January 27th, 2012

Picking up the Penny

Guido won’t bother with the fashion round up this time, but devout nicotine addict Laurie Penny popped up on our television again this lunchtime, complete with a fake cigarette. Jackie Ashley had dropped out at the last minute from appearing on the Daily Politics, so our favourite flame-haired firebrand was called up to fill in. In the course of the interview she offered her services as chairman of RBS, declaring that she could do Hester’s job without the paycheck. Guido is sceptical…

Leaving aside the differences between turning around an enormous multinational financial institution and jetting around teenage trouble-spots with a smartphone, let’s just see what Penny’s comrades at the Occupy movement could teach us about running a bank:

“Following criticism of the way in which the camp’s financial affairs have been run, the finance group quit en masse. That included the person who has the key for the safe — with the result that no one could access the money. Coupled with the fact that donations are now lagging behind expenditure, there has been a serious shortage of money to pay for things such as food and power. Protester Leo Ashford, 20, …told reporters that despite generous donations by supporters, money had been squandered. ‘We’re protesting against bankers, and no one on our finance team knows how to use a ledger or a receipt,’ he said.‘In the second week we had public opinion on our side and enough donations to sustain ourselves. We all could have had brand-new tents and blow-up mattresses. Now no one knows where the money has gone. ‘I’m sad, but I knew a month ago that it would get to the point where we would collapse in on ourselves on essentially our own stupidity.’”

Watching the Penny, you better hope the pounds could look after themselves.

Video via @LiarPoliticians

300 Comments

  1. 1
    Normal person says:

    She , like Polly are great adverts for the looney left!

    Like

    • 3
      Penny Farthing says:

      I wish the Penny would drop.

      Like

      • 24
        Olympic Nursie says:

        I wonder if the nursie parade should include some coffins to represent the hundreds and hundreds (and that’s quite a lot, apparently) of elderly who die each year in our hospitals from neglect, thirst and starvation?

        Like

        • 34
          genghiz the kahn says:

          Who is going to design the uniforms?

          Synchronised stripping nurses on subscriptions might be the only way to get the London Olympics to break even, and to make some happy men very old.

          Like

        • 212
          Ivor Tapeworm says:

          Under this banker’s management, the amount of taxpayers money that is at risk has been reduced by billions and billions, despite very difficult economic conditions.

          The people who are instead focusing on this banker’s bonus are utterly myopic.

          These squawking idiots are the sort who, when choosing an investment product, are so financially illiterate they are swayed by a free pen.

          Like

          • smoggie says:

            Politics of Envy and public-school educated Penny is at the forefront.

            Sparking fags is a feeble attempt to look “of the streets”.

            Like

          • Simpsons geek says:

            The silly cow with the fake cigarette is trying to look like one of crusty the clowns old talk show clips

            Like

          • Mr Slater says:

            “Squawking idiots”…? I do hope, Sir, that you are not referring to Parrots!

            Like

    • 36
      M says:

      Is it just me but did the protest camps financial situation Something they learned from RBS

      Like

      • 39
        M says:

        Was the protest camp formally running RBS

        Like

        • 96
          Ivor Tapeworm says:

          Keep trying, M, and you might eventually come up with an intelligible sentence.

          Like

          • My Lord Prizeclot, LieBore Apologist and Illumination, critiquing current affairs says:

            Intelli . . . intel . . . . fock me I’ll give you that whatsitsname and me with no a levels stuffed up pop squeaks they can serve emslevs for all I care do this do that on board the boat did they think I was a waIter or somat solved the cod war me and all by meself on a heaving deck pier me just fer Pauline so she could admire me furry bits but as I say to all the birds you can bang yer fenders agin me uprights all yer like . . phwooar look at that! . . . oh bugger its gone out of sight . . anyone got a sandwich . . ? . . . pie . . ? . . patsy . . ?

            Like

      • 41
        jgm2 says:

        Sounds like they learned it From Gordon Brown and Toxic Ned.

        Like

      • 126
        smoggie says:

        yeah it’s just you.

        Like

      • 195
        Grumpy Old Man says:

        It’s just another Leftie enterprise that ran out of other people’s money. Fiscal incontinence is in Socialist’s DNA.

        Like

    • 203
      Houghda Thunquit says:

      Expenditure ahead of donations

      It should be the official slogan of the left

      Like

    • 207
      Fenton says:

      She could perhaps turn the bank into a “creative space” where everyone can have a damn good shout. That will sort out the finances.

      Like

      • 300
        Jay says:

        It won’t be rperesentative because in my local experience in Hackney only 5% of Labour activists read blogs, and my wider guess is that people who support the leadership tend not to read LabourHome because it publishes crap like this.

        Like

  2. 2
    Hugh Janus says:

    What a silly, empty-headed socialist bimbo.

    Like

    • 100
      Ivor Tapeworm says:

      The socialist bimbo epitomises one of the roots of this county’s problems. The complete financial illiteracy of the great unwashed, their gullibility when looking for scapegoats, and their ability to shoot themselves continually in the foot when presented with a rare banker who is actually trying, and probably able, to make things better for the taxpayer.

