December 14th, 2011

Miliband’s Media Grid Shelved After PMQs Mess

Ed got the inevitable thrashing at PMQs, though it was clearly worse than they expected. Yesterday Labour media grid was leaked, yet today we can see that they’ve had to throw it out of the window after a dire morning. The faces lined up for the media today were Harman, Chuka Umunna and Ed Miliband, yet Balls had to be sent to Millbank to clean up immediately after Ed’s defeat. How bad must it be when Blinky is the mop-up man… 


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Or Maybe the leaked grid was wrong?

  2. 2
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    Will it affect me in any way, dear?

  3. 3
    BillyBob... says:

    Just a bunch of spinners and liars……

  4. 4
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    The lights are going out all over the Liebore party.


  5. 5
  6. 6
    Anonymous says:

    If Ed M is still in place as leader in 2 yrs time, we should see the LibDems overtake them in the opinion polls..

  7. 7
    BerkBot says:

    ORDER, old lady! I’ll have you removed.

  8. 8
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Oh Guido/Neo Guido

    Can i just say (as last pmqs today and l/chat) a big thanks to you , Neo and all those that assist with the running and modding of the live chat feature, and also to all other window lickers that take part.

    Thanks Guido and co :-)

  9. 9
    BillyBob... says:

    Some things in life encourage the dark side of the mind to show through, seeing that photo of that person is one of them.

  10. 10
    Mrs Miliband says:

    Dear editor,

    Ed can’t appear on the show today because he came home crying from PMQs with a large skid*mark on his pants.

    He’s upsatairs srubbing his keks with a brillopad as we speak

    Good bye

  11. 11
    Shire Tory says:


  12. 12
    BillyBob... says:

    No, just a near one party state as we had in the mid eighties :)

  13. 13
    I Hate Tesco AND the Pope says:

    Inside info from Number Ten staffer under Bliar and the One-Eyed Scottish Moron: Harriet Harman is bigoted, stubborn and blessed with lower than average intelligence. No surprise there, then.

  14. 14
    Loungelizard says:

    Sadly Elsie Ed Balls has already happened, we just have to hope he doesn’t happen again. Tea trolly will be along in about twenty minutes.

  15. 15
    Anonymous says:

    Is Cameron’s collar getting a bit tight?

  16. 16
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    Thank you, dear. I’m parched.

  17. 17
    BillyBob... says:

    BB you are being very generous in showing your lurvvvvv to everyone today, take it easy with the sherry bottle !

    Plus 1 on the ‘Thanks Guido and co” message :)

  18. 18
    annette curton says:

    Not got your T-shirt yet then?.

  19. 19
    Rat's arse says:

    Seconded Billy. PMQ’s is thoroughly enjoyable and Guido’s blog gives us all the opportunity to vent our spleen. So Guido, like Billy says…….. a great big thank you. :)

  20. 20
    BillyBob... says:

    Too many slap up meals over in Europe where the gravy train never stops, other than taking on more of our money.

  21. 21
    Unfit 4 Purpose says:

    Why don’t they just sack Ed? He is clearly not capable of doing the job.

    Not that the Tories would want him to go though.

  22. 22
    I go off on a bender says:

    +1 Billy. I thought the modding today was spot-on: firm but fair.

  23. 23
    annette curton says:

    How much longer can you go on being 83 and a quarter?.

  24. 24
    Alcoholic McPoison still can't resist spreading rumours says:

  25. 25
    Wingco says:

    Certainly is. His wife needs to buy him some bigger collars and have them well starched. He looked an absolute shambles at PMQs with his collar flapping outside his jacket.

  26. 26
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    As long as you can go on twitching, dear.

  27. 27
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Well it’s not as if we are brothers!

  28. 28
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    !3 jobs lost in the public sector
    for each one created in the private sector

    Cameron you bastard you promised us at least 25% cuts
    That figure should be 25 lost for ever one created !

  29. 29
    She's of subnormal intelligence. Her username was Harriet and her password was Harman. says:

  30. 30
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    With Labour it’s always worse than we thought- for 13 years it was worse for us, for the last 21months it’s been worse for them.

  31. 31
    Loungelizard says:

    Sack Ed… you crazy man? the unions would come out on strike! then where would we be.

