January 24th, 2012

Exclusive: Labour Call in the Pollsters for Crisis Welfare Briefing

With Ed continuing to plummet in the polls and Labour peers voting against the wishes of Labour voters on the benefits bill, Guido is not that surprised to learn that a crisis meeting has been called, for after PMQs tomorrow at 1230, there will be a briefing session on public attitudes to Labour and welfare reform in the Shadow Cabinet room for members of the PLP.

The session will be lead by James Morris, who is seconded from pollsters Greenberg Quinlan Rosner to Team Ed. He will break the news to the MPs gently, by running through Labour’s private polling. The Shadow Cabinet will be coaxed towards an understanding of the attitudes of that reality based community, better known as the voting public, with hard data about what the public think about Labour’s position on welfare and welfare reform generally. Guido hopes that Morris will offer a slightly more astute and sophisticated analysis than he tweeted last night:

This benefits cap issue is toxic for Labour, who are violently out of sync with the public here, in particular their own lower-income working voters. Oh to be a fly on the wall tomorrow…


  1. 1
    Just Do It! says:

    so they havent got a clue then?

  2. 2
    Tony M says:

    As flies like to hang around shit there should be plenty on the walls of that room tomorrow.

  3. 3
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    Away with the fairies, dear. And as for Labour ……

  4. 4
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Message to Ed Miliband – RESIGN, Fuck off and take the rest of your shadow cabinet with you.

  5. 5
    Sad soul says:

    But as they are all deficit deniers and on expenses nothing will change

  6. 6
    The Bishop of Lalalalalalalala says:

    We’re all fucking deluded together.

  7. 7
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    We Socialists have to support the disadvantaged, poor, perverted no-hopers in this life. You ask why, because they vote for us. Here I am giving an interview to Gaydar radio. After this I expect all the gay community in Portsmouth will vote for me.

  8. 8
    jgm2 says:

    Never noticed it before but there’s a face in that red rose running SW to NE. It looks like some Mount Rushmore type carving or a bust. Is it Lenin?

  9. 9
    Anonymous says:

    I would just like to remind you of the Gordon Brown mantra of “no more boom and bust” as we think about how we will pay off the trillion pound debt we now owe.

    There is no more money, but surely this won’t stop the socialists? it hasn’t before and I see no reason as to why it will now.

    Just carry on giving out those benefits, it’s a sure way to get their vote! Then just tax every one who does work, even more!

  10. 10
    Andrew Efiong says:

    They need a pollster to explain that giving out £26,000 a year in benefits is enough?

    Once the party of workers, Labour has become the party of shirkers.

  11. 11
    Andy JS says:

    £26,000. That’s the figure – keep repeating it at every opportunity. £26,000.

  12. 12
    Anonymous says:

    Could be that other rabid socialist, Adolf Hitler.

  13. 13
    Raving Loon says:

    The only people who support the status quo on welfare are the feckless, and the liberal elite who think everyone should be indentured slaves dependent on the government.

  14. 14
    jgm2 says:

    Gaydar Radio? You’re fucking well kidding? There are folk so obsessed by their own gay-ness that they started a fucking radio station so that they could broadcast their gay message to like-minded gay-ers?

    Maybe. After all there is ‘Talk Sport’.

    The Ads must be a hoot.

  15. 15
    Anonymous says:

    I am kind of confused any way.

    Was there this amount of fuss when dear old Gordon decided to scrap the 10p tax rate for the very lowest of low paid workers?

    Remember it was a socialist government who hit the poorest hardest, those that decided to work any way!

    May be they decided it wasn’t worth working on low pay after all?

  16. 16
    Mike Litorus says:

    No! The more Ed is around, the more the Labia party is dead in the water.

  17. 17
    jgm2 says:

    It does look like Adolf.

    Well done.

    Somebody was either taking the p155 when they designed it or he was put in there deliberately.

  18. 18
    Help The Aged says:

    Please go and shit on someone else’s blog you old bag.

  19. 19
    Loungelizard says:

    Perhaps they can run Upchucka telling Brillosconi that polls are pretty much an irrelevance. Then just to get a balance they can have two minutes silence while Diane Abbo tweets that the Tories are ahead.

  20. 20
    EdButLookBalls says:

    It’s beam me up Eddie, Patrick Stewart!