      It makes me laugh, though, when people go on about the Government owning some banks. The real problem is that the other banks own the Governments, past and present.

      Like

      • 129
        AC1 says:

        So what’s wrong with using the leaf as currency???

        Like

        • 141
          Ivanna Moneytree says:

          Isn’t that what we do already ? Not gold leaf, of course, because we abandonned the gold standard long ago (and Gordon gave away all the gold to his rich ‘friends’). The stuff we get to use just withers away, and, come the spring, anything we do have left gets devalued as a new load of currency floods the system.

          Like

        • 142
          Are u avin a larf says:

          Good idea.
          No shortage of places to cash them in …. branches everywhere.

          Like

          • Aunty Millicent says:

            Oh goodness me. I have just twigged what you are all on about. It’s Labour barking up the wrong tree isn’t it? Isn’t it?

            Like

  3. 4
    Terrible But True says:

    How does the New Statesman manage to produce any content to warrant its vast ABC figures, as its entire staff seem permanent fixtures across the BBC dawn to dusk, doubtless acting to ‘speak for the nation’ as our most trusted national broadcaster would like to, but needs at least one degree of separation (via ideological chums invited on) to cover with deniability.

    Will fellow #Occupy stooge and PR pro-bono contributor Mr. Mason be Humberting a couple of times around the Newsnight studios later?

    Like

  4. 5
    Over Exposed says:

    Don’t knock it. The more Looney Left there are on the telly the better.

    Like

  5. 6
    Anon says:

    I’ve seen the future, and I bloody well hope it isn’t orange.

    Like

  6. 7
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Is this the same journalist who didn’t want to pay an intern?

    Like

  7. 8
    Michael G says:

    Are you sure that she ready to take the 11+? Maybe another year or two ….?

    Like

  8. 9
    Loungelizard says:

    I’ve just speed viewed this on the I player, now we know why he’s called Brillosconi, only the string vest was missing. What a sad tart the girl is and for the duration of this program, Brillo as well.

    Like

  9. 11
    Not looneys, and not left: well paid businesswomen says:

    Toynbee left? She’s a washed up liberal, paid to write endless variation of the same screed about how the Banker’s and Business Party (labour) would’ve thrown more crumbs to the less well off than the other Bankers and Business Party currently in office.

    As for ‘Penny Red’…an opportunist ‘radical’ who will be writing Toynbee’s articles when she carks it.

    Like

    • 78
      sir humphrey says:

      i wonder if they believe what they write themselves. i mean there is an appetite for it. i enjoy reading the express when it has it’s once a month ‘blizzards about to shut down uk’ articles. i sort of suspend disbelief and enjoy the fun.

      both polly and laurie are blue-bloods without any idea how poor people actually live but i suppose middle class people in expensive houses read their drivel nod and feel good about themselves. sort of buying indulgences but on the cheap (how much is the guardian these days?)

      Like

    • 113
      Jackie Ashley says:

      Excuse me!

      There’s a queue!

      Like

  10. 12
    Urine Specimen says:

    Like

  11. 13
    annette curton says:

    “We could all have had brand new tents and blow-up mattresses”, I could not possibly attempt to unravel the ramifications of that comment.

    Like

  12. 15
    Anonymous says:

    Why the fuck do these young people think they know fucking everything about anything? Who keeps letting these fucking young Hunts on TV and onto the political scene. They know absolutely fuck all.

    Like

    • 21
      joescotus says:

      nailed it in one.

      Like

      • 161
        Revd. Phoney B£iar, deeply spiritual person, champonioning the yoof says:

        Hi!

        I appealed to the young because I’m ‘hip’ and I gave them the self confidence to say ‘Hey – I can do anything’ – a bit like me really!

        I appealed to the middle years, – because they recognised a fellow traveller who could sense their aspirations, – and I got them to believe ‘Hey, – I can do anything’.

        And I appealed to the elderly, because they recognised I cared, and they gave me their support and votes, and hey, you know what? – I got them to believe ‘Hey, – I can do anything’.

        And you know, I’m VERY wealthy, – and yes I can do anything!

        Like

    • 56
      Can you type with two fingers? says:

      They may be young, they may know very little, they may even have strange ideas about life. But they have opinions galore, and the lefties will pay handsomely to hear them.

      Like

      • 68
        Tessa Tickles says:

        “But they have opinions galore, and the lefties will pay handsomely to hear them.”

        Mugs. I just hang around here and read opinions for free.

        Like

      • 70
        Anonymous says:

        Just sick of it. She looks like she is in her mid-20s. Her arrogance knows no bounds. Just sick to the back teeth of their hypocrisy and idiocy.

        What happened to life experience? What has vast knowledge she must have accumulated during her 25 years on this planet.

        Like

      • 127
        The Central Scrutinizer says:

        But they have had those opinions handed to them on a plate.

        Too many late nights reading Noam Chomsky…. and believing every sodding word!

        Like

        • 134
          AC1 says:

          Who’s done fuck all of any use at all.

