Tom Watson Bills Taxpayer For PR Advisors
The latest tranche of expenses data published this week had £652.08 claimed by Tom Watson for “Professional Services (Staff.)” This is the fourth identical claim made by Watson since April, bringing the total bill to £2,639.40. These payments mirror the rise in Watson’s campaign against News International as well as a shake up in his personal image…
Watson’s local paper the Wolverhampton Express and Star claim that the this money is being paid to Gordon & Badley Communications –a PR company with a track record of providing Labour MPs with consultants. Why are we paying for Tom Watson’s personal aggrandisement?
Hang Him!
Have i really gotta chance with caption contest?
Pie eater and porky pies come to mind…
a shake up in his personal image!!!???
Still looks like a greasy, fat c*nt!
The PR company is evidently not up to the job.
Get our money back Tom.
I don’t know – the PR company does a reasonable job of rolling turds in glitter.
Shut up Tom!
invoice is in the post
What a waste of money – glasses or no glasses, he’s still a fat ugly f*ck!
tom – what awanker
The IMF are looking for money. Then look no further than the Swiss bank accounts of the Political Elite., Some 180 billion Let the IMF take that and stop TAXING THE PEOPLE THE STRANGLE HOLD IS KILLING US.
Billy Bunter before and after a Gordonover.
I thought a hat-tip was some sort of cloakroom ticket, but apparently not.
Nevertheless, Rupert Murdoch might wish to hat-tip Norma Desmond;
“I am big. It’s the politicians that got small”
Before – a fat Graham Taylor
After – a fat Fabio Capello
Still a fat bastard.
This fat slob, with an over inlated sense of his own importance, is nowhere near as funny as Biily Bunter.
They aren’t doing too well are they? That photograph on the right looks like a police mug shot.
The photo on the left looks like a reject from a “Spot The Nonce” competition.
It also looks like he’s been drinking 4 or 5 pints of Sunny Delight a day for a year.
Watson has been on the Prescot diet. You get to eat out in good restaurants on the tax payer. You then throw it all up in the toilet and you still look like Billy Bunter afterwards.
Stand by for a book about what a hard life he’s had.
His mrs left him this year. Perhaps she went to specksavers too?
He’s a troughing socialist hypocrite.
And yes, a fat *.
Looks normal English retard to me.
He certainly does.
Could you find rope strong enough to hold the fat fuck up?
Public sector , No
Private sector, with pleasure.
Why are we funding this character’s obsession with News International? Isn’t this obsession now amounting to misuse of public office. Everyone should have a hobby, but in your own time and at your own expense Watson
This is nothing I had a full time PR who worked for Portsmouth City Council and paid for by the taxpayer, who’s sole job was to keep any detrimental statements about me out of the press, under threat of legal action. Legal fees of course, paid for by my boys in Portsmouth. Boaz.
She must have had to work bloody hard to keep your name out of the press Handycock, with all the rumours circulating around Europe, Westminster and Portsmouth about you for years. Just goes to show, in the end it will all come out and from what I hear, this is just the beginning.
Someone ought to do a survey of the many illegitimate children around, in his council constituency of Fratton, and investigate the paternity, and how many of the illegitimate males look like hobbitts, have beards and have been arrested for sexual molestation.
We are currently doing a survey in Fratton to see how many women have Houses of Parliament Teddy Bears. To date we have discovered over 100.
Billy, you cannot expect to win by stealing other peoples line and posting them as if they were your own. You are a fuckwit at the best of times, and surely it is time you took a full refund, fucked off and died.
Come on Billy, what is wrong with you – so far you have only posted a few times, only one tweet from somebody else and none of your own tweets. Get on with it man – you fans demand more of you. I am not sure why you are stopping people from following you on twitter but you seem to be blocking everybody because virtually nobody is actually following you. I know you love Guido, but there is an army out here that love you.
God he is a fat fucker. No amount of hairspray or lip gloss will make him look any different. At what point when he scoffs does he realise he doesn’t actually need the food he is eating?
Want a cheap laugh ? Prick him and watch him flying round the room making farting noises.
LOL
No.
Is it just me or have our less than esteemed politicians still not realised what the MP’s expenses scandal meant. All politicians are seen (by me ayway) as useless potential fraudsters. I thought someone at Westminseter was supposed to be policing political expenses.
Dear twatson
Can you tell us why Jack Dromey (who??, he who is married to Harriet Harman and managed to grab a seat in a women’s only short list in a city where he does not reside) manages to get paid by unions whilst being a so called MP representing his union cronies?
Let us have some transparency in the expenditure and shady dealing of the unions and the labour party.
Did we also pay for his liposuction? The fat troughing c unt couldn’t have lost his quadruple chin from dieting.
Maybe he’s got AIDS, or cancer.
Nice. What a joy you must be.
Yup, that’s me!
How about AIDS and cancer? Together. Perhaps with MS thrown in for good measure.
Don’t know about aids or cancer but MS is not funny, grow up you Watson!
He not only supports Labour, he is Labour. Surely that is impediment enough?
Troughing is still a cross party activity it seems. They are all as bad as each other.
I dunno, he’s got a bit of a “no pies for a year” sort of face on him.
Could have been a plastic surgeon on youf training scheme.
£2639.40 to tell someone to stop eating pies, brush their hair and get some less embarrassing clothes and glasses? He wuz robbed!
Hang on a minute – WE wuz robbed!
and a fake tan.
Is it ‘coz ees blick ??
No, he’s “Fake Tan” Orange. Not “real tan” blick
no comments allowed on that Grauniad “Sun Employee arrested” link… Wonder why?
Because they censor the truth. You know, like Pravda did.
Do
Snu eploymee arsed ted!
Maybe they will get an Apple employee nest?
Why are we paying for the personal aggrandisement of any of them?
Please don’t imprison me for my dry rot expenses! Look at what you’ve done to me: http://www.maxfarquar.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/margaret-moran-before-and-after.jpg
Is that an advert for a diet that makes you thin (well. less fat) but less happy?
Turd polishing seems to pay well.
Regarding your Oh Mann Thread
This is just absolutely f**ki*ng pathetic Guido.
Some floppy haired, bow tied Tory type bloke was allowed to travel with the UK defence secretary, under false pretences , party to sensitive info , almost certainly benefited financially ( slightly more than 46 quid me thinks ). Dodgy, dubious, corrupt versus drinking a bottle of bubbly, paid for by someone else….get a grip.
