September 27th, 2011

Red Ed Returns

The reaction to the speech from the left should have Labour strategists worried. From The Guardian:

  • Resident Stalinist apologist Seumas Milne: ‘The most radical speech delivered by a Labour leader for a generation’
  • Julian Glover: ‘To be cruel, Tony Benn has got his party back. Red Ed is back…’
  • Martin Kettle: ‘An eloquent restatement of the old-time religion in difficult times’
  • Jackie Ashley: ‘I’m no Tony Blair’

Jackie Ashley is right, this was not the speech of a triple-election winning Labour Party leader..

UPDATE: Blairite Shadow Defence Secretary Jim Murphy not happy:


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    So he spent a year trying to shake of the tag and the undone all the work in a 40 min speech?

  2. 2
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:


    This is bad on a few fronts, If Ed goes to the looney left he will make himself un electable, It also means that Dave Cameron does not have to shift from his centre left polices.

    either way Right wingers are going to be disappointed.

  3. 3
    England Football Fans says:

    He’s a wonk, he’s a gonk,
    He’s only ever had one bonk,
    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaaand.

    He’s a tit, he’s a shit,
    To be a leader he’s not fit,
    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaand.

    *repeat until pissed*

  4. 4
    Ed's speech has to beat it says:

    I love that the news channels are showing blanket coverage of the trial of Michael Jackson’s doctor. Ed’s been relegated. :-D

  5. 5
    England Football Fans says:

    He’s a wonk, he’s a gonk,
    He’s only ever had one bonk,
    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaaand.

    He’s a tit, he’s a shit,
    To be a leader he’s not fit,
    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaand.

    *continue until pissed*

  6. 6
    Anonymous says:


  7. 7
    Mike Litorus says:

    They wont be disappointed if they choose to vote for UKIP, a far more credible tory party than the tories themselves…

  8. 8
    Juggler says:

    Even if you’re a floating voter who doesn’t give a toss about politics you’ll tune in and see the weird handwaving and hear odd voice and think “this bloke hasn’t got it”.

    Labour keep electing losers and if the party wants power it needs to ditch him quick otherwise the country will think they’re nutters and block them from power for a generation.

  9. 9
    Officer Crabtree says:

    It wasn’t really speech in any sense of the work.

    It lacked a narrative, delivery, content, pith and conviction. It was more a collection of leftie words vomitted forth by a polical straw man.

    Ed Milidand reminds me of the Paul Whitehouse character in the Harry Enfield sketch show. The bloke in the pub who changes his position, argument and mind merely to agree with the other persons view.

    Trying to be all things to all people doesn’t work. At this rate the whole country will soon hate him.

  10. 10
    Geoffrey G Brooking says:

    More like Red Ed back to his Patronising best.

  11. 11

    I met the UKIP candidate for the last general election in a pie shop, just a couple of weeks before the election. She’d forgotten to get her papers in, and so wasn’t on the ballot, and she also smelled of piss.

    UKIP are well placed to capitalise on the current disasterous state of British politics, but not when their candidates resemble demented tramps.

    That’s just my opinion of course.

  12. 12
    Loony LimpDums are at it again says:

    An MP’s wife was caught on CCTV as she sneaked into the home of her husband’s mistress to steal a kitten, a jury heard.

    Birmingham Crown Court was told that Christine Hemming, Liberal Democrat MP John Hemming and his lover, Emily Cox, were involved in a ”love triangle” at the time of the alleged offence last September.

  13. 13
    Ewanme says:

    LMAO !!

    I ain’t particularly in touch wiv reality but “‘The most radical speech delivered by a Labour leader for a generation’” made me reassess my insanity , darlin x .

    E x .

  14. 14
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Regulation, Regulation,Regulation!

  15. 15
    Stavros says:

    Poor bloke. It’s painful to watch someone fail in public.

    His speech was weird, the tone was like a teenager wailing “it’s not fair”.

  16. 16
    Stavros says:

    Farage is good on TV but the rest of UKIP are well dodgy.

  17. 17
    Barnehurst Bob says:

    When Labour/unions elect the leader they want, they lose elections. It has been ever thus. Blair, not popular with the left or the unions, could win elections, by lying to the electorate. Thank god he’s gone and no one like him is waiting in the wings. thast includes banana boy!

  18. 18
    Gooey Blob says:

    I usually listen to the Labour leader’s speech, but didn’t bother this year. It’s not as though Labour are going to have a PM for several years.

    Once labour’s deficit has been reduced the incumbents will deserve a second term. Only if things start to go bad in a second term will I take Labour seriously again.

  19. 19
    Polly Seewonk says:

    ‘Cox pussy whipped’ is hardly news.

  20. 20

    Do you like my new Moniker, or do you think I should call myself

    Ed Balls is a Hunting hypocrital gobshite!!

  21. 21
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Looks as if the scousers stole Red’s power lines, and his script.

  22. 22
    Stavros says:

    Got to agree. Miliband’s a loser and if Labour can’t see this, they’re going down.

    If they can’t pick a decent leader, there’s no way you’d let them run the NHS, schools and economy.

  23. 23
    Been out and about says:

    Fancy missing the blackout in a speech by some nonentity in the Liebour party,I am really gutted.

  24. 24
    jgm2 says:

    The headlines write themselves.

    ‘Cat Burglar apprehended’.

  25. 25
    Bob Crowe says:

    Thats my boy !!!

  26. 26
    genghiz the kahn says:

    All that wonderful state education, O levels, A levels, an Oxford Degree, his father’s contacts, his seemless ascent to power, and he still can’t deliver a good speech.

  27. 27

    Imagine the scene. Red Ed Millitwat – Wooster is reading a book in his study when he is rudely disturbed by a knock on the door.

    Wooster : What is it Balls?

    Balls : Bad news sir. Our policy wonks have been doing some research and come up with some alarming problems with this multi- culti thing.

    Wooster : Well spit it out man!!

    Balls : Well sir apparently all the Poles we’ve let in are Catholic, dont like abortion and take a dim view of homosexuals.

    Wooster : Oh dear, oh well cant be helped is there anything else Balls?

    Balls: Yes sir. Their country was invaded by German socialists and then by Russian socialists and consequently they tend to view political parties such as ours with a considerable degree of pertubation.

    Furthermore they believe in self reliance and family values. their 2nd and 3rd generations are never going to vote for us.

    Wooster : Well what complete Fuckwit let these bastards in.

    Balls : We did sir!!

    Wooster : Well split me nose open with a boat hook. whats to be done? Balls please tell me what colour are these Poles?

    Balls : According to reliable sources they are white sir.

    Wooster : Well there’s your pigeon!!

    Balls : Yes sir, If I may be so bold as to suggest a masking operation. I will make a speech laying into these whitey immigrant bastards and generally giving the impression that we actually give a shit about immigration and that will convince the naive and gullible!!

    Wooster ” Yes you do that straight away!

    You know Balls I will get on with my reading. At the moment im reading an academic report into the condition of the English working class. Do you know Balls it says here on page 114 that in 21st century Britain people outside of Islington and Notting Hill manage to live their entire lives without the services of Butlers, Valets, Nannies, cooks and such. Incredible but true. The stuff you can learn from books eh Balls!!

    Balls : Yes sir!!

  28. 28
    Jack Carter says:

    You are in touch with reality, Ewanme. That’s your problem.

  29. 29
    Sir William Waad says:

    Who knows – perhaps dave will make a conservative speech at the Tory conference! What a turn-up that would be!!

  30. 30

    Red ed, fist raised beside Tooting underground.


  31. 31
    Fake Blood says:

    Christ, we’re doomed. Come on, Rupert, trash this bastard ASAP.

  32. 32
    Is Tim Henman the most underemployed BBC freeloader ever? says:

    Stick with that one, Nick.

  33. 33
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    More chance of Gordon turning up to work at Parliament .

  34. 34
    Engineer says:

    Reality is an illusion caused by lack of alcohol.

  35. 35
    Sir William Waad says:

    Which means precisely what to us? Why are they obsessed by US trivia – can it be because it’s handed to them on a plate by the US media?

  36. 36
    What a plonker. says:

    The only Labour tosser worse than Red Ed is bug eyed Balls, who would
    make a great leader . Bring it on .

  37. 37
    Damien 666 Thompson says:

    Nice one!

  38. 38
    What a plonker. says:

    Best to wait three years ,and then go for it.

  39. 39
    jgm2 says:

    As they’re so fond of saying about Cameron, Ned Miliband has had life handed to him on a plate. Not for him an upbringing of low aspiration or struggle. Nope. Just a path greased through the system to deliver him and his equally idiot brother to the top of British politics.

