March 21st, 2012

Budget Bingo


  1. 1
    Check your local Hospital says:

    Cut tax an spending then watch lefties engage in class warfare.

    Perfect day!

  2. 2
    David Camoron says:

    Gosh, I’ve been struggling with a tough Budget problem. Do you think we should pay for India to put a man on the Moon? Or two men?

  3. 3
    taC eht abbaJ says:

    Does class 4 contribution threshold go up and the rate come down? Not holding my breath…

  4. 4
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Typical BBC, they’ve now wheeled out some Muslim apologist who is blaming the Jews for this fucking mong who slaughtered those kids.

    Funny that WHEN the BBC thought it was done by a nasty right winger, the BBC were happy to give us every detail of how the children died.

    Now however, the BBC are telling us that not all Muslims are like this and that the dirty Jews are to blame in Israel.

    It doesn’t take them long at the BBC does it?

  5. 5
    MandyPickleSniffer says:

    Can we just distract everyone from the messiness of our mess-cleaning efforts by starting up Falklands War II ?

    And hopefully they’ll change planning laws such that you can put up a dormer window that looks right into your neighbour’s bedroom window, without having to apply for planning permission. As it stands now, I can only put in a Velux skylight type thing…and then I have to stand on a stool and can barely see anything.

  6. 6
    AC1 says:


    From the comments on Sky’s article (French police surround Islamist child murderer) it looks like rather a few others have noticed the the “games” the MSM play.

  7. 7
    daveyone1 says:

    This takes just 90 seconds but could make all the difference!

  8. 8
  9. 9
    Joss Taskin says:

    Where’s the box with the narrative ‘Red Ken to start paying Income Tax’ ??

  10. 10
    Joss Taskin says:

    March 7th ? Did I blink and miss something ?

  11. 11
    smoggie says:

    If we could put 500 million of them on the moon then I’m all for it.

  12. 12
    Chuka Umunna says:

    Income Tax is for little people.

  13. 13
    Word says:

    Spending’s in Feb was at £15bn It’s a lefty wet dream.

  14. 14
    Marcel Dassault says:

    There should of course be enormous taxes on Tycoons.
    Oh sorry, I thought you said Typhoon.

  15. 15
    P.Mandevilson, the Eminence Greasy says:

    You can stick Vince’s Mansion Tax up my arse !

  16. 16
    Rage Against the Political Elite. says:

    Great to hear the THEM and US, The RICH v The Poor. Governments can be such a bore, trotting out the same old Sh-t.
    Divide and conquer tactics wont work this time as We all Rich and Poor are paying too much TAX. The TAX take is too big and you fuc-ing stupid C-nts are spending it on NON commercial activity, simple. Reduce the TAX on everyone and Stop stealing it out of the economy. THE more HM Revenue take the Less we have in the economy, Simple again. Why dont we here that from the economists Wanke-s at the LSE.

  17. 17
    daveyone1 says:

    Maybe so sign the petiton to your MP now it could make all the difference!?!

  18. 18
    Marcel Dassault says:

    Right oh. so we aren’t allowed to talk about the tax on very rich people. Tyk-hoons.

  19. 19
    David Camoron says:

    Oh cripes. That causes a teensy conundrum; I was planning to bulldoze England and bury it under housing development and rail links, so those 500 million could all live here, but you’ve just suggested a far more ambitious plan.

    What if we send 250 million to the Moon, and build enough homes for 250 million here? After all, the population of 250 million here will double in size in about 20 years, then we can build homes for 250 million more.

  20. 20
    the beast of nairobi says:

    If we dd that just whereould we get a few pints of milk at 23:00 ?

  21. 21
    David Camoron says:

    Sticking things up your arse is a core Conservative value.

  22. 22
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Does Dave realise his policies are going to condemn us to another 20 or 30 years of Labour ?
    If they didn’t want to win the election why did they form a coalition ?

  23. 23
    Gordon Brown says:

    Tax cuts take money out of the economy.

  24. 24
    Uncle Twiggle says:

    Britain wants to put the first woman on the moon – but for some reason Harriet Harman refuses to go………

  25. 25
    Polly ( via satellite link in Tuscany ) says:

    I support the Mansion

  26. 26
    the beast of nairobi says:

    get a periscope and thermal imaging eqpt

  27. 27
    Mr Helpful says:

    The fridge?

  28. 28
    annette curton says:

    Doesn’t Vince still call it playing Housey-housey?.

  29. 29
    David Camoron says:

    I love petitions! My butler stacks them all up in the bathroom, so we never have to buy toilet paper.

  30. 30
    M says:

    I’ve a circus cannon on stand by if she changes mind

  31. 31
    Anonymous says:

    Osborne talks about neutral budget how will it be neutral if he has to borrow £130m to spend?

    We need a balance budget, maximum you spend is what you earn or in government’s case what others earn and you take out of them.

    If you want to spend more increase taxes if you want to tax less cut spending.

