November 23rd, 2011

Another Dodgy Defence Lobbyist With a Tory Business Card

In July 2010 Guido brought Trey Barnes to your attention. He was the defence lobbyist, of no less than six different aliases, who having been chased out of Washington was milling around Parliament with a pass sponsored by Michael Fabricant. He was close to the Atlantic Bridge crowd and used to run the Conservative Friends of America, despite being a Democrat. Well it seems Trey, or George F. Barnes III as he used to go by, is up to his old tricks again…

Guido has come across Mr Barnes’ business card for an organisation called the Conservative Arab Network. It’s run out of house in Ealing and has a bank account with Lloyds in Hammersmith. Despite the card saying Barnes is the Director, there is no sign of the organisation on Companies House. Crucially the card proudly carries the Tory tree logo.

The Conservative Party rules about logo use are pretty clear:

“The party logos are registered trademarks, they are provided for free use by approved Conservative Associations and Candidates only. For commercial or other use you will require written permission from the party. Permission to use the logo is at the sole discretion of the Conservative and Unionist Party.”

Guido simply asked Barnes whether he had sought permission. He replied:

“I do not have the Tory logo or any other party logo on a business card so am a bit confused.”

So Guido sent him this:

Whoops. Mr Barnes replied:

“That is not a business card – I am a volunteer with Conservative Arab Network – there is no compensation, not even expenses – this is part of my voluntary work as a private individual – Conservative Arab Network is an officially recognized organisation affiliated with the Conservative Party”

Or is it? An official statement given earlier said:

“The Conservative Arab Network is not officially recognised by the Conservative Party. In October 2011 the Conservative Arab Network  were sent a letter outlining the procedures they would need to follow to become affiliated to the Party. They have until the 30th of November to submit details.”

Sources indicate that without that official approval, the organisation should not be using the logo or party branding and that the proper due diligence tests have not yet been conducted on the organisation or its director. So here we have yet another lobbyist embedded deep in the  murky world of defence and security lobbying giving out cards that would suggest some official connection to the party of government. Once is careless. Twice looks like “the next big political scandal…”

UPDATE: Michael Fabricant comments:

Just for the record, since my name is mentioned, Trey Barnes never had a House of Commons pass from me in Government and when he had it in Opposition, he signed an agreement never to use the pass it for lobbying purposes.


210 Comments

  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    didnt Dave say after expenses that lobbying would be the next big scandal?

    So what did he do? encourage it?

  2. 5
    minutiae-watcher spotter says:

    Jesus wept.

  3. 6
    Nice one Guido says:

    Not normally a huge fan of Guido but this is like proper, old-fashioned journalism rather than gossip and bitching. Well done. The people trying to cling on this government’s coat tails are some horrible feckers…

    • 25
      Grumpy Old Man says:

      As a dog has fleas, so every Government is infested by rent-seekers. The Parliamentary Wing of the TUC are different only in that the members are the rent-seekers.

  4. 7
    Anonymous says:

    Hmmm you’re stretching this one a bit I think Guido. As far as I can see the only thing he’s guilty of is not realising that the Conservative Arab Network is not (yet) affiliated to the Tory party.

    • 31
      Mustapha Crap says:

      I think you will find that it will never be affiliated now.

    • 74
      fucky nell says:

      He’s also guilty of having a name like Trey – what a nonce

      • 150
        Our Denry says:

        If he is a Yank it would explain the name

        • 193
          fucky nell says:

          good point – he should change it to Gove

        • 200
          DCI Brian Lane, ret. says:

          “Trey”= from the game of poker, where a “trey” is a three, hence Americans colloquially call Fred Bloggs III “Trey” Bloggs, if they used the expression “Fred Bloggs,” which they don’t. As long as I’m at it, “Chip” for “chip off the old block,” i.e. a Jnr, “Skip” for someone named after his grandfather.

          God, I’m such an annoying anorak I annoy myself.

