June 10th, 2011

Balls Throws Up Smokescreen

At the urging of Ed Balls, David Bell, the Permanent Secretary in the Department for Education has ordered a leak inquiry which has sent his department into semi-paralysis. First thing to realise is that the desks and personal effects of ministers are cleared before a new administration comes in. So the source can not be political if we accept at face value Balls is telling the truth that the last he saw of the documents was in his old office. We know better than to accept anything Balls says at face value.

Could it be a civil servant? Why would Ed Balls, a secretive plotter by nature, leave such incendiary evidence lying around for civil servants to pinch. It shows that a PM had plotted against the former PM. Guido’s instinct is that this comes from within the Labour Party…

UPDATE: A source close to Gove tells Guido: “Like with Sharon Shoesmith, Ed Balls is pathetically trying to blame officials. He should ask his best friend Damian McBride how these things get leaked.” Ouch…


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Balls needs a lampost prepared, I am on it.

    • 3
      Jockey de Sausage says:

      ii) Polishing Brown. – You can’t polish a turd

      • 55
        Super Zuffle says:

        No……but you can roll it in glitter

        • 77
          Gary says:

          I don’t want to be in your gang.

          • David Laws Lib Dem fiddler says:

            Who cares how it came into the hands of the DT. It shows ALL politicians can not be trusted. They were more interested in themselves than the financial crisis that we are now paying for and the 7/7 bombings happening.

            No clean up to date of Parliament or Lords. This spans all parties and it is incumbent on Caeron, McClegg and Milliband to have a root and branch change. The public needs the right to recall and referendums on key issues. Politicians can not be trusted. They lack emotional intelligence to make good decisions, set values or standards for the rest of us.

            They use their intelligence for school boy debates, throwing money away and self serving interest. Time for a radical change.

          • Dave Cameron, privileged moron says:

            Tough on god, tough on the causes of god.

            I’m building a Conservative democracy that’ll last for a thousand years.

            No one can stop me now!

        • 151
      • 81
        Backbencher says:

        J’accuse, Alan Bennett plagiariser.

        Seriously though, who gives a shit. A politician doing what politicians do as naturally as the rest of us piss or shit.

      • 83
        Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

        Actually I was watching Mythbusters the other night and they proved you can polish a turd (lion dung I think it was) but it took a long time, achieved nothing and the turd still smelt bad.

        • 121
          Cameron, like Bliar, is a Cunt says:

          I was watching ‘Total Wipeout’ but it won’t make any difference

      • 92
        Bill d'Sarse says:

        You can – it was on Mythbusters, but it does take a special kind of turd.

      • 147
        nohandsclapping says:

        Wrong, Mythbusters on the Discovery Channel proved you can polish a turd, they made one so shiny it looked like a Pickles sized M&M…

      • 170
        Polished Brown says:

        I just wanted to mention the popular culture show, Mythbusters, at this point…

    • 5
      Peter Grimes says:

      Remember to put the rope around Bollox’ neck not your own before you jump off the lampost, Billy!

    • 8
      Ballsgate says:

      I think I have solved the gyrating pig doodle.

      It is Mrs Yvette Balls


    • 14
      Anonymous says:

      Could have been leaked after Dave spoke to Clegg. On Freeschools, only 8 are opening, some are private schools getting government cash to become free others are muslim schools, which will be free to teach what it wants.

    • 19
      AC1 says:
      • 24
        Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

        only BeeBoid i have any respect for.

        • 37
          Anonymous says:

          Wait for Osborne fucking Cameron to come up; all this weeks messes were encouraged and started by Osborne (using cuts), Cameron gets the blame.

          • Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

            What cuts?

          • Ed Balls says:

            So what?

          • David, smell my glove, Laws says:

            Cameron rightly gets the blame. The buck stops at the top (wo)man.

            This frank talk won’t jeapordise my chances, will it Dave?

          • Old dog no tricks says:

            Now where have we seen this situation before – the Leader taking all the flack and the Chancellor being bigged up as doing a grand job (whilst doing an awful one by spending all our money and borrowing big time (- this time on useless Euro zone bailouts))

            Oh welcome to the New Blue replacing the New Red !

            Any reports that Osbourne wants to be leader of the Leftervative party appearing yet ? No – Give it a year or two whilst Geogie boy gets his reputation grown a bit ! What is the phrase going to be ? ‘Prudence’, ‘getting on with the job ‘or maybe ‘doing the right thing’ ?

