Thursday, March 29, 2012

BREAKING: Liam Byrne to Resign from ShadCab

As predicted here, Baldamort is off to run for Mayor of Birmingham. A smart move…

UPDATE: Comrades greet the news:

UPDATE II: Byrne’s people are said to be furious that this has leaked today. He won’t go until a referendum has gone through in Brum, but had told Ed his intention to run today. The Watson-backed Sion Simon campaign, which will be the Brownite alternative to Byrne, are being accused of dirty tricks in spoiling their rivals launch and briefing the news out on a busy day for minimal impact. This one is going to get nasty…

Sarah Sands is the New Standard Editor

Sources over in Kensington say that it will be announced tomorrow that the current acting editor of the Evening Standard Sarah Sands has got the job full time. Apparently she was on the verge of walking having been told she was out of the race a matter of weeks ago, but a heavy lobbying operation by Boris swung it for her. Поздравляю!

UPDATE: Guido understands that Sands had formally resigned and accepted the offer to go as Deputy to the Mail on Sunday with Geordie Greig, before things turned around.

Murdochs to Appear Before Leveson

Davis Strikes Below the Waterline

It wouldn’t be a terrible week for Dave without his old chum David Davis weighing in. He’s told the BBC “look at the front bench. They see them, all very well turned out, well-fed, they look like they’re in a completely different world.” When asked whether the PM was out of tough Davis helpfully added “it’s an unfair allegation, but it works.” Finally he echoed what lots of Tories are thinking: what the hell is going on in Downing Street?

UPDATE: Here is the audio:

Millionaire Part-Time MP Surfaces

Even when David Miliband is looking like he is praising his kid brother, he still can’t resist twisting the knife in every so often. This month it is the turn of GQ to interview the part-time MP:

The British people are very good at – how I can put this delicately? – the British admire nothing so much as someone who’s lost, that is a very endearing British quality. Everyone has disappointments in their life and so it creates an immediate point of empathy.

Ed may be having a good week, but that is more the fault of the Tories. Strange of David to play up his connection to the people as if someone else is lacking it…

Manchester Mystery

Guido will eat his hat if Lucy Powell does not win the Labour selection process for Manchester Central. Ed’s Deputy Chief of Staff is in a bit of a pickle though. Given that she somehow managed to work her way  onto the controversial new party executive board, how is her selection going to look like anything other than a stitch up? This one doesn’t appear to have been thought through…

Sorry Seems To Be the Hardest Word

Ken is wriggling. In today’s Jewish Chronicle he writes:

“Let me start with the report that I said at a meeting of mainly pro-Labour Jewish Londoners that Jews will not vote for me because they are rich. I didn’t actually say this. However, I can see that the way the conversation unfolded meant this interpretation was placed on it. When such controversies unfold it is easy to get dug in and appear to defend positions. I don’t wish to do this.”

Almost there…

Mayday

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Guido understands that one of the more fiery witnesses due to appear at the Leveson Inquiry has been notified about their impending star turn. Rebekah Brooks is said to have been told on Tuesday that she will be on the stand at the very beginning of May. Though she will be severely hindered in what she can say due to ongoing police investigations, this could be very awkward for the Prime Minister…


Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath


Rising Stars
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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


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