  32. 32
    daveyone1 says:

    see the one above the video then answer this simple question Mr. Cameron; How much is a litre of petrol?

  33. 33
    smoggie says:

    If it wasn’t for the fact that the German war effort was so dissipated by the Wermacht having to haul trainloads of mewling je­ws around the country they’d have defeated the Allies. The chosen ones have much to answer for.

  34. 34
    Tony Blair Millionaire says:

    You can try taxing us if you like, but we’ll always find ways around it.

  35. 35
    Anonymous says:

    It does when it is send to tax heavens.

  36. 36
    Loungelizard says:

    Looks like the Budget might be aimed straight at the overpaid PollyTwaddle.

  37. 37
    smoggie says:

    About 1000 cc.

  38. 38
    annette curton says:

    What if you can’t afford to get down to London.

  39. 39
    daveyone1 says:

    I wish Guido had a ‘like’ button I just can’t be asked to answer all these points

  40. 40
    will says:

    it could have been worse a lab-lib coalition, a complete nightmare, with the lib dems next to gordon as the economy goes down the toilet. we would have lost our AAA rating and the IMF would be having tea at no 10. Also obama would not bother saying hello to gordon.

  41. 41
    Mornington Crescent says:


    Just as amusing is hearing Beeboid news presenters referring to ‘the Rich’ in the third person and ‘the poor’ in the first person. Evan Davis was at it this morning.

    As fucking if. All of those vain, vacuous twats are on 6-figure salaries plus expenses – at our expense, to boot.

  42. 42
    An alien passing by earth to somewhere important says:

    Humanity from this point of view is so fucked up

  43. 43
    will says:

    I think we should have a polly budget, any person who ownes an overseas villa to be taxed at 100% of its value. Takes from the rich to give to the poor polly should approve. But i bet its all in a trust fund well away from IHT.

  44. 44
    Winston Churchill says:

    It was the worst alternative, except for all the others.

  45. 45
    Fred West Paving Ltd. says:

    Isn’t it a bit gay?

  46. 46
    Fred West Paving Ltd. says:

    Overspending surely? 15bn wouldn’t pay for the dole scum.

  47. 47
    Gay Fascist says:

    Two men, but only if they are married to each other.

  48. 48
    David Camoron says:

    Look, there’s nothing I can do about the pr*ice of petrol, it’s entirely out of my hands.

    If the general public are having trouble fueling-up their Bentleys, why not cut back? Instead of 3 holidays in Chamonix this year, why not just take two? Or you could have an energy company put a wind turbine on some corner of your mansion’s grounds, then you can claim a government subsidy. My father-in-law does that, and makes more than a grand a day!

    There you go! Toodle pip.

  49. 49

    Dole scum? Anyone can be unemployed these days. It ain’t just for scum now.

  50. 50
  51. 51
    Bob Shawadiwadi says:

    No IR35 Mk II, that’s another budget rumour

  52. 52
    Osama the Nazarene says:

    Where’s Brillo?

  53. 53
    Not at my expense. says:

    This is why I don’t pay the license fee.

    That and everything on BBC TV is politically-correct crap.

  54. 54
    daveyone1 says:

    So what is that exactly you do have in your hand, Mr,Cameron , oh sorry it must be a German sausage!

  55. 55
    dai says:

    france 24 news has one of d fatbots sisters commenting on the killings in toulouse by some fucking raghead, claiming its all the fault on the ban on the Veil , she was sounding if she admired him, its fucking unbelievable, she has spoken to him as well, plus she is a brit, god sake where is the IDF when you need them

  56. 56
    dr. sipp says:

    tits up tax down budget

  57. 57
    dai says:

    But the property will be in some one else’s name

  58. 58
    Limp Dumbs says:

    Oops, we leak a lot!

  59. 59
    David Camoron says:

    Putting two fudgepacking astronauts on the Moon is a core Conservative value.

  60. 60
    sandy says:

    My prediction:

    Ed Balls does flat lining gesture as Ed Miliband has heart attack.

  61. 61
    daveyone1 says:

    entre your postcode here!

  62. 62
    sandy says:

    Are there any very rich people left outside the public sector?

  63. 63
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Gave it up myself a couple of years ago.

    If there was a radio equivalent to Sky News (or some such) I’d retune today – and, indeed, Today.

  64. 64
    daveyone1 says:

    I do have a wind turbine in my grounds but it is not tax deductable coz it trims the hedges too. I will have to use those ducks to polish the Bently too when they leave their little house in the pond!

  65. 65
    Ed Balls MP says:

    The trouble with tax cuts is that, aside from the State having less money to piss away, an evil in itself, people might use the extra dosh to actually pay their debts instead of spending it on goods and services. It is an article of faith for me that people should never pay their debts, as this slows down the economy when too few quid are chasing too many goods and services. So you are spot-on, Gordon! (Of course, if we were in Government, we would address that by increasing spending ourselves, priming the pump, as it were. And you know me, Gordon, I’ve been priming my pump ever since I was a mere strip of a lad!)