        • 118
          labourunionsbbc we are one says:

          Me three, omly I do like Aggers, CMJ and Blowers too.

        • 129
          Infuriated of West Mids says:


      • 25
        Tory says:

        Good for you.

        Bet Balls won’t come on your show for a while now.

      • 27
        Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

        Or in some cases covered it up.

      • 32
        Liar Liar Pants on fire. says:

        Bollock Ed has just given an interview saying there was no plot to replace Blair with Brown.

        Outright lying when everyone knows they are lying is the number one Labour defence. And oddly it seems to work.

        • 49
          Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

          IT does work with the BBC, just like Toenails Robinson attacked the woman who accused McMong of being a bully, then when it finally came out Brown was a bully, Robinson admitted live on air he know about it.

          The BBC=Scum

        • 65
          I Remember You Hoo says:

          ‘If you repeat a lie often enough, it becomes the truth’ Joseph Goebbels.

        • 215
          Ed But Look Balls says:

          Bollox actually said that Bliar was involved in the meetings, haven’t looked at the docs to check if Bliar is really but there are some more to publish; sure way to find out is to ask Bliar but is he keeping his powder dry!?

      • 94
        jaykay says:

        Toenails now coming out with the exact same line. Disappointing that Andrew Neil looks to be part of the BBC cover up:


      • 114
        Mike Hunt says:

        Brillo spot on, as almost always.

        • 242
          Wolverhampton Ring Road says:

          I knew somebody actually called Mike Hunt. He reported to a woman. We were all desperate to hear her in meetings saying things like
          ” Mike Hunt’s on holiday this week”.
          ” I’ll ask Mike Hunt after the meeting”
          ” I’m not sure, Mike Hunt prepared this programme”
          ” I’l get Mike Hunt on it straight away”
          ” Mike Hunt’s the expert on this”

          Sadly, she never did.
          What a missed opportunity. But it was worth going to the meetings…just in case.

    • 76
      AC1 says:

      Happy Birthday Emily!

      • 93
        Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

        Miss Emily On Guy news was so much better then…..

      • 104
        Backwoodsman says:

        Fawkes, from the Specie, good to see our old friend debs ‘ give me a big public contract’ mattinson was part of the balls up.
        ” Deborah Mattinson’s “Project Volvo” report, which contrasts her boss’s — ahem — “integrity” and “steadfastness” with David Cameron’s verve and youthful energy. Brown “needs more likeablity,” it suggests”

      • 122

        Another Gemini. Mmmm. Licks lips in a superpositionly, catish sort of way.

      • 212
        Jabba the Cat says:

        The whole ZaNuLab backstabbing business has made me feel good.

    • 143
      Anonymous says:

      Whatever happened they ultimately did the country a favour by getting Mc Ruin into No 10. Hopefully nothing of the kind will happen again.

    • 158
      AC1 says:

      Thanks Brown!

    • 193
      Vic Sinhaler says:

      Whether, when they reflect on the court of appeal’s unanimous judgment, that is a worthwhile use of scarce public money is another matter.

      Scarce public money? The Guardian? Aren’t they the guys and gals who think that there is an endless supply of it because they never paid attention in school?

      Ms Shoesmith was entitled to be treated in a procedurally proper way.

      Baby P dies because procedures were not followed properly yet reviews found the paperwork not and tidy so she got glowing reviews.

      Come on Shoesmith. Take down Balls. And Balls get rid of this useless jobsworth.

    • 238
      the flying scrotum says:

      Between them they have done more smears than a fanny clinic

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Personal and political communications are not the responsibility of the civil service.

    If Balls can’t look after his own stuff, then tough.

    • 50
      Bled White Taxpayer says:

      Either a disgruntled civil servant pinched the papers before the SpAD got around to collecting them (unprofessional and unlikely in my view), the SpAD (Francine Bates and Alex Belardinelli) had an agenda, or the SpAD overlooked the box of papers and a cleaner got them (also unlikely).

      • 80
        Anonymous says:

        They’ve come from somewhere?

        I don’t think it’s the Labour party. I still favour the office.

        • 98
          Backbencher says:

          Again, standard political shenanigans.

