September 29th, 2011

Early Bird Top Tory Fringe Events

Courtesy of the service, based on users who have downloaded the free App or registered to receive free SMS text message reminders to attend events, we bring you the top 10 most popular fringe events:

#1 Winning Campaigns

#2 How The Conservatives Can Win The Next Election

#3 Cameron’s Candidates? Primaries, the A-list and the way forward

#4 The Official Conference Tweet-up

#5 Midnight Reception

#6 Beers of Europe

#7 The Andrew Neil Interview

#8 Class of 2010 – The Future of the Conservative Party

#9 Smarter Leaner, Better: The future of local public services

#10  Stand Up For Liberty! Drinks Reception

Go to and register for event reminders. Handily the App works even when you are in the conference zone and can’t get a phone signal. You can even find out which fringe events Guido and Neo-Guido will be attending here and here. If you were that way inclined you could search for which events have have free booze at the click of a button, technology is a wonderful thing…


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    FFS Beers of Europe?

  2. 2
    Chairman of The Bored says:

    No. 6 sounds quite interesting.

  3. 3
    Everard P Burgerpenis says:

    I’m off to that one !!

  4. 4
    Chairman of The Bored says:

    Call it a dead heat, Billy.

  5. 5
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Guido, You will be pleased to know that i will not be able to attend.

    However, can i wish you and Neo and fun time.

    Try and corner Hunt and Wiggin tho.

    Oh yeah, left you a link from Labourlist on last thread (In modland), They begging for 5k to help keep it going, yet they claim they are the 3rd most populor blog.

    Bad buisness model?

  6. 6
    sick of everything, ever says:

    They should combine #6 and #10.

  7. 7
    Billy Blofeld says:

    “RSPCA Beer & Curry night”

    There is nothing like a Road-Kill Vindaloo or a Stray Dog Madras to get a turgid conference going…………..

  8. 8
    Pardon me but ..... says:

    Why isnt there a fringe event called “How the fuck did we not win a majority over the worst government in bastarding history?”

  9. 9
    Steve Miliband says:

    see event # Fuck off Hattie, one person one vote.

  10. 10
    Anonymous says:

    They should do one on “How Conservatives can lose the next election” as they are on the right track of doing so. You have to give it to Cameron for not winning a majority in the last election.

  11. 11
    Afghanistan Banana Stand says:

    #2 should be easy.

    Give us a referendum on our EU membership.

    Of course if this just a tad too radical, then just ensure Labour keep their current gormless, vacant minded leader.

    I like the idea of #6 though – just so long as it’s ‘proper’ beers and not poncy European Lagers
    a.k.a. Belgian piss

  12. 12
    Anonymous says:

    What about kinky sex.

  13. 13
    AnotherAnon. says:

    Probably got the hand injury punching a wall,when refused entry to the labour kiddies disco?

  14. 14
    AnotherAnon. says:

  15. 15
    Chairman of The Bored says:

    OK. Your place or mine?

  16. 16
    Pi Keys R Toppe says:

    No mention of THE FRINGE EVENT Guido!

    How the Pi Kees overcame all resistance and shoved two fingers right up the ARse of Essex!

    (Clothed with our benefit payments and taxes of course, – idle fuckers!)

  17. 17
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    EllieCumbo profile

    EllieCumbo Now entering seventh hour of return journey from Liverpool. Bloke having interminable phone chat in front needs to stop, for his own safety. 8 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite

    The picture that goes with this tweet has a red rose in the corner, i hope this person is not threaterning anyone?

  18. 18
    Camertwat says:

    I wonder that too, – Mr Brown was a lunatic wasn’t he, – or did I get that wrong as well?

  19. 19
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    #Who let Nick Cleeg join the TV debates.

  20. 20
    The Thrid Way says:

    Camerhune just better not crow about what he’s achieved this year! – having failed to trash LieBore last.

    Stupid fucker – no, – make that IDIOT!

  21. 21

    Was it because foolish Dave said “We need to make cuts?”
    Nobody liked hearing that.

    Of course what he should have done was to say the same words, only in Brown’s language.

    “We need to invest in the future jobs for young-people’s nurses and hospitals cuddly bunny hardworkingfamilies fund. Have another £500 on your tax credits..Go on, all of deserve started in America..let them worry about it. Am I right Mr Papandreou ? Course I am!”

  22. 22
    Pi Keys R Toppe says:

    Not only clothed but fed and warmed by us too!

    Get the dozers in NOW!

  23. 23
    A mong e moss says:

    Are you going to post the same shit under different names all night or does your shift end soon?

  24. 24
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    The only way the Conservatives can lose the next election is to get RedEd and Blinky defenestrated.

  25. 25
    Ewanme says:

    Where is this piss up then , Guido , babes ??

    Ewa might shuffle along to it an introduce myself to yous .

    E x .

  26. 26
    Archer Karcher says:

    When socialists are not stealing other peoples money they are begging for it. Gimmee, gimmee, gimmee, it’s in their DNA.

  27. 27
    Gordons Brown says:

    I combine six and nine.


    That makes 22.

  28. 28
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Where is it anyway?

  29. 29
    AC1 says:

    One Answer. “The License Fee”

  30. 30
    Ewanme says:

    Oh , the irony !!

    E x .

  31. 31
    Rory the Anti-Tory says:

    Please take down that advert for Ipad.
    We’ve all already got one from our EMA money.