Your arguments are getting weaker and weaker as each day passes.
Errrrrrr Me Moussa quaffs champagne every day…at UK tax payers expense !!!!!!!!
Its the hypocracy.
Its like all the labour Mps moaning about Murdoch and then going home and watching Sky Tv.
Or writing articles for The Sun.
I looked it up in the dictionary, and it didnt exist.
Imaginary dictionary…I think that’s what Prezza had.
Watching Sky TV at our expense. ‘I don’t give money to Murdoch.’ No, we the taxpayers pay for it while they watch it.
Claiming from the mug Taxpayer…..’It’s the right thing to do’ according to my best mate Gordon.
Why should I have to pay for Gordon’s kids to watch Cbeebies for free
Still hanging around this thread, Moussa? You’ve a hide as thick as rhino. Your rants remind me of one of those sad nutters who stand by the side of the road shouting and shaking his fists at the traffic.
Our Liam still thinks he will get another chance Cabinet Job. Hope springs eternal.
Have tissues ready.
The music is shite though. Best watched on mute.
Music? Oh, right, yeah. Sorry, was distracted.
Painted Jezebel – excellent.
“Man arrested over alleged police payments named as Sun journalist.”
God you must be disappointed he wasn’t from the Mirror Guido.
But been with N.I. since 1987..
Good old Tom – root out the rot…….
Been with NI since 1987… Wasn’t that when blair and brown were right up Murdoch’s fundament? What tales he’ll have to tell!
you’re a decade out – try again when sober
idiot
errrrrrr “”"”"Tom Watson’s personal aggrandisement”"”"”
I take it then, that Guido official postion is that hacking is Ok then !!!!!
Was his PR’s advice to “look more like Phill Jupitus”?
Ha!
Jupitus has a sense of humour. Watson is a vain man with delusions of grandeur and I’d would trust him to give me the time of day.
No, Mr Watson has delusions of adequacy.
“”"These payments mirror the rise in Watson’s campaign against News International as well as a shake up in his personal image…”"”
errrrrr …… Watson has been campagning against News International for over 4 years
Yeah Labour really hate sucsessful buisnesses right.
I’ve told you before, writing “errrrrrrrr” makes you look retarded.
Ever since the Sun changed sides in fact.
I used to have a care-free life like any other Labour MP in government. Surrounded by sycophants, I bathed in my own self-importance.
But then we lost the general election, and I quickly realised I would have to shape up and actually knuckle-down and do some work. And that’s when I discovered the Worry ™ Diet. Yes, lots of worry caused me to lose weight, gain a haggard, worried expression and generally force me to smarten my appearance. Look! It’s done wonders!
Of course, when we win the next election, I’ll probably let meself go again, and revert to being useless fat cunt.
Watson, you prat.
He needs to book himself into a gym. Fat mong.
hmmmmmmmm I wonder, shall I report Sue to the police for her use of such language. IP address please Guido, it can be got. New world order of Tory Briton, Social Networkers being arrested every day….You all must be sooooo proud
We regret to inform you that the Thought Police have been temporarily suspended.
Please feel free to say what you think.
Normal thought-repression will resume when Labour return to government.
Do one Moussa, you backward tw*t. Don’t you get sick of sounding like a ‘tard? I want your IP address so I can come round to your pig-pen and put you out of your misery.
Leeds ?
Cheers IPcheck. I’m homing in on the b*stard!
You’ll probably find Moussa’s address is some shitty student hovel or some DSS B&B that boards care in the community wallahs.
One of my pet hates. The idea that the only possible way of doing exercise is to go to a gym.
People who can afford a gym subscription are lazy bastards who are obviously paid too much.
just fuck more
He doesn’t need to book himself into a gym. Those flash new offices that mp’s built for themselves in labour’s time has a gym, sauna, steam room, meditation suite and an indoor pool so I believe. All for them to use for free!
Before he just looked common, now he looks stupid and common. Tenacious zit on his chin though.
Tenathus. Yeth, thath me.
It’s true. You cannot polish a turd.
Because Tom is part way through a make-over to look like this
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_hXv0e_ByoDs/SnWlByErniI/AAAAAAAAByM/jiAjiiI5M6Y/s400/thunderbirds+222.jpg
Pity he did away with that black and white striped suit – it always made me smile and think of mint humbugs or bah humbug which is probably closer to the truth with the odious twatson.
He is one of the few people that one can say without any doubt that he is neither use nor ornament.
And he’s another one that’s neither use nor ornament.
The labour party does have more than it’s fair share of dead wood.
He is a TWAT.
More of a vile, odious prick
How many more times can we have Labour Governments that leave the country in total disarray ?
Hopefully never again
Howzabout 5 May 2015 ? The way “Dave” & co are going that’s not actually as daft as it at first appears to be………
But, hang on! I’m working flat-out to ensure Miliband is our next PM, with his party enjoying a massive majority.
Isn’t this what you all want? Have I misjudged the mood of the British people, again?
Well you’re on to a bit of a loser there.
militwit couldn’t win an election if he was the only one standing.
….and your point is, Ed?
Kettle, pot, black. Ring any bells?
Balls’ tweets are really self regarding,aren’t they. He really thinks ordinary people ( other than simple minded Labour trolls) are interested in what he has to say. Deluded pillock.
This is a good point, and something that (for all his alleged intelligence) he’s too thick to notice:
He only preaches to the converted.
He’ll never increase his fanbase by only talking to mongs who already listen, and accusing those who don’t listen of being “tory scum”. Stuck in a rut, his career has flatlined. The otherwise useless wet fart Chukka Umunna will push him aside.
Who is that may be attaracted to a carreer in politics (of any party). The net affect is that thre is no one of any ability to choose from as our great leader – tory, labour or lib dem.
Good grief, piggy from Lord of the Flies.
Oh yes that’s him, well done sir.
Oi! Anyone remember me?
I do indeed, Tom Watson is your lovechild.
Yaroo!
How does he cope with being so ugly and minging
He surrounds himself with people who are even more fat and mongy than himself.
Wonder when he last had his leg over? Bet the ugly fecker can’t remember it was that long ago.
Astonishingly, he’s married. I can’t find any pictures of his wife, though.
So I bet she’s deeply fucking ugly, like him.
Neither stopped Prezza.
