February 21st, 2012

Chuka Jousting for His Career

Normally Chuka is so in line with public outrage that his position shifts before the public have even worked out what they are angry about, so it’s rare to hear people declaring that he “got it wrong”. The Standard reported last week:

“A rising star in the Labour party came under fire today for supporting a decision to cancel the Lambeth Country Show. Shadow business secretary Chuka Umunna backed Lambeth council after it scrapped the free three-day event, which attracts up to 200,000 people each July.”

In 2010, Chuka said the show was what the community “was all about”:

So why was he prepared to sell his constituents out this time?

Brixton residents are said to be “up in arms” about the “eccentric mix of outdoor musical performances, sheep shearing, jousting and vegetable-growing” being cancelled so that resources are not diverted from the Olympics. Under fire, the Labour council, led by one Steve Reed, was boosted when Chuka weighed in on their side. 

Things haven’t always been so cosy between these two though. As a long-term local councillor, Reed believed he would be a shoo in for the Streatham seat until some hot-shot, sharp-suited lawyer, with friends in high places, came out of nowhere. However with Streatham preparing to feel the full weight of the Boundary Review, Reed has his local MP by the balls.

Chuka is first in line to take the new mega-safe Brixton seat, but all that could change. As a Brixton councillor, Reed has a lot of local support and could make life difficult for Chuka very easily. In choosing to keep Reed sweet on this issue, Chuka has put his future career before his constituents. He’s not wrong on public opinion here, it’s just beneath him…


  1. 1
    Aint he our saviour? says:

    Thought Chuka was the British Obama?


    • 3
      misterned says:

      Yup, he’s just as much of a lying, twisting, two faced, dick as Obama.


      • 27
        lola says:

        C***a is a c**t


        • 30
          genghiz the kahn says:

          Chuka the man who put the count into Lambeth Country Fair.


          • Neo-Guido says:

            comment of the day!


          • Supernova says:

            Why do they always refer to him as a rising star? Seriously, you can’t mention Chuka without mentioning him being a rising star.

            He doesn’t appear remarkable in any sense whatsoever, certainly not worth being described as a rising star.


          • Yokel says:

            I don’t live in London, but isn’t Lambeth part of that city?
            A ‘country’ fair?


          • Anonymous says:

            It has been going for over 30 years non-stop, eccentric is a good description, but also immensely popular, politically incorrect (almost certain to incluce spoof Olympics that would give Locog apoplexy) and a true example/catalyst of local community initiatives outside of the control of the apparatchiks. Hence the reason the Council has never liked it and is seizing on an excuse to kill it off.


          • taC eht abbaJ says:

            “I don’t live in London, but isn’t Lambeth part of that city?
            A ‘country’ fair?”

            Of course it’s a country fair, it encompasses residents from Nigeria, Ghana, Somalia, and every third world country under the sun but our own, geddit?


    • 85
      nellnewman says:

      Only in his dreams.


    • 96
      Lickity-Split says:

      what is it with all these Leftie’s? They all have the same facial expression all the time! Furrowed brow, a combination of extreme irritation coupled with confusion. That cooper is the same. Sallow faced bind – you’d have to be a special kind of twisted to marry that foul congregation of misery and intolerance!

      Ahhh glad that’s off my chest


      • 104
        Herne Hill Harrier says:

        Anonymous says: ‘…a true example/catalyst of local community initiatives outside of the control of the apparatchiks. Hence the reason the Council has never liked it and is seizing on an excuse to kill it off.’

        Considering that it’s been ORGANISED by the bloody council for the last 30 years… by the Amenities Department in my day and is largely staffed by council workers, I think you may have misinformed yourself.


    • 124
      Hang The Bastards says:

      chukka khan as self serving as ever.


  2. 2
    jgm2 says:

    Shoo in?


  3. 4
    Chucky says:

    My suits are rather expensive.


  4. 6
    AC1 says:

    Yet again the fucking Olympics fucking something up.


  5. 7
    Raving Loon says:

    Chuka went to St Dunstan’s College, a fee paying school in South East London. Just saying.


  6. 8
    JuliaM says:

    “He’s not wrong on the public opinion here, it’s just beneath him.”

    Thus proving he really IS the British Obama!


  7. 10
    Blank sheet of paper says:

    But if you have no policy how can you be wrong?


  8. 12
    JH says:

    I wonder if they would cancel the Notting Hill Festival because of the Olympics.

    Of course not. That would be racist. Let’s pick on something evocative of culture closer to home instead.


  9. 13
    Peter Expat says:

    Funny to think Brixton was once a Tory seat.


    • 22
      AC1 says:

      Mandlesons dad Ralph “built (Jerrymandered) the tories out of London”.

      Making it the wonderful diverse mix of African voodoo child-sacrifice, Caribbean crime gangs and arab dodgy dealing it is today.


    • 25
      CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

      Shows what a corrupt local political party can do when it gerrymanders the electoral demographics with immigration.


