January 10th, 2012

Gordon Brown Bullying Editors Again

Guido forgot to link to an article sent to him yesterday from the website of Fife’s Courier. When Guido went back to the piece today though, it had mysteriously disappeared:

The “Opponents accuse Gordon Brown of failing to perform duties as MP‎” headline is very clear on Google News:

Essentially the errant former Prime Mentalist has faced calls from his local council to quit due to his spectacular efforts to avoid representing his constituents. Smelling a rat Guido decided to make some calls. As far as he can piece together, at some point yesterday Gordon picked up the phone and with characteristic charm and friendliness, politely asked the editor of the Courier to reconsider the article. After a calm negotiation the paper claims that a “compromise about future articles” from Gordon was reached. Thus a mutually agreeable conclusion was reached and both parties went their separate ways amicably. 

Sadly for Gordon though, an eagle-eyed hack at the Scottish Express thought fit to lift the entire story from the Courier’s website and even mooted an upcoming by-election:

Their editor should prepare for incoming fire…


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Funny how lefties call for equality and fairness and then turn out to be bullying lunitics!

    • 3
      Socialism Ate My Future says:


      I’d love to kick the mentalist in the vagina, McRuin certainly hast no balls….

    • 6
      labourunionsbbc we are one says:

      Talking of equality, sharing and all that.
      I see the Cham-pain socialist kirsty wark of B-bbc fame has got another slot hosting another pointless, daft and unentertaing quiz show.

      • 55
        Cell time says:

        Most of BBC presenters seem to have to do extra shows, some of them just have no personality.

        • 85
          Cinna says:

          Be fair they do have a standard of living to maintain in these straightened times and every little helps.

          • Gilbert Fidler says:

            You just assume that they’re cashing in on their dubious positions in the beeb, and every dimbo tosser will want to hire them to open a fete or something banal.

            At their grossly inflated salaries and perks, we never get value for money from their stupid appearances on twat-slots.

        • 154
          Anonymous says:

          Not only do they have extra shows but they also have unhealthy connections to many of the production companies involved in their making.

          • Auld Bob Peffers says:

            In Scotland the presenters have more connections to the Labour Party than a street cur has fleas. BBC means Biased Broadcasting Clique

      • 259
        Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

        Was it made by her television company?

    • 25
      Temper says:

      This would be the same gordon Brown who phoned Rupert Murdoch and ROARED at him ““You are trying to destroy me and my party. I will destroy you and your company.”

      The editor of that Jock provincial did not stand a chance.

    • 26
      Trimbush says:

      You will all remember his clash with the lady in charge of the Bullying Helpline Charity

      The charity had to close – it was referred to the Lady (what was it £300,000 for 3 days a week?) running the Charity Commission – a New Labour Supporter

      The Commission was meant to produce a report on the situation – but I haven’t seen one – has anyone?

      • 28
        Bully Brown says:

        Only a Bully like Brown could Bully a Bullying charity into closing.

        • 131
          Tessa Tickles says:

          I am fascinated at this notion of Brown being a “bully”.

          Brown’s a pathetic sad fat wheezing snotgobbling mong. If he hurled a Nokia at you, it would miss, and if you then hurled the Nokia at *him* you’d take his other eye out.

          And then you could just kick the shit out of him.

          Anyone who calls him a “bully” is just a “coward”.

    • 27
      • 38
        The Bastard says:

        GORDON BROWN faces calls to stand down as an MP because he has been on money-spinning engagements around the world and barely working for his constituents.

        The Scottish Sunday Express can today reveal the jet-setting ex-Prime Minister earned £1million in 2011 and spent up to 100 days on trips pursuing his own private business.

        • 50
          Fish says:

          How much tax did he pay on the £1m ?

        • 64
          M says:

          He seems to have a predatory nature in the persuit of private business to line his pockets & at the same time fleecing the constituency who work to produce his MPs salary
          Is this what Ed ment about predators & producers ?

          • Anonymous says:

            Bad as he may be, he can’t hold a candle to Blair.

          • A daily mail spokesman says:

            Recently it was reported that gordie earnt £500k and then gave it all away. Milliband snr has earnt £400k and pocked the lot.

            Chalk ‘n cheese.

          • Tessa Tickles says:

            Can’t hold a candle to Blair?

            But Blair’s a socialist, a Christian, a Catholic.

            Blair wouldn’t try and evade £8million in taxes, would he? Good kind Christian Catholic Socialist pretty straight forward kind of guy Blair?

            Say it ain’t so!

          • Anonymous says:

            Hitler was also a Christian, Catholic Socialist.

          • smoggie says:

            Blair won’t be receiving £8m in personal income and therefore certainly won’t be paying half of it to the tax man. There’ll be a web of companies onshore and offshore through which this money will be flowing so fast that nobody will be able to catch it.

            He won’t be evading tax but you can be damn sure he’ll be avoiding it.

    • 73
      Jethro Q. Walrus-Titty says:

      When exactly will this BASTARD go on trial for crimes against the people?????

    • 94
      !! says:

      Reminds me of this episode with Gerry Adams..

      Adams has failed his constituents, says pro-Sinn Féin columnist

      Followed swiftly by…
      Weir hits out at newspaper’s ‘grovelling’ apology to Adams

  2. 2
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m still Prime Minister.