  66. 66
    Stinkfinger says:

    To make up for the shortage of pensioners in this country,tax on fags and booze will increase to encourage people to give up these vices and live longer.

  67. 67
    Taxfodder says:

    Budgets come and go same old story……

    Roundly fleece those that have worked hard to provide for themselves, family and old age,

    Give the lions share to the feckless and proliferate while squandering the family inheritance on hair brain headline making schemes that in the long run always cost far more than they save.

    Continue to waste another 5 billion on the Afghan incursion whilst lining up the IMF for another massive multi billion bung to aid the failed Euro experiment.

    UK open for business?

    Wide Open to wasters thieves and down and outs more like!

  68. 68
    jgm2 says:

    I’m going 2,5,9,11, 13,18,19,22

  69. 69
    Stinkfinger says:

    …then again,looking at it logicaly pensioners will need to be healthy so as to be able to fend off the bag snatchers who were shipped in to fill the demographic trough.

  70. 70
    Fish says:

    Mini Guido away from school, sick eh? What time do Hull City kick off?

  71. 71
    NASA Spokesharman says:

    Sorry to inform you but on seeing that train wreck of an interview that Harman gave last week, it is clear that she is well beyond the moon and is orbiting about somewhere in the vicinity of Pluto.

  72. 72
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    What is this “licence fee” you lot drone on about? It isn’t compulsory to have a TV (last time I looked – 1984 and all that). Just bin the TV. Most contributors here regard the content as unadulterated crap, so why gawp at it? Free yourself. Don’t pay the licence fee – legally.

  73. 73
    will says:

    It will help flush out what a hyprocrite she is !!

  74. 74
    Darth Varder says:

    I believe that the BBC bias and harangueing on the French killings is serious enough for a proper complaint to the regulatory body, especially as their interview with a French minister constitutes making an ally with a serious tragedy angry. I will put the evidence together and send one.
    On the matter of the budget I will go with the item “Dave’s Death Stare at Bercow” (and his loony wife) but it must have real impact, and I am available to give training on this.

  75. 75
    BBC Watcher says:

    Be prepared to get a new BBC note in the post. Even when you reply to them as I did in February by phone, they sent me another one this week stating I had not replied. Await the Final Warning letter so I can respond in kind.

  76. 76
    BBC Watcher says:

    We all missed it.

  77. 77
    Fred West Paving Ltd. says:

    Scum either way

  78. 78
    Chris says:

    Can we have a bingo shout for Ed Balls saying “look” at the start of every sentence

  79. 79
    Mornington Crescent says:

    I have binned the TV, FFS, hence my reference to the radio. I even politely greeted the inspectors and let them in to check – they were pretty stunned, actually.

  80. 80
    AC1 says:

    We can see from France that Islam is a metastatic terrorism problem from the Afghan-P4kistan region. How do you suggest dealing with Islamic colonists?

  81. 81

    Come on Fred… you can’t just bury the truth and pave it over, pretending it’s not…. oh wait a minute! Constable, hand me that shovel!

  82. 82

    The only people tax increases hurts are the middle and low paid.

    Explanation: CEO’s of large companies tend to get paid in stock options as part of their bonus package – these are taxed differently, and lower, so you won’t get it here.

    Owner drivers of private companies employing a few people are going to see the biggest chunk from their bank account, so they will downsize until the market is more favourable, and that probably means redundancies, or at least less working hours/ pay for the lower paid workers, less NI less tax, (The increased tax rate is the equivalent of saying you work for someone else, even though it is your company and your risk) or they’ll retire early, shut the millstone down and turf everyone out to look for non existent work elsewhere, while playing golf somewhere warm.

    The net cost of raising the tax rate is like pissing yourself in a dark suit – you’ll feel all warm and relaxed for a while, no one else notices a thing for a bit, but your great idea will get cold, uncomfortable and smell of piss very quickly.

    Still, Labour do love smelling of piss, don’t they, with little Ed as the biggest toss pot.

    Solidarity Bro’s, innit.

  83. 83

    Harridan Harman wouldn’t deliver that time at night.

  84. 84
    Martha ( of the Vandellas ) says:

    RE number 24 ” Cameron Death Stare to Bercow ”

    That one should be given a bye because Bercow was not on the Speakers Chair for Budget Speech .

    He chickened out and nominated his Deputy .

    No doubt took a stroll instead on this fine Spring day to marvel at the kaleidoscope country on a kaleidoscope day and then went to the Funfair to try his hand on the kaleidoscope stall — no doubt returning to his quarters to see his wife in her usual attire of kaleidoscope romper suit.

  85. 85

    AND to continue working until they are 127 before collecting their £3 per week state pension, adjusted downwards because of their non veil wearing, kiddy molesting suicide bomb apologist leanings, known as the Sharia Sheering (SS) – all you white sheep will pay!

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