      • 8
        SAS NOT !!! says:

        Dod you see Iain on Skys press review last night..admitted that he uses the same scheme as Ken…Isnt Iain one of Guidos closest gay friends…I think he is

        • 11
          AC1 says:

          So you think the government should extort money from people it does nothing in return.

          You are pro slavery.

          I think it’s more than coincidence that Marxism emerged as more overt slavery was abolished.

          Ban Neo-Slavery, Ban Marxism

        • 14
          Snotty is projecting again. says:

          Mentioning his sexuality is important to the story because…?

          Why are you anti gay? Not very right on socialist is it?

      • 142
        Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

        Jimmy Carr deserves Guido’s money more than Guido, never mind the government.

    • 93
      Trahison des Clercs says:

      Back to School Snoddie.

  3. 4
    Jimmy says:

    Rachel Reeves is our first Labour woman PM in waiting. And you all know it.

    • 7
      AC1 says:

      It would still be a male Labour PM even if you put the job on an all woman shortlist!

      Remember in Labour, Nepotism beats equality every time.

    • 16
      Gok's Wang says:

      Her adenoidal problem is much worse that Milibland.
      And that Concorde nose will need some resculpting.
      And the essex vowels. And she looks quite saggy.

      Going to be at least two years on makeover.

      • 80
        Archer Karcher says:

        I know this may be a shock to Jimmy, but requires more than merely having a girls name to actually be classified as a female, even today.

    • 18
      Engineer says:

      I suspect she may wait a long time…..

    • 23
      Spot the Tranny says:

      I dunno. Looks like she’s hiding some meat and two veg down there.

    • 49
      Gonk says:

      As you’re on close personal terms with Rachel I’ve been instructed to
      ask how often she touches up her roots.

    • 52
      AC1 says:

      Only 35 years after Anti-equality Conservative Party elected a woman PM….

      Mrs Thatcher (PBUH)

    • 58
      Cat Fight says:

      Stella Creasy thinks otherwise.

      Only one way to find out…

    • 90
      Geoff, England (not Britain or 'United' KIngdom) says:

      Can’t see Liebore’s muslim constituency buying it. Old misogynist habits die hard. The ‘Andy Capp’ types in Liebore’s traditional heartlands in Scotland, Wales and the north of England won’t be too happy, either.

    • 98
      Trahison des Clercs says:

      Waiting a long time Jammy. Don’t hold your breath, or do in a plastic bag and save us all from your knuckle-dragging ,swivel eyed,foaming at the mouth (I think that’s
      the full quota) ravings.

    • 101
      Frightened Inmate #2 says:

      Really? She used to hang around chess tournaments in London in the 90s with her grungey boyfriend. She didn’t play, just used to mind the bookstall or help with the admin in some way. I think I bought a magazine from her once. Wouldn’t have identified her as a future PM to be honest.

    • 129
      Marmite says:

      Rachel Sneeze sounds like a Darlek with asthma.

    • 148
      Lord Stansted says:

      Indeed. The trouble is she’ll be an oap when it happens.

  4. 6
    Jago Frost says:

    Rachel Reeves seems to have cultivated a similar annoying nasal twang to that of dopey RedEd.

  5. 10
    Anonymous says:

    I don’t like the… way she talks like balls with… breaths in the completely wrong place of a sentence so… that the only way to get a word in would be. to interrupt and then have a go at you for….. interrupting.

    • 151
      Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

      At least Balls has an excuse – the need to fit breaths in between stufffing his face with lard butties.

    • 164
      Gonk says:

      It’s an interesting technique that works so well that no one in the BBC
      has worked this “Balls”strategy out. If Reeves has adopted the same technique
      she’ll similarly outfox them.

