November 22nd, 2011

Up Close and Personnel

Which mid-market tabloid editor recently sat down with his whispering broadsheet rival and made it clear that unless the latter’s attacks on his paper were toned down, the broadsheet editor would soon be seeing the fact that he keeps his mistress on his staff in the pages of the said tabloid?

The circular firing squad is getting personal…


  1. 1
    Fake Bowden says:

    Grab the popcorn :-)


  2. 2
    Shire Tory says:



  3. 3
    Tahrir Square says:

    I couldn’t give a Thomas Cook. Get a job, you fat c’unt.


    • 31
      Ed Balls says:

      “I cry at Top Gear, you know, when someone does a fast lap and they say ‘it means more than money’. Incredibly emotional”.


    • 144
      Ed Balls says:

      I cry at the Antiques Roadshow. You know the bit where some old lady comes in and says “How much is this family heirloom worth? I’ve got to sell it because those thieving cnuts in the Labour Party raided my pension to throw money at the NHS without fixing its problems in the first place.”


  4. 5
  5. 7
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Isn’t “mid-market tabloid” an oxymoron?


  6. 8
    CHRIST ON A BIKE! says:

    The Graudian a rival to the Mail. They are after very diffrent target markets surely?


  7. 10
    Hedley Lamarr says:

    Don’t know. Are you going to tell us?


  8. 12
    Steve Miliband says:

    Is that Polly keeps her job then?


  9. 16
    screw the lot of them says:

    They’re all utter c’unts.


  10. 19
    Dave's huge bazooka says:

    Isn’t it fantastic that the sub-human morons in Britain, the US, France and Italy allow us to bomb Libya back to the stone age, steal their $200bn+ gold reserves, put an end to the gold-backed African dinar, which threatened Ponzi central banks everywhere, plunder its oil and water acquifer reserves, all under the banner of “humanitarian intervention” and getting rid of a genocidal dictator, but allow us to support the continuation of Saudi Arabia, Bahrain – invaded by Saudi troops – and now the murderous dictatorship of the regime in Egypt, against the mass of the Egyptian people, and there is no call for sanctions, ” humanitarian interventions”, no-fly zones, or in actuality, carpet bombing of civilians, like Libya, all because Egypt, Saudi et al’s regimes kiss Izzy’s c ock!?

    Fucking wonderful this mass media owned by the few thing, no!?


    • 46
      Dud says:

      …. and the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. ‘Twas ever thus.


      • 113
        Please expain your oft quoted platitude says:

        Poorer compared to whom ? Are you saying the “poor” of today have a worse standard of living than the “poor” of 30 years ago, 20 years, 10years ?


    • 133
      Libyan School of Economics Professor says:

      Hey Saif, how are you? How did you get access to the Internet?


  11. 24
    Penfold says:

    Names please, expose them, we need to be told, public interest definitely at heart here, flay the hypocrits.

    Resignations all round, hooray.

    Oh, and yes, tell HMRC, should be some loot innit for them.


  12. 28
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Michael Dugher MP on the Daily Politics. Whay a sly bastard.


  13. 29
    Antipo-dean says:

    Come on, Guido. You publish single-source stories, you told the CMS select committee so only a week ago. Out with it.


  14. 34
    I don't need no doctor says:

    I’ve cracked it. Use vile language and get posted – no moderation. Fucking great! Bollocks!


  15. 36
    I don't need no doctor says:

    It’s amazing how MPs berate high salaried executives yet can’t wait to get a bank job when they leave parliament. Ask labour.


  16. 38
    Anonymous says:

    She may well do as you say, but the DT doesn’t really have a go at the Mail, does it? Much more likely to be the Grauniad?


  17. 41
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Judging by her beer-gut, she spends her lunchtimes in the pub.


  18. 54
    Ewanme says:

    LMAO !!!

    That would explain why she woz always turnin down my offers of some girl-on-girly action , babe .

    She didn’t wanna jeopardise her position , FFS .

    E x .


    • 74
      Anon says:

      Are we/ you discussing Anne W*ddec*mbe on this thread?

      Well I never


      • 83
        Ewanme says:

        Hiya , Anon , honey xx .

        I ain’t saying no more . If Ewa knows who the fuck it is , the whole world must do too .

        Dunno why Guido posted this if he woz sooo shit scared of the unmentionable name bein mentioned , FFS .

        Ewa first got wind in the comments under one of her own stories over 3 years ago .

        Hardly a secret then , is it ???

        As usual E x .


  19. 67
    Tessa Tickles says:

    It was a reasonable deduction.


  20. 70
    Uncle Monty says:

    That’s why she’s called the 3 am girl


  21. 76
    Moussa Koussa says:

    Don’t say anything too rabble-rousing, or even just a little naughty, otherwise Mongo Mensch will have you prosecuted.

    How very Tory…….LOL.

    Careful now Guido, “The Tory Neo Con Internet Police” are on the march !!!!!!


    • 141
      Tom Baldwin's Liebour Ajax supplier says:

      Moussa Kun ter….your student vi sa sponsored by Bliar for LSE has been revoked.

      Interpol have been informerd you thick mong….



  22. 79
    Neo-Guido says:

    This story is not a re-run recent private eye allegations.

    Try harder.


  23. 80
    The Coach and Horses says:

    Always assumed all newspaper editors had their current whore on the staff? What with packing these places with their mates, family and shag buddies it’s no wonder they sell less and less. They just speak to the same people all the time whilst being owned by a bunch of wealthy weirdos. Take notice of them at your peril.


  24. 81
    Engineer says:

    The mistress is ‘on the staff’ of the broadsheet. That does not necessarily mean that the mistress is a journalist.

    Anybody who has ever worked in a large organisation knows full well that senior staff and directors always keep the best totty as P.A.s, secretaries, etc. The best totty has always known how to ‘advance the career’.

    There is an old Naval toast, oft used in the Officers’ Mess, “To our wives and sweethearts; may they never meet.”


  25. 85
    Uncle Monty says:

    Apparently it isn’t Ms Gordon


  26. 93
    What a scoop! says:

    I love that Princess Diana has made a return to the Express front page for the first time in 5 minutes. Today’s story is “Russell Grant says his friend Princess Diana was murdered”.


    • 115
      To be Fair says:

      To be fair Grants prophesy is spot on even down to the fine details , it would have been better though and even more impressive if he had made it known before the event and not 14 years after.


  27. 94
    anon says:

    Newspapers are there to fudge facts and muddy the waters, usually on behalf of circulation interests.Dressed up as truth,the real story is hidden in whats not reported.So is this particular blog worth your effort.It appears to support that Murdoch muck raking is of a better class than the Mirror/Mail/Guardian.


  28. 95
    EdButLookBalls says:

    Did I just hear Gary O’Donohue play a blinder for Liebour saying that they depended on funding from the Unions of 25% of their income!


  29. 96
    Tony Blair says:

    Carole gives me a hand shandy every morning. Cherie cries but a £50 note always cheers her up.


  30. 98
    Gordon Brown says:

    I did not have sexual relations with that woman. Or any woman.


  31. 99
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Jobs for the girl(friend)s.

    Nepotism only kin deep in the MSM.


  32. 100
    anon says:

    Nothing like a bit of press blackmail .Call it a D notice.


  33. 102
    Unhappy as Larry says:


    • 119
      annette curton says:

      I think it is about time you seriously tried to influence policy in No.10, OK, the rat pogrom has been a complete failure on your part but at the next cabinet re-shuffle maybe the job as home secretary or energy and climate minister could be a possibility.


  34. 103
    Ed Balls says:



  35. 111
    Doggie Fashion says:

    Are we talking boradsheet here or, as they call it, midi? To the best of my knowledge there is only one daily broadsheet left or are we including Sundays?


  36. 112
    Border control dickwad says:

    Another Labour bandwagon loses a wheel. Fuck you milliband and all you Labour cnuts

    @glenoglazaSky: Home office PermSec Helen Ghosh has told Home Affiars Cte: May sent email to Brodie Clark EXPLICITLY warning him NOT to exceed instructions

    @glenoglazaSky: HO Perm Sec sticks boot into Brodie Clark: Ministers relied on his detailed weekely reports in which he never mentioned the issue #borders


    • 116
      Tax Payer says:

      “May sent email to Brodie Clark EXPLICITLY warning him NOT to exceed instructions”

      Come on – May would certainly have mentioned this when it all blew up. What’s going on?


  37. 140
    wondering says:

    I’m guessing the Tabloid is the daily mail and the broadsheet is the guardian now I wonder who the mistress is


  38. 146
    Strolling Bones says:

    I just googled the quote from comment #59,and that turned out to be very enlightening – helped by the 12.40 confirmation above


  39. 147
    Strolling Bones says:

    Should be no surprise that there’s a lot of inter-office shagging going on in all walks of life. This helpful article explains some of the reasons why….


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