          Like

          • It's the same old wheeze says:

            She’s part of the marketing department of Socialist inc. ….recruit the naive and/or narcissitic young to keep the gravy train rolling for the party. ie She’s a useful idiot deployed to lure other useful idiots to keep the lefty show on the road.

            Like

      • 233
        Anonymous says:

        Not all young people are that stupid.

        Like

    • 299
      Owen Jones says:

      Ah yew tawken abehwt me, lahk?

      Like

  13. 18
    A Message from the sponsers. says:

    Like

    • 57

      Why didn’t I go to the Interview when they asked!

      A colleague said the day before “You really want to work at Ann Summers? you’ll be one of only about 5 blokes among 2,000 staff. hanging around all those 18-25 shop managers and staff. Working round stores looking at sexy women and examining sexy lingerie? It’ll be like a Carry On film. You’ll wank yourself to death in a week Q.”

      So I never went to the interview.. Which pleased the wife. But sometimes one thinks back to missed opportunities…”

      Like

      • 73
        Tessa Tickles says:

        “The worst thing in life is a missed opportunity.” – Woody Allen.

        That and perhaps getting a brain tumour.

        Like

      • 132
        Rub-a-dub-dub says:

        I took my wife into an Ann Summers the other day. I plonked her in front of the vibrators and told her to take a look and pick one out. After a couple of minutes she said she’d found one. I asked her to point it out…

        “That one.” She said..and pointed

        “Which one.” I said..

        “That one. The tartan one with the white top”.

        “That’s not a vibrator. Thats the guy who works here’s flask”….

        Like

  14. 19
    Anonymous says:

    Where are Brillo’s wrinkles?

    He’s orange as well.

    Like

  15. 20
    Clapham omnibus passenger says:

    No-one is mentioning Fred the Shred and what he is receiving for doing zilch and his past “success” and services to banking. At least Hester turns up for work and is demonstrably turning this failed business around. We might even be able to flog the thing eventually and get something back.

    So this ashtray thinks she has the skill and intellect to look after the nation’s investment without pissing it all up the wall like Sir Fred and his jock chums, McRuin and Darling? Her brain is clearly fried.

    The BBC and Guardian are curiously quiet about the vanishingly small level of tax paid by enterprises run by ex-Minsters and ex-PMs. Bankers must pay!! Blink. Blink.

    Like

    • 27
      Ahem says:

      Socialists always run out of other people’s money in the end

      Like

    • 32
      Expat Geordie says:

      Had fun at work over this one today. Was telling some of the comrades in the office that is is good to have a “white” man running RBS so well instead of a Jock. They definitely turn a shade of not white after that one.

      Like

      • 49
        jgm2 says:

        Whenever I get a woman’s name wrong I always excuse myself with ‘All you white women look the same to me’.

        That’s generally good for a laugh.

        Like

    • 164
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      I will bet serious money that Penny Dreadful does not know the difference between an account in debit or credit

      Like

  16. 25
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    ‘… turning around an enormous multinational financial institution…’

    You’re having a laugh surely.

    Like

  17. 26
    Dr Evil says:

    Would that be Penny Dreadful?

    Like

  18. 28
    Moooneo says:

    If she tried really really hard she could be more ridiculous. I do mean really hard though.

    Really really really hard.

    Really really…….. well you get the point!

    Like

  19. 29
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Where are Brillo’s wrinkles?

    Like

  20. 30
    Another Engineer says:

    The occupy people will need Arctic expedition equipment very shortly. I doubt they’ll last long when it hits -10C and below towards the end of next week.

    The end is nigh.

    Like

    • 64
      labourunionsbbc we are one says:

      Why don’t they occupy the olimpic site, that represents a lot of bonus’s, and all for a two week nightmare.

      Like

    • 137
      AC1 says:

      The grauniad have said it might be the warmest winter evar!

      Maybe they’re the only ones who can afford to have the heating on?

      Like

      • 173
        Another Engineer says:

        Quite likely. I’m sure they’ve got plenty of left-over copies to feed into their biomass boiler.

        I’m relying on current numerical model output, mind, but it does look like there’s an east wind coming…and a bitter one too.

        Like

        • 187
          AC1 says:

          Oh come now, these “experts” have got around the impossible mathematical problem of exponential error in recursive computer models…

          What are we mortals to doubt their amazing foresight??

          Like

          • The Paragnostic says:

            Not necessarily recursive, just any discrete model of a system with nonlinear feedback. Incrementally applied, but not recursive (or tail-recursive at least unless you have an infinite stack…)

            But yeah.

            Like

          • AC1 says:

            I use recursion as a word describing the use of outputs becoming inputs. You use the term feedback instead.

            Any emulation of nature with both errors in measurement and model will be subject to vast amounts of error. The only thing keeping this error from being far more apparent is the one thing AGW scammers deny, that the climate is not balanced on a knife-edge.

            Like

  21. 31
    Horrible Racquet says:

    I could do Andy Murray’s job and lose a tennis match. Pay me in Scotch eggs.

