November 4th, 2011

Friday Caption Contest (Digital Engagement Edition)

Labour’s Quiet Digital Revolution – Alex Smith

A niche one this week, but a bottle of Glenfiddich for the wittiest winner…


254 Comments

  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “After smear gate i was told to man up”

    Like

  2. 2
    Tax Payer says:

    Ee’sh my besht mate

    Like

  3. 3
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Dolly on the casting couch of the next all woman shortlist”

    Like

  4. 4
    I Squiggle says:

    Er.. surely Movember is just the moustache?

    Like

  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    Dolly meets only man who hasn’t shagged his wife

    Like

  6. 6
    I Squiggle says:

    And for my next song.: “Buddy can you spare a dime..” ..please?

    Like

    • 235
      Plink (hic) says:

      Dear ol’ palsh, jolly ol’ pals….S(w)inging togevva in orl kindsa wevva, dear ol’ palsh, jolly ol’…. Hic

      Like

  7. 7
    Who the fuck is the thin one ? says:

    Draper by name – draper by nature

    Like

  8. 8
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    Guido: I hope you gave the photographer good money for having to spend time in a room with a pissed and smiling Draper.

    Like

  9. 9
    Paul Anka says:

    Not exactly what I had in mind.

    Like

  10. 10
    Anonymous says:

    When do you get the gastric band, Derek?

    Like

  11. 12
    Baron Von Richterscale says:

    Kate Garraway has changed!!

    Like

  12. 13
    Steve Miliband says:

    ”Psychotherapize this”

    Like

  13. 14
    Zeno says:

    Drunken tramp molests Assange.

    Like

  14. 15
    I Squiggle says:

    And when the door to the five ‘spacemen’ was finally opened after a 520 day experiment, there were only two of them. Hmmn…

    Like

  15. 16
    Sue says:

    Dolly’s psychotherapy patient demands a refund.

    Like

  16. 17
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “the Jack Dromey look-a-like contest gets off to a good start”

    What does “Zing” mean?

    Like

  17. 18
    rotten cripple says:

    Heh, Leave my new beau alone, Kate and I couldn’t come to terms on ‘brown love’.

    and I stole his white cane!

    Like

  18. 19
    touchy feely says:

    This is the last time I come to this dump for Shiatsu.

    Like

  19. 20
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Car crash interview from Sarkozy.

    Dolly. “bail me out and I’ll pay you in Euros.”

    Like

  20. 22
    vladikavkaz says:

    Get your hands off me you fat smelly c*nt.

    Like

  21. 23
    rotten cripple says:

    Psycho and the rapist

    A new play about the new new new new Labour parteh.

    Like

  22. 24
    Henry Crun says:

    “When the escort agency said they would send a real dolly I was really disappointed that they meant this twat.”

    Like

  23. 25
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Drapers reunion in Berkly is a small and private affair”

    Like

  24. 26

    “My friends has no nose..”

    “How does he smell?”

    “No. I mean he actually has no nose..take a look.”

    Like

  25. 27
    Sue says:

    Draper isn’t doing well at his AA meeting.

    Like

  26. 28
    vladikavkaz says:

    The ‘Daily Politics’ couch has really dumbed down in recent weeks.

    Like

  27. 29
    Jimmy says:

    Relax. He may have an unhealthy obsession with me but even he wouldn’t put a spycam in my house.

    Like

  28. 30
    jenny talia says:

    Gerrof you fat lazy Cun t! Don’t drop an E and try coming on to me, you’re married!

    I’m not married.

    Oh ok, meet in the back yard under the apple tree in five…

    Like

  29. 31
    Oldrightie says:

    Do you think I’m fat, young man?

    Like

  30. 32
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Dolly homemade version of “if you tolorate this then you children will be next” goes down like a lead ballon”

    Like

  31. 33
    IBOGAINE says:

    Pull the Drapes over the Toilet

    Like

  32. 34
    vladikavkaz says:

    May you have a Smith Foundation…

    Like

    • 132

      I’ts an Institute! An Institute!
      The SMITH INSTITUTE!

      And it DR Dolly if you don’t mind.

      I didn’t send $38.99+tax for a diploma from California for nothing.