          My guess is a Tory leaning civil servant, but as this happens all the time I find it hard to be exercised by the details.

          They’re all at this sort of thing regardless of party, i.e. calculated leak, innocent denials, faux outrage.


          • Alexsandr says:

            probably left on a photocopier or printer, or the word processing file left on some server somewhere.

          • Anonymous says:

            The ship of state is the only ship that leaks from the top. I suspect it was a certain David Bell, probably with the nudge-nudge-wink-wink blessing of his minister. But we’ll never know: leak inquiries virtually never report.

    • 101
      Windsor Tripehound says:

      As my old mum used to say, “liars need good memories”.

      Looks like Balls has a bit of a memory problem. Early onset of Alzheimer’s perhaps?

      • 108
        Backbencher says:

        Isn’t the standard get out of jail free card ‘I can’t remnember’?

      • 218
        Ed But Look Balls says:

        Bollox mentioned on WatO that he hasn’t written his memoirs yet, well that’s a chunk of papers that he can use now they have been found!

  3. 4
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Guido’s instinct is that this comes from within the Labour Party…”

    The blairites strike back!, D Miliband was in the house other day, Blair in papers saying EU needs another president….

    O/T Hope you enjoyed ya play last night Guido, am looking forward to reading the review :-)

    • 44
      Steve Miliband says:

      Blair Leak project

      • 144
        Mike Hunt says:

        Alter all, the millionaire war criminal has been all over telly like a rash plugging his book (has this man no shame) so some stories showing how he was forced out are no surprise.

        The surprise is that e.bollox STILL denies it.

        PMQs next week should be fun.

      • 202
        ssdb says:

        They could name the hunt for the mole “the Which Blairite Project?”

        • 244
          Peter Grimes says:

          Whereas SlotGob Blair could audition for The Blair Witch Project and would walk it.

    • 127
      labourunionsbbc we are one says:

      Does paint him as innocent victim, Hmmmm.

    • 223
      A Bearded Wassock in a Cassock says:

      Wasn’t there gossip circulating a few months back that a Telegraph journalist was ‘over-friendly’ with Mrs. Balls?

  4. 6
    bs says:

    I share Guido’s instinct with one gloss – it might have involved a disaffected Civil Servant or Special Adviser or some such staffer – because ultimately it is members of the Labour Party who are most interested in this. I know it confirms what we always believed about the awful Balls, but itis Labourites who smart more from his antics than anyone else.

    Of course, it’s only an instinct at this stage. If you were an incoming Tory and you found that stuff on your desk what would you do…?

    • 13
      Tory says:

      I wouldn’t wait a year to release it. So it’s not me.

      • 22
        Dick the Prick says:

        I’d sell it and would be asking for at least £20k

      • 116
        Backbencher says:

        I’m not so sure I wouldn’t wait before releasing it.

        It’s been a bad week for Dave and then on top of everything else god intervenes.

        Seems like ideal timing to me.

    • 18
      Dick the Prick says:

      I don’t think you’d let staff anywhere near it. If it is staff, it’s fucking senior staff. Balls knows who’s released it – ha fucking ha.

    • 28
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      Yes this definitely smells of an internal Labour Party thing or possibly someone Balls had exerted his “personal charm” on whilst in office.

  5. 7
    Anonymous says:

    Perfect, I was looking for similar information. I have bookmarked your blog. Please post more about.



  6. 9
    Anonymous says:

    But surely the only people in the Labour party who saw these memos were the people involved? Balls would never copy to people he didn’t trust. So why would they leak, and now? Particularly as the Huhne saga is nearing its’ end.

  7. 10
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:


  8. 11
    Speedster says:

    Watching blinkey on the beeb 24 news, hilarious!
    Getting nachos and dips in to watch this stuff all day – fab start to my weekend!

  9. 12
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Balls is squirming on BBC News 24 at this very moment. Unusual for the BBC to run an anti labour story.
    Balls does not know when he is lying, which should be easy as it’s all the time.
    Balls is bile.

    • 132
      labourunionsbbc we are one says:

      I would guess that it’s more damage limitation than anti liebore.

  10. 16
    YokshireLad says:

    Why the f**k should there be an enquiry?
    It was work for the Party, NOT the Government.
    If anything Bollock Brain should be hauled up to account for his use of public money for Party Political purposes.