  21. 21
    Failed Asylum Seeker says:

    Mr Handycock Sir. I am an immigrant living on benefits, that the Authorities wish to return to my Islamic country. Since arriving in this country, I have realised that I am gay and have also converted to the Christian religion. I see that you are wearing a masonic ring on your little finger, so I am also trying to join the masons. Can you help me sir, I am desperate not to be sent back home where I will have to work for a living and most likely be tortured and much worse.

  22. 22
    EdButLookBalls says:

    It’s easy to explain, doesn’t need expensive polling orgs etc., it’s free, Liebour are an ‘Irrelevance’ !

  23. 23
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Very expensive votes, but votes nonetheless.

  24. 24
    Odds are not favourable, but I need to ask says:

    Will Gordon attend?

  25. 25
    jgm2 says:

    How fucking stupid must Labour be to vote against a cap at 26K?

    Even were it the ‘right thing to do’ to vote against such a cap (which it isn’t) there is no way that message could be conveyed to your average tax-payer. You’d have to app*eal to all manner of convoluted argument whereas the Tories have only to point out the glaring unfairness of subsidising non-workers to have a more comfortable lifestyle than the average working family. To subsidise folk to live closer to work which they won’t do while the tax-payer has to spend a fortune commuting past these fucking wasters to get to work because he can’t afford to live in the houses these wasters have been gifted.

    It’s electoral lunacy to oppose these changes.

  26. 26
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    If you move to Portsmouth, and bring all you friends down and promise that you will all vote for me. I will gladly help you, my ‘boys’ will provide you with accommodation which the Council will pay for it. Boaz.

  27. 27
    Sandalista says:

    Off topic a bit.

    What is is about Labour run Councils that they need so many full time Union reps (aka Pilgrims)? Are they such poor employers that their staff need so much union representation?

  28. 28
    Knob Ed says:

    I keep staring at my blank sheet of paper but I can’t think of any policy ideas. I’ll just have to do Tory-lite and wait until the next bandwagon comes along.

  29. 29
    Nothing will ever change says:

    Nothing will change.

  30. 30
    Pilgrim's Progress says:

    The support of the Socialist workers party? Says it all really

  31. 31
    Why so much? says:

    4.5 x my pension

  32. 32
    GnosticBrian says:

    So you don’t know the difference between “lead” (amongst other things, a heavy metal) and “led” (the past tense of the verb to lead)?

  33. 33
    jgm2 says:

    Fuck off Julie.

  34. 34
    Prezza for police Commisioner lololololololololololol oops, I've peed myself says:

    Divide and rule.

  35. 35
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:


  36. 36
    Tessa Tickles says:

    “Oooh, hello sweeties! Have youuuu been the victim of a gay-hate crime? Gay-hate crimes like a stranger not holding a door open for you? Or a shop selling you some milk, only for you to realise when you got back to your cottage it was just past its sell-by date? Well, you’re a victim. Even if you’re not. If you think you are, you are. We at Cock, Munch, Shitstabber & Co solicitors are leading specialists in no-win no fee claims. If you’ve been the victim of a gay-hate crime in the last 3 years, be a dear and give Malcolm a tinkle on 0848 696969.”

  37. 37
    Sir Merv the Printer says:

    No money? No problem — excuse me will I visit the B of E Shxthouse and Quantitatively Ease another 275bn quid — what’s that noise in the corner? some little guy had more of his pathetic savings stolen? — silly little fxcker, he needs to shut and keep paying income tax for the benefits recipients as those hypocritical Bishops have said.

  38. 38
    Hull benefit parasite and shoplifter says:

    He’s got my vote.

  39. 39
    Mrs. Ball-Scooper ( triple flipper ) says:

    Want to phone a friend ? Ask the audience ??

  40. 40
    Sophie says:

    Even with Ed Militant at the helm Cameron is barely scraping his nose ahead in the polls.

    Surely someone in the Conservative Party has got to wake up to the fact that pandering to the public sector, to the militant leftist placement in the civil service, to the DFID lobby, to the pro EU at all costs lobby is against majority public opinion?

    Why is Dave so different to Ed here – both are out of touch with the country, both believe that the state knows best, both are fully paid up members of the EU nomenklatura.

