May 6th, 2012

Jeremy Clarkson on Tom Watson


384 Comments

  1. 1
    Reader says:

    Tom Watson is Labours Nadine Dorries ! Toxic!

    BTW Sunday Star not that good this week Guido, apart from Balls story.

    Like

    • 4
      The Brooks' Butler says:

      He’s only repeating what Dave and Rebekah said over dinner.

      Like

      • 15
        Gooey Blob says:

        Clarkson has a point. Watson is almost as loathsome as Ed Balls. Like the deluded shadow chancellor, the greater the time he spends on our screens, the more votes Labour lose.

        Watson always reminds me of that spotty Harry Enfield creation, Tory Boy.

        Like

        • 248
          chris owen says:

          “Clarkson has a point. Watson is almost as loathsome as Ed Balls. ”
          Thats not a point! Thats a piece of abuse!

          Like

          • jgm2 says:

            Thats a piece of abuse!

            Ahhh. But which one of the two is being abused?

            Like

          • Rage Against the Political Elite says:

            Clarkson should keep his mouth shut about people looks. People in Gigantic glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.

            Also Watson did help to expose the POLICE=MEDIA=STATE. apparatus so he should get at least a couple of gold stars for that. I bet they wished he had been introduced to the KELLY treatment, but No one would have worked out how bad it was going to get for the ruling Puppet masters.

            Like

        • 374
          Rupert's Mum says:

          Clarkson is a very old man now.

          Is he still driving?
          Is that safe?

          Like

      • 33
        if it's walks like a terrorist, talks like a terrorist and looks like a terrorist etc says:

        It’s getting worrying when the only man who is talking any commonsense is Jeremy Clarkson ffs.

        Like

        • 73
          Anonymous says:

          Clarkson, as usual, speaks for me – he should be in politics.

          Like

          • Anonymous says:

            I agree, and to the pratt who said watson exposed POLICE-MEDIA-STATE. What are you on ? Everyhting watson has done is to raise his own profile and damage a lot of other people. Vile man.

            Like

        • 82
          Anonymous says:

          He ususally speaks for me as well, he should be in politics.

          Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            He normally speaks for me as well, but he is too pro-European for my liking.

            Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            He normally speaks for me as well, but he is too pro-Europe@n for my liking. (Stepped on the bloody P-Mine again.)

            Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            Try AGAIN!!! He normally spe@ks for me as well, but he is too pro-Europe@n for my liking. (Stepped on the bloody P-Mine yet again.)

            Guido, this modding is taking the p. The seed of the fruit that comes in the form of a green pod is NOT racist!!!

            Like

      • 40
        Anonymous says:

        The Sun switched to the Tories, get over it Labour bitch.

        Like

        • 63
          Gooey Blob says:

          The Sun chooses the side that is most likely to win. With Balls determining economic policy, that is very unlikely to be Labour, regardless of how badly the coalition performs.

          Watson is also a turn-off for voters.

          Like

          • Anonymous says:

            Which of course makes good business sense, something socialists don’t quite get the hang of. They seem to have got the idea that Murdoch should have carried on supporting them even though they were shite.

            Like

          • screw the lot of them says:

            They are all shite.

            Like

          • Anonymous says:

            I agree, the Labour party are presenting themselves like mad people. Did you hear Hattie on PM on friday ? she sounded seriously deranged.

            Like

    • 5
      gorgeous George says:

      Clarkson / Fawkes – two cheeks of the same backside.

      Like

      • 7
        Rupert says:

        get yer tits out Fawkes!

        Like

        • 8
          Dick Hammond says:

          Clarkson, do that routine again where you use your ‘darling wife’ and her connection with VC heroism and copious mentions of ‘Help for Heroes’ to gain you massive support from imbecilic Brits and then shag behind ‘darling wife”s back, you talentless, gargoyle-faced piece of shit.

          Like

          • wally says:

            With both a christian name that could suggest idiot and a second name that has a strong reputation in the organ world I must assume you speak from experience.

            Like

          • wally says:

            May 6, 2012 at 6:38 pm

            With both a christian name that could suggest idiot and a second name that has a strong reputation in the organ world I must assume you spe@k from experience.

            Like

          • dick dastardly says:

            Ooh ‘ark at ‘er.

            Like

          • Mars Attacks says:

            Oh dear, the Liebore and Ukrap trolls are hiding under the bridge again!

            Matron, the w.ankers need their bromide and boxing gloves again, they’re starting to foam at the flies.

            Like

          • AC1 says:

            Will Tom “Brighton” Watson still be blaming hacking for his “marriage” breakup?

            Like

          • Mudd says:

            Are you not confusing wife with ex-wife, o clueless one?

            Like

        • 94

          I look forward to this. Guido is one BUSTY motherfuckin’ coked-up badger.

          Like

      • 134
        anonymous says:

        buttocks!!

        Like

    • 6
      The Brooks' Butler says:

      He’s only re p ting what Dave and Sarah said over dinner.

      Did you know a p nut is not a nut and is actually a p?

      Like

      • 28

        I know that peanuts figured in the first-ever successful attempt attempt by a Labour government to hosepipe UK taxpayers’ money down the sewer. Pea nuts require 20″ of rain a year – the area of Tanganyika. now Tanzania, chosen for the scheme, was subject to drought. CMD, Boris’ coffee boy,and 2nd PM in our history never to win a General Election, is carrying on in the same tradition as Atlee, Wilson. Blair. Gordon and other “progressive” leaders of our scepter’d isle.

        Like

      • 34
        archbishops gardener says:

        You slipped that in very cashewly

        Like

        • 50
          Actress (talented to ArchBishop level) says:

          It may only be little dear, – but I can certainly feel it.

          Like

    • 96
      Sir William Waad says:

      Jeremy Clarkson is a boor.

      Like

    • 117
      Fuct says:

      Wait until you see the Clocksun pictures. When you’ve poked out your mind’s eye with a fork you will understand the significance of that clip.

      Until then, be Prole.

      Like

    • 297
  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Watson>Clarkson

    Like

    • 18
      Gooey Blob says:

      This is why Labour always wrecks the country’s finances, they simply cannot add up.