    • 99
      I Remember You Hoo says:

      Personal political purposes.

    • 102
      bergen says:

      Quite right.These are internal Labour party affairs and should not have involved the Civil Service in general or his Department in particular at all.

      If he was f***witted enough to leave the papers in his Department files,he’s got no-one to blame but himself.

      Why is there a leak enquiry about non-governmental papers?Why should the taxpayer fund it?Will Balls refund the taxpayer if the leak came from within the Party?

    • 191
      Aesop o'Sardis says:

      Perhaps because the Labour party deliberately conspired to replace an evil warmonger with a deranged misanthrope purely to further their own insane ambitions. The country and the British people have suffered great damage at the hands of these Labour party gangsters. We need to understand the full depth of their depravity so that we never make the mistake of believing, again, that any politician has any motivation other than to grab power and cash for themselves.

      • 194
        Aesop o'Sardis says:

        Strong message follows when I get back from visiting Stella at the Saracen’s Head.

  11. 17
    Lie Balls says:

    Bollocks was just on the Telly saying that he did not regard the papers as important.

    So he is still lying through his teeth.

    He also sounded as if he were the Labour leader, pulling the party together and all that stuff.

    I would not be surprised if Balls himself was the leaker. He loves being in the spotlight.

  12. 20
    Moley says:

    In the best traditions of Labour Loyalty, the leak probably came from Yvette Cooper in order to further her leadership bid.

    • 195
      Aesop o'Sardis says:

      I feel an overwhelming urge to vomit at the thought of Yshaped Balls – and particularly of her leaks!

  13. 20

    As someone pointed out this morning the leak is most likely to be from the desk Ed Miliband, in an attempt to shore up his increasingly fragile position.

  14. 23
    I don't need no doctor says:

    You can still hear lies through a smokescreen.

  15. 26
    Blinky is an evil sack of shit says:

    Just saw Balls on Sky denying there was a plot. This c unt has some real chutzpah. The documents lay bare a vicious plot and he has the audacity to come on TV and deny what everyone can see. A lying c unt to his very core.

  16. 30
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    This is Darlings revenge!

  17. 34
    E. Diddit says:

    I’d look no further than wee Dougie for the source. This wee Scottie has ambitions ye ken!

  18. 35
    Jess The Dog says:

    It’s political party material, within the domain of special advisers and spin doctors. They would have been stood down and made to clear the desks as soon as the election was called. It’s nothing to do with the Civil Service. Any inquiry will reach this conclusion very quickly. Not a smokescreen, more like arse-covering.

  19. 37
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m a Porsche. Or a Ferrari.

  20. 39
    Gonk says:

    ‘ Did you leak them ?’
    ‘No. did you ?’
    ‘No I bloody well didn’t’
    ‘Where’s Gordon. I haven’t seen him
    for ages ‘
    ‘ Who’s Gordon’.
    ‘Right, call Simon Templar immediately’

  21. 41
    Moley says:

    Reposted from a previous thread.

    From the Telegraph Documents.

    Memo written by Balls 19 July 2005.

    “Ed M” and “Damian” (among others) nominated to cover Tory issues.”

    Ed Miliband, Damian Mc Bride and Balls all linked together to smear the Tories.

    There is going to be a lot exposed about Ball’s denials of any links with Mc Bride, but I didn’t realise that Ed Miliband was in there with Mc Bride and Balls on the smear operation.

  22. 42
    Wed Red Ed says:
    • 48
      Shitty Ed says:

      So this is the man who not only plotted against Tony Blair but shafted his own brother.

      I had thought that he was just an out of touch elite geek but it is now becoming obvious that he is a nasty shit to boot.

    • 51
      Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

      Tut Tut, Who were Browns right hand men?

    • 84
      Anonymous says:

      Yet the Thatcher era was over 20 years ago, but that doesn’t seem to stop Labour harping back to that time when it suits them.

      A party which is supposed to be looking to the future? Don’t make me laugh.

      • 138
        AC1 says:

        Berlin wall fell, Marxism doesn’t work. Time for Labour to go the same way as the wall.

      • 141
        labourunionsbbc we are one says:

        Here’s a laff from a late great comic: “A future fair for all”.

    • 186
      Phantom says:

      Well we know this t*at has form.

      First, he helps shaft Blair…

      Must have been good practice/got a taste for it…

      Then, he shafts his brother….

