January 25th, 2012

Cameron Learns That You Can’t Always Get What You Want

The Prime Minister won’t be Dancing in the Street at Davos today. Proving he is not a Slave to anyone, or Under the Thumb, Mick Jagger has pulled out of a planned appearance with Dave, citing over-politicisation. You can Almost Hear Him Sigh, and Cameron will hope this scandal will just Fade Away. Time Waits for No One and Jagger was told to Take It or Leave It. 

With the meeting Slipping Away, the PM Can’t Get No SatisfactionIt’s All Over Now, but Guido doubts this is The Last Time a celebrity Sittin’ on a Fence will leave a politician stuck  between A Rock and a Hard Place. Or is that Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me)?


  1. 1
    Huh? says:

    I thought Jagger was dead?

  2. 2
    Kronos says:


  3. 3
    Kate Moss says:

    I’m not at the gathering either

  4. 4
    Ed says:

    That’s enough.

  5. 5
    El Jezza says:

    Get Off My Cloud Dave!

  6. 6
    Call Me Dogshit says:

    Miss you.

  7. 7
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    He can’t get no satisfaction.

  8. 8
    Huh? says:

    Ed cant get no statisfaction!

  9. 9
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Will Dave complete the set by inserting a Mars Bar deep into Marianne Faithfull’s fundament?

  10. 10
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Good on Mick! He doesn’t need the aggro, or the work.

    What I’d really like to know is who was going to pay for this?

  11. 11
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Errrr – have you actually seen Marianne Faithfull recently?

    Thought not.

  12. 12
    Dick Scratcher says:


  13. 13
    Ed Miliband says:

    I haven’t had a nosth job and I’m not a clueleth plonker.

  14. 14
    Loungelizard says:

    You know what the sheep farmers in Scotland say Hay hay Macloud get offa my ewe.

  15. 15
    ACDC1 says:

    Not so much “move it like jagger”, more swimming like Brian Jones.

  16. 16
    Dick Scratcher says:

    …thought you liked snow?

  17. 17
    Selohesra says:


  18. 18
    Ed Miliband says:

    Thereth real theel in my thoul.

  19. 19
    Odd Moribund says:

    Mithter Fawketh, you thilly, you forgot Paint it Blackbusters

  20. 20
    Sir Aston Martin says:

    Too Much Blood

    (I like the bit about the Jap who ate his girlfriend)

  21. 21
    The Sleeper says:

    Who gives a shit?

    Jagger has been long exposed as a middle class opportunist who latched onto the idea of being in a ‘working class’ band…as it would give him more street cred.

  22. 22
    Desperate Dan says:

    That’s what happens when you employ over-excited blabbermouths to liaise with the press.

  23. 23
    Sir Aston Martin says:

  24. 24
    Bill Melotti says:


  25. 25
    Penfold says:

    Just ain’t no satisfaction.

  26. 26
    Gay Gordon says:

    Agreed. Some clueless c__t’s moronic jabbering forced Sir Michael to save face. What a t__t!

  27. 27
    media scum says:

    If these jokers could get the economy right, we could see the return of factory girls

  28. 28
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Mars Bars have changed shape dramatically since I was a lad, it would seem.

  29. 29
    jgm2 says:

    Let us all bask at the delicious knowledge that just as the UK was recording negative growth the opposition publicly announced that they would not reverse the Tory ‘cuts’.

    A tactical faux pas almost on the same scale as Cameron proclaiming he’d match the Maximum Imbecile’s spending plans while behind the scenes Fred Go*od*win and Andy Hornby were begging for a few hundred billion in soft loans.

  30. 30
    Idle says:

    Pity. It reduces the chance of Dave being founf floating upsdie down in the hotel swimming pool in the early hours.

  31. 31
    Boudicca says:

    Wild Horses couldn’t drag him to Davos.

  32. 32
    Loungelizard says:

    Having missed the job at the IMF I see Gordon is now pleading for another global position. He want’s a global education fund. Big job and world kudos for himself and his ghastly wife.