    Anybody else would have been sussed as an insipid sp*e*k*er years ago. Wouldn’t have even made it through a local selection committee but with his dad’s fixers in place – WHHHEEEEEEEE – up through the party like a fucking rocket. And now this is the nasal gimpoid that Labour will be fronting to ap*p*e*al to the voters.

    For those of us who wish to see Labour in opposition for a thousand years he is a gift from God.

  40. 40
    Saunders says:

    What has any of this got to do with Nick Clegg ? Along with Chris Huhne he is one of the most principled men in the coalition. The Tories put him in an arm lock and beat him into breaking his election pleges. Its a disgrace.

  41. 41
    Ewanme says:

    Hiya , plonker :)

    Unfortunately , nothin you sez or does is gonna prevent Labour from gettin in next time , sweetheart x .

    Jus enjoy the recession whiles you can .

    E x .

  42. 42
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

    I think I can safely say that I have raised my game all the way from ‘dire’ to ” chronically mediocre’ today.

  43. 43
    Baddabing says:

    What you don’t seem to realise is that a VAST proportion of people will always vote Labour “cos me dad does”, because they believe Thatch was equivalent to Hitler, and because they beleive the Tories are in it for the rich.

    Milliband could be a turd on a stick and he would poll 35 to 40%.

    Dave has to get mongrol and expose this shower of shit for the incompetent fucktards they really, really are. No Labour politician should ever be in a position to influence government policy ever again. They have fucked the country, one more term and they will kill it for good, no recovery, not ever. The real Nasty Party, snivelling, immature, vindictive bunch of C***S

    Ed’s speech, shit or whatever, won’t be noticed by the avaerage street Labourite. Most of them won’t even know who he is. They will vote Labour anyway, as that’s what decades of social and economic experimentation has left us as a legacy.

    Truly shameful.

  44. 44
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    It wasnt that good.

  45. 45
    Ah! Monika says:

    Another One !!

  46. 46
    Engineer says:

    Didn’t listen to Ed’s speech (life’s too short for that sort of stuff), and I gather that News International made a small point by cutting him off (hehe), but have heard the reports, at excrutiating length, on the PM programme.

    For me, Ed lost it when he claimed that Labour would be the party of the squeezed middle. Given that his party, and the cabinet of which he is a part, spent 13 long years squeezing the middle, starting with Brown’s tax-grab of personal pension funds, he will have to get a lot of people like Balls, Cooper, Byrne et al to do a complete 180 before he can come close to claiming that.

    The bloke’s deluded, and I suspect the public have worked him out.

  47. 47
    Geoffrey G Brooking says:

    He’s a geek, he’s weak,

    His office is full of leaks,

    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaaand.

  48. 48
    Ah! Monika says:


    Just got a message up ” You are posting too quickly slow down “

  49. 49
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Thing is Labour dont stand for anyone, they doubled tax on the lowest paid, they rasied tax on the richest, so that leaves the squeezed middle, But they have been shafted as well.

    Which just leaves the unions…………

  50. 50
    smoggie says:

    Union chief: We’ll occupy hospitals and libraries

    Unite general secretary Len McCluskey said a day of action on November 30 would unleash an “industrial battle”.

    When these expense-account overweight union bosses start ranting in their sharp suits and designer glasses one can’t help thinking just who are the “fat cats”.

  51. 51
    Princess Polytwaddle, her moyth filled with silver spoons, talking down at people from her Ivory Tow says:

    I am always RIGHT!

    I am never WRONG!!!!

    I do not waste my time with little people, – small ignorant people who do not have the range, nor the grasp of prominent Socialshit Intellectual’s such as myself!

    Indeed, – I don’t know why I waste my time on them – oh yes I do, – so I get a good pay cheque from the Grouniad, – they love me!

    I love me!

    All the intelligent world loves me!

  52. 52
    jgm2 says:

    I don’t think a decent leader would help them do that either. Whatever you might think of Blair he was a decent leader. He did get them elected three times even after he’d embroiled us all in the Iraq war.

    The problem was that Blair couldn’t rely on the people below him. The likes of Brown who ran the economy purely to buy votes and influence. The likes of the useless John Prescott – kept around to a*p*p*eal to the knuckle-draggers of the North and for his Tourette’s approach to soundbites ‘ASHCROFT’? Did somebody mention ‘ASHCROFT’?

    Actually, I briefly caught Prescott on TV a couple of nights ago with Paxo and he sounded borderline coherent even though he kept to the big lie about the economy being all the fault of the banks and certainly not his imbecile government’s over-spending. Fuck no.

  53. 53
    Cell time says:

    Not on R4, you’d think he was the new messiah

  54. 54
    Wed Ed says:

    But my daddy was a marxist academic, I’m not the toff son of a stock broker.

    So my privelaged upbringing makes me more like normal people.

  55. 55
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    they belong to the taxpayer, not the public sector parasites.

  56. 56
    smoggie says:

    blanket coverage of the trial of Michael Jackson’s doctor.

    A black man killing a whitey. He’s got no chance.

  57. 57
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Did anyone else notice that his flies weren’t properly zipped up during his speech ?

  58. 58
    jgm2 says:

    Just like Labour press briefings are handed to them on a plate.

    It must be fucking magic being a Labour politician. Just write anything you like. The first thing that comes into your head and then see it beamed into the living rooms of the nation as ‘fact’ at 9.00PM.

  59. 59
    Mike Litorus says:

    Yes, I’d come to that conclusion myself. However, when I look at the ‘Big Three’ (in the loosest terms for the Lib Dums) I think to myself they could not be any worse.

    The only alternative to UKIP would then be to wipe my arse with the ballot. Labour would probably count that as one for themselves though.

  60. 60
    smoggie says:

    I think a Jarrow March would do some of those lard-arses so much better than a sit-in.

  61. 61
    Ewanme says:

    I likes a party wot’s leader is prepared to wrap himself in slogans an plummet to the ground for the cause .

    E x .

  62. 62
    Cheers! says:

    Engineer, – I salute your pers- perrsi – peeersp- perspicacity and insight into the real matters of life!

    You Sir, – are an Hero! And as such you will always be to me!

    I raise my glass to you!

  63. 63
    Anonymous says:

    I thought it was not unlike a poorly written, poorly delivered student union pitch.

    Which is about his level.


  64. 64
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Make the fuckers run on a treradmill and genrate electricty, becaome a proper public servent :-)

  65. 65
    Jumbo says:

    Oh dear, it’s that time of year again. a season of mist and mellow fruitlessness.

  66. 66
    nell says:

    He also said they needed their members to go out and get themselves arrested on the day.

    I note he wasn’t volunteering for that – no doubt he and bobcrow already have their restaurant table booked on 30th november in their favourite five star restaurant complete with bottles of top of the range champagne , all paid for by the subs from their gullible members.

    socialism at work so to spe @ k.

  67. 67
    Ed's speech has to beat it says:

    Yeah but at least it’ll piss of Labour and Tom Badwind.

  68. 68
    Polly's la.bia says:

    oooooh – Mike Clkitoris – you sho am de man fo me! – and I speak in the squirming vernacular of a woman in the throes of heat that can only be quenched by the . . . by the . . . by . . .

  69. 69
    nell says:

    labour is where it is today because of people like her.

  70. 70
    jgm2 says:

    She’s getting increasingly paranoid. Coming below the line and raving about ‘Tory trolls’ ie anybody who doesn’t buy her perverse twist on reality with uncritical support.

    I really do think that the bedwetters over there thing there is some co-ordinated T*ry plot to trash the articles these jackasses write. They’ll be demanding to see our bank accounts soon to see if Lord Ashcroft is paying folk to trash Polly and Ned Balls and Angela Eagle and the imbecilities they write.

  71. 71
    Anonymous says:

    I thought it came across as a poorly written, poorly delivered student union pitch.

    Which is about his level.


  72. 72
    Get a Grip says:

    I hope the Tories are going to have the stones to lay into Labour for their constant outrageous lies about the NHS and the supposed privatisation thereof.
    They need to point out that the principle of the NHS and the institution of the NHS are not the same thing. They need to spell it out and yell it out.
    As for Milliband,if he was any wetter, every divining rod on the planet would be permanently pointed in his direction.

  73. 73
    Barnehurst Bob says:

    I agree, it’s obvious he’s a loser. Best to support him for a while, make out he’s got what it takes to be PM. They’ll lose the next election with him in charge and god knows that can only be good for the country. we just can’t afford to have another Labour government for a century or two.

    Save Ed until the next election, it’s the best chance of keeping them out!

  74. 74
    Mickey Smithson says:

    Two Yanks go two Ireland for a vacation,they go two the pub and order an Irish car bomb. The bartender glares at them for a second and grins, he grabs two shot glasses fills them with 151 and sets em’ on fire “Sorry we dont serve car bombs here but we do serve Twin Towers”

  75. 75
  76. 76
    nell says:

    And let’s not forget Eng , militwit was gordon brown’s minister for anthropogenic global warming, the biggest lie perpetrated by labour after bliar’s wmd at 45mins lie.

  77. 77
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    wdjstraw Rowenna Davis: big weakness of Blue Labour is lack of substance on climate change #lab11 #ippr 3 minutes ago · reply · retweet · favorite

  78. 78
    Anonymous says:

    “and I suspect the public have worked him out.”

    The public have no idea who he is.


  79. 79
    jgm2 says:

    Ned always sounds like the headmaster’s son that they’ve allowed to join the debating society in the fourth form instead of the sixth form like all the other kids.

    Embarrassingly bad. Like watching that X-Factor ‘special’ where they showcase the talentless, borderline retarded contestants getting mocked by the panel and audience.

    Proof that Ned has no mates. Because if he did then they wouldn’t let him do this in public.

    Nobody to take him to one side and give it ‘Look mate, I’ve known you for years….’

  80. 80
    smoggie says:

    Will she take a couple of Dale Farm families in her Tuscan second home for the winter?

    Or is that somebody else’s responsibility?

  81. 81
    Bad says:

    Its a hell of a lot more interesting than Milliblands speech.
    Cha’mone muthafuka !

  82. 82
    Johann Hari says:

    I’m keeping the £2k Orwell prize money you bastards!

  83. 83
    Barnehurst Bob says:

    He must of watched a different speach Bill, I’d say he went down from dire to calamitous.

  84. 84
    Geoffrey G Brooking says:

    Let’s have a good sing song everyone:

    A one-teo-three AND:

    He’s a wonk,

    He’s a gonk,

    He’s only ever had one bonk,

    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaaand.

    He’s a geek, he’s weak,

    His office is full of leaks,

    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaaand.

    He’s a tit, he’s a shit,

    To be a leader he’s not fit,

    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaand!

    He never gets the hint

    He left the country skint

    And when our Red Ed was Climate Change Secretary I it was his last Cabinet stint!

    He hates opinion polls,

    They always play on his soul,

    But when the grey men come and get him,

    His excuse was the unions scoring own goals!

    Bye, Bye Red Ed – Red Ed Bye, Bye!

  85. 85
    Catherine Zeta Milliband says:

    Kitten boiler ?

  86. 86
    Barnehurst Bob says:


  87. 87
    boulay says:

    is that “blanket” coverage as in his son is doing the coverage?

  88. 88
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:—instant-reaction

    “No-one will remember it next year”

  89. 89
    jgm2 says:

    Yeah. Great. Get themselves arrested and possibly charged and jailed too.

    Possibly lose their jobs. Possibly lose their home as a result. Certainly require their employer to arrange cover while they’re in custody/court/prison.

    And then find, as Will Straw did, that because the Maximum potential sentence for their crime was more than 12 months that they can’t go on that family holiday to Disneyland Florida after all.

    Fucking great lads.

    These idiots really learned nothing from Scargill did they?

  90. 90
    the last quango in paris says:

    If Justine’s first words in the morning are “its sick that someone would do that”, I think that’s called too much information.

  91. 91
    jgm2 says:

    Nobody will remember it next day.

    Hardly the kind of barnstorming conference speech that Cameron gave that caused the Maximum Imbecile to b*o*tt*le the snap election he would almost certainly have won.

  92. 92
    Is The Labour led Edinburgh Council institutionally corrupt ? says:

    He had the cheek to go on about the evils of privilage and having the right connections which he delivered with no hint of irony. I LOL’d like fuck when I heard that.

  93. 93
    Mobius says:

    Looks like a very bad, possibly defining speech. Reaction from neutrals very poor, even from the left it’s not getting much traction. Seems to have defined himself as statist interventionist, “good companies” “bad companies”, (how do they know?) whilst not giving any solid policies.

    The feedback on this speech is trending towards defining it as disastrous. Only the left wing of the left wing appears even moderately pleased by it.

  94. 94
    England Football Fans says:

    Barmy as a bat, the fucker’s a twat
    Looks like something my cat shat,
    Milibaaaand, Milibaaaand.

  95. 95
    Ratsniffer says:

    “The Labour leader said he wanted the UK to become a country where responsible “grafters” were rewarded”

    So let me see now… labour spent more than a decade milking “grafters” dry and redistributing the money to their pet client groups in the hope of buying votes. And this marxist idiot thinks we will ever trust them with our tax money again?

  96. 96
    Barnehurst Bob says:

    Thank god for Polly

  97. 97
    Uncle Sam says:

    Guys – this dude can make a goddamn speech thats for sure. This man is your next Winston Churchill. What is wrong with you guys? Here is your inpirational leader – he is one of the greatest speakers I have heard from the UK in a long long time – and no tele-prompter! Obama are you watching this english guy??

    If you don’t want him send him over to us! We’ll send you Obama.

  98. 98
    Anonymous says:

    Were they not booing the fact he said he wasn’t Blair?!

  99. 99
    Nimby says:

    Although I dont normally advocate additional taxation I would actually support a tax which finances the relocation of the Dale Farm non Romany gypsie Irish non travellers to a site adjacent to Pollys Villa in Tuscanny.

  100. 100
    jgm2 says:

    I think Ned needs to look at the definition of ‘graft’.

    Most Labour voters and supporters are grafters:

    graft 2 (grft)
    1. Unscrupulous use of one’s position to derive profit or advantages; extortion.
    2. Money or an advantage gained or yielded by unscrupulous means.
    tr. & intr.v. graft·ed, graft·ing, grafts
    To gain by or practice unscrupulous use of one’s position.

  101. 101
    Derek Smalls says:

    This was the warm up act. Ed, graciously, filled in for me on bass whilst I had an urgent appointment with Percy Porcelain.

  102. 102
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    They might well do that, but will it be plastered across the B-bbc with a positive spin?

    I doubt it, what we’ll get instead is cuts, splits and more cuts, all shown in a bad light, with snide remarks and lots of positive liebore rebuttles.

  103. 103
    W.W. says:

    What about “Education, Education, Education” – “Tough on Crime, Tough on the Causes of Crime” – Prescott’s “10 year intergrated transport policy” – Browns “End of Boom and Bust” – “0% growth”

    It is indeed a long list.


  104. 104
    tosser watch says:

    You are a tosser.

  105. 105
    Jim says:

    Sad, but true

  106. 106
    jgm2 says:

    Naaah. The T*ries have the right idea on managing the presentation of this. Don’t. Don’t manage the presentation.

    As soon as you start explaining what the hell you’re up to then you’re sounding defensive. Plus it will draw no end of fire.

    The best thing to do is simply get on with it. Nobody cares except for the bedwetters. We all know the NHS is synonymous with vested interests, cover-ups and death camps.

    Just do what you’re going to do. Let the bedwetters have their day of rage on 30th November. It’ll generate headlines for a few days and then die down again. There’s no point the T*ries keeping it in the news any longer than necessary.

  107. 107
    Frank Spencer says:

    I’m my own man. Oooh, Betty.

  108. 108
    Aliens from the planet Zog says:

    Why do both Millibeans look like they’ve been emulshioning the ceiling?

  109. 109
    gildedtumbril says:

    X factor? The x stands for excrement.
    Red ed should be on it. He is on course for the dustbin of history, where he can join that bastard pillock and his clan.

  110. 110
    Splooge says:

    ’tis true…

    I voted for my local UKIP bod, but he not a particularly impressive specimen

  111. 111
    Geoffrey G Brooking says:

    So I Say Thank You for your great speech – and sounding like a man without a plan!

  112. 112
    Duncan says:

    So according to Labour Central, what was missing from Michael Foot’s campaign? Non-specific talk about tax cuts and the charismatic appeal of Ed Balls as chancellor.

    Can I please encourage all the right wingers to get more adamant about things like bringing the death penalty back? Speaking as a LibDem I’d like to retain some of my party and the best way to do that is for the Tories to lurch violently to the right and Miliband to try to relive 1983. Cheers.

  113. 113
    Ed Balls stroking a cat in a swivel chair says:

    Soon, all this will be mine! Mwwhhhhaaaaa!

  114. 114
    Splooge says:


  115. 115
    Rightallalong says:

    According to Miliband, Ed Balls has been proved right on the economy. Oh dear oh dear – they’re so deluded..

    Also it made me nearly vomit when Miliband, once again, tried to make political capital from poor Milly Dowler’s murder. Just let her rest.

    Finally he preached “The promise that if you teach your kids the difference between right and wrong and bring them up properly, they will get a good job, and a decent home. ”

    So do you teach your children that it’s fine to betray each other, as Ed did to David ?

  116. 116
    Uncle Sam says:

    Man, I wouldn’t care if she looked like Ugly Betty and smelled like a racoon so long as she delivered good on what she promised.

  117. 117
    Splooge says:


  118. 118
    gildedtumbril says:

    UKIP(while they steal) is a frigging con party.It is financed from central ‘government’ as a safety valve for nationalists who do not have the balls to vote for the only British party.

  119. 119
    Bob "The Wanker" Crow says:

    Strikes, Strikes, Strikes!

    Let’s show em who’s in charge!

  120. 120
    Troy Tempest says:

    Cox in pussy snatch?

  121. 121
    Jasmin Alibi Cunt says:

    Some lazy, degenerate, scum c’unt from the Fire Brigade called Tim Montgomerie a Neocon earlier on Radio Five Labour

    Larfin at dumb labour cu’nts

  122. 122
    Ewanme says:

    This could be a metaphor for Ed’s speech , I spose . Luv it !!!

  123. 123
    Ed Milliband says:

    I believe in producers rather than predators

    I should know… Hampstead is full of Labour predators

    But I will cover for them with my populist hypocrisy until they can emigrate

  124. 124
    Diane Abbott's rectum says:

    Never underestimate the cretinous stupidity of hard leftist filth

    Hard left filth dont come any lower than the Fire Brigade, although Prison warders run them close

  125. 125
    gildedtumbril says:

    If red ed had got up and said,”I’m going to read out the first 1000 entries in the local phone directory”, he would still have got a standing ovation.
    Such is the stupidity of the labour arseholes.

  126. 126
    Ronnie Cohen Private equity says:

    Don’t worry Eddy

    Most of us have already left

  127. 127
    Jack says:

    Blairites are unhappy because they are the predators

    Just look at Blair and Mandelson

    Great “producers”


  128. 128
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Harman has just been interviewed on Channel 4 News. She is just a common liar, typical of labour. She is a stupid stupid woman. Why doesn’t the media get stuck into these labour liars.

  129. 129
    Postal Vote says:

    Ah , the Guardian is doing its job again, explaining how beeb and other leftish media should report a labour speech, event or policy.

    I wish Guardian reporters well when, just ahead of their death, they contemplate over what they call a career as a professional journalist with an independent mind …

  130. 130
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    beep beep reboot

  131. 131
    Moral Collapse Blair says:

    It is not true

    I always said I was a true Labour left winger

    Just to cover up for my cupidity, greed and influence peddling once I left office

    Milliband will do the same thing as soon as he leaves politics

    It is in Labour’s genes to rip off the people

  132. 132
    dragon den says:

    I was on a train to Eastbourne when the UKIP faithful were on the way to their conference, a more hopeless looking bunch it would be harder to find. But Farage knows that if he were to get a higher quality membership he wouldn’t last 10 minutes.

  133. 133
    gildedtumbril says:

    …and, when red ed said that a labour government would not spend more money than it has, he failed to mention that they lay claim to every penny in your pocket or purse and,AND your greatgrandchildrens’s (yet unborn) pockets or purses.
    He is a marxist bastard. As is camoron.
    How come all these faggots have beards?

  134. 134
    BBC producer says:

    Labour and the luvvies (and the taxpayer!) keep us in junkets, freebees and the white stuff, silly…

  135. 135
    UN observer says:

    Why did they only boo Blair ?

    Surely Brown should have got his dose…

  136. 136
    jgm2 says:

    Aye. And teach your boys to make sure, when they get older, that their name is omitted from any birth certificates so that the CSA will not be able to chase you for your share of the upkeep of any little bastards you may have out of wedlock.

  137. 137
    Eddy's favourite banker says:

    Gilts will soon become as worthless as Irish government bonds

  138. 138
    jgm2 says:

    The government are the fucking predators.

    They take money off us to give to their rapacious locust constituents. Or ‘key-workers’ as they like to be called.

  139. 139
    I bought my peerage off Lord Levy says:

    I now live offshore Guido

    I find it hugely amusing that young Eddy should talk about predators when the whole of New Labout wer predators…and worse…like me…ROFL…

  140. 140
    Madoff Mandelson says:

    I find it unacceptably offensive for the leader of the Labour Party to call me a predator

    How dare he ?

  141. 141
    Bobg says:

    Living in the past. Got you guys scared hasn’t it?

  142. 142
    Nate says:

    Don’t worry Mandy

    I can organise your residence in Gstaad

  143. 143
    MI5 says:

    Where is Saif Gaddafi Nate ?

  144. 144
    I don't need no doctor says:

    snort a line now – courtesy of the late great Frank Zappa.

  145. 145
    Dr Spock says:


  146. 146
    nell says:

    Actually I feel a bit sorry for down and out labour.

    I know they deserve everything they get for robbing our pensions, destroying our economy and for the way bullyballs has trashed what was once a decent education system.

    But if they had come to power with John Smith they maybe would have been a much more decent party with a clean and respected heritage instead of the soiled mafia that they have become.

  147. 147
    Sarah Twatter says:

    There’s no way Gordon has got a dose.

  148. 148
    Nomdip Lume says:

    “A black man killing a whitey.”

    Very good!

  149. 149
    smoggie says:


  150. 150
    Sky TV's Uplink Satellite says:

    Sorry, I just dozed off there for a minute. Did I miss anything?

  151. 151
    The wizz says:

    I was awaiting a caption that read ‘DO NOT ADJUST YOUR MIND, THERE’S A FAULT IN REALITY’.

  152. 152
    Keats says:

    Right. Fuck it. Where’s the hemlock?

  153. 153
    jgm2 says:

    I assume he’s referring to the whole 1970’s class-war, strike-strike-strike, retro rhetoric of New Old Labour.

  154. 154
    Vanessa Redgrave says:

    My dad tried something like that a long time ago.

  155. 155
    Nomdip Lume says:

    “No Labour politician should ever be in a position to influence government policy ever again.”

    That’s Cameron f***ed then. He may have Conservative written on his notepaper but he is still a Socialist turd bobbing around in the foetid waters of Westminster.

  156. 156
    The wizz says:

    LOL Thumbs up +10

  157. 157
    nell says:

    Living in the past brings to mind scargill, 3 day week, streets filled with uncollected garbage , crematoriums unable to function………

    It showed labour in it’s true light and helped to keep people like foot and kinnoch out of no.10.

    If the unions choose to revisit those tactics this winter , it will just be another nail in labour’s coffin.

  158. 158

    Red Ned conference speech
    {short version}


    Give a man a fish, and he will have a fish.

    Teach a man to fish and he’ll have no more need to vote for your fish giving policies.

    So .. just keep giving him a fish.

    {Applause, cheers and cries of ‘when’s the band coming on?’}

  159. 159
    The Liebour party says:


  160. 160
    Herman van Rumpoy says:

    Is that a European fish caught in the North Sea ?

  161. 161

    Strikes are almost guaranteed to make wavering bluey/yellows support the government against the strikers. Private sector still employs 5:1 over public sector.

    Red Ed avoided saying ‘You people must work longer and harder and pay more taxes to pay the pensions of my union backers members.”

    But the unions will make him take a stand in November. S

    Remember Bobg, its how Thatcher got in. She didn’t have much hope of becoming PM before the winter of discontent.

  162. 162
    PD77 says:

    We had Tory Boy, will we see Labour Lad now?

  163. 163
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    Someone mention pussy?

  164. 164
    Ewanme says:

    Coooeee .

    It’s “Chop a line now” , honey . Intro to “Cocaine Decisions” offa “The Man From Utopia”, babes .

    Coke is for morons an there’s plenty about .

    E x .

  165. 165
    Gordon McDoom says:

    I was quite ready to deliver my Leader’s speech and they told me to f*ck off. Would you believe it? Me being Prime Minister and all.

  166. 166
    The Other bloke says:

    Ed Milliband’s “new economic theory” on good private companies and bad private companies shows an astonishing similarity, nay, IDENTICAL structure to that postulated by the late German Reichschancellor, Herr Hitler, in his election speech of September 16 1930. The idea that capitalism and private property should continue, but be penalised if they were not in the interest of the State was pretty much Nazi philopsophy from then on. Even the coins were stamped “Gemeinnutz geht vor Eigennutz” after 1934.
    Herr Hitler also reminded his audiences that he was an outsider who had come to save everyone–just as Ed said.

  167. 167
    Skin bleach says:

    It don’t matter if you’re black or white.

  168. 168
    Anonymous says:

    He announced a policy about bad people asset stripping would be penalised.

    Though would that mean Boris being penalised for selling off Ken Livinstone’s wine cellar at City Hall or Ken for dinking it?

    Think its borrowed from the Common Agricultural Policy, taxpayer subsidy for inefficient companies that renders efficient companies out of business. Just as George Papadopolous’ speech today admitted. Subsidy led to Greece importing feta cheese and olive oil.

  169. 169
    Jon says:

    He announced a policy about bad people asset stripping would be penalised.

    Though would that mean Boris being penalised for selling off Ken Livinstone’s wine cellar at City Hall or Ken for dinking it?

    Think its borrowed from the Common Agricultural Policy, taxpayer subsidy for inefficient companies that renders efficient companies out of business. Just as George Papadopolous’ speech today admitted. Subsidy led to Greece importing feta cheese and olive oil.

  170. 170
    Mushroom Picker says:

    Bring on those dawn mists.

  171. 171
    Owlett says:

    >>Balls: Yes sir. Their country was invaded by German socialists and then by Russian socialists and consequently they tend to view political parties such as ours with a considerable degree of pertubation.

    Very good and very true. To dobrze!

  172. 172
    Georgios Theodolliplops says:

    Please buy Greek stuff. Many thanks.

  173. 173
    W.W. says:

    Remember what?


  174. 174
    grobdj says:

    I tell you this, comrades!

    Although I was there when Southern Cross was asset stripped, if I had known then what I know now, I WOULD HAVE done something about it!

    Whilst I knew Blair was negotiating the release of Al-Megrahi, I didn’t know that Gadaffi would be overthrown, otherwise I WOULD HAVE said it was not the RIGHT THING to DO.

    I say to you the BRITISH PEOPLE when I finally get around to a POLICY DECISION, I can assure you that I would NEVER implement it TOO FAR or TOO FAST


  175. 175
    Damien 666 Thompson says:

    How does it feel to have been barred from contributing to The Daily Telegraph comment/blogs section, Ewanme?

  176. 176
  177. 177
    Officer Crabtree says:

    Exactly. The government need to just get on with it and not worry about the media spin. When the changes take effect and thing imprve then the hollow protests of those on the left will seem childish and shrill.

    I kind of hope the unions do instigate a day of mayhem on the 30th November. In light of the recent riots, it would galvanise the average person against the Luddite, self-serving unions. It would also put the Labour Party on a sticky wicket; defend their fellow bruvas or chime with the majority in denouncing such thuggery.

    If we all pray really hard such events could lead to a schism in the left. The trade union variety going off to a Socialist Party and the Blairites as New Labour. It would keep them out of power forever as the only thing a socialist hates more than the right is any other part of the left.

  178. 178
    Ewanme says:

    Hiya Damien , darlin xx .

    a) Very liberatin

    b) How did ya know it woz me ???

    E x .

  179. 179
    misterned says:

    Cameron has made quite a lot of Conservative sounding speeches. I am just waiting for him to implement a conservative policy.

  180. 180
    Officer Crabtree says:

    Ed’ speech was to political oratory what Stephen Hawkins is to break-dancing,

  181. 181
    Colin says:

    Britsih democracy in action. UK energy policies dictated by half-wits.

    Ooh! What jolly fun!

  182. 182
    Damien 666 Thompson says:

    It was a wild guess on my part. Don’t worry, you are missing absolutely nothing but I will continue to post my important posts to you at the email address you supplied.

  183. 183
    BOB says:

    Strikes, Strikes, Strikes!

    Show who is in charge!!

    Go on my son Ed:)

  184. 184
    Mike Hunt says:

    What, even after the IMF and 25% inflation?

  185. 185
    Ewanme says:

    Oh .

    OK , honey . Can’t wait x .

    E x .

  186. 186
    rupert says:

    We’re quite simply fucked if this muppet gets anywhere near the levers of power; if there are any levers left that is.

  187. 187
    Union Leader living in a council flat says:

    We love you Miliband we do,

    We love you Miliband we do,

    We love you Miliband we do,

    Oh Miliband we love you!

    Red Ed 4 PM

    Red Ed 4 PM

  188. 188
    trooble at t'mill says:

    Kinnock didn’t look at all happy being pointed out as the Labour leader who condemned the militant tendency Labour council. Ed puts his foot in it even with his most ardent supporters. What a wanker.

  189. 189
    Anonymous says:

    Im not Tony Bliar.. Im not Gordon Doom.. Huh! Obama speech ..Im not George Bush.. have they only got one script writer ??? F F S

  190. 190

    See the polls.. She was well behind early on and only won a minor majority despite Labour’s utter incompetence.

  191. 191
    Super Dooper says:

    Hi, I’m Ed Miliband1

  192. 192
    Ed Miliband says:

    I’m not going to cock things up like Blair or Brown.
    I’m going to cock things up in an entirely new way.

  193. 193
    AC1 says:

    So why is that “nationalists who do not have the balls to vote for the only British party.” take votes from Marxists whereas UKIP takes votes from the Heathite party.

  194. 194
    AC1 says:

    >run the NHS, schools and economy.

    Government shouldn’t be in control of any of those 3. Which is precisely why this sick & thick country is getting poorer.

  195. 195
    AC1 says:

    That apply to Dave Heath too?

  196. 196
    Divide and Rule says:

    A good civil war in the Labour will get them in the low 20s.

  197. 197
    Officer Crabtree says:

    One the the great problems the left will have from Miliband’s speech is that he spoke in such vague terms that he has not really given the left a direction. Most people will I think agree that is was certainly more left-leaning than previous speeches but he still said some Blairite things.

    Due to his lack of any firm direction, detail or clue, he will allow the hard left and the centrists to both claim that he was speeking to them and so will ensue a fight for what Labour stand for.

    The left have immediately laid claim to his hard socialist undertones- a new way of doing thing which reject capitalism and the third way.

    The centrists will see his “undeserving poor” as a clear nod that Labour is not just there for the looney left and the dole bunnies.

    Ed Miliband has been Labour leader for a year now and has yet to define his direction. He is still playing at student politics instead of giving a clear vision, how that vision would be achieved and what it would mean for society. Whilst he continues to prevaricate the internal forces inside Labour are becoming more poisonous against each other.

    Rather than a break in the coalition government, I would not be surprised to see conflict within the Labour party. They have no leadership and no plan; the absence of these allow grubby little men to hatch plans to suit their own ends.

    Isn’t the whole spectacle just fucking delicious.

  198. 198
    AC1 says:

    When? I must’ve missed them.

  199. 199
    nell says:

    On a fancy yacht somewhere in the med near corfu perhaps?

  200. 200
    AC1 says:

    We can never afford to have a debt loving neo-classical endogenous growth theory believer.

  201. 201
    nell says:

    What’s really noticeable about the labour conference and miliband especially is how little interest it has aroused in the general population.

    If you were to take a news crew out into the streets of any city tomorrow morning and ask passers by what they thought of miliband’s speech – most would ask ‘ who’s miliband?’

  202. 202
    AC1 says:

    Noone wants the Zero anymore.

  203. 203
    Labours Boardwalk Empire says:

    John Smith presided over Monklands which was riven by religious sectarianism and was the blackest of Labour holes in the West of Scotland. He did nothing to clean it up. He was just another Lawyer on the make.

  204. 204
    Anonymous says:

    Although on R2 this afternoon
    “Events today.
    The Labour Party conference continues in Liverpool where they will be debating issues that they can’t control as they are not in government…. and no one cares”
    Patrick Kielty (standing in for Steve Wright in the afternoon, approx 29 mins in)
    Seriously off BBC message Patrick, collect your P45 on the way out!

  205. 205
    Princess Polytwaddle, her mouth full of silver spoons, talking down at people from her Ivory Tower says:

    I am always right!

    I am never wrong!

    And, returning from my evening repast, refreshed and re-energised by sparkling video-link conversation with Eddy babe and little Balls, I shall add that I simply cannot abide wasting my time trying to persuade people who should know better to understand the SocialShitist point of view.

    It is as plain as the palm of my hand that this is the Correct Way Of Thinking. I know this as a panjandrum and from my extensive study of the invaluable SocialShitist fund of writing and from my years of deep study that enables me to write such profound and pertinent pieces for the Grouniad, – a newspaper that I would heartily recommend to all, – and one that repays any amount of reading, – well it certainly pays me well!!

    And people have the effrontery to question why I live in my castle in Spain, – I mean in Italy, – a place that means very much to me, – well, it certainly cost a bomb!

    It is not some kind of perk or one-up-person-ship. It is an absolute rock-bottom essential that enables me to produce the calibre and quality of work to which my devoted readers have become accustomed. It is therefore as essential to any as my very latest laptop, my pen, and my servants.

    Now just go away and get on with your meagre, meaningless, and totally unsatisfactory lives!

  206. 206
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    I noticed that.

    Calling ‘troll’ and thanking some of the worst tribal CiFers for their ‘support’.

    Agree with Polly = support. Disagree with Polly = troll.

    A particularly pathetic and desperate response from one of the Gruan’s finest.

  207. 207
    No money required - it's a pleasure! says:

    No money required – it’s a pleasure!

    Besides which, – we’re not Socialist!


  208. 208
    AC1 says:

    You know, when you strike, If no-one notices any difference it’s worse than not striking…

    Go On Bob, show us how “key” these extorters really are…

  209. 209
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    You know Polly, you are exactly right.

    The left are just more intelligent, more caring and just generally better people.

    Thank you for opening my eyes to this indisputable fact.

  210. 210
    Gordon Brown says:

    I invented washing hands for nurses!

    And ordered that Wards should be cleaned!

    Cleanliness is quite important in Hospitals! Ithink it’s something to do with germs.

    They told me that when I went round to inspect them, – they said they had to get things clean where I went. But not where I didn’t.

  211. 211
    AC1 says:

    “Key workers” LAbours re-branding of the “more-equal”.

  212. 212
    AC1 says:

    OPM is the opium of the voters.

    Every election is a sort of advance auction sale of stolen goods.
    H. L. Mencken

  213. 213
    Harness the energy of her hands says:

    Me me me me me zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  214. 214
    Gordon Brown says:

    Um… Bob – wanking is all about STROKES – not STRIKES!

    Now go away and practice, – or hang about and I’ll show you..

  215. 215
    The East Is Not Red, It's Being Bled says:

    They need to also flush them out of their power bases in the corrupt and incompetently run Labour strongholds in local government. Time to send Scotland Yard into a few town halls and ask to see some evidence as to how the Labour Party’s councillors and their relatives have been able to amass their personal wealth. Start in Waltham Forest. The place reeks.

  216. 216
    Beard says:

    Shhhh…. There, there, my little soldier…

    now jump up on the rocking horse and drink your fizzy orange…

  217. 217
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    I feel even Professor Hawkins could deliver an improv speech with more fluency and feeling and a more varied range of facial expressions.

    No disrespect to Hawkins. He’s a great man.

  218. 218
    Shut That Door says:

    Well not off you, granted

  219. 219
    Ed, Ed, There's Something Not right in Your Head says:

    In his mind, taking on an equally over-privileged elder brother is the same as all the struggles and battling against unfairness anyone else will ever have to cope with in life.

  220. 220
    nell says:

    So labour has moved so far to the left even Marx would be surprised.

    I once upon a time did not like janetdaley, but her thoughtful, balanced views, such a contrast to polly twaddle’s screechings, are growing on me.

  221. 221
    nell says:

    To be quite honest I doubt he’ll get the chance.

  222. 222
    The battle against corruption is a fight for freedom, dignity and the rule of law says:

    If it’s as corrupted as Labour Led Waltham Forest, certainly.

  223. 223
    Anonymous says:

    I dont know about the General Public but his own cabinet looked bored to fuck throughout his speech

  224. 224
    Rolf says:

    Do you think I would leave you wanking
    when there’s room on my horse for two?

    Climb up here Bob we’ll soon be wanking
    I can cum just as fast with two.

  225. 225
    Jack Dromey (Ms) says:

    Huhne — principled? — you’re having a larf, Ernesto me old Parkinson’s-afflicted chum.

  226. 226
    nell says:

    Oh well there you go.

    I thought labour at least had one decent ‘leader’ that was cut off in his prime, that could have led them to clean and honest glory if only he’d had the chance.

    If you say he was just another foul scotsman who fed off the scottish labour mafia, then I have to believe you especially knowing what we now know about people like ffoullkes, brown, darling, whelan and the glaswegian council with it’s dr uggie le ader who was a pal of gordon’s.

  227. 227
    Rolf says:

    To be fair Nell, the three day week and garbage filled streets happened under Grocer Heath’s Conservative administration 1970-74.

  228. 228
    The Parliamentary Labour Party says:

    As long as it doesn’t involve anything to do with our party members actually obeying the rule of law.

  229. 229
    LOL says:

    “The industrialist praised by Labour Party leader Ed Miliband as “the true face of British business” in a speech that said the U.K. needs “not financial engineering, but real engineering” has just become a banker.”

    LOL !

  230. 230
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Toynbee and Daley are two cheeks of the same flabby arse.

  231. 231
    Fish says:

    A couple of UKIPpers were outside our local community centre demonstratiung against HS2.

    Both of the fuckers looked as if they’d already had post mortems.

  232. 232
    not a machine says:

    Was his speech wrttien by Johan Hari ?

    Buffet up his stake in tesco , 500mn price war breaks out and farmers worried they will be forced to pick up tab …….

  233. 233
    Gordon Brown says:

    I would definately shag him

  234. 234
    Nogbad the Bad says:

    It was like this in 1975. Everywhere. Both sides thought they were right, but in the end they fucked it up for themselves, each other and pretty much everyone else.,9171,917833-1,00.html

  235. 235
    Nogbad the Bad says:

    If you want honest news, watch RT.

  236. 236
    Fish says:

    Some people have just been jailed for 4 years for incitement

  237. 237
    This is how to do it says:

    IMO it was the best example of chutzpah I’ve yet seen from the ineffectual twerp and he’s got some competition in that respect from Balls et al.

    The worst aspect is that he believes he’s got a future.

  238. 238
    Nogbad the Bad says:

    Can’t she do something useful, like the dishes.

  239. 239
    This is how to do it says:

    What I want my mp or any mp to be:-


    Answer the question(s) as asked.

    Mix in and be aware of the real world that the majority of the population have to live in.

    Put the good of their consitutents to the fore instead of being an afterthought on a good day.

    Lay out clear concise plans to deal with:-

    EU Immigration Plethora of human rights, farce etc.


    Surely it’s not a lot to ask.

  240. 240
    Fish says:

    Wing Commander Farridge eh?. Chocs away old boy – watch those power cabl….

  241. 241
    Reimer says:

    Cover of current edition of Fabian Review shows Ed as a suited hurdler whizzing along. The written content is also asinine bollocks, about as compelling as an in-flight magazine. “Where the Left goes to think…”???

  242. 242
    This is how to do it says:

    V.g. jgm – I totally agree.

  243. 243
    nell says:

    Oh No! I don’t think so!

    If you want two cheeks that match you have to look at twaddle and brown or balls and mcbride or whelan and crow or uddin and bliar or sallyalley and sarahb…………….

  244. 244
    Hang The Bastards says:

    Just heard his speech…..


  245. 245
    nell says:


    “hurtling towards disaster …..” is the phrase that comes to mind…….

  246. 246
    nell says:

    Ok so militwit is against capitalists. against bankers. against industrialists and anyone who makes who makes a profit (except of course labour mp’s who make a profit out of their expenses!).

    So where is job creation going to come from?

  247. 247
    Grrr says:

    “New bargain?” Roosevelt he ain’t.

    “I’m my own man”. Perhaps more Frank Spencer then Roosevelt

  248. 248
  249. 249

    Talking about Cheeks and arses. What about The Bilderberg group, The EU, The Lib/Lab/Con The BBC. Numerous different arses but the same smelly shit coming out of all of them!!

  250. 250
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Too true, Nell.

    According to Iain Dale, though, our lords and masters at the BBC have sent about 150 journalists to cover it!

    I managed to watch Tony Blair’s Conference speeches. Hell, I even managed to sit through Gordon Brown’s. But it turns out that I just don’t hate myself enough to endure Ed Miliband’s 6th form oratory. I just couldn’t do it.

    Quite frankly, the massive spider that just scared the bejeezus out of me and made me squeal like a little girl has had more of an impact on my day than any Labour Conference bollocks.

    Long may it continue.

  251. 251
    nell says:

    Well let’s be fair. Poor sarah has had to leave gordon and flee to London because of his extreme behaviour.

    I just hope she took her boys with her.

  252. 252
    Reimer says:

    The mag has high production values (it should at a fiver a time…presumably most subscribers are in the upper end of the public sector’s institutions) but reads as little more than a bland NuLab cheerleading pamphlet, not some would-be-serious political journal on the Left. Mary Riddell interviews Chuka Muthafukka, God help us, feeding him opportunities to practice the deflecting of searching questions about the self-regarding bastard’s party with shite like “The future’s the thing, not the past” etc etc. He is clearly a man to watch – I wouldn’t trust the dishonest Hunt enough toturn the CCTV off.

  253. 253
    nell says:

    Ah dear old heath – he who took us into the EU!!

  254. 254
    Red Red mong faced cunt says:

    I had a fantastic day today, I said Millie Dowler 1000 times on TV, I’m very popular when I say Millie Dowler.

    My wife looks more like a boy than blinkey Balls one.

  255. 255
    Ed Milicock says:

    I am what I am
    I am my own special creation
    So come take a look
    Give me the hook
    Or the ovation
    It’s my world
    That I want to have a little pride
    My world
    And it’s not a place I have to hide in
    Life’s not worth a dam
    Till I can say
    I am what I am

  256. 256
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    I just want Sophy Ridge to strip off live on Sky

  257. 257
    nell says:

    Well Yes absolutely! Spiders are the real issue this Autumn. They’ve had perfect breeding conditions this year and are the biggest ever. We had one over our stairs that was so big we could see it’s eyes!!

    Did you know that conkers deter them. So go out there and find a conker tree. Collect conkers into a basket. Put them in the house and you’ll keep spiders at bay!!

    Pity we can”t do the same with labour!!

  258. 258
    Gasser says:

    After serious consideration.

    Flackpool Rock. ROCKS!

  259. 259
    nell says:

    One last thought for the night.

    Is twatson still worse for wear and busking with his ‘stolen’ guitar on the streets of liverpool?

    If so , anyone out there, please give him your loose coins for a cup of tea – he is after all a ‘poor’ labour mp who has troughed away more the £100k in expenses and is still claiming year on year!!

    Whilst you are giving him money, just a thought – This is is the labour party that is trying to persuade you to re-elect them to goverment on the basis that they are economically competent!!!!

  260. 260
    Anonymous says:

    The East is Not Red said: ” Start in Waltham Forest. ”

    Then carry on to Newham. A corrupt Labour shitehole.

  261. 261
    Red Ed's Bed Head says:

    Well, well… He’s seems to have scared you lot totally sh+tless.

  262. 262
    Colin the Meek says:

    I do not understand why this comment has not received the plaudits it deserves.

    Bravo etc.

  263. 263
    Aldo says:

    Labour have never ‘knifed’ a leader so it’s safe to say the job is his until 2015. We’re looking at a three figure tory majority, labour pulverised and the limp dems wiped out. I can hardly wait….

  264. 264
    Traditionalist says:

    Watson to Brillo: “mediocrity in Parliament is not for me”.What a hoon!

  265. 265
    Mascarpone, I scream says:

    FAO Beeboids, journalists, socialists, slebs, Janet Daley, and other economically illiterate fucktards (i.e. seemingly everyone).

    Wealth is not money.

    Creating wealth means creating goods and services that people want (or creating the means to do so). It does not mean creating money.

    Even socialist parasites can create money by printing it. Socialist parasites cannot create wealth (except, that is, by making a video of themselves being ritually disembowelled, for example).

    If you configure a few computers and turn them into a business worth £10 billion, then you have created £10 billion worth of wealth. You have not created any money.

    People 300 years ago were not poorer because they had less money. They were poorer because they had less stuff, and their stuff was crap. They had crap stuff because they didn’t know how to make better stuff. They had less stuff because they didn’t even know how to make crap stuff efficiently. Progress in these matters was slow largely because the organised parasites of the time were less restrained than they are today.


    Wealth is not money.

    Creating wealth means creating goods and services that people want (or creating the means to do so). It does not mean creating money.

    When you pathetically attempt to seem “grown-up” by bandying about terms relating to concepts beyond your primary school level of understanding, like “the economy”, “exchange rates”, “GDP”, “trade deficit”, “financial services”, “interest rates”, “fractional reserve banking”, etc, etc, etc, it quickly becomes apparent that you are utterly confused by your ignorance of the basic, obvious fact that wealth is not money, and are therefore a fucking idiot.

    So next time you excrete an article for the Telegraph or a propaganda piece for the state broadcaster, please ask yourself: Am I a fucking idiot who confuses wealth and money? Rewrite until the distinction is clear.

    Message ends.

  266. 266
    Spartacus says:

    Agreed, it is sad to know they are they only credible alternative to the ‘lick europe’s arse’ parties.

  267. 267
    Another Engineer. says:

    Burying him on Iona was a huge insult to the history of Scotland.

    Sadly the stupid f*ckers couldn’t see it.

    28 Scottish Kings, 8 Norwegian Kings, 4 Irish Kings and a dodgy lawyer from Argyll.

    Jesus H.

  268. 268
    albacore says:

    “The governments don’t rule the world. [Investment bank] Goldman Sachs rules the world.”
    “Trader was not a hoaxer, says BBC”
    Meanwhile, the show must go on. Clegg and Miliband have done their party pieces and left us laughing. Dave’s on next.

  269. 269
    The Cabinet Secretary says:

    Well we’ve got the 0% growth.

  270. 270
    The Cabinet Secretary says:

    It’s called ‘Komment macht Frei’ now. Keep up.

  271. 271
    The Cabinet Secretary says:

    There may be an element of truth in her allegations. They banned me for trashing her.

  272. 272
    The Cabinet Secretary says:

    …or missed dawns.

  273. 273
    Tosser Watch says:

    You’re a tosser.

  274. 274
    smoggie says:

    I’ve got to say, anyone who get up out of an airplane crash, give his head a shake and ask if his G&T was spilt has got to be admired.

  275. 275
    Charlie Kennedy says:

    He was an alky, like me.

  276. 276
    mitch says:

    Looks like Ed doesn’t want the job of PM and is prepeared to go to any lengths to avoid winning.
    Getting a 12 yr old to write his speech was a master stroke.

  277. 277
    Eva de Baler says:

    Ed certainly needs working out – like a constipated turd.

  278. 278
    Google translate says:

    Gemeinnutz geht vor Eigennutz = Public need before private greed

  279. 279
    Google translate says:

    Nothing to do with the fact that Albanians and the folk of FYROM work cheaper, then?

  280. 280
    Ed (Bernie Winters) is weird says:

    He’s not the same without Schnorbitz. Bring back hid brother, aka Count Arthur Strong.

  281. 281
    Sally Bercow says:


  282. 282
    Jumbo says:

    And when the Liblabs have theirs it’ll be a season of yellow fruitlessness

  283. 283
    Michael Foot Redux says:

    No party espousing a radical left wing policy has ever been/will ever be elected to government in the United Kingdom……and I should know…..the floating voter i.e. people who decide elections run as far as they can from such ideas/policies…for all his faults Blair knew that and that why New Labour was created….Miliband may be the darling of the conference and Labour Party loyalists but he’s just screwed any chance of being elected as PM

  284. 284
    Fabians are Evil says:

    So the little bastard is a liar – that should make him a future Labour star!

  285. 285
    Mrs Havisham says:

    Blair was brilliant at politics, that is brilliant at getting power, but his intellect and the ideas that came from it, were superficial and short term. I think it will be seen in time (in fact, can be seen now, that nowhere in British politics is there a bigger downfall than Blair’s). It is not just thast Blair lost power, it is that he is entirely distrusted and discredited. Sure he won elections but he won them agaisnt a divided and unappealing opposition. I am not a Labour voter but to me the reaction to Ed’s speech from the right reek of hysteria and fear. In times of mass unemployment and massive financial pressures throughout the world, it is inevitable that there will be interest in leftist ‘solutions’. If the right really want to see this off they should be talking regulation of the banking system, strictly enforced control of unskilled immigration, provinding high quality vocational education etc., not knee jerk ‘reds in beds’ reactions.

  286. 286
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    If Seamus Milne liked it then the speech must have been so far left to be completely barking. Milne is a tw*t of the highet order but then his Dad was D-G of the BBC so it must run in the family. Strange that Winchester didn’t knock the infantile SWP tendencies out of him

  287. 287
    misterned says:

    BBC breakfast this morning are already doing a re-write. Ben Brown was on saying, “What Miliband really meant was…”

    Making out that this was not a massive lurch to the left or a clarion call for state interference and moralising.


  288. 288
    smoggie says:

    Not bad. My old dad told me that the amount of money in circulation should mirror the amount of wealth. Printing more money does not create more wealth it simply reduces the value of the units of money. Which is why you need more units to buy the same thing – inflation.

  289. 289
    Michael Foot Redux says:

    What a surprise,,,, I liked what his mother said…”Rory is a very good actor !” The lad should go far in the Labour Party………..
    Meanwhile Militwit takes to the airwaves in a despeate attempt to try and limit damage caused by his speech and denies that he is anti-business…”Look I can only set ou what I belive is the way forawrd and what needs to change in the way we do business….of course people are scared…change is scary…but ultimately it is up to THE British people to decide if they agree …or not……”….oh dear lewass that 24 hours and its all going er slightly wrong for Ed

  290. 290
    Been out and about says:

    Well who would have guessed such a nice lad turning out to be such a lieing little shit, his school report should now read, will do well as politician or car salesman or working for the local council, his family must be so proud of him.

  291. 291
    Mickey Smithson says:

    As an insurance provider my aim was to give clients the best possible service,

    But a woman came asking to insure her husbands penis because she thinks it’s the biggest she’s ever seen.

    I got fired for pulling down my pants and saying ‘Go Compare!’

  292. 292
    lucky us says:

    I am no Tony Blair….. thank god for that – dont want another person like Tony who can win 3 elections in a row on the labour benches…..

    The two eds seem to talk down the UK economy – at the last crisis the opposition stood shoulder to shoulder with the gov and its difficult decisions – now it seems the gov on wrong path in all it does ?

  293. 293
    Anonymous says:

    Oh come now Ed is in the wrong job but he’s not making any decisions whereas Cameron and Osborne are and they are just as big plonkers.

  294. 294

    He’s not Neil Kinnock –
    He’s Michael Foot in disguise !

  295. 295
    Wot Ed really meant, c/o the BBC's unofficial spokesperson says:

    It is our job as State Broadcaster to interpret Mr. Miliband’s speech for the proles’ and to tell you – in your gangsta’esque street language – what he really meant.
    Now shut up, pay attention and your license fee.

    Those responsible for causing the outage yesterday during the great one’s speech will be dealt with by firing squad.

    Long live LABOUR!

    Thank you for your money.

  296. 296
    Wot Ed really meant, c/o the BBC's unofficial spokesperson says:

    Ed is wonderful – we will be running a 6 part mini-series on this and why anybody that has right of centre views eats babies and kills kittens.
    Once we’ve finished, the Labour faithful would vote a monkey’s foreskin as Labour leader… oh wait …..

    Anyway, time to corrupt Newsround and Jackanory with anti-tory propaganda.

    Thank you for your money.

  297. 297
    Keep It Simple, (very simple) says:

    Labour strategy – keep people poor and ignorant so you keep client base. If not enough poor people, import a shit load from 3rd world country’s around the planet.

  298. 298
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Ed Balls bitched and whined that Osbo and iDave were talking down the economy when he was in government. In Opposition he spends his time doing nothing else. Further proof (not that any is needed) that the man is a devious, hypocritical little cnut.

  299. 299
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Typical labour. He has only followed the example of Blair, Brown, Ed Miliband, Ed Balls, Harman, et al.
    Labour the party of liars.

  300. 300
    Michael Foot Redux says:

    With about the same effect on voters I suspect….the 1983 Labour Manifesto was not dubbed “The longest suicide note in history” for nothing ….at least he’s not taken to wearing a “Donkey Jacket” and sporting a CND badge(YET)

  301. 301
    Raving Loon says:

    I wouldn’t celebrate Blair too much, he’s a war criminal. If he were the leader of a non-european/anglo-saxon nation he would be on trial now.

  302. 302
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Labours new slogan “Do as we say not as we do”.

  303. 303
    Merde she wrote says:

    Milliband could be a turd on a stick and he would poll 35 to 40%.

    Could be?

  304. 304
    I don't need no doctor says:

    In the style of Kinnock at Sheffield “Well all left, well all left”

  305. 305
    I don't need no doctor says:

    So why has Ed Miliband stolen the phone hacking glory from Tom Watson. The way Miliband spoke yesterday you would have thought it was his own work.

  306. 306
    The Other bloke says:

    No, that slack-jawed, eye-unfocused, lolling tongue look is deep concentration on the part of people who are hard-pressed to compehend the economic complexities of a whelk stall.

  307. 307
    The Other bloke says:

    Having seen the dismal performances of Labour “shadow” ministers and “experts” this week in various TV interviews, it would be a fun and telling exercise if anyone seeking office could sit a simple envigilated examination to encompass basic general knowledge, British history and “O-level” economics—say, at the level of a 16 year old.

  308. 308
    JH says:

    I need the subscription list of that magazine, a wall, and an MG42 please.

  309. 309
    Figure of Hate says:

    Would that make you a slapper?

  310. 310
    The Other bloke says:

    I just received this email.

    “We have received a number of complaints about the comment you made on article “Rory Weal: Child star of the Labour conference and the truth behind his ‘life of poverty’ ” (, 28/09/2011 at 08:08.Due to the number of complaints received, your comment has been removed from MailOnline.
    Should the situation change, we will review and consider re-publishing. Until such time, your comment will remain off the site. To avoid this happening again, please take the time to review the House Rules and site Terms and Conditions”

    The comment, without any epithets or insults suggested that Labour Goons has made a 16 year old into a liar. Something that would come back to haunt him in twenty years time. Now even the Daily Maildefends Labourspeak!

  311. 311
    Kev says:

    Surely he would do what Daddy espoused, shoot the plebs who vote the wrong way??

  312. 312
    The Observer says:

    I am truly disappointed that the BBC did not show or give a soundbite on the ecstatic elation to Tony Blair at previous Labour meetings, as an antidote to his vilification at Liverpool.
    Patten needs to come out from under his rock though the story about his dismissal of the editor of the Oxford Times in the past does raise serious doubts as to his ability to head the BBC Trust.

  313. 313
    Justice live on telly says:

    If the glove don’t fit you must acquit. Or something.

  314. 314
    Stuffed Teddy says:

    No way! Labour clearly appointed a man who wouldn’t get in the way of the progressives/commies/union-lovers and their bid for control. As he has no idea what’s happening he’s the best man to lead the party, providing he doesn’t look over his shoulder…

  315. 315
    Fur flying says:

    A love triangle? Him, her and the kitten? Oooh… I’ll fetch the popcorn.

  316. 316
    Winston S says:

    German socialists? Steady on old chap… we can’t have that sort of talk. Can’t have the labour voters ever thinking that nasty man Adolf was, um, one of us.

    Try to spin it that they were somehow against socialism… devil of a job persuading them to vote our way if the truth gets out, what?

  317. 317
    We'll all have tea says:

    i believe she puts the kettle on.

  318. 318
    Talk talk says:

    Blair goes off, after being in charge of declaring war, and makes a mint from speaking engagements.

    Broon, having p*ssed up the economy, goes off on lecture tours and personally makes loadsamoney.

    Will Ed follow in their footsteps?

Seen Elsewhere

Time We Showed Super Rich Some Love | Alice Thomson
We Need True Popular Capitalism | Maurice Saatchi
Labour’s Winning Hand | Sebastian Shakespeare
We Defend Labour’s Record | John Hutton and Alan Milburn
100 Tories to Rebel on Plain Packs | Telegraph
May 2015 and the Art of Political Betting | MAY2015
Fate of Eurozone Rests in Hands of Videogame Expert | TechnoGuido
UKIP After Farage | Asa Bennett
Eichmann Called on Arabs to Continue War on Jews | Speccie
Mirror Hacking: 50 Legal Action Claims | Press Gazette
Mandy’s £400,000 Tax-Free Loan From Own Company | Guardian

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Alan Milburn says Labour’s scaremongering campaign for an unreformed NHS will not win election…

“It would be a fatal mistake, in my view, for Labour to go into this election looking as though it is the party that would better resource the National Health Service but not necessarily put its foot to the floor when it comes to reforming. Look, reforms are not easy, but the Labour Party is not a conservative party. It should be about moving things forward not preserving them in aspic. You have got a pale imitation actually of the 1992 general election campaign, and maybe it will have the same outcome. I don’t know.”

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