      Everyone knows Clarkson > Watson. In fact, Clarkson > 100 * ( Watson + Balls )

      Like

      • 154
        Fuct says:

        Clarkson PICS = £ x LOTS ≡ DACRE PICS = MORE …..

        Just wait .. Mexican stand off.

        Like

  3. 3
    Rupert my Hero says:

    the truth will out

    Like

  4. 9
    anonymous says:

    Jeremy Clarkson on David Cameron – he’s a wanker and a spoilt etonian toff

    Like

  5. 10
    annette curton says:

    *** Breaking News***
    Fat c*nt calls fat c*nt a fat c+nt.

    Like

  6. 11
    Hows' Mi Spelin? says:

    More Joyful News Brought To You By The BBC:

    The National Association of Head Teachers say they will disrupt a new spelling, grammar and punctuation test to be introduced in England’s primary schools next summer.

    Their conference voted almost unanimously (98.8%) to find ways of stopping the test going ahead.

    Like

    • 14
      Please Sir says:

      FFS. They are paid to do a job, not dictate what the job consists of. No spelling test no pay simples.

      Like

    • 16
      Marmite says:

      They’ll do anything to aid the Labour party’s cause, as most are a bunch of left wing w*nkers, PLUS most te*chers are as thick as pig shyte.

      It gives you a warm glow inside to think how dedicated they are doesn’t it?

      Like

    • 21
      annette curton says:

      Disrupt it, wot wiv? 1,!@”…~£”’^^^%#&#$# :) (:

      Like

      • 30
        spelin matturs says:

        y dose theze kidz nede ay spelin teste wen uz teecherz kan teech themm ow toe spel properz?

        iff wee dunt ave thyme thun pillgrimms lyke Joolee Dayvis kan doo itt phor uz.

        Like

        • 119
          A maffs teecha says:

          cor! an aynt u cleva! oy just dun maffs – u dont not hav ter spel wiv maffs!

          Like

    • 23
      AC1 says:

      They thought they’d have to sit the test and they know they cant spel and get the gramer rite.

      There’s simply no time left after 7 hours a day of left-wing indoctrinating.

      Like

    • 32

      It’s quite simple. Head teachers refuse to be subjected to any measures designed to first measure,then improve the abject quality of attainment in English and Welsh schools.

      Like

      • 123
        A Head Teacher says:

        We’d be more than happy to test primary school children on what they’ve been taught about homosexual and lesbian sex, black culture, and the oppression of the people by rich capitalist scum.

        Like

        • 168
          Sir Aston Martin says:

          What? Are they taught nothing about our guilty past in the colonies? Shame on you, “School Leader”.

          P.S. Do you wear leaderhosen – geddit?

          Like

          • jgm2 says:

            He’s still pissed off because they wouldn’t refund him for his ‘voluntary’ ID card.

            Like

    • 351
      Archie says:

      Sack the fucking lot of the useless Huhnes!

      Like

    • 370
      Laugh? I nearly bought a low-energy light-bulb. says:

      There’s insufficient time in the timetable after they’ve been given their indoctrination about climate warming global change and the benefits of multi-culti.

      Like

    • 381
      Anonymous says:

      Is it true that Teachers, Drs, Firemen, Police, etc are all rabid Labour supporters, intent on bringing the government down or is it just their union leaders ?

      Like

  7. 12
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Not long now until a military coup in Greece. LOL

    Like

    • 13
      Jonny Spelman says:

      Wonder if Portugal and Spain will have one too.

      Like

      • 41
        hammock says:

        No coups in Greece Spain or Portugal in the next few months.
        Lots of sun means all entering siesta time.

        Like

        • 48
          Expat Geordie says:

          Normally happens in September-November when the weather turns cooler and the nights get longer.

          Like

          • jgm2 says:

            I know Greece, Spain and Portugal are further south than the UK but I don’t think they’re south of the equator so I expect their evenings get shorter (just like the UK) heading into September.

            Like

          • Anonymous says:

            @jm2

            I suppose that technically the evenings are shorter in Europe until the autumn equinox around 21st September, but they are at their shortest at the summer solstice in June.

            Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            jgm2. Not quite sure about your point here, which is unusual in one who normally writes such sense. I said nothing about evenings. Nights are at their shortest on June 21st in the UK and the Med. They then get longer. In the northern hemisphere planned coups tend to take place in autumn as nights are longer and you need the cover of night to get all aspects of the new regime in place for when the population wakes up in the morning.

            Like

          • jgm2 says:

            Ahhhh. I was thinking that the longer nights of September – November would discourage folk from taking to the streets in the dark. Popular uprisings (at least in the UK) are a summer phenomenon on account of the long balmy summer evenings. Although with the way May is shaping up we may have a bit of a wait for long, balmy summer evenings.

            Good luck to the Greek generals if they do take over.

            You would hope that the Greek generals would have more sense than to try and square the circle of mass public sector employment and fuck all tax revenue though. Or, if they do, it’ll look bad for the Greek public sector. Or anybody with any fixed assets. Not that the fixed assets will be worth anything if they’re confiscated.

            Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            And you’re also right there now that you’ve explained it. An “unplanned” coup piggy backing on a popular uprising could take place at any time but especially at the height of summer.

            The Chilean coup of 1973 took place on September 11th, the start of their spring as a result of the mob demanding that the army take action. (The left doesn’t mention that bit, women waving empty pots at soldiers, etc.)

            Like

    • 17
      SAM says:

      Looks like London is having one for the Olympics. With all that fire power around the venues I doubt the Argentinian team will try anything though.

      Like

      • 22
        Axe The Telly Tax says:

        Great opportunity to shoot down the Argies Olympic team plane and say they were trying to fly it into the Cenotaph or Buck Palace. ;-)

        Like

      • 26
        annette curton says:

        I heard they didn’t all make it back from Goose Green the second time around.

        Like

      • 39

        Watch out for torpedo trails during the rowing events.

        Like

        • 53
          UKIPMAN says:

          Breaking news. There’s trouble at Camden locks. Police are on the lookout for some Argy Bargee.