  32. 32
    Dave Figgley says:

    Ha ha, mate. We know that but how are your thirst-levels Elsie, gal?

  33. 33
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Caroline Flint on the Daily Politics. Her face looked like a bull dog licking piss off a thistle. She is still in denial, rude and a loser. I notice she wasn’t stolen during the riots, some window dressing.

  34. 34
    Ungrateful and not quite dead says:

    I’d throw my colostomy bag at this pigs arse it if was full, just wait till later. As an old f*cker I can get in close to Labour Shits like this as they think you’re all so grateful to them. Send the c_nt over I’ll show him what real quantative easing looks like.

  35. 35
    Raving Loon says:

    Labour don’t do Economics, they never have, and they never will.

    Also, they (and the Lib Dems, BBC, Guardian, and the lentil eating class in general) berate the Tories for being “isolated” in Europe, yet what they fail to realise is that Cameron’s proverbial flibbing of the bird to the EU is a vote winner. The more they criticise this act of defiance, the more it makes them look “isolated”.

  36. 36
    Anonymous says:

    We have an election in just one seat tomorrow, it will be interesting to see how things go.

    Cameron wasn’t even able to get a majority against Brown even when economy was in a bad shape. Cameron is very good at one liners as he doesn’t answer the question or just lie but he is bad at every thing else.

  37. 37
    tube-thumper says:

    i feel i must post just for the sake of it.

    this boring blog has no glue anymore

    time to get the dynamite under guido’s arse and blow the twot up for good.

    Advertisers? why? a very few eyeballs here. stickiness yes but mostly in fatty fawkes trousers

  38. 38
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    Is it really that long ago that I voted for the nazis, dear? My, how time passes!

  39. 39
    annette curton says:

    Don’t call me Deer.

  40. 40
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    They need to put her back in the “shop window”
    With all the other dummies !

  41. 41
    Osric Testicles says:

    Thanks Anonastooge, think that goes down as clutching at straws, your media grid really is all over the place. Back to simpering at your masters feet.

  42. 42
    Fish says:

    Same on Monday. Is he allowed to wear a button-down?

  43. 43
    The Paragnostic says:

    An election in what is, when all is said and done, the modern equivalent of a “rotten borough” – a seat filled to the rafters with Labour client voters, with a candidate parachuted in due to her subcontinental credentials.

    I’m surprised they haven’t replaced party names with pictures to make the voters feel at home.

    The only interesting thing about the election will be whether UKIP manage to beat the LibDums – a Labour victory is all but assured due to demographics.

  44. 44
    annette curton says:

    That’s just a reprise of this mornings Breakfast TV.

  45. 45
    Loungelizard says:

    Of course she’s dear, keeping old Elsie in a care home must be costing someone a fortune, just hope it’s not us.

  46. 46
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    That’s the spirit, dear. Sticky S t a i n e s has become even fatter whilst resting on his laurels, hasn’t he, Mr. Thumper? By the way: my Reg (God bless) quite enjoyed his glue.

  47. 47
    cynic says:

    Never use a foreign loo – as my old Gran used to say

  48. 48
    Wayne Rooney says:

    What are you doing tonight, darlin’?

  49. 49
    Fcuk Off Testicles Youre a Fag says:

    Bollox to Balls

  50. 50
    Colin the Meek says:

    He looks much nicer in his uniform.

  51. 51
    Loungelizard says:

    In Amsterdam?

  52. 52
    Anonymous says:

    Even before the voting you accept Labour win.

    I though UKIP will be 3rd but after last Friday it will be 4th or 5th. But it doesn’t matter as LD is useless as UKIP.

    Even the useless Greens has a MP.

  53. 53
    Smig says:

    Not spending about £100 million for each day that the bedwetters and boxtickers are on strike.

    Let them walk. The last time there was an “industrial action” (feck knows what industry most of these morons claim to represent) the gobshites on a picket near to me buggered off to the pub at 11.30 because they were cold.

  54. 54
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    Wasn’t this programme trending on Twitter, dear? What have our people come to since being deprived of their senses?

  55. 55
    Colin the Meek says:

    See, I told you, this alleged veto was NOT out of principle but solely for selfish dietary reasons.