  32. 32
  33. 33
    Sir William Waad says:

    ‘Stand up for Liberty’? How did that make it to the modern Tory Party conference?

  34. 34
    Archer Karcher says:

    Lunatic he was and his cabinet a gang of looting, perverted, parasites. Unfortunately, the alternative was Call Me Dave and his wishy washy, happy clappy, EU hugging, SDPervative “alternative” choice.

  35. 35
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Hang on Guido

    You say you and young Neo will be attending, this is a home crowd for both of you, yet you let him go to the labour conference (enemey teritory) on his own.

    What did he do that was so bad that he was given that cruel and inhumaine punshment?

  36. 36
    Archer Karcher says:

    Shouldn’t these people be out watching 8 year olds cage fighting?

  37. 37
    The Paragnostic says:

    Defenestration of those two?

    We haven’t got a building tall enough for that…

  38. 38
    Afghanistan Banana Stand says:

    No. 2 should be easy.

    Give us a referendum on our EU membership.

    Of course if this just a tad too radical, then just ensure Labour keep their current gormless, vacant minded l.e.ader.

    I like the idea of No.6 though – just so long as it’s proper beer and not poncy European Lager
    a.k.a. Belgian piss

  39. 39
    The Paragnostic says:

    Is Dog’s Bollocks beer on tap?

  40. 40
    The Paragnostic says:

    If it wasn’t Basildon, I’d feel some sympathy :-)

  41. 41
    The Paragnostic says:

    Dunno, WW, but Shami Chakrabati gives me wood…

  42. 42
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    they dont call it Baisldump for nowt.

  43. 43
    Derek Idle says:

    It’s at Manchester Central Conference Centre, Windmill St, Manchester, Ewanme.

  44. 44
    Rory Weal says:

    I’ll be at Stamford Bridge. I can’t afford stationary for school and I hear Chelsea give away pens.

  45. 45
    Ewanme says:

    Oh , right . Cheers for that Derek , sweetheart x .

    Can normal humans jus go along an heckle etc. or does you need a invite ??

    E x .

  46. 46
  47. 47
    Chris Bryant says:

    Here, try my pens.

  48. 48
    The Cabinet Secretary says:

    It’s being run by Walt Disney.

  49. 49
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    What are the Odds that no blogging will be done by Guido and Neo during conference and what odds for our esteamed host and sidekick being permantly pissed all the thro the conference?

  50. 50
    Osborne says:

    How much with coke?

  51. 51
    Anonymous says:

    Tonight’s YouGov/Sun poll has topline figures of CON 37%, LAB 43%, LDEM 8%.

  52. 52
    Rem says:

    What’s shagger Caroline Nokes up to these days, is she still parting her legs for conference?

  53. 53
  54. 54
    FEELIN BLUE says:

    Billy, the conservatives are certainly NOT a home crowd in my book.

  55. 55
    nell says:

    I like the sound of ‘Stand up for liberty drinks reception’

    Does this mesan this year, given what champagne socialists our labour lot have become, that the tory conference is going to allow champagne to be served?

  56. 56
    Anonymous says:

    Going back to your country on a holiday?

  57. 57
    freaks, cocks and elephant men says:

    I think you’ll fit in fine.

  58. 58
    nell says:

    Well guido and neo guido seem to have remained relatively sober through the labour conference despite the inebriated state of some of the labour mp’s present, so don’t see why they shouldn’t manage to remain similarly sober for the tory one.

  59. 59
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Guido didnt go to the labour Con, He sent Neo in all on his own.

    Poor lad…..

  60. 60
    Derek Idle says:

    That, I am not sure about. Seeing as “we are all in this together” I would roll up and dazzle the security staff with your feminine charms, if I were you. You may not get into conference but there is bound to be plenty of bottom-feeders lurking in the vicinity. Who knows? You may find Kay Burley lying in some backstreet gutter. If you do make it to Manchester, have fun. If not, flick popcorn at your screen along with the rest of us. We are all in this together.

  61. 61
    root vegetable says:

    At your age nell, I bet you go for anything that stands up.

  62. 62
    strap me! says:

    He’s had more lezza cock than you’ve had meat and two veg Billy.

  63. 63
    Ranter says:

    Things move too fast these days for Conservatism. The problem is what are the conservatives trying to conserve. By the time they have decided things have changed and what they wanted to conserve isn’t there any more. Conservatism isn’t quick enough or dynamic enough to conserve much more than their name. Perhaps it’s the name and its history that need to be looked at.

    I would have liked to conserve England as it was when I grew up. Then the population of London was as near to being 100% English as makes no difference. Now one third of the population of London wasn’t even born in the UK. So what’s to conserve if the change is happening at a faster rate than you can tie down what it is you are trying to conserve?

    Time to think quickly about things before they change and come up with a fit for purpose objective that will last more than a few minutes.

    Computers are obsolete as soon as you unpack them and turn them on. Politics is much the same…

  64. 64
    Craig Somebody says:

    a) That would be interesting.

    b) That would be interesting.

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    That is one hell of a chat up line, bitch.

    Sorry, that should have said, “that is one hell of a crappy chat up line….”


  66. 66
    Steve Jobby says:

    Too right. My 2 gig memory and 320 gig hard drive is looking somewhat anemic.

