Reshuffle Rumours, Runners and Riders
McKechin, Hillier and Flint in Trouble
The one good thing Ed has got out of this conference is an end to the Shadow Cabinet elections. He can now clear out the rot and he has more than his fair share of underwhelming baggage. Hilary Benn, Meg Hillier, the Eagles, Caroline Flint, Ann McKechin and Ivan Lewis are all names being bandied around for the chop…
On Monday’s Newsnight Prezza accused many of the Shadow Cabinet of not pulling their weight in the planning row, explicitly suggesting that a reshuffle is required after it was left to the National Trust and charities to fight the government. This could only be a direct attack on the shadow local government minister Caroline Flint. During the riots she was nowhere to be seen and the Tories smell blood here. The problem for Ed is the majority of the under-performers around him are wimmin and yet the Shadow Cabinet must be at least 31% female. This could save Flint, but is also good news for those ladies looking to work their way up the ladder – Rachel Reeves (Oxon. PPE) is tipped for promotion, though she better keep quiet about her years in the banking sector. Labour insiders are also tipping Emma Reynolds (Oxon, PPE) and honorary sister Chuka…
So he has had enough of “winow dressing” then?
Sub-human scum
The Eagles can now Take It Easy.
Make way for a New Kid in Town
“honorary sister Chuka”
You’ve heard the rumours too, eh?
Witchy Woman.
It’s his third sex change.
You do know that Chi Onwurah is Chuka in drag?
Chi is utterly useless. Wouldn’t do any harm at all if she got her gender identity confusion properly sorted out.
Staying at Hotel California
Glen, how much of Peru has gone up your nose?
Why does it have to be 31% female?
There are 27 people in the shadow cabinet so 31% would equal 8.37 wimmin. I take it Mrs Balls is the one who is 0.37 woman and 0.63 other.
What about the man who think he is a bad dogs or the same one who wants to have women on women sex? Forgotten he is in another party.
I’m going. That Anonymous fucker’s back.
I am 100% female. I am a complete
A member like no other.
I’m glad two of the candidates are Oxbridge PPE graduates the two of them plus Balls equals five!! Innumerate fck wits the lot of them. I can only assume that espionage is rife at Oxbridge to undermine the Uk through the British establishment knowing all parties select PPE graduates who later become chancellor or shadow chancellor. Which ever country is sponsoring this has done a first class job in fcking up our economy.
Guido, you forgot to say the quota does not apply to MPs employing their spouse or family member. After all they are employed to bolster the salary of the MP, a bit like the second home is to bolster their pension.
Time for cut backs in MPs staffing, pay, pension and expenses. I’ll ask Ed as he is on line and he wants to correct the social failings of Britain, we might as well start with this lot of corrupt fckers!!
You are forgetting, Harriet the Harpie deemed Ed an honorary woman.
Very good. 999 to go.
Rarely has such in your face loser such as “Vicks Inhaler” come to the fore.Luckily the same forces that brought him to his lofty but limited ascendancy will be the same reasons for his ultimate and absolutely inevitable failure.
Rejoice and long may he may continue.
TWITTER YE NOT
@RoryJamesWealRory Weal
@lukejcr saw your email address on the list of people in the Newsnight audience, should be good!
23 Sep via web
Interesting.
BBC Insider Trading.
Looks like another BBC-National Socialist Workers Party set up.
Here’s a hint to all parties…
IF a candidate’s got a PPE reject them.
I shall go with the marxist paradigm:
Reject any candidate who aspires to be in the cabinet.
I was about to suggest that even a pig could get in if it had done PPE at Oxon but that could be very insulting to those already there.
The problem isn’t the degree, it is the people that aspire to do it.
But it’s still a good test of whom not the give the job to.
Agree, but they are merely a subset of “people who aspire to be politicians”. Those who think themselves capable of determining how other people should live before they’ve even lived themselves.
Whatever happened to public service after achieving something in your first career?
The degree or the job?
Aren’t they all a bunch of old women anyway?
