June 13th, 2011

Miliband Defines His View of Government


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Socailist! Just like his daddy!

  2. 2
    David Milliband (note 2 l's) says:

    He needs to spend a few years on an oil rig or deep sea fishing now to get any credibility.

  3. 3
    Mike Litorus says:

    No Shit Sherlock! It’s not a fucking piggy bank for your own home improvement either, but none of you seemed to pick that one up unfortunately.

  4. 4
    Steve Miliband says:

    A blank sheet of paper moment

  5. 5
    AngryEnglishJon says:

    A communist surely

  6. 6
    Gordon Brown says:

    Ed Milliband is a twat and I should know. It takes one to know one.

  7. 7
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    His old man was a Marxist.

  8. 8
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Can someone sit these fuckin politicons down and teach them some history please?

    Every socailist goverment runs out of ther peoples money (Take note Dave), It steals the freedom of the citizens Regulates thier speech and thoughts, Steals their wages and shits on them from thier ivory tower.

    It has also been responsable for over 150 million deaths Yet everytime they come back they say “just give us another chance, This time it will work and we will get it right”.

    Goverment is meant to represent the voters and serve them, Not enslave them.

  9. 9
    Anonymous says:

    Has he only got one tie?

  10. 10
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    Was he talking to the staff at Domino’s?

  11. 11
    Steve Miliband says:

    To the Unions

  12. 12
    retardEd Miliband says:

    Marxthitht, actually.

  13. 13
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    Did he shag the two tarts sitting next to him?

  14. 14
    EdMiliband says:

    I prefer pithath

  15. 15
    Anon says:

    No. As a commercial enterprise, Dominos has to make money. It can’t afford to pay its staff to sit around listening to Adenoid Boy spout complete crap.

  16. 16
    geoff says:

    I feel sorry for Ed really. He was born to be a politician. Sitting at the feet of Tony Benn as the left wing academics discussed how to bring down the country and install their workers paradise. Child abuse in a way and you can see how he turned out. Never done a days work, a strong sense of entitlement, doesn’t mind tax avoidance. A classic millionaire socialist aka Toynbee etc. I sort of wish he’d break his programming and just go off and do something. Run a cafe, be a school teacher. Come back to politics when he’s met someone outside Primrose Hill who isn’t a Marxist.

  17. 17
    Engineer says:

    There’s a story told about David Lloyd George. He was driving through a remote part of the Welsh countryside one day, completely lost. Spying a old man tending a hedge, he stopped, wound down the window and asked, “Where am I?” The old Welshman pondered for a moment before replying, “In a car.”

    Lloyd George was later, on recounting this incident, heard to say, “The perfect politician’s answer. Absolutely accurate, and told you nothing you didn’t already know.”

    That’s RedEd that is. “Government is not like delivering pizza.” Absolutely accurate, and tells us nothing we didn’t already know.

  18. 18
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    I agree with you Gordon, it takes one to know one. How are you?


  19. 19
    the moneyshot says:

    Stuffed crust

    next letter O—fill blanks

  20. 20

    He is the biggest tit.

    Even when placed against these:


  21. 21
    MrAngry61 says:

    I’ve never heard of a pizza delivery business that’s not wedded to the profit motive.

    RedEd appears to think that ‘society’ should operate as a burden on every wealth producing part of the economy.

  22. 22
    John Bellingham says:

    Who can take this juvenile prat seriously?

    He is underqualified to be a stair monitor in a school for Daleks.

  23. 23
    A man who thinks Socialism is a myth, says:

    Why on earth post 25 minutes of this idiot?
    Haven’t we suffered enough?
    The Labour party only exists in the minds of the delusional.

  24. 24
    roygbiv says:

    What a goon. He is Labour’s IDS.

  25. 25
    Steve Miliband says:

    Sell Volvo’s. ” Yes Sir. It’s a very progressive car. Lots of investment gone into this car. You can even get a special finance deal, called PFI whereby we build and own the car and you pay an extortiant monthly fee to use it. After 25 years we still own it.”

  26. 26
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Can we hang under 16s?

  27. 27

    I wouldn’t employ him to deliver pizza. He would spook the customers if he turned up on their doorsteps at night.

  28. 28
    PD77 says:

    Red Ed is definitely the Son of El Gordo, if the Titanic had as many relaunches it would never have sank.