          Like

      • 62
        A spoiler story says:

        This argy bargy stuff is all to create a distraction [Spoiler stories] from the Rampant corruption withing our Parliament – Across the board of politics all 3 main political parties have been shown to be utterly corrupted and sleaze driven.

        Parliament is the worlds biggest circus – and the political hacks (including a dum Bolton) are the journalist Circus that promote the tripe of the pigs at the trough.

        Off with all of their heads.

        Like

        • 246
          Black Mask says:

          Beheading is a punishment historically granted to nobles for treason. Some of our leaders may have titles but noble they most certainly are not. Hanging, drawing and quartering is best for them.

          Like

          • jgm2 says:

            In the spirit of equanimity I propose that we ennoble those who have been found guilty of treason, in a fair trial naturally, (or as many retrials as necessary to get the ‘correct’ result) such as Blair, Brown, Mandelson, Straw, Campbell etc approx five minutes before we chop their fucking heads off.

            All: Amen

            All Rise.

            Like

          • Black Mask says:

            Unusually jgm2, you miss the point. They must all, titled and untitled, suffer drawing and quartering, and their agonies must take place in a public place with crowds milling around, the Ladies and Gentlemen in their smartest attire, children gambolling around and chewing toffee apples.

            The bill for the execution should afterwards be sent to their families.

            Like

          • jgm2 says:

            I was allowing my tender side to show there. Naturally I would prefer if they were hoisted by a big crane in a giant daisy chain, each one suspended from the legs of the next.

            Ideally the crane should be perched on top of the Gherkin or the Shard so that the whole of London need only step out into their garden to see that justice has been done.

            I still think my more merciful side is showing there.

            Like

          • Black Mask says:

            I like that. A funfair atmosphere and a mass viewing opportunity.

            Like

          • There'll always be an Ingerland says:

            Hang about chaps, I need to find my other knitting needle.

            Like

    • 52
      grobdj says:

      A Coup de Grèce for the Euro maybe?

      Like

      • 191
        The EU project Zombie says:

        The Euro is a dead duck – it’s just the Marxist nutters like van rumpy, Merkel et all who – are “In denial” of it. Their “Dream” [Bit like that American dream!!! A dupe upon the "UN"informed] – is just the nightmare for the good people who haven’t been duped into the political balloon cum circus performers of self-importance (Or should that be impotence?) by them nasty Banksters from the ECB & IMFuckwits – who answer to them other hidden at arms length WrathSchilds with their busted dupe of usury … allegedly.

        Let’s be having you, you Ken(zombie)SchEUsters…

        Like

  8. 19
    Anonymous says:

    Most unusual to see anti-Labour sentiments on HIGNFY!!!

    Like

  9. 20
    Referee says:

    Clarkson used the same”waste of blood and organs” jibe about Jade Goody shortly before she died.

    How valuable is your motormouth then, Jeremy?

    Like

  10. 27
    Penny Red says:

    Like

  11. 37
    B!lly Bunter says:

    I said it about Gove, but it applies to you, too, “Jizz”-a:

    (Back when I was going for the Drew Carey look.)

    Like

    • 42
      Anonymous says:

      What a waste of blood and organs!

      Like

    • 43
      Marmite says:

      Thanks a lot Mr Bunter. I’ve just b*ggered my keyboard up with a tomato sarnie looking at that fat shyte. You should have put a warning up before the clip. I shall send you the repair bill sir. :)

      Like

    • 46
      Jeremy Clarkson says:

      Tom Watson should be taken out and shot in front of his family.

      Like

      • 65
        On my Oath Tony Blair says:

        I Tony Blair should be taken out and shot in front of my family – because of the lies I told [Iraq, Egypt, etc] and continue to tell – because I only wanted to line my pockets with blood money.

        I’m a lawyer Barrister yeu know – I can lie with impunity – ‘cos I made monkeys of you all – well …. me an my corporate american mates actually – this God thing pays better than I’d thought actually.

        Like

        • 116
          Hang 'em High - REALLY High (own piano wire supplied) says:

          Over far too quick, – no spectacle! No drama!

          Tone likes a bita drama!

          Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            Broken on a wheel? Takes about 12 hours and stings a fair bit.

            Like

          • On my Oath Tony Blair says:

            Look … I mean, I think, I beleieve that I shouldn’t really have gotten away with that Importuning episode / arrest when I was looking like a girlie befor I met cherry delta … but them nice MET pigs let me orf with it – yes OK Rupee somehow obtained the inside info and well err maybe I was a bit entrapped thereafter but what harm, injury or loss have I inflicted upon anyone in the world since then? Come on guy’s hey …I’m just a straight kinda talkin… honest … really… on my Oath.

            Like

      • 161
        Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

        Here’s the scoop:

        Watson is partial to an away day to Brighton.

        He thinks that all this noise and publishing a book is cover for when the story finally comes out.

        Fatty will call it a ‘Murdoch smear’.

        I’ll call it the reason his ‘wife’ left.

        Like

        • 172
          Sir Aston Martin says:

          Do keep up, m’lud, that’s ancient news.

          Like

        • 181
          jgm2 says:

          What? Watson is a gay-er?

          I don’t believe it.

          Like

          • Boudicca says:

            I don’ t give a shit if he’s gay or straight. The fact that he’s an aggressive c**t who tries to stifle a free press and legitimate debate is enough to make me despise him.

            Like

          • jgm2 says:

            Watson was all for a ‘free press’ when it was re-printing Mandelson and Campbell’s press briefings verbatim.

            What happened?

            Like

          • pink news says:

            Probably why no one dare touch him, politically speaking and otherwise. Gays are the new untouchables.

            Like

          • pink news says:

            Probably why no one dare touch him, politically and otherwise. Gays are the new untouchables.

            Like

        • 235
          blighton and heave says:

          after all the beach is full of large sun bleached groynes.

          Like

    • 80
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      Watson pissed again.

      Like

    • 227
      AC1 says:

      Is it a requirement of being a Labour MP to have a badly fitted suit jacket?

      Like

    • 252
      Black Mask says:

      This must have been after Fatty’s wife had confiscated his playstation from him.

      Like

  12. 45
    Jimmy says:

    Watson attacked by Murdoch employee?