      Like

  33. 35

    Asda George everyday office shirt -£11.99
    Tesco ‘anytime’ jeans – £4.50
    Silver wedding band – £18.99

    Back in the Labour parties embrace -Priceless

    {Priceless for GF&co anyway}

    Like

  34. 36
    vladikavkaz says:

    I don’t like the look of yours much.

    Like

  35. 38
    b 345t says:

    everbody out!

    Like

  36. 39
    say what you see says:

    Is that the fat fucker Fawkes on the right?

    Like

  37. 40
    yeah, right.. says:

    In this week’s Hello!

    Jonny Vegas and Julian Assange show us around their beautiful love nest.

    Like

  38. 41
    Steve Miliband says:

    Derek make up with Anton

    Like

  39. 44
    b 34st says:

    Labour to tighten belts

    Like

  40. 45
    Old Canute says:

    “Mr D Raper, I presume?”

    Like

  41. 46
    Anonymous says:

    “Lying twat said he used to work for the PM”

    Like

  42. 47
    annette curton says:

    Don’t think twice its all right.

    Like

  43. 48
    b 34st says:

    paunch and rudie

    Like

  44. 49
    albatross says:

    Embarressed? I can always remove my ring if it facilitates matters.

    Like

  45. 50
    12345678910 says:

    “Here’s another one I smeared”

    Like

  46. 51
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Dolly auditions for “strickly cum Dancing”

    Like

  47. 53
    b 34st says:

    well hello dolly

    Like

  48. 54
    27feet says:

    Alex, I think people are onto us again. Only yesterday Kate said: “considering you two are a pair of c**ts you really should get smear tested’ “

    Like

  49. 55
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Anon Leaker in Hermain Cain affiar found”

    Like

  50. 56
    Dream talker says:

    I love shex in the shitty

    Like

  51. 59
    b 34st says:

    go to work on an oaf

    Like

  52. 60
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    “He’sh my bestesh mate, is wotishname”.

    Like

  53. 61
    Drunk Panda says:

    “Who’s that prick draped over my shoulder?”

    Like

  54. 62
    Ghost of Greg Stone. says:

    Dolly engages from the left.
    or
    Dolly talks RAM.
    or
    Drapers checks shirt to see if it lifts
    or
    Dolly attempts to reach a wider community.

    Like

  55. 63
    Stinkfinger says:

    Stripes are so much more flattering for the figure.Don’t you agree?…*Hic*

    Like

  56. 64
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “thanks for lending me that fiver, Hic!”

    Like

  57. 65
    Jess The Dog says:

    “Louise! Louise! Louise! Lou-ise! Nooooooo……..”

    Like

  58. 67
    annette curton says:

    And this is not my only precious ring.

    Like

  59. 68
    This is less fun than usual says:

    ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz

    Like

  60. 71
    BSE Productions Ltd says:

    Stars of Duck Soup remake relax after piss-poor day’s filming

    Like

  61. 72
    Well it's a thought says:

    Excitement at minions conference as master is seen to be saying hello to all minions.

    Like

  62. 73
    Neil says:

    I’m either really drunk or I’m hallucinating this Hunt.

    Like

  63. 74
    b 34st says:

    tosser and dosser

    Like

  64. 75
  65. 76
    Billy Bowden in the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Little and large”

    Like

  66. 77
    Well it's a thought says:

    Enjoyment as Cameron is announced as next Liebour leader.

    Like

  67. 78
    b 34st says:

    new blog

    labour pissed

    Like

  68. 80
    Billy Bowden in the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    im not reely a dolly

    Like

  69. 82
    Billy Bowden in the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “it takes two to tango”

    Like

  70. 83
    Stinkfinger says:

    So I says to er “Kat…Kate you might ferking put the food on the table but remember I know people…I know…people….Fukinwazitalkinabout”

    Like

  71. 85

    Fancy a spot of badger watching?

    Like

  72. 86
    Well it's a thought says:

    Two hippies remember old times when the only thing they had to remember was not getting caught out.

    Like

  73. 88
    Billy Bowden in the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Move over there is room for two on this sofa”

    Like

  74. 89
    Billy Bowden is the world's greatest umpire! says:

    Gent in the blue shirt

    “This application does not support Microsoft Internet Explorer 6. Please use a different browser.”