    • 36
      I Hate Tesco AND the Pope says:

      Listen, you fucker. I’m one of the poor sods whose pension you stole and wasted on one-legged lesbian outreach workers in Tower sodding Hamlets. I’ll have my revenge in this life or the next. Gordon, you’re a mentally unstable, ignorant, bullying, economically illiterate, one-eyed, hypocritical, physically repulsive lump of crap. I wish your parents had used birth control so you ended up in a condom instead of Number 10. Failing that, they should have strangled you and stuffed you down the bog in tiny pieces. The very sound of your name sends my blood pressure soaring. Fuck you and all you and your lousy, preening predecessor did to your – our – country and countless thousands of poor twats abroad. I’m struggling to find words in the English language strong enough to do justice to how I feel about you and Bliar. I hope you end up rotting on a jock rubbish dump with diseased rats eating your remaining eyeball while you’re still conscious.

  3. 4
    The Underwater Menace says:

    Worst Prime Minister ever and seemingly angling for the prize of Worst MP ever, top work Gordo.

    • 57
      Geoff, England (not Britain or 'United' KIngdom) says:

      You could make a case for Bliar being the worst Prime Minister ever, because he didn’t put Brown on the backbenches as soon as Liebore formed a misgovernment. Brown must have something big on Bliar. If Bliar’s the worst ever, the Brown’s pretty close behind him, not to mention being the worst Chancellor ever. He even managed to make Healey look positively thrifty – no mean feat.

      • 97
        Mine d'Boggles says:

        Healey was on a mission to close down British hi-tech industry aka Defence. All developments there, like TSR2 lead on to better things. Smashing them up or closing them down rips the technology out of this country and transfers it elsewhere.

        • 124
          Lobster Throttler says:

          Labour governments are crawling with Russian spies, and that bastard mountbatten was bribed by the yanks to close down the SR 53.

        • 157
          Anonymous says:

          Whilst I don’t disagree with you, succesive Tory governments also played a large part in destroying our comparative tech advantages post WW2, particularly in the aircraft sector.

          I recommend ‘Empire of the Clouds. When Britain’s aircraft ruled the world’. Read it and weep !

      • 138
        Me & Me. says:

        Both delusional. Exaggerator Blair …. And Wrong Job Gordie.

    • 65
      Archer Karcher says:

      To be fair to the deluded madman, by not doing anything, Brown is probably making his constituents lives better than if he was. That said, anyone who would vote for such an awful bullying thug, deserves a good kicking anyway.

      • 264
        Quo vadis says:

        Given his propensity for courting disaster, his consitutents may feel that they are less likely to incur the wrath of God (fire, storm, pestilence, tsunami, earthquake, plague of frogs etc.) if he is not around.

    • 187
      Anonymous says:

      Oh FFS, you’d think he’d exposed his constituents to radiation something.

  4. 5
    Geoffrey Brooking says:

    Do the honourable thing Gordon.

    F**k off

  5. 8
    Ed Tourette says:


  6. 9
    Eyewash says:

    Is it wise to give him the oxygen of publicity?

  7. 10
    Anonymous says:

    Hopefully there will not be a Fife seat (or for that matter any Scottish seats) in the Houses of Parliament by 2015.

    No Scotland in the Union means NO more Labour majorities in the HoC and no more tax, spend, borrow, borrow and borrow from these incompetents. Then we just will need a real right wing party to challenge Cameron.

    • 14
      AC1 says:

      We can leave Scotchland to Darien Scheme v2.

      • 47
        Remember who really built the empire says:

        Darien, yes we learned from that debacle and used the knowledge to build the British Empire. The main contribution of the inglish in the Empire was devising the paperwork and buggering young native boys. The Foreign office has been in much demand ever since.

        • 61
          What can we thank the shite man for says:

          The British introduced Gin and Syphilis to the New World

          • Mine d'Boggles says:

            Gin, maybe. Syphilis, no.

          • Sir Aston Martin says:

            “The Dutch physician Franciscus Sylvius is credited with the invention of gin.”

            If Wikipedia says so, it must be right. The English just improved it, much as we have improved the Jockanese, but are they grateful?

          • Spartacus says:

            you are diane abbot and i claim my five pounds

          • smoggie says:

            We also improved syphilus.

            Not keen on the original Dutch genever and give me a Tanqueray anyday but it’s all down to a matter of taste.

        • 69
          Lord Mandelbum of Fondleboys says:

          Actually Anonymous, you’re wrong. The LAST THREE Liebour governments (1997, 2001, 2005) ALL HAD BIG MAJORITIES OF MPs IN ENGLAND ALONE – nothing to do with how Scotland voted – everything to do with how English constituents voted – so take your misinformed ignorance and shove it where the sun don’t shine! And cast yor aspersions upon your fellow Ingnorami.

        • 99
          AC1 says:

          You keep believing that…

          Post dependence on English taxpayers, Scotchland will take over the world!

        • 204
          News Flash says:

          You Learnt lots from the Darien scheme at least your bankers did.

          Yes it was a complete disaster, run by William Peterson involved with setting up the bank of England. Peterson lost his life in the swamp that the Darien Peninsula, the location Peterson chose, turned out to be.