  67. 67
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    CommentatorIntl profile

    CommentatorIntl Sources say one Guardian columnist has told colleagues not to respond to this piece,coz they’re chicken shit scared: 8 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite

  68. 68
    Jabba the Cat says:

  69. 69
    don't stand so, don't stand so, don't stand so close to me says:

    I would tbh.

  70. 70
    Derek Idle says:

    I’ll have you know that slight variations of that line resulted in four Mrs. Idles and seventeen miniature Idles.

  71. 71
    Steve Jobby says:

    I’m sure I bothered to post a comment here somewhere.

  72. 72
    ewanme are finished babe says:

    Over to you, Ewanme, looks like you’ve pulled.

  73. 73
    Ewanme says:

    Who cares , honey ??

    Wot’s occurrin on the DT ??

    E x .

  74. 74
    any old iron says:

    Oh the irony!

  75. 75
    WTF? says:

    You’ve surpassed yourself with this one Billy.

  76. 76
    Martin Day says:

    Britain has pledged to veto a £40billion ‘transaction tax’ on the City that the EU is planning as a means to make firms repay their debts after receiving huge state support.

    Read more:

  77. 77
  78. 78
    Mikey Smithson says:

    I was at the supermarket the other day. As the cashier was scanning our items she asked if I would like a “bag for life”
    “No thanks. Already got one” I said pointing at the wife.

  79. 79
    Anonymous says:

    This is a cryptic clue for tomorrows times crossword, right?

  80. 80
    Well? says:

    So they have not been convicted yet or found guilty?

  81. 81
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    A result of 13 years of Labour education policy, Your mum must be so proud.

  82. 82
    Hugh Mann-Wright says:

    Remember their human rights first.

  83. 83
    Martin Day says:

    Just had word from a co-conspiritor that the music to be played when David”Fatty” Cameron enters conference to make his “speech” will be “Seven Drunken Nights” by The Dubliners.

    You just couldn’t make it up !!!!!

  84. 84
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    The right to afair trail?

    Innocent until found Guilty?

    Fucking right.

  85. 85
    Anonymous says:

    Don’t worry, the answer has just come to me…….utter billy bollocks.

  86. 86
    Education, edyercashun, edgyercayshunn says:

    It’s stationEry, Rory.

    That private school education and your current Grammar School haven’t taught you how to spell.

  87. 87
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Took you that long?

    And it wasnt even funny…….

    come back Jimmy all is forgivern.

  88. 88
    so many pseudonyms, so little to say says:

    I’d do it.

  89. 89
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    CommentatorIntl profile

    CommentatorIntl Spread far and wide: @leftfootfwd @thefabians ran away from this, destroying them (despite right to reply offer): 58 seconds ago · reply · retweet · favorite

    I think someone has upset the Fabians……….

  90. 90
    Lies followed by lies = lies says:

    Unless they do something about rusty the plastic bag warmonger, number 8 should be blue labour is the future and the Conservatives will be like old Labour dead and buried when we get another vote.

  91. 91
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Hang on, Is this split in the Labour party?

    Only the other day Sally Bercow was saying it was good as less wepons?

    Are they trying to face both ways on the same subject?

  92. 92
    Anonymous says:

    Who the fuck is Jimmy, knobhead?

  93. 93
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    So all you can do is chuck abuse?

    Maybe you should go back to the Guardian, i hear they like that type of thing.

  94. 94
    so many pseudonyms, so little to say says:

    you’ve said it

  95. 95
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Ed Miliband has got sand in his shoes.

  96. 96
    Anonymous says:

    That’s not abuse it’s a fucking question you twat.

  97. 97
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    I would just like to say that, important as political conferences are, there are more important things in the world going on, like the situation between Armenia and Azerbaijaj, over Nagorno Karabach. I don’t kmow what it is all about, but I am considered very important out there as you can see.

    I am quite willing to get involved and play one side off against the other, so long as they each keep providing me with young girls.

  98. 98
    Anonymous says:

    Sod off Camerhoon, this is a Tory site.

  99. 99
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    All you do is insult people here, even when they do answer your post (copy and pasted), I would suggest growing up or at least going to a place that suits your mentallty ( The Guardian, Left Foot Forward etc).

  100. 100
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Shackels morelike it, from Charlie Whealen and co….

  101. 101
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    The site might have a right leaning bias, but that does not mean all that post here are right leaning.

  102. 102
    Anonymous says:

    oh do fuck off Billy, you’re fucking pissed again and overdosing on amyl nitrate.

  103. 103
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I see the Labour comrades have got back home to thier PCs and I-pads.

    How many workers have been drinking Champayne lately?

  104. 104
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    I need to add that the Azerbaijani’s are winning the argument at present with me. Their 16 year old girls are stunningly beautiful.

  105. 105
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    you will get a girlfriend/boyfriend one day, all you have to do is grow up.

    Learn to deabte with a bit of civilty, most here hate whatever government is in power.

    Once you move into the real world (Private sector and taxpayer) you will understand.

  106. 106
    Anonymous says:

    Yeah, we all know which way you lean Billy.

  107. 107
    Steve Miliband says:

    that was last night. Tonight;
    Sun_Politics Sun Politics
    Sun/YouGov poll tonight: Labour’s lead still only 3 points – CON 38%, LAB 41%, LDEM 9%. No conference bounce then for Ed Miliband either.

  108. 108
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Great to see intolorance from the left.

    It brings joy to my heart :-)

  109. 109
    Gruber says:

    Political Betting not very keen on Ed’s conference.