  6. 12
    SAS NOT !!! says:

    Look Blue noses, this nonsense isn’t gonna work. Let me explain. The list of people Dave and Co have utterly hacked off are as follows

    Nurses
    Teachers
    Civil servants
    Doctors
    Council workers
    Celebs
    Steel workers
    Low paid workers
    Poor OAP’s
    Wealthy OAP’s
    School Children
    Parents
    Mothers
    Women
    The Scots
    The Welsh
    Charity workers
    Rural communities

    The list goes on and on, all directly affected by Dave “No Mates” Cameron

    You can harp on about The Falklands and Union Jacks on driving licences, no one gives a toss about such issues. Incomes are falling and the feel good factor isn’t gonna materialise. Not a single voter gives a monkey about Rachel Reeves

    • 15
      Loyalist says:

      Absolutely right, SAS Not. This has to have been the most boring Guido week ever. Meanwhile, over on Scrapbook…….

    • 19
      SAS Snott !¥¥¥¥ says:

      Why are women and mothers separate? All mothers are women?
      And poor OAPs and rich OAPs are just OAPs

      You are a product of the Dr (not medical but on strike in sympathy) Clarke school of boring lists and exaggerated graphs.

      I claim my £5 funded from the taxpayers into lefty think bollocks tanks.

      • 28
        David Furnish says:

        How dare you? Just because i’m a fudge packer doesn’t diminish my maternal role.

    • 27
      Anyone for wiff waff? says:

      Mr Murdoch isn’t exactly laughing his conkers off either.

    • 48

      I’ve told you once, Snotty – just listen:

      IS Millbank Tower quiet this morning, as all the policy advisors are busy licking the windows clean?

      Just change this to “Snotty” in your head and enjoy:

    • 85
      Owain Glyndwr says:

      SAS, you a sillyboy, what are you a silly boy, playtime has ended back to class or teacher will make you sit on the naughty step

      • 155
        Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

        It doesn’t really work, being lectured by the welsh. Its a bit like being taught cricket by the germans.

    • 96
      Anonymous says:

      Well perhaps if Labour hadn’t pissed the nation’s wealth up the wall there’d still be some money to go round.

    • 121
      AC1 says:

      If parasites are wriggling in pain, it’s a good sign for the health of the host.

    • 170
      Anonymous says:

      Now produce a list of those people Labour hacked off during 13 years in power….

    • 190
      GORDON McBUST says:

      You forgot your own peer group Benefit Scroungers !

    • 227
      CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

      Snotty, you forgot the main group Dave has pissed off……Tory voters!

  7. 17
    Penfold says:

    It’s like a Stalinlite purge, people rushing around and getting into a another line behind another putative brilliant brain, until he’s shown to be mal-thinking and having bourgeois thoughts and ideas.

    These people never have an original thought, to do so what be individualistic and dangerous and so horribly un-socialist.

    • 21
      SAS Snott !¥¥¥¥ says:

      I liked Kirov.
      But he was assassinated. Like Trotsky.
      What’s great is the Marxists STILL spin it as a necessary evil to safeguard commie land.
      Not as a mad dictator executing his rivals after a coup.

      Cretins the left. Utter cretins.

      • 51

        +1 icepick, that made his ears burn ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪

        • 62
          Totty's Dream says:

          • fuck you yet again BBC says:

            Aaah, the Stranglers, the greatest band of the seventies ‘punk era’ (and beyond). More attitude, balls and ability than the rest of their contemporaries put together … so what do the BBC do in their recent documentaries covering that era. Yes, thats right, totally ignored them. Not worth a mention.
            Maybe they needed to be right-on lefties fuckwits like the Clash.

          • Alan Rubbishbringer says:

            The Clash were from public school unlike The Stranglers. Do try to keep up.

  8. 22
    Engineer says:

    The last time Labour lurched to the left (Foot), it took about a decade and a half to make it electable again.

    The events of Europe seem to making most people a bit more state-sceptic, so if Labour ignore that trend and consolidate a stateist position, they’ll probably regret it.

    Sounds OK to me – carry on lurching, chaps.

  9. 31
    ffs says:

    Is she one of their many token numpties?

    • 45
      Eric 'you lookin' at my pint' Joyce says:

      Can excise the token and it’s shooting fish in a barrel

  10. 34
    BREAKING WIND!!! says:

    Oh no!

    Moody’s will downgrade the ratings of UK banks this evening, Sky News is reporting.

    • 40
      Quick... says:

      Sell! Sell! Sell!

    • 43
      Steve Miliband says:

      Are those the ones propped up with taxpayers money?