    If Labour had a half sensible leader who would look after the interests of the indigenous people of this land first Cameron would disintegrate.

    Vote UKIP.

  41. 41
    Joolee Dayvis, sexy name, sexy gal says:

    For her support I sent her a 66B cup size.
    Enough room there to stash her £££££££££££££££££.

    Still not on the teaching staff at Northumberland Park Community School.

  42. 42
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    I can’t understand why they would need any representation. Public sector workers have to do something really, really bad to get sacked.

    Money for old rope. That’s Councils for you.

  43. 43
    Ed Balls says:

    The answer is to basically say to voters: Vote Labour or we’ll send you to Harrowden Hills. A bit of bullying, intimidation and violent threats has always done wonders for our party.

  44. 44
    World Economic Forun says:

    They’ll have to be quick about it cuz Ed and Gordon and Sarah are flying out to Davos straight after.


  45. 45
    Cynical-old-bag says:


  46. 46
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Our pensions got sucked up into the black hole Gordon Brown created, so £26,000 is 100% increase on the pension I’ll collect.

  47. 47
    Chuka Urmunneyaround says:

    If this crisis meeting is directly after PMQ, will Cameron lay off Red Ed ???
    Will Ed rise to the challenge and play a blinder ?

    DUEMA !!

  48. 48
    The Stilton Eater says:

    Stupid enough to think Gordon Brown and Ed Miliband were the right people to lead the party?

  49. 49
    St.Tone and Slotgob says:

    We don’t think 26000 quid a year is anything like enough. We need more like 2,600,000 pa to fund or champagne socialist lifestyle.

  50. 50
    Watch says:

    I see the welfare bill vote has been almost entirely erased from the BBC news homepage today. Even the Guardian leads on it, but the BBC cover up for Labour’s voting fuck up. Are they Save Ed members?

  51. 51
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Write another shitty book then.

  52. 52
    Desperate Dan says:

    David Miliband invited Jo Brand of the BBC up to South Shields last week to give a lecture at the local tech about the dire consequences of voting Tory. – Disease, pestilence, homelessness, mass starvation, torture, slavery, drowning etc. You’d be surprised at how many northerners are willing to believe that sort of garbage.

  53. 53
    Jasmin Alibi Cunt says:

    The dogshit who infest this country will ensure ensure triumph for the Labour Party, be in no doubt.

    They will ensure triumph for the hero of the people Ken Livingstones in May!!
    Then aided by the vermin at the BBC, the national Government will fall to the forces of foreigners, scroungers and degenerates!!

    I am correct in every way!!

  54. 54
    swivelmillibandyouwanker says:

    You misunderstand. We know nothing. They are the all seeing intellectuals.
    They walked all over this Nation during 13yrs of dictatorship because they think we are shit. Many millions will never forgive them.

  55. 55
    Brillo says:

  56. 56
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Any publicity is good publicity, eh Julie?

    Says it all, really.

  57. 57
    Sir Merv the Printer says:

    I hope you’ve allowed for the 5% inflation that I’ve Q.E.’d for you in your figures Madam

  58. 58
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:


  59. 59
    Gonk says:

    Labour leaders and most metropolitan supporters don’t like
    the indigenous people of this land. In fact, they’re ashamed of them.

  60. 60
    David Milliband says:

    Hee Hee!

  61. 61
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    I can remember visiting my local Job Centre, where a man was sitting at one of the desks waiting for the girl behind it to find jobs on the computer.

    When she found one he was obviously qualified to do, he made the excuse that he wouldn’t be able to get there because it was a bus ride away. She said nothing and carried on looking.

    This is what we’re up against, folks.

  62. 62
    Cream Puff says:

    Millipede should be suicidal
    If he thinks these figures are bad, then no one has shown him or the other London party clowns what thier figures are like in Scotland
    For the first time in , well for the first time Labour are trailing the SNP in the Westminster vote. As for personal approval ratings Alex Salmond has an all time record with a very possitive approval rating that other european leaders can only have wet dreams about. Millipedes Rosa Klebb hasnt been able to curtail the First Ministers popularity
    No wonder Labour/Tory/Libdem are doinga joint op north of the border to try and scare the people with inane scare stories, which is turning counter productive

  63. 63
    David Milliband says:

    Ho ho!