          Rather ironically the bail out money given by England to Scotland in the act of Union was used to start the Royal Bank of Scotland. Your bankers learnt to cause a complete disaster.

    • 18
      Raving Loon says:

      Labour will just create more constituencies in Wales and N.England to rig things in the future.

    • 32
      Liblabcon FOAD says:

      Saying good bye to Scotland will give the English the chance to clear house and put all three main stream parties out of business. Good riddance to the lot of them.

      England is going to need actual pro-English parties, not a continuation of the mercenary globalist scum we’re lumbered with right now.

      If you see England as a glorified hotel for the rest of the world to doss in, fuck off.

      If you see England as a nothing but a business, fuck off.

      If you see England as just a test bed for your party’s dogma, fuck off.

      If you don’t see England as a real country with a real indigenous people, fuck off.

      • 221
        John says:

        Like it, nice one.

      • 234
        Rog says:

        1. Scotland wish to be fully independent and self-governing.

        2. They will do this by fully submitting to the EU as a tiny client state with essentially no power over anything.

        Bloody genius. Who writes this stuff?

      • 253
        English_Channel says:

        How about charging the guests who stay too long in the hotel or recommending a cheaper alternative over the border in Scotland?

  8. 11
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Gordon is not doing the work that taxpayers pay him to do.

  9. 12
    Raving Loon says:

    He may not show up to parliament, but the bigger problem is that he is still within 3000 miles of the UK, that’s the bigger problem we need to address.

  10. 13
    The Last Quango in Paris says:

    So we pay him a wage to do sod all and when he does sod all and even his extraordinarily patient constituents begin to get fed up, he calls up the editor when he could be doing constituency work to complain that they are reporting that he does sod all? I bet we even paid for the phone call.

    Someone that petty and vain, who worries about what people think when he is creaming millions elsewhere, is a psycho surely?

  11. 15
    Geoffrey Brooking says:


    I was told that on Gordon’s Parliament answerphone (via 020 7219 3000) it asks to pass on details to a Gordon and Sarah Brown e mail address.

    Is this allowed???

  12. 16
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Is that a picture of McDoom wishing Milibandwagon all the best on his relaunch :-)

  13. 17
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’ve started in America.

  14. 19
    Bill d'Sarse says:

    I’m impressed. It takes some doing to throw a Nokia all the way from China* to Scotchland.

    * or other country where he is unknown and relies upon the fact he was a PM to boost his own, substantial coffers.

  15. 21
    Sue says:

    Don’t blame me.

  16. 22
    Jess The Dog says:

    I think Gordon Brown is one of the few MPs not to bother Tweeting (or even to have someone else do it for him). His human shield Sarah appears to do all the tweeting, “charidee” stuff which in turn is a fig-leaf for promoting Brown’s book.


    Might be worth a Tweet to Sarah to ask her when the Once Dear Leader will be treading the Esplanade and the streets of Raith.

    This isn’t just political mischief-making. Lots of anger up here. Even his next-door MP Lindsay Roy (who owes his seat to Brown) is angry at the statistics, although he includes some token Con-Dem cuts-bashing.

  17. 23
    AC1 says:

    Mr Salmond, build up that Dyke!

    We need a Tartan curtain splitting this island. With a Nokia Defense Initiative to protect against the monocular moron.

  18. 29
    Well it's a thought says:

    This piece of crap apart from sending to the Hague with his mate Tony isn’t really worth commenting about, he’s a nonentity an MP who gets paid for doing nothing, a has been, something that you scrape from your foot.

    And I don’t like him.

  19. 30
    Hugh Janus says:

    And shame on the editor who is reported to have ‘compromised’ during his conversation with McBust. By all means correct any factual errors, but beyond that no paper should go. All a hang-over from NuLiebore’s bully-boy tactics, no doubt.

    • 108
      Gonk says:

      Indeed, what could frighten him ? Incoming spittle, Balls trashing his office,
      cancellation of public sector job adverts.

  20. 31
    gildedtumbril says:

    Eva braun the wee scots jessie, now absentee of Fife is a sack of shite, a traitor and an inexorable arsehole. I hate the bastard.
    Seldom in the annals of political chicanery has such a vile traitor surfaced. Words can hardly be found to describe that shitbag. Were he human he would be a disgrace to humanity.

  21. 33
    Your contractual hero is a bully says:
  22. 34
    Ed Tourette says:

    At least he’s not troughing subsidised steak and haggis in Westminster…- shag, bollox, soapy titty wank!

  23. 35
    She's back says:
  24. 37
    Someone needs to put this vile bully in his place says:

    I don’t understand why the editor didn’t just call Brown out on his bullying? The Hunt isn’t prime minister anymore, he has no power. If I’d been the editor, I’d have said “Sorry but we have editorial independence. Goodbye” and put the phone down and then published an article about his attempt to bully the paper.

    • 58
      How to deal with Bullies says:

      I would have taped the twat and sent the tape to SKY

      • 75
        Gordon, stroking his cat says:

        I’ve got enough dirt on the local rag newspapers and their poxy little editors to fill a dozen skips. Don’t forget, I’m the one who saved the world and I’m the one who can destroy it too… MOOOOHAHAHAHAHAHA!

        • 146
          South of the M4 says:

          It is not that you have enough – it is that you still have friends who can generate enough *hit to trash a business if you don”t like it. This country has still not rid itself of this evil *astard.

