April 16th, 2012

Spelman’s Injunction Son Banned From Rugby

Caroline Spelman’s son Jonny has been banned from rugby until October 19 2013.

PA reports that the rising England star “admitted taking a number of drugs, including anabolic steroids and a growth hormone, when he appeared before an independent disciplinary tribunal on March 26.”

Despite the story being true the multi-millionaire Environment Secretary spent the equivalent of entire MP’s annual salary trying to repress it and stop it from appearing in the Daily Star Sunday.

Another stunning privacy injunction success… 


  1. 1
    Hang him! says:

    Oh, naughty lad!


  2. 2
    Disco Biscuit says:

    How old is he again?


  3. 4
    genghiz the kahn says:

    I guess that calling for Obama’s head on a silver platter is now a non story.


    • 22
      Guardian reader, foaming at the mouth says:

      I’m afraid that locking people up for what they say/tweet is only to be applied to indigenous English males. This is correct since it is the result of thousands of years of persecution by white males.


  4. 5
    Popcorn, Popcorn, Get Your Popcorn Here says:

    Doesn’t anyone care if he eats pasties? The media are so fickle.


  5. 6
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    And our wonderful popular newspapers probably won’t cover it. Few excuses for huge amounts of cleavage or arse photographs. Or “isn’t she shockingly young but heres a photo of her in a bikini”


  6. 8
    Superman says:

    Well Tories take drugs don’t they? And they can afford them.


  7. 9
    Anonymous says:

    I don’t know what he’s been taking, but he looks 30 weeks pregnant.


  8. 12
  9. 15
    CrapCleaner says:

    Ketamine is sooo yesterday, I suppose.


  10. 18
    Blue Stratos Guy says:

    As with all overprivileged types, rubber Jonny will bounce back.


  11. 24
    Sophie says:

    Maybe he can get a job meantime in one of those agricultural businesses his Mum is close to.

    Or maybe a year out in Brazil supervising the protection of the rainforest with the £10 million+ of taxpayers money his Mum gave to them.

    Or he could just stay at home & be his Mum’s paid nanny.

    Vote UKIP.


  12. 27
    I am not inspired by Edinburgh socialiast dogshite. Get real! Socialist Meddling Scum. says:

    Ha ha ha!


  13. 30
    I am not related to Edinburgh Game Pkmaying Scum. Get Real. Arsehole. says:

    What a pathetic arse.


  14. 31
    Black Armband says:

    Ah!……a day off at last.


  15. 33
    Gordon Brown says:

    anyone for Pooh Sticks?


  16. 35
    Jimmy says:

    That paper really has no standards at all.


  17. 37
    Edinburgh Delusional Scum says:

    He thought his mummy could magic it away. What a Mong!


  18. 38
    Ironside says:

    So he clearly lied to his parents.

    Fruit falling far from the tree ?


  19. 41
    Edinburgh Delusional Scum! says:

    This story has been lying dormant for months now.


  20. 42
    Ammanita Phalloides says:

    He looks as if he’s been buggered by the Nubian-with some peculiar results.


  21. 43
    Edinburgh Delusional Scum says:

    Tbh. He just looks fat. Dieting pills next.


  22. 45
    Ah! Monika says:

    Pippa Middleton at centre of probe after friend waves handgun in car in Paris.

    Evening Standard


  23. 54
    Another Delusional Uninspiring Old Bag in Edinburgh says:



  24. 55
    Edinburgh Delusional Scum says:

    Is he hiding his pack lunch under his rugby top?


  25. 56
    Mr. Putin's Stolen Cat says:

    Steroids banned? Well, that puts most of the meat and dairy industry in jeopardy – as Mummy will tell you.


  26. 58
    If religious people don't want to be laughed at, they shouldn't believe stupid things says:

    As an evagelical creationist christian, surely all Spelman had to do was pray for the problem to go away? We all know how well prayer works. Just ask all the people who’ve died of cancer, been tortured and killed. The recording made by Myra Hindley and Ian Brady of one of their victims contained her pleas to her captors as well as begging god to save her. That worked.


    • 63
      Damien 666 Thompson says:

      Every morning I pray over my cornflakes that my job will still be there when I arrive at the offce. It does seem to work.


    • 67
      Ivor Tapeworm says:

      God is all-seeing, all-powerful, and omnipresent, so he knows what goes on and can do something about it. Even a child being murdered.

      However, if you don’t pray about it, God will just ignore it, otherwise there would be point in prayer, would there?

      So if God exists, he’s a Hoon.


  27. 59
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Blimey, Breivik cries at his own propaganda film, just like Kev Livingturd does.


  28. 62
    Anonymous says:

    A teenage lad makes a mistake, a non story. One wonders how many mistake Guido’s children have made!


  29. 68
    Ah! Monika says:


    Ms Fadil told the court she had attended several parties at Mr Berlusconi’s villa outside Milan.

    She alleges that the first night she went, she saw two young women in nun costumes stripping for the prime minister. One, she said, was Nicole Minetti, now a regional councillor for Berlusconi’s People of Freedom party in Milan.


  30. 70
    Lord Levinson and his legal cowboys says:


    Another disgrace in the House of Ermin Vermin FFS


    Abolish that House I say…


  31. 77
    Deep Fried Salad says:

    So lets be clear. He took a shit load of dodgy drugs and it took £61k to hide the story and he looks as fit as Billy Bunter in a cake shop. He woz worf it!


  32. 78
    Caroline Spelman says:

    Don’t beat yourself up about it, my little soldier.

    Love from Mummy x x

    P.S. Loving Guido’s blog.


  33. 80
    Bounty Hunter says:

    I’m offering a £10 bounty to whoever finds Ed Miliband’s brain.


  34. 95
    John Bercow says:

    Hey, where do he get these growth hormones from Guido?


  35. 97
    not a machine says:

    LOL see Dan hodges photoshop telegraph , getting da respect vote , with da donny massive ………….


  36. 99
    BREAKING WIND!!! says:

    The World Bank has announced that Jim Yong Kim will be the next President.


  37. 100
    Some Geezer wot's never had the "Badger Game" (google it) played on him says:

    Caroline Spelman, Mother of the Year and sworn enemy of the badger population:

    “Honey Badger don’t give a shit!”
    And apparently, neither did she, till the tabloids came around.


  38. 101
    Another Coe-tastrophe? says:

    Jonny won’t be staying up to watch the Olympic flame being lit then?
    Rumours abound not to expect the lighting of the Olympic torch until ‘midnight or later’ for the sake of ‘The American Market’.


  39. 102
    keredybretsa says:

    Well that is good news for the environment, innit?


  40. 103
    Jonathan says:

    Glad the drug cheating bastard has been banned from playing rugby. It should have been a life time ban. However, despite the ban being but a measly 21 months, mummy and daddy Spelman are appealing against the savage sentence dished out to their twerp of a son. An utter moron. Very glad it has cost the parents so much money to try (and fail) in safeguarding (?) the spoilt little brat’s “privacy”.


  41. 106
    dr. strangelove says:

    I see the anabolic steroids worked wonders on his stomach stop I think I will recommend him for further tests to my very good friend Dr Mengele down in Rio .


  42. 108
    Maggies Pearl Necklace says:

    I know the lad, he trains at our gym, he’s a nice kid who made a mistake and built like a brick shit house, this is a bad photo.


  43. 110
    CLINT Cameron says:

    spellman is a c’unt


  44. 118
    PC clitoris says:

    one law/rule for the toffs/upper classes and their offspring another for us plebs.
    we keep voting the buggers in for god sake,will the british ever wise up!!!


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