    Like

  22. 33
    An anti-colonialist says:

    Guido

    I see you are supporting the agenda of AIPAC by promoting articles by Simone D. Hartmann

    “NEAR EAST REPORT INTERVIEWS AUSTRIAN ACTIVIST SIMONE D. HARTMANN

    AMERICAN ISRAEL PUBLIC AFFAIRS COMMITTEE

    April 1, 2008

    Simone Dinah Hartmann is the spokeswoman for the Austrian coalition STOP THE BOMB.

    Near East Report: What is STOP THE BOMB?

    Simone Dinah Hartmann: STOP THE BOMB is a coalition of diverse individuals who believe that the Iranian nuclear program poses a threat to Israel and the whole world. It was founded in Austria last autumn. Among us are intellectuals and artists, students and retirees, human rights activists and Iranian dissidents from very different political backgrounds.

    Noone would ever have heard of this lady if she was not promoted by AIPAC (who purchase the leading Presidential candidates in the US)

    Are you promoting war with Iran ?

    Like

  23. 35
    nellnewman says:

    Oh dear. It couldn’t be said that she’s a penny short of a pound by any chance, could it?

    Like

  24. 45
    jgm2 says:

    OT Jackass Straw desperate for more opportunities to fuck more things up…

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-16756292

    Jack Straw has said there is so little government legislation for MPs to consider at the moment that ministers are having to “manufacture activity”.

    Like

    • 51
      I don't need no doctor says:

      Is that like Blair, Straw and the other cronies manufactured the Iraq WMDs. Straw is a shyster of the highest order.

      Like

      • 65
        sir humphrey says:

        Jack “white flight” Straw should live in the squalor of his constituency like his constituents have to

        Like

    • 82
      Tessa Tickles says:

      Since they’ve apparently got SFA to do, why don’t they close Parliament for a month (permanently would be better..) and not claim wages and expenses. Turn off the lights and the heating. Shut the kitchens. Claim a reduction on the insurance.

      In short, save us some money? Or aren’t we “all in this together” after all?

      Like

    • 98
      Cynical-old-bag says:

      Enter Millitwit.

      Like

    • 210
      Sherlock says:

      Makes a nice change from the labour years when they introduced over 3,000 new pieces of legislation.

      Like

      • 265
        Archer Karcher says:

        Straw is just pining for the “good old days” when the government shat out EU regulations by the bucket load. Perhaps that’s why Ed Miliband is so contorted about chocolate oranges and the desperate need to legislate against them, he’s like a bored teenager with nothing better to do.

        Like

  25. 46
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    Odd….I watched the video clip with the sound off. I thought they were discussing a new, slimline vibrator????

    Like

  26. 48
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Yet again Guido nicks my comments. I’ve been commenting since Penny was on the DP show. Behind the curve!

    Like

  27. 50
    Should I be ashamed? says:

    First time I’ve seen her on TV. Thought she was quite fit.

    Like

  28. 52
    WerdnaRetral says:

    Does anyone else think that The Labour Party constantly wheeling out this naive kid (Laurie Penny) to fight for them has the strong whiff of how the Third Reich eventually were forced to get the Hitler Youth to fight for them in 1945…. Desperate stuff…

    Like

    • 61
      Desperate Dan says:

      You’re right. Well spotted. They’ve got another one called Something Jones who serves the same purpose when Penny isn’t available. They are both an insult to the majority of young people whose voices are never heard but who are mostly funny, loveable, affectionate, thoughtful, hard-working, intelligent, helpful, assets to the country and brilliant company.

      Like

    • 62
      The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

      Sadly some of the “youth” still kept fighting after the final whistle in May 1945. My late father recounted a story of a British sentry in Hamburg during the summer of ’45 who had to “deal” with a 14 year old bastard who tried to stab him “for the Fatherland”.

      Regular searches of houses often revealed weapons being hoarded by the HJ.

      The silly sods didn’t know when they were beaten.

      Like

      • 67
        sir humphrey says:

        they won though didn’t they. germany is a rich place for germans, england is a shit-hole full of foreigners

        Like

      • 76

        SS and HJ were regularly shot by Allied troops. They wouldn’t surrender.
        One soldier, badly wounded in Normandy, was being treated when he took off all the bandages and refused to be administered too by ‘Ami’ Doktors!

        “you will die,” said the medic.

        “better to die than to let American drugss infect me.”

        One of the other wounded German Infantry said

        “let the tosser die. He’s been banging on like this for months. Who do you think shot him in the first place. The annoying little prick.”

        Like

        • 115
          Alizee la beast de paris says:

          Grandpa beast had a similar experience
          He watched a wood being btf by artillery for a week

          They (HJ) wouldnt surrender so they had to go in and fight close up
          A horrible thing

          Like

          • Really? says:

            HJ = Hitler Jugend = Hitler Youth.

            There are still a few around, even today. Ask them point blank and they will deny they were ever Nazis; ‘all the kids had to join’, their families got extra rations… Never any suggestion that they were brainwashed automata, programmed to defend the ‘Fatherland’ to their dying breath.