  23. 43
    Jess The Dog says:

    If the Civil Service had this material back in 2010, it would have been (rightly) leaked long ago! This is not protectively-marked official information, and there is a public interest in making it public. I don’t suppose this was subject to an injunction attempt by any chance…..

  24. 45
    Greychatter says:

    Let’s hope this had made a “Balls” of Ed’s political career, or is it that He considers any publicity Good publicity.

    The sooner we see the back of this devious politician the better British politics will be, but it only the voters in his constituency that can make the decision to get shut.

    • 53
      Perfumed Balls says:

      Any publicity is good publicity as far as Balls is concerned. He’ll come up smelling of roses.

    • 54
      Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

      I agree about voters, Was watching some bit on Fox News about Wiener and how the house might kick him out, surley as his hasnt broken the law it is down to his voters to make the desicon not other politicons?

  25. 47
    Selohesra says:

    I suspect that Ed Balls is probably not a very nice person.

  26. 52
    Ed Balls says:

    And while were at it:
    The IMF are wrong
    There is no deficit
    I am really charming

  27. 56
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am a Ssangyong Rectum

  28. 57
    Moley says:

    Stop Press.

    “Ed Balls resigns “to save the Labour Party he loves”.

    It defines Ball’s character that there can be no one alive who would find that story truthful.

  29. 58
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Well this is the Labourlist view


    Mark Ferguson you are a utter fuckhead and total scum, you defend this behaviour while people were dying, Police/fire crews/ambulances were risking thier lives (Union workers), You are a sick C-unt and as twisted as Derek Draper and Damain Mcbride.

  30. 60
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Coffee House reporting that another Balls related story about to break – hopefully it has something to do with rotting syphilis

  31. 62
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    The BBC will kill this story, unlike say Andy Coulson where the BBC and the Guardian never let up.

    The BBC never allow negative stories about Liebore (Brown and Balls in particular) to get traction in the media.

    Except the BBC to start to spin some anti Tory story big time as the weekend approaches. Don’t expect Marr to mention it on Sunday even if it’s on the front pages of most of the right wing press.

  32. 63
    Breton says:

    Very unlikely to be a civil servant. Even in Private Office they wouldn’t still have access to private documents unless saved on a shared drive or document management system. Balls would never leave them there unless an even bigger idiot than he seems. Also why would a senior civil servant risk all now to leak?

    • 109
      Anonymous says:

      These are hard copies. Could have been left and picked up from anywhere.

      • 152
        South of the M4 says:

        Obtained many months ago and put in someone’s bottom drawer for later use is my guess. Someone who has a lot to lose by Ball’s ascendancy. Was Ball’s planning a coup around conference season time?

    • 222
      Anonymous says:

      Breton @ 63 “Balls~~~~~unless an even bigger idiot than he seems”
      He joins all those others that were idiotic enough to leave their default pin no’s unchanged & left themselves wide open to hackers.
      He not only “seems”,he is a dangerous idiot.

  33. 64
    Lablobby says:

    Toenails has just opined.

    • 107
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      The greasy little spiv is taking the line that all those who claimed the Blair – Brown war was a journalistic fantasy should apologise.

      More to the point political journalist including his good self should apologise for downplaying this to the general public and allowing odious little shits like Militwit, Balls McBride, Draper and Watson to continue with their nauseating behaviour.

  34. 67
    Jockey de Sausage says:

    Millband + Ryan Giggs

    • 113
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      Ryan Giggs is the first Welshman in living memory to be the subject of a sexual scandal that doesn’t involve sheep (or badgers!!)

  35. 72
    Sophie says:

    What utter scum the Labour Party is infested with.

    Feral evil careerists who would sell their own kind out to get power.

    SIckening that those smug evil bastards are still sucking up taxpayers cash instead of serving long prison sentences for the ruination they have bought upon this country, & upon British taxpayers who are yet born.

    Labour are scum – & the only people who vote for them are tribal scum who are no better than they are.

  36. 73
    Gonk says:

    The devil will find work for idle hands to do
    I stole and I lied, and why ?
    Because you asked me to !
    But now you make me feel so ashamed
    Because I’ve only got two hands
    Well, I’m still fond of you, oh-ho-oh

  37. 75
    Gordon Brown says:

    You’re all wrong. I wasn’t plotting. I was plopping. It’s my favourite hobby.