Nor Pickles.
If I was twenty years older, I might give Mrs Prezzer one. MILF or what!
Well he doesn’t work out does he. Much better to spend our hard earned at some swanky restaurant – or a nice 4 course meal at the Commons Bar….?
News International will get even with this plonker one day .
He is just trying to make himself look important .What a waste of
space this twit is.
Watson pay the money back you hypocrite. Now Tom speak quietly just like the labour front bench do now – shhh.
BBC’s QT needs to renamed Labour Propaganda Time. Last night Ed Balls must have had more time than the rest of the panel put together. Balls level of hypocrisy and denial reached new heights.
Are we suggesting that he’s paid out £2640 of taxpayers money to improve his appe@rance and jazz up his image?
Because if we are it hasn’t worked and it’s been a scandalous waste of money.
The Billy Bunter look or a lezza from Cell Block H, not much of a fucking choice is it? Like most consultancies they were taking the piss and then ‘aving a laugh all the way to the bank.
The G20 is over with no solutions to anything. Luckily no financial transatiuoc tax agreed either.
Why don’t they just have a video conference next time and save us all a packet?
Because the food is great.
Politician create problems that require state extortion.
They DONT solve problems.
Have you learned nothing?
We don’t use low-CO2 emission videoconferencing because it’s vital that we lead the world in reducing greenhouse gas emissions such as the CO2 from plane flights, which is causing tremendous damage to the environment and necessitates punitive green taxes.
That, and we all like to stand side by side (especially near Obama) because it makes us look important.
I saw them all jockeying for position next to Obama when the cameras came out.
What a very sad lot they all are.
The other leaders and I particularly like to pat his shoulder and laugh, like we’re his best friends.
I’ll bet you do. Still think you’re all very sad people.
A bunch of never-have-beens cosying up to yesterday’s Man.
I saw these “statesmen and women” gathering for a group photo at the G20 Conference. What a bunch of inadequates, buffoons, liars, cheats, misfits and chancers. Rumpy-pumpy, Barroso, Gillard, Cameron, Merkel, Sarkozy, Zuma, Obama,Papandreau, et al. These are world leaders? We depend on them to make decisions that will affect us all?
Jesus Christ! No wonder the world in such a shitty state.
+1
they don’t lead anything – just do as they’re told
Obama is a puppet of God’s chosen ones, like all USraeli leaders.
I totally agree (+1!)
Good idea… and perhaps the Greek PM can be strapped to a chair with electrodes attached to his gonads so that Sarko and Klebs can administer electric shock treatment from the comfort of their office ….rather than having the bother of jettting in to 5 star luxury hotels to administer the “short sharp shock” in person ??
“Be EUropeon, NEVER ASK THE PEOPLE.” : Merkozy.
Why oh effin why is my comment 4:52 awaiting moderation?
Oh well won’t get cleared now – it’s Friday – automod’s on and Guido’s staff have all cleared to the pub.
Maybe they will take photos of each other getting pissed so we can have another lame snap for next week’s caption contest.
It is Poets day.
It is indeed Billy, but not if you work shifts like me!
Have a good weekend & look after yourself.
I’ve just got to get some more lube and crack cocaine, and the weekend’s sorted.
@Rats
Beware of sockpuppets.
Have a good one
Get back out there and start selling your arse, you’ve got bills to pay!
try a bogof to drum up business
Fat ugly minger.
Another Brown turd.
Guido certainly knows how to give us a treat on a Friday afternoon, with an open-goal, trash Tom Watson thread!
I would want a refund…….He still looks a fat dumb C U N T…………..
It takes one to know one.
If he looks like a dum c u n t, walks like a dumb c u n t and talks like a dumb c u n t,
He must be a drunken, Pavlovian, hypocritical and amoral error of nature
More than a coincidence – this lazy good-for-nothing oaf is so full of himself, he can’t even be bothered to (allegedly) fiddle his expenses any more – so much easier to put the same amount in every month, leaving much more time for troughing.
I am an ace at busking
But when it comes to doing anything of substance I need bent Spinners to see me through to my next piss up
ROFL and fuck you Guido you know me too well of old
He seems to actually wash his hair nowadays
A Great Leap Forward for this Native….
Oh Duckie what are you talking about
Collar or cuffs ?
Off the record Guido
I must tell you that I have told my student Balls to vote for the increase in IMF funding
I have been wrong about everything for aboout 25 years (but have made a fortune doing so) but we need the IMF to save the world now
Take that as God’s truth (The Chief Rabbi told me so)
We know you Larry
You change your vest like I take coffee during the day (but make money on the way – over $23 million at the last count)
How come anyone takes you seriously ?
A Fat Monging Turd
Do you think any of the newspapers might run with this?
The British newspapers ?
They are only interested in Pippa’s ass, Rooney’s implant and Polly’s 5th house !
And the iPhone 4S.
I meant the Australian-American owned newspapers.
I thought Pippa owned a donkey.
I’d ride Pippa’s ass.
“Why are we paying for Tom Watson’s personal aggrandisement?”
Bcause he’s a socialist, and socialists spend other peoples money.
Socialists are, by definition, not capitalists, so they don’t make any of that evil money.
But surely, Tom’s a celeb now, isn’t he ?
Diet and hair-do does’nt disguise his ugliness, however.
Watson is chewing up the M*rdoch clan and now Guido is snapping at Watson’s heels like a little lapdog .. . no connection obviously.
Is that what twatson did when he went to america, at great expenses to we taxpayers, the other week and watched rupert murdoch get re-elected by shareholders as chairman?
It’s most likely going to be the case of ‘he who laughs last’!!
What a fat ugly mong and a hypocrite. Jog on loser.
Just another snout in the trough Dishonourable:
I keep on thinking, “fat cυnt”, when I look at his pictures.
Now, I can think that but, naturally, I can’t say that on here. Could anyone help we out with a suitable synonym?
Corpulent pudendum?
It is a good try, Engineer, but it doesn’t quite reach the grossly insulting invective standards that someone at his level of direness surely deserves.
“Useless fat fucking fat thick spazzy fat thick fucking cunt?”
That rather more closely approaches the grossly insulting invective standards that we seek but, unfortunately, it includes the mоdded term cυnt, which I was attempting to avoid.
“Useless fat fucking fat thick spazzy fat thick fucking woman’s naughty bit?”
“socialist”?
