June 15th, 2011

+ + + Northern Rock is on the Block + + +


  1. 1
    Dick the Prick says:

    Hmmm…..depends on the price

  2. 2
    Martin Day says:

    Fuckin ell!

  3. 3
    Ed Balls, Shallow Chancer says:

    Get Ed’s cock on the block !

  4. 4
    MAD FRANKIE LAZOON son of ZOD says:

    2nd always the bridesmaid

  5. 5
    Up sh1t creek says:

    On Sky News earlier today, the UK’s newest bank “Metro Bank” was asked if they would consider buying some of the assets of Northern Crook. They said they did not want to touch those damaged goods.

    Someone with common sense, and speaking the truth.

  6. 6
    LulzSec says:

    Virgin Rock… Now there’s a place I’d visit

  7. 7
    fron spain says:

    sorry o/t
    just gone on to McMillan to cancel my subscription page is down wonder why.

  8. 8
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Not the case Guido
    according to sky
    If we get a Billion for it we are still out of pocket by £400,000,000
    But the gov still hold all the mortgages ,which are making a return
    so over time as these are paid off we will break even

  9. 9
    Alan Philip Bonggg says:

    I was in Scotland recently and visited an RBS cashpoint. Felt a bit miffed that |I had to pay for the withdrawal as it was my money!

  10. 10
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    I wonder what Good Cause, Dave “Kid in a sweet shop” has found that he wants to waste a billion on this time ?

  11. 11
    Postal Vote says:

    It must be a great bank, because it’s from Newcastle where labour rule has helped to get 35% of the workforce employed in the public sector!

    And they are very good at postal voting over there too …

  12. 12
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Ball;s has just had to sit and take the Govenor of the Bank of England trash Ball’s time in the Treasury -priceless!

  13. 13
    Gonk says:

    Urgent emergency maintenance.
    A glitch appeared about midday.

  14. 14
    Down With Brown! says:

    Sell off the rest too. The banks should never have been bailed out.

  15. 15
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Oona C u n t on Sky News spouting shit and boy is she fucking ugly.

  16. 16
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today I am an obtuse trangle

  17. 17
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    I wouldn’t give shit to any charity (other than the RNLI) they are all crooks. Fuck them all.

  18. 18
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today I am an obtuse triangle

  19. 19
    Fred the Shred ( knighted by Gordon Brown ) says:

    You Southern softies have to pay my pension !!!

  20. 20
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    The BBC will not be happy with Merv the swerv trashing the testicles man and his big spending.

    Expect to see Toenails and Huntsberg try to spin it tonight on the BBC news and then Newsnight will have Red Paul Mason spouting hisa Commie crap.

  21. 21
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Exactly, should have gone to the wall.

  22. 22
    nell says:

    Apparently there are offers in for MORE THAN £1billion.

    Time to get rid of labour’s expensive mistakes.

  23. 23
    Keith Chegwin says:


    Does anyone know anything about a senior Orthopaedic Surgeon at Addenbrooke’s Hospital giving Cameron some stick with both barrels in last few days ?

  24. 24
    Engineer says:

    For Sale; One Bank. One careful owner – the rest were lunatics.

  25. 25
    hmmmm says:

    I bid 57p and a stick of rock and a catapult ( might be useful for Libya).

  26. 26
    nell says:

    gordon was better at it!

    funding fredtheshred pensions and purchasing failed scottish banks for £billions and then making darling sign legally binding pledges for even more eu £billions just hours before he left office in the hope that would get him the imf job!!

  27. 27
    Lakshmi Mittal says:

    What do you buy for the man who has everything?

  28. 28
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Yes it was on the news last night Call me Daves photo opp went tits up when he came in and saw all the press in their dirty scruffs
    he went ape and told them to get out !

    really funny !

  29. 29
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Can I just ask (and please forgive my ignorance in this respect), but why is Nick Robinson called “Toenails”?

  30. 30
    Engineer says:

    Just as a matter of passing interest – can anyone explain why Northern Rock was nationalised, but Bradford and Bingley was allowed to go bust?

  31. 31
    Down With Brown! says:

    He’s so far up Labour’s arse that’s all you can see.

  32. 32
  33. 33
  34. 34
    Anonymous says:


  35. 35
    Down With Brown! says:

    Any video of this?

  36. 36
    annette curton says:

    We were just being polite.

  37. 37
    Engineer says:

    He earned the moniker during the dark days of the Brown Terror, because he was so far up Gordon’s [deleted] that his toenails were all that anyone could usually see of him.