            Like

          • Pope Benedict XVI says:

            I couldn’t possibly comment.

            Like

    • 69

      But what else would she do?

      Thank you for your application to be head of the World bank.
      Unfortunately a degree in Marxist-Lenninist-central control planning and ‘experience of the truth of the streets’ are not the qualifications that we recognise.

      Although we understand that “A liberal viewpoint” and wanting “an end to global poverty” are admirable qualities, we were really seeking some experience of managing a FTSE100 company, relevant multi-national organisation with several hundred thousand employees or even involvement in a financial capacity as head of a large investment bank with turnovers in excess of $100,000,000 trillion.

      Employing an intern to help your write daily column is, unfortunately, not sufficient.

      If, in the future, you do happen to become head of a global charity, oil company, or financial institution, then please do not hesitate to reapply.

      yours sincerely,
      Someone with very many letters after their name that were for MA’s & Phd’s that actually mean something.

      PS – if you can also forward this letter onto Gordon Brown, that would save us a stamp

      Like

    • 145
      AC1 says:

      Penny on the 88mm ?

      Like

  29. 59
    Desperate Dan says:

    Criticism of Laurie Penny is verboten on the BBC. They encourage her to give it out but the snivelling little coward has to be protected from all negative vibes.

    Like

    • 268
      WeightWatchers Rep says:

      It’s the same on here!

      I had my post deleted for suggesting the the blessed Laurie could afford to lose a few kilos.

      Like

  30. 60
    A tank????? says:

    Like

  31. 75
    Jimmy says:

    Your being unfair on the Occupy crowd. They have no qualifications or experience in finance. It would be like putting someone who used to fold towels in Selfridges in charge of the economy.

    Like

    • 83

      Thing is J.
      Occupy protesters know how to occupy a tent, but not how to run an international financial Institution with 50,000+ staff worldwide, and a turnover in the $trillions.

      Whereas Mr Hester knows how to do both.

      Like

    • 86
      Anonymous says:

      They should try occupying a fucking vacancy in the job market.

      Like

    • 89
      Tessa Tickles says:

      “They have no qualifications or experience in finance.”

      Jimmy. Sweetheart. How many qualifications does one need, or experience in finance must one have, to balance the books, when all you’re doing is living in a tent?

      These are the people who think they can run the country, if not the world. All they had to do was buy baked beans, matches, camping-gaz and (hopefully) soap. And they managed to bugger it up.

      Like

    • 93
      Perse O'Nally says:

      Just for once Jimmy, you’re right…they know fuck all.

      Like

      • 109
        Anonymous says:

        They know how to get other people to pay for them, that puts them on par with those in troughminster (i.e. one brain cell less than it takes to beat farmers with a modern military.)

        Like

    • 118
      Alizee la beast de paris says:

      +1
      hehehh

      Or polishing Norman Lamonts toecaps with your tongue

      Like

    • 139
      The Central Scrutinizer says:

      Remember….. Labour think that the person who folds towels in Selfridges should be on the remuneration committee for the board of directors. The fact that they are only qualified to fold towels means nothing. Fairness! Social injustice. Equality….!

      Why dont we have the Selfriges towel folder as Speaker of the House?

      Oh hang on…. we have.

      Like

    • 150
    • 178
      jgm2 says:

      Such snobbery. Demeaning shop workers like that.

      The true face of Labour.

      Like

  32. 87
    Ed Milliband says:

    Penny Who? Let me tell you that I am the only 100% genuine opportunistic snivelling little shit around here.

    Like

  33. 94
    Adolf the cuddly bear says:

    Guido…..you fancy her it’s so blatantly obvious.
    And yes, so would I…..first.

    Like

  34. 99
    Photoshop says:

    Caption competition

    Who does this guy remind you of

    http://news.sky.com/home/uk-news/article/16157826

    I think we should be told

    Like

  35. 114
    Your Fat-Fuck Landlord says:

    I’m outta here. Play together nicely children.

    Like

  36. 116
    Ed μband says:

    I can solve a chocolate orange in 90 seconds.

    Like

  37. 117
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Am i right in thinking that Stephen Hester was appointed by LABOUR ?
    and his pay and bonuses Agreed by LABOUR ?
    So can somebody please tell Little Ed that His Party LABOUR
    put him there and did nothing about his 2 Million pounds a year Bonus that his lot paid him
    His wikipedia page says on top of his 1.2 Million salary he takes home 7.7 million in bonus and pension payouts , once again agreed by LABOUR !

    Like

    • 122
      Fabians are Evil says:

      Yes Stephen Hester was recruited by Gordon Brown and Darling to sort out the bank and protect the British tax payer.

      He came from from a very successful PLC and was given a CONTRACT with, as is usual, the potential to earn a bonus linked to performance.

      So the poor bugger does a good job and is in line to receive a share bonus – as per his contract.

      I hate all this class warfare being vomited by the left – if they TRULY want to go after the non-performing rich; to expose the mega earners who profit directly from the working man how about taking aim at the premier league footballers? Or their lefty chums in the BBC?

