A Comedy Treat

Guido has a bottle of the finest from the nice people at Glenfiddich to give to last week’s caption contest winner. Nothing really tickled him though, so instead the prize is going to the commenter “Selohesra” who has recently taken up limerick writing. Here’s a selection of some of the cleaner ones:

There once was an MP called Chuka
Whose left wing credentials weren’t Pukka
Privileged and greedy
With tax planning quite seedy
Lets hope he ends up in the gutter

There once was a PM called Thatcher
There are scarcely any could match her
Churchill was one
Before my days begun
So for me its the union dispatcher

A deputy PM called Nick
Came across as a little bit thick
As was plain to be seen
On the €uro he was keen
The tosser, the loser, the pr*ck

An ex PM from Kirkcaldy
Whose grip on reality was shoddy
Claimed his name was not Brown
That he lived in toytown
And henceforth had to be called Noddy

Well Guido laughed, so congratulations…




Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

David Cowling, the BBC’s head of political research, in an internal memo…

“It seems to me that the London bubble has to burst if there is to be any prospect of addressing the issues that have brought us to our current situation. There are many millions of people in the UK who do not enthuse about diversity and do not embrace metropolitan values yet do not consider themselves lesser human beings for all that. Until their values and opinions are acknowledged and respected, rather than ignored and despised, our present discord will persist. Because these discontents run very wide and very deep and the metropolitan political class, confronted by them, seems completely bewildered and at a loss about how to respond (“who are these ghastly people and where do they come from?” doesn’t really hack it). The 2016 EU referendum has witnessed the cashing in of some very bitter bankable grudges but I believe that, throughout this 2016 campaign, Europe has been the shadow not the substance.”

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

Britain Votes For Brexit Britain Votes For Brexit
BBC Declares Brexit Winner BBC Declares Brexit Winner
Guido’s Referendum Best Bits Guido’s Referendum Best Bits
Bob Geldof Boat Passenger Votes Leave Bob Geldof Boat Passenger Votes Leave
Which Brexiteer Are You? Which Brexiteer Are You?
Referendum Day CCHQ Leak Referendum Day CCHQ Leak
Liz Hurley Backs Brexit Liz Hurley Backs Brexit
WHICH REMAINER ARE YOU? WHICH REMAINER ARE YOU?
EU TO OPEN NEW TURKEY MEMBERSHIP TALKS ON JUNE 30 EU TO OPEN NEW TURKEY MEMBERSHIP TALKS ON JUNE 30
GERMAN BUSINESS CHIEF CALLS POSSIBILITY OF POST-BREXIT BARRIERS “VERY, VERY FOOLISH” GERMAN BUSINESS CHIEF CALLS POSSIBILITY OF POST-BREXIT BARRIERS “VERY, VERY FOOLISH”
PROJECT SNEER: LUVVIES SAY LEAVERS ARE ‘THICK IDIOTS’ PROJECT SNEER: LUVVIES SAY LEAVERS ARE ‘THICK IDIOTS’
TURKEY “FLABBERGASTED” BY CAMERON: “HE’S OUR BIGGEST SUPPORTER!” TURKEY “FLABBERGASTED” BY CAMERON: “HE’S OUR BIGGEST SUPPORTER!”
BORIS LOOKS FORWARD TO INDEPENDENCE DAY BORIS LOOKS FORWARD TO INDEPENDENCE DAY
HESELTINE: UK WILL JOIN EURO IF WE REMAIN HESELTINE: UK WILL JOIN EURO IF WE REMAIN
Sadiq “EU Should Not Be a Christian Club” Sadiq “EU Should Not Be a Christian Club”
“REST IN POWER”: CORPORATE SPIN DOCTORS TAKE CONTROL OF COX IMAGE “REST IN POWER”: CORPORATE SPIN DOCTORS TAKE CONTROL OF COX IMAGE
3 TORY CHICKENS YET TO DECLARE 3 TORY CHICKENS YET TO DECLARE
KEN SQUIRMS AS HITLER HISTORIAN DEBUNKED KEN SQUIRMS AS HITLER HISTORIAN DEBUNKED
REMAIN LEAFLET BLAMES LEAVE: “JO COX’S MURDER IS ONLY THE START” REMAIN LEAFLET BLAMES LEAVE: “JO COX’S MURDER IS ONLY THE START”
MOMENTUM CHIEF: MCDONNELL WHO IS SHOWING LEADERSHIP MOMENTUM CHIEF: MCDONNELL WHO IS SHOWING LEADERSHIP