    Red Eds next speech will be something like this:”The fight back for Labour against the Tory led coalition starts now, now, now, now, now and now, now…… (repeat ad infinitum).”

  29. 29
    Smig says:

    It is funny that Ed Balls gives him a spoonful of peanut butter before orating.

  30. 30
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Hain Pantone ref: 104C – tomato and red pepper topping.

  31. 31
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    Engineer, your story is apocryphal. Lloyd George saw a sheep, not an old man, and he got out of the motor and shagged it.

    And the sheep gave birth to Harold Wilson.

  32. 32
    Barry says:

    The rest of the story as told to me in Wales was:
    Lloyd George said, ‘I know that, you are an idiot’
    to which the old man said,
    ‘I may be an idiot, but I know where I am and you do not’.

  33. 33
    PD77 says:

    Don’t get many of them to the 453.60 grammes

  34. 34
    Famines and Firing Squads says:

    When left to run it’s full course it always leads to famine and firing squads.

  35. 35
    Nuff said says:

    I read the Koran every day, says Tony Blair

  36. 36
    Ear Trumpet says:

    Harpo had a better voice.

  37. 37
    Baron Prescott takes the analogy further.... says:

    If Government was like delivering Pizza I would have ate it before it reached the customer and then blamed it on my “illness”.

  38. 38
    Whoever writes your material needs sacking says:

    Not sure about that Titanic analogy, are you saying that it’s sinking was a good thing and that doing something to prevent it sinking is somehow a bad thing ?

  39. 39
    nell says:

    Are you sure that wasn’t kinnochio the sheep gave birth to?

  40. 40
    PD77 says:

    You forgot to add the occasional “Boyo” in there as well plus did Lloyd George ask in English first and get ignored?

  41. 41
    Mike Handycock says:

    Can we bang under 16s?

  42. 42
    Cherie Blair says:

    He enjoys a good laugh.

    Let’s face it, he doesn’t get many with me around.

  43. 43
    AC1 says:

    Hopefully for cheap bog-roll.

  44. 44

    Agree, but marvel at your accuracy. I wonder what the one on the right would say about post neo-endogenous growth theory?

  45. 45
    geoff says:

    You can see that we will look back on the election of Ed as a defining moment when Labour under the power and pay of the unions, retreated into comfort territory, far to the left of Mondeo man or whatever the BBC calls the centrist floating voter these days.

    To be PM you need to take the country with you, not just please your core vote. That’s how the AV vote was lost, Eddie Izzard telling Tony Robinson that AV is a good idea – to applause from the Guardian.

    Question is, will they dump Ed before the election?

  46. 46
    Shylock says:

    I’d like to try

  47. 47
    PD77 says:

    Not that I agree with the way it happened but the sinking of the Titanic did bring passenger safety to the front, but if it had been relaunched as many times as Labour it would have never seen the end of the harbour where it was moored never mind the iceberg.

  48. 48
    Anonymous says:

    Well considering Lloyd George was Welsh…….but you knew that didn’t you ?

  49. 49
    Hugh Janus says:

    …and watch him wave his arms about like a bloody windmill. More coaching I suppose? Won’t make any difference – he’s on borrowed time as it is.

  50. 50
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    There’ll come a time when the English are sick to death of Labour & Tories……

    Red tribe, Blue tribe – same direction same policies.

    Ed or Dave? No difference what so ever to the British electorate:

    * Same big state advocates

    * Same high taxes

    * Same subservience to the undemocratic EU

    * Same immigration policies – though the Tories are now letting in ,ore than Labour

    * Same spend, spend, spend on foreigners whilst our own suffer.

    Do the country & the unborn British taxpayers to come a favour – vote UKIP.

  51. 51
    Dominoes says:

    Looks like a double blank

  52. 52
    PD77 says:

    I certainly did ;), he was played by Anthony Hopkins (who’s also Welsh) in a motion picture chronicling the life of the young Winston Churchill, coincidentally entitled Young Winston, and in that he was given a Welsh accent.

  53. 53
    is it says:

    who is writing this crap?

  54. 54
    Tony says:

    Shut up and get your burkah on

  55. 55
    Anonymous says:

    Error of omission, Guido: he was educated at Oxford and LSE, as well as Harvard..

  56. 56
    the last quango in paris says:

    I’m not a medical person but is he losing the plot ala GB? HIs staring away, gurning and la la land responses about different planets etc?