      • 58
        Whatever happened to cockneys? says:

        The decision to Balkanise the UK, was taken at national level. Local government just facilitated it, as entirely naturally, the newcomers wanted to live among their own kith and kin. Those who could see what was happening simply left and the urban downward spiral was set in motion.


  10. 14
    Did you Know says:

    …that Chuka & Guido have 50% in common?
    they both have Irish mothers


    • 80
      Countdown dick-an-'arry's corner says:

      And spookily, their names begin with capital letters, each has five letters, neither has a ‘z’ in them, the middle letters of their names are both vowels, and both names end in a vowel.


  11. 19
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Get the popcorn in for more of this Liebore infighting over the boundary changes, added to Murdoch backing Scottish independence (It’s the Scottish Sun what won it!) and hopefully Welsh independence as well.

    Miliband will be 90 seats down before even fighting the next election :-)


  12. 20

    Only uncritical, unthinking, hereditary Labour voting simpletons would think Chukup is a suitable person to represent them in Parliament. That he’s a status seeking, social climbing chancer who will do, and say, anything to achieve his overweening ambition doesn’t enter into his constituents’ tiny minds.

    His voters are so thick they can’t see he’s using them for his own selfish ends. Does anyone else think this shyster really believes the shite he continually spouts?

    Umunna is a prime example of the downside of affirmative action.


  13. 21
    Andrew Jones says:

    Another exciting story from Guido.

    Seriously, why don’t you become a politician yourself Paul and try to make a positive difference, instead of throwing these insignificant pebbles from the sidelines?

    Go on, step outside your comfort zone!


  14. 26
    nellnewman says:

    chuckourmoney has put his career before his constituents.

    Not much of a surprise there. Ever since the days of bliar and gordon, labour always made it clear that they thought the common man and woman was beneath them and their lofty troughing ideals.


  15. 28
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Chukka: You may not know that before I entered Parliament, I worked on a farm in New Zealand, shearing sheep.

    One day I walked into the woolshed and to my horror discovered a workmate being extremely familiar with one of our woolly friends.

    ‘MATE!’ I said, ‘you’re supposed to be SHEARING that sheep!’

    With a grin (and a grunt) he replied ‘I’m not sharing Matilda with ANYONE!’


    • 111
      Sydney Shore says:

      He obviously could not tell the difference between ‘six’ and ‘sex’ as enunciated in those far off isles.


  16. 34
    So what does it mean? says:


    • 72
      Simps says:

      Your dad used to make barrels.


    • 76
      I Remember You Hoo says:

      That means the cat is well and truly among the thieving pigeons in Brussels.

      That is of course if he and Cameron can hold their nerve and not collapse at the first prod from the EU comrades collective.


      • 112
        Sacre bleu says:

        Oh mon Dieu! Zis means zeez troffing MEPs will now throw their jouets out of ze pram as zey were expecting a 3% increase in zer salaries.


    • 101
      mote says:

      I wouldnt sign off the UK budget. Its as fucked up as the EU one


  17. 36
    Prince Charles ' Doppelganger says:

    Get the spelling right ol’ boy !! Either your name’s Chukka ( double k ) or you can’t play polo with our set . Nor can you wear Chukka boots :

    Chukka boots or turf boots (sometimes referred to as bucks) are ankle-length boots with two or three pairs of eyelets for lacing.[1]They are usually made from calfskin or suede,[1] although they have also been made from more exotic materials such as crocodile.[2] They were popular in the late 1940s and 1950s as casual wear.[3][4] The name chukka comes from the game of polo.[3] Chukka boots are similar to desert boots, worn by British forces in the Western Desert Campaign of World War II.[3][5] Desert boots are looser at the ankle than chukka boots and have a crepe sole.[4]


  18. 37
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Chuka, what a hypocritical shit you are.


  19. 38
    Tom says:

    Where do the 200,000 come from?
    Who are saying Brixton residents are up in arms?

    Brixton residents have said to me the event is a pile of old wank.

    Story out of thin air time. You need to try harder.


  20. 39
    Rupert my hero says:

    How many other Communist / Labour Councils will still spend Millions on these Communist style free events, when declaring they have to charge Old Age Pensioners for their care because of cutbacks. What is the difference between the Nazis and the Communists…. answer….. very little, the name mostly.
    How much money is Newham going to waste this year whilst cutting back on help for the aged, Socialist Promotion First, People Second. Carnival before Food, Spectacle and Entertainment before Care and Services.


  21. 41
  22. 42
    Some Geezer wot thinks everything for Chuka Umunna shouldn't be so free and easy says:

    I suppose the Lambeth Country Show people will tell Chuka Umanna off and do as they damn well pleasey…


  23. 43
    That's Mister Umunna to you, tory boy says:

    Chuka will be the next leader of the Labour Party.

    Chuka will be the next Prime Minister of Great Britain.

    Just wait and see…..


    • 48
      Director of Broadmoor (Care of the Clinically Insane) says:


      Nurse we have another escapee who’s managed to get access to the staff computer.

      You really must check that the straps on the strait-jacket are nice and tight.


    • 50
      JH says:

      Yes – except by then they’ll be calling it ‘Western Somalia’ as opposed to ‘Great Britain’.


  24. 44
    Brown's Shitstains says:

    ‘A rising star’? Labour is full of artificial politicians. All style and no substance. Chukus yer money can only damage the Labour Party. What is the point of Chuck?


  25. 49
    Tachybaptus says:

    It may be an eccentric mix of outdoor musical performances, sheep shearing, jousting and vegetable-growing, and it may be a waste of ratepayers’ money, but you can actually go to it if you feel the urge. Unlike the Olympics, for which taxpayers are paying through the nose but can’t get tickets for.

    (Not that I’d want to. When you’ve seen one lot of people running in circles, you’ve seen them all.)


  26. 51
    Gonk says:

    A country show without any field sports.


  27. 52
    Displaced Brummie says:

    What happened was, after years of enjoying the Country Show, the Labour councillors realised that the Country = Tory, so that they would have to withdraw all support for it.

    Chukka just, well, Chukka just is what he is, a fool in a suit.


  28. 53
    I'm not racist but... says:

    The court heard that some of the girls were raped and physically assaulted and some were forced to have sex with “several men in a day, several times a week”.

    The court was told that some of the defendants paid the girls and took payments from other men to whom they supplied the girls for sex.

    Kabeer Hassan, 24, Abdul Aziz, 41, Abdul Rauf, 43, Mohammed Sajid, 35, Adil Khan, 42, Abdul Qayyum, 43, Mohammed Amin, 44, Qamar Shahzad, 29, Liaquat Shah, 41, and Hamid Safi, 22, have all pleaded not guilty along with a 59-year-old man who cannot be named for legal reasons.


  29. 54
    ROFL says:


  30. 60
    Brown's Shitst@ins says:

    What a bunch of losers. Chukus yer money is not a rising star. He is sad little Bliarite -all style and no substance- who talks shite everytime he opens his mouth. He will never be Labour’s answer to Barak Obama, just a poor man’s version.
    I am so loving how Labour are making complete arses of themselves at the moment. They couldn’t run a TUCk shop. What a bunch of pathetic clowns.


  31. 61
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    The bird is rather fit though.


  32. 62
    • 64
      ToonBob... says:

      Men ‘plied girls with drink and drugs for sex’

      Beeb actually running the story.


      • 83
        albacore says:

        Curiouser and curiouser. Wonder who took the decision finally to allow the media to report this? Perhaps the bomb scare which emptied the court left Big Brother with no option.
        The MailOnline has the story in greater depth but can accept no comments “for legal reasons”.
        Can’t see any mention of the abuse being classed a hate crime, though, and, of course, most of the defendants are out on bail.


  33. 68
    Arthur Mullard says:

    Chuka is a chameleon-ie a reptile that can change its colour to blend in with its surroundings. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was actually white, but changed hue for career advantage.


  34. 71
    will says:

    between chukka and my MP in tooting Sadiq Khan they are both lawyers and greasey pole climbers who as lawyers took soft options employment law and immigration law and not proper law such as criminal or commercial


  35. 73
    Show Business for ugly people says:

    unreal and bizarrely selective moderation anyone?


  36. 74
    The beast of TRALEE says:

    tradiotional brixton events such as

    One man and his pitbull

    drive by clay pigeon shooting

    ganja bake off

    wreath arranging

    a “steal” band

    stab the vicar


  37. 84
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Chucka brick in it !


  38. 90
    Fish says:

    DP: Act 1, Scene 6.

    Loud noise of mobile phone interference thankfully interrupts Chukky rambling on.

    Brillo: Is your phone turned on Chucky?

    Chucky: (Indignantly) No. It’s not on.

    Brillo (disbelief)

    (Chucky surreptTITiously slips his hand in his jacket and turns phone off)

    Chucky conforms to the comlete manual of Socialist denial – day is night, black is white, on is off!


  39. 94
    geekparent says:

    He comes across as a children’s TV presenter in that video – but that’s the closest I’ve ever seen him get to a smile.


  40. 126
    Chukka Uppa says:

    NEWS: Lambeth Country Show proposed for 15 and 16 September 2012

    We are delighted to inform you that following a review of alternative dates the intention is for the Lambeth Country Show to take place over the weekend of the 15 and 16 September in Brockwell Park.

    We are now consulting on the format and arrangements and will provide more details shortly.

    Attached is a copy of the event report for the show and we would welcome your feedback on the proposed new dates for this year. The decision will be made after the consultation on the 19th March.

    Please do email your comments to the events team at events@lambeth.gov.uk

    We look forward to working with you soon,

    Yours sincerely,

    Lee Fiorentino
    Events Service Manager


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