    Like

  75. 92
    Well it's a thought says:

    Tick tick tick, reddy eddy has just added a time bomb to his staff.

    Like

  76. 94
    Rat's arse says:

    Fat bastard having a grope.

    Like

  77. 95
    b 34st says:

    looking at the cock of the day

    Like

  78. 96
    Dugald MacMillan says:

    Have you seen my wives great boobs?

    No, but I can see yours dolly …

    Like

  79. 97
    Piers Morgan says:

    I take it back.Kate didn’t set the bar too low otherwise that fat C*nt wouldn’t have got under it.

    Like

  80. 100
    Up sh1t creek says:

    He man watch your hands, I know you’ve got a reputation for smearing things!

    Like

  81. 101
    Rabid Hamster says:

    Johann Hari’s comeback interview was going to need some serious ‘polishing’ if he was going to be able to submit quotes in anything other than drunken gibberish.

    Like

  82. 102
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “dolly caught i n the act of smearing again”

    Like

  83. 107
    Rat's arse says:

    Look at me I’m Sandra Dee…………

    Like

  84. 108
    Pip says:

    “I see dead people”

    Like

  85. 110
    Thrill Seeker says:

    Guido will you please post something else. This is boring.

    Like

  86. 111
    Steve Miliband says:

    Self important fat bloke poses for stupid photo while drunk

    Like

  87. 113
    Our Denry says:

    Ahhhh, don’t they look a lovely couple

    Like

  88. 114
    Martin Day says:

    Dolly exhausted after saying

    ” I’m a nihilist at heart, always have been. I see people as individuals but realize that the majority see themselves as part of one group or another. There is no cure for the mass behaviour modification which has been inflicted on us… and at this point where the elites seem to be racing to carry through their agendas before events overtake them the support of the majority of “citizens” will carry us all into another global conflict. I watched question time last night and as usual was disgusted at the support these so called thinkers get for their fear inducing warmonger stance. They threaten us all with disaster if we question the status quo while dragging us all towards annihilation. Do we deserve to survive?”

    Like

  89. 116
    Geoffrey G Brooking says:

    Dolly turned Wally :)

    Like

  90. 119
    Sir William Waad says:

    “I’m sorry, but there’s just no demand for a Wurzels tribute band” snapped Mr Feinstein.

    Like

  91. 120
    AC1 says:

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS HE THANKED IMF FOR MONETARY OFFER; `NOT NEEDED’

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS ITALY REFUSED MONETARY HELP FROM IMF

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS ITALY NOT GIVING UP ANY SOVEREIGNTY TO IMF

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS IT’S `MENTALLY ILL’ TO ABANDON MAJORITY

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS PARLIAMENTARY REBELS WILL RETURN TO FOLD

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS HE CONTINUES TO HAVE `SOLID MAJORITY’

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS NO OTHER FIGURE IN ITALY CAN LEAD COUNTRY

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS HE FEELS `OBLIGED’ TO CARRY ON IN OFFICE

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS ITALY HAS NEVER HAD TROUBLE SERVICING DEBT

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS DEBT NEVER PRESENTED PROBLEMS UNTIL NOW

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS ITALIAN BANKS ARE SOLID, THRIFTY FAMILIES

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS ITALY HAS `HEREDITARY’ HIGH DEBT

    *BERLUSCONI SAYS ‘I lie whenever my lips move’

    That last one’s true, but B didn’t say it.

    Like

    • 142
      Tony B. Liar says:

      He learned from the master.
      I taught him on our shared holidays.

      Like

    • 150
      Anonymous says:

      Very soon Berlusconi’s opinions are going to matter even less than they do now.

      Italy is f*cked. It’s only a matter of time.

      Like

    • 174
      annette curton says:

      History repeats itself,
      Berlusconi gets rescued from a mountain top, a daring raid by SS Storm Troopers, whisked away in Fieseler Storch to G20 meeting in Cannes, but pragmatism should tell him it’s only a matter of time before he gets strung up on a lamp post by his people.