  64. 64
    The Labour Party says:

    But we’re not wrong. It’s the public who are wrong. We’re always right. The public need re-educating. They need to have their views readjusted and thereby corrected.

  65. 65
    The Liebour Party says:

    A vote for UKIP keeps a Tory out.

  66. 66
    Desperate Dan says:

    It can’t be a very serious organisation if they have to invite the likes of Gordon and Ed to make up the numbers.

  67. 67
    Slotgob -- stay away from me you despicable hag says:

    The publishers won’t give me an advance any more after the disastrously poor sales of my last crapsheet. I’m not working for nothing, I’ve got my self respect after all — I’m a Lawyer and a Judge no less

  68. 68
    Loungelizard says:

    I doubt the audience understood a word she said.

  69. 69
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    I’ve just read this.

    Gordon Brown is listed as follows:-

    Gordon Brown, Prime Minister of the United Kingdom (2007-2010) and Chair of the World Economic Forum Global Issues Group

    How the f*ck did he get to be Chairman of this Group? No wonder everything is going down the gurgler. Jonah strikes again.

  70. 70
    Voice of Reason says:

    While I can agree with where you are coming from I don’t think it will happen. Masses of people are now absolutely cheesed off after the Lords amending the benefit bill. I think the Tories will win easily at the next election despite intrusions here and there of Labour immigrants and left-wing nutters.

  71. 71
    jgm2 says:

    I believe he’s being paid what he’s worth for the job. Fuck all.

  72. 72
  73. 73
    Sres says:

    they’re terribly out of sync with the public, but the trade union activists are certainly in line with Labour’s thinking.

  74. 74
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    What’s the point? Years of paying into the bloody things and we’ll never get it back.

  75. 75
    jgm2 says:

    Preaching to the choir anyway. The locals have a pre-disposition for self-harming politics.

  76. 76
    You've got the right idea clitty me old mucka says:

    … but let’s just shove the bastards in the Thames anyway!

  77. 77
    albacore says:

    Erm, what Tories would those be, then?
    Surely you can’t mean the fellow travellers headed by Cameron.
    Can you?

  78. 78
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’ll do a special jobby

  79. 79
    Fred the Shred ( knighted by Gordon Brown for services to banking ) says:

    A service rendered for nothing is worth exactly that. Nothing.

  80. 80
    Why am I so ugly? says:

    There’s no need for Julie to worry her pretty little head over capping.

  81. 81
    Juggler says:

    Did you get her name and report her? Or did you shrug and do nothing?

    We’ve got to take the pilgrims and workshy head on.

  82. 82
    On the other hand ... says:

    Just promise more dosh for doing fuck all ….

  83. 83
    jgm2 says:

    There was one on TV a year or two ago. He’d lost his job and was looking for a new one. Obviously he wanted one that reflected his prior qualifications and experience. He wasn’t going to just settle for any old job.

    And what, you may ask, was this chaps unique skill that had been cast upon the scrap-heap of unemployment?

    He was a delivery dr*iv*er. And he was only interested in delivery dr*iv*er jobs. Because he was qualified to do that.

    Yep. That must be a skilful job alright. Plug in the postcode to your Sat-nav and make your way there then bang on the door and get a signature. Rep*eat until the van is empty. Yep. That would take years of specialist training to get right.

    But the sad part is that this chap obviously did think it would take years of training to do. As opposed to being the sort of thing anybody with a dr*iv*ers li*ce*nce and an IQ in double digits could do immediately.

  84. 84
    Helena Handcart says:

    Distance lends perspective Ed.

    Perhaps if you went a long, long way away and got some actual experience of real life you might be able to return to politics some years from now and be taken vaguely seriously.

    It’s not your fault that, like Gordon Brown, you appear to have been mysteriously groomed for high office but, until you have something to offer in terms of wisdom, energy or conviction you will remain incapable of anything beyond seizing power for its own sake.

  85. 85
    Screwed taxpayer. says:

    To get Job Seekers and related benefits the recipient should be compelled to sit in the job Centre for 40 hours per week hunting for work (time out for proven interviews). This wold stop the lazy fxckers watching TV all day, or the more energetic from doing cash-in-hand black economy work.

  86. 86
    Anonymous says:

    Er, how many UK MPs have there been since its inception ? None.
    Er, how many will there be in 2015 ? None.