      Like

      • 133
        Tessa Tickles says:

        “Bently dryvers r well stupid scum. we shood hang um. unless there Waine Roonee. Hes well gud he is. he urns his muhnee he dus. i luv im.

        Y r footy tikkets so expensiv? its not rite. i blame fatchur.”

        Like

        • 140
          MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

          Sky news are giving it lagre all fecking day about how wrong it is special programmes on it “What Price a Banker”funny thing is joe public as expected think it’s wrong but most of the professionals they get on fully support it
          i on the other hand have no choice as all my fucking money was tied up in RBS shares So he has to turn it round for me LoL

          Like

      • 153
        AC1 says:

        You want to take aim at a business where the vast majority of turnover goes on the staff???

        If you want to take aim look towards those who’ve profited from “helpful” changes in planning permission, that’s basically free money equivalent to a privately collected tax.

        Like

        • 158
          MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

          Not forgetting government ministers who are directors of companies that benifit from multi million government contracts !
          absolutly no conflict of interest there then

          move along nothing to see here !

          Like

  38. 121
    Penny Dreadful says:

    The words brewery, organise and pissup come to mind.

    Like

    • 130
      Tessa Tickles says:

      She’ll grow up and stop supporting Labour once she turns 23.

      Either that or she’s doomed to endure a wasted life as Pollytwaddle II.

      Like

      • 149
        Penny Dreadful says:

        I notice you like action films. Starship Troopers on bbc1 tonight is a hoot.

        Like

        • 156
          AC1 says:

          I like both the book and the film. I think the book would make a good film too. :)

          Like

        • 162
          Tessa Tickles says:

          It is a very entertaining film, excellent comic-book stuff, although I suspect the BBC will edit the crap out of it.

          I note from IMDB.com that there were sequels II and III (and, good lord, a series), but I’ve only seen the first film.

          Like

  39. 128
    Gordon Brown says:

    I wanted Heston, not Hester, to cook the books at RBS.

    Like

  40. 138
    Anonymous says:

    The occupy movement don’t seem to be any good at anything, they can’t even make a camp fire with setiting fire to all the tents

    http://www.theargus.co.uk/news/9417218.Fire_at_Occupy_Brighton_camp/?ref=rss

    A fire broke out at the Occupy Brighton camp tongiht.

    A tent caught alight at the camp in Victoria Gardens at 5.50pm.

    Firefighters from Preston Circus attended the blaze which a Sussex Police spokesman said was believed to have been caused accidentally.

    He said: “It is believed they were burning pallets and it got out of hand.

    Like

  41. 146
    Nina says:

    Tedious Labour. They signed off on his pay deal, so have no reason to gripe now. The whole point, as I recall, was to give the man small basic pay and the rest in bonuses to give him some incentive to get off his rear and perform.

    Like

  42. 151
    Johann Hari says:

    Laurie Penny, one of the best, is not incompetent.

    Like

  43. 154
    Labour hypocrisy says:

    When they were in power, Labour said they were very comfortable about people becoming filthy rich. Cameron should repeát that week in week out at PMQs.

    Like

    • 167
      Tessa Tickles says:

      Labour are also, judging by Chukup Umunna’s recent shenanigans, pretty comfortable about tax avoidance, too.

      And then there are his tailor-made suits from Rupert St. A couple of grand each.

      “Vote for us. We can relate to the workers. Yeah.”

      Like

  44. 159
    Redknapp reveals a bit about his private life says:

    Redknapp told the court today he’s a giver, not a taker.
    :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D

    Like

  45. 166
    Penny Dreadful says:

    In fairness to the bbc, they always show post-watershed films uncut. It was in the 80s and 90s they regularly butchered films. ITV1 is still one of the worst culprits when it comes to cutting films. I’ve even seen films shown after midnight be censored to bits. Some of ITV’s edited versions have become legend. The best known one was when they showed a heavily sanitised Die Hard in which John McClane tells the bad guys “Yippi-kai-ai kemosabe”. And in Lethal Weapon, Mel Gibson vows to “get those motherfunsters”.

    Like

    • 169
      Tessa Tickles says:

      Yes! I remember “yippee-ki-yay kemosabe”

      This is one of the reasons I don’t have a TV: the pissing license fee and the fact the BBC treat everyone like a child. After they’ve taken our fucking money.

      Two reasons.

      Anyway, you have just decided tonight’s viewing, as we have DH on DVD. (laptop->projector->wall).

      Ta!

      Like

  46. 172
    Tessa Tickles says:

    “Lawyers can seek volunteers to help ‘locked-in’ man die: Lawyers for a man with “locked-in syndrome” have been given the approval to actively seek out volunteers to assist him to commit suicide.” – Telegraph online.

    Please let it be Gordon Brown, please let it be Gordon Brown, please let it be.. DAMNIT!

    Like

  47. 176
    Oh Dear! says:

    Like

    • 180
      jgm2 says:

      Phone ‘em up and take another 50p off their credit.