    A guidoesque display of loyalty there.

    Like

  13. 57
    Twat's ont'elly? says:

    Good Evening – here is the BBC anytime News!

    Our Glorious Hero, Gordon Brown, made a speech today praising the BBC for its unsurpassed reporting!

    In other news, The Drought Caused by Global Warming continues. Stand pipes are being set up in Glasgow, London, Bermingum and other centres of Islum.

    Like

    • 66
      Fools gold says:

      OT SARKYS gone then, shame i like Carla

      Like

    • 76
      The Angel of Dearth says:

      The standpipes interest me; how will we be expected to get to them? By wading, or will Dave issue us with dinghys?

      Like

      • 106
        The BBC says:

        The standpipes interest me; how will we be expected to get to them? By wading, or will Dave issue us with dinghys?

        Briefly:

        The BBC will run on-line courses for Stand Pipe use
        Instructional videos will be unctuously shown in Town Halls
        Apps will be available for all those stupid enough to have smart phones and I-thingys etc.,
        Leaflets, DVDs, and other material will put through every door. (they are already in production)

        You will be allocated to an Education Centre for Instructional Courses on
        - Global Warning
        - Drought, Flood
        - Wind farms
        - use of Scarce Resources
        - ‘What the EUSSR is doing for YOU’ and
        - Health And Safety Ishoos.
        - Recognition of Stand Pipe
        - What to do with a Stand Pipe
        - How to swim / wade / paddle / to Stand Pipe
        - Special precautions in ice / fog /snow / hail / and what to do if floods cover the Stand Pipe
        - ATTENDANCE IS MANDATORY AND YOU WILL BE CHARGED

        An Open University Course on The Bleeding Obvious is in preparation

        Once again, – more proof of why your Telly Tax is worth it, why QUANGOs are worf it, and how generally wonderful we are.

        That is all! NOW PAY YOUR TELLY TAX ! (unless you’re one of us and receiving special supplies by tanker)

        Like

        • 177
          Sir Aston Martin says:

          >Leaflets, DVDs, and other material will put through every door.

          Available in 174 different languages, plus Braille, Morse Code, runes and Egyptian hieroglyphics?

          Like

          • Be afraid be very afraid ... says:

            And if all else fails – we’ll send around a couple of “enforcement officers” from the Local Commie council [They're being trained in Bournemouth at present] and ENFORCE you to become stand pipe compliant. [Cited: EU directive: bull5hit]

            Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            Where in Bournemouth? The CCTV in The Square and at the Clown Hall doesn’t work properly. Experience in Ulster shows that selective assasination works wonders. Why do you think that the Provos agreed to “peace”?

            Like

          • Expat Geordie says:

            Where in Bournemouth? The CCTV in The Square and at the Clown Hall doesn’t work properly. Experience in Ulster shows that selective assasination works wonders. Why do you think that the Provos agreed to “pe@ce”?

            Like

  14. 58
    More Joyful News Brought To You By The BBC: says:

    Socialist Francois Hollande wins French presidency (according to projections based on partial results).

    Like

    • 160
      Jimmy says:

      Like

    • 373
      JH says:

      If this all ends up with a big tiff between Germany and the Frogs, can we just stay out of it this time please? If did us fuck all good getting involved the last two times.

      Ideally we’ll be sat on the sidelines making a fat load of cash from both sides.

      Like

  15. 60
    Anonymous says:

    I’ve always thought it odd that Clarkson’s the only right wing ‘comedian’ that appears on the Beeb. Something to do with ratings, I suppose.

    Like

    • 130
      Anonymous says:

      There are a shit load of leftie ‘comedians’ on the TV and Radio 4 taking the piss out of what they imagine are right wing politicians ( haha, this fucking lefty government) and Daily Mail readers, but when one, just one Jeremy Clarkson has a go, they just can’t fucking take it, poor lambs.

      Like

    • 207
      Expat Geordie says:

      I thought that Miles Jupp was meant to be a “right-wing comedian”. Althought that could just be a front.

      Like

      • 225
        Anonymous says:

        Well, that could be one. Anymore to speak of? Jim Davidson doesn’t count, he’s persona non grata with the BBC and has been for decades, and ITV come to that. Besides I think he lives in Dubai now.

        Like

  16. 71
    Frau Merkel says:

    France will do what we tell her to do. As always.

    Like

  17. 75
    Les Curses says:

    Somebody should have warned Sarko that Gordon is a Jinx.

    Like

  18. 77
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    % wise the lefty win in France is about the same as Boris got, bet the BBC won’t wank on about how close it was and how it’s not a mandate for Hollande like they did over Boris winning.

    Like

  19. 78
    Mr 0a says:

    Tom Watson for Labour leader. Guido you need to start campaigning!

    Like

    • 92
      jgm2 says:

      Not at all. Vacant Ned is doing just fine.

      Like

      • 179
        Sir Aston Martin says:

        “Toxic Ned” would do just as equally as well as what the other one does. IMHO.

        Like

        • 228
          Change says:

          No, no, no he was annointed some days ago upon the shoulder with the order of egg & spoon not poached 3 minute hard boiled as – EGGed.

          Like

  20. 79
    Well it's a thought says:

    Seems Hollande is from a similar class as Camoron, a rich lefty, wonder how much whitewash Liebour will use to get that one across.

    Like

    • 81
      UKIPMAN says:

      Good to see the back of that little tw@, Sarkozy. And RIP France after the socialists have put plan B into action.

      Like

      • 180
        Sir Aston Martin says:

        Hollande’s bint looks a bit of all right. What is it with these French birds? Why are English birds (Lady Martin excluded, natürlich) so fucking ugly? And why are they so up themselves?

        Like

    • 194
      John Bull says:

      Great news for the chum chaps.

      Froggies, flushed with funny money, will be hot to buy stuff from Blighty.

      So all we need to do is make gear and flog it, simples !

      Like

      • 358
        Haribo Halfwit says:

        A rather surprising clutch of properties are on the market in London in the two-to-three million pound bracket. Hard to tell which of the embattled European economic refugees are snapping them up now that France’s super rich are in Hollande’s sights.