    ‘Nuff said.

  87. 87
    Universal Hiss says:

    Probably registered as a central London shepherd.

  88. 88
    I ain't no iron! says:

    Wee Dougie Alexander is out jogging one morning, notices a little boy on the corner with a box. Curious he runs over to the child and says, ‘What’s in the box sonny?’ To which the little boy says, ‘Kittens, They’re brand new kittens.’
    Dougie laughs and says, ‘What kind of kittens are they? ‘Socialists’, the child says.
    ‘Oh that’s lovely, ‘ Dougie smiles and he runs off.

    A couple of days later Dougie is running with his colleague Ed Balls and he spies the same boy with his box just ahead. Dougie says to ED, ‘Watch this.’ and they both jog over to the boy with the box.
    Dougie says, ‘Look in the box Ed, isn’t that cute? Look at those little kittens. Och aye laddie, tell my friend Ed what kind of kittens they are.’
    The boy replies, ‘They’re Tories.’
    ‘What?’ Dougie says, ‘I jogged by here the other day and you said they were Socialists. What’s changed? ‘Well, ‘the lad says, ‘Their eyes are open now.’

  89. 89
    Inna nuts hell says:

    lead v lead

    The LabourParty is led
    By some chumpy guy called Ed.
    Ed Balls would like to lead
    But is too much of a weed.

  90. 90
    Barreness Udders, sucking on the Great Socialist Tit says:

    Like to see a picture of my lovely home?

  91. 91
    I'm effin Terry Wogan says:

    My dad is a brownite…all I say to him is for fuck sake get over it, he was shit anyway, aint no Ed gona sort it out now dad, maybe you should quit ya drinking. Still at least Ed will do something Blair aint ever done, end the link between the Unions and Labour. Never the less Ed, the thing to do is get rid of union support if you actually have support from someone else. Seriously Ed you cant run a party on rainbows and dreams and ZX 48K Spectrums.

  92. 92
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    To be honest, I was too angry to speak to anyone after that. The guy was a scrounger and he wasn’t even embarrassed that people sitting behind him overheard this.

    He had no intention of working and he was only there to get his book stamped and collect his money.

  93. 93
    I'm effin Terry Wogan says:


  94. 94
    Ctesibius says:

    Can we all picket it and ask them for our money back?

  95. 95
    The BeBeC says:

    VøtΣ Σd ΛΛìllìb@nd

  96. 96
    Observer says:

    The BBC is funded by a tax (that is how the National Audit Office regards the “licence fee”) and so is part of the dependency culture.

  97. 97
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    There’s no application these days.

    Mr Bag was made redundant back in the 80’s but used his qualifications to retrain in another field. It can be done, but people are lazy.

  98. 98
    jgm2 says:

    Location, location and location. It doesn’t matter how pretty it looks if nobody wants to live there.

    And Bangladesh would definitely qualify as ‘nobody wants to live there’.

  99. 99
    Selohesra says:

    They will vote for whoever offers to spend the most of someone elses taxes on them

  100. 100
    Universal Hiss says:

    For my sins many years ago I worked for the then was DSS.

    I interviewed an 18 year old male who said he would only take foundry work.He had already been unemployed 2 years.All the foundries in the area had closed years before.I stopped his benefit which he regained on appeal.

    The whole system has been shit for years.

  101. 101
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    He must get expenses – can’t see a Scotsman doing anything for nothing, least of all him.

  102. 102
    Desperate Dan says:

    He got the job because he’s got issues.

  103. 103
    George O. says:

    Well said. 2 legs good. 4 legs bad. The old Labourites who had actually once done some real work are all dead now.

  104. 104
    jgm2 says:

    Oh yeah, he’ll get expenses. He’s paid in Airmiles and Hilton HHonor points.

    Paid what he’s worth. Fuck all.

  105. 105
    A Hem says:

    Well if he doesn’t get the commissioners job he could be really useful as a rolling road block or a temporary roundabout, a flood barrier even, cripes! so many options so little time

  106. 106
    Universal Hiss says:

    People said that about the SNP a few years ago.

  107. 107
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Seems as if she is really busy today.