      Like

      • 184
        An English Banker and proud of it says:

        We run massive Banks looking after and lending Billions – we employ and manage hundreds of thousands of staff ……….The profits we make go to the Inland revenue and to our shareholders who, by the way are YOU within YOUR pension funds.

        So up yours you lefty scum bags.

        You want a real target? go after the ‘manufactured’ pop stars, lefty movie stars, the highly paid BBC commies, the footballers all earning many millions and avoiding their tax by way of dodgy tax avoidance scams. ….Even the Guardian Newspaper is tax dodging ………..

        Like

    • 217
      Arthur Bent says:

      UK Uncut will be cut off !

      Like

    • 238
      The Paragnostic says:

      T-Mobile?

      Couldn’t they have gone with Vodaphone, FFS?

      Like

  48. 185
    angelnstar says:

    http://cyberboris.wordpress.com/2012/01/27/great-new-movie-in-pre-production-red-kens-henchmen/

    Laurie Penny’s wild, unsubstantiated claims did Ken Livingstone no favours but were totally in line with his campaign.

    I don’t get Laurie. She claims to have ideals, but backs a candidate with the vilest of divisive views, and doesn’t turn a hair. What is that about?

    Ken claims to be “reaching out” to extremist Iran. Read the link above to see how true that is.

    Like

    • 228
      jgm2 says:

      To be fair to Laurie, in the clip I’ve seen, she did highlight the point that Labour had no policies. Which she seemed to think explained Ken not being 15 points ahead in London.

      No Laurie. If Labour had any policies they’d be 15 points behind. It’s Labour having policies that got us into this mess. That mendacious jackass Straw was gobshiting today about how he’s got nothing to do. No legislation to pass.

      Do you know that that sounds like to the rest of us?

      Fucking magic.

      No new rules. No new ‘you can’t do this’ or ‘you can’t do that’. No new tin-pot apparatchiks with clip-boards that we must employ in some council office, desperately trying to look busy, cluttering up our lives with pointless fucking SHITE.

      Labour are only neck-and-neck in the polls, having lost a five-point lead nationally, precisely because they’ve been raising their profile and reminding everybody what an incompetent bunch of utter arseholes they are. Labour doesn’t need polices (which is kind of lucky because they don’t have any). Labour just needs to keep it’s fucking mouth shut and hope that in five years time enough people have forgotten what a bunch of incompetent fucking jackasses they are.

      You’re welcome.

      Like

  49. 189
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Who the hell would want to sponser her?
    Brainless loony leftie – needs to do live a bit and read some history (at least a few decades back before she was born).

    Like

  50. 191
    Lord Vader of Tatooine says:

    I love how “squander” always ends up appearing alongside any product of the left. It’s so fucking easy, a child could spot them for the intellectual wank-stains that they all are. Guardian readership: 239,652. That’s the sum-total of the gobshite minority we’re dealing with. And most of them work for the BBC.

    Like

  51. 192
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Nothing to do with politics
    This guy mixed up his Badger and Beaver !
    One hole he shouldn’t have entered !

    http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/weird/gordon-ramsays-dwarf-porn-double-found-dead-in-a-badger-den-in-wales/story-e6frev20-1226137951576

    Like

  52. 196
    Stephen Hester says:

    I’m going on the Million Pound Drop with Davina !

    Like

  53. 208
    The Guardian European referendum. says:

    The Eurotrash elite is now up to 2%.The Guardianistas will not be pleased.

    Add to their misery here: http://tinyurl.com/7xxyrb6

    Like

  54. 211
    Bogeyman says:

    “Talkin abo’ the Labour Par’y, no’ my cigare’ ”

    Why can’t these fucking kids say their Ts?

    Like

  55. 215
    CRINGE....Penny would turn Red if she could see herself says:

    Like

    • 231
      jgm2 says:

      To be fair to Laurie, in the clip, she did highlight the point that Labour had no policies. Which she seemed to think explained Ken not being 15 points ahead in London.

      No Laurie. If Labour had any policies they’d be 15 points behind. It’s Labour having policies that got us into this mess. That mendacious jackass Straw was gobshiting today about how he’s got nothing to do. No legislation to pass.

      Do you know that that sounds like to the rest of us?

      Fucking magic.

      No new rules. No new ‘you can’t do this’ or ‘you can’t do that’. No new tin-pot apparatchiks with clip-boards that we must employ in some council office, desperately trying to look busy, cluttering up our lives with pointless fucking SHITE.

      Labour are only neck-and-neck in the polls, having lost a five-point lead nationally, precisely because they’ve been raising their profile and reminding everybody what an incompetent bunch of utter arseholes they are. Labour doesn’t need polices (which is kind of lucky because they don’t have any). Labour just needs to keep it’s fucking mouth shut and hope that in five years time enough people have forgotten what a bunch of incompetent fucking jackasses they are.

      You’re welcome.

      Like

    • 252
  56. 216
    Fracking awful says:

    Fancy me being a Eurosceptic who once had a great holiday in Alicante, oh dear.