  5. 10
    Selohesra says:

    6 different aliases – I’m sure there is a thoroughly reasonable explanation

  6. 12
    Tessa Tickles says:

    There are certainly some sordid hangers-on, trying the make a fast buck on the back of the Conservative brand.

    Take David Cameron, for instance..

  7. 14
    Ed Balls makes me cry says:

    Next thing will be Miliband with a card affiliating him to the Conservative Party and claiming to be Florence of Arabia

  8. 18
    Ab Fawkes says:

    Keep digging Guido you are on to something here

    How close is/was he to Dr fox and Werrity of whom we have heard little lately

  9. 19
    prentiz says:

    So if I download the Tory Tree, stick it on a business card and claim to be affiliated with the Conservative Party, that’s a Werrity level scandal? Come off it.

    • 61
      ffs! says:

      If I was in charge of the “Tory tree” I would make sure it was not being abused by all and sundry for a quick fucking buck.

      But, there again, I would be a Tory so would turn a blind eye, for a quick buck.

    • 168
      Anonymous says:

      It depends, If you are a liar, a traitor, a scumbag and a complete and utter wanker, it’s probably OK.

  10. 21
    annette curton says:

    If he handed out cards saying he was affiliated to McDonald’s and KFC with their logos on, his feet wouldn’t touch.

  11. 27
    Modern art.... says:
  12. 28
    David Amess says:

    I taught him everything he knows!

  13. 34
    Sun T.A.N. says:

    But wouldn’t a date tree be more apt for the Tory Arab Network?

  14. 35
    Not surprised says:

    Not surprised!

    All around the world, in every walk of life, there are people who will find loopholes in any system which will benefit them financially!

    I just haven’t found one yet.

    Register of lobbyists? Don’t hold your breath!

  15. 36
    Ed Balls makes me cry says:

    I find it deeply disturbing that he is wearing the same jacket as Fox and Werrity. Is it some sort of cry for help or something more sinister?

  16. 39
    Radioactive Imbecile says:

    Most of my constituents are having babies with 2 heads, can they have two postal votes?

    Goodbye.

  17. 40
    Yellow Bird says:

    Has Carina Trimingham got the LibDem logo on her card?

  18. 46
    Engineer says:

    So the guy does political voluntary work on behalf of Arabs and Conservatives. Very public spirited, I’m sure.

    How does he make his living, then?

  19. 52
    I Could Post As "Billy Bowden" But I Won't says:

    Six different “aliases”– no different to many of the posters here!

    • 55
      Hefferlite. I could post as "Ewanme's talking Shih Tzu" says:

      Great post, “I Could Post As “Billy Bowden” But I Won’t ” x

    • 108
      All Hail the Multiverse! says:

      I only ever post as the Paragnostic, except when I’m Thomas O’Pikey, The Priapic Cartesian or another silly name.

  20. 53
    Lord Justice Pickles says:

    Credit to Guido for finding more idiots who have a massive brainfart every time Guido asks them simple, yet devastating, questions.

    “That’s not a business card, I’m a volunteer.”

    FFS. It is a business card with the word Director on it !!!!

    This world is full of human arse-holes – only good for expelling shit.

    • 87
      Our Denry says:

      Billy has not suggested getting out piano wire yet but may humbly I suggest mi Lord Madame Guillotine gives a very, very close shave.

  21. 54
    Polythesis says:

    The MOD, so corrupt and corrupted by special interests, carpet bagger capitalists, old boys networks. A place of brown envelopes, backhanders, kick backs. A money tree for those in the know and those with the right contacts.Want to know why our forces are so woefully equipped and why so much money goes in one end and so little comes out the other? Want to know how come so many senior officers and MOD mandarins somehow land lucrative defence industry jobs so easily when they leave? Why so many so called advisors on the payroll? Its easy to call a friend or member of the family an advisor, they come in do nothing and take the pay check, nobody knows what they do or why, there is no paper trail and they come and go so fast nobody can keep track of them. The Mafia working the New York docks had the same scam going.