    The worst in living memory.

  110. 110
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    @ Steve

    Is that not within the margin of error?

  111. 111
    Anonymous says:

    Fuck off and do one.

  112. 112
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    jreedmp Which lame celebs will be getting lined up to wax lyrical about the Tories next week? Anyone any good or just Jim Davidson and Busted? 2 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite

    Jim Davidson?
    Is this MP trying to say the Tories are racist?

  113. 113
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I rest my case.

  114. 114
    Anonymous says:

    The Guilty Idiots

  115. 115
    Ambrose Seatbelt Fishponds says:

    Do please just fuck off TAT.

    You start the moment you get on the bus home from work and don’t stop until the ten minute freeview on the porn channel comes on.

    Everyone knows its you. You’re like a toddler hiding behind the same curtain over and over again.

    Get a new act. Because you’re not provocative, or misleading, or planing deep mind game, false flag, propaganda operations.

    You’re boring.
    Boring, boring, boring.

  116. 116
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Labour and the unions are built on sand. Makes me wonder if the unions will get a shock when they try to get the rank and file to strike.

  117. 117
  118. 118
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I am wondering whether they want a refund, after Ed is only there because of them?

  119. 119
    Anonymous says:

    Yeah, a nut case/

  120. 120
    Anonymous says:

    Can’t be repeated often enough in my view.

  121. 121
    Anonymous says:

    Actually I’m on the far right and want to hang you by the bollocks.

  122. 122
    Classist says:

    Should I feel guilty for having contempt for commoners? I loathe chavvy thick uneducated working class commoners.

  123. 123
    Historian says:

    Guido for Leader of the Tory party I say

    Enough of this weak inconsequential bunch of False Tories

    Who are even behind the weirdo Milliband and his Shadow cabinet of hoons in the polls…

    Really…Timem for a change please

  124. 124
    Fourth time lucky says:

    How come the Eurozone is almost a complete ressemblance of Germany’s Third Reich?

  125. 125
    so many pseudonyms, so little to say says:

    FFS. We got the message you dimwit.

  126. 126
    Jack says:


    If you can’t win an Election against the psycho Brown and you are led by Milliweirdo in the polls, there must be something very badly wrong

  127. 127
    Classist says:

    Tonight’s Question Time panel: Tim Farron, Caroline Flint, Grant Shapps, Janet Street Porter. Fairly crap but Shapps is a good speaker and can hold his own. He’ll destroy Flint.

  128. 128
    Adolph says:

    Because we defeated them all

    But now we are having to bail them all out….

    For our sins…

  129. 129
    Anonymous says:

    Fuck off Mandy

  130. 130
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Shamrock Rovers 1- spurs 0

    Come on Shamrock!!!!!

  131. 131
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    No, Your intolorenc eof others show a far-left streak, some may say Nazi-like.

  132. 132
    Paddy watch says:

    And don’t forget that Ireland has supported both European unelected tyrants.

    When Osborne says that Ireland is our bestest friend he forgets how Ireland supported Germany in the war and now supports Germany in the peace.

    But the heir to baronetcy of Ballentaylor, in County Tipperary, and Ballylemon, in County Waterford would.

  133. 133
  134. 134
    HRH Duke of Edinburgh says:

    When is this Freemason, Pervert and Spy going to be arrested? This country has gone to the dogs. It is obvious to everyone that he has been subborned by Russia, probably on the basis of sexual blackmail, and yet it still carries on. He has neither the education nor intelligence to pontificate about anything, let alone foreign policy in Asia. His fellow European MP’s on the Council of Europe have been complaining about his irrational pro Russian sympathies and sexual proclivities for years, and yet still it carries on. When are the Government going to do something about him?

  135. 135
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Shamrock Rovers 1- 2 Spurs

    Oh well, it was fun for a few mins.

  136. 136
    Oh Guido says:

    what you playing at?

  137. 137
    troll fucker says:

    It’ll probably have to be repeated ad nauseum to penetrate that thick fucking skull of yours.

  138. 138
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:


    Game , set, match.

  139. 139
    jgm2 says:

    Yes. That’s the one. Tony Blair was 10 points or more ahead in the polls back in 1997. Every PMQ he was kicking the pants out of Major. But he wasn’t stupid enough to risk all that on a ‘Winner Gets All’ TV debate. You’re home free. You can only lose from here. Major was the one calling for the TV debate. Brown was the one calling for the TV debate. Did it not occur to him what could go wrong?

    Cameron on the other hand was/is that stupid.

    The rest, as they say, is history.

  140. 140
    Anonymous says:

    “No, Your intolorenc eof others show a far-left streak, some may say Nazi-like.”

    Billy you’ve just invoked Godwins Law like the whiny little loser that you are. Now fuck off.

  141. 141
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    TV deabtes?

    The mistake was two fold.

    1: Climb down on referendum on Lisbon after it had been ratified.

    2: Inviteing Nick Clegg to take part in debates.

  142. 142
    Jimmy says:

    Way Forward is holding a Night Rally? What fun!

  143. 143
    jgm2 says:

    Why? Is Liberty pregnant or disabled?

  144. 144
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Your Blog Anon?

  145. 145
    Anonymous says:

    I just find it mind blowing. In the late fifties and then on into the sixties (from my own personal experience) we could openly laugh and joke about the Nazis and also get away with Jewish jokes. Now this was the time when my parents and elders had been through the war and experienced 1st hand Nazi Germany and the horrors of war.

