May 25th, 2011

+ + + Brown Spotted In Westminster + + +

Isn’t it funny how Brown won’t turn up to Parliament to represent the people of Kirkcaldy and earn the £65,738, plus expenses and the pension, we pay him? Instead he goes around the world as he bids to restore his reputation, banking thousands for speeches while he does so. Yet Obama turns up, and he’s up there like a greyhound. Perhaps it was to complain that those DVDs didn’t work…


  1. 1
    Dalai Llama Ding Dong says:

    Where’s Billy?


    • 18
      Haley COmet says:

      on reading the only thing came to mind was the word bumsniffer


      • 22
        Iain Dale's Stunt Codpiece says:

        Am I the only on that’s sick of seeing Jill pay trailing around as Serjeant at Arms? We might as well have a pug dog with red dyed fur for all the dignity and decorum that she brings to our parliament!


        • 25
          Ivor Biggun says:

          Was the Queen there today?


        • 31
          pug dog with red dyed fur says:

          Steady on old bean!


          • David Laws Lib Dem fiddler says:

            So where is the effective rules to make him do the job he is paid to do?? McClegg was going to sort all this sort of thing out.


        • 101
          Tony Bliar says:

          Why aren’t you picking on me? I did plenty to f*** up this country too you know. Is it because I is orange?


          • Strewth says:

            because you were just a self-serving mendacious c-unt of a PM

            Brown, on the other hand, was an incompetent, deluded, drug-crazed, gold-flogging, mendacious c-unt of a PM


          • Fox News says:

            Fair and balanced.


          • Blony Tair says:

            I think I speak for both of us when I say that both Gordon and I have left an indelible stain on this country, and it’s reputation. My only redemption is that mine is at least, as you say, orange. Gordon’s however is altogether a more distasteful shade of skiddy s*** brun.


      • 228
        Norman Arse says:

        Brown is almost slavering for bum sex with Barry…


    • 41
      David - show me the money - Laws says:

      Hang on to something Chris, I’m behind you.


      • 43
        David Laws landlord says:

        It’s hang in there Chris, I’m behind you. Plus you’ve posted in the wrong topic.


        • 61
          David - show me the money - Laws says:

          That doesn’t sound any where near as much fun. And won’t people think I’m a crook by association if I say that?


          • David Laws landlord says:

            How do I say this …………………………………………………………………


    • 77
      Robert Mugabe says:

      David laws is innocent! And Hemming is not a hypocrite for outing someone for playing away. The fact that he himself played away numerous times is irrelevent!

      As I’ve often said, hypocrisy is a virtue.

      Solidarity with my Lib Dem brothers.

      No Shame

      By Any Means Necessary


    • 89
      Ropeman says:



      • 249
        Sicko says:

        Have to disagree; hanging him ‘seriously’ would mean it was a solemn and serious occasion with Huw or David intoning measured pieties.

        I say give the gig to Stuart Hall (he of grandiloquent footie commentary and It’s A Knockout fame), have ‘Yakkety Sax’ on a loop behind him and dress the executioner in a clown costume. Then speed it up and have a lot of WAGs chasing the funeral cortege.


    • 91
      • 103
        AC1 says:

        I can see an “OOoh Matron” speech bubble from Gordo. He makes Frankie Howerd look heterosexual.


    • 95
      Crikey says:

      What happened to the charity work? Or was that just another pre election sound bite?


      • 105
        genghiz the kahn says:

        Thought that that Hunt Brown wasn’t in favour of second jobs. Let’s face it he doesn’t even do his job as MP for Kirkcaldy.


  2. 2
    Man on the Clapham Omnibus says:

    Obama steering well clear of any kitchens, I’d wager


  3. 3
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Shame the house wasnt sitting….


  4. 4
    Dalai Llama Ding Dong says:

    Yet Obama turns up, and he’s up there like a greyhound….

    Let’s face it, Mc’huhne is the very definition of a brown-noser…


  5. 5
    Trend Shed says:

    Presumably a mangy one eyed greyhound, that snaps at other greyhounds, is disliked by the punters, has never won a race and yet somehow costs a fortune to run.


  6. 6
    Steve Miliband says:



  7. 7
    Mike Litorus says:

    Do you think he had to chase him round like a Benny Hill sketch again?

    (I heard that earlier somewhere but have forgotten already, THANKS NEW LABOUR EDUCATION POLICY FOR MY LACK OF CONCENTRATION)


    • 149
      Kay Burley on heat according to vet says:

      Do a search on “horse’s doofer” and Bob’s your avuncular murderous twat.