        As seen elsewhere, if Merkel and Sarkozy made Merkozy, do Merkel and Hollande make Merde?

        Like

  21. 84
    nellnewman says:

    I don’t think I’ve ever agreed with jeremyclarkson before.

    Like

  22. 89
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Francois Hollande sings:

    As I walk a long the Bois Boolong with an independent air,
    you can hear the peasants declare,
    He must be a millionaire,
    You can hear them sigh and wish to die,
    You can see the socialists wink the other eye
    At the man who will break the bank at the 5th Republic.

    Like

  23. 93
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Francois Hollande sings

    As I walk a long the Bois Boolong with an independent air,
    you can hear the pe@sants declare,
    He must be a millionaire,
    You can hear them sigh and wish to die,
    You can see the socialists wink the other eye
    At the man who’ll break the bank at 5th Republic.

    Like

  24. 105
    BBC tweeter says:

    Just listened to Hollande and come in my pants.

    Like

    • 114
      Gordon Brown says:

      That reminds me . . . NURSE!!!! – there’s a lot of brown sticky stuff in my bed and it smells nice!

      Like

  25. 107
    Dimbleby, the BBC cat says:

    I’m bewildered – the BBC humans are giving me treats again? What can have happened? Why are they calling me a ” joli chat-chat”?

    Like

  26. 110
    Fuct says:

    Wait until you see the Clocksun pictures. When you’ve poked out your mind’s eye with a fork you will understand the significance of that clip. Until then, be Prole.

    Like

  27. 121
    No More Kozy says:

    A pissing little election in frogland will not thwart our plans for the Fourth R e i c h.

    Like

  28. 125
    Quisling says:

    Jeremy Clarkson on Tom Watson

    Is that like a girl on girl movie but for a more select audience?

    Like

  29. 126
    Well it's a thought says:

    Well at least one thing we will get proof about the two ed’s idea’s over pissing money we don’t have up the wall, Hollande is going to prove it works or NOT.

    Like

    • 129
      Quisling says:

      And don’t forget Greece. The Golden Dawn party (radical right) are back in the parliament and they have such policies as placing land mines along the Turkish border to prevent illegal immigration !!

      Like

    • 142
      jgm2 says:

      Anybody with an IQ higher than Jade Goody knows that pi*ss*ing away money you don’t have to buy the illusion of prosperity is madness. The last 13 years of Imbecility proved that to even the most hard-of-thinking.

      Like

  30. 127
    Ken says:

    I’d love to spend more time on here but I’m off to a taxpayer funded libation

    Like

  31. 131
    Theresa May says:

    May the 28th be with you

    Like

  32. 132
    anonymous says:

    when are the british going to tell arrogant stinky pooh git cameron to fuck off like the french have to the little frog sarkozy

    Like

  33. 137
    Well it's a thought says:

    Just waiting to hear about Greece, Sopal seems to be having wet dreams that a socialist is President of France this first time in 25years, must be getting closer to making sure I get loads of popcorn in.

    Like

  34. 145
    Bob Crow says:

    viVa cOMrayde HollAndayze saUCe! soSHellisM iZ bacK!

    Like

  35. 147
    'Allo 'Allo says:

    Beeg taxes and beeg state spending start next week.

    Like

    • 309
      It pays to think ahead says:

      Collapse of Euro soon after that. Coup in Greece, return of the drachma, cheap holidays on Naxos. Sorted.

      Like

  36. 148
    Black Cab says:

    Yep. About right.

    Like

  37. 152
    **** ***** says:

    It is funny to see all the tory boys expressing their angst about shithead watson as their fucking government is buggering the country without a murmur – now what does that say about these venal types?????

    Like

    • 155
      Returning officer says:

      Its also your government Heywood if you live in the UK

      (as in Heywood Jablome)

      Like

    • 156
      ???? ????? says:

      You would do better going to Labourlost or a Tory blog to ask about venal types, were just nasty to all.

      Like

    • 157
      no more boom we're busted says:

      Yeah the period when we were really screwed between 1997 and 2010 never happened right?

      Like

      • 158
        BBC says:

        Correctamundo

        Like

        • 162
          BBC - a clarification (dictated by Ed Balls) says:

          Quite so. All that reckless bank lending to muppets that inflated UK GDP and tax receipts by 80bnquid a year from 2001/2 onwards was nothing to do with Labour turning a blind eye and taking bank supervision away from the BoE. And it was entirely prudent while all this reckless personal borrowing and reckless bank lending was going on for the government to borrow another 35bn quid (on average) during these ‘boom’ years.

          Labour are in no way to blame for the uniquely fucked economic situation in which we find ourself and Liam Byrne was only joking when he said ‘There’s no money left’.

          Like

  38. 163
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Has Livingstone declared his full and true financial accounts yet?
    Has Miliband declared who was at the Rudd event?
    Why doesn’t Watson have the guts to tell the truth of why he is attacking the Murdochs?

    Like

    • 197
      Are you making this up in hope that there is something there ? says:

      Why dont you tell us ?

      Like

    • 198
      Terrytory says:

      I need some help – could some Guidoista explain to me what the RUDD event was?

      I’m only a country boy, you know.

      Like

      • 222
        Expat Geordie says:

        When I was a kid the RUDD Cup was the County Durham primary schools version of the FA Cup. The winners got to play Liverpool Boys.

        Kevin RUDD used to be Australian PM.

        Other than that, I haven’t a RUDDy clue.

        Like

  39. 167
    Gloone says:

    But Guido… last week you thought that public insults were a criminal offence?? What happened to change your mind so radically?

    Like

  40. 169
    Heywood Jablome says:

    It’s all in the name

    Like

  41. 182
    smoggie says:

    Tom Watson is a two-eyed English idiot.

    Like

  42. 186
    Tony Benn says:

    WE’RE BACK! VIVA LA FRANCE!

    Like

  43. 188
    A Nemo says:

    All EuroStar Services have seen a dramatic increase in Reservations going forward for the next 6 months as of 7pm BST tonight from Gard Du Nord to St Pancras……………..interesting…..

    Like

    • 199
      Well it's a thought says:

      The French with money are bailing out just in case somebody steals it.

      Like

    • 215
      AC1 says:

      Crystal Ball…

      B&N&P Paribas announces it’s moving it’s main offices from Paris to Marylebone.

      Whover’s building all those new buildings in London, must’ve known there’d be a load of french banks looking to relocate.

      Like

    • 218
      grobdj says:

      Allons y en Sangatte

      Like

  44. 192
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    You have to love the BBC, 10pm news

    “Hollonde wins by a clear majority”

    Yet Boris only just scraped home according to the same BBC even though both got roughly the same % vote

    Note Sky News said Hollonde’s win was narrow.

    Clearly all that Champers the BBC didn’t use in 2010 was drunk tonight

    Like

  45. 202
    Terrytory says:

    ITV news at Ten…

    Pictures of Socilaist rally in Paris, with some goon waving an Irish tricolour!

    WTF?

    Like

    • 229
      Expat Geordie says:

      Not as bad as those idiots who wave euro rags at the Last Night of the Proms. German flags I can understand as the Hun seem to go mental over it (Last Night parties, etc.) but euro rags – it goes against everything that it means to be British.

      Other than that, are you sure that the colour hasn’t gone on your telly?

      Like

    • 234
      Step on the Accelerator says:

      Fuck all the sheep!
      Let them live in their fucked up Euro la la land of fans and shit, for soon enough we’ll be seeing guillotines in the streets of Paris.

      Like

  46. 205
    Well it's a thought says:

    Good job it’s France , socialists reported be drinking champagne, maybe they have already decided to spend and spend their way out of debt.

    Like

  47. 206
    Happy second Birthday Dave. says:

    PM Dave is 2 years old today.

    Like

  48. 210
    Anon says:

    Following Sarkozy’s defeat tonight Frau Merkel has issued a directive for CMD to report to her in BONN without delay……for new orders……

    Like

    • 260
      Expat Geordie says:

      You know, when I see him called CMD, I keep thinking he’s called CND. Then I realise that there is no difference.

      Like

      • 281
        Anon says:

        CND had a well defined useful political purpose as opposed to CMD,the One Term PM,who is the Tory Toff Liar!! & has no real purpose; Which as a result will allow Milliepeed The Minor to get his hands back on the Levers of Power & complete ZanuLieLabours Master Plan the Total Destruction of the UK swiftly followed by the
        total complete domination by the EU……..Unless of course the UK great unwashed decides no and Lines all of the Traitors up against the Wall & lets them have it !!!
        That includes all of Blue Labour, Red Labour plus the Bonkers LibDems. That will be the start of taking OUR country back from them

        Like

        • 295
          Expat Geordie says:

          Funny, I thought that CND were just a bunch of ugly, misinformed lesbians with an aversion to soap and a propensity to being infiltrated by the KGB.

          Like

          • ZanuLieLabour says:

            Why let the truth get in way ?? it never troubled us during our glorious 13 years rule when we abolished Boom & Bust guided by our supreme leader the world statesman our worshipped President Gordon Brown who saved the Universe & Beyond……

            Like

      • 347
        anonymous says:

        CMD – Cadbury’s Mary Dilk

        Like

  49. 217
    A Party Political Broadcast on behave of the Wavy Davey Bumsex Army says:

    Like

    • 247
      Wavy Davey says:

      I don’t support bumsex marriage in spite of being a conservative, I support bumsex marriage BECAUSE I’m a conservative!

      Like

  50. 220
    Anon says:

    The Biased Broadcasting Company aka BBC Having multi-orgasim’s tonight at Sarkozy’s defeat whilst they quaff Magnums of Champers charged of course to Licence Payers account…….The Mugs that pay for all of there Biased Broadcasting….

    Like

    • 226
      The Market says:

      You can run away from reality but you can’t run away from the consequences of running away from reality.

      Like

      • 241
        They shot me says:

        Remember – Abraham Lincoln said “You can fool some of the people for some of the time, but you can’t fool all of the people for all of the time”.

        Like

        • 271
          Some Geezer wot thinks Lincoln's argument has "legs" says:

          Honest Abe also said, “So let’s say we call a dog’s tail a ‘leg,’ now how many legs has the dog got? He still has four– calling a tail a ‘leg’ won’t make it one.”

          Like

          • AC1 says:

            Good quote, because they’ve been calling increases in debt “growth” for a long time now…

            And just because you call debt “growth”, doesn’t make it growth.

            Like

          • Gordon B. says:

            I called wasteful spending ‘Investment’ – and guess what? – Dave and most of his morons swallowed it!!!!!

            Like

      • 245
        Anonymous says:

        Thing is, they will just blame the ‘markets’ when things go tits up, so you really can’t win with socialists, they’re determined to fail as they have proved time and again.

        Like

  51. 240
    Nicolas Sarkozy says:

    C’est la vie!

    Like

  52. 242
    It's funny because it's true says:

    Like

  53. 243
    THE DICTATOR says:

    Like

  54. 244
    UKIPMAN says:

    With Hollande France have said they have voted for change. They are now going to borrow more and spend more.

    Plus ça change (plus c’est la même chose).

    Like

  55. 262
  56. 263
    Maternity Unit says:

    Soon the EU will adopt China’s policy of 1 child but with a twist. It will be 0 children as there literally will be no money left for any future generation.

    Lets all party as there is no tomorrow

    Like

    • 323
      Kne and the Bacon of Islum says:

      Pe@ce be upon da bruvvas, – but the Islum population is growing and growing.

      So Londistan is not just a dream – bring on the Kalyfat!

      Like

  57. 264
    BBC NEWS says:

    We can report from France and our Broadcasting House the outbreak of multiple orgasm in a wankfest of socialist comradeship amongst the bottles of Champagne that little the corridors. Also the hourly rate of rent boys has shot through the roof as has the price for Columbian marching powder.

    Vive la France!

    Like

  58. 265
    Pie splash. says:

    Can you please lay off Twatson? The last thing we need is for him to jump off Westminster bridge and create a Tsunami over Londonistan.

    On second thoughts bring it on.