    I am not a journalist either but I want to know the character of a man who will ask me to vote him as PM – if he finds it so easy to plot against another PM and shaft his brother I think that tells us a great deal.

  57. 57
    David Laws Lib Dem fiddler says:

    This Marxist is finished, we now need to give Mc Clegg a little help to fook off. What does it say about him that he got married to win votes and pretend he is interested in family life. No emotional intelligence, hence no values, no morals no shame. This applies to all those in government and opposition at the moment. Radical change is required.

  58. 58
    Ed Balls says:

    Hee hee hee

  59. 59
    Crikey says:

    Does “social responsibility” involve bankrupting the country and unmandated social engineering?

  60. 60
    The Prince says:

    Guess what he’s been reading

  61. 61
    AnotherAnon. says:

    o’ Mandy.

  62. 62
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Typical politicon.

  63. 63
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Years ago on holiday I had to meet a friend at the bus station in Swansea. I asked a man in his 50s for directions and he responded in Welsh. When I apologised and said I didn’t speak Welsh, he responded in Welsh, again.

    What were the odds on me trying to get directions from the one-and-only Welshman who doesn’t speak English?

  64. 64
    I says:

    Or even delivering pizza

  65. 65
    Engineer says:

    Thanks, Barry. I hadn’t heard that bit before – nice one.

  66. 66
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Whilst this government is a slow-motion car crash, just like the last one, it’s entertaining for us to watch three equally shite parties implode simultaneously.

  67. 67
    Archer Karcher says:

    Didn’t the people behind AV and the luvvie left, all complain in their usual conceited and arrogant way, that AV lost because the British people were too stupid to understand it?

  68. 68
    Tessa Tickles says:

    He does an exceptionally good job of hiding it.

  69. 69
    Engineer says:

    You were pretty unlucky to find anyone in Swansea that could speak Welsh. Most of ‘em can’t in that part of Wales. The Welsh-speaking heartlands are mostly in the North and West.

  70. 70
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    But what will rise from the Ashes?

  71. 71
    I spy says:

    How to Builderaniceberggroup ( German ) .

  72. 72
    pigs in space says:

    If you’ve run out of money and can’t find any policies. Give Stress Relief Red Ed a squeeze. He’s super squishy and squashy, and always returns back to his normal happy self.


  73. 73
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Compare lightwieght Dave and Ed miliband to a real leader!!!!

  74. 74
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Labour the leaning tower of pizza.

  75. 75
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Domino’s Pizza moves from broker hold to sell at once.

    Did anyone ask Red Ed about his business experience, or about his grandpa’s heroic role trying to foist communism on Poland?

  76. 76
    Steve Miliband says:

    Are they related to Chris De Burgh?

  77. 77
    genghiz the kahn says:

    At least he hasn’t done a Ryan and shagged his sister in law…

  78. 78
    I says:

    The Aussies probably

  79. 79

    Dear Santa

    For christmas may i have a time machine , i only need it to go back and transport someone to the future, For if Baroness Thatcher saw what had become of the conservitive party she would weep and say that “socailisim has won”

    Yours Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever !

    Ps I will leave out extra cookies :-)

  80. 80
    I says:

    He may have been there…. but educated there?

  81. 81

    nah , they in choas, Tis as good as the Labour civil war.

  82. 82
    Archer Karcher says:

    Miliband left the British taxpayer with one hell of an expensive Climate Change pizza. It’s virtually inedible and at cost of £720 billion, the worst value for money delivery ever left at our doors.

  83. 83
    I says:

    See next Sunday’s NOTW

  84. 84
    The Cockney Dancer says:

    Oh, my old man’s a Marxist
    He wears a Marxist hat
    He wears cor-blimey trousers
    and he lives in an mansion flat.

    He looks a proper nana
    In his Guardianista sandals,
    He moves our money into trusts
    and calls the bankers vandals.


  85. 85
    I says:

    That tower will still be there when Labour finally topples

  86. 86
    Santa says:

    Tory cookies or socialist cookies?

  87. 87
  88. 88
    D'oh! says:

    This man is clearly a born leader!

  89. 89
    Victor Trumper says:

    Cock sucking BBC wanker


  90. 90
  91. 91
    I says:

    I know but couldn’t resist

  92. 92
    Simon Bunhopton says:

    TWENTY SIX fucking thousand pounds

  93. 93

    Can i just point out that not all cock suckers are lefties or work at the BBC.