  33. 33
    jgm2 says:

    A global education fund?

    Doing to global education what Labour did to UK education?

    Costs a fortune to turn out the most stupid 21 year-olds in history?

  34. 34
    jgm2 says:

    I thought it was Michael Jagger he was planning to app*ear with not Michael Barrymore.

  35. 35
    Fingerprint File says:

  36. 36
    jgm2 says:

    I thought it was Michael Jagger he was planning to app*ear with not Michael Ba*rr*ymore.

  37. 37
    Starfucker says:

  38. 38
    Jimmy says:

    Well after all he is a man of wealth and taste.

  39. 39
    Boudicca says:

    Up to their necks in debt because of tuition fees that Brown’s lot introduced.

  40. 40
    Mark Oaten says:

    I like eating Brown Sugar — especially that of Wild Horses.

  41. 41
    Moscow Mike Handycock (sex Tourist on Taxpayer's money) says:

    I would be in Davos, but unfortunately, I am on important national business in eastern europe at the moment, which is entirely unavoidable.


  42. 42
    Loungelizard says:

    Don’t think Brown gives a shit about how much it costs or even if it achieves anything, all he wants is a fancy title and the rest of us to be impressed.

  43. 43
    Gordon Brown says:

    I sit and watch, as tears go by.

  44. 44
    Desperate Dan says:

    Cameron and Osborne should pull out of Davos as well. Its going to be a gathering of third-rate and failed Labour politicians.

  45. 45
    Desperate Dan says:

    And their sleazy paymasters.

  46. 46
    Desperate Dan says:

    You’re wrong there. They’ve all got qualifications in media studies, camping on private land, holocaust studies and telling lies..

  47. 47
    Tory Cat says:

    A real rock star would have used a Toblerone.

  48. 48
    Olga Bonkalot says:

    If you are visiting Moscow, Handy, don’t forget you owe me and the girls money from your last visit.

  49. 49
    Maximus says:

    Nah. Just dead-beat.

  50. 50
    Spot the Dog in Billy Brag's Country House in Dorset says:


  51. 51
    Mando Lynne says:

    Get real guys

    Mick has at least got a degree in economics, and he definitely earns more than Cameron and probably has trousered more dosh than those boys will ever see.

    My guess is if they asked Mick to sort out the economy, Keith could sort all the export market from Colombia and the golden triangle, and Ronnie well, what a star he’s your man for the Arts and Media when he’s around and not shagging some 20 year old strumpet.

    Jobs a good un

  52. 52
    The Livin Dead says:

    And I thought Davos was dead.

  53. 53
    Deadavos... says:


    Davos is for 20th century peacocks.

  54. 54
    Wot i want to know is.... says:

    Wo iz davo abt.

  55. 55
    Desperate Dan says:

    Mick probably realised he’d be an odd man out at Davos – the only person there who’d earned his fortune by his own honest toil.

  56. 56
    Mark says:

    Like a football Jagger should be given a good kicking.

  57. 57
    Jabba the Cat says:

    Iirc, Jagger got his A-Levels, which back in the day would have been to a standard that surpasses modern so called degrees.

  58. 58
    Diane Abbot says:

    Poor Dave. Jagger met with me once, we went to Paint it Black together #blackpower

  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    “Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me)” was by The Temptations.

  60. 60
    Anonymous says:

    Dave looks like Pete Rinaldi from Hot Leg with that hair.

  61. 61
    The Beast in pink wellies says:

    You gotta have Sympathy for the devil?

  62. 62
    Jimmy says:

    I understand a meeting between Gideon and Keef is still going ahead in the hotel bathroom.

  63. 63
    Anonymous says:

    He could always go Under Cover

  64. 64
    anonymous says:

    and Cameron was in Def Leopard

  65. 65
    HappyUK says:

    Your citing of Stones tracks belies the undisputable fact they haven’t done a decent album since the early seventies. Ditto every other pensionable idiot on the rock scene today.

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