    Then suddenly in 2011 we are verboten to mention the war, have a laugh or side with the Jews’s ill treatment. By people or a European government who have no connection with that time.

  146. 146
    Ewanme says:

    *Slight giggle*

    Some human from here used that line on me once , so many pseudonyms, so little to say , darlin xx .

    Jus ignore it . I does .

    They churns words out into the ether coz they ain’t got nothin better to do , hun .

    They messes wiv space-time so’s one of their own pops up first on evry “topic” .

    They engages their bonce for a milisecond an then posts it as “commeny of the day” .

    They pours over a piccy for 3 days an then does a “Craption Competition” .

    They moderate to fuck , darlin .

    They hates to be shown up .

    They doesn’t like loose canons .

    They is hypocrites , sweetheart .

    They talks right but are exactly wot the left is .

    They is BULLSHITTERS .

    *Waves to Billy*

    E x .

    P.S. I ain’t no leftie , thank fuck . Grow a couple , H*rry , you sensitive soul or do somethin else .

    PPS. How comes your blog died , then ??

  147. 147
    Anonymous says:

    I am just fed up with the censorship here. Anything gutter goes but cutting edge is banned.

  148. 148
    Buzz Ted says:

    Would a genuine classist feel guilt ???

    Sir, you are a Marxist Miliband mountebank, maliciously making mischief.

  149. 149
    jgm2 says:

    It is an interesting question. Women are attracted to power and money and yet this fucker seems to be in a love triangle with the ugly sisters. So either he has no power. Or no money. Or these two are a tag-team of ugliness keeping him away from the sunny uplands of tottyville.

    Mate – you need to hire prettier secretaries.

  150. 150
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    Lebensraum and all, eh as the EU expands exponentially ??

  151. 151

    You are aware of the refund policy?

  152. 152
    Anonymous says:

    Oh yeah? What happened to, “I may not agree with what you say, but I’ll defend to the death your right to say it.”

    You’re a fucking hypocrite Bowden.

  153. 153
    jgm2 says:

    An unusually erudite contribution.

    Fair point. Well made.

  154. 154
    Spartacus says:

    Good series of Instrumental CDs though

  155. 155
    jgm2 says:

    Shit-for-brains more like.

  156. 156
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Not at all.

    ” I despise what you say but will defend to the death your right to say it”

    I am not the one telling posters to “Fuck off” or ” Do one”

    This is not my blog as it is not yours.

    you should be thankful for having a platform to project you intolorance.

  157. 157
    Angela says:

    You see, where Adolf went wrong was to invade by force. Writing a Cheque is far easier and it works.

  158. 158
    CE 11+ Scholarship examiner says:

    Alliteration. (2 marks).

  159. 159
    jgm2 says:

    3. Agreeing to have them in the first place. Tony Blair didn’t and he was miles ahead in the polls.

  160. 160
    Herpes says:

    Poetry in motion.

  161. 161
    Chumbly says:

    Over there, you purblind twat.

  162. 162
    Anonymous says:

    I am grateful. Now fuck off.

  163. 163
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    i agree to a degree.

    The problem was labour were so shit and the left (BBC/Guardian) Needed to pick a winner.

  164. 164
    Anonymous says:

    Yes I am :) and on the whole a refund is never required as you run an excellent blog. But when one spends some time and effort typing a reply only to find it goes into the sin bin it can be more than a tad frustrating.

  165. 165
    Chumbly says:

    Simple — he’s an ugly bleeder himself. Mind you, his Mrs looks like something off 419Eaters.

  166. 166
    jgm2 says:

    And you’re not.

    Get over it. I don’t look like George Clooney but I don’t go around trying to chuck acid in his face. To ‘even’ things up.

  167. 167
    Chumbly says:

    A 2-bagger.

  168. 168
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    And again, i rest my case, you been shown to be two faced and inconsistant.

    I will not respond to any more of your nazi like/fabian inspired eugenics comments.

    I just hope you grow out of it soon.

  169. 169
    Chumbly says:

    Breathing is the only qualification. Iron lung OK. Pulse optional.

  170. 170
    to billy says:


  171. 171
    jgm2 says:

    ‘Ugly bleeder’ doesn’t come into it. John ‘I can’t see my cock or my feet’ Prescott was getting it on a plate.

    Women, God love them, are attracted to whatever is going to launch their DNA into prosperity. Rich men. Powerful men. The fact that they look like Bernie Ecclestone or Peter Crouch or John Prescott or Prince Charles doesn’t come into it. They’d fuck a gorilla if they thought they’d get a palace and a Lear Jet out of the gig.

  172. 172
    Anonymous says:

    Piss off simpleton.

  173. 173
    Chumbly says:

    Equally valid argument can be made about Labour. (J. Daley in the Crappygraph posted something to this effect, but I have thought this for years.) Labour’s vote comprises people who don’t work or who work for the state, which is tantamount to the same thing. The remnants of the working class have become aspirational and will vote Tory like as not, if they bother to vote at all.

    The old division between labour and capital has become blurred, mainly because of state intervention, so neither of the main parties stands for the people it’s supposed to stand for. As for the Limp Dumbs, they’re just as much a joke as UKIP. In fact Conservatives and Labour are completely interchangeable, Tweedledum and Tweedledee, incompetent, impotent arseholes who fiddle around at the edges of what’s left after the European Commission has told them what to do.

    What we’ll need when the euro collapses is a dictatorship, with me in charge.

    Yes, that’ll do it. I’m warming to the idea.

  174. 174
    Chumbly says:

    That was my joke, you bastard, c. 2008. I made it up, really I did!

  175. 175
    Charterhouse entrance examiner says:

    Three question-marks — deduct 1.

  176. 176
    jgm2 says:

    Use a unique name. That way your comments show up as ‘awaiting moderation’. Then, if you realise the trigger word that might have caused it you can stick in a few **** in to break it up and re-post.

    Works in Firefox.

  177. 177
    Poker Bum says:

    Time of the month, Ewanme?

  178. 178
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    politicshomeuk profile

    politicshomeuk Tomorrow’s Daily Telegraph front page: Brussels sues UK to let in ‘benefits tourists’ 2 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite

  179. 179
    Chumbly says:

    Crawling never gets you anywhere.

    No doubt your IP address has gone on file and all your future posts will be consigned to electronic oblivion.

  180. 180
    blogger of the year says:

    Too right Ewanme, H*rry has got his favourites, and he fucking hates me that’s for sure, so I must be something right.

  181. 181
    jgm2 says:

    A bit like me at ‘Comment is Free’.

  182. 182
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Beers of Europe, you can tell it’s the Tories.

  183. 183
    Lies followed by lies = lies says:

    Whats up chuckles a bit too close to the bone,little one.

  184. 184
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Might have known Guido would be interested in the beers :)

  185. 185
  186. 186
    Anonymous says:

    We have to repeat it ad nauseum to penetrate your thick fucking skull.

  187. 187
    jgm2 says:

    Stop reading ‘The Daily Mail’. It is designed to make your blood pressure blow a gasket. Just as the Gruanaid or Mirror is designed to make the bedwetters blow their tubes.

    Reality is hard enough on the BP without those c*unts stoking the pressure.

  188. 188
    jgm2 says:

    Surely that would be De Beers of Europe.

  189. 189
    Anonymous says:

    we only do pepsi

  190. 190
    jgm2 says:

    Your new word for today is ‘gamine’.

  191. 191
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I aint blowing a gasket (not blowing anything), Just dont think its right, it reminds of Mohammad and a 7/9 year old girl.

    How can a 8/11 year old know what they want ( gender wise) ?

    Maybe 18, but 8/11?

  192. 192
    Refound Foundered says:

    Al-Beeba/Liebour Divorce on the cards!!
    Embarrasing Ed and his minions – a no show on BBC’s ‘flagship’ Ten O’Clock News.
    No clips of the Red Flag and composites with the komrade bretheren.
    BBC embarrassed by their liebour cousins, anyone mention a leper colony sprung up in Liverpool!!!


  193. 193
    jgm2 says:

    Sorry Bowden. It’s The Mail. I only read it once in the last twenty odd years – at my wife’s bestest pal’s parent’s house – last year – and it was quite obvious that they’re trying to kill their readers by raising their blood to boiling point.

    It is the right-wing equivalent of the Gruaniad or the Mirror and hasn’t even got a toe dipped in neutrality or fair coverage.

    The proprietor is trying to kill you. It’s like the NHS only more overt. They must be a Labour front organisation. Trying to kill reactionary old folk through high blood pressure before they can vote one more time.

    That said, by the same logic, the Gruanaid and Mirror must be owned by the T*ries.

  194. 194
    Janet Street Walker says:

    Caroline Flint, ‘ female window dressing’ ?? Do me a favour !!!

  195. 195
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Good post by OH.

  196. 196
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    No worries, I look at the message and not the messanger.

    Or play the ball and not the bowler :-)

  197. 197
    Cutie says:

    Hilarious so far. No plants whatsoever.

  198. 198
    jgm2 says:

    No. It’s the BBC doing Ned the biggest favour they can. Keeping him away from the voters attention.

    Just as very few people were aware of the weirdness of Brown until he became PM so Ned’s best strategy is to try and remain anonymous for the next four years and hope to produce a well-run election campaign with topless girls and fast cars in 2015 distracting attention from his ‘Wallace off Wallace and Grommit’ caricature fuckwittery.

  199. 199
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “hope to produce a well-run election campaign with topless girls ”

    Harriet will not allow it, Mrs Dromey wont either.

  200. 200
    Cutie says:

    Fascinating read.

  201. 201
    jgm2 says:

    Yeah. More a female blackout blind.

  202. 202
    jgm2 says:

    Harriet’s voting record shows that she would do pole-dancing on Top Gear if it would keep her a day longer in the Labour Party.

  203. 203
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    The longer she stays in the Labour party (and front bench) the more harm she does to Labour, Top Gear is BBC programe( or was , havent watched in years) so the pole dancing would be payed by the lisence fee payer?

    Is it worth it?

  204. 204
    Paddy Powder says:

    Did O’Borne get a tutu in PPE at Keele?

  205. 205
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    marxistpoet Why is it that everyone luckily forgets that WE DID HAVE A REFERENDUM ON THE EUROPE@N UNION. It’s a vacuous, non-argument. about 1 minute ago · reply · retweet · favorite

    In that case this twitter is arguing for no more elections?

  206. 206
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Had to change the A to beat Mod.