    • 54
      JH says:

      About fucking time. Let’s get this extend-and-pretend bullshit out the way, and face the music. I’ve been positioning for this ponzi scheme of an economy going pop for seven years now, bring it on.

      Once we get a real crisis, public spending can be slashed and burned with the siren whines of the left simply ignored at long fucking last.

      Then we can get back to some genuine growth, rewarding the productive.

    • 73
      BREAKING WIND!!! UPDATE says:

      Mark Kleinman from Sky News says…

      “I’m told Moody’s will announce downgrades of some of world’s biggest banks, incl in UK, after US mkts close tonight.”

      • 212
        Haribo Halfwit says:

        Which, sadly, means that it will break too late to make him the lead item on their flagship ‘Jeff Randall Live’ programme. Since it runs Monday-Thursday evenings only, the initial spike-and-rebound will be a distant memory by the time the show next airs.

        Mark’s a great journalist – he’ll have other scoops that don’t get buried over the weekend as this rolling crisis plays out.

        • 223
          Anon. says:

          You are an underworked, overpaid, BBC ‘journalist’ and I claim my £5.00.

          You are also jealous of the superior, not to mention admirably unbiased, coverage of Business News on Sky.

  11. 37
    With a face like a pickle jar says:

    - who needs enemies?

  12. 44
  13. 53
    Internal strife at Labour towers says:

    Labour in-fighting? Yes please! Pass the popcorn.

  14. 55
    Foghorn Leghorn says:

    Oh, that woman, got a mouth like an outboard motor

  15. 57
    Carr crash says:

    Why has there been a deafening silence from the luvvies who usually condemn legal tax avoidance? Could it be because they do it themselves and don’t want to be found out?

    And more importantly, how does a talentless twat like Carr become a multi-millionaire to begin with?

    • 71
      Answers on a Post Card says:

      1. Because one of their own got caught out as a hypocritical double standard lefty wanker and they’re keeping their heads down.
      2. Yes.
      3. BBC.

      • 88
        • 187
          Grandfather clock says:

          Ah those were the (politically incorrect) days. Always enjoyed spending half an hour at kiosks reading all those lovely cards when I was younger.

        • 198
          FUNNIER THAN THAT RUBBER FACED TWAT says:

          But i never bought a liver sausage madam !

          • Polly Toynbee says:

            Message from her villa in Tuscany.

            Miss Toynbee wishes it to be known that :

            Tax avoidance is evil and deprives the poor of funds which would otherwise be used for their betterment.

            Also, it is a wicked Tory slurr to say that I sent my daughter to Westminster School for elitist reasons (fees £10,146 per term boarders and a mere £7026 per term for daygirls). This was done for reasons of travel, education and social support which only a bigot would be unable to understand.

            It is innacurate and a vile slur that I am a beneficiary of a tax free offshore trust.

          • David Cameron says:

            Speaking to ITV News during his trip to Mexico, the Prime Minister said

            ‘I think some of these schemes – and I think particularly of the Jimmy Carr scheme – I just think this is completely wrong.
            ‘People work hard, they pay their taxes, they save up to go to one of his shows. They buy the tickets. He is taking the money from those tickets and he, as far as I can see, is putting all of that into some very dodgy tax-avoiding schemes”

            Mr Cameron is a benefiiary of tax free offshore tust.

    • 100
      Jimmy Carr's mum says:

      Sucking cock, mainly.

    • 106
      Trahison des Clercs says:

      Oh, apparently he made a massive error of judgement.(BBC 1200 hrs) Yes he did. Being shown to be a hypocrite. Does that mean he’s going to cough up the tax he didn’t pay? Answers on £3 note.

  16. 60
    Another bandwagon for Labour says:

    I find it stomach turning the way Labour are trying to hijack the visit of Suu Kyi for PR purposes. The way they keep mentioning her, you’d think they had a hand in getting her freed. This is a characteristic of Labour we’ve seen before, like when Brown chased Obama into the UN kitchens for a photo op. By the end of today Miliband will be referring to “my friend Aung”.