  56. 56

    Charlie the plumber


  57. 57

    Just taken delivery of my new elephant gun. A .600 Nitro Express cartridge with a bullet that weighs 900 grains. It produces energy of 5,413 ft lbf and has a velocity of 1646 ft/s from a distance of 100 yards.

    Was looking for something to practice on when … oh look …

    Bang !!!!

    Got the bastard!

  58. 58
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

  59. 59
    Goddess, Empress, Dictator Frau Merkel says:

    I have instructed my Limp-Dumb hamsters to record the names of everyone abusing my Labour poodles. They will pay when I take control.

  60. 60
    annette curton says:

    I’m sure your Reg (God bless) was never glueless.

  61. 61
    The Paragnostic says:

    Some good news – that thieving bitch Uddin is to be banned from the HoL until she pays back the 125,000 she owes:

  62. 62
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    Oh, the same as usual, dear: half a sherry and some gentle knitting whilst keeping an eye on you young gentlemen fingering your qwertys.

  63. 63


    Fucking wasn’t me!!

  64. 64
    Special Ed says:

    Please please take that back. I look forward to PMQs more than ever before. The man does more damage to the Labour party than any conservative leader could ever do!

  65. 65
    The Paragnostic says:

    Right in the Balls?

  66. 66
    Special Ed says:

    I’d personally be willing to pay an extra 10 to 20% to see the back of Red Ken.

  67. 67
    annette curton says:

    You just did, stupid C*nt.

  68. 68

    Good start but should be plus interest and charges at least…

  69. 69
    Anonymous says:

    If you want to flush your money through the toilet call his company, there are local plumber who would do it cheaper.

    As for him going to India, 99.9999999% of the houses hasn’t go hot water or heating. 80% hasn’t got a tap. In India you can get a good plumber for less than £2 a day.

    He will do very well in India, let him go.

  70. 70
    Special Ed says:

    If Ed is still in place in 2 years, they’ll be polling behind the bloody greens!

  71. 71
    Special Ed says:

    Agreed. Really enjoyed PMQs today. Might have had something to do with Ed’s stellar performance though.

  72. 72
    will says:

    whilst the BBC and ex eurocrats line up on the bbc to critsize cameron, most voters think he has done the right thing. If the euro does go done the toilet ( i hope it does not) then who wants to be holding worthless euros or trying to change the currency into national currencies. Would you really want to change your euros into drachma or lira really. The markets see a bad deal as the southern euro states will not reform. The merde will hit the fan when the EU tells france how to run its economy, as it eventually will !!

  73. 73
    Marmite says:

    Anonymong, I asked you before, but you never answered, so I’ll try again……….. are you a foreigner? Possibly P.a.k.i.? Presumably you and your nine dozens relations living off state handouts? Vote Leiber in gratitude? Thought so.

  74. 74
    Special Ed says:

    Tesco and the Pope? Are these separate issues or are they related?

  75. 75
    Lou Scannon says:

    As long as I get to ignite the charges.

  76. 76
    Use a Pun, Go to Gaol! says:

    So which will be remembered more historically– the piss he DIDN’T take, or the piss he DID take?

    *pa DOOM poom!*

    (Note: It isn’t healthy to restrain yourself that way; in old age you may become incontinent. “LCBT 83 1/4″ may wish to elaborate.)

  77. 77
    The Paragnostic says:

    After the good news, a “you couldn’t make it up” story: Tracey Emin appointed as RA Professor of Drawing. Next – Ed Balls appointed as Professor of Economics?

  78. 78
    Gaylord says:

    I work at Heathrow, in an office a few doors down from Unite’s (quite large) local offices. Vast numbers residents work at Heathrow and are Unite members… Labour will win despite putting forward no credible alternative policies since the election – makes no sense to me…

  79. 79
    Special Ed says:

    In denial, rude and a loser. Sums up most of the BBC.

  80. 80
    Anon E Mouse says:

    Don’t think so. ‘Labour Story = EM’ is still technically correct although not for the original reasons.

  81. 81
    What a plonker. says:

    It gets better and better.

  82. 82
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Looks like Jacqui Smith has found a new job
    With Ann Summers

  83. 83
    annette curton says:

    Hell might freeze over.

  84. 84
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    And Gordon Brown Professor of Crayoning

  85. 85
    Special Ed says:

    Fap fap fap…

  86. 86
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    I am laughing, dear, which has caused a slight leakage. I have very little say in these matters nowadays. If I venture out I wear plenty of absorbent layers, mainly from Primark.