  8. 8
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Did he piss himself again at the prospect of seeing the anointed one.


  9. 9
    PM says:

    Uh oh, Jonah’s back. Expect an assassination attempt on Obama very soon.


  10. 10
    Village Idiot says:

    The expression you want, Guido, is “like a ferret up a drainpipe”.


  11. 11
    Hang them from lampposts says:

    Like most politicians, he is an internationalist, and only uses the British electorate in order to get access to the “world stage”.
    He reminds me of those socialist and liberal councillors who talk about “community” all the time but don’t know the names of their neighbours.


    • 81
      The Paragnostic says:

      They know the names of the ‘community leaders’ when postal voting comes around – Mr Aziz, Mr Uddin, Mr Patel…

      ‘Commmunity’ to Labour or Lib Dem does not mean the same as it does to the rest of us.


  12. 12
    Gordon Brown says:

    I would like to teach the world to sing


  13. 13
    Andie99uk says:

    Its probably because, like every elected politico in the UK, Brown is a Hunt.


    • 115
      President Rompypumpy (your leader for ever and ever, you can't get rid of me) says:

      What about the unelected politicos who rule the UK?

      (with the connivance of rotten little w@nkstains like Blair, Brown & Cameron et al).


  14. 14
    Foreigntory says:

    your obsession with Gordon given the horrendous damage Tony did, is quite tiring. Gordon is certainly not banking the money that Tony is so it seems odd to go on about that, too


    • 21
      Steve Miliband says:

      Turn left for Guradian CIF


    • 23
      pmy008 says:

      Blair’s not the one still getting paid by public money to do a job he can’t be arsed to do.


    • 97
      The Paragnostic says:

      Tony wasn’t the Chancellor, was he? All he cared about was whether Brown could produce enough cash for his grandiose and expensive expansion of the non-productive sector, and Brown was ultimately responsible for the growth of the client electorate while presiding over a doubling of dëbt even when times were ostensibly good.

      So yes, we hate Blair, but Brown was the real architect of our national destruction. Wouldn’t surprise me to find he is a descendant of Eva Braun – he has beggared Britain as well as her boyfriend ever managed.


      • 132
        Mrs E Hitler says:

        Husband, actually. And we didn’t have kids. Addy was always too tired. But if we had had kids, they’d have been normal human beings, not c’unts like Brown.


    • 218
      Anonymous says:

      Tony Bliar came into power with grand ideas to modernize Britain’s public services but he quickly realized Brown wouldn’t let him. So instead of sacking him, he looked around and thought the economy seemed to be doing okay so he foolishly left Brown to it and went off and started as many wars as he could. Eventually Brown decided to stop funding the wars – but keep fighting them – so that he could spend the (borrowed) money on non jobs in the virtually unreformed public services. End result; Bliar = multi millionaire war criminal. Brown = clusterfucked economy. Doubles all round.


  15. 15
    Steve Miliband says:

    Who Introduced Barry? I didn’t see anyone at the lectern, yet I heard a voice.


    • 49
      Dick the Prick says:

      Mr Squeeker. Why do so many politicians smile like utter gimps when meeting Obama? Sure, he’s a good lad if you’re not a US citizen but sycophancy has its limits.


      • 60
        Ivor Biggun says:

        It’s an old British tradition that the Squeaker is a bum sniffing dwarf.

        I tell I lie, it’s not an old British tradition at all, but the Squeaker is a bum sniffing dwarf, at least for now.


        • 215
          Anonymous says:

          Would this be the same Speaker that’s siding with the greedy injuncting lawyers over our very own elected parliamentarians?
          Mr Speaker needs to remember exactly what his job is and who pays his huge salary and expenses.


    • 56
      John Berkowitz says:



  16. 16
    Mike Litorus says:

    BTW, who the fuck listens to the Hoon, let alone pay him to lecture them? Unless his speeches are titled “How to fuck up everything.”


  17. 17
    Trinny says:

    How does that Pope, Mandela, Thatcher joke go….?


  18. 19
    pmy008 says:

    Not surprised. Brown is a waste of taxpayers money and I wish that the SNP would try and get him recalled so that they could challenge him for his seat. Not that I’m a fan of the SNP, but it would be very amusing!