      Like

    • 177
      annette curton says:

      Rep*at.
      History rep*ats itself,
      Berlusconi gets rescued from mountain top, a daring raid by SS Storm Troopers, whisked away in Fieseler Storch to G20 meeting in Cannes, but pragmatism should tell him it’s only a matter of time before he gets strung-up on a lamp post by his own people.

      Like

  92. 121
    Steve Miliband says:

    Labour listing

    Like

  93. 122
    Stinkfinger says:

    Derek Draper (failed writer) stars in his first gay porn film ‘Rum,bum and a slash’

    Like

  94. 125
    (I've been renamed) DA-Notice says:

    My preciousssss.

    Like

  95. 128
    nell says:

    If you’re a pal of ed miliband’s will you tell him how good I’d be running a website for him?

    Like

  96. 131
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Dolly finally gets his own sockpuppet”

    Like

  97. 133
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Dolly goes campiaging for the local erections”

    Like

  98. 134
    Screw-Fix says:

    Draper’s Tool

    Like

  99. 135
    d raper says:

    My ring is feeling surprisingly tight.

    Like

  100. 137
    Sue on The Run says:

    Labour hold a farewell party for Brown’s old chum the Draper.

    Like

  101. 139
    • 153
      sockpuppet #4 says:

      Very much so. But they’ve already got their own winner there in the url/headline.

      Did they do that on purpose?

      Like

    • 176
      Cameron gives another "Cast Iron Promise" on Europe says:

      So nice to see “strong leadership” from the World’s leaders….2 days in Cannes and nothing very much to show for it….except rhetoric….and absolute bucket loads of bullshit from “Dave” about not allowing the British Taxpayer to put monies into euro bail out via IMF…..so that’s definite then…British Taxpayers will be contributing to bailing out the eurozone before Xmas……

      Like

      • 185
        The lights are going out all over Europe.. says:

        And no vote in Parliament either..it seems

        Q: Will there be a vote in the Commons on any future contribution to the IMF?

        Cameron says there has already been a vote follow the last decision to increase Britain’s contributions. That vote allowed for some “headroom”. Any extra contribution would be within that headroom.

        • Cameron says there will be no parliamentary vote on any decision to increase Britain’s contributions to the IMF.

        http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2011/nov/04/g20-leaders-eurozone-crisis-live-coverage

        Like

  102. 141
    Karolidies says:

    Backdoor Dolly

    Like

  103. 147
    not funny says:

    Alex Smith pulls trollied Dolly

    Like

  104. 148
    Sue says:

    Single Malt. Very nice. It looks like the Draper has already swallowed it. Guido, I would check your drinks cabinet if I were you. You can’t trust these Labour fucks up with anything. They would sell their own or other people’s children if they thought they could profit from it.

    Like

  105. 149
    Josiah Bartlett says:

    Dolly had clearly taken the “I hate myself and want a pie” route after being sacked by Gordon Brown.

    Like

  106. 155
    Martin Day says:

    Alex Smith to Dolly

    “What do you do if Kate Garroway starts smoking?

    Dolly to Alex Smith

    “Use some lube”.

    Like

  107. 159
    mark says:

    “let’s do it like they do it on the discovery channel”

    Like

  108. 161
    nell says:

    dolly draper drunk.

    Like

  109. 162
    Anonymous says:

    Male Grooming

    Like

  110. 165
    bergen says:

    Derek tries to butter up the neighbours following Kate’s bust-up with them over their new extension.

    Like

  111. 166
    Karolidies says:

    Arsehole arseholed

    Like

  112. 167

    Cum the revolution…

    Like

  113. 168
    anon says:

    Pressed before the mast!

    Like

  114. 169
    Karolidies says:

    Washing his hair in chip fat hadn’t been one of Dolly’s better ideas.

    Like

  115. 171
    Cynic says:

    After Gordon you are my bestest friend

    Like

  116. 172
    Tooth fairy says:

    Lord Charles had really let himself go over the years!

    Gockle o geer, gockle o geer!

    Like

  117. 179
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Is the window-licker looking guy from the Sunshine bus saying to his carer, “You be Laurel, I’ll be Hardy, and then I can say, that’s another fine mess you’ve got me into.”