  25. 39
    Desperate Dan says:

    Alex Salmond won’t be around forever. One day an independent Scotland might have a PM like Mad Dog Brown.

    • 43
      McFinger on the button says:

      Best we repatriate Trident from Faslane when they go their own way or we would have to do what we are told or be nuked.

      • 56
        What the Inglish havent considered #45 says:

        Do you fancy filling the Lake District with Nukes do ya ?

        • 142
          jgm2 says:

          Fucking Scotland will be like our Guantanamo Bay. We’ll just bung Fidel Salmond a few quid and ring fence Faslane.

          Mind you. Fucking Scotland is already like Guantanamo Bay. Filled with surly fuckers who hate the fact that they’re living in such squalor and dreaming of the life they think they should be living what with all that oil they’ve got. And the only reason they’re not living this imaginary perfect life… well, it couldn’t be their own indolence and incompetence and fuckwittery, fuck no, it must be some body elses fault.

          Aye. Fucking Scotland is the British Guantanamo.

          • Atar says:

            Much of Scotland is a dump.
            Quality of life and life expectancy is poor.

            Scotland has willingly voted for and been run by lefties for decades.

            Spot the connection?

            Correct! it’s the fault of the English!

          • Another Engineer says:

            The sad thing is that I actually like most parts of Scotland.

            Perhaps the thing to do is to reactivate the two major fault lines – the Highland Boundary fault and the Southern Uplands Boundary fault, and tow the middle out into the Atlantic where it can be disposed of. Glasgow, Edinburgh, Cumbernauld, the Fearty from Fife, all of it. We’d be left with just the hilly bits. Half the Highlands is populated by English already, and the border country is mostly just sensible rugby playing farmers.

            I can’t see the people of Shetland seeing much difference between being ruled from Edinburgh or being ruled from London, when they are much nearer to Norway than both.

      • 72
        The Beast of the Embassy club says:

        no point
        the septics have to give permission before a nuke is fired
        they have the codes
        bollocks to whats in the capts safe
        they dont get fired without american say so
        ooops i just breached the official secrets act

        • 83

          Technically that’s true.
          But if you have the missile keys the pin is 6.6.6.
          Its easy to remember. Its the same number as Ed Balls’ extension at Westminster.

          • Grumpy Old Man says:

            So the one septic in the boat finds himself facing the skipper and a few healthy marines and says.”no, you can’t have the key” Right, yeah.

          • annette curton says:

            I’ve seen the films, the code for mutual assured destruction must be Bo (Obamas Portuguese water dog), any fool could work it out.

        • 90
          Grumpy Old Man says:

          No point. The nukes can move to Pompey, where the crews will have a decent lifestyle in a friendly country.

          • The Beast of the Embassy club says:

            its verbal mr grumpy
            The blessed late Ronnie Reagan was prepared to give them to the even more blessed *bows* Lady T so that we could nuke the Argies if needed
            we should have just done it for a laugh and a test fire

  26. 41
    Anonymous says:

    +2760672 raised to the power of 1000
    Multiplied by 18763.9 trillion

  27. 42
    Sarah Brown says:

    hmmm…. I don’t recognise that lipstick he’s wearing…..

  28. 45
    Ha hah says:

    Angus MacNeil talking bollocks.

    MP from sedentary position:

    “How stupid can you be?”

    tee hee.

  29. 46
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Brown’s last appearance in The Commons was to stick the boot into Murdoch, other than that what has that gormless Hunt been doing since the GE which kicked him out.

    He kept on about politicians earnings from second jobs, and how unethical that was, but once he left office, he seems to have forgotten what his role is vis a vis his hapless constituency.

    The great thing about Gordon Brown is this, he is no longer Prime Minister.

  30. 49
    gripper stebson says:

    what a doosh bag, the mans got no fucking idea has he?

  31. 52
    Kim Jong-Ed says:

    “Who ever is the next Prime Minister will have a deficit to reduce and less money to spend”

    Why is Ed fighting the last election again, though I suppose it could be considered progress for Labour.

  32. 54
    Andrew Efiong says:

    The people of Kirkaldy are mugs for keeping this guy in office.

  33. 62
    Let 'em eat oatcakes says:

    Brown couldn’t care tuppence for his constituency. His stuck with it. He’ll take the pay, of course. That’s what Scotsmen are good at.

    In his narcissism he wanted to win the General Election but, of course, needed to be an MP to remain Prime Minister.

    All that is now over. But, for the sake of Sarah’s pin money, there won’t be a by-election soon.

    Absentee MP.

    • 129
      Primrose Hill Marxist says:

      He’s just on the sick, but in a posh way.

      Most of his constituents would applaud this course of action.

  34. 63
    Lizzie says:

    “After a calm negotiation the paper claims that a “compromise about future articles” from Gordon was reached”

    It is understood from an inside source that the Courier agreed to withdraw *this* article about him on condition that Gordon Brown stopped wasting their time sending them unpublishable articles that nobody is interested in and start wasting other people’s time instead if he must.

    Though not part of the agreement it is understood the Courier suggested he send his writings to the Independent, on the basis that if they’ll publish Johann Hari they’ll publish anybody, no matter how discredited.

