April 24th, 2012

Secretary of State Spook Connection

While all eyes are on a different courtroom this morning, the inquest into a the dead spook in a bag has already taken a fiction worthy turn of events. Channel Four reported last night, but have not written up on their website, the evidence submitted to the inquiry by the estate agent who managed the Pimlico pad where Gareth Williams was found dead and locked in a bag, saying it was rented from a company in St Hellier by an unnamed Secretary of State in September 2003. MI6 reports to the Foreign Secretary – if the flat was leased by anyone else then this will look very dodgy…

Jack Straw was Foreign Secretary at the time, and what with being sued for allegedly clearing extraordinary rendition, this is yet another very awkward headache for the elder statesman. It’s not yet come out whether the lease was transferred to subsequent Foreign Secretaries, but tongues are wagging…


125 Comments

  1. 1
    Will Straw says:

    Shut up and pass me a joint.

    Like

  2. 2
    tommy5d says:

    It’s all a bit “The Killing”…

    Like

  3. 3
    keredybretsa says:

    Poor old fella looking forward to meeting Alzi Heimer the way to forget!!

    Like

  4. 4
    Dave Cameron says:

    I’m calling it here first – Straw bummed and killed him.

    Like

  5. 5
    Buy a tin hat says:

    Do not go into the woods for a walk today Guido!
    Seen Alisdair lately?

    Like

  6. 6
    Purpleline says:

    Isn’t there a story alleging he broke into an office for some very important papers as a young activist, perhaps he was always their man or they turned him.

    Question have MI6 been infiltrated by Reds?

    Like

    • 12
      genghiz the kahn says:

      Is this the Norman Scott NI story, doing Jeremy Thrope a favour?

      Like

    • 17
      AC1 says:

      Vast Impenetrable Bureaucracy with huge budget and chance to feel good about yourself.
      Very little chance of the public finding out what you do?

      Of course Reds are going to flock to MI6 like flies to shit.

      Like

      • 117
        Philby, Trilby and Wilby says:

        Yes, and 3 of the flocked off to Moscow just before the net closed on them.

        Like

    • 119
      Trahison des Clercs says:

      He was big in Student Troubles way back. Was it the U.S. Embassy where the guy died trying to prevent the occupation. or was that Tariq Ali?

      Like

  7. 7
    The General Public says:

    Very much hoping to see Jack Straw get some long-overdue comeuppance, the slippery, evasive little shit.

    Like

    • 19
      Vazeline® The Slipperiest Substance On The Planet says:

      He once rubbed shoukders with me and…….it rubs off!

      Like

      • 34
        Col Nut says:

        I think you greased him to fit in the bag.

        Like

        • 58
          Big Mamma says:

          During Labour over its 13 year holding of office it will truly be a miracle if the Israilis’, Russians and Iranians found the time to penetrate both MI5 and MI6. They simply answered the advertisements with a “qualified” candidate.
          Jack “man of” Straw was possibly the most least effective in this post, but got away with it by “being reasonable” in his arguments.

          Like

          • King Charles Street lamppost says:

            You seem to have overlooked the caravan lady and Ed’s bro. But all much of a useless muchness really.

            Like

        • 71

          And both Harriet and I thank you for it – the brown envelopes fitted snugly without catching.

          Like

  8. 9
    Desperate Dan says:

    I seem to remember Jack Straw decided to open up security recruitment to multi-culturalism. He wanted illegal immigrants, jihadists, Israeli illegal settlers, untrustworthy foreigners and Pakistani suicide bombers to be given preference over British candidates who might possibly be patriots. Williams was probably betrayed by one of his multi-cultural colleagues. – So Straw can also be charged with accessory to murder.

    Like

    • 122
      Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

      Jack Straw was quite right to open up security recruitment to multi-culturalism ( I hope my Asian constituents are reading this, as well as the thousands of asylum seekers that I brought in to my constituency). As far as the security services are concerned, they should be abolished, especially MI5, after all the embarrassing questions they asked me about my private life, when Katia was being investigated. Boaz.

      http://politicalscrapbook.net/2010/12/mike-hancock-fashion-icon/

      Like

  9. 11
    Jeez, you really are joking says:

    Elder statesman? I’ve just sprayed a mouthful of meths over my screen!