    Want to know why the MOD has been set up so nobody is in charge and nobody takes any responsibility and why investigators come out of the MOD dizzy? Thats the way its set up to be, so complicated and convoluted it would make the Byzantine court look simple, its very easy to siphon gigantic amounts of money from such an organisation. As nobody knows where and to whom the money is going or often even why and those that do leave no paper trail and are not going to be talking corruption thrives in dark corners and the MOD is full of dark corners.

    The MOD is a cash cow, it has been for decades and like foreign aid it attracts the scum of the earth, the vultures who come in ever greater numbers to feed, the fact that it leaves our nation without the tools it needs to defend itself, the kit that our troops need to do their jobs and that taxpayers pay the costs leaves the spivs and crooks cold. Its not surprising in the least that this scum has got rich for so long off the backs of the taxpayer.

    • 63
      Ah! Monika says:

      If you have evidence send Guido an email

    • 88
      Our Denry says:

      Well if you go back a few years it came to light that there was a whole warehouse containing, wait for it, horse shoes from the first world war! Of course they would have been high spec. as well hence many times ordinary run of the mill horse shoes, a bit like electronic components

    • 111
      The Paragnostic says:

      Best ask Gerald “Action Man” Howarth where the money goes – the honourable (or is it right honourable now he’s got his foot in the door) member for BAE and Aldershot is very, very well connected with those who benefit most from the MoD’s largesse.

  22. 56

    Perhaps he just likes trees.

  23. 58
    Widescreen2010 says:

    I have just learned from the BBC website that I pay approx £27,000 PA more in taxes than I receive in benefit from being a UK taxpayer.
    I’m feeling a bit of a mug.

  24. 60
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:
    • 65
      see below says:

      Fuck off spammer, get your own fucking blog. If I was interested in reading fucking tweets from wankers I’d subscribe. As it is I don’t, so I haven’t.

      Keep your fucking tweets to yourself you fucking twat.

      Fuck off!

      • 71
        Anonymous says:

        Yes, do fuck off Billy. You are such a huhne. Take a refund if you have to, but just go.

        • 83
          Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

          You the new owners then?

          Hope someone told Guido…..

          • Our Denry says:

            Leave Billy alone, he is Guido’s correspondent from the Pink News

          • Anonymous says:

            You will recall that a couple of months ago Guido told you that it was quality and not quantity that was important. Time for you to take his advice and start playing by his rules – you huhne.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @anon

            You have a very unhealthy obsession with me, seek help.

          • Acidhouse for ever says:

            Billy you sad twat – it was not so long ago that you were criticising others who posted other peoples comments on here without comment. Since then you have frequently stolen comments from other blogs, and taken to posting yours and others tweets without any comment. You are a lying thief, and a huhne.

          • Anonymous says:

            Typical of you Bowden – ignore the truth and trot out some line you stole from somewhere else.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @acid

            Not true, i moaned about then sticking them on unrelated threads and sub threads.

            Let the comment stand alone and let it be judged dont just stick it onto to the nearest at the top.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @anon

            are you aware of every exchange between me and Guido?

          • HT.IU says:

            leave Billy alone – he may be a complete huhne and a fuckwit, but he is our complete huhne and fuckwit – if he does fuck off with a full refund, who will be our huhne and fuckwit.

          • Acidhouse for ever says:

            Your post of the tweet has not relation to this thread. Fuck you are a huhne. Don’t try to justify yourself – just accept you are a huhne. Some people seem to like (that is lick to you I think) you but no doubt you keep the advertising revenue lower than it might otherwise be. Guido did tell you that you should try to concentrate on quality and not quantity.

          • Anonymous says:

            No, I have better things to do – but I do recall that one

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @Acid

            It stood alone, not pinned onto one at the top, you choose to respond, you could of just ignored.
            Oh and PMQS was today.
            @anon

            As you dont know all the facts i would suggest you leave the subject alone.