  38. 78
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Happy Birthday Emily Nomates x

    Miss ya on Guy News.

  39. 79
    Moley says:

    According to LabourList(ing heavily);

    “Except the split in New Labour wasn’t classified at the time. It wasn’t even a secret.”

    So there won’t be any need of a leak enquiry, will there?

  40. 85
    Eamonn U Ensis says:

    Words fail me that a Minister of the Crown would leave “confidential papers” on his desk(if Balls is to be believed) whether they be “Labour Party Documents” or “Government Papers”…as has been pointed out..Do you honestly think that someone would leave such incriminating stuff in a folder on his desk when he’s vacating the office for someone to pick up,copy or read.It defies belief but if it’s true then it is equally damning proof that Balls was/is unfit to have sight of any documentation or occupy any Ministerial post in the future if he just leaves paperwork lying around in such a cavalier attitude.

    All I would ask is who has the most to gain by dis-crediting Balls…a nameless civil servant or someone within Labour ? I know which I would choose.

    • 89
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      Actually the answer is probably the UK population in general.

  41. 87
    Ed Balls, Shallow Chancer says:

    First the smokescreen, then a barrage of bvllshit then finally denial from all of the Liebour spinners…………..http://bit.ly/ly80um

    • 159
      Moley says:

      That is a really good picture;

      a thoroughly convincing impersonation of Ad*lph. H., even to the hair and the shadow under the nose.

  42. 91
    Penfold says:

    Nice to see that those that live by the stab in the back, are stabbed in the back.

    Balls is an odious little tosspot, who has finally got his comeuppance. As for trying to blame civil servants we should attach little credence to that particular line, the exposure of these documents is in the national interest. Interest, as it lays to ground the lies regarding the fractious relationship between Gordo and B-Liar and the eventual coup d’etat, and clearly sets out what an awful and scheming little shit Gordo was and all those involved.

    The PS, David Bell should not waste time energy effort and money in pursuing Balls’s cover up. It’s his job, i.e. Balls, to keep his private papers safe, they are after all not government papers, unless internal plotting and coups are managed on public payroll.

    • 100
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      This is correct – Labour Party internal memoranda are not the responsibility of the Civil Service. Bell should tell Balls to fuck off and learn how to look after his personal papers.

  43. 95
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Hang on, If they were left on his desk at Education, Makes ya think why he wasnt doing the job he was supposed to? No wonder he hung shoesmith out to dry, Had his eye of the Ball.

  44. 96
    J.L.Lewis says:

    Goodness gracious, great Balls of Liar !!!

  45. 97
    John Rees says:

    Time for a spot of phone-hacking to clarify the situation

  46. 105
    Moley says:

    Prior to 2005 Ed Balls was a Treasury adviser to Gordon Brown.

    Labour and the other parties need to consider how it was that such a loathsome creature was parachuted into a safe seat, (presumably by Brown himself), to immediately become a powerful political figure.

    It shouldn’t have been allowed to happen then, and Parliament needs to make sure that it does not happen in the future.

    It isn’t democracy is it, Mr Cameron?

  47. 106
    Crime Watch says:

    I trust the RSPCA will investigate this crime caught on Camera. Larry should press charges.


    • 124
      annette curton says:

      Basic instinct kicks in yet again when an officer of the Met meets an innocent bystander.

    • 137

      Here we have a clear chance of a wave function collapsing.

    • 145
      Nodrog Nworb says:

      Trying to use the foot scraper to clean the mess off of his shoes. Nothing to see here, stop trying to change the subject away from the Liebour Lies…… Oooops forgot my loyalty.
      Fizzy drink time.

    • 165
      sockpuppet #4 says:

      Quite a normal technique. Cats fart about on doorsteps all the time. Either its indecision, or some sort of powerplay-mindgame. Only looks like a gentle shove.

      • 177
        Eamonn U Ensis says:

        Booting the “Official Downing Street Mouser” up the arse in front of the watching media isn’t advisable though…………

    • 172
      Gonk says:

      Loitering with intent. Cat burglar.
      Arrest with a bit more vigour next time

      • 235
        the next Mr Katona says:

        used to do that all the time to my old cat. If I didn’t, she would sit there fannying around on the doorstep letting all the heat out of the front door.