    • 69
      Cllr Mustaffa councilhouse (Respec party) says:

      How many people in the UK were or still are under house arrest due to Labour’s anti terror laws?

    • 97
      Geoff, England (not Britain or 'United' KIngdom) says:

      Until a couple of weeks ago, she probably hadn’t even heard of him. What an arrogant sod he is.

  17. 64
    One Size fits all is an insult to our children says:

    True to form the Lefties are protesting because Gove wants to improve standards in state schools. Why do lefties always want to dumb down state education rather than strive for the best?

    I went from a Secondary modern to Grammar school and the standards of teaching were like chalk and cheese, so I know first hand that the state is capable of delivering a first class education when given the chance to do so. The flies in the ointment are the teachers though, only a handful of teachers at the Secondary modern were capapable of teaching O levels and of course not one was qualified to A level standard.

    • 66
      I don't need no doctor says:

      Labour back the dumb down state. Why, because they are labour voters!

    • 74
      Cllr Mustaffa councilhouse (Respec party) says:

      The GCSE exam ensures prizes for all you see.

      • 79
        Steve Miliband says:

        Labour made everyone clever ! just look at the exam results and the numbers at Uni’s.

        • 200
          Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

          Intelligence isn’t everything. The Oxford rugby club (not known as the brightest bunch at the uni) did everyone a favour in the mid 70s by beating several members of the Bullingdon to a pulp and pushing them underground for several years.

          • Anon. says:

            Then Thatcher did everyone a favour in the late 70′s by beating all of the members of the Labour Party to a pulp and pushing them underground for nearly 20 years.

          • Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

            Could be but my point was not political. The Bullies got beaten because one of them was stupid enough to insult the girlfriend of one of the team. Great fun though.

    • 78
      annette curton says:

      Education seems to be a ball that’s kicked about all over the place by successive governments but never finds the net, that’s what happens when political ideology takes over from common sense.

    • 81
      Raving Loon says:

      The teaching unions are educations biggest enemy.

    • 89
      Ah! Monika says:

      And they taught you to tell it as it is.

    • 115
      AC1 says:

      >I know first hand that the state is capable of delivering a first class education when given the chance to do so.

      Why give it the chance when the market is much simpler to achieve first class education!?

      The state’s role should be solely making sure children are the responsibility of their parents. Oh and we can all have a big cut in tax, so kids leaving schools have a job.

    • 192
      Where are Tony Blair's expenses says:

      The only chance working class kids have of beating the system is a Grammar School education not a bog standard comprehensive.

      We already have a two tier eduction system; any employer will tell you that they will not employ anyone if they have D and E grade GCSE unless it is to stack shelves

      Good old Shirley knew what to do, tell everyone they need a comprehensive education and then sent her daughter to a private school

  18. 65
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Ed Miliband should disclose his tax affairs with immediate effect. Why not, what has he got to hide. In fact the whole of the shadow cabinet should do the same.
    Does Miliband condone Carr’s action or will he do the usual and spout soundbites?

    • 201
      Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

      If I were Miliband (excuse me whilst I vomit at the thought) I would agree to do just that and enforce disclosure on all my MPs and Lords provided Dave does the same for his mob. The wriggling would be a joy to behold.

    • 229
      CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

      Perhaps RedEd can explain how he managed to avoid paying death duty on the big London mansion he inherited from his Commie dad.

      Does Ed have a tax dodge like his older brother – “The Office of David Miliband” – company which receives all of Dave’s earnings that’s only subject to 20% Corporation tax?

      Brown and Blair have the same arrangements.

  19. 68
    Postal Vote says:

    Labour should definitely promote Reeves as much as they can. That would dent their financial-economic credibility even further (if poss) since she was in the HBoS investor relations department when that bank blew up. So she was either ignorant or had no shame promoting the bank.

    • 202
      Tristram Smallbore-ffipps says:

      She was a munchkin which only leads to one question. What the hell is someone who was working as a munchkin only 3 years ago doing in a senior role?

  20. 70
    Where's Gordon says:

    Will Gordon pop up today for Suu Kyi’s speech and then return just as quickly to his cubby hole in Fife?