    Like

  118. 180
    Weak willed liberal says:

    anti surveillance: if you shake your face you come out blury

    Like

  119. 181

    Kate Garraway’s third tit exposed.

    Like

  120. 182
    Let's not beat about the bush says:

    Fat dishevelled mong molests person unknown.

    Like

  121. 183
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Derek and his lovely wife Kate Garroway smooching the night away.

    Like

  122. 186
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Dolly, “They say so many people die because of alcohol . . . perhaps they don’t realise how many of us are born because of it.”

    Like

  123. 187
    the last quango in paris says:

    I thought vertical stripes were meant to be slimming?

    Like

  124. 189
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Dolly [In vino veritas] : “I was fucking my secretary up the arse when Kate walked in. She said, “You can’t do this to me!” I said, “I know… that’s why I’m doing it to her.”

    Like

  125. 191
    Zorba the Geek says:

    Du yah know if that Guido Git comes in here I’m gonna shove a bottle of Glenfiddich up his arse!

    Like

  126. 192
    Alfie says:

    Blurred today. Gone tomorrow.

    Like

  127. 193
    Alfie says:

    OR: A labour of love.

    Like

  128. 194
    annomymous says:

    Is it them out of Dumber & Bummer,….* Ben Doone & Phil Mc Kracken*

    Like

  129. 195
    annomymous says:

    Well is Big Fat Tipsy Wedding…..(.du’no then)

    Like

  130. 196
    Molly says:

    The picture photoshop was designed for…

    Like

  131. 197
    smoggie says:

    Labour isn’t Wanking.

    Like

  132. 198
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Dolly: “You know you’re fat when no one mentions you’re a northern, Labour voting tosser.”

    Like

  133. 199
    Frank Kerr says:

    “mate- did you read about that Scots couple in Florida- hic- well let me phone Kate to see if she can get down here- hic – geddit- down here- I’m here all week”

    Like

  134. 200
    Keith Dovkunts says:

    Dolly: “I’m so drunk, I’m pissing tequila.”

    Kev: “I’m not falling for that one again . . .”

    Like

  135. 203
    Non-socialist worker says:

    Bloke on left: So what exactly did you used to do for Gordon Brown?
    DD: Just pull your pants down and I’ll show you

    Like

  136. 204
    Gone fishin' says:

    So I sed to Gordon “Yerra a sweaty sock anna wuneyed wan ker”. What did he say back? I’ll tell yer – he sedd “Dolly. You shoulda bin in Thunderbirds cos I can see yar bloody strings!”. Mind you that’s wot Anton sed azwell. Didn’t mek me larf unles they ment me vest. They should see a proppa headshrinkk or joke writa.
    By the way, It’s yor round.
    I luvv you.

    Like

  137. 205
    Displaced Brummie says:

    “Oh, my God! Either he’s got a gun in his pocket and he wants to shoot me… or he has a HUGE erection! Oh, god! Shoot me, please! Shoot me!”

    Like

  138. 206
    Billy Bowden, knobjockey in residence and regular pain in the arse says:

    I’m feeling a little quееr.

    Like

  139. 208
    Shh ! Pollysgon ! says:

    ‘Ere Wally – gesssh wot – hive jushgivn pollyone – shesed ssshe wuz pissht but v-v-veri v-v-verri, v-v-Verri, v-v-verri, v-v-verri gwratefool; ushud givitwun – shees in’t bar under our Ed

    Like

  140. 209
    Gordon Beige says:

    Dolly says to smearface, ‘Well, since Kate had the baby, she’s completely gone off sex…’

    Like

  141. 210
    ButcombeMan says:

    “Shall we take the William Hague suite?”

    Like

  142. 211
    Ghillie says:

    Help – I’m being Draped

    Like

  143. 214
    RJC says:

    ‘Did I tell you about his wife..?’

    Like

  144. 217
    Kered Ybretsae says:

    ‘I ’m a pissed arse Bullshitter myself, but I like to hear a professional at it. So please continue!!’

    Like

  145. 218
    Jeffrey Bernard says:

    Sing, Sing and slip on the ring

    Like

  146. 219
    Stepney says:

    The cockney definition of a Berkeley Hunt.