  207. 207
    The Paragnostic says:

    Lol jgm – you’d have thought that Boy Cooper would do the job, but I’m afraid Testicules has that particular furrow all to himself when it’s plouhing season…

  208. 208
    Paddy Powder says:

    Well said from the Northener.

  209. 209
    200th ? says:


  210. 210
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    I wish that the electorate hadn’t voted for that Barosso, he seems an evil fu cker.

    I seem to have forgoten when he was elected, when is he up for election again?

    It’s a good thing the EUSS R is a real democracy or he might be there for ever.

  211. 211
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    doubt it, few comments awaiting modding.

  212. 212
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    marxistpoet profile

    marxistpoet I’ve actually stopped watching #BBCQT properly. Too busy being angry at Thatcher. 30 seconds ago · reply · retweet · favorite

  213. 213
    I can smell Caroline Flint's front bottom from here says:

    She don’t half go on. Does she live in a static mobile home?

  214. 214
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:


    @ Moniker.

  215. 215
    Traditionalist says:

    Thumbs up.

  216. 216
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    And now the games begin, i wonder how the shareholders at Trintery Mirror Group will go?

  217. 217
    Thatcher still gets 'em going says:

    The Question Time audience reaction to Peter Oborne mentioning Thatcher was hilariously predictable.

  218. 218
    I can smell Caroline Flint's front bottom from here says:

    The early eighties were, necessarily, grim. Were you there?

  219. 219
    nowotimeen says:

    It’s mad, mad, muslim world.

    Drs and nurses in Bahrain have been sentenced to up to 15 years in prison if they treated people who were injured by Bahrain police or Saudia Arabian soldiers while protesting for their freedom.

    Piss in the face of the next Islamofacist who tells you Islam is a religion of peace.

  220. 220
    Thatcher still gets 'em going says:

    Yeah. I was eight, I think.

  221. 221
    nowotimeen says:

    All Cameron has to do next time is to fulfill his promise of a referendum on the UK staying in the EU. If he does, he will win.

  222. 222
    everyone at the bbc says:

    coke and gay sex?

  223. 223
    3 leopards on the shirt says:

    Billy is right anonymong, you’ve blown it. No one likes your sort.

  224. 224
    Admiral Lord Nelson's Ghost says:

    This man epitomises everything that has gone wrong and is wrong with this country.

  225. 225
    Margaret Thatcher says:

    Lock him up and throw away the key.

  226. 226
    not a machine says:

    I like Peter Obourne , read most of his outputs , however him being a bit of an intellectual I am not too sure he hasnt been quietly hooked by Eds conference speech , did ed really redefine politics ? was his speech really one of those so called 30yr overarching visonary moments ?.
    Eds speech was about others making asumptions about what he said , yes we were all quick on the vague “good company bad company ” and some had even spotted the hidden menace of his licenced journo , hidden in the Milly Dowler disgust .
    Eds speech is interesting because it was constructed that way (now we hear older bro helped , although could be pissing on his bonfire just to be safe) ,journo after journo “what did you mean by…..” and so his minnions were left to define eds speech better , not that in its self didnt cause more problems .
    Ed broke away from the past , by assuming an interesting position , that in my analysis was meaningless , he was suggestively giving the public somthing new about marxism , that the elusive eutopia of capitalism could be attained by making new dazzleing divisons of socialist constraints to markets and business . He said the a post liberal era was here , which inferes he thinks you will not be able to do what you want and corporate supply is the answer . This is only a slight adjustment from the position of the ruins electioneering personal credit tap opening , where corporate finance did supply the answer , of dreamy happyness via consumerism .

    if you re tune eds speech and fill in the blanks with corporate socialism/marxism , you end up with somthing a little more scary , good companies that are favoured , journalists that dont report bad things, and tax breaks for which ever companies ticks the goverment boxes , a sort of soft fascist corporate state begins to emerge from eds speech , very similar to what new labour actually did and its diabolical totalitarian consumer political ending , cheap credit but with ID cards .

    Eds speech , was an escape , a new imaganeered landscape titled “eutopia” , or perhaps dont look at the steaming heap of junk we have left you as economy , look at this in my new glossy brouchour , somthing for somthing , he was taking us all holiday , and that feeling of facing work when you return .
    he was perhaps being an early post soviet Bulgarian tour rep “over here we have the loverly 18th century palace of vlad the nice ” who somehow did not want to show you the only recently disused political torture block and prison , also owned by vlad the nice ,on whose tour bus you were on , due to a change in circumstances for vlad.

    Ed squirmed alot post his speech , he did his best not to fill in the blanks , creating more interest , it was dreamy marxist intellectual pap , very clever , very for the poor soft left enquiring mind , insoluble ,undefinable , intellectual , post Blair gene splice of soft fascist corporate marxism . It has been some time since we heard an intellectual marxist , string a clever speech together , bit early for Peter Obourne to get hooked , on labours leftovers and plan bs that they never quite conceived properly .

    There is nothing visonary in posing an intriugueing question to cover a vast client state deciet , when assuming eutopia , its always been part of socialism .

  227. 227
    Alois Shicklegruber says:

    The EU is plan B, dumpkopf!

  228. 228
    The Other Bloke says:

    He did.

  229. 229
    The Other Bloke says:

    It is an object lesson how physically hideous, politically incompetent and bereft of personality Labour women are that Caroline Flint should be considered as any kind of dressing.
    (Ha!Ha! Oil and vinegar dressing?)

  230. 230
    The Piss Soaked Tramp Formally Known As TAT! says:

    Give the wannabe comrade a dose of his own medicine he would dish out to ‘evil right wingers’ and stick him in a forced labour camp.

  231. 231
    Marmite says:

    Who are these m@rons who keep supporting Leiber? They truly must be br@in dead. If they ever get into power again, this Country is finished. Don’t these ars@holes have a brain? Obviously not.

  232. 232
    The Paragnostic says:

    Shekels, more like…

  233. 233
    The Paragnostic says:

    I thought he was a busted Bolshevik buffoon, badly broadcasting bullshit, but you’ve obviously made it further down the alphabet than I…

    (and I expect an extra emolument for ellipsis…)

  234. 234

    All Cameron has to do next time is to fulfill his promise of a referendum on the UK staying in the EU. If he does, he will win.

  235. 235
    365SM says:

    Dont care who wins but its important to tell them that whats the reason they are here for other then that just some peoples trying to achieve some great things……..But Great Power comes with Great Responsibilities…..!!!

  236. 236
    The Paragnostic says:

    Looks like my wheelbarrow shares are set to rise again – and our kids will refer to the next few years as the “Why, ma?” republic :-)

    The arrogance of the European political classes never fails to amaze me – they seem to think that the solution to the problem of going to hell in a handcart is to apply more grease to the wheels.

    Time to brush off the Mandarin phrasebook in preparation for our future masters, I think…

  237. 237
    The Paragnostic says:

    Looks like my wheelbarrow shares are set to rise again – and our kids will refer to the next few years as the “Why, ma?” republic :-)

    The arrogance of the Europëan political classes never fails to amaze me – they seem to think that the solution to the problem of going to hell in a handcart is to apply more grease to the wheels.

    Time to brush off the Mandarin phrasebook in preparation for our future masters, I think…

  238. 238
    101 ways to lose an election No 21 says:

    Its worse though…….Not only did “Dave” agree to allow Clegg to take part in the Prime Ministerial debates when everyone knew/knows that Clegg would never have won an overall majority but he then allowed Clegg to out-bullshit him in the first debate and was the unable to subsequently claw back Clegg’s lead in the polls to a sufficient level to gain an overall majority…that decision cost the Tories at least 10 seats

  239. 239
    101 ways to lose an election No 23 says:

    Is it he Tory Conference soon ? This is another populist “wizard wheeze” that despite the Daily Mail going bonkers over isn’t going to happen…in fact my council is introducing fortnightly collection next month ! When asked Eric Pickles concedes that well er no he has no actual power to enforce this and is merely hoping that byoffering encouragement to local councils they will comply voluntarily…… and if they don’t voters can of course always vote them out…the problem is that several of the councils doing this are CONSERVATIVE Eric !!! Doh ! I suspect another quiet u-turn in the offing

  240. 240
    Scargill's New Model Army of Flying Pickets says:

    If you thought the 80’s were grim you should have tried the 70’s ….aah I can still smell the piles of rubbish in the streets with rats scampering around your feet as the comrades fought evil Tory bosses to build the worker’s “New Jerusalem”………….which Thatcher immediately smashed although it had to be said the unions had already half completed the job for her !!

  241. 241
    albacore says:

    “If you leave your bin or rejected recycling out after collection you may be issued with a fixed penalty notice for £110 under Section 47ZA of the Environmental Protection Act 1990″.
    Lord, we’ve been subject to this crap for 21 years! Did anybody notice it all slip-sliding away?
    Yet Pickles reckons he can’t FORCE councils to make weekly collections.

  242. 242
    Spartacus says:

    +1 Agreed, maybe a smidgen too radical

  243. 243
    Spartacus says:

    +1 Agreed, maybe a smidgen too radical and it will certainly work

  244. 244
    albatross says:

    Deep. Good comment

  245. 245
    Stan Butler says:

    I couldnt’t give a fuck if my bin is collected weekly, daily or hourly. The main topic at the Conservative Conference should be European Referenda and the lack of democracy. Be it Red Ed at his conference or Nick Clogg as his, none of the major parties have offered the people a say on the continued membership of this left wing federalist wet dream. Cameron needs to fulfil his promise to the electorate on refernda in Europe and he should be held to account by activists at the conference.

  246. 246
    jgm2 says:

    No. Great Power comes with fucking enormous electricity bills.

  247. 247
    never mind the quality, feel the depth says:


    poor spelling and punctuation

  248. 248
    oddly helpful says:

    Ignore the abusive responses; click on the shortened link. Both it and most of the comments make worthwhile reading.

  249. 249
    It could only happen in Britain !!!! says:

    It’s all the fault of the EU….apparently or it is according to the local government and environment agency…no problems over the Channel they’d just burn the stuff in their backyards and fuck the EU Commission

  250. 250
    albatross says:

    Find it difficult to read without the pretty pictures eh?

  251. 251
  252. 252
    Handycock, No1 Trougher in Parliament says:

    You will soon be as famous as me, my Darling.

  253. 253
    Titford Hat says:

    3-bagger. The dog has sensibilities, you know.
    She looks to be no stranger to the pie shop.

  254. 254
  255. 255
  256. 256
    Anonymous says:

    ‘How to win the next election’

    Should be a short event.

    Give us our EU referendum Cameron you lying twat.

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