  94. 94
  95. 95
    The Cockney Dancer says:

    Don’t knock IDS. While not ideal leader material I find him an intelligent and sincere sort of bloke. Not some palid party aparatchik like Ed.

  96. 96
    Major Eyeswater says:

    I think most in SW1 are underestimating the impact on manufacturing of the looming introduction of a carbon floor price. You have reminded me that the only good thing to be said of this ludicrous act of self-flagellation is that it’s got Limited Ed’s damp and slimy dabs all over it…

  97. 97
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    And it was cold!

  98. 98
    Further version says:

    Oh my old mans a Marxist
    He writes for a lefty rag
    He sends his kids to private school
    Whilst flying the red flag !

  99. 99
    man perch on a barstool says:

    and he wore a marxist hat, he wore cor-blimey trousers and lived in a council flat..

  100. 100
    man perch on a barstool says:

    bugger you beat me to it..

  101. 101
    Santa says:

    For God’s sake Billy. Learn to spell, my gnomes have Googled Speical cookies and cannot find a recipe

  102. 102
    Ed (Bernie Winters) is weird says:

    This man knows his tripe and unions. Talks utter tripe and is propped up by unions. Useless bag o’shite. Is it part of a cunning Blairite plot just to let him speak?

  103. 103
    bergen says:

    Never met a monglot Welsh speaker in Swansea.The way to deal with his sort is then to stand behind him and yell “mind your head”(and watch him duck…)

  104. 104
    Anonymous says:

    What just like the NHS refrorms you mean? I think we all understood those rather too well.

  105. 105
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    How many weeks before Ed tells us “the quiet man is here to stay, and he’s turning up the volume”? Head in hands.

  106. 106
    Fred West. says:

    A person pays the pizza company and expects Delivery of product that satisfies certain criteria. We elect politicians, pay taxes and shouldn’t we expect delivery of what they promised? Governement is exactly like having to deliver pizza. Only Ed hasn’t got the brains to see that principal is the same, he’s confusing it with scale.

  107. 107
    annette curton says:

    A quite disturbing banner in the background I thought, it just says Future for Britain. (fullstop) can I suggest some better sound-bite logo material (thinking out of the box as it were) as:
    1 Is there a future for Britain
    2 Does he know something we don’t (unlikely)
    3 Future for Britain?
    4 The End of the World is Nigh
    5 Make mine a quattro fungi Bro!.
    And finally what job experience has Ed got concerning Pizza Express deliveries?. But good to see we have some serious policy statements coming out at last, extra topping all round.

  108. 108
    Pizzaboy says:

    Look what happens when lefties deliver pizza.

  109. 109
    The Cockney Dancer says:

    Your bill for the use of the Internets Billy.

  110. 110
    Miliballs Bros. Pizza Co. says:


  111. 111
    Mrs B says:

    I blame Sue.

  112. 112
    Ranter says:

    Milliband = Sad useless C*nt

  113. 113
    Beast says:

    Govt IS like delivering pizza
    Against your better judgement you order another one from a different shop, it arrives, tastes just as shite as the last one you had and costs even more
    Different box but same old shite
    Like voting, only tempting when pissed

  114. 114
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    DNA test required. We need to dig up both of them.

  115. 115

    O/T One million workers ‘ready to strike’ Indi

    Will we miss the work of all these outreach and compliance officers? Sack the lot of them now.

  116. 116
    P. Doff says:

    My girlfriend at school in the late ’50s must have been a communist and gone to a lot of meetings. Whenever my hand traveled downwards from her tits she told me it was red flag day and left me to play with myself.

  117. 117
    Are there any real Conservatives left? says:

    This is all well and good but what exactly is Dave’s view of government today?

    It’s certainly different today then what it was a year ago and no doubt will be different each day from now on just to save the Libs!

    There is only one difference now between Brown and Cameron and that is the rate of spending slows down a little. That’s it!

  118. 118
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    You need to use your imagination. You should have told him you were Barry John and suffering from amnesia. Then start humming Sospan Bach.

  119. 119
    Selohesra says:

    I’ve tried to pursuade Mrs S to become one but she says she can’t as she is not a lefty and does not work for the BBC. I shall quote Mr Bowden when I get get home tonight – wish me luck

  120. 120
    Anonymous says:

    I agree I work for Ghenghis Khan

  121. 121

    So fucking David NO BALLS Cameron will make the max dole limit you can claim a year 26,000 but has billions to throw out like confetti at a wedding to India, P*kiland and any other tom, chan and adbul who has a begging bowl pointed in our direction.