          • Acidhouse for ever says:

            It does not matter whether it stands alone or is a sub-comment. It has nothing to do with the thread and you posted it without any comment. Counldn’t you think of anything to say? If you were stealing her comment, why not steal something to say about it. You are still a Huhne and that is the end of that. You should be defending my right to call you a Huhne rather than trying to deny the undeniable.

          • Anonymous says:

            Ha, ha – I win

          • Anonymous says:

            the fact is that Guido told you to comment less and to try to improve the quality of your comments – do you need the link?

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @acid

            It was Retweeted to me with out any comment, i have not complained about you calling me a Hunt have i? I have answered your points.

          • Anonymous says:

            Keep tearing him a new one Acid

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @anon see previous reply, you are not aware of facts.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @anon

            How in whatever reallity you live in is that tearing a new one?

          • Billy Bowden in the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            it would be good if some regulars would help out here

          • The Paragnostic says:

            Will you three just fuck off and get married or whatever?

          • Anonymous says:

            ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

          • Tim Henman says:

            Don’t tear Billy too many new arseholes, guys. I’m programmed to blast into one of two service boxes.

          • Anonymous says:

            I say, The Paragnostic is very rude for a newbie on this blog

          • Ewanme says:

            lol

            *Tweaks flaps an grabs popcorn*

          • Anonymous says:

            so you no longer deny that Guido told you to move from quantity to quality – I win

          • Billy Bowden in the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @Tim
            where have i had a new one torn – what world do you live in

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            I do, because it was a sockpuppet and he knew it.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @anon, actully he refused to check.

            Only readers should hold bloggers/media to account.

          • Anonymous says:

            Billy, Billy, Billy – you have never denied it was you before. In any event Guido’s comment was aimed at you generally and not at any particular comment you made. Own up and apologise.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            @anon

            I didnt deny everytime you accused me of being from another country like you did earlier, and when you was offered a reasoned argument on the post you run away.

          • Anonymous says:

            See comment 157 below – ha ha etc

          • Ewanme says:

            LOL !!

            You guys is funny .

            Not quite funny peculiar but you’s gettin there , I spose .

            E x .

          • Anonymous says:

            It is not me that accused you of coming from another country – must have been another anon. I am the original Billy fake. I use Anon when I try, and usually succeed, in tearing you a new one.

          • Acidhouse for ever says:

            You have not answered my points, and not even you can complain about me calling you a Huhne. Why do you post other peoples tweets, and why do you steal comments from other blogs?

          • Acidhouse for ever says:

            Billy – looks like you might have run away again

          • Anonymous says:

            ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

            run back to your mama Billy

    • 190
      A Bunch of Chumps says:

      We are a bunch of chumps.

      • 204
        Our Denry says:

        This blog seems to be reverting to one of the old newsgroups I used to be on, Willy is just posting for the sake of posting so folks are starting to flame the little tinker. If you don’t like Willy posting so much, don’t make a a followup comment it just gets the little fellow all excited

  25. 62
    Ford Cortina Effingham says:

    Might just send them my cv. I know a few big knobs in Westminster.

  26. 64
    albacore says:

    Erm, you reckon the Tory (hah!) Party (spit!) has some worthwhile reputation left to lose, then, eh, do you, Fawkes, eh?

    • 67
      Damien McBride says:

      Vote Labour! Only we have the decent values that Britain needs!

    • 69
      Call me Dave - windy miller, eco loon, trougher and europhile says:

      Cash for access, roll up, roll up, the Cons are the new wankers in town! Fox’s ‘best man’ and SpAdtastic Billy vague are only for starters.

      We’ve taken up the mantle from the previous bunch of utter c’unts.

      Get used to it, bitches!

      ps. My m8 Merkel agrees!