    • 105
      Gordon McMong says:

      I just can’t be arsed with any of it anymore.

      I’m the archetypal Scots benefit scrounger. I don’t work because the cheque comes whether I do or not. I’m resentful and ungrateful even though I do sweet Fanny Adams {which I think is the name of that woman who is here sometimes} for the cash.

      I’d rather watch countdown and C4 racing and tell anyone who knocks to ‘Fek off- can ye noo read ? ‘DO NOT FECKIN’ DISTURB. GENIUS THINKING.’

  21. 72
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Nice footage of Carr entering the BBC Television Centre on BBC News. No wonder they are making out it’s Cameron’s fault for Carr’s tax avoidance.
    Let the BBC come clean on tax avoidance within.

    • 83
      Loungelizard says:

      Good point but the luvvies are well protected, we’d be in for a long wait.

      • 160
        Aunty Matter says:

        Leftists don’t get it do they? C u n t z like Carr happily have a go at bankers for tax dodging whilst THEY are up to the same scam.

    • 230
      Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

      He’s a fellow lefty who’s been criticised by David Cameron. You didn’t think the BBC would let him get away with it, did you?

  22. 75
    Fred Goodwin says:

    Well that’s NatWest/RBS well and truly fucked so far today.

    What me worry !

    • 86
      David Cameron says:

      Keep calm and carry on.

      This is just a dry run in advance of the banking armageddon which is imminent

    • 110
      AC1 says:

      Apparently rather a few UK banks will get a downgrade this evening.

      Been leaked for ages, so don’t expect too much movement unless the get more notches down than expected.

  23. 77
    Steve Miliband says:

    That’s Jeremy Vinyl off for the nest half hour. Alyingstair Campbell on

    • 173
      Old Tory Bigot says:

      That hideous c unt Campbell is never off the BBC lately.

      What’s going on?

    • 182
      Gonk says:

      Boy, when you’re a favourite of the BBC you get a good list of gigs to attend.
      As with Peston my 6th sense kicks in almost before I hear the fucker and I
      can take appropriate action.

      • 224
        Old Tory Bigot says:

        Well at least the awful Peston is employed by them so can be excused for appearing.

        Campbell is a rancid liar and all-round nasty bastard but he’s on nearly every BBC programme at the moment.

        Does he have a book coming out or something?

        “How to Commit the Perfect Murder” – something like that.

  24. 82
    BREAKING WIND! says:

    Angela Monaghan of the Telegraph has more info on the UK bank downgrade.

    “It is thought that British banks including Barclays, HSBC and Royal Bank of Scotland are facing a cut in their ratings by as much as two notches, reflecting the continued impact of the eurozone crisis on the global banking system.”

  25. 84
    Half the population of the UK says:

    Absolutely.

  26. 87
    Sky advert says:

    £1000 off a Viking Cruise. Prices from £995

  27. 102
    Owain Glyndwr says:

    Barroso is a deluded communist idiot says nigel

    • 140
      Archer Karcher says:

      The left love to kick Fox in the balls at any opportunity, but they are the only guys actually to have identified the problem with the Euro and that Farage is the only guy telling the truth about it too.

  28. 103
    Well it's a thought says:

    I must thank Suu Kyi for pouring money into Britain to help us gain Democracy, oh hang on, you mean we are pouring money into your oil producing country even though we are bankrupt and printing money, something wrong somewhere .

  29. 107
    nellnewman says:

    Open civil war in the labour party. Long may it last.
    The civil war that is!

  30. 112
    Anonymous says:

    With this country basically fuc ked the Euro zone completely fuc ked our politicos seem to have more time for playground games than addressing the fundamentals to try and alleviate the situation. If they concentrated for 1/10 of the time they spent on this infighting and manoeuvring crap then there could be a chance to redeem this terrible economic situation. But then again children will be children regardless of age.

  31. 114
    Dave's Grave says:
    • 125
      Gordon McMong says:

      Do fucking well shut up.
      ITS HYPOCRISY to say “tax avoidance is a sin” and then practice it.

      Vodaphone, Camos mates, charity firms, even labour mps, have never pretended they would gratefully pay more tax than they should.