    “Julie_Davies Julie Davies
    How are you going to fast-track teacher sackings when there are no union reps left? You can’t do it without them. #AskGove
    1 hour ago

    Julie_Davies Julie Davies
    Don’t you need workplace union reps for capability cases and when teachers are sick or subject to malicious allegation? #AskGove
    1 hour ago

    Julie_Davies Julie Davies
    Isn’t there a legal requirement for workplace union reps to be involved in TUPE consultation when schools become academies? #AskGove
    1 hour ago.”

    What was it about the number of dismissals – money for old rope. Let the NUT not Haringay Ratepayers pick up the bill for your work.

  108. 108
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Try living off Slotgob for a few years.

    I’ll bet her annual remuneration is quite substantial.

  109. 109
    albacore says:

    Yep, gotta abide by the rules.
    You can vote only Conservative, Labour or Liberal – because everybody else does and, heaven forfend, the sky would fall in if you failed to conform.

  110. 110
    A Hem says:

    I hope the f#cking thing flattens you when it does come along

  111. 111
    A Hem says:


  112. 112
    Desperate Dan says:

    Thanks to the late unlamented Labour govt, she’s got £500,000 out of the taxpayer to spend on furthering the interests of socialism. To the SWP and Labour MP’s she’s a star.

  113. 113
    Diane Abbarse says:

    Watch out — I’ll be promoted to glory into the House of Lords soon — sucking on the other tit alongside you.

  114. 114
    I'm effin Terry Wogan says:

    wow, deep shit, but still, if only socialist where all blind, we could get away with a fair amount of shit

  115. 115
    jgm2 says:

    How are you going to fast-track teacher sackings when there are no union reps left? You can’t do it without them.

    Want to bet?

    If the Union won’t supply a Rep on their own buck then the teacher had better get a different union or a different representative.

  116. 116
    Just Do It! says:

    The labour party gets more flack than me :)

  117. 117
    Mark Oaten says:


  118. 118
    gildedtumbril says:

    All three main shitheap parties are traitors, pure and simple. They need, or should I say, we need to give them remedial treatment and/or re-education beginning with… Tarring, feathering, hanging, drawing and quartering and culminating with heads on pikes on Westminster Bridge. Seems reasonable.

  119. 119
    jgm2 says:

    @Universal Hiss

    Exactly. Now look at them. Poised to sail their rock off into Brussels.

    Laughable that.

    Shake off the yoke of tyranny of their hated southern neighbours and promptly shackle themselves to some different neighbours.

    This ‘Independence’ is obviously a more complex subject than it first ap*pe*ars.

  120. 120
    Just Do It! says:

    Good call jmg – pretty obvous once you know it is there but i never saw it before

  121. 121
    Just Do It! says:

    somtimes us gays need to sticker together against everybody lese

  122. 122
    Herr Merkel says:

    No-one with half a brain. It worked very well for the PIIGS, though – for a while, anyway.

  123. 123
    Andrew Efiong says:

    My suggestion is that each unemployed person should send 100 handwritten letters a day to random taxpayers. They express their gratitude for the benefit payments they get for free and can explain the steps they’re taking to find work.

  124. 124
    Andrew Marrrrrr's diseased arsehole says:

    I lurrrve your massive fucking knockers

  125. 125
    Anonymous says:

    I’m looking for an old friend. He’s name is Ed Balls. Has anyone seen or heard anything from him recently? Please ask him to call me. GordonMy name is Gordon, he’ll know me. Thanks.

  126. 126
    albacore says:

    So tell us the old, old story
    About that mythical Tory
    From the age of the dinosaur
    When they did more than just jaw-jaw
    And flush the nation down the pan
    Oh, do pray tell us. If you can

  127. 127
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Same shit, different day.

  128. 128
    Lord Tebbit of Semtex says:

    What’s a bus?

  129. 129
    Baby Heinrich says:

    Piano wire suspensions from Westminster Bridge lamp-posts would be as effective and less messy.

  130. 130
    Just Do It! says:

    to be fair to Gordon, there was not really a boom

  131. 131
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Looks as if she made it into The Standard again.


    Pickles might do something about it. When did the pay for a Union Rep scam start – if Julie Davies wants to work for the NUT, it should pick up the bill for her full time work.

    Dave, when are the placemen in the Quangos going to be culled? That bitch in charge of The Electoral Commission is still drawing a salary.