    Like

    • 253
      Tachybaptus says:

      Me too, and I’ve never been near the place. What a shoddy set of questions, typical of the Guardian which is more concerned with making itself look clever than with what people actually think.

      Like

      • 278
        The entire staff at the Grouniad + BBC says:

        Oh but the Grouniad IS clever!

        It’s the only reliable source of the printed word! The BBC does the pikchas.

        And all of us patiently work and wait for the return of Gordon, who will Save us!

        Simples!

        Like

  57. 220
    Penny sees Red says:

    Like

    • 222
      Penny now hysterical. Electric fag failure. says:

      Like

      • 226
        jgm2 says:

        Not at all Laurie. They were merely bringing your belligerent idiocy to the attention of a different audience.

        For what it’s worth I think you are a worthy successor to Polly when she finally realises that she’d better spend the money she’s accumulated being professionally concerned before some fucker takes it in death duty.

        A seamless transition of trenchant fuckwittery is assured.

        Like

      • 257
        An English Banker and proud of it says:

        No Dear we are highlighting the fact that you are DAFT ……..when you grow up you will, we hope, understand things better

        Like

      • 269
        JH says:

        I suppose you’ve never said anything intended to ‘hurt, scare or threaten’, have you love?

        Apart from inevitable comments about evil Tories, who of course deserve it, etc. Yawn.

        You are a willing participant in the decimation of political discourse in this country on a daily basis. Proud?

        Like

      • 283
        I don't need no doctor says:

        Laurie, go away dear, oh and yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

        Like

  58. 223
  59. 229
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:

    Still no word on Huhne?

    Come on CPS, either charge the lying fucker or make up some ridiculous reason why he can’t.

    Like

  60. 241
    And? says:

    Like

  61. 246
    not a machine says:

    I wonder why ed doesnt have anything to say on the Euro ??

    Like

  62. 247
    Big Ben says:

    I so would Penny Red…

    Like

  63. 249
    A valid point. says:

    Like

  64. 254
    albacore says:

    A kid for boss of RBS?
    Well, wouldn’t that be a fine mess!
    Thank goodness that our Parliaments
    Are scholars, sages, toffs and gents
    Just fancy if an utter nutter
    That couldn’t tell gold bars from butter
    Were left in charge of our country
    Can you imagine where we’d be?

    Like

  65. 256
    Anonymous says:

    How many people at Brighton College (£30k a year in fees alone) do you reckon had accents like that?

    Like

  66. 258
  67. 275
    Shooty* says:

    Jesus Christ, she’s f**king unbearable.

    Like

  68. 279
    Anonymous says:

    Wow! No shit Sherlock. The Labour party writ small. No wonder the country is fucked.

    Like

  69. 288
    angela says:

    http://cyberboris.wordpress.com/2012/01/28/laurie-pennys-reputation-as-a-feminist-is-shot-to-hell-unless-she-renounces-support-for-ken-livingstone/#comment-8162

    Laurie Penny claims to be a female activist. After backing Ken Livingstone, whose pals accept rape, female genital mutilation and assault on women – not anymore.

    Like

  70. 290
    Mary Jackson says:

    If you play the video go to “Penny is a fuckwit” to see her fail to answer any question then when the Goldman guy is speaking she interrupts him to waffle on about something of interest to Emily Mathlis (Manolo Blahniks?) that she lets the intteruptiom go to show what a dreadful interviewer she is.

    Like

  71. 292
    Anonymous says:

    Laurie Penny?

    I would and she swallows.

    Like

  72. 294
    Incongruent says:

    Penny is a spoilt middle class skool girl taking on causes in which she has no REAL personal experience in. She does not understand poverty, what it means to be working class, underclass or whatever. She is a middle class scrounger who scrounges off the poor and their causes in order to pay for middle class existence. She is worse than the deluded Victorian middle class bints who wanted to teach the working classes how to prepare cavier, salmond, venison in their cookery classes.
    Run a bank? I doubt very much she knows how run a bath.

    Like

  73. 295
    James 42 says:

    I don’t know the woman, but Brillo treated her abominably. Turning away from her to speak to someone else before she had stopped making her point.

    He should treat his guests with respect after inviting them on the programme.

    Brillo showed himself to be a prat of the highest order.

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

Government Needs 10.6% Spending Cuts To Meet Target | IFS
What We Learned From the Referendum | FT
Scottish Crisis Moves South | Nick Wood
English Democrats Accidentally Celebrate Yes Victory | Pink News
Union In Its Current Form is Dead | Janan Ganesh
Labour Could Be Split in Two | Sun
Ashcroft Poll: Why Scotland Voted No | Buzzfeed
Boris: Change Barnett Formula | Sun
Cameron is Back | Dan Hodges
What Happens Now | James Kirkup
Cairo of the North | Quentin Letts


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Diane Abbott on the Daily Politics:

“Labour MPs will unite behind Ed Miliband, once we find out what our policies are.”



cynic says:

Can anyone help me? I went on holiday a week ago and returned to find someone has pulled out the stake and Gordon Brown is back and acting as Prime Minister. What did I miss? Has there been a snap election?


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