  48. 112
    annette curton says:

    How did Balls get elected in Morley and Outwood?, by less than a thousand votes and that after 3000 from postman Pat.

  49. 123
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Increase in Crime in Parliament

    Volvo top of daily politics.

  50. 128
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Playing same clip fromyear ago Guido.

    Liam “Theres no money left” byrne on politics

  51. 130
    Carlos The Jackal Ver 2.0 says:

    I will kidknap and tie this motherfuckering beetch down and stick an hot iron up his arse for 30,000 of your pounds.

  52. 133
    Liar Byrne, aka Baldemort says:

    I’m on Daily Politics doing a great job defending my Liebour chums.

    P.S. There’s no money left.

    • 150
      I don't need no doctor says:

      I am on the DP Show being the biggest wanker labour could find at that particular moment.

    • 245
      Peter Grimes says:

      And Baldemort’s blink count nearly matched that of the serial liar Bollox.

  53. 134
    Albino Luciani says:

    Assuming that the leak hunt by Permanent Secretary David Bell goes nowhere (like these things always do), can we please have the following headline:

    Balls Leak Reaches Bell End

  54. 136
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Ask about 7/7 Jo!!!!!

    • 157
      Jo Job says:

      Bloody shame Brillo doesn’t work Fridays. Jo is no match for the top Labour MPs and Lefty Journalists

      • 229
        Boudicca says:

        I thought she did a good job against Byrne. She prevented him from evading the questions and ignored him when he predictably tried to turn his appearance into a party political broadcast.

  55. 146
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    HAHAHAHAHA !! All the Liebour shills having insuperable difficulty defending Brown/Balls’ despicable characters.

  56. 148
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Liam Byrne is on the Daily Politics show. He has taken being a complete shit to an all new level. What is he?

  57. 153
    simon r says:

    So, according to the documents they saw Brown as a Volvo that needed re-branding.

    What does that make Ed Miliband ?

    A tandem bike with Balls in the back seat and two flat tyres.

  58. 154
    Engineer says:

    OK – so we now have a slightly chaotic Coalition government and a fractured and bickering opposition. Meanwhile, the deficit is barely reducing, consequently debt is still increasing, the NHS won’t accept the need to do better, the Libyan situation looks like a stalemate and the world economic situation looks somewhat perilous.

    Will nobody think of the taxpayer?

  59. 160
  60. 162
    Ed Balls says:

    I keeel all my enemies! Oops, looks like I’ve spent too long watching videos of my idol Col Gaddafi.

  61. 165
    I don't need no doctor says:

    I wonder if an Ed Balls document exists that tells the truth?

  62. 169

    A cat can be an observer as well. Why not?

  63. 175
    Gordon Brown says:

    I like to plop and I like to plot. But mainly I like to plop. And sometimes I like plotting a plop. But usually I just plop.

  64. 178
    Steve Miliband says:

    Balls is like a Land Rover Defender of the Indefensible

  65. 179
    Anonymous says:

    Perhaps these papers went adrift when he cleared his office in a Ministry he had no interest in at all with great haste in order to move into No.11.

    Only to have to move back in again when Darling told Brown to FO&D rather than see a toad like Balls run the economy into the ground just to win a few more votes in an election they could never win.

  66. 181
    Gordon Brown is a monster says:

    I hate Blair but I do love the irony of Brown calling HIM muddled! :-D :-D :-D

  67. 182
    The BBC says:

    We will be giving Mr Balls lots of airtime to defend himself against these baseless allegations cooked up by the right wing press. Where is their evidence?

  68. 187
    Gordon is a Volvo says:

    Have a look at “Volvo Boy” Gordon AFTER his makeover –


  69. 188
    Anonymous says:

    Has there ever been such a pile of slimey shit in public life.What a scumbag !!.
    How can any decent individual ever vote for him for any position in any organisation ever again.

  70. 197

    From BBC

    “Mr Balls has vehemently denied that he was involved in any plot against Tony Blair”

    Its on the lunchtime news bulletin. If you listen carefully you can actually hear Eddie’s boxers burst into flames.

    • 205
      Socialists = Sociopaths says:

      How the fuck can he deny it ?? There’s documentary evidence !!!

      Mind you, there’s documented evidence that he and Brown completely fucked the UK economy but they both deny that as well.