Jack Dromey would fulfull the requirement to be a woman
“You know, I’m not Tony Blair. I’m not Gordon Brown either.”
Hardly a new insight.
Almost 1 year ago to the day Red Ed said
“I’m my own man,” the new Labour leader told BBC One’s Andrew Marr show.
26 September 2010
So, have you come up with anything else since then?
Come on Bill. Credit where credit is due. It was a perfectly understandable and unusually truthful statement compared with anyone else in his party.
As the polls show, he sure as hell is not anyone else’s man.
Ed can pretend he hadn’t realised Hilary Benn was male.
no, you are a knob
Was the next, deleted sentence “No I am the Milliband for the palnet Zarg”?
Or even “No, I am the Milliband from the planet Zarg”. These keyboards are tricky if you haven’t got humanoid fingers (or toes).
After his performance in relation to planning you’d think Prescott would have the self-awareness not to raise his head above the parapet.
Mind you he’s always been pretty thick.
Pretty is putting it mildly.
That fat slob Prescott wasted billions of pounds with his failed I.T and planning schemes . He is only fit to do his original job ,waiting on his betters.
Not at my fucking table, he’s not!
He didnt even rise to the giddy heights of sterward , he was a pot washer
True!
Maybe. But he could not even reach around his.
I bet he wishes he could give Balls the chop.
Or the snip?
We need more women. Go on Ed, have the op.
Pick me Ed. I’m fed up with Chuka’s greasy pole.
Don’t mention the name
***** SHANKLY *****.
the Shadow Cabinet must be at least 31% female.
Things looking up for Jack Dromey.
And Chris Bryant.
Please may I get down from the table.
I’ve finished whatever it was I was supposed to be doing here.
Make way for Balls, he’s going to take your seat
“Labour insiders are also tipping honorary sister Chuka.”
So that’s why Luciana was back on Chuka’s greasy pole last night.
Oi Miliband – let us see that list and change it or we’ll give you another Chinese burn.
Del Piero, Berger and Chuka will be preparing their acceptance statements now. Mark my words.
Right..I’m off for a wonk.
Not the lovely Ann McKechin – as Ozzy once said of Gary Moore ‘… has a face like a welder’s bench’
Or, like Ken Russell, a great face for radio.
What a motley f u c kin crew…..
It does not matter how you re arrange the deck chairs ,they are all a bunch of losers that will go down with the good ship Socialist Labour at next
general election led by Miliprat and Bollox.
This “Oxon, PPE” thing is beyond coincidence.
I will be returning to the cabinet later today as Prime Minister and Financial Saviour of the Known World.
After I’ve done a poo in my sock.
Love socks!
Especially filled ones.
I’d put balls on the chopping board
Rory from Maidstone in with a chance…? Shadow Educayshun brief?
What about Balls?
I don’t wish to be rude but I have seen more beauty in the pus seeping from the suppurating boils of a mange-ridden dog.
Raw sewage has more fragrance. Sludge oozing from the haemorrhoidal anus of a meths-addicted, piss-soaked, Whiskas-eating tramp is sweeter by far than the stench of this organism known as Balls.
Like the slime-coated turd that he is, he should have been flushed down the toilet and converted to biomass years ago. (I avoid the term fertilizer in case it ends up on my roses, thereby poisoning them.)
Rachel Reeves should just keep quiet – she sounds like Janet Screetch-Portargh when she opens it, more a sarf lundun then a Leeds accent.
Liz Kendall’s one to watch (History, Queens’ College, Cambridge) and so to is Dr Stella Creasy (Magdalene College, Cambridge, LSE).
Benn is safe he’s one of the few performers as Shadow LoftH)
Add Winterton, Byrne and Woodward to the endangered list.
Are these REAL people, or just more of the same Liebour clones who can spout the usual unconvincing claptrap?
Sorry, I think I know the answer to this one.
Stella was deselected as a Councillor by her local party.
You can’t flush a politician that easily.