    • 76

      Hari isn’t the only plagiariser.
      If you look at Gordon’s ‘Save the world’ dossier it says ‘property of Sweden’ on the back. Its just their old banking plan with a new cover on it.

      look at the index notes.

      For use in a domestic style banking crisis only.
      Do not over inflate money supply.
      Not intended for international bailouts.
      May cause depression if abused.
      Plan works best with large cash and gold reserves.
      Unsuitable for countries attempting to nationalise if those countries are already laden with uncontrollable debts.
      Not for sale in Scotland

      • 84
        The Beast of the Embassy club says:

        He bought it from IKEA

        Its shit and falls apart whenever subjected to any kind of stress

      • 115
        AC1 says:

        IS the the Sweden that for a short time had a tobin tax, and it was a massive disaster?

  35. 68
    Gordon Brown says:


  36. 74
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    C u n t z like Brown is the main reason we need to rid ourselves of the jocks. However, Westminster needs to pass a law that doesn’t allow any skirt wearing shirt lifters from north of the border to be an MP or Minister in England or all the c u n t z will come down here.

    Who the fuck wasnt sto be leaders of Scotland? Like the US President will give a shit.

    • 77
      The Beast of the Embassy club says:

      McMental chased the current one through a kitchen to try and say hello
      It resulted in a very nice put down

      “Prime Mentalist Brown is faintly depressing”

      The tw at cant even manage to depress a person properly

      Oh and then he berated his staff for not getting him a meeting with Mr Omaha all whilst wearing his undies and socks and nothing else
      No wonder Sarah drinks from the furry cup and then murders his offspring

    • 134
      Anonymous says:

      I agree why import shirt lifters from up here when you have world class ones of your own, indeed you have a healthy supply of your own c u n t z as well.

  37. 78
    Xavier Onassis says:

    Can’t someone administer a lethal injection to the old maniac on the grounds that his future quality of life is likely to be sad and useless?

  38. 82
    Anonymous says:

    That fucking twat fucked up most pensions and for that he deserves a good fucking. Nah! the twat would love it!!

  39. 86
    Truisms R Us says:

    An MP with more than one job? Shocking. It shouldn’t be allowed.

    • 121
      nellnewman says:

      I don’t think there’s a problem with mp’s having more than one job, although I personally don’t agree with that. In gordy’s case, apparently, he spent at least 100 days last year on other work and abroad. That’s nearly a half of the mp’s working year for which he was paid in full.

      A bit extreme to say the least.

  40. 89
    annette curton says:

    Only more confirmation of what most people others already know, that Gordon is a thoroughly nasty piece of work, he probably threatened to refer the Fife Courier to the Leveson enquiry or get them evicted from their premises the Scottish Gobfather.

  41. 102

    I’m amazed Gordon was at home long enough to read the Courier between trousering millions on the global verbal diarrhoea circuit ….

  42. 104
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:
    • 113
      gripper stebson says:

      could you please let me have the name of your acountant tony, ive read that hes very good, you tax dodgeing country wrecking shyster

    • 114
      nellnewman says:

      King Abdullah has a bemused expression on his face in that photo that seems to say

      “who is this grinning idiot?”

      Although actually he should be asking himself ‘how much is he going to charge me for this handshake and photo opportunity?” – he’ll find out soon enough when he gets a windrush invoice!

      • 135
        Axe The Telly Tax says:

        Abdullah is thinking to himself “Should i really be shaking hands with a war criminal”

        He should also check to make sure his wedding ring is still there :-)

    • 117
      Joss Taskin says:

      Any sign of the WMD in Jordan ??

    • 122
      Gonk says:

      Typical fraudulent, Politician braced handshake. Hey, you’d trust those guys.

      • 151
        The Paragnostic says:

        Abdullah’s holding Tony’s elbow to make sure the grinning picaninnie doesn’t walk off with his fingers.

  43. 107
    Anonymous says:

    It’s good to see the hapless ex Prime Mincer back, Ed is just plain boring and doesn’t entertain me at all. McMoron is like an evil lunatic Captain Mainwaring, puffed up with his own self importance and out to do it his way, no matter how fucking mental that is.

    • 118
      nellnewman says:

      Too true!!

      I still get a laugh out of that incident where gordy threw a paddy in that Newyork hotel in his underpants because his aides couldn’t get him an interview with omaha.

      There’s nothing in politics that’s anywhere near as entertaining as gordy and his tantrums.

      • 141
        Tessa Tickles says:

        Ed Miliband’s endless relaunches are pretty amusing. Today’s gormless attempt to impersonate Tony Blair was pretty funny, too.

        For real comedy value, though, you need either Nick Clegg saying the euro veto was a good/bad/good/very bad thing, or David Cameron trying and failing to justify the new £33billion rail link.

        Sod it, just douse them all in petrol and chuck a lit Zippo at them. That really would be funny.

        • 144
          jgm2 says:

          A 33bn quid railway line that’s only 100 miles long? Are they using what’s left of the Gold to make the rails or something?

          It’s at times like this you realise the genius of the Sainted Thatch when she refused to spend a nickel on the Euro tunnel. The frogs are still bailing the fucking thing out.

          It wouldn’t cost that much money to tunnel to Fucking Edinburgh. You could tunnel to the centre of the earth for that kind of money – with the upside that you’d have no end of geothermal power too.