      Carr is doing a Livingstone, who was doing a Polly.
      Do as we say, not as we do…because we make money from telling you what you want to hear…even though we don’t follow our own advice..

      • 138
        Dave = Carr says:

        Yes but Dave is doing the same as Carr. Don’t forget Dave has taken out the biggest mortgage possible under MP’s expense rules to buy a house in the Chipping Norton set. At Leveson he kept on referring to it as his house, during the expenses scandal he was always careful to call it his constituency home where he retreated to to meet his constituents. But we now know he spent most of his time wining, dining, riding and shooting with the Chipping Norton set who though technically constituents are not in the spirit of why the taxpayer has bought him a house there. Dave is no different to Carr

        • 154
          Archer Karcher says:

          “Not in the spirit”

          Desperate, weak stuff D=C and I can’t stand the man ( Cameron ).

    • 127
      Anonymous says:

      Oh yeah! Do we have another U- turn likely in the near future?

      • 184
        Spin Doctor says:

        Dizzy, I’m so dizzy my head is spinning
        Like a whirlpool it never ends
        And it’s You Dave makin’ it spin
        You’re making me dizzy

        (With thanks to Tommy Roe)

    • 131
      Guido says:

      Perhaps someone could do a freedom of info request on which BBC staff / freelancers etc have money paid into offshore bank accounts? Also a list of those who are not on PAYE. Of course no one would suspect that any MP’s would take advantage of such schemes, but just in case…..

      Those people who are not paid via PAYE in any organisation should have an automatic 45% deduction at source. It should then be up to the individual (or shell company etc) to reclaim such tax or a proportion thereof upon proof that they are entitled to it.

      • 135
        oops says:

        ooops wrong monica – sorry guido

      • 159
        Ah! Monika says:

        It’s not difficult. Do it yourself. I did.

      • 231
        Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

        I’m afraid the BBC do not believe in freedom of information. In this respect they closely resemble the state-run organisations of the Soviet era.

  32. 116
    Andrew Lansley says:

    (visiting)

    …and how are you today doctor?
    oooohh,arrrrgghh my conditions have worsened
    …well, take two paracetemol and keep yourself warm

  33. 118
    Pete Stringfellow says:

    Did you say something about women and greasy poles?

  34. 119
    Gordon Brown says:

    My Father used a Parker Pen to write his sermons, that is why I made the correct decision to sell the gold

  35. 120
    CASH CONVERTER CAMERON says:

    Hi Peeps i would like to welcome Sushi Foo Young to downing street
    We in the UK are already the largest contributor of foreign aid to Burma
    That is why i am giving even more of our taxpayers money £3,000,000 to a peace deal to help stop fighting in the north
    later this year a large party of ministers and MP’s will be going on an all expenses paid jolly to Burma on a fact finding trip to see if indeed they also have slanty eyes , and it is also a country most of us haven’t added to the list of countries we have visited at your expense
    Toodle or should i say Noodle Pip !

    • 126
      hmm says:

      Getting better.
      Might even be readable in another couple of years.

    • 132
      Well it's a thought says:

      I thought she came help us to get democracy it seems she came for a bit of Camorons printed note paper

  36. 124
    Airmiles Andy says:

    I think I should lead a business delegation to Burma.

  37. 130
    Carr Crash says:

    Sorry (sorry I got caught ,that is)

  38. 137
    Gordon Brown says:

    It’s all thanks to me that Ling Ping Koo Chee is free. I personally negotiated her release in Bruma. I look forward to introducing her this afternoon.

  39. 144
    Gordon is a cock says:

    Oh my fucking god. Mong faced Gordon is in Westminster Hall for the speech. Poor Sarah’s been drafted in for bearding duties again. And now Grumpy is greeting Suu Kyi.

    • 165
      CASH CONVERTER CAMERON says:

      Slot Gob also on the front row
      While Toe is away on oil exploitation mission

  40. 149
    Bettr pay Up Jemima and Ken says:
  41. 152
    Ah! Monika says:

    Absolutleys falling thick and fast at Ascot. Really, Really.

  42. 153
    Gordon is a cock says:

    Poor Sarah looks very unhappy. She looks like she’d rather be anywhere else.

    Slotgob is talking to Gordon. Slotgob’s been attacking “yummy mummies” on the pretext that they’re doing a bad job of parenting. It couldn’t possibly be jealousy over the fact that no one’s ever called that hideous hag a yummy mummy. She’s so fucking ugly she could turn Hugh Hefner gay. And on the parenting issue, Slotgob has a nerve. Her twat of a son was face down in Leicester Square puking up and he and his pals got a ton of complaints for noise at one of the Bliar’s many holiday homes.

    • 195
      Where are Tony Blair's expenses says:

      The bitch has forgotton to mention she made a fortune by opening up a Chambers to specialise in Human Rights know that Bliar was going to bring in The Human Rights Act.

      Then given the opportunity to take a couple of gifts from a sports shop in Sydney went charging round with getting arms full of clothes like a chav in a supermarket challenge

      You really can’t make it up

    • 203
      Rachel Dratch says:

      Oh, for Christ’s sake, I’M yummier-looking than Cherie Blair. And that takes some doing on my part.
      http://www.superiorpics.com/pictures2/Dratch_JS5719285.jpg

    • 207
      Anyone for wiff waff? says:

      The only time that you could ever get close to feeling sympathy for Blair is when you realise that he’s had to stick his cock into that.

      • 217
        just saying says:

        For many women going back to work isn’t an option because of the high cost of childcare.
        Although that wouldn’t have bothered the Bliars.

  43. 156
    Aunty Matter says:

    The BBC are still in full defence of Jimmy Carr. Just why did Richard Bacon feel the need to get some Labour councillor to tell us that Carr is hard working and that he’s entitled to pay only 1% tax and that really the evil people are Cameron and his cronies.

    Clearly those are the views of the BBC but they had to get a non BBC person to say them.

    Pathetic.

  44. 162
    Gordon is a cock says:

    Oh fuck we have to endure another speech by Grumpy. Is there going to be another cringe inducing soundbite like his awful kaleidescope Queen speech? “She was the imprisoned leader of an imprisoned people in an imprisoned country of an imprisoned planet in an imprisoned galaxy.”

    • 171
      CASH CONVERTER CAMERON says:

      Didn’t stop that yank swimming across the lake To slip in and out under the noses of her guards

  45. 163
    Cherie Blair says:

    But I’m heroic too! Talk about me! I’m heroic and pretty and heroic and heroic!

    • 177
      CASH CONVERTER CAMERON says:

      You can do the Karaoki afterwards
      “When you get older losing your hair , in a few years from now
      Will you still be sending me ………………………………..

    • 208
      Anyone for wiff waff? says:

      I think “fat, dog ugly, scouse chav” would probably be more accurate.

  46. 168
    Question Whine says:

    Co-conspirators! On tonight’s Question Time are Ken Clarke, Andy Burnham, Len McCluskey and Ruth Lea. Fucking bland panel! Watch Babestation instead.

  47. 172
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Aung San Suu Kyi is taller than Bercow.

  48. 175
    That's All Folks! says:

    I must be late in coming across this joke but what’s the Foghorn Leghorn reference about? Does Reeves say “I say I say” a lot?

    • 191
      BBC = Labours Mouthpiece says:

      She’s a fucking loony toon so it fits well, besides she sounds like a foghorn with that droning monotone voice of hers. In fact if I didn’t know any better and you’d have told me she was Ed Miliband’s sister, I would’ve believed you.

      What is it with Labours talking heads? do they create these mongs on a production line in a laboratory somewhere?

  49. 178
    A mouth bigger than the Joker's says:

    Slotgob has porked up quite a lot. Has she been comfort eating over all the attacks on her poor Tony?

    • 218
      do me a favour says:

      I don’t know any women who’d take parenting advice from Cherie Blair.

  50. 180
    CASH CONVERTER CAMERON says:

    Feckin hell Camoron has just squeezed Millibands Knee !
    there will be more than political unions going on tonight !

  51. 232
    Zyklon Bunny says:

    Another traitorous Jooow in the higher echelons of the Labia party.


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Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”



orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?


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