    Like

  147. 221
    annomymous says:

    “Soo Wee”.. Duelling Bandits?

    Like

  148. 222
    Lizzie says:

    Draper by name …

    Like

  149. 223
    Stu says:

    “Well Hello, Dolly,
    It’s so nice to have you back where you belong
    You’re looking swell, Dolly,
    We can tell, Dolly,
    You’re still glowin’, you’re still crowin’
    You’re still goin’ strong.
    We feel the room swayin’
    For the band’s playin’
    One of your old fav’rite songs from ‘way back when, so…”
    Promise you’ll never go away again.

    Say no more. Did anyone think that useless turd had actually gone away.

    Like

  150. 224
    Anonymous says:

    Garraway should have gone to spec savers…
    The fat twat

    Like

  151. 225
    Anonymous says:

    Spot the lardarse

    Like

  152. 226
    Let One Go says:

    Always looking forward to having brown on the end.

    Like

  153. 227
    Bob Dylan says:

    ‘There’s something of the night’ with Derek…but then he likes to get up (..Kate?) at Daybreak! And furthermore, stop butchering my music, Draper-it should only be me who sounds as though someone has swallowed a pack of razorblades!!!

    Like

  154. 228
    Issy Troughing MP says:

    Dolly off his Bolly Trolley

    Like

  155. 229
    Maverick Ways says:

    Never accept Dolly Mixtures from strangers. Never accept strange mixtures from Dolly.

    Like

  156. 230
    Old Blue Eyes says:

    Good Golly Miss Molly doesn’t Dolly look like Polly.
    By the way an anagram of Dolly Draper – “Old Lardy Rep”

    Like

  157. 233
    Aelfric says:

    Inside every fat fucking socialist are two thin fucking socialists trying to get out and spend their gyros.

    Like

  158. 234
    Bertie Woofter.... says:

    “Seems like a nice boy….I give him one up right up his *se later
    as he’s given me a throbbing big corn on the cobb”

    Like

  159. 236
    John McEnroe's lovechild says:

    I don’t know what that fat fucker thinks he’s doing but he needs to get his fat greasy mitts off my dad!

    Like

  160. 237
    annomymous says:

    PRESSing the flesh.

    Like

  161. 238
    annomymous says:

    you should not cultivate round your face , what you freely cultivate round ones arse

    Like

  162. 239
    selfimportant says:

    who the fuck are these people?

    Like

  163. 240
    smell the glove says:

    Dolly looking for a pink pounding

    Like

  164. 241
    rabid hamster says:

    Labour lists to the right

    Like

  165. 242
    An ITV newsreader says:

    And, then there was the time that I shafted Gordon Brown, after Tony had finished with him, that is.

    Like

  166. 243
    annomymous says:

    Guido, …Mi Mam se’z, are you coming round to put your Tent Pole up in her Garden????

    Like

  167. 244

    The stripes on my shirt used to be thin and close together like yours.

    Like

  168. 246
    annomymous says:

    I woke up ,with my Pant’s on Back to front

    Like

  169. 247
    Martha says:

    Dolly with a wally.

    Like

  170. 248
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    Taxi driver terminology.

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making an illegal u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – They don’t know what they’re doing
    If you want to make the airport, I’ll have to Huhne it. – I shall exceed the speed limit.I will require a bribe.
    Get a move on – Its Lucas! Are you a bit Gordon? – Please proceed. The traffic lights are green. Is your vision impaired?
    All Ken’s are C’unts I am not an admirer of either Ken Livingstone or Kenneth Clarke.
    Hello..looks like Boris got here first. – I can see a pregnant lady

    Vocabulary

    A Mini-Cooper – A ladyboy
    An Eddie – Traffic Warden
    A Shoesmith – A nice tip
    A Tom Watson – A prostitute
    A Tether – A pointless diversion
    A HOC – An expense.. commonly used with the adj Prezza. As in “That meal was Prezza. {enourmous}. I”d need a HOC to pay for it {it was expensive. I wish the taxpayer would pay for it.}

    Like

  171. 249
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    Taxi driver terminology.