I am beginning to realise that I am searching in vain for something which cannot be found. We will have to make do with “fat spazzy cυnt” and devil take the hindmost.
“Fettfotze” should do the job, perfectly. For the love of God, don’t ask a German what it means.
**** HEALTH ALERT ****
All windowlickers are advised against using Google Images to search for that term, the more especially if they wish to enjoy some sleep tonight.
[Ends.]
*********************
He’s just another snot-gobbling pseudo-socialist – spending everone else’s money for his own ends. Surely not surprised to find another greedy-fecking snout-in-trough? Oh my word yes he is.
A face only a mother could love… surely
A face to launch a thousand dredgers.
A face the would stop a clock..
Waste of money-you can’t polish a turd.
Judging from the photos, the PR consultant’s advice can be summed up as: lose some weight, get a tan, buy some trendy glasses.
Gosh, that was well worth £2639…
Should have gone to Specsavers and not Mcdonalds. Snort it out Tom.
and “look fierce!”.
Ker ching…
I don’t like Tom Watson.
He’s quite fat, isn’t he? I wonder if his NHS doctor will refuse to treat him, should be become ill, unless he goes on a diet? And I wonder if he sticks to the prescribed number of alcohol units that the socialists have determined we, their pay-masters, should not exceed?
I’m also waiting for Mr Murdoch’s payback for people like Mr Watson. It will be a joy to behold.
Don’t get upset Tom by all of the comments. You will always be a fat twat to me.
If Watson were to take a more rounded view of politics, he might be easier to accept. However, his blinkered tribalism makes him one of those politicians who’s career will be forgotten even before it is over. He does not act for the country’s common good, he acts for for the good of his own small part of his own tribe. He is among the worst sorts of parliamentarian, and deserves to be locked in a small, windowless room with Peter Hain, Tim Yeo and Mike Hancock. For a long time.
May the fleas of a thousand badgers infest his crotch, and may his arms be too short to scratch.
Madame Guillotine beckons for these creatures.
The Scottish Tories are on their way out. Ruth Davidson beat Murdo Fraser and is now new Conservative Leader in Scotland. She only been an MP for a few months. It is the end of Scottish Tories.
With due respect the tories in scotland were always non-starters.
The scots only vote for people who will pay them endless benefits and not expect them to work.
With fuck all respect to you Nell just take your fuckwitted bigotry and stick it right up your arse.
Fuck off back to your park bench and swill yer Bucky, pizza frier.
But that wouldn’t give them much with which to differentiate Labour and the SNP. In fact the main distinctions are cheap booze (the centrepiece of the Labour election campaign) and the willingness to lie. First Ministers Questions are stunning for the sheer unremitting mendacity of the government, which far outpaces their opponents rudimentary ‘spin’ operations. Thankfully enough Scottish voters don’t read newspapers and the SNP supporters have been trained to believe all news is ‘London propaganda’ and instead just pass salacious gossip to each other via blogs.
I do think the Tories electing a Glaswegian lesbian is a shrewd move, regardless of how long she’s been in the chamber. I mean, how much experience do you need if the government just lies about its record anyway?
The Scottish are nothing but parasitic subhuman scum.
Hardly the people to vote for a party of self-reliance.
A perfect choice: nobody at all will vote Tory up there; Libdems are fucked anyway; Scottish Labour is totally scandal-ridden. => SNP win. Gives us a chance to offload Scotland before we leave the EU (just dreamin’).
Maybe England could have a referendum on independence from the welfare states?
Maybe the inglish are to much pussies to have the bals to go it alone. They have been living off Scotlands brains and brawn for three centuries.
There is only one good thing about the scots and that is their Regiments!
Finest in the World!!
They weren’t so fine at Culloden. And another thing, haggis was created by the Inglish.
They were the finest of the fine in WW1 which was long after culloden.
As for haggis well sounds very similar to goats brain or brawn or tripe or something – and once upon a time all of those things were very popular .
Mel, I think you’ll find Culloden was a battle between Scottish regiments fighting for the democratically elected government and their appointed head of state and a bunch of Catholic absolutist monarchists from the highlands. The good guys won; fuck the Jacobites.
You can’t polish a turd
The fat useless troughing fuckwit.
This tosser portrays himself as a man of the people, but the only reason he is interested in the well being of the people is so that he can continue his blood sucking leeching activities from our wallets.
Fucking Disgrace….. Set the Sunlight Team on the thieving bastard !
I don’t know what effect this man will have on the enemy, but by God, he terrifies me
Now look folks I know it’s Friday but let’s be honest – twatson from those photos has clearly lost weight – that is very commendable and it might be useful if he decided to donate his weightloss story to someone like the mirror so other obese people, like prezza, could follow his advice and slim down..
Think how much money that could save the nhs and hence us taxpayers!!
But please twatson if you really want to improve your image get rid of those heavy square framed specs . I haven’t seen anyone wearing anything like them since the 60′s and they weren’t attractive then.
He probably lost weight after sharing a needle and contracting HIV.
Mrs Thatcher (to Sir Robin Day): “Mr Day!”
Wonderful.
She did apologise profusely.
Ah! Maybe… But the damage was done.
It was all a big misunderstanding. I’d suddenly realised I was late that month.
Nell dont you agree Watson is a typical inglish c unt ! Just like inglish c unt Balls and inglish c unt Handycock . Inglish c unts the lot of them.
I suspect actually if one examined their family history one would find strong traces of troughing scots in there. Whatever is it will not have its roots in decent, hard workingclass origins.
He used to look like the comedian Peter Kay.
Yes, up until 6 days after conception. Then he started morphing into a thick fat ugly socialist mong.
…and when he was born the doctor slapped his mother.
Peter Kay is funny deliberately, whereas . . .
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HAI GUAEDEAUX
HAI GUISE
GUYYPHFF VAZZYYLLYYNN
http://www.itv.com/news/asylum-seekers-lost54722/
HANG DA PHFFHOOWKQHA
*
ASTA
Shit, Gordon’s got out of his straitjacket again.
I am beginning to get the hang of ASTA. He is an OK guy as I found out before and advised you. My translation services provides the following:
Hi Guido
Hi Guys
Guy(unclear???) vaseline
[link]
Hang the fucker
Very reasonable too.
You are Dr Doolittle and I claim my £5.
I accept and will contra it against my £5 for you being Pushmi-pullyu.