  38. 38
    Madness says:

    Seems a bit early to me. Why the rush? What does he know that we don’t.

  39. 39
    Had all sorts says:

    black women never age well.

  40. 40
    Eeu to me says:

    Bloody hell that’s a lot of money, besides he will have already passed it on to one of his mates for 10p , asset stripping should only take a few months and the carcase will provide a lot lot more in selling off the property.

  41. 41
    Martin Day says:

    The head of Tony B Liar?

  42. 42
    Gordon Brown says:

    I did a fine job as chancellor. If I was still prime minister, there would be no deficit.

  43. 43
    Left with the crap says:

    who’s going to buy the bad bits? The taxpayer will still get lumbered with the crap when they were lending 5x salary 120% mortgages to unemployed people who self-certified their income at 150k!

  44. 44
    DAVE call me fucking embarrassedCAMERON says:

    Make sure he never works in this town again !

  45. 45
    annette curton says:

    Something to do with Labour MPs constituencies?.

  46. 46
    Eeu to me says:

    Now where was it’s Head office, dahn south or oop north east ,now figure out where Liebour gets it’s support.

  47. 47
    nell says:

    that’ll be da vid*nu nn the pal of alanm il burn then.

    think it’s a bit rich calling him a top orthopaedic consultant though especially since he has ‘previous’ in these sort of anger outbursts.

    he’s a medical , nokia throwing gordon.

    not exactly the sort of consultant you’d want at your bedside

  48. 48
    nell says:

    Well Eng. I presume you were talking about the solid dependable old Lloyds before gordon corrupted the management into taking on toxic debt with promises of lordships!

  49. 49
    Gormless Ed says:

    What deficit?

  50. 50
    Ed Balls, Shallow Chancer says:

    I believe they were both nationalised.

    Shareholders got rogered though. It all started in America and was nothing to do with Adam Applegarth’s 125% mortgages nor Bradford & Bingley’s buy-to-let liar loans.

  51. 51
    Keith Chegwin says:

    He’s exactly the sort of Consultant that I’d want to protect me on an NHS ward as he takes no sh1t & looks after his patients. His ‘previous’ was highlighting the fact that many of his professional colleagues couldn’t understand English.

  52. 52
    nell says:

    “Was” Eng?

    He’s still there!

  53. 53
    Engineer says:

    B&B wasn’t nationalised, it was allowed to fail, and the small shareholders got precisely zilch. The loan and deposit book was transferred to Santander.

  54. 54
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Thanks for the clarification (although that’s not an image I wanted to take to bed with me – I shall have to concentrate doubly-hard on Louise Bagshawe tonight) I shall henceforth use his moniker with abandon and barely-concealed glee!

  55. 55
    nell says:

    Just realised what gordon’s next job will be.

    ceo of the rbs!

  56. 56
    Gonk says:

    Dear Northern Rock,
    I’m a 59 year old offal worker with one lung
    and a psychopathic wife. Can I borrow 200 grand
    for a coastal apartment in Libya with a mineshaft
    in the back garden and a pack of Bedouin in the front ?
    I can. That’s great. Thanks.

  57. 57
    Oh my god, they killed Kenny! says:

    South Park is quite remarkable. It’s a hilarious, foul mouthed, irreverent cartoon that’s also liberatarian and conservative. Just watched hilarious episode that completly ripped the piss out of the anti smoking lobby.

  58. 58
    Engineer says:

    There would probably be no economy either. Just a sign stuck over the former Treasury’s brass plaque saying, “IMF. Please knock and await our convenience.”

  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    Halle Berry??

  60. 60
    nell says:

    You and your bagman bullyballs were the absolute finest example of failed labour fiscal policy the UK has ever had!!

    Be Proud!!!!

  61. 61
    Martin Day says:

    Get in there Edward Miliband !!!!!

    Latest YouGov/Sun results 15th June CON 36%, LAB 42%, LD 9%;

    APPROVAL -29

  62. 62
    tris says:

    You don’t have to pay for withdrawals from RBS unless your own bank was charging you.