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making a u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – He doesn’t know what he’s doing
    If you want to make the airport, I’ll have to Huhne it. – I shall exceed the spe’ed limit.I will require a bribe.
    Get a move on – Its Lucas! Are you a bit Gordon? – Please proce’ed. The traffic lights are green. Is your vision impaired?
    All Ken’s are C’unts .. I am not an admirer of either Ken Livingstone or Kenneth Clarke.
    Hello..looks like Boris got here first. – I can see a preg’nant lady

    Vocabulary

    A Mini-Cooper – A ladyboy
    An Eddie – Traffic Warden
    A Shoesmith – A nice tip
    A Tom Watson – A prostitute
    A Tether – A pointless diversion
    A HOC – An expense.. commonly used with the adj Prezza. As in “That meal was Prezza. {enourmous}. I”d need a HOC to pay for it {it was expensive. I wish the taxpayer would pay for it.}

    Like

  172. 250
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    Taxi driver terminology.

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making a u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – He doesn’t know what he’s doing
    If you want to make the airport, I’ll have to Huhne it. – I shall exc’e’ed the spe’ed limit.I will require a bribe.
    Get a move on – Its Lucas! Are you a bit Gordon? – Please proce’ed. The traffic lights are green. Is your vision impaired?
    All Ken’s are C’unts .. I am not an admirer of either Ken Livingstone or Kenneth Clarke.
    Hello..looks like Boris got here first. – I can see a preg’nant lady

    Vocabulary

    A Mini-Cooper – A ladyboy
    An Eddie – Traffic Warden
    A Shoesmith – A nice tip
    A Tom Watson – A prostitute
    A Tether – A pointless diversion
    A HOC – An expense.. commonly used with the adj Prezza. As in “That meal was Prezza. {enourmous}. I”d need a HOC to pay for it {it was expensive. I wish the taxpayer would pay for it.}

    Like

  173. 251
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    Taxi driver terminology.

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making a u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – He doesn’t know what he’s doing

    Like

  174. 252
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making a u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – He doesn’t know what he’s doing

    Like

  175. 253
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    ‘Learn BlackCab’

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making a u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – He doesn’t know what he’s doing

    Like

  176. 254
    Jane Pilgrim says:

    ‘Learn BlackCab’

    I need to do a ‘Dave’ – making a u-turn
    There’s no Vince down this way – I am unable to go right.
    Its a complete Miliband – He doesn’t know what he’s doing
    If you want to make the airport, I’ll have to Huhne it. – I shall exc’e’ed the spe’ed limit.I will require a bribe.
    Get a move on – Its Lucas! Are you a bit Gordon? – Please proce’ed. The traffic lights are green. Is your vision impaired?
    All Ken’s are C’unts .. I am not an admirer of either Ken Livingstone or Kenneth Clarke.
    Hello..looks like Boris got here first. – I can see a preg’nant lady

    Vocabulary

    A Mini-Cooper – A ladyboy
    An Eddie – Traffic Warden
    A Shoesmith – A nice tip
    A Tom Watson – A prostitute
    A Tether – A pointless diversion
    A HOC – An expense.. commonly used with the adj Prezza. As in “That meal was Prezza. {enourmous}. I”d need a HOC to pay for it {it was expensive. I wish the taxpayer would pay for it.}

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

Why We Need Change | Douglas Carswell
The Howard Roark of Westminster | Guardian
Carswell, the Clacton Cassandra | James Ford
Love Bomb Carswell | ConservativeHome
Denis MacShane’s Ex is Now Hacked Off Spokesman | Speccie
How the Carswell Story Unfolded | Sky News
How to Defect | Telegraph
Carswell Defection Will Dismay Thoughtful Tories | ConservativeHome
Carswell: Darling of the Tories, Labour and Now UKIP | Speccie
Where is the Love? | Tom Watson
Tory Eurosceptics Weakened | Speccie


VOTER-RECALL
Get the book Find out more about PLMR


Douglas Carswell’s side-kick Dan Hannan MEP pours water on the obvious question:

“I won’t be joining UKIP, though I wish Douglas Carswell all the best. He has been a superb MP, and it’s honourable to stand for re-election.”



Owen Jones says:

We also need Zil lanes.


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