    Like

  10. 14
    Specsavers says:

    Have you photoshopped Happy Jack’s Himmler glasses off!

    Like

  11. 16
    Q says:

    The court case will be set right after the Huhne alleged speeding offence. Right around the 12th of never

    Like

  12. 18
    Jack Straw says:

    Look, the man committed suicide and in his dying moments got into a bag, dismembered himself and padlocked the bag. What’s the problem?

    Like

  13. 20
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Look, look, I’m a safe pair of hands.

    Like

  14. 21
    Jack Straw says:

    Look, Mrs Thatcher disguised herself as me, got into my office and signed the rendition papers. What’s the problem?

    Like

  15. 22
    Pillar box person from Blackburn says:

    Good he wanted to ban my Niqab as it made a good sound bite at the time

    Like

    • 67
      I Remember You Hoo says:

      Didn’t Straw, as Home Seretary, try to send someone to prison for saying something that Straw admitted was 100% true, a few years later?

      Like

  16. 23
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Nude muppet show.

    Oh, bugger, the caption competition isn’t until Friday.

    Like

  17. 26
    Diego Garcia says:

    Why is my name mentioned in every Straw story? I have never met the man

    Like

  18. 27
    Piper-Payers-R-Us says:

    Who owns Jack Straw these days?

    Like

  19. 28
    Divide and rule, honky! says:

    I’m surprised Guido isn’t covering today’s piece in the Telegraph by Lee Jasper in which he says blàck people can’t be ràcist.

    Like

  20. 30
    The Boss says:

    And let us never forget Jack Straw welcoming an illegal immigrant to the UK with a shake of the hand as he climbed out of the back of a truck in Dover,inspiring 10’s of thousands to come to the land of ‘milk n’ honey’.

    Like

  21. 33
    Jack Straw says:

    Oy Vey, it was The Mossad what did it!

    Like

  22. 35
    Steve Miliband says:

    It was clearly a shut and shut case

    Like

  23. 37
    Jack Straw says:

    I had an elderly Holocàust survivor manhandled and detained under the Prevention of Terrorism Act for heckling me.

    Vote Labour! We’re the nice party!

    Like

  24. 38
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

    Straw – a Liebour elder statesman slippery little toady, hired for his ‘guile and low cunning’. http://bit.ly/cgdmuX

    Like

    • 68
      Big Mamma says:

      Will never forget the enquiry when the presiding judge stated to the woman lawyer that Jack Straw is a lawyer. And her reply being “but his is not an international lawyer” Slap slap and headbut.

      Like

  25. 40
    Abu Craptada says:

    I’d like to backdate my benefits to 1754.

    Like

    • 44
      Dr Who says:

      With your belief system dating from the 11th century you should go further back matey. No doubt you’ll get it

      Like

  26. 41
    Farage for PM says:

    Don’t miss the UKIP mayoral candidate on Brillo’s show at midday.

    Like

  27. 43
    Loungelizard says:

    How many Labour Ministers claimed expenses on this flat? we must be told!

    Like

  28. 51
    Corleone says:

    Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in.

    Like

  29. 59
    The Man of Straw says:

    I bend any way the wind is blowing – was that you farting Tony?

    Like

  30. 61
    Desperate Dan says:

    I seem to remember Jack Straw decided to open up security recruitment to multi-culturalism. He wanted illegal immigrants, jihadists, illegal settlers, untrustworthy foreigners and Pakistani suicide bombers to be given preference over British candidates who might possibly be patriots. Williams was probably betrayed by one of his multi-cultural colleagues. – So Straw can also be charged with accessory to murder.

    Like

  31. 62
    Desperate Dan says:

    I seem to remember Jack Straw decided to open up security recruitment to multi-culturalism. He wanted illegal immigrants, jihadists, untrustworthy foreigners and Pakistani suicide bombers to be given preference over British candidates who might possibly be patriots. Williams was probably betrayed by one of his multi-cultural colleagues. – So Straw can also be charged with accessory to murder.

    Like

  32. 66
    Desperate Dan says:

    I’ve posted the same thing three times. I’ve left out references to chosen people cos I know you think they have to have special treatment and can’t be mentioned. And still you won’t publish. What’s the matter with you?