  63. 63

    Northern Rock,who gives a gnat’s chuff what they do with it.
    We the taxpayers were ripped off big time to bail this crowd out and the other bankster financial terrorists.
    McBust adopted a policy of leave well alone I don’t care what happens as long as I am able to pursue my my my policy as a liebour spendaholic.
    As history now tells us and more to the point we are now hit with the policies of liebour profligacy in spending our money with no regard as to what this could lead to.
    Well folks we are right now facing the truth of what this liebour lot have done to this country.
    This country is in a state flux in that opinions are with this set of politico’s or the other,just when are we going to see politico’s really concerning themselves with the advancement of this country rather than their personal advancement and political fortunes.
    Completely O/T,I watched today some clips of what the EUSSR are about,it would seem to me that we do have quite a number of British voices taking the EUSSR to task.
    There are things going on amongst this lot of commies that need to be exposed.
    Hopefully people reading this will take the time to have a look at what the agenda is from this unelected by people lot is.

  64. 64
    Hugh Janus says:

    We need the cash. Splashing the wonga around the world is costing us an absolute fortune. Who could deny India its space programme and aircraft carrier? Or the bailouts currently costing us £9bn and rising fast?

    Our own eye-watering deficit is well down the list

  65. 65
    Ed Cooper-Balls says:


    *sticks fingers in ears* La la la la la la la …. I can’t hear you …. la la la la la la

    Too fast, too deep. Tory-led Government. Progressive.

    I’m off home to let Yvette bum me with her strapon (at least I think it’s a strapon – (s)he insists on blindfolding me) until my eyes pop out.

  66. 66
    The Sentinal says:

    BBC (Break Britian Completely) had Darling on all day saying he was now exonerated of saving Northern Rock.
    He and they forget that anyone who has a brain knew it was political and that the Labour Party were trying to save their northern supporters.
    The BBC over at least two years constantly promoted Northern Rock on their Money Programme as offering the best interest rates, all without any investigation until the house of cards fell.
    They never even investigated RBS Dutch adventure because their Labour cohorts said it was OK.
    Now Labour are out the BBC are investigating (badly) PPP and show what a robbery to the country it is. They just need to read the last 8 years Private Eye (as should the government) – you could not make it up.

  67. 67
    Anonymous says:

    An ‘ i ‘ would knock you into shape

  68. 68
    Ed Balls, Shallow Chancer says:

    But Gordon told me he had saved the World ???

  69. 69
    nell says:


    populus poll “who do you trust to run the economy?”

    cameron/osborne/clegg – 41%
    miliband/balls – 23%

  70. 70
    Ed Balls, Shallow Chancer says:

  71. 71
    annette curton says:

    Or to put it another way, Coalition Government 45% – Labour Opposition 42%… approval + 3.

  72. 72
    Northern Rock (aka Infuriated of West Mids) says:

    Better than that – we’ll give you 120% on it. You can have a whole £40,000 *free*!!! Your house can only go up in value!!! What could possibly go wrong, you ill-educated, low-income earning, shit-for-brains.

    I did my articles in conveyancing (yawn) about 6 years ago, and I swear that one in 10 mortgage offers that came across my desk weren’t far off the above. It’s no wonder we are where we are.

  73. 73
    nell says:

    rather depends whether the operation he did on you was a success or a failure doesn’t it?!

  74. 74
    Madness says:

    Just a prick trying to make a name for himself. The ward nurses told the cameramen that as they were not coming into direct contact with patients what they wearing was fine.

  75. 75
    hmmmm says:

    A clear demonstration of Labours failed education policy.

    Dave – stop foreign aid +10%
    Outlaw unions + 5%
    Stop imigration + 5%
    Outlaw the HSE
    Dont worry about a referendum just pull out of Europe now +25%

    Sod Glegs lossers – Let the Tory in you out

  76. 76
    Hadrian says:

    Don’t want any of them near my Wall.

  77. 77
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    I notice the BBC are bigging up the story that Osborne wants to flog off Northern Crock now when the market isn’t that great, BUT where was the BBC when the one eyed twat from Fife flogged off our gold at rock bottom prices?

  78. 78
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    What scares me is that nearly a quarter of the people in my country are complete fuckwits.

    Statistically, that means at least 1 person in my family.

    *looks around suspiciously*

  79. 79
    Harris Tottle says:

    BREAKING NEWS ——————-
    MyLongPole (Never been wrong yet!) Call me Dave 100%. Milipuddle: 0%.

    However, I did once know a man that voted Labour, but he was prone to walk up & down the street shouting about how he fancied little Nell, so the village ignored him.

  80. 80
    The Sentinal says:

    I think you will find his previous was over foreign nurses not understanding his instructions.