    Like

  59. 267
    Euro Firework says:

    Light the blue touch paper and stand well back!

    Like

  60. 269
    The Truth about Spelman's 17 inches says:

    London has Not seen a reduction in rainfall. It has seen a reduction in the rain collected then stored. And this is EU diktat.

    http://wattsupwiththat.com/2012/05/05/more-on-the-wettest-april-in-100-years-in-the-uk/

    Like

    • 275
      Herman Achille Van Rompuy President of Europe says:

      It is our policy to blame any shortcomings in our “Leadership” of the European people on man made global warming and to approve all solutions that tax CO2 emissions.

      It is so simple and easy to do this. With many thanks to the BBC, Al Gore and the UEA.

      Like

    • 279
      Herman Achille Van Rompuy President of Europe says:

      It is our policy to blame any shortcomings in our “Leadership” of the Europe@n people on man made global warming and to approve all solutions that tax CO2 emissions.

      It is so simple and easy to do this. With many thanks to the BBC, Al Gore and the UEA.

      (p e a free version)

      Like

    • 290
      Frank says:

      To be frank, I wouldn’t give Spelman my 5 inches let alone the 17 she wants.

      Like

      • 293
        Talk to Frank says:

        Can you get us some gear please we are having a riot here tonight? Send it to …

        BBC Centre,
        201 Wood Ln,
        Shepherd’s Bush,
        London W12 0HL, UK

        Like

  61. 282
    Quisling says:

    mmm with the EU going to hell in a hand basket I wonder how long it will be now before someone goes to war against Iran?

    Nothing like a war to bring prosperity !

    Like

    • 294
      Barry O'Bummer says:

      Shhhhh!

      Like

      • 321
        Gordon Brown says:

        They told me that was his name – imagine my disappointment when a quick fondle in the kitchen was brushed aside!! I’ve never been quite the same since.

        Like

  62. 286
    Cast Iron Guarantee V2.0 says:

    Like

    • 289
      Justice Fingers says:

      Is he out on bail?

      Like

    • 311
      Angela Merkel says:

      Ich habe ein Geheimnis Lust an der englischen unabhängigen Mann namens Nigel und ich über seinen EU Kriegslust masterbate jeden Tag.

      Like

    • 314
      Totty's Dream says:

      Didn’t do too well in London though did you?

      Like

      • 332
        Wavy Davey says:

        That’s right brother, keep supporting bumsex marriage in spite of being a conservative!

        Like

    • 355
      You know it makes sense says:

      Well done Nigel.

      You have many more converts like me out there. We are the disenfranchised former loyal Tory voters, supporters, finaciers, doorstep knockers. You will gain support increasingly from the older generation too. You have the fastest and largest growing youth group.

      There is a very long way to go. What must be done is identify exactly what the message is in simple bullet point form and prepare for May 2013 County elections.

      Most of the Conservative controlled shires have not had any effective opposition for decades and although well established are unused to be held to account and challenged. Many have Councillors more than iffy, particularly with regard to planning – the last bastion of corruption.

      It’s an uphill battle but the time is right. It can be done.

      Like

  63. 296
    Barry O'Bummer and Hollande in da House says:

    Fuck austerity brothers and sisters, we don’t need to live within our means lets just spend spend spend kids! Our children and grand children can pay for our greed and short sighted selfishness!

    Vote for us, vote for CHANGE!

    Like

    • 299
      Retarded mainstream Media Brainwashed Sheeple says:

      ++CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP++

      Like

      • 322
        NHS Direct Spokes Person says:

        IF you have a bad dose of the CLAP you need to start treatment now by getting your Perscription for Anti-Biotics with further delay,
        Please Note This is Dispensed FREE of CHARGE in Scotland & Wales but not in England……..

        Like

        • 329
          NHS Direct SpookyPerson (not in Scotland) says:

          Todger all red and discharging? Sore? Swollen? Bit tender round the old orifice?

          Can’t get the full thrust? – tough mate, tough, – check the girl out next time!

          Like

    • 303
      Dave Cameroon says:

      Ill vote for that as long as there is something left to fund the Indian Space programme to put call centres on the moon. The electorate put me here on that mandate and I’m determined to see it through.
      As well as the right for every man to have a husband of course

      Like

      • 307
        Angela Merkel says:

        Alle Männer müssen husabands sein und genießen Sie das Geschlecht des bumhole unseren Euro bumsex Armee beizutreten.

        Like

    • 308
      The BBC and Windbag Kinnock says:

      Yes bring it on. We’re alright.

      Like

    • 313
      The Plantaginets says:

      As long as it brings about a collapse in French property prices and rise in sterling, you can get up to any nonsense you like.

      Like

  64. 298
    Aberdinnerjacket (an aliase) says:

    Be quick as I have some very very favourable deals now for buying Euro’s !
    You Pig’s need to take advantage while you can…….

    Like

    • 318
      The Tosser in No 10 says:

      Actually chaps, we have some money left over from Gordon – this sounds a dashed good deal to me, – watt? wattage?

      Shall we put our last savings in?

      Savings! – what am I saying! ha ha ahah ha hah a!

      I got mine from Daddy! – but I’m going to keep that safe. Let the common people pay . . . hah ha hah ahah!!! wattage!

      Like

      • 325
        Aberdinnerjacket (an aliase) says:

        Please be assured all my Exchange Deals have always been on the Level & are fully Kosher compliant……………..already my boy…….

        Like

  65. 301
    Angela Merkel says:

    Scheiße!

    Like

  66. 312
    A Beeb Shirt Lifter says:

    There is no truth in the rumour that the Corporation had to ship extra consignments of Petroleum Jelly tonight as the News Rooms in BBC White City, & the Media Centre in Salford celebrated Sarkozy’s defeat with huge daisy chains while quaffing Tax Payer Funded Champers !! Not forgetting the party now starting @ Bush House…….

    Like

    • 320
      John of Hull and Damnation says:

      Starter’s paste we called it in my day, – not that I was ever into bum sex, – me – up the skirt stuff in my day – like nature intenededded!

      Phwoooarrrh!!!!!! – there again, I’m a tit man meself!