      • 94

        Nothing wrong with a bit of lobbying.
        I am quite innocently meeting with Sonnerstein-Berghoff & Glaswazcyzcha
        They are keen to sell something to the UK. Coal, I think. Possibly electronics,or maybe it was salmon? Anyway, i said I’d help them meet the right people . Just to get them a foot in the door.

        I want absolubtely nothing in return except the satisfaction that comes from helping the community, a seat on the board 3 months after my retirement from politics and a cheque for £8,000 to be getting along with.
        Now what’s the problem?

    • 97
      Our Denry says:

      That’s why Liebore lost the GE and if the Cons are seen to be doing the same thing they will not win the next GE, voters do have long memories and Liebore is bouncing along the bottom

  27. 66
    Jess The Dog says:

    Political parties are utterly corrupt. There is not a single political party in the UK that has not tried to protect or cover-up the wrongdoings of a member. At worst, this is institutionalized corruption at the heart of Westminster: cash for peerages; benefits to unions and businesses who donate to parties; ministers clinging to office for breathtaking sleaze that would result in instant dismissal elswewhere; a nod-and-wink approach to expenses resulting in criminal charges and imprisonment.

    Why should taxpayers fund parties? Why should vested interest groups and individuals be allowed to fund parties for their own benefit?

    Restrict parties to capped individual membership subscriptions. If MPs want guidance on matters of policy, they could always consult their constituents, rather than treating them with contempt.

    http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/21338

  28. 73

    Just for the record, since my name is mentioned, Trey Barnes never had a House of Commons pass from me in Government and when he had it in Opposition, he signed an agreement never to use the pass it for lobbying purposes.

    • 78
      fucky nell says:

      get her

    • 79
      annette curton says:

      But did anybody bother to check the wording of this alleged agreement signed
      Yours sincerely,
      H.P. Sauce.

      • 102

        If you’re using the HP sauce logo on your business card you could be a member of the discredited Smith foundation.

        They used the ‘Brown’ sauce logo as code for Gordon.

        Strangely it wasn’t the ‘Brown’ connection that gave them the idea. It was that a blob of Brown Sauce on a napkin looks like a shit stain. Perfect metaphor for the great clunking helmsman and his secret society of him and Tom and Ed.

        • 163
          annette curton says:

          It also has a design of the Houses of Parliament on the bottle, hence the HP bit, Brownian motion… ugh!, Lea & Perrins for me from now on.

        • 198
          Talking of which says:

          Just out of interest , have the MOD managed to clean Gordon Brown off that Beach yet ?

      • 110
        Our Denry says:

        Michael old chap we have Fox (I just happened to be in the same hotel the same time as Mr Werrity) and Werrity (I just happened to be in same the hotel the same time as Dr Fox) found out so the doubt factor is running very high so anything that seems a bit dodgy is jumped on.

        • 174
          annette curton says:

          I care not whether they call themselves Fox, Werrity or Fabrication they are all weasels and its high time Ratty, Mole and Badger set about them with cudgels, cracked some heads and evicted them from Toad Hall.

    • 80

      Sq an GoSub , darlin x !!

      SC x .

    • 210
      Anonymous says:

      In addition to Micaels comments, and as Becatech have been mentioned in passing, I feel that I should add my two penneth worth.

      Global Policy Group was contracted to Becatech in 2006/7 to assist in the development of a specific business opportunity in the United States of America. This work was completed in 2009 to our complete satisfaction.

      However, to be absolutely clear, there is no longer any relationship between the Company and Mr Barnes nor Global Policy Group. They are not currently under contract to us and do not represent us in any forum at all. Additonally I would like to state, for the record, that neither Mr Barnes, nor Global Policy Group have ever worked for Becatech in any capacity that involves te UK or the UK Government.

  29. 77
    50 Calibre says:

    This lobbying shit could be stopped dead in its tracks if Dave had a mind to do it. Clearly he doesn’t think it merits an instruction to one of his civil servants to get it stopped.