          £33bn quid? Can they not just double-decker the trains for a fraction of that money?

          • The Paragnostic says:

            It would have been cheaper, but apparently Cheryl Gillan insisted on Welsh slate tiles for her bit of tunnel.

            And the Grauniad is reporting that the tunnels will be “green”, whatever that means – so probably twice s expensive and half as good as a real tunnel.

          • let the taxpayer take the strain says:

            It would be cheaper to buy a rolls royce,and chaffeur, for every single person in the uk who wants them.

          • Infuriated of West Mids says:

            Fuck! That’s actually true when you think about it!

          • smoggie says:

            The £33bn costs includes the two links north of Birmingham. The London – Birmingham link is a mere £17bn. Peanuts.

            Of course these are just estimates not actual costs. And as everyone knows with estimates for major engineering projects you need to multiply the estimate by a factor of four or five to get a realistic number.

          • smoggie says:

            The £33bn costs includes the two links north of Birmingham. The London – Birmingham link is a mere £17bn. Pe­anuts.

            Of course these are just estimates not actual costs. And as everyone knows with estimates for major engineering projects you need to multiply the estimate by a factor of four or five to get a realistic number.

          • Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

            Can you imagine how expensive the tickets are going to be? This is not for ordinary people to use. Ordinary people are not going to benefit from this project – construction companies are.

  44. 110
    Ms E West says:

    You f.in lot don’t belong ‘ere an shud be f.in locked up and so shud that Brarn bloke what let the f.in lot in. E shud be locked up fer his arn f.in safety init?

  45. 111
    nellnewman says:

    hmmm. gordy in by-election threat.

    I don’t think so. He’s always been a man renowned for incontinence in public spending and miserliness in respect of his own money.

    Can you see him resigning the mp’s job he’s not even being pressured (not really) to do and in the process giving up £65 pa salary / £100k+ office expenses / £40k pa thereabouts of other expenses.

    Money for old rope. Why would he throw it up?!

    • 130
      Fabians are Evil says:

      Forget the “money for old rope” if there is to be a hanging I’ll supply a new one

      • 136
        Tessa Tickles says:

        If my work brought me into contact with Brown, I’d use the opportunity to put that rope around his neck and throttle him before he could call for help.

        I’d then apologise at my trial for killing him too quickly.

        • 137
          Fabians are Evil says:

          kick away a small chair so there is not enough ‘drop’ to snap the bastards fat greasy neck – let him dance and kick for 15 mins – doing the ‘Tyburn Jig’

          Sell tickets so we can have a good old sing whilst he jigs to the tune

          “Things can only get better”

          • Tessa Tickles says:

            15 minutes? Way too short!

            A friend of mine recalled a story about police recovering a body from a Thames bridge many years ago. The deceased guy had hanged himself with barbed wire. But he’d done it at low tide, and it didn’t kill him. His feet were in the mud. He spent (I would guess) about 3 hours struggling to free himself (he’d cleverly tied his hands behind his back before dropping), and then the tide came in. Slowly. And, eventually, he drowned.

            All the time struggling, lacerating his neck, in what – we must assume – was absolute agony.

            That’s what Brown really deserves. And I’d make sure the water was saline.

    • 140
      jgm2 says:

      Indeed. Gets to bill double for the connecting flights via London too. Once as expenses to ‘represent’ his constituents and again as expenses for giving incomprehensibly dull lectures to foreigners who assume that the PM of the UK could not possibly be a complete imbecile.

      And look, he’s only 25% of the pr*i*ce of Tony Blair.

      Don’t forget to print off two receipts Sarah!

  46. 128
    Gordon Brown says:

    I jerk my own chicken.

  47. 158
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Ed Miliband says he doesn’t want the elderly taken advantage of.

    So why did he allow the one eyed twat from Fife to rape their pensions then?

  48. 163
    Gordon Brown says:

    I like rheum with a hue.

  49. 164
    I hate Blue Labour says:

    No power, or influence. Politically impotent, and the consigned to history as the only PM to never win an election.

    So: why don’t editors just tell him to piss off?

    • 168
      nellnewman says:

      labour always amazes me – how they hang on to seriously failing leaders.

      The truth is that militwit is firmly entrenched now, in the public consciousness, as a union puppet, a labour spend freak and a man with no policies and a blank sheet of paper, that he can never now turn the tide of public opinion in his and labour’s favour.

      Look forward to many more failed relaunches between now and 2015.

      • 174
        Tachybaptus says:

        I wish I could be as sure as you, Nell. Yes, in the eyes of the media and of those in the Westminster bubble he is a dead millipede. But the public takes no notice of such things. People vote Labour for traditional reasons, and will go on doing so no matter what creature is in charge of the party. Labour is ahead in the polls by enough to secure an overall majority. As the wretched Cameron flounders, its lead will probably increase. At the same time, Labour lacks the will to depose its leader. Add those together and you’re looking at our next prime minister. A dismal prospect indeed.

        In a way, I wish that Labour had won the last election. We would get the inevitable national collapse over sooner, and perhaps — just perhaps — something better might emerge.

        • 190
          jgm2 says:

          In a way, I wish that Labour had won the last election. We would get the inevitable national collapse over sooner, and perhaps — just perhaps — something better might emerge.

          Every time that thought enters my head it is immediately followed by the mental picture of the Maximum Imbecile swaggering around with a ‘mandate’ to go total retard with the UK economy. Print 200bn quid to generate 0.1% growth? Pah, why not print 2,000 billion quid and generate 50% ‘growth’?

          Be careful what you wish for.

          You’re right about us being in a bit of a bubble as regards Vacant Ned. All most voters see are the carefully edited bits on the BBC news which are designed to show him in the best possible lights. His vacuous mouthings all unchallenged. His weekly hazing at PMQ from Cameron kept secret from the voters.

          In the interests of ‘balance’ you understand. Because of the unique way the BBC is funded.

          But little by little, just like the Maximum Imbecile, and especially in the four week run up to election time, there will be nowhere for him to hide. He’ll have his Bigot-gate or his Kinnock flat-on-his-arse moment. I hope.

          • Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

            I fear that by that time, Miliband D. will have taken control and we’ll all be doomed.

  50. 166
    Oh Brother says:

    I take it that when David Miliband described his little bruv’s speech as “Important and powerful ” he was taking the piss.

  51. 167
    Jack Dromey says:

    15 mins less to Brum and 15 mins less back from Brum. Fucking fantastic that’s half an hour less I have to spend in that shit hole of my constituency.

  52. 176
    Medium sweet popcorn says:

    I hope you’ve all got your popcorn ready for tomorrow’s pmqs. I almost feel sorry for Ed. Not really. Cameron has enough ammo to do the pmqs equivalent of happy slapping. Best of all, when Ed stands, the cheers of Labour MPs will be drowned out by the cheers from the govt benches.

  53. 177
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of says:

    Why does the government tolerate this blatant abuse of position and fraudulent
    claiming of taxpayers money ?

    Oh i know it’s because they all do it !

  54. 178
    Bye bye Scotchland says:

    Well thanks to Alex Salmond come 2014 Gordon won’t be a Westminster MP anyway.

    Rock on Tommy.

    • 182
      Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:


  55. 179
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:


  56. 180
    nellnewman says:


    diversity and equality Oh Dear!! labour’s legacy from 13 years of mismanagement.

    And this manipulative woman will be looking to claim mega £s for the imagined offence against her.

    Another local government worker troughing off the taxpayer. Is there no end to their creative money making schemes ??!!

  57. 183
    RBS says:

    So what currency will the Jocks use?

    Scotch pound?

  58. 184
    Russ Abbot for new MP of Fife says:

    My favourite Scotsman is Russ Abbot’s See You Jimmy.

  59. 185
    Dead Ed says:

    Newsnight looking at Ed’s disastrous speech. David Grossman just said it seemed more like the speech of a new leader rather than relaunch.

  60. 186
    Dead Ed says:

    Just catching up with Ed’s speech. It’s actually remarkable how much he’s imitating, whether intentionally or not, Blair’s mannerisms and vocal tics.

    • 192
      jgm2 says:

      Worked for Blair. Worked for Obama. Might work for Vacant Ned too.

      God help us.

    • 193
      Its all very embarrassing says:

      Lol yes I know its so transparent as he’s clearly getting coached by eejits who take us for fools. Its all very embarrassing.

    • 200
      T.B£iar, the People's Messiah says:

      You mean the estuary English vowels, the artificially casual dropping of certain consonants, the mock sincerity as Ed sways slightly with his arms outstretched and the faux passion as he attempts to ‘engage’ with his audience and work in some trite soundbites….

      Who is he trying to copy ?? Ya know, I was a regular kinda guy and I could feel the hand of history on my shoulder…..

  61. 188
    I Think says:

    I think I can sit easy with Dave’s train set now that he has put in the extra tunnels. At least there will be something to show for the spending unlike Gordon’s bank bailout.

    What I’d really like to see though is Boris Island airport and a Severn tidal barrage as these projects would really contribute to Britain’s economy and our departure from the political EUSSR and only membership of the single market.

  62. 189
    Dead Ed says:

    Rachel Reeves just dropped a massive clunker on Newsnight. She said Labour wouldn’t reverse any of the govt’s cuts! Esler said “So the govt hasn’t done anything that’s so bad that you’d have to reverse it?” Pure gold.

  63. 191
    Dead Ed says:

    Guido really needs to upload this Rachel Reeves interview on Newsnight. It’s hilarious. She said Labour will reform capitalism. Esler: “What do you mean by ‘reforming capitalism’?!”

    • 194
      horse head says:

      refawmin capatalisummm

    • 196
      Gerald says:

      The truth is very few politicians can make a difference. Churchill, Thatcher and Blair were the exceptions

      • 197
        jgm2 says:

        Blair made a difference? In the same way that Mugabe made a difference.

        Destroyed a perfectly good economy. Arse-fucked it for no reason at all other than his inability to fire the Maximum Imbecile.

        • 199
          James says:

          Think you will find Blair’s Chancellor Brown and his advisor Balls destroyed the economy.