  87. 87
    annette curton says:

    “Her drawings are notable for their sketchy simplicity”, LOL.

  88. 88
    Bulldog Drummond says:

    Between the double glazing where there is no oxygen.

  89. 89

    That was the second shot just to be sure.

    Then a third shot to make sure he don’t come back again.

    And a fourth shot just cause I love hearing the sound…

  90. 90
    Blaster Bates says:

    Boring as fuck, mam. Begging your pardon.

  91. 91
    Bulldog Drummond says:

    Photoshop is a great invention.

  92. 92
    The Oncoming Storm says:

    Ed’s dead Baby, Ed’s dead.

  93. 93
    MrAngry61 says:

    Enoch Powell’s best (remembered) speeches were delivered with a full bladder, apparently…

  94. 94
    annette curton says:

    Nice try, but hubby still carries on watching MILF Goddesses 2.

  95. 95
    Anonymous says:

    Unbelievable! What a cretin.

  96. 96
    rocknrolla says:

    Guido is right – shocking performance by Miliband and clearly lacks a decent PR team, most of all though he just acts/sounds/looks like a loser.

    If Labour retain him as leader and if CastIron can get across to the public that retardEd Miliband and Clegg both want our budget being set by unelected Europeans then you can expect a pretty large majority victory for the Conservatives at the next election.

  97. 97
    Special Ed says:

    Now I’ve lost concentration…

  98. 98
    Loungelizard says:

    Militwits policies are known for their sketchy simplicity.

  99. 99
    Special Ed says:

    Brain dead…

  100. 100
    Greychatter says:

    Thought the Grid was the thing that covers the sewer!!

  101. 101
    Googootz says:

    Where’s the commenter Tony Soprano? I’d like him to sort out Ed Balls.

  102. 102

    No, Frankie!

    I’ve tried but nothing’s coming out.

  103. 103
    Anonymous says:

    Gaylord says:
    December 14, 2011 at 2:22 pm

    You seems to think current lots policy is credible!

    1) debt is going up much more than planned.
    2) unemployment is going up
    3) people coming into this country is going up
    4) crime going up

    If current lots policy is credible we would be in a better situation than May 2010 but we are in a worse situation.

  104. 104
    Four-eyed English Genius says:

    Well, he certainly pissed on Red Ed!

  105. 105
    Gordon Brown says:

    I wish Ed Miliband well.

  106. 106
    Cell time says:

    A prison sentence is required at the very least, and then have her thrown out of politics for good.

  107. 107
    Nemo says:

    I think young Billy is a groveller!

  108. 108
    CHRIST ON A BIKE! says:

    It’s a very safe Labour seat, stuffed with Postal voting types and history shows that the main opposition party, just about never lose by-elections, in seats that they hold, don’t know when the last time that happened, but almost never.

  109. 109
    Gaylord says:

    Where in my post does it say I think the current lot are credible?!

    My point is Labour will win, no matter how good or bad they are, because this Labour/Unite territory. Credibility of either side doesn’t seem to be an issue for the voters here, or sadly most other places.

  110. 110
    I Hate Tesco AND the Pope says:

    Hello, Ed. No, they’re not related. I hate Tesco because it’s a criminal organisation that breaks planning laws, as happened recently in Harrogate. They treat suppliers and staff like shit. I know this from working for a market research organisation. Tesco destroys small, local shops and traders, as do some other big retailers. Tesco is by far the worst. Their produce is often second-rate, largely because of their cheese-paring (arf!) deals with suppliers. Many of the suppliers go out of business as a result. One told me he had to pay Tesco for in-store advertising out of his own pocket, just before he was dumped in favour of another small company. Tesco is in a strong, though slightly fading position, because of the preponderance of chavs in their customer base. If you read the excellent book Tescopoly you will never shop there again. We don’t need them and I boycott them totally and encourage others to do so. Please join us.