  81. 81
    Harridan Harmanhater says:

    Go away, Fartin. Come back in May 2015 when I will be Liebour leder.

  82. 82
    I says:

    Libyan regime stripped of Olympic tickets.

    That ‘ll show ‘em

  83. 83
    Mike Hobday says:

    I categorically deny that I am in any way biased! That is a serious slur!

    Must dash. Having dinner with Derek Draper.

  84. 84
    Fuck 'em all says:

    400 million out of pocket?

    They pumped in 3.4 billion.

    The Treasury is preparing to convert up to £3 billion of government loans to the Rock and £400 million of Rock preference shares into ordinary Rock shares.


  85. 85
    annette curton says:

    Statistics can be funny things, its still quite possible that all of the people in your family are complete fuckwits and indeed the entire population of the West Midlands.

  86. 86
    nell says:

    Doesn’t exactly give you confidence in the man does it ? to know that he throws tantrums in the operating theatre whilst he’s operating on some poor patient!!

  87. 87
    I says:

    When asked “how many letters are there in the alphabet”, there were 90% don’t knows

  88. 88
    retardEd Miliband says:

    Yeth! I am thuperb!

    Do you want to thee my blank theet of paper?

  89. 89
    New Model Army says:

    You really must get out more.
    The percentage is more than 35%

  90. 90
    nell says:

    Hear mcbride was chuffed that you followed his advice and is stumping up for the champagne!

  91. 91
    Another fuck up, £400m loss to tax payers says:

    According to sources close to the chancellor, he opted for an outright sale because he was advised by UKFI and Deutsche that this would raise twice as much for taxpayers as a flotation or mutualisation.

    However if Northern Rock were sold for around £1bn, that would represent a small loss for taxpayers on the £1.4bn injected into the bank in early 2010 by the Exchequer.

  92. 92
    nell says:

    Tickets have been given to mandy instead so that he can distribute them to his libyan friends through nat r@o@th@schild.

    He’ll be shipping them in on his personal yacht!

  93. 93
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Why do people think Paxman is a good interviewer? He’s twat.

    He’s so predictable, he’s just asked Billy Hague why ‘we’ (he means the Brits) are not kicking Syria’s arse. Billy rightly stated that it’s up to the UN to take these decisions.

    Now if the UK were bombing Syria without a UN resolution Paxman would be demanding to know why the UK thinks it can act outside of international law.

    Now he’s asking Billy about how much the war in Libya is costing, why would Billy know that? That’s the MoD or Chancellor not the Foreign Office, Paxman knows that, so what is the point of asking?

    It’s just shit, Paxman you are a mong

  94. 94
    Teacher of remedial English says:

    Past tense of “know” is “knew”.

    Your state education cost the taxpayer £120,000. Let’s see a return on that ‘investment’.

  95. 95
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    All thanks to Gordon Brown. I’m fed up with the BBC giving the one eyed shirt lifter a free pass.

    I bought my house in 1995 under the Tories, not only did I have to squeeze blood from a stone to get a 2.5X mortgage on a small house AND have a good deposit I had to supply a pile of proof about earnings including a letter from my employer.

    So tell me BBC twats, what happened after 1995? say in 1997 perhaps?

  96. 96
    Mr Nice says:

    Paxman’s also very old and not far from death.

  97. 97
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    You’ve clearly visited!

    I’d better go to bed and leave the spare key under the doormat, as usual. I’m sure that decorative nightlight will burn itself out just fine ….

  98. 98
    Man on the Clapham Omnibus says:

    Fucking great.

    Can we flog our infinitely larger stake in Lloyds and RBS while we’re at it?

  99. 99
    David Laws Lib Dem fiddler says:

    With another financial crisis about to hit who would want to buy it?? Look out for your money Greece will set things in motion, watch everyone run for cover. No central bank has enough money to cover all bets.

  100. 100
    Wile E. Coli says:

    Or “did know”. And you are a complete and utter f’ucking c’unt.

    No offence.

  101. 101
    monkey dick says:

    …or didnt have the courage to tell them otherwise…

  102. 102
    monkey dick says:

    It was brilliant :o)

  103. 103
    Beauty watch says:

    Who was the absolute goddess presenting sports news on Sky news a moment ago?

  104. 104
    Lying c unt watch says:

    Your talking shite, RBS cash points are free. Where was this ?

  105. 105
    Oh my god, they killed Kenny! says:

    There was a great episode about the climate change lobby. A green activist tried to hypnotise the kids with “Republicans cause global warming. Republicans are evil. They want to destroy the world”.