  132. 132
    Diane Abbarse says:

    Pop over and I’ll give your jug ears a double mammary massage.

  133. 133
    The £26k Benefits Cap Should Apply To The BBC ! says:


  134. 134
    The £26k Benefits Cap Should Apply To The BBC ! says:


  135. 135
    Lord MandySon says:

    I’m intensely relaxed about people getting filthy rich on benefits

  136. 136
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Trillion pound + national debt.
    What was the debt when labour took power and when they left power after 13 years. Anyone know?

  137. 137
    DUDLEY ZOO says:

    It is halfway through January and John Prescott is still a fat bastard

  138. 138
    smoggie says:

    and bring your sister

  139. 139
    Tory terrier says:

    Sophie, you and Albacore are one and the same. Why don’t you shove your “vote UKIP” up your silly ars*? You may go (in the name of gawd go).

  140. 140
    Sharon Shoesmith says:

    Stop persecuting this hardworking conscientious Haringey employee. I know how painful it can be when all one does is one’s best

  141. 141
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Mark Serwotka says that £9bn return is an excellent result.

  142. 142
    I don't need no doctor says:

    And always be!

  143. 143
    Gordon Brown says:

    There is no such thing as debt, only overinvestment

  144. 144
    Viz Editor says:

    They love fat slags in South Shields. They were coming in their keks as she sweated like a pig.

  145. 145
    Hang on Guido? says:

    The duties imposed on jurors are becoming more rigorous. A report for the Ministry of Justice in 2010 found that two out of three jurors do not fully understand the legal directions given to them by judges when they retire to consider their verdicts.

  146. 146
    I don't need no doctor says:

    I think you have caught a Gold there Gordy Bigot.

  147. 147
    Obese benefits recipient says:

    It’s a pain but stops me from having to get on a bike.

  148. 148
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Guido says he’s surprised that 31% of people oppose the cap on benefits.

    Has Guido never hear of the following?

    Idle scum on council estates
    Bone idle fuckers in the NHS
    Local council dross

    That lot alone will give you 31% of the population

  149. 149
    albacore says:

    Heel, Terrier!
    Go back to licking your more valuable appendages, there’s a good boy.
    Sophie, I must apologise if I have somehow given such unfortunates the impression that you and I are the same poster.
    Lord, the poor cur thinks I support UKIP.

  150. 150
    Wicked Uncle Ernie says:

    Big government and fiddling about in every level of human existence is the only way to growth,

    Labour knows best

  151. 151
    Screwed taxpayer. says:

    Prescott is so yesterday. We all rooting for Porker Pickles nowadays

  152. 152
    Sophie says:

    Ah, another panicking Cameroon liberal lickspittle objecting to real Conservatives pointing out that your current emporer has no blue clothes.

    Why is he doing so badly against Miliband? Could it be the same reason he did so badly against Mcmental?

    UKIP are the Conservative Party in exile. We will reclaim our party & rebuild after Heathite quizzling Dave has been removed. If it takes 5 years of Ed to bring you idiots to your senses then so be it.

    I will vote for a forlorn long shot cure than vote for the same old tired Lab / Lib / Con disease.

    You may go.

  153. 153
    Screwed taxpayer. says:

    You missed out all the illiterate innumerate teachers.

  154. 154
    Fuck the here and now because I can't wait to become a pished stained old socialist bag with brain rot! says:

    Some of the Labour mongs think Miss Cooper Balls will eventually replace Mr Ed M or Chuck is Britain’s answer to Obama. You gotta laugh! I don’t think Labour is taking itself seriously anymore. It can only be describe as the political party for farce. *chuckles*.

  155. 155
    Only in the Graun says:

    Actually, if you are a lesbian feminist then holding the door open for them is a hate crime.

    Just ask Bindel et al.

  156. 156
    Sophie says:

    The EU Regional Fund is theft from the British taxpayers.

    The EU Regional Fund & the EU are fully suppoorted by David Cameron.

    Vote UKIP.

  157. 157
    Sir Merv the Printer says:

    Let me see now. Key 1-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0 enter. There you are, a trillion Q.E.’d. Minor National Debt. inconvenience all solved. When do I get to the Hose of Lords?