    As for the fuckers in the Vatican, I have first-hand experience of the church’s child-molestation shenanigans. Two handicapped sons of one of my friends were interfered with regularly in a Catholic special school in the ’70s and now, in their ’40s, have only just summoned up the courage to tell their parents what happened. I’m happy to say their father is currently taking legal advice. The way successive popes have attempted to side-step the day of reckoning by moving around suspect priests from parish to parish is nothing less than criminal. I could tell you in detail about the priest I met in Mexico who has been excommunicated for telling the single mums in his dirt-poor parish to use contraception, but I’ll be brief. He told me, close to tears, that he has no ground left in which to bury still-born and abandoned children.

  111. 111
    Hi sailors! says:

    Did he used to sniff it from a paper bag like the kid next door does on the back stairs?

  112. 112
    Hi sailors! says:

    Or indeed their simple sketchiness.

  113. 113
    Special Ed says:

    Thanks for the reply. Makes sense. I actually share your views – just couldn’t figure out how to lump the two together. ;-) Cheers…

  114. 114
    Dr Fuckwit says:

    I will ask Nurse Botha to give you a nice sulphuric acid enema. You are obviously full of shit today.

  115. 115
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    Just remember….Balls was Brown’s “advisor” at the Treasury!!

    Broon has a degree in History…highly qualified in Finance (NOT)
    Balls has an economics background but clearly doesn’t understand it – ’twas he that advised Broon and between them they fucked up the economy!!

    Nuff said…Simples!!!!

  116. 116
    I Hate Tesco AND the Pope says:

    Actually, Ed, your welcome question has made me realise Tesco and the Vatican (as opposed to whichever Pope is wearing the ridiculous robes) ARE related. Both are criminal organisations. I may have linked them subconsciously. Perhaps I should change my moniker to I Hate Tesco AND The Vatican! I’m pleased you have sympathy with my opinions.

  117. 117
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    Not you thats for sure. Thick Twat!!

  118. 118
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    And Ed Balls

  119. 119
    feed Fred says:

    Ed. Donkey jacket leader of his party

  120. 120
    John Bull. says:

    You’ve been 83 and a quarter for months now.
    Are you the undead or just dead but pickled and preserved in Gin?

  121. 121
    John Bull. says:

    ..a brown-noser, actually.

  122. 122
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    One’s just a table cloth from the painting table at the nursery !

  123. 123
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Empty vessels ! Oh sorry that’s the labour party !

  124. 124
    A Vatican Spokesman says:

    His Holiness has asked me to say that we are not a priest ridden, guilt obsessed, mumbo-jumbo mumbling, relic worshipping, child molesting, indulgence selling criminal organisation and He should know as He is infallible.
    So there.

  125. 125
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Fine performance from the BBC on Daily Politics. Having admitted that most emails were of the opinion that Ed was piss-poor at PMQ’s, that pouting minx Jo Coburn then proceeded to read out only ones that thought Ed did well. The bias was so blatant it was laughable.

  126. 126
    Arch Stanton says:

    I hate Tescos AND the Pope is spot on with his comments about Tesco.

    We are a medium size supplier and supplied Tesco for a short while

    We supply several of the Big Chains and are always reared with honesty and respect

    Tescos are a bunch of arseholes who do treat Suppliers with contempt and disshonesty, they are driven by price and price only, quality and value for money is of NO interest to them

    We incidentally to there shock informed THEM we wished to be removed from there Supplier list and have since returned to a healthy profit and much less stress

    We should all boycott that most wretched of Companies.

    As for Milltwit and Balls ? they are finished. Balls surely has to be a Tory Mole whose brief is to ensure that what little credibilty they (labour) have is destroyed

    Damn fine job he is making of it as well

  127. 127
    Really? says:

    The only way to have fun with the result of this safe Labour seat is to look at it as a fight for third place between UIKIP’s Andrew Charalambous and the Lib Dems.

  128. 128
    spreadforOil says:

    I can’t go for a walk in Clissold Park in case I see him and lose control of my normally good temper. He is so smug I want to piss over him.

  129. 129
    spreadforOil says:

    As in the old one about putting up a donkey and it would get elected, they’ve done that in North Hackney since 1983.

  130. 130
    Greychatter says:

    Often wonder – with Tesco and the other big stores, who announce big job creations with new stores, presumably mostly for part time staff. Do these employees claim Tax credits?

    To what extent are the Tax Payers subsidizing the Super Markets Profits?

  131. 131
    Ed and his Special Needs Party says:

    Leave me alone. I want to crawl up Merkozy’s bottoms.

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