Nah – I’m someone else. Just trying out a different moniker. Not sure I like it, really.
The moniker – or the sentiments it purports to uphold?
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HAI GUISE
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ASTA
Monkies, keyboards …..
Monkies, keyboards …..
How many monkies does it take to do that ?
One.
Whatever he does or says he will still be a fat cnut.
Is fat cnutedness absolute or relative?
Is there indeed a Platonic form of fat cnutedness? (I have not read Phaedo for years.)
Do fat cnuts float when the tide comes in?
Maybe it’s a survival stratagem…
You are suggesting we can conflate the cockney slang for face with the expression All the boats rise when the tide comes in?
I was thinking more of Anglian monarchs…
Oh God! Are you going to send me off to hunt for one of my copies of the Anglo-Saxon Chronicles, which are regrettably all still in boxes? All those Æthelreds, Ealdwulfs and Wuffas?
Nah – just remember your primary school history and King Canute (Cnut) playing chicken with the North Sea.
Cnut (mercy that it escapes the mod), was King of Denmark, England, Sweden (in part) and Norway, acceding in that order. He was never considered as just an Anglian monarch, to my knowledge.
I happen to be a great fan of his. The story of his attempting to hold back the tides is, unfortunately, almost universally misunderstood nowadays. He had his throne put on the beach to prove that he was not omnipotent.
I have taken a leaf out of his book. Every so often, I make a deliberate mistake just to prove that I am not perfect…
The legend in this vicinity was that it was the Aegir tide at Gainsborough on the Trent he was playing with, and not the North Sea.
That gains him even more respect, because either he was a cool dude surfer, or got very wet very quickly as the bore wave is more than 4ft high at springs.
Never knew Cnut did all those jobs – I wonder what his expenses were like?
I only dimly remember learning about him at primary school – I neglected to learn any history thereafter, as it wasn’t compulsory.
I’d always imagined him on the beach at Skeggie…
Rendered down he’d keep a soap factory going for a year.
They could advertise it as The Only Soap That Makes You Dirtier.
That’s Eastenders, isn’t it?
Trouble is, my soap would leave nasty smears.
None of the thieving bastards should be spending any of our money on anything.
Guido are you sure you didn’t get your Steven Purcell mugshots mixed up with Fatty Watsons’?
Well that is money wasted. He looks unhappy and hostile. Maybe a petition is needed for the taxpayer to decide what can or cannot be claimed on expenses. For instance it is ok to spend taxpayers cash for travel, meals within reason, and all the basics. Expenses for gambling, pr consultants and other non essential should come out of the MP’s salary.
Why?, HMRC already has rules on expenses for us trash, why not just apply them to MPs and Lords , after all we are all in it together.
Indeed we are, “Well it’s a thought”. May I call you “Well it’s a thought”. I share your concerns about the expenses culture in Westminster and that’s why I am going to take another look at the whole issue. But what people need to understand is that we mustn’t be distracted from the real problems in the eurozone.
From milkmen to coalmen, from postmen to hedgefund managers, Britain is coming together in a spirit of can-do optimism, facing the future squarely, overcoming our rising challenges, we are saying, look, we don’t have to go on like this anymore, there is a better way forward.
++++Laugh++++
OMG! You really do sound like cameron the wet lettuce!
Well Dave my nickname is trash, for the last 18 months after helping to get you in , you have treated all of us as trash, how are those rusticles coming along hope you can make this PM job last for the 5 year tenure because that’s all you have, that’s unless you take over reddy eddy’s job.
Bored witless with the whole Greek farce until I saw this interview on Sky today.
http://news.sky.com/home/video/16103435
Now why cant we elect MP’s like that?
Does politics really have to be showbusiness for the ugly?
Socialist, so probably a rug muncher.
That’s fine by me.
A fat schoolboy or a fat manbag metrosexual?
Hey Tom you fat cnut.
You can buy me as much champagne as I can drink on the Terrace Bar and follow me around Soho with your tongue hanging out but you are still not getting even a sniff.
Do you hear me – not a sniff.
I’d rather give Geoff Hoon a bj.
So that’s where the guy who played Roland in Grange Hill ended up.
Must be something good on tele. Nobody’ posting.
Fireworks night – folks are out burning figurative guy fawkes and enjoying their hot punch and bbq’d sausages whist thinking what a sad mess our politicians have become.
And I’m watching the Greek PM’s speech on News 24…
I feel sad now! I want a BBQ’d sausage!
Thought that was the fifth, nell. But as it’s a Friday, they’ll be starting early, no doubt.
Nothing I have ever been to beats Lewes. They burn everyone in effigy there including the Pope. No one ever dare oppose it on the grounds of political correctness. They even manufacture their own fireworks.
Sounds good to me – ours has been cancelled this year by some councillors who said it wasn’t good for our carbon footprint!!
There’s been such a fuss there’s talk of a u turn next year and some folks are saying they’ll be making effigies to burn of certain idiots!!
Were they LibDampers, LabourLightOut or GreenSapBurnsBadlyBrigade?
I hate to say it but one of them particularly was a tory talking about how geese are shot out of the sky with these evil fireworks and how she’s glad they’ve banned them!!
Being a meat eater it’s sound to me like a good way to hunt food – not that I’ve ever seen a goose fall out of the sky in 30 years of watching this particular fireworks display!!
Politicians are not what they used to be!!
She is obviously mentally unstable.
All politicians are bad unless proved otherwise.
Unfortunately Cat – even these worthless local councillors, these days, are paid a fortune by us the taxpayer.
Lewes seemed like a nice place, shame about the traffic wardens. One tried to put a ticket on my car whilst I was 30′ away, getting a parking ticket from a machine. When I called out, he looked rather sheepish. The cunt had been hiding, waiting..
So far as I’m concerned, Lewes and its population can be nuked. I’m never going back. That’d be a fireworks display worth watching.
Foreign plates are such a benefit.
I use the congestion zone whenever I am back. You can get along so much quicker without the traffic.
I recall one occasion driving from Ashbourne back to Macclesfield (a road infested with stupidly low speed limits and fund raising cameras), following a chap with Belgian plates who gleefully set off every single camera.