  122. 122
    not a machine says:

    Spot on Guido background made me laugh :) focus group patch , mmm benefit cheats and banker scoundrels , so said the pre amble and yet how many bankers were spads? in 2 yrs time we will be better positioned for policies to help britain was one line this morning . I would think that in 2 yrs time we will be so peaed off with paying for labours debt (again no admission of fraud with publics money and spinning of untruths) applause for such speaches will be a dubbed on sound.

    Big push on Blair mk2 going on , all overseen by machines of loving grace.

  123. 123
    Archer Karcher says:

    How many working people take home after tax, anything like that amount? Seriously, the coalition are fucking useless wets and they wonder why people cross the world to get to UK benefitland or can’t be bothered to get out of bed, hopeless.

  124. 124
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    Is that the same as looking at toilet paper after wiping your arse?

  125. 125
    not a machine says:

    apart from everyones life being made miserbable when either party would be making you pay the debt , come to think of it I never knew what the libdems debt reduction scheme was .

    What do you think now of the No to AV ? was it just a doggie treat

  126. 126



  127. 127
    Archer Karcher says:

    Er, I hate to break this to you, but spending is still rising and is set to rise, in real terms, every year to 2015.
    Yes they are spending more than the Scottish lunatic, though you would never guess it from the way the MSM and BBC are reporting it.

  128. 128
    Wear the Fox Hat says:

    What is this an IQ test? Most people on this bog write horizontally.

  129. 129
    Anonymous says:

    He is obviously deluded enough to think that if it worked for Brown, it can work for him.

  130. 130
    annette curton says:

    Billy must have at least 10,000 cookies clogging up his hard drive, If you pardon the expression.

  131. 131
    Who, me? says:

    Well, at least this shows that little Millipanda thoroughly understood year one of his PPE course. And, come to think of it, year two which taught how to patronise the electorate (a particular favourite of the many BBC alumni). Money well spent, say I.

  132. 132
    Hang The Bastards says:

    What does this arsehole know about what goes on in a boardroom ?

    He has never had a proper job, let alone have any idea how the private sector works.

    He is, pardon my french, a clueless-fucking-lightweight !

  133. 133
    Spank Sinatra says:

    That fuckwit couldn’t work out how many different cheeses to put on a ‘four cheese / quattro stagione’ let alone make his way to the correct address with the correct pizza, ask for the correct amount and give the correct change (if required). Long may he continue in his current position.

  134. 134
    Jabba the Cat says:

    Lol…perfect summary…

  135. 135
    Spank Sinatra says:

    Oh cock – meant quattro formaggio but you get my drift. Time to pull a cork methinks……

  136. 136
    Jabba the Cat says:

    Unfortunately, Farage and the kippered pygmies are parked in the spot for a real opposition party that does not have its grubby fingers in the EUSSR petty cash tin box.

  137. 137
    Mike Hunt says:

    Welshman who doesn’t speak English?

    I think you mean wouldn’t speak English.

  138. 138
    Airey Belvoir says:

    In fact Lloyd George saw a man in a field hanging out of the back of a sheep and, not quite believing his eyes asked “Are you shearing that sheep?” Back came the
    indignant reply; “No I’m not boy, find your bloody own.”

  139. 139
    Down With Brown! says:

    Pizza makes a change from bananas

  140. 140
    Ivan Agenda says:

    Right on

  141. 141
    Ivan Agenda says:

    Brilliant – shades of Big Brother here we come

  142. 142
    pigs in space says:

    Could Ed do the job? Sounds a bit above his level of incompetence, so might qualify under the Peter Principle.


    As one of our delivery drivers you have an important responsibility; to ensure our pizzas arrive promptly to our customers. This needs to be done in a safe and efficient manner.

    Drive safely and promptly to customers homes
    Be polite, courteous and look presentable, wearing full uniform at all times
    Have a strong knowledge of the local area
    Maintain vehicles in a clean and safe condition
    To deal first hand with any customer issues in a polite and courteous manner
    To assist in other areas of the business where required

    Required Experience
    No experience necessary, full training will be provided.

  143. 143
    Sir Everard Digby says:

    THat’s fine.will our MPs be reducing their salaries to the same level? I thought not.

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