June 14th, 2012

Guidogram Going Out Shortly

The Guidogram round-up of the week is going out shortly.

Thousands of Westminster insiders read the Guidogram, everyone from Downing Street insiders to Fleet Street never miss it. It’s been a Leveson bloodbath over the last few days so don’t miss out on the round-up. Yes we Cam…

Join the conspiracy and become a subscriber to the Guidogram, free, to keep in the loop. You’re either in front of Guido, or behind…


  1. 1
    But says:

    Would never miss it.

  2. 2
    A reader says:


  3. 3
    Yvonne from the Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    I can’t remember seeing one of them.

  4. 4
    Thanks, I can't wait! says:

    Problem: Mass sovereign indebtedness due to bank bailouts and government over spending.

    Reaction: I don’t want to lose all my savings and/or pension so please do something about it, anything at all!

    Solution: Giving up your counties sovereignty to pool this indebtedness so we can all pay it off together and this will solve the problem.

  5. 5
    Ah! Monika says:

    Whilst Dave had a quick sandwich between grillings, the Murdochs were having lunch here today. No worries.


  6. 6
    Scary Biscuits says:

    Guidogram going out shortly. Whoo-hoo!

    [link to inappropriate picture of Harvey Nichols model wetting herself]

  7. 7
    Herman Van Rompuy says:

    Damn! Another one has cottoned on to our EU super state plan, call Dave up and get them to snoop on his e-mail and tap his phone!

  8. 8
    AC1 says:

    BBC live footage seem to be trying to get Camoron killed in traffic at the moment.

  9. 9
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Lets tax the internet.

  10. 10
    X+2Y-3Z=NO IDEA says:

    The problem with Labour is that they only ever look at one side of the equation

    For every pound in benefit paid or pound of public sector wages, there must be a surplus generated by a private sector worker.

  11. 11
    Aunty Matter says:

    Nevermind Guido fucking gram how about sorting out this mess of a site?

    Back to Leveson

    BBC – Toenails says Cameron looked shifty and uncomfortable

    Sky- Cameron brushed off most of what Jay asked.

    My view from what I saw is Robinson was on a different planet.

    I seem to remember Toenails didn’t call Brown or Bliar ‘shifty’, but then again Robinson takes his orders direct from Labour HQ

  12. 12
    Aunty Matter says:

    What also made me laugh was when Toenails spouted crap and stated that Hunt was appointed after a ‘brief’ telephone call for legal advice.

    Anyone who listened to Leveson today knows Toenails was talking bollocks, the solicitor was part of a chain of the most senior civil servants who gave an opinion at the time based on what they were told.

    They then backed that up later on.

    How the fuck can toenails even call himself a journalist when he spins Labour shit?

  13. 13
    UKIP.I.AM says:

    Bloodbath? It’s been more like watching someone watch paint dry.

    No smoking gun. Not even a wobbly carrot. Just another brilliant example of the waste of taxpayer’s money by the public sector.

    A good time to bury bad news on Europe though.

  14. 14
    The BBC .....Cameron IS guilty says:

    Of course the previous PM insisted on police outriders to stop traffic and to clear route but HE was Labour after al

  15. 15
    Call me Chillax says:

    I prefer a country supper

  16. 16
    Toenails spins the truth(again) says:

    He also said that Samantha phoned Dave during lunch recess about his recollection of texting and meeting Rebekah but was happy when he told her ” I did NOT have an inappropriate relationship with her It was only politics, Darling !!!

  17. 17
    Louise Mensch says:

    Country lunch anyone ?

  18. 18
    Michael Winner says:

    Calm down dear!

  19. 19
    8i11y 8owd3n's mum says:

    Time for tea 81lly!

  20. 20
    Airey Belvoir says:

    I’ve just had an email from that nice Mr Carswell thanking me for voting on his Private Members’ Bill on this website – it will be on getting out of the EU, so will go nowhere sadly. It had Guido’s blog address on it – St Kitts and Nevis, FFS! No wonder he is relaxed about getting sued..

  21. 21
    Herman Van Rompuy says:

    … just think I would’ve gotten away with it if it hadn’t been for those meddling kids.

  22. 22
    Half a gram says:

    Oh yes ;)

  23. 23
    Bought and paid for says:

    Toenails is, has been, and always will be a Labour shill.

  24. 24
    UKIP.I.AM says:

    Thank you very much to everyone who voted on Guido’s website to help decide which Bill I should present to Parliament.