      Hypocrisy and Mendacity – it’s in Liebour’s D-N-A.

  71. 199
    Thats News says:

    Inside the mind of Ed

  72. 200
    Ren says:

    Loving the squirming on R4. Haha

  73. 203
    John Bull says:

    Where will this all end ?

    Will part of the House of Commons be rented out ?

    Communities secretary Eric Pickles is assessing plans to rent out the foyer of Eland House to a supermarket, according to press reports.

    Eland House, home of Mr Pickles’ department Communities and Local Government, occuplies a prime retail space in Cardinal Place, Victoria.

    According to reports in the Evening Standard, Mr Pickles has asked officals to assess prospects for a private tenant to get value for money for the taxpayer.

    It’s understood that Pickles aims to raise up to £1 million pounds a year by letting chains such as Waitrose or Tesco set up shop on the bottom floor.

    A Whitehall source told the paper: “It’s a serious proposal to get value for the taxpayer from a building that is smack in the middle of a prime retail location.”

  74. 203
    Son of Volvo says:

    You leave Brown’s right hand and my Balls out of this.

  75. 211
    Simontm says:

    Well, he was “negotiating”. What a load of balls

    Also, how can he justify the blatant lying in the Marr interview?

    Meanwhile, I think Nick Clegg looks a bit sad

  76. 213
    Stan Butler says:

    I’ve just listened to the slimy Stephen Pound on the Labour supporting BBC 5 Live. What an odious fool he is. He tried every feeble trick that MP’s do when faced with trying to deny the truth and in the end and when he had lost, tried weekly to just rubbish the story as old news. What a cock.

    • 220
      Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

      Pound is always the bottom for the barrel for liebore, he’ll be on Sky News night as well.

      Rent a shit by name, rent a shit by nature.

      Expect Ed Balls to be given a totally free pass on Newsnight.

    • 241
      John says:

      Steven Pound is scientific evidence of Darwin’s theory of evolution. It is possible to prove genetically that Steven Pound resides somewhere underneath Ed Balls’ arsehole, although it took a while to discover him because you can only see the soles of his feet.

  77. 226
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Ed Miliband (Ed the Ostrich) says people aren’t interested in the past.
    OH YES WE ARE, keep it coming!

  78. 228
    50 Calibre says:

    Balls lies like stinking fish. It’s what he does…

  79. 231
    Tony Bliar middle east peace envoy says:

    I will give Balls credit, if it wasnt for his lips moving and his excesive blinking I would say he is telling the truth……….

  80. 232
    loungelizard says:

    People like Balls can’t get through their day without smearing shit over everything they come into contact with.

  81. 233
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    It wasn’t me. I am in my Villa in Spain, carrying out important political research for the NSPCC, which I am a member of. Boaz.

    • 243
      Yvette Cooper says:

      Sorry to drop you in it Handy. It was actually me. Am I too old for you?

  82. 236
    the next Mr Katona says:

    It just goes to show what a wise decision it was when I stopped voting for these fucking lying Labour arseholes.

    Party of the working man my fat hairy arse.

  83. 237
    Bird wsb says:

    Just supposing Ed had taken the papers home and Yvette passed them to her journalist friend. No, surely not…?

  84. 240
    John says:

    The only surprise is that this is unsurprising. He is a tosser of the first order, a pathological liar, a schemer, an egotist who has never had a real job outside politics and somehow retains ambitions to be PM one day despite his incompetence.

    I wouldn’t give him a job as a shit scraper and yet Labour seem fit to persevere with him. That Labour still hold this odious prick in such high regard says more about Ed Milliband’s leadership than it does about Balls.

    I think there are a lot of people in this country about to sit back and take much satisfaction watching this useless bastard receive what is frankly long overdue to him.

Seen Elsewhere

Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Labour’s Left and Right are Growing Restive | Staggers
Corrupt, Incompetent UN Has No Right to Lecture Us | Dan Hannan
Mirror’s Lazy Lie | Guardian
Hungary’s Heir to Thatcher | Conservative Woman
Farage and Salmond Both Want Outopia | David Aaronovitch
More Missing UKIP Money | Times
Church Should Fight Evil of Welfare Dependency | Stephen Glover
1 in 16 Pick Up Infections in Filthy NHS Hospitals | Mail
Let’s Get Evangelical | David Cameron

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads