There are many reasons why the NHS is not the “envy of the world”, but Guido reckons they could have tried a little harder with their token celebrity endorsement for the NHS’s 63rd birthday today. Step forward Ozzy Osbourne. The ageing rocker sings the praises of the organisation, though he seems to have changed his tune from his last public utterances on a medical theme. In 2005 he famously told a crowd in Michigan that he’d been warned not to sing, but “the doctor can go f**k himself”.

Things have been little uncomfortable for Lansley in recent months, but Guido had no idea things were that desperate at Richmond House…