    Something else to be remembered come the next election…

    • 113
      Our Denry says:

      Yes agreed, but Dave may not be PM next time round so if he goes to the back benches or a minister, he has to leave his options open.

  30. 81
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Guardian apologise to the Sun: http://bit.ly/uDCTpt

  31. 86
    not a machine says:

    The MOD is clearly not as full of experinced contientious people with loud voices and brasso on hand as it used to be , or is there a battallion developed under Labour that only fights for finance sector in an all too mercenary fashion , while the real army gets laid off ?.

    Didnt really see PMqs although one comment should have come back to ed a little better .
    Dont know what to make of Huhnes statement , i thought CCP had been well and truly rubbished , it seems not , hes found a gas power station to try it , which will be fun as its wonk on paper let alone a full scale build and george backs it .
    yesterdays health questions had another diffciult time for Andy , but not so much as the question on “what efforst had been made on PFI” by a labour mp , amid the almost unstopable “mirth” from the govt benches , the biggest turkey in the world thumped on labours policy somewhere . health questions are becomming almost as dangerous as deputy pmqs (that is a bowl of poison)

    The media had a rather astonishing reaction todays care report , for the cries of what had been happening had been avaiable to listening ears for some time , on what had been happening under labour . I could almost imagine the media (shouts from editors office) “jenkins what do you know failing home care service , find somthing , preferbaly really weird ones and then talk about it or your fired ”
    One or two more interesting opinions got through , but very few seemed to even comprehand what this quiet service interaction actually does , yes it is shocking what can and does go off , but then you might wonder where the thoruogh and competant journos had gone , as to suddenly seem so surprised . The experienced voices of the like of Joan Bakewell and Esther Rantzthen who were the sort of people who held no fear on looking at and examining a difficult or delicate service for the benefit of the public has long since passed .

    Indeed it was some of the horrors that i saw under labour that got me into politics , when you kiss someone goodnight with a bruise one night , find them in a soiled bed food left uneaten 2 nights later and dead the following day , if that doesnt cause rage i dont know what does .A care merrygo round under labour was an utter horror , where was st tone you may well ask .

    Not one journo had any comprehension of what goes on in caring roles or even imagined what you encounter , what it is like . the tales of 30mins to wash dress and feed someone , or put someone to bed at 4pm , or cook and leave food are perfectly true , as are some cases of petty theft . But then shouldnt be the question of , what is best for vulnerbale people be more in mind . If care cannot be properly done by fliting around the houses then shouldnt either tempory or permanent forms of residence be better , where care is more on hand ?? .
    Also its not just the elderly who use this service , but we have been focused on hospital effiecency and bed freeing for some time , to the point where under labour an almost fear became common , if you were old and ill without any family and got caught in the sytem , so variable was the possibilities across the country .
    In Italy care of elders is as very different , in this country we seem to have developed an almost pro euthanasia stance when confronted with care dilemmas , instead of it being part of life itself . One guest nearly touched it questioning if somthing wasnt erm a bit wrong with now many think , perhaps labour have filled minds so busy and full we no longer care properly in a positive way , merely offended that its absent without knowing why .
    I might point to the loss of christian culture , or the loss of developing or running a compassionate approach to life , as it is cut across being part of the I generation as Rabbi Jonathan sachs pointed out .
    As I have said before a way of living that monitors and programs the self , can only lead to an out come of collective amneasia as to contemplating that which is outside of ones self. If we know that genine care/compassion is uniquely a human function and perhaps interaction with the devine , then steve jobs must be getting a bit of a dressing down in heaven ! I sometimes feel that we have invented our own logical and terrible end , defined as a bag of molicules and water , that can be used by governments or not , the old emotions that had value been prostitutued all too cheaply .

    I mean if you need your meal cooking , washing and dressing , how does half an hour really tackle what may be the rest of your time alone .

    • 121
      Not the time says:

      You could be a copy and paste machine, ever thought about that?