    • 32
      the last quango in paris says:


      a joke – a liberty and a complete pixx take! I thought they were clearing up politics and this lazy good for nothing mong can swan about charging us for doing fa and when theres a party rock up.

      Bugger off Brown.


  19. 24
    Matt says:

    So typical of Gordon Brown. Rarely spotted at the House of Commons, but he turns up when the House isn’t sitting!


    • 106

      Indicating, perhaps, a greater degree of self-awareness than we normally credit him with, that he is an incompetent arsehole and fails every time he opens his mouth.


  20. 26
    Gooey Blob says:

    Brown is probably the only politician on the planet who is more self-centred than Obama. The thing is, despite his shortcomings and barely-concealed anglophobia, a lot of people actually in this country still like Obama. You can’t say the same of Brown.


    • 140
      Archer Karcher says:

      They like Obama because everything he does, is filtered through the prism of the lying BBC, who caricature his opponents as racists or closet racists or unreformed backward looking rednecks and project Obama, as some sort of demi-god, sent down from heaven to tame and ‘europeanise’ the ‘Great Satan’ America.


    • 246
      Quantrill says:

      Well I don’t: What was that MLK type speech all about? And the FS with him in enormous fly away mini skirts preaching to (our??) immigrant kids?
      Holy JC.


  21. 30
    Gordon Brown says:

    I have used all the toilet roll in Kirkaldly


  22. 33
    alex weir says:

    It gives me tremendous pleasure that this extra-judicial killer is not getting the IMF job


    • 47
      Gene Poole says:

      In spite of bribing most of Africa with our money to garner support for the job


      • 193
        The President of Uganda says:

        We are still waiting on the mosquito nets he promised us. He can shove that IMF job right up his kirkaldy.


  23. 34
    Dogsbreath says:

    The Whole issue is slightly tacky and unwholesome.

    A President under the cosh at home gets out of the kitchen to visit a dead cert unelected half baked Government with its arse out of its trousers who gush around him like a bunch of soppy schoolgirls.

    The press pack dragged along behind like dog eared teddy bears, gonks and assorted squeaky toys.


    • 64
      Anonymous says:

      Meanwhile hundreds of Americans die in tornadoes.


      • 98
        Anonymous says:

        Can you imagine what the BBC would say about Cameron if he was out the country and a similar tragedy occurred here. Christ they were bad enough when it rained a lot and no one was killed.


        • 158
          Kay Burley on heat according to vet says:

          Or if it had occurred during a Republican president’s visit?


      • 110
        The Paragnostic says:

        That’s just the Weathermen – 40 years on, the flapping of their butterfly wings has come to fruition.


        • 124

          “You don’t need Bob Dylan to know which way the President blows.”


          • The Paragnostic says:

            Look who’s back in town
            Ain’t nobody but Gordon James Brown
            All you boys better run for cover
            If you don’t a-wanna be a sphincter broken lover.


          • Missed your vocation, Paragnostic. You could also have “Too much of nothing”, “You ain’t goin’ nowhere” or “Nothing was delivered”; all from the Basement Tapes…


          • Μіssеd yoυr vocаtіon, Раrаgnostіc. Υoυ coυld аlso hаvе ” Τoo mυch of nothіng”, “Υoυ аіn’t goіn’ nowhеrе” or “Νothіng wаs dеlіvеrеd”; аll from thе Βаsеmеnt Таpеs…


  24. 36
    Wan Gok says:

    Brown arse and his bint turned up at the State Banquet both looking like the penguin from Batman.
    Couple of self serving arseholes.


  25. 38
    Inspector Knacker says:

    Employment Tribunal considers fate of Met officer in sexual abuse shame !


  26. 40
    Gordon Brown says:

    Angel Delight is a powdered dessert product produced in the United Kingdom. It is designed to be mixed and whisked with milk to create a mousse-like sweet dessert.

    I like Angel Delight and I like people who like Angel Delight


  27. 42
    Gene Poole says:

    The reason he was there is that he doesn’t give a flying f**k what you or I think, he’s a self obsessed hypocrit and a disgrace to Parliament. I wish the SNP would go for him for the reasons already stated.


  28. 45
    ssdb says:

    Christ on a Bike! Read that Newham link in the side bar!

    “the council’s salary bill during 2010/11 was £380,562, second only to Sheffield with £504,585″

    So Newham and Sheffield pay nearly £900,000 in union wages A YEAR!!!! It also says

    “The total salary bill for full-time union officials from the council respondents came to £35 million in 2010/11, plus a further £2 million for providing unions with additional resources. ”

    £37 million to sit on their fat arses and talk drivel!