      Like

      • 328
        A Beeb Shirt Lifter says:

        Your so 20th Century in your warped views, this is the 21st Century and its all so natural…….to slip it in this way……so take note you pervert !!

        Like

    • 336

      French socialist Francois Hollande has won a clear victory in the country’s presidential election and a humiliating defeat for Sarkozy
      {bbc 6 oclock news}

      Hollande 51.67%
      Sarkozy 48.33%

      Narrow win in a much closer than expected election for Boris Johnson.
      Boris 51.5%
      Ken 48.5%

      Like

  67. 319
  68. 326
    Feel the Enrichment in Luton says:

    Like

  69. 331
    The Foreign Secretary's Office says:

    We are able to confirm the party @ Bush House is proving to be a Gay Old Time as the Daisy Chain gets bigger as more & more friends from all walks arrive & join the circle to celebrate the Frogs Presidential Erections….!!

    Like

  70. 333
    Pop Chips says:

    Like

  71. 335
    albacore says:

    Oh dearie me and wot a surprise
    I bet you’ll hardly believe your eyes
    Head teachers just ain’t interested
    In having kiddies’ grammar tested
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-17974663

    Like

    • 360
      Too lod to have been dumbed down says:

      “Trust us to assess all our children’s writing this year and every year or we will not cooperate with any future tests.”

      Yes, we bloody did and look what a shining success that was. Hardly surprising, given the level of literacy enjoyed by your teaching staff themselves.

      Like

      • 361
        Too lod to have been dumbed down says:

        And too old to have been taught typing “skills”. Jesus H.

        Like

  72. 337
    Milliepeed the Newly Inflated Minor (One Prick & all Gone) says:

    Frau Merkel confirmed she has told,(invited) the new President of France to visit Berlin without delay. The tea boy aka CMD, will attend as instructed, to ask them a vital question in both German & French “One lump or two!!”

    Nice to see Tory Toffs still have influence in the corridors of EU Power…..

    Like

  73. 338
    D L George says:

    Interesting.
    The new Socialist president of France is from a town called “Tulle”, pronounced ‘Tool’.
    More than coincidence?

    Like

  74. 344
    UKIPMAN says:

    As the Euro tanks, Monsieur Hollande is having French toast for breakfast. How apt. Speaking of Euro tanks I am taking bets on how long will it be before German ones roll into Paris again?

    Like

  75. 345
    UKIPMAN says:

    As the Euro tanks, Monsieur Hollande is having French toast for brekkfast. How apt. Spracking of Euro tanks I am taking bets on how long will it be before German ones roll into Paris again?

    Like

  76. 349
    anonymous says:

    whenever anyone criticizes Cameron and his junta everyone goes all labourlist – even if the criticism is justified. This lot have been in government for 2 years now – do we let them practice a bit more then????

    Like

  77. 353
    The BBC celebrates the election of Hollande says:

    The BBC luvvies can barely contain their joy at France voting for a man who promises his country economic catastrophe and can’t wait for the UK to do the same. Vive les deux Eds !!!

    Like

    • 362
      jgm2 says:

      Thanks to the liberal arts education most of them have received they haven’t the economic or mathematical sense God gave plankton. They are however very receptive to anything from the realm of fiction which is why they simply love what Toxic Ned tells ‘em.

      The thick, ignorant c*unts. Dangerous too. Convinced that must be clever because they studied English or Classics at Oxford and that we should pay attention to their opinion on economic policy.

      Like

      • 371
        The Central Committee of the left-wing comedians intelligence union says:

        There is no greater sign of intelligence than an English person studying English at an English university, it is really pushing the intellectual frontiers.

        Like

  78. 354
    Anonymous says:

    Can you please stop being so nice to Watson.

    This is supposed be a right wing blog after all.

    To suggest that watson is almost as loathesome as balls is frankly being kind to watson.

    Like

    • 378
      Coiled Spring says:

      This is not only a ring wing blog, this is a right wing blog which is back in recession.

      Like

  79. 359
    Cressida's Dick says:

    Win win result all round in France. The arrogant dwarf Sarkozy gets his and the lunatic socialist is given a mandate to bankrupt the country.

    Like

    • 364
      jgm2 says:

      Pound up to 1.24 Euros now in anticipation of the printing presses firing up. Another year at this rate and we’ll be back approaching the 2007/2008 rate of 1.50.

      Boy, those were great times to be holidaying in Euroland. And the US.

      Like

  80. 367
    this septic pile says:

    is Jeremy Klaxon the BBC’s spoof on ‘balance’?

    from the red corner they air the moans of the institute of hand-wringing; and from the blue corner – in the tradition of Alf Garnett – oh gosh – oh gush – spouts the horn of bile himself.

    as in the case of Alf and Arthur Daly, cliches of ignorance bigotry and spivvery, they created Klaxon an amusing cameo of the superficiality boerishness irrelevance and inadequacy of the modern ‘bloke’

    then they realised how many people identified themselves with the (carefully scripted) act

    beware the mob!

    Like

  81. 372
    Zut Alors! says:

    oh no, zat is mon loverly country ow you say fucked into un cocked-hat.
    Zere is nuzzing worse than un socialist in un crisis!
    Are you ready to watch ze marketz ow you say plummet mes chums Anglais?

    Like

  82. 382
    rcynic says:

    Clarkson is an ignorant buffoon, and should not be taken seriously.
    The nutter’s on here who think he should be in politics, must mean The Monster Raving Loony Party, of which he is a life member.

    Like

  83. 383
    Child abuse survivor says:

    I didn’t even know Tom Watson was married, I thought he was gay.

    Like

  84. 384
    Child abuse survivor says:

    Perhaps his wife resented the time he was spending with Ian Wright in their lovely flat. Maybe thats the real reason she left him.

    Like


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Owen Paterson lifts the lid on the Green Blob:

“I received more death threats in a few months at Defra than I ever did as secretary of state for Northern Ireland.”



Flight Watch says:

Russia Today is a cauldron of bullsh*t. The only people that take it seriously are deluded conspiracy theorists. Other RT journos have resigned citing the same reasons.

It’s about as believable as Press TV, KCNA of North Korea or the Daily Mirror.


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