    • 122
      Our Denry says:

      Social workers dictate how long takes, many have not actually done care work themselves come straight from Uni, care workers have to do what is required (or what the client wants) in the time alloted, they do not get paid if they go over time, and in a lot of cases petrol (or travel expenses) is not paid.

      • 152
        not a machine says:

        your right Our Denry , not that I think the social worker is the solution either , but what this report shows has been going on for a long time , unfortuantely doesnt have the ribbon cutting kudos for this age .

  32. 90

    Ed Balls sings along to the antiques roadshow theme.

    “My nan has died
    oh how..I cried..
    I’m so,
    upset
    And a lit-tle..wet..

    She had,
    a turn
    Now she’s left this urn
    Is it worth,
    much cash?
    or only good,
    for her ash?

    I’ll take,
    fifty quid,
    So I can be rid,
    of this li-ttle pot,
    Its not worth,
    a lot,
    But is all she got.

    Its not,
    queen Anne
    as my dear,
    old gran,
    Never had much dosh
    she was, not posh
    She was wor-king class,
    Lots of muck and brass
    And plenty of tat,
    like this old hat
    That’s been picked at
    Its worth exactly that….!!!

    Bugger -all !!

    “Ok Fiona, Say..£40 for the vase then? Cash? No receipt, no VAT? All right ?”

  33. 92
    Huntsford Piddlington says:

    Lock him up, evict his entire family from their homes, and ban him from receiving welfare handouts for life!

  34. 96
    nell says:

    It’s amazing isn’t it what weird and wonderful people you get trying to make a fast buck out of lobbying,

    There’s this odd chap here and fox’s friend and carina trimingham trying to get in on the act and that husband and wife tory couple who had to give up their constituencies because their troughing was so extreme (forget their names).

    It doesn’t seem to be a ‘profession’ taken up by highly qualified, ethically motivated, professional people does it?

    • 105
      not a machine says:

      If that makes upset Nell , you should see what goes off in the EU

    • 130
      The Paragnostic says:

      What else can one do with a third in PPE from Oxford? The lobbyists are of the same ilk as estate agents, double glazing salesmen and pimps. They exist at all levels in society, and are the sort of people you’d have avoided at school in case they tried to sell you your own lunchbox. They are the ticks on the arse of society, but unfortunately ever-present.

      • 139
        Our Denry says:

        Prags, what is that, a BA failed

        • 205
          Really? says:

          Politics, Philosophy and Economics; the choice of people who’ve known since puberty that the peak of their (usually considerable) ambition is to lead their party and their country.

          The truly gifted, such as Boris, take a proper undergraduate degree in an unrelated subject and treat politics as an amusing bloodsport to be engaged in when not studying.

    • 136
      Our Denry says:

      That is why they are politicians and always has been if you go back in history, they have power (ok some have more than others) and power corrupts etc, power has the ability to to provide largess and beneficiaries to people and in turn they expect when they leave power things will be be reciprocated (for some it not quite work out as planned, others benefitted hugely

  35. 99
    Ah! Monika says:

    Tabloids are probably terrified to comment but…Mrs McCann looks like she is putting on weight round her tummy area.

    • 114
      GOD says:

      DON’T look at me like that. I’ve done enough immaculate impregnations to last me a lifetime.

      • 133
        Is Tim Henman the most underemployed BBC freeloader ever? says:

        I find that comment offensive. Well done.

    • 134
      The Paragnostic says:

      Don’t mention the fucking McCanns – I’ve had to rescue the radio from the other side of the room once already after listening to the whiny Jock and his irritating Scouse bint trying to claim sympathy for abandoning their child.

      In a proper world, Jocks and Scousers would be banned from breeding, let alone being allowed to leave their children alone while dining with their equally fucking hopeless friends.

      • 141
        Ah! Monika says:

        Are you TRYING to get yourself invited to the Inquiry?

        • 176
          The Paragnostic says:

          I’d be no use to the inquiry – I really don’t care what the newspapers do to fill the space between the adverts.