  106. 106
    Anonymous says:

    You mean the old reliable Scottish TSB before those barrow boy spivs from Lloyds got involved.

  107. 107
    Adam Collyer says:

    I think you’re forgetting the £27 billion they lent the “bad bank” part of it.

  108. 108
    Phwoooar! says:

    Elizabeth Day on Sky news paper review.

  109. 109
    Ed But Look Balls says:

    Jugged-Hare Marr was called ‘Further’ because he was further up than Toenails !!

  110. 110
    The crime that dare not speak it's name says:

    The scale of mortgage fraud that has proliferated this past 10years would take your breath away. The Banks and building societies don’t won’t you to know about what has been going on but it’s massive. Organised criminals make more from this than drug dealing.

  111. 111
    Phwoooar! says:

  112. 112
    A Greek says:

    I give you ₯100,000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 Drachma for it?

  113. 113

    What the feck is wrong with your keyboard ?

  114. 114
    Rufus T. Firefly says:

    To paraphrase Mark Twain, ” There are lies, damned lies, statistics and Brown/Balls statistics”

  115. 115
    Gerry Mandering says:

    You’ve never gone over at Barclays then! £0.01 over your unrequested Personal Reserve and they’ll charge you £20 up to 4 times in the month.

    When you challenge, the Banks say they are legally justified – they won at court – extracting this amount of cash cos its “their” £0.01 you are using.

    Cityunslicker recons it will get worse.

    Never borrow. Save as much as you can. Cash is getting tight as its sucked over to the PIIGS.

  116. 116
    Kerr Ching says:

    He also conveniently forgot to mention his own mortgage.

  117. 117
    Anonymous says:

    Anyone given a thought to the original shareholders in NR (many of them “normal people”) who were forcibly evicted by the Govt – shouldn’t they be recompensed ?

  118. 118
    scratch and sniff says:

    or had been slipped a couple of twenties – no-one need know

  119. 119
    scratch and sniff says:

    she’s got more than a touch of the nadine dorries about her – I’d like to give a large portion of “advice”

  120. 120
    Jurgen Alykdis says:

    Yew muss bee knew ear.

  121. 121
    Jurgen Alykdis says:

    Cathy Ashton.

  122. 122
    Fishy On A Dishy says:

    Yes. 100 shares each in Laker Airways and a bottle of Tyne estuary water.

  123. 123
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    I think we all know what is going to happen: the government sells it at a loss to the taxpayer (that’s us, not the Treasury) and their friends (donors to the Tory party) who buy it at a knockdown price then go on to make massive profits.

  124. 124
    The Lobbyist says:

    It was Disraeli, not Twain.

  125. 125
  126. 126
    Colonel Blimp says:

    A good rule is “the first loss is the best loss”.

  127. 127
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    If NR had collapsed wouldn’t they have lost everything? I thought the rule of capitalism was that you risk your own money, not whine for compensation every time it goes wrong.

  128. 128
    Portsmouth Property Developer says:

    Quite right and here in Portsmouth, we launder our drug money directly through property development and mortgage fraud, aided and abetted by those in power, who faciltate us because we are so good to them. We take Asbo evictions from council property into our own properties (suddenly they start behaving themselves), we provide accomodation for ex prisoners, and we donate foreign Villas to the great and the good. easy innit?

  129. 129
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    So would I. Is she under 17?

  130. 130
    Gideon Wallpaper Magnate says:

    The Bank will be bought privately by a prominent businessman for £1bn, who will then turn it around and take the business public for £10bn. We have number of contenders at the moment bidding for the Bank, including Richard Branson. The bids will not be judged on the price for the bank, but by the largest political donation paid into Tory Party coffers through an offshore bank, by the winning bidder. The price for the Bank has already been decided. This will get best value for the taxpyer and help us get re-elected.

  131. 131
    Jimmy says:

    Does anyone here think the taxpayer will get less now then if it had been sold to Branson like Gideon wanted at the time?

    The boy’s a financial genius.

  132. 132
    Anonymous says:

    Errm I think you miss the point.

  133. 133
    Anonymous says:

    See above

  134. 134
    Handycock says:

    Hiya Grant.

  135. 135
    Thicko Watch says:


  136. 136
    Anonymous says:

    I hope all those who constantly bemoan the flogging of the gold at the bottom of the market will also be on Osborne’s case when the value inevitably rises in a few years time.

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