  158. 158
    Mzzzzz. HaHaHaHaPerson, the LieBore gift that keeps on giving says:

    Speaking as one of the chief Wimmin, I don’t give any min the chance to open my door.

  159. 159
    A. Specialist in sisterhood says:

    SisterS – surely, – also motherS

  160. 160
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Labour should get someone honest and trustworthy, may I therefore propose Jack Straw.

  161. 161
    Only in the Graun says:

    Never a truer word.

    Also accounts for Labour’s remarkably strong showing in the polls (considering).

  162. 162
    Only in the Graun says:

    Oh. You forgot South Wales.

  163. 163
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Then that’s their problem.

    I’m sorry, but if a Juror does not understand what’s being said to them before considering a verdict, then it is up to them to say so.

  164. 164
    Fish says:

    Looks like Lenin to me, also. What does it signify?

    Got he feeling that the MSM will pick up on this. You could be famous jgm…or dead if Polly Pot gets hold of you!

  165. 165
    Fish says:

    Working in Shepherd’s Market?

  166. 166
    Vehicle builder (rtd) says:

    If anyone is under any illusion about UKIP they should take a look at the pair of loons/weirdos they fielded as candidates (and were elected MEPs) for the West Midlands at the last European election.

  167. 167
    Diane Abbarse says:

    Isa bigga sweata man

  168. 168
    jgm2 says:

    Actually it might be William Hague.

  169. 169
    Really? says:

    Turn it upside down – it’s a cartoonish face with a beaky nose and huge grinning teeth. I’m guessing Roy Fattersley or Call-me-Tone.

  170. 170
    Tales of the Expected says:

    Can’t have (once been) an english teacher could she? Remarkable piss-use of the word ‘popularity’ there I’d say. Hardly ‘appealing to the general public; widely favoured or admired’.

  171. 171
    M says:

    This union run labour party know what they want .
    Which isn’t what the public want
    So they are gonna say what you want to hear
    If you want to know about the real labour party listen to the union barons , Crow, McClusky etc .

  172. 172
    ith thimple when you think about it says:

    Hmm, I think I need to take the helm and thteer the thhip to thounder theath.
    I know what to do – It thoundth like itth time for another welaunch!

  173. 173
    thhow me the way to go home says:

    I thee thtupid people!

  174. 174
    Heraclitus says:

    Nothing endures but change

  175. 175
    Blimey my cash is worthless says:

    It’s not inflation that Merv put in the system for you, it’s currency devaluation.

    Your £ buys f-all outside the UK.

    Just as well we produce our own oil and gas eh? :-(

  176. 176
    Trevor from Treherbert says:

    Labour are now banning all of their members from Hoc canteen until all taxpayer subsidies are stopped and licensing within the building handed over to Westminster Magistrates.

    They are also instructing all members not to speak to Mr Dromey and later this week will lead calls for the prosecution of Mark Reckless for attempting to vote in the House whilst drunk.

    Ed Milliband’s last stand starts here.

  177. 177
    Un payeur de BBC tax says:

    A tax is how I regard the licence fee too.

  178. 178
    Trevor from Treherbert says:

    anyone who marries Ed Balls must be treated with suspicion.

    Recently she could not skin that Theresa May in a cat fight and appears reluctant to readdress the matter.

    Not someone I would like working for me.

    chukka would not last two minutes with a load of merchant bankers.

  179. 179
    Pundit Too says:

    The two Eds’ are proof that education does not give you wisdom.
    It also proves the old adage that the more you know the more you realise how little you know.
    Rabbits transfixed in headlights applies to Labour, BBC, Unions, Anglican Church etc. Good to see Ramsey has today berated these foolish priests and their fellow travellers. They are now seeking a compromise to save face and lie that they finally obtained their purpose of ensuring safeguards protecting vulnerable benefit recipients (benefit scroungers).
    On another note the BBC is constantly propagandizing Obama’s State of the Nation speech without asking why he did not do any of these acts over the last 4 year, and also the Solyndra fiasco is now small fry in that 10 funded sustainable energy companies are now unsustainable after a $6.5 billion bail out. Tony Blair Mark II comes immediately to mind. Unfortunately he is likely to get in with a smaller majority as did Tony on his second tenure.

  180. 180
    Buddy Holly says:

    That’ll be the day

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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