As a member of the downtrodden masses under the thumb of these wicked Tory boo boys I am ready to serve and bring you the benefit of my long experience struggling against the odds.
I’ll get Daddy to drop me off in his Merc when we get back from the Apple store.
Look at the picture above – oh to be that cameraman and have a hammer in my back pocket…
Think bigger….much bigger…something to eradicate these useless Liebore chimps slowly, painfully and forever. It’s the least we can do.
That Shadow Cabinet in full.
Mrs Bob Crow
Ms Len McCluskey
Miss Dave Prentice
Mr Harriet Harman
Miss Mark Serowotka….
…..ad nauseum
And when it comes to cocks-out-on-the-table time, Harriet Harman has the longest of all.
I don’t mind having a sex change and, frankly sex would be a change.
What about that cuпt Shah, or has he got to stay to make up the figures for dodgy asian crooks?
Khan/Shah, it’s all the fuckin’ same innit?
PAH!
In order to exchange, it is a condition precedent that one has something to offer.
He promises the state wont steal everything they make.
Undeliverable forbearance.
Caroline Flint can become my cocksucker in chief when I become Emperor of the Universe.
I would not let her clean my toilets, let alone get near the prized equipment.
I’m sure I’ve mentioned it before..but if she’s going to get the push might as well do so again.
When in government she was known by the party as the Hovercraft, because she sucked up to everyone.
But she was known in the civil service also as the Hovercraft.
Because she was considered such a low flier.
Aha, the nutty sock-puppet is back!
Where’s your blog oh tat-thing?
Now you’ve finished twittering go and get the coffee in Chucka.
What sort of Hunt says, “..this noon..”?
Is he from some Bronte novel? Surprised he didn’t say luncheon.
I bet the good people at the Manufacturing Institute are happy now that their ideas have been heard by junior, shadow nothing.
They would have done just as well to tell the waiter whilst ordering their drinks.
Which big hitter is he going to make Shadow Scottish Secretary?
MacKehin has been a total loss – SLAB vote share in Scotland the lowest for 70 years – worse when you take away the Libdems who voted Labour in Scotland.
Hammered in May 2011 by the SNP, MacKehin’s number two Elmer Fudd left hiding in Subway from an irate Granny, their new saviour of Glasgow – Frank MacAveety – having his collar felt by the polis and dropped like a stone, Elmer has resigned but no one wants the job of Labour’s Scottish region puppet, yes I can just see all those Labour apparatchiks wanting Anne’s job ………
In the meantime Labour’s big idea to stop the SNP – The Calman Commission – is having a new arsehole ripped as Cameron tries to force Jonah Brown and Wendy Alexander’s big hairy caterpillar of a Scotland Act Amendment Bill on a hostile Scotland…. …. Independent Scotland and bankrupt Westminster here we come …
http://twitter.com/#!/lucianaberger/media/slideshow?url=http%3A%2F%2Flockerz.com%2Fs%2F142646739
oy fucking vey
Sad Cab Shuffle?
I think they’re all valuable assets to the Shadow cabinet
and should stay.
It’s really unfair to pick on a young and inexperienced politician after he spoke at conference. He may look a bit odd and speak weirdly but it is going too far to give him stick because of his privileged background. Leave Ed alone.
Just thought I’d let you know who I would appoint into my kitchen closet, starting with the Eagle brothers!
Spending our carbon credits like there’s tomorrow.
#no ooops
Crumbs, he’s more out of date than AlGor!
Prescott, anything for a freebe
It made the news in Asia Today.
“Chin Tu Fat, Honourable geisha Mandarin of Blair empire, talks dump at windy sleep seminar”
Yes John we Chinese value your input most highly and will, as you say in your northrn provinces, cock a deaf un
And this time no blocking our sewage plants with giant turds
Meg Hillier really has the most huge swollen tits, they are quite remarkable in fact
I have oft pondered the merits and of course potential de-merits in asking if I can spunk my load between them.
Welcome to the Hotel Shadow Cabinetta
We can check out any time we like
What was it that Fat Prezza said about good schools?
Old quote about good ones.
The popularity table is as follows:
1: Cooper
2: Balls
3: Burnham
4: Alexander
5: Harman
6:= Denham
6:= Murphy
8: Benn
9: Hain
10: Khan
11: Jowell
12: Healey
13: Eagle (Angela)
14: Flint
15: Byrne
16: Lewis
17: Eagle (Maria)
18: Creagh
19: Winterton
20: Hillier
21: Woodward
22: McKechin
http://www.labourlist.org/how-do-you-rate-the-shadow-cabinet
Popular with whom?
Numbers 10 – 22 will be reaching for the revolvers tonight. Imagine being less popular than Peter Hain.
Typical Labour. They think popularity is the main reason to be a cabinet member and not ability. I see Shaun Woodward is just about bottom but it is generally accepted that he was a very good Northern Ireland Minister. Yet Yvette Balls is at the top and she was totally out of her depth introducing HIPS as the Housing minister.
Ahh yes.. That famous commons moment.
Hansard – Cooper-Balls {minister communities and housing} “I remind the rt hon gen’lman that I do know what I’m doin’ and this legislation will ensure that people will want to take advantage of paying £400 for a piece of paper that no one really needs or reads.”
Quango – William MP {Surreysex} – “I see no rushing crowds. I see no queues to hand over cash…in fact, seeing as the training courses cannot be completed before the legislation … I see no HIPS”
Hansard.
Cooper-Balls {minister communities and housing} “I remind the rt hon gen’lman that I do know what I’m doin’…………..But for the life of me I can’t remember what house I declared as my main residence for Capital Gains Tax Purposes!
Despite being almost invisible since the election her relationship with tesicles will ensure that she is not reshuffled out.
Does Harman not qualify for the list?
Fascinating. That is a near total reversal of the order any sane person would give.
Precisely BM.
This must be a new usage of the word ‘popularity’ that we were previously unacquainted with.
It’s more like a list of who the public would like to stab.
Shows what Labour supporters think of the Shadow Scottish Secretary or is that Scotland as a whole?
In the meantime a ‘source’ in Labour’s Scottish region sock puppet control has basically said that two out of the three current applicants for Elmer Fudd’s job as chief sock puppet, Stairheid Rammy Lamont and ‘Who are you?’ MacKenzie are rubbish.
Even for a Scot I’m finding it hard just keep up with who in Labour’s Scottish sock puppet control has whose knife (and in some cases knives) in their back.
Labour the party built on sand.
Someone should tell Ed the one about moving the deckchairs around on a sinking ship.
Kevin_Maguire BREAKING NEWS: tom_watson back at the bar. And I don’t mean training to be a barrister. Though MPs say that would be less of a shock 7 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite
Billy, why would I be interested in the movements of a fucking fat spastic like Watson
?
Whatever happened to that silly cow who Labour stuck out in front of the cameras last year (?)….and who then got herself crucified by the media?
Can’t remember her name…and, frankly, can’t be bothered to Google her.
Where is she this year?
I find It quite amusing that I’m so lazy, that I don’t even get up to go to the toilet.
I usually just piss myself laughing.
If Millipede wanted to inject some credibility into his front bench, he’d have to lose the economic architects of the last period of government – Balls, Cooper and Byrne in particular. Somehow, the possibility of their being handed economic responsibility again after the total disaster of their last attempt makes the Labour party look very unelectable. However, since they’re at the top of the popularity table (as selected by fellow MPs), his hands are tied. He is indeed between a rock and a hard place.
Oh dear. How sad. Never mind…
FFS, Presclott telling others they aren’t pulling their weight.
The fat twat doesn’t do irony, obviously.
He does do pie-rony though.
IGMC
Interesting body language. Literally only one in the photo not showing hands above table is Ed Balls. Not mirroring your leader then Ed? Something to hide??
Shadows? More like shite. A sad bunch of no-hopers, and sadly, a reflection of those demented or deluded enough to vote for them.