    The clear winner – a Bill to withdraw from the European Union – will be formally presented in the Commons this coming Wednesday. I will then publish the formal Bill, so that even if the Bill makes no further progress at this time, no MP can pretend quitting the EU is somehow not possible!

    Politics is too important to be left to politicians. Thanks to Guido and his co-conspirators, we have shown that the priorities of those in SW1 can be set directly by the people they clam to represent.

  25. 25
    Lord Mandelbum of Shirtlifting says:

    I prefer a country bumkin.

  26. 26
    And Here's To You, Mr. Robinson says:

    “I am just a poor boy, though my story’s seldom told,
    I have squandered my resistance
    For a pocketful of mumbles,
    Such are promises–all lies and jest,
    Still, a man hears what he wants to hear
    And disregards the rest…”

  27. 27
    The BBC balanced reporting as mormal says:

    I must congratulate the BBC on their obvious unbiased comments on Cameron’s appearnce before Leveson….fully backed up at lunch time by apparently “independent commentators” …at lunch time Brown’s ex-SpAd and member of Labour Party whilst just now they have just had Labour supporter Kevin Maguire…once again the usual standrads of impartiality have been exhibited by the Corporation

  28. 28
    Owain Glyndwr says:

    From what i gather leveson who is working well above paygrade fiendish plan is to introduce a bill through the HoC to regulate the media. All well and good, but this must cover the bbc and action could be taken against them for 24/7 bias they spew out

  29. 29
    8i11y 8owd3n's bum chum says:

    time for a nibble

  30. 30
    andrew marr says:

    no comment

  31. 31
    Lord Stansted says:

    The time has come to remove the BBC’s outdated monopoly by scrapping its licence fee. Sign the petition and show the beeboid bastards who pays their wages.


  32. 32
    Gonk says:

    Strange that Maguire bloke is normally unbiased and so sensible and reasonable. I think I’ll now go and shout at traffic before setting my head on fire. Wibble

  33. 33
    Dennis Cantcount says:


    I am Gordon Brown’s maths teacher

  34. 34
    Anonymous says:

    Embarrassing for Cameron at Leveson today. John Major can recall discussions with Murdoch from years ago but Dave had a string of ‘I can’t remember’s re discussions with Murdoch and his papers. (Much like Hunt).

    Then the background staff at Leveson laughed at Cameron after his ‘evidence’ on the BBC and Ofcom.

    Later Cameron avoided answering about the occasion Lord O’Donnel questioned him about Hunt’s impartiality before giving him legal advice on whether to appoint Hunt.

    Cameron, like Brooks, seems willing for non answers to be interpreted as a sign of guilt. At least I hope that was his interpretation, the alternative being that Cameron is too lacking in wit to realise this.

    Cameron came out of it all smelling of dung.

    Dave mate, you’re really going to have to up your game if lots of Conservatives aren’t going to lose their marginally won seats. I don’t think you can but I hope you prove me wrong. Best wishes anyway.

  35. 35

    Or even:

         b ± √-b² -4ac
    x =  ―――――――――――――
  36. 36
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    James Cagney, as Franklin Roosevelt (though I doubt the real one was much of a dancer, he had had polio, FFS!), on the subject of “Lobby Terms”:

  37. 37
    zzzzz says:

    Someone has already posted that. It was boring the first time.

  38. 38

    If I received a Guidogram I’d be tempted to mod it to get my own back on Mr F a wkes’ feckin’ useless automod.

  39. 39

    Guinness, a small Strongbows and two toads please, Yvonne.

  40. 40
    Brahmagupta says:
         -b ± √b²-4ac
    x =  ―――――――――――――
  41. 41
    Alec o'Mesbytheyard says:

    Great name for a new cocktail : the Two Toad Sloth.

  42. 42
    Postman Pat's cat says:

    oa = ur in Welsh, or so I am told.

  43. 43
    Postman Pat's cat says:

    Nosnibor hasn’t had an original thought since 1982 (when he had to think about what to have for breakfast).

  44. 44
    expat cat (who also does not pay the BBC tax) says:

    Out here in the foreign styx it was almost impossible to follow what was happening as the obnoxious and self-important BBC presenters kept interrupting the proceedings to relate to us (in their completely unbased fashion of course) what we had all just been witnessing. In the end I gave up. That awful Grimley woman needs a squib up her whatsits, followed rapidly by a P45.

  45. 45
    Home home on the range says:

    Is this the new U for a ploughman’s?

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