      • 170
        Ed Balls says:

        In another world that mere mortals inhabit, a couple who go out on the piss with their friends leaving their babies alone in a holiday flat night after night would not have had a government PR spokesman provided free of charge to defend such stupid behaviour.

        And now it seems that protection will continue in this government inquisition.

      • 199
        Your Welsh and you know you are says:

        Welshmen and sheep should be banned from Breeding.

  36. 120
    Duncan says:

    I see the Conservative Arab Network website have dropped the tree.

    Perhaps they’ve heard from CCO since the 17/11…

    http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:Qvx2RFx608gJ:www.conservativearabnetwork.com/+consrevatice+arab+network&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=uk&client=firefox-a

  37. 132
    Anonymous says:

    Billy is getting a new one torn at comment 60 above. Where are the guys at comment 9 above to protect him.

  38. 135
    Ninian Reid says:

    Looks rather foxy (lower case) to me…

  39. 144
    Kered Ybretsae says:

    About time the lobby lobby got cleaned out. Conservative Handbag Carriers Network, may well be next.

  40. 154
    Ed Balls says:

    I balled my eyes out when Arthur Negus died.

  41. 159
    No leg to stand on says:

    I want Ewanme.

    And SC (He a cool Cat!)

    BBITBU rocks too (;less the kak spelling)

    I’m looking forward to some of us kicking off against the chains of oppression.

    ( I may be dangerously overloaded on flu tabs, steroids and anti biotics) but hot damn the rush with the red vino is ALL good!!!

    • 164
      Ewanme says:

      *Squeaks*

      Pardon me , babes :(

      Yeah !! Let’s DO it !!!

      E x .

      • 184
        No leg to stand on says:

        nah E, you is prolly best a dish served from afar. I’ll let the Cat lead te way. TBH this is all just a bit too shit for my liking, when do we get to go out and knock over a few pols, i grow tired of the shit and misery they heap on us. Its time they re learnt how thet serve us and not us that serve then.

  42. 186
    Billy Bowden is the greatest fluffer ever ! says:

    New thread! :)

  43. 191
    david says:

    Pass sponsored by Mickey Fab, well nothing suspicious there!

  44. 207
    Mr O B Wan-Kenobi says:

    ‘This is not a business card’

    ‘This is not a coalition government, nothing to see here, move along, move along’

  45. 209
    Anonymous says:

    He looks like that magician The Great Soprendo.

    Shouldn’t the logo of the Conservation Arab Network (Portillo in Marrakesh?) be a date palm?



Balls Calls for Deeper Cuts | Speccie
Lessons from the Thirties | CPS
PMQs Idiots | Harry Cole
Jon Cruddas is Not the Messier | Dan Hodges
We Should Honour Victims | Bob Blackman
Bad Al Campbell Spinning for Portland | PR Week
HuffPo’s House Jihadi | Washington Free Beacon
Osborne Gets His Soundbite | Nick Robinson
Moonbat versus Chomsky | Charles Crawford
Beecroft is “S**t” | LibDem MP
News of the World Trailed Watson’s Mistaken Mistress | Indy
Shabana Mahmood MP Saves Brum Market | ITV News
Plan a Velvet Divorce for the €uro | Gideon Rachman
Truth About Romney’s Bain “Vampire Capitalism” | Wall Street Journal
Clegg’s Revenge | Nick Wood
Cleaning Out Stables | Biased BBC

Previously Seen


Peter Botting



Iran’s military chief-of-staff, Major General Hassan Firouzabadi…

“The Iranian nation is standing for its cause and that is the full annihilation of Israel”.



The last Quango in Paris says:

Mr Bryant and Mr Watson managing to make the whole hacking affair look like a farce – the more they moan the less I care about the whole subject! So partisan it beggars belief at all costs. They cannot rise above it ! If I was to call the PM a ‘liar’ I would want to be VERY sure.



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