        • 223
          not a machine says:

          mmm I think you will find Blair was PM when the ruin sold off half the gold reserves , Labour were handed very good set of books in 1997 , up until about 2004 it was sustainable , but alas the lefty madness had already spawned its wonk , the rest as some historians are now comming to terms as explaining , was about fooling us all in what they were actually doing off balance sheet and destroying

    • 207
      Ed Balls, Shallow Chancer says:

      But look, Gordon and I abolished Boom and Bust so I can easily reform capitalism. I’d do it in my first Budget.

  64. 198
    Ken says:

    Should be an entertaining Sky paper review. Bonnie Greer and Kelvin Makenzie

    • 248
      Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

      Would have been better if Ann Diamond had doubled up with Kelvin.

  65. 208
    robbie says:

    So Brown is having a go at that national treasure of courageous reporting, the Dundee Courier,whose famous headline after the Titanic sank was “Local man feared drowned” ?

    It’ll be the freesheet weekly advertiser next….

  66. 210
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Why the fuck is that mong run company ‘Go Compare’ still running their Christmas advert?

    All their adverts are fucking shit, but they really are lazy twats.

    How the fuck can they afford to run so many adverts, please tell me no one uses this mong run company?

    • 213
      Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

      I have used them before my credit card stopped working proparly

      • 216
        Infuriated of West Mids says:

        It probably stopped working because the bank realised you were pretending to be Billy.

  67. 212
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Sadly, at the General Election Gordon Brown’s character, strengths and weakness were abundantly clear to all.
    Knowing this, if the electorate still chose to vote him back in, then they had got exactly what they deserved.
    Wouldn’t it be refreshing if we could bring ourselves to judge our politicians on their ability and dedication to serve their electorate rather than on party lines.
    Oh happy day!

    • 215
      Infuriated of West Mids says:

      Sadly, it’s clear you’re not Billy. Oddly, though, you make a very good point which Billy may well actually agree with.

      So why not post under your own name?

  68. 220
  69. 222
    not a machine says:

    Interesting thoughts …. civillian spec Chinnoks are £20mn each order 500 say total £10bn fit em out to take 50 people a time , charge £100 ret , should handle 25000 people a day Brum to london , and make about £1000 per trip at about half cost of HS2 ……………… be cheaper and not clogg Euston up , Tra laa

    • 224
      Tachybaptus says:

      And if they have one of their notorious gearbox failures and the rotor blades collide and chop each other off as they are passing over Milton Keynes, well, that’s life.

    • 246
      JH says:

      The Mussies in Brum would probably start firing RPGs at them as they tried to land.

      Instinct, innit bruvver.

  70. 228
    albacore says:

    Dissed by even the council and the local rag
    Gordon’s reputation’s got no lower to sag
    But it’s he who laughs last is the one that laughs best
    Give it three more years and then put it to the test
    If you thought that Brown was as bad as it could get
    Look what we’re stuffed with now. You ain’t seen nuthin’ yet

  71. 230
    It Can Now Be Revealed! says:

    Prime Minister David Cameron referred to Ed Balls, Shadow Chancellor of the Exchequer, as being afflicted with Tourette’s Syndrome. The PM was quick to apologise after being pressurised to do so by sufferers of the disease who felt the remark to be flippant. As it happens, the PM knew something that he didn’t let on, that there was an actual tape of Ed Balls working as a weatherman during his supposed “educational” sojourn in the US. You saw it here first!

  72. 244
    I don't need no doctor says:

    All over europe you can see modern roads, moder railways, modern bridges etc. All of these are high tech beautiful architectural structures. Take as an example the Millau bridge in France, incredible.
    Do all of those against the proposed HS railway travel by horse and cart? Progress should be welcomed otherwise we would have no motorways, no railways, no air travel.
    We can’t live in the past.

    • 245
      Axe The Telly Tax says:

      I have no objection to high speed rail as long as the taxpayer isn’t footing the bill.

      Ask yourself why aren’t investment bank in the city or abroad queuing up to invest in high speed rail here in the UK?

      And why aren’t the yanks building them?

    • 250
      I'm Poverished says:

      They also have double-deck passenger trains and their fares are affordable. Buy a return ticket from Manchester to London and see your wallet deflate. Rail travel in the UK is a rip-off. Journey times are often no different to those achieved in 1900. It’s a national disgrace.

      HS2 = H2S

  73. 252
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I feel like fucking shit today.

    Who’s up for anal?

    • 255
      Fabians are Evil says:

      Just a thought…….. but does it not fill you with horror to understand that that mad unelected bastard Brown actually had his finger on the UK’s Nuclear trigger?

      • 256
        Fabians are Evil says:

        Not that they would have gone off if he pushed the required ‘button’

      • 268
        50 Calibre says:

        The very thought of Gordon F Brown’s fingers on anything at all fills me with horror.

        After ho stole a big chunk of my pension I would have happily voted for Sharia Law in the hope that Gordon F Brown would have had to resort to chewing his toenails instead.

        What an appalling bag of shit he was and still is…

  74. 266
  75. 271
    Anonymous says:

    Greedy Brown strikes again. Representing his interest.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Kevin Maguire on the less than electrifying Ed Miliband…

“I bet if you went into a pub tonight and started a conversation about ­politics you’d hear strong opinions. David Cameron would be out of touch and Nick Clegg despised while Nigel Farage would divide people sharply. Miliband? In a lot of boozers he’d be the fourth most interesting man in British politics.”

Alexrod says:

It’s money innit.

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