I almost envied him, but then remembered the Belgian plates…
I got done earlier this year in Germany whilst driving on Austrian plates. They now have a sharing arrangement and the fine duly arrived. It was €10. That was it – no points or having to inform the insurer resulting in a certain increase in renewal costs. I can cope with that…
he’s got one of those faces that you would never tire of kicking to a fucking pulp (the overweight blob of shite)
A Snake oil salesman dealing in smoke and mirrors to further the socialist cause and his own personal enrichment = scum total scum
True but that could apply to any one of the labour front benches and a fair few of their back benchers.
And whilst I would not yet go so far as to apply that description to any of the tory ministers – some of them are getting quite close to it aren’t they?
+1
(I’ve been writing posts that are too long lately, so I’ll just quietly agree!)
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2057660/G20-Summit-Tory-revolt-Cameron-pledges-increase-UKs-IMF-contribution.html
another tory revolt on the way over cameron’s plan to give the imf more of our £billions to bailout greece and possibly italy.
and labour are being coy now and not saying whether they will or won’t vote with cameron to give europe more money. So much for the word of wouldbechancellor ed’can’t live within my means’ balls who said earlier that they would veto any more money.
Presumably, Balls is awaiting his instructions from Brendan Barber.
“another tory revolt”.
Come on, that’s like Winston Smith thinking there was “an underground movement.” There was no underground movement, there’s no Tory revolt. All Tories are utter filthy slime, pro-EU traitors. No exceptions.
If there were exceptions, they’d have moved against Cameron by now.
Why are we paying for Tom Watson’s personal aggrandisement?
That should be obvious.
Because he’s a (insert degenative expletive of choice).
How to lose lbs and still look ugly, join weight watchers.
How to lose kilo’s, join the euro, eat italian food and still look ugly.
How to lose friends, lose weight and still be Tom Watson.
God. Have the BBC got a work experience chap translating the Greek PM’s speech in Athens? It’s impossible to follow.
Just don’t bother watching the BBC.
Sky has quite a reasonable translator – not that I listened to much of it. But the parliament was clapping him in places so I presume he’s going to win his confidence vote. then again………
Greece is sunk. Italy is sunk. Spain is sunk. Portugal is sunk. France is sunk. The EU is sunk.
The only unknown is: every day until the EU sinks, Cameron’s going to give them £50million; so, how many fifty millions is Cameron going to give until he stops wasting our money?
From what I read today, Berlusconi’s coalition is about to fall apart, too.
Hope it does – time the Northern League got a crack at sorting the southern Italian benefits claimants and mafia appointees out…
True Paragnostic , but I shall miss the Berlusconni clown when he’s gone , and that’ll not be long now.
You have to admit he’s been good for a chuckle and a laugh for a long time now .
Of course he’s made the italians the laughing stock of europe moreso than gordon made us the laughing stock of the international circuit, so no doubt they’ll be glad to be shut of him when he goes.
I will say this of the Bunga Bunga king. At school in the early 60s, I remember the history teacher talking about the Italian government which changes every five minutes. As I grew older, I realised just how true his words were. Il Cavaliere was the first prime minister to serve for any decent length of time. He changed the game there. Even Prodi got a longer spell than normal because he followed Berlusconi.
Greece, Italy, Spain ….. all sunk ? Watson must have gone for a dip in the Med.
It’s probably impossible to follow with a perfect translation.
Twattledum and Twattledee?
One has to give twatson credit for his weightloss programme.
It is shocking however that he’s prepared to use several thousands of taxpayers money to try and re-cast his permanently tainted image.
The truth is, like gordon, balls, mcbride, dolly, militwit the teaboy – these people are permanently cemented into the popuar history of the UK as backstabbers, smearers and liars .
And of course anyone associated closely with gordon’s no.10 circle is rightly condemned for all time as being supporters of economic incompetence and gross overspend and catastrophic, not to mention chaotic, administration.
We probably paid for his new wardrobe – Savile Row, no doubt.
It is a rather snazzy suit – about £2/3000 I’d have thought from some fancy london tailor.
I have no doubt he’s put it on expenses just as bercow put his wedding suit on expenses.
other people’s money = bottomless pit to them
Watson a C-unt.
hats all
Watson has a face that is made for radio.
A face baseball bats were made for.
I’d have to talk to young nell, young mr nell and mr nell about that Bill.
cricket’s a religion in our household – I wouldn’t dare sign without asking what they thought first !!
Fuck off you arsewipe
y’know twatson that language is very unbecoming.
If you’re really serious about your makeover then you must also moderate your expressions.
@nell 257 was a Tat not you.
It’s Ok Bill – no worries.
No bang for you tonight, i guess you are pissed of about.
Ps i earned more tonight than you will earn in week (tax free) .
Who is the arsewipe now?
Feck of you fat owl Twatson!
http://www.radiotymes.co.uk/ekmps/shops/widmark17/images/billy-bunter-gerald-campion-50-p.jpg
Pies: £400 / month.
PR / image consultancy: £652.08 / month.
Getting loads of publicity despite being a useless fat cnut – Priceless.
Pies: £400 / month.
PR / image consultancy: £652.08 / month.
Getting loads of publicity despite being a useless fat cnut – Priceless.
Prezza and he must eat a sizeable proportion of Mattessons’ output. They should take out life assurance on them both.
Mattesons shares would drop like a stone………bit like Prezza, really.
Yarooh!
Good Lord the greeks have made prezza their finance minister – he’s spe@king in their parliament now!!
As for twatson and his makeover I suspect he’s been taken in hand by hain the tangoed one.
I wonder how much those spray tanning sessions cost – and how much of you do they spray?
I luv it here, and i love Guido
Fat c u n t
Phisog. That’s the word I’ve been looking for.
twatson has a phisog that will never change regardless of facelifts or spray tans.
You’d recognise him anywhere, anytime!!
Evening Nell. For some strange reason I always thought it was fizzog. Yet physiogomy is the proper word for face sciency stuff, so phisog is a lot closer. You learn something new every day (and I’ll be 50 next year). I take it that it wasn’t mrnelljnr with the laptop then..
Hmmm – showed that photo to young mr nell and even he wasn’t sure that he wasn’t him!!
He was in london that day on business and wore a grey hoodie on his way home through waterloo and kings cross and said he sat on the floor at some point with his laptop, around teatime waiting for a train !!!!
50 next year eh?! Congrats. Half a Century . Wow!
I alas am even older . I like to think that each year is an accumulation of wisdom!
I love you too, Billy. It’s a shame your brain was never allowed to fully develop.
You’re still cheap at the price, I suppose. Have you paid the advertisers for October?
george papandreou wins his confidence vote then .
Don’t think it’s going to stop the rot in the eu – but no doubt cameron will keep pandering to the german hausfrau and the poison french dwarf for a bit longer until he realises he’s on a hiding to nothing!!
of them. I am off to bed as I think I am going to sleep.
When I wake up in the morning, I hope that this is all a bad dream. Tony and Gordon never occurred. Cameron is a good democratic, right of centre prime minister with a full mandate, the Euro is going from strength to strength, racing with the pound and that Greek and Italy are models of financial probity.
I shall be surrounded by a bevy of scantily-clad young beauties that will put Silvio’s harem to shame.
The sound of pigs flapping in the sky …
a young john wayne, a young paul newman or a young marlon brando especially ……. we all have our dreams!!
???? OMG the automod has come back to life!!
‘Night folks.
Sweet Dreams.
Laters nell
a young john wayne, a young p@ul newman or a young marlon brando especially ……. we all have our dreams!!
The stats will turn up at sometime.
Were you calling order-order, sir? Oh, I see. If they do, they’ll probably get modded though. Shall I put them in a bin or just leave them outside the constituency office?
Mod on the piss tonight.
fair enough
I’ve never been on this website before tonight, but WOW. I haven’t got anything particularly against or for Tom Watson, but sitting around calling someone a fat c u n t like a bunch of keyboard warriors makes you all sound like really intelligent – not to mention super-tough – macho-men. Good work! I wonder how many of you are overweight? I’m guessing plenty. Even better – the post itsef didn’t actually have any evidence of any wrongdoing whatsoever, just lurid insinuation! Unlike News International who most certainly were breaking the law I might add. How anyone can defend that lot even using the fallback of “we shouldn’t hurt business” is just unbelieveable.
This thread of comments could be summed up as a string of predominantly (although not all) incoherent, sexist, bigoted, childish, moronic and occasionally racist (against the French, Germans, etc) insults. Someone earlier in the thread mentioned that if these G20 politicians were our leaders then no wonder we’re in trouble, but I’d add that if you lot are the great thinkers amongst us then we’re just as f*cked.
Maybe some constructive ideas and debate rather than just slagging off everyone else for the world’s and your own problems would help get us somewhere instead of just calling people c u n t s on online forums all day long. I tend to find most people who go round calling people c u n ts probably shouldn’t do so because they generally end up being regarded as just that by everyone else.
No doubt this will get moderated out as not being what the target audience want to hear, but that’s what you expect from people who don’t want to hear opposing views and would rather fester in their hate-orgy together rather than getting a life and working towards actually making things better in our society!
PS I look forward to you all also calling me a c u n t for having the temerity to not 100% agree with your charming attitude towards other people and life in general!
Goodnight, Harriet.
To be fair, that response actually made me laugh
+1
Take a full 100% refund and Foxtrot Oscar.
Proof that Watson is wrong’un:
What a total and complete utter C’unt!
Bollocks.
You should have mentioned it earlier.
You could try looking at the more constructive bits- there are some. But oh no, you’re going to have a go anyway. You’re not my ex, are you?
“Maybe some constructive ideas and debate”. Hmmmmm “I’ve never been on this website before tonight” and it shows. This isn’t ‘that kind’ of website. You go here to read stories which haven’t been reported in the major papers (yet) and to see what comments people are willing to make anonymously which they wouldn’t be willing to post on ConservativeHome.
good post. the regular posters on this site though are clearly repellent. I wouldn’t expect much from them.
I delight in being repellent, especially to holier-than-thou idiots like the person who spent ages typing that encomium to Twatsonnery above.
I also indulge in anti-Scots bigotry (it’s fun when they bite).
Sometimes I do put a coherent and reasoned argument together, which is usually greeted by some moron blaming Thatcher / bankers / etc.
The use of invective, especially when referring to a waste of skin like Mr Watson, is an art form – presumably it offends, and indeed it would be rather a shame if it did not do so.
Please feel free to be offended – after all, it’s probably the most fun you’ll have all weekend.
The regular posters on CiF are clearly repellent. I wouldn’t expect much from them.
‘Never been on this website before tonight.’ Really?
It’s ironic that you criticise anonymous posters when your friend above has posted anonymously!
No dear, it’s when you try to post on CiF that the posts are moderated if they are not what the target audience wants to hear. Go back to the Guardian. Please.
Well “Anonymous” – it is clear that Watson has got right into your musical keyboard hasn’t he?
I fully expect you think he is wonderful for your Labour youth career advancement or whatever you aspire to (or whatever he aspires to do inside you more like!), but to my mind, Watson only ever has been about promoting himself and his long list of union cronies, whilst destroying a free press so it can’t report what he and his cronies do all day in their taxpayer funded lives.
Watson represents everything bad about labour politics. Thanks to him, your once great labour party stagnates daily in opposition under the leadership of Militwat. Now I am happy to keep the Tories in till 2150 thankyou very much, as it keeps you socialist meddlers out from interfering in my hard worked for lifestyle.
But FOR YOU – well, its fantastic that you think he’s such a great man. He keeps you socialist shits out of power. Happy times for me on that score. But, all I hope is that the west bromwich Tories seriously shake Watson out at some point as the local people would be better off for it and taxpayers would too!
Then again, this is West Bromwich isn’t it I forgot. The great rotten borough of Sandwell. No doubt the locals love claiming all their highly inflated social cash taxpayer funded benefits that they haven’t earned either, so, actually, constituents and their MP are probably suited to each other rather well!
i posted 2 hours ago what an ugly HuntTTTT peice of socialist excrement this fucker is
2 hours later well plastered fuck all has changed
sorry ………delete previous watson fat Hunt.fat bastard utter stinking lefty Hunt
No doubt it will transpire that this professional service
was Bum Sex
and the money was being paid to his boyfriend !
Why do we put up with these corrupt bastards ?
Healthy living initiative, one MP at a time?
Guido. keep up the good work exposing the thieving bastards
WeightWatchers would have been cheaper !
I advise you to lose about 8 stone ASAP you fat twat !
That will be £652.08 thank you !
Morning sir. Hope you are in the very finest of fettle.
Mornin ar cat trust you also are well
just off to work yet again !
rimming tramps
Bend over my dear friend and I will stick a lighted Roman Candle up your arse and retire swiftly.
Head of uk boarder force suspended along with two other senior bosses after telling staff at passport control not to scan passports for forgeries !
i bet he awarded himself a 48% pay rise for his latest little plan to cut immigration !
Explains why THAT preacher on exclusion list miraculously turned up in London when May had supposedly put veto on him entering U|K….you couldn’t make it up,,,,”We’re having complaints from tourists about queues at Heathrow…shall we put on more staff ?” “Nah ! I tell you what let’s not just do the security checks instead that’ll speed things up !” The UK Border Force(LOL)are bloody lucky there wasn’t a terrorist incident as a result of their failing in their statutory duty. As well as being sacked the Head of the UK Border Force and his senior managers should face criminal charges….i.e. ” Gross Misconduct/ Negligence in Public Office….and a very public bollocking by the Home Afffairs Committee screened live
It’s fucking rich that the home affairs committee into curbing immigration
is being chaired by , an immigrant
the ever slimy Keith Vaz
Typical Fabian – they delight in pulling the ladder up after themselves.
You only have to look at the expensively educated Labour twats who want to kill grammar schools to see that.
I’m glad someone pointed that out. There were also recent cases where judges had decided that various undesirable illegal immigrants should be allowed to stay in Britain, for the most spurious reasons. The judges had fine English names such as “Khalid al Achbar”, or suchlike.
The lunatics really have been put in charge of the asylum (pun intended).
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ADDYYDDAWL
ZOOUWHN, YYDDOUWHYYLLBBYY DYM
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ASTA
Previous immigration bods have included Barbara Roche and Jack Straw. Say no more.
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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-15616858
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ASTA
Please put another post up. Everytime I come back here I think I’ve ended up on the Crimewatch site by mistake.
i thought the right-wing cretins who lurk all the time on this site were libertarians? Didn’t know you were so happy with a newspaper group owning your government, owning the police and hacking murder victims. Tom Watson is worth a thousand of you losers.
The left didn’t do too badly being owned by the same newspaper group, but showed how hateful they could be when scorned by voters, get a grip and use your own brain and stop being part of the problem, your coming across as a hate filled tribal lefty.
Scott Walker?
Your Brel covers were shit, pal.
I think the point being made is that the Labour Party are hypocrits over the matter not the fact that there is probably some force to their argument over the power of NI in UK politics which needs curbing or the fact that some of their journos engaged in illegal phone-hacking
Those were the days. The Pyjama parties, the charity events and the baby showers. How I miss my friends now that Gordon has alienated then all.
Without “losers” like us, your beloved Parasite Party wouldn’t have had any money to spray all over mindless little chavs such as yourself.
What Twatson needs is a Fat Wah.
I thought a Fat Wah was what you got when Pete Wylie went to seed?
Isn’t that sum dim
We have 6 weeks to save the Euro….(oh bugger…failed!)
Morning fellow window lickers
Good morning William
Morning.
I wonder where that stats are?
Patience Billy. The mod was on the sauce last night
76% of statistics are made up, and the other 42% are wrong.
arse lickers more like..
Hellloooo?
There once was a trougher named Tom,
Who wished to perform with aplomb
His image consultant
Declared the resultant
A triumph, for a pig from West Brom.
There was a PM named Davey,
whose brain was made of gravy.
He was thick, he was shit, he was a complete utter prick,
and he scrapped our airforce and navy.
At least try to make it scan, ffs!
Cameron’s still not as bad as the Monocular Mentalist – he’s doing his best, but there’s a way to go yet before he’s as reviled as that cretinous Caledonian who sold the gold and spent your grandchildren’s taxes on bedwetters and immigrants.
It wasn’t Cameron who signed us up for two aircraft carriers we couldn’t afford with contracts we can’t get out of, was it? Admittedly, we should be keeping the Harrier and Nimrod going for a bit longer, but when Labour were wasting billions mismanaging defence projects and billions more on Tony’s Iraq adventure, they ignored the 40 billion black hole they were leaving for the future.
Please come back when you have developed an ear for the rhythms of English, and have a better criticism of Rusty than “he’s doing what he has to do because there’s no money left” – we all think he’s a prick too, but lefty whingeing won’t make it better.
For all the Billy fans out there, how does an umpire celebrate when his home country win the world cup and he is on the field? Lets ask Billy.
Why is he wearing those silly clothes?
“Bill Bunter”… cripes!
Only 19 posts from Bowden’s greatest fan. He’s slipping…
Why are all the top Greek politicians called Papa-summatorother? Where are the Mamas? (Forget about Mama Cass, she ate one too many baklavas).
Its a sex offender with a blow dry who is such a peasent that he doesnt own collar stiffeners
Turds do not polish,, as can be seen here.
sick of all those jibes,? Fed up with being called Fat Kneck?,want,to get red of 10lbs of Ugly fat… Chop ye’r head off
The man is an arsehole.
And he’s ugly, too.
From a XXXL , spotty cu*t to a XL spotty Cu*t in one easy move.
errrrrm is it a Motoring question, is it a * Frog Eyed Sprite*
What an odious little wank shaft. Typical left wing champagne piggy and a hypocrit. I have more respect for a winnet stuck to my arse cheek. Hunt face tom watson crawl back under your rock you fat useless ring piece.
Hi Guido – seen the great campaigners FoI request re Downing Street flat on his blog ? Just sent him this supportive comment : wonder if he’ll allow it, in the spirit of openness and democratic debate that he espouses ?
Dear Mr Watson – I applaud your unceasing struggle to ensure probity, transparency and moral scrupulousness by those in the public domain.
In a similar spirit, could you please set out in full in this blog all parliamentary claims you have made that relate to improvements in any first or second home that you have had, that has been paid for from the public purse ? Would you further reveal how much of this public investment in such properties that you have repaid to date, from the proceeds of the sale of any such property ? Finally, how you intend to set about repaying the balance of this public investment in your private properties in the future ?
I feel sure that your moral scrupulousness would not permit you to make a private profit out of the public purse, as some of your colleagues seem to believe is their entitlement.
As a vociferous fighter on behalf of the downtrodden, you would know better than most that any public money invested to your personal benefit is at the expense of supporting the hard working families of Britain.
I look forward to seeing your reply on your blog. You are a great campaigner against censorship, and for transparency, so will no doubt be delighted to respond to this message publicly through this page.