    Like

  33. 69
    Johnny says says:

    “where Gareth Williams was found cut up and locked in a bag”

    I thought he was just in the bag? Were the speculations at the time that he could have done it to himself a load of bullshit?

    Like

  34. 72
    THE burnistoun butcher says:

    Anyone know if the Strawman was at Simpsons’ desparately trying to get some bag keys cut at the time of death?

    Like

  35. 80
    Penfold says:

    St Helier registered company…!!

    Would that be St Helier the capital of Jersey by any chance? an offshore tax haven.

    Whilst one accepts the need for cut-outs and secrecy, how does the Sec for State justify the SIS using offshore tax havens.

    Scandal brewing methinks…

    Like

    • 84
      genghiz the kahn says:

      Jack Accounting isn’t my strongest suit Straw- other than maxing out expenses and minimising tax liabilities.

      Like

  36. 92
    Alfa 101 detected on the Gaydar Screen says:

    Chris Bryant on Brillo now and not a Y front in sight

    Like

  37. 93

    Should we now know him as “JACK THE SHIPPER” – I think we should be told.

    Like

  38. 94
    "George Smiley" says:

    Well, the young lad was hanging around with some “unusual” characters, shall we say, and his computer had been used to access BDSM websites– when you play around in those circles, it’s all fun and games till somebody gets killed. Trust me, if we had done it, we’d have disposed of the corpse in a much more professional manner; we wouldn’t have left it in an apartment with a Minister’s title on the lease. The more intriguing question is why this poof was ever seconded to MI6 in the first place– was it his “Alan Turing” abilities, or his “Alan Turing” proclivities? This is probably a person who might know, if you catch my drift, but he seems to be a bit slow on the draw, as it were:

    Like

  39. 95
    A Tory says:

    Am I the only one to be impressed that Jack did the right thing for the national interest?

    Like

  40. 99
    Sniper says:

    Never mind Jack. At least you have never been accused of being a sex pest. Isn’t that right Jack?

    Like

  41. 100
    Webwrights says:

    The poor bloke was not “cut up”. He was in one piece in the bag, which is why it’s crucially important that he couldn’t have locked himself in.

    Like

    • 103
      Spank Sinatra says:

      Ummm…. don’t quite follow your logic as regards his ability to have locked himself inside the bag being dependent upon whether his body was whole or otherwise. Do explain…..

      Like

      • 112
        Webwrights says:

        There is no dispute about the fact that his body was not dismembered. Had he already been cut up, as Guido wrote, he would hardly have been in any state to do any locking himself. It would then have unquestionably have involved A.N.Other. His body was intact, therefore there remains room for doubt as to whether it was suicide/accident/ritual/murder/whatever.

        Like

  42. 101
    Jane Birkin from Paris says:

    If i have been paying for this flat I will want to know a bit more about it how much it has cost me and who the fuck has been using it and why.

    I will also want details of all rent reviews lease negotiations and any renovation repair and furnishing costs plus details of all utility payments made.

    And before I am told to fuck off I have three words to say: FREEDOM OF INFORMATION

    Like

  43. 102
    • 107
      WA3 says:

      He truly is an odious little self regarding prick.

      Still his results speak for themselves

      “Chris has contacted BT and arranged for the shoes that were tied to the telephone wires on Lodge Drive to be removed”

      Top notch

      Like

  44. 105
    Cressida says:

    The flat was completely clean after my lads carefully checked it. What else do I have to do to become Commissioner?

    Like

  45. 114
    Anonymous says:

    Jack Straw is a C**t – full stop. Guilty of so much they should throw away the key. BUT one man controls his fate – David Cameron. The evidence is there to see a lot of the last government on trial, with some MI5/6 officers. Will Cameron allow it – NO F’IN CHANCE.

    Like

  46. 115
    Anonymous says:

    I blame the culture of partying and fast cars as reported elsewhere. Too busy playing at 007 yet lacking the characters civility.
    Smacks of Public School Behaviour, aided and abetted by the FSB and the CIA.

    Like

  47. 123
    (I've been renamed) DA-Notice says:

    Transfer a lease? Can you? Parties to a contract, signatories, etc. Possible novation…

    Like

  48. 124
    get them, get them all says:

    Straw’s going down.
    Blair next, hopefully.

    Like


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