  29. 46
    Brown preparing for the IMF. says:

    Today I will be learning how to count. Leave me alone I have sums to do.
    Can I be the new presenter for Countdown? Please?


    • 50
      Gene Poole says:

      No but you can be test pilot for the new gallows we are building to deal with the rest of your mates


  30. 48
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Does anyone remeber when he met President Bush and went for a spin in that golf buggy , that made me laugh.


  31. 52
    the last quango in paris says:

    How can we complain?


  32. 54
    Gordon Brown says:

    Why do birds suddenly appear….


    • 230
      Culcha Vulcha says:

      Maybe they are naturally attracted to carrion?

      PS: You forgot your question mark.


  33. 57
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    His voters get what they deserve.


  34. 62
    Killie Krankie says:

    Apparently it is perfectly reasonable for Brown to do what he likes – it’s his business – and if the voters of Kirkcaldy don’t like it they can vote him out at the next election (whenever that is ) – MP for Gloucester says so


    • 119
      the last quango in paris says:

      I wonder if Brown has the sign saying “you don’t have to be mad to work here but it helps” over his desk?


  35. 63
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    Oh good.

    More cover, smoke & mirrors for rusty Dave & Hague to slip Baroness Ashton more British taxpayer cash out of sight of the electorate.

    Reckless amendment voted down – there are only 30 Conservatives in Parliament.

    Why do they bother staying in Blue Labour?

    Why not have the courage of their obvious convictions & abandon Dave & his neo socialist Guardian reading BBC loving chums?

    Rusty Dave – OUT.


    • 74
      Nutty Nut Cake (Mrs) says:

      As nutty as a nutcake, as usual.


    • 121
      The Paragnostic says:

      Cast Iron always rusts when wet, RRW(M) – time for David Davis to make a few stainless steel promises, perhaps?


  36. 65
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    I wonder what the jock mong said to Barry?

    “I’m still Prime Mentalist Mr Osama, don’t listen to that David bloke, I’ll be waiting for you in the kitchen at Buckingham house tonight”

    Obama to his security “Get me the fuck away from this twat”


    • 78
      the last quango in paris says:

      “can I be the head of the KLF?”


    • 80
      Gordon Brown says:

      G G Good speech Mr Omaha. Definitely KLM.


    • 86
      Shock,Awe and Total indifference says:

      I noted that a gurning/grinning Brown was carrying on a seemingly one-way conversation with Blair who had drawn the short straw of having to sit next to him(Brown had been placed at the end of the row to minimise the problem).Blair just nodded his head from time to time whilst looking decidely pissed off.Meanwhile Cherie was chatting up Dave….. still canvassing for that peerage luv ?…Baroness Booth of Sefton does have a certain ring to it


  37. 66
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    I wish the BBC would stop putting graphics over Laura Kuenssberg’s boobs. Putting me right off my stroke.

    What Obama speech?


    • 79
      I.M. Golightly says:

      ’tis most annoying – perhaps they could overlay the graphics on her huge expanse of forehead instead.

      Still can’t quite see Ms. Kuenssberg’s charms though (hang, isn’t that your problem too?) – am still pining for the long lost Jenny Scott of the Daily Brillotics show.


  38. 67
    the last quango in paris says:

    Guido weeks worth of caption comp here:


  39. 68
    annette curton says:

    Look at the rapture on the face, reminds me of Shaun of the Dead.


  40. 71
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    Nothing would give me greater pleasure than to see Gordon Brown turned down for a series of increasingly desperate “international jobs” over the next 4 years, to the point where he has to decide whether to stand again in the 2015 election, or just take ignominious retirement and possibly a part-time job sweeping the aisles in Kirkcaldy Tesco.

    The IMF has already been ruled out by Cameron and Osborne, but there’s still Kinnockio’s replacement, Ashton’s replacement, Ban Ki Moon’s replacement. He’d be an utter disaster at any of those jobs (as indeed are the three incumbents).


    • 75
      Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

      Actually if the jocks would all fuck off (they won’t as they are gutless) he’d not even have that job.

      He’s a waste of human skin


    • 134
      The Paragnostic says:

      You forgot the WTO gig that’s coming up soon, though apparently the Dark Prince has his beady eye on that one.


    • 169
      Maximus says:

      Look, isn’t it apparent yet that McJessie is not going to get a “job” from anybody – ