February 1st, 2012

Gordon Brown Doesn’t Have A Clue

Usually the rule in politics is: don’t ask a question you do not know the answer to. It goes without saying that you do not ask a question when you have already been told the answer in writing. That would be a waste of time and money.

Gordon Brown MP has tabled a rare written parliamentary question about a constituency issue in a belated attempt to catch up on a growing concern of his electors. The written reply doesn’t convey the full contempt…

Radioactive Waste: Dalgety Bay

Mr Gordon Brown: To ask the Secretary of State for Defence with reference to his planned visit to Fife in the week of 30 January 2012, if he will visit the sites at Dalgety Bay now under scrutiny for radiation contamination.

Mr Robathan: I am, this day, at Dalgety Bay and am visiting these sites. My office notified the right hon. Member’s office of my visit on 19 January.

Gordon tabled the question on January 26. He isn’t really paying attention is he?


  1. 1
    Charlie says:

    Gordon needs locking up!

    demented fool.

  2. 2

    Brown = Toxic Waste !

  3. 3
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    So what a shock, Toenails just stated that Red Ed had Cameron on the back foot.

    Did I watch a different PMQ’s? Red Ed was fucking useless, a gormless bug eyed mong, he makes Ed Scrotum look smart.

  4. 4
    Tax Payer says:

    I suspect he knew little of either the question or the answer !

  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    what a fucking gimp

  6. 6
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:

    Talking of c*nts, any news on the other prize one, Huhne?

  7. 7
    For fuck's sake says:

    Brown is an utter, utter c unt.

  8. 8
    Brown should be sacked says:

    Brown’s so busy jetting off to Geneva and Las Vegas to hobnob with hedge fund traders that he can’t notice what is happening on the ground.

  9. 9

    How can little Ed stand there and call Cameron for his Government of millionaires
    When he himself presides over a shadow cabinet of millionaires ?
    and he say’s this as a tax evading parasite !

  10. 10
    Juffles the Cat says:

    Didn’t his PPS notice either?

  11. 11
    The Orifice of Gordon and Sarah Brown says:

    Gordon is too busy globe trotting on the bloated lecture circuit.

  12. 12
    Kered Ybretsae says:

    Right ‘orrible mumber, doesn’t pay attention, more like attention to his pay!!

  13. 13
    Deep fried Mili says:

    I quite enjoyed Cameron’s relentless pisstake of Miliband with his “Come on, one nod” line. Ed looked furious and some Labour wanker kept yelling “arrogant!” at Cameron.

  14. 14
    Sid The Pig says:

    Brown is like an open goal.

  15. 15
    Mystick1 says:

    Brown should resign his seat. He’s a bloody disgrace, swanning round the world lining his pockets with as much as he can grab. Unfit to be an MP.

  16. 16
    No2IT says:

    Reminds me of a story from the days of the Empire:

    Admiralty to HMS Victorious: “Proceed immediately to Singapore,”
    HMS Victorious to Admiralty: “I am at Singapore.”
    Admiralty to HMS Victorious: “Well, stay there.”

  17. 17
    Professor Henry Brubaker, Institute for Studies says:

    He needs hounding to an early grave and he should die knowing the contempt the british people have for his malign and woeful time in office.

  18. 18
    Nu Attack Dog says:

    what do you expect really?

  19. 19
    Piggy says:

    I was truly astonished at the humongous size of Labour’s Rosie Cooper. She’s seriously obese. I googled her and then realised I’ve heard of her before in notorious circumstances.


  20. 20
    ToonBob... says:

    Just another honest Labour mistake perhaps ?

  21. 21
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Best line was Cameron calling the Liebore front bench a vacuum, I think they are more empty than a vacuum.

  22. 22
  23. 23
    Steve Miliband says:

    Does that phone number work?

    Anyone still have one of those new fangled fax machines?

  24. 24
    Aaron D Highside says:

    Gordon, the gift that keeps on giving and giving and giving and….

  25. 25
    Tom Watson's Intern says:

    Is he still alive then?…

  26. 26
    Steve Miliband says:

    Bet Andrew Robathan was pleased to visit Gordon’s manor

  27. 27
    England nige says:

    Know better or worse than any other mp

    trayter’s all

  28. 28
    The last Quango in Paris says:

    Sorry but the people of Fife get what they deserve – if you vote for anyone in a red rosette this is what happens. Watch him step down at the next election to save any embarrassment when they slowly realise he is crap.

  29. 29
    It's stomach turning the way Sarah Brown flaunts her charity work every day. It's tasteless, crass and ostentatious says:

  30. 30
    SFG says:

    Bet the locals were astonished,
    They don’t normally see an MP save for election night, and probably have no clue what one does

  31. 31
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Was the question written in purple crayon?

  32. 32
    Anonymous says:

    Still taking our money.

    How about he’s stripped of a title or 2 given he gave £40billion to someone who is supposedly so evil he’s no longer a sir.

  33. 33
    Loungelizard says:

    He’s taken his eye off the Balls.

  34. 34
    nellnewman says:

    He’s too busy trying to sell himself abroad to take notice of constituency trivia.

  35. 35
    Cressida's Dick says:

    ‘Knock on the window and I’ll let you in but please don’t disturb Gordon as he will be licking it.’

  36. 36
    ToonBob... says:

    Time to save some money and stop sending billions in aid to India ?

  37. 37
    Gordon Brown MP says:

    In response to some rather tasteless comments here, I’m getting on with job of lining my pockets with cash and not representing my constitutents. It’s the right thing to do.

  38. 38
    fuck off BBC says:

    The BBC, combining a soviet method of subsidy and medieval style of punishment if you don’t pay up. Why since the fall of the Berlin wall has there been any need for a state funded broadcaster, expect perhaps in North Korea and Cuba? Why the fuck do we put up with it?

  39. 39
    ToonBob... says:

    Vacuous is certainly an appropriate word to describe them !

  40. 40
    AC1 says:

    Was in Davos begging for a job.

  41. 41
    AC1 says:

    People who read the grauniad need other people to subsidise their lifestyle.

  42. 42
    Afghanistan Banana Stand says:

    “Gordon Brown doesn’t have a clue”

    We know.

  43. 43
    May 2010 Election says:

    And Camoron missed.

  44. 44
    Gordon Brown says:

    My jobbies have became radioactive, it started in America.

  45. 45
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Hobnob? More likely chocolate fingers.

  46. 46
  47. 47
    Anon says:

    Too true. We give India £££ in aid, and India uses it to buy French fighter aircraft.

    Well done, Cameron. That was money well-spent.


  48. 48
    Le Beast says:

    She was “close” to Lord Smallcock
    No sex just doughnuts

  49. 49
    Raving Loon says:

    Gordon Brown: Where’s my phone?
    Sarah Brown: you’re holding it honey!
    Gordon Brown: wibble

  50. 50
    Gordon "Syd Barret" Brown says:

    I may not have a clue,
    but I’ve got a smelly poo,
    I’ll give it to you,
    if you’d like me to.

  51. 51
    Le Beast says:

    That would be 5 ways to get fatter and more of a closet dyke?
    How very modern

  52. 52
    nellnewman says:

    Could we send gordon instead do you think?

    2 for the price of 1 if he takes sarah?

    They could talk everybody to death then with his failed economics theories.

  53. 53
    Anonymous says:

    nell, master of the kecking obvious, has done it again.

  54. 54
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Charity = the resort for those unable to obtain value for their services.

  55. 55
    Gordon "Syd Barret" Brown says:

    I’ve got a poo,
    it’s a very smelly do,
    it’s brown and stinks and made me want to vom-it,
    I’d give it to you if I could,
    but I’ve swallowed it.

  56. 56
    void to vacuum, and vice versa says:

    Ed can suck all the air out of a room just by walking in.

  57. 57
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Oh Sarah yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

  58. 58
    The Rt[?] Hon[?] Gordon Brown MP (allegedly) says:

    You’re REALLY gonna visit Dalgety Bay, you’re not taking the piss? REALLY REALLY? Cross your heart and hope to die, knitting needle in your eye? You wouldn’t fool an old fool like me, would you? If you’re lying I’ll never talk to you again, so there!

  59. 59
    Fish says:

    Actually the Labour front bench looked like they wanted to hide.

  60. 60
    PJD says:

    It looks like you have misunderstood the exchange. It is obvious that Robathan told Brown he was visiting Fife earlier in January, but not whether he would be visiting the Dalgety Bay sites.

  61. 61
    Iloathlefties says:

    You wait and see. It won’t be “in the public interest to prosecute” or some such rubbish!! 10% of all our electric bills now pay for Huhn’s windmills and solar power based on unproven science. Outrageous, my heating is on full right now to combat that global warming!

  62. 62
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Gordon Brown’s parliamentry written questions are too far and too fast.

  63. 63
    Only in the Graun says:

    The leach that keeps on taking, more like.

  64. 64
    The Paragnostic says:

    It’s “leech”, not “leach”!

    Go and tow a line or whatever.

  65. 65
    Wilky says:

    Why should he start paying attention now, he’s managed to do OK out of us so far!

  66. 66
    The Paragnostic says:

    Random, undirected and you can’t get any useful work out of him?

  67. 67
    Only in the Graun says:

    Agreed. I’ll be astonished if this goes to court.

    Huhne is one of the favoured few. To well connected to be judged as you or I would be.

  68. 68
    David B says:

    Just like when he was in government. Not a clue what to do, so make it look like you are doing something

  69. 69
    Handlemycock says:

    Don’t you find doughnuts sexy?

  70. 70
    Sid The Pig says:

    Did I hear right the other day or was it just a fart in the wind that David Milbean was earning £21,000 a day by using a tax loophole his government said they would close?
    There are many multi millionaires’ on Labour benches that it beggars belief that Ed the Talking Horse even used the line of Tory millionaires.

  71. 71
    Desperate Dan says:

    Gordon Brown, International Man of Mystery.

  72. 72
    Johnny says says:

    If Fred gets his knighthood taken off him for being a shit banker what should Gordon lose for being a shit politician; His pension? His police protection?

  73. 73
    Sid The Pig says:

    LOL I like that gag.

  74. 74
    The (soon to be ex) Rt Hon Gordon Brown, Laird of Fife, Saviour of the World says:

    Yippy, Yippy, Yippy,
    I’ve done a Mister Whippy
    It’s warm and brown and slippy
    I think I’m going dippy!

  75. 75
    Only in the Graun says:

    You should write for the Guardian Nige. You have clearly mastered the house style.

  76. 76
    Only in the Graun says:

    All that fucking money and the tight bastard can’t afford a doorbell.

  77. 77
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:

    Sorry. I was never any good at numbers.

  78. 78
    Worth a read says:

  79. 79
    Only in the Graun says:

    I think you mean International Man of Misery.

  80. 80
    Only in the Graun says:


    Are they wearing some kind of alternative reality goggles or something?

  81. 81
    AC1 says:


    Nill point energie?

    perfect for muBand

  82. 82
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Gordon Brown: Where’s my phone?
    Sarah Brown: you’re holding it honey!

    Gordon Brown: Why?

  83. 83
    I wanna be - a pampered MP - money, sex and attention - are just right for me says:

    The irony is that this lamentable approach represents his high water mark of efficiency compared with when he was in office.

  84. 84
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    The old trick of throwing shit at your opponents to deflect attention from your own thieving property millionaire scum.

  85. 85
    Put Housing Benefit Claimants into Caravans says:

    Gordon should be made to repay the Labour debt personally, a few thousand years on the lecture circuit should do it. This would help pay for all the parasites and spongers he created with New Liebour.

  86. 86
    Desperate Dan says:

    I can’t make up my mind what the punishment should be for sanctimonious MPs like LibDems Cable, Clegg and Oakshott who receive funds from fraudsters like Michael Brown. MR Oakshott has a nice ring to it and the other two chould be cast into the outer darkness. They could also be made to write 10,000 times “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone”.

  87. 87
    Really? says:

    Their reality has been framed by the BBC.

  88. 88
    Maximus says:

    Champagne socialists need their sham pain news for ‘balance’.

  89. 89
    Desperate Dan says:

    The BBC are so monumentally dishonest that they are broadcasting a clip of Ed making his Davos remark but leaving out Dave’s brilliantly witty reply. They must have the Labour spin team doing their editing for them.

  90. 90
    Leyton from the Orient says:

    Gordon Brown was in Government for 13 years due to the ineptitude and greed of the British public.

    During all of this time he did not have a clue and now the penny drops!

    You will be telling us next Diane Abbot is brain dead.

  91. 91
    Maximus says:

    Lost his reason a long time ago. Still has his shoes tho.

  92. 92
    Leyton from the Orient says:

    If I ever had to work for Lord Oakshit I think I would resign on the spot .

    Able and Clegg are both bloody useless as well but at least you can have a joke with them.

  93. 93
    Albert Hall says:

    Now that is useful, Brown isn’t.

  94. 94
    Leyton from the Orient says:

    The longer Brown stays an MP the more respect I have for Tony Blair who did the honourable thing by going for a long walk on a short (but extendable) plank.

  95. 95
    Thomas from Tonna says:

    Does this mean I will be able to make a claim for 13 years of neglect when the Republic of England is formed?

  96. 96

    Hey, lay off Gordon! It is not his fault that they don’t let him receive mail in the insane asylum.

  97. 97
    Tant pis! says:

    You just can’t get the staff these days….

  98. 98
    Leyton from the Orient says:

    Ich bin ein Berliner.

  99. 99
    \The late Dean Martin says:

    Spurs fans will now need to learn a new song which goes:

    When the ball hits your head
    As you sit in row Z
    That’s Zamora.

    I’m sure you’ll recognise the tune.

  100. 100
    A Labour numpty who is glowing in the dark says:

    Oor bairn born last week has twelve fingers and twenty toes and a head that looks like an alien. God Bless ya, Gordon Brown.

  101. 101
    Tony Bliar is really not a nice person says:

    Thought he was going to devote the rest of his life to charity work and teaching………..Must have misunderstood him when he said it, silly me……..

  102. 102
    Tony Bliar is really not a nice person says:

    hypocrites the F.U.C.K.I.N lot of them……….The further left in their way of thinking the bigger the hypocrite……….

  103. 103
    B Fuddled says:

    I posted my Christmas cards on 1 December. The one to my son arrived today. Must have gone via Australia!

  104. 104
    D Fatbott says:

    See, it’s not just me that dozes off. It’s what we do.

  105. 105
    I hate Blue Labour says:

    The twit that keeps on taking.

  106. 106
    Anonymous says:

    I think that message is actually for Gordon

  107. 107
    Katya says:

    Yes that is exactly how it looks.

  108. 108
    Gripper Stebson says:

    What a dooshe bag, Back to your rocking chair you useless twat

  109. 109
    brian says:


  110. 110
    Mad Jock McMad says:

    Apparently the Minister to one look at the radioactive mess left by the RN in 1963 in big holes in the ground around Dalgety Bay and said ‘it wisnae me, it wis yon big Brown job that did it, he should pay to clear it up.

    In the mean time a three headed ginormous plaice ate the Minister’s bodyguards which the Minister instantly put down to a freak result and haggis poisoning in the Firth of Forth.

    Next up – why an independent Scotland should pay the MoD to look after Trident for it …….

  111. 111
    Jimmy says:

    “My office notified the right hon. Member’s office of my visit on 19 January.”

    To be fair, getting Letwin to deliver the letter may have been a mistake.

  112. 112
    Pundit Too says:

    The people in Kilkaldy only believe that there is a Labour Party to vote for in a one party state. How on earth can you believe there is any other reason to vote for him and keep him on the public purse. However I am sure the SNP having his seat as a high priority target.

  113. 113
    Pundit Too says:

    Toenails is in full left wing spate. Could he be seeking a future job with his Labour friends when the crunch comes at the BBC in 2013?

  114. 114
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Expecting Gordon Brown to be able to read it would be an even bigger one.

  115. 115
    Rabbit Angstrom says:

    MuBand! Lol

  116. 116
    Anonymous says:

    What I posted on FB regarding Broon:
    People of Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath constituency. Did you know that Gordon Brown, Labour MP for the said constituency, is paid nearly £100,000 a year to represent you in the House of Commons. Are you aware that in the last year, he has represented us in the House of Commons TWICE? Yes, he has decided to turn up for work twice in a year. One of those times was a personal issue to him, regarding the News of the World affair. Therefore, to represent us ONCE in a year has cost £100,000 ish. Is he worth all that? This constituency is suffering. You won’t hear a bad word against him in the Fife Free Press, Central Fife Times, Glenrothes Gazzete, or indeed the East Fife Mail. The Fife Free Press group should hang their heads in shame, as they are politically biased. Democratic? Hah. The chief editor is a good friend of Gordon Brown, and his editorial is blinkered because of this. Any time you write to the paper, or respond to it’s news stories, and it regards Brown, your comments are deleted. It seems he has had a word with the FFP as he did with the Courier regarding anything against him. The Fife Free Press, representing Kirkcaldy should be asking him why he is not representing his constituency, and still being paid to do so. Rather this than him calling the tune. So, despite the Fife Free Press’ censoring to protect Brown, I thought I’d let you good people know through social media. As to the FFP, I know you will probably read this too, hang your heads in shame. The censorship just makes us more determined to inform the people of Fife about this ridiculous situation, be it social media, word of mouth, or leafleting. Our voice will be heard.

    Trouble with the people of my constituency is that they would vote for a scabby dug if it wore a red rosette. Wake up Kirkcaldy and Cowdenbeath, dump this bufoon!

  117. 117
    Conrad says:

    Making it illegal for UK companies to bribe foreigners whilst the French are free to carry on didn’t help.

  118. 118
    Jimmy says:

    You should hear what they’re saying on Bebo.

  119. 119
    Archie says:

    Even the “Any Questions?” audience booed the mere mention of Gordon’s name a couple of months back! Never thought I’d see the day!

  120. 120
    Anonymous says:

    The one eyed scottish idiot strikes again.

  121. 121
    brian kelly says:

    He is – it’s his and his wife’s charity

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