October 19th, 2011

Defence Select Committee Expected to Move Against Hancock

There is all sorts of speculation doing the rounds that self-confessed “teen-fondler” and LibDem MP Mike Hancock is about to be suspended from the Defence Select Committee. Committee sources say nothing has happened yet, but others speculate that it can only be “a matter of time” before the Chairman James Arbuthnot has to act. The suspected spy that worked in Hancock’s office yesterday admitted to not only having a four-year affair with the MP, but to opening confidential mail and having access to Defence Select Committee documentation. She is fighting extradition and he is looking down the barrel of his career.

You have to wonder what first attracted the twenty-three year old leggy blonde to the bearded pensioner…

Having worked her way through a Dutch diplomat and NATO official, perhaps it was his massive, err, naval base in the constituency.


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Shame the cops are not tho.


  2. 2
    Tachybaptus says:

    She can’t have been attracted. Look at him. She was sent to his bed, to lie back and think of Mother Russia.


    • 15
      Handycock Russian Spy Shagger says:

      I cannot remember how many times I have visited Russia or other eastern european countries as ‘I lost my passport in the sea.’


    • 42
      MacGuffin says:

      The thought of that lovely young woman with that disgusting old man turns my stomach.


  3. 5
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I would just say that she did go beyond the call of duty and i hope she will be rewarded for it.


  4. 6
    Lescromps says:

    This fuckers my MP,no wonder he,s not answering my e-mails,shagging on the taxpayers coin all day,probably to knackered to do his job,his days must be numbered,nothing much in the local press though,yet


  5. 8
    Sir William Waad says:

    Many a good man has been brought low by an over-active pecker.


  6. 9
    Bloody paperwork says:

    He has probably pounded her arse hole into roubles.


  7. 10
    Willy's Away Day Bag Carrier says:

    So Berlusconi looks to have had his young ladies paid for by businessmen seeking information and influence, and that’s okay. Nothing more said – he’s some kind of god. Still.
    Handycock has his paid for by the Russian state, and you’re all over him. Does Guido prefer brunettes? (I do)
    Surely it’s time to consider a brothel allowance on the expenses for MPs to stop this happening in future.


    • 13
      Willy's Away Day Bag Carrier says:

      Oops, I mean I prefer balding men in baseball caps.


      • 23
        balti dodging catholic Mancunian says:

        I did not have sex with that man!
        t’otel trouser press were bust and the man was sat in me lap wriggling out t’ creases for me whnthe photographer burst in
        ‘ appen


    • 35
      Owlett says:

      Because it’s either the Russian state (which he admires) or the UK taxpayer’s pocket (whose society he hates). Neither of these put him in a good light. She, otoh, may be a dutiful patriot or, as likely, a Russki tart who likes a man -any man- who has money. His own or others’ it makes no difference.


  8. 12
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    If the Lib Dems had any integrity this seedy sex pest would be deselected.

    But they don’t so he won’t.


  9. 18
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Yeah but you would, though, wouldn’t you…?


  10. 19
    ex-Tory says:

    Are there any Lib Dem MPs that are not corrupt, piss-takers?


  11. 25
    kleegish says:

    I’m just chuffed about the whole thing; proves I wasn’t the only dumb ass who chucked it all away on some dodgy young girl who’s somehow connected to Russians. Han-crock may wish to consult me as to how to rehabilitate a reputation and career by scrubbing piss pots.
    /s/ John Profumo


  12. 26
    BillyBob... says:

    Get the f*cker locked up ?


  13. 27
    Bristol Boy says:

    Never mind about deporting Katya – why not deport Handycock along with her? Russia or Rumania would do nicely – the age of consent there is still very low.


  14. 28
    Spotty Lizard says:

    “She is fighting extradition and he is looking down the barrel of his career.”

    For Christ’s sake, Guido, you are illiterate. You mean “…his career is looking down the barrel”, you stupid fucker.


  15. 29
    Jolly Jack Tar says:

    “perhaps it was his massive, err, naval base in the constituency”

    Does this mean that Portsmouth is full of discharged seamen?


  16. 30
    Mikhal Hancockski says:

    Unbelievable. The perv is still in his job. As for that silly cow, her antics smack of desperation.


  17. 32
    davidc says:

    i thought she summed it all up when she pointed out that mr hancock holds no political appointment of consequence but is in fact only another backbench mp who, allegedly, cannot keep his prick in his trousers and whose only of value to his party is as lobby fodder


  18. 33
    Popeye says:

    Just look at him, it had to be for money, or orders from the Kremlin. Payback time for “Buster” Crabbe?
    Drum him out of Parliament, at worse, a traitor, at best a naive pervert.


  19. 37
    Gordon's Gin says:

    She looks nice. I would bed her if I could.


  20. 38
    Steve P says:

    Guido said “You have to wonder what first attracted the twenty-three year old leggy blonde to the bearded pensioner…”

    but I wondered “what first attracted the bearded pensioner to the twenty-three year old leggy blonde …”

    Incidentally if she was 23 he was not fondling “a teen”


  21. 43
    Ian says:

    So a LibDem politician is under suspicion of being a traitor to his own country.

    Given party policy on EU matters, they should ALL hang.


  22. 44
    MartinW says:

    This should be a far, far bigger story than the Fox affair, which the BBC has been pushing to the maximum possible degree.
    A Russian spy in bed (literally and metaphorically) with an MP on the Parliamentary Defence Select Committee, who clearly had access to DSC papers, and probably a lot of other documentation besides. What was on the Hancock’s laptop, for example? Why is the BBC not pursuing this with hte utmost vigour? Why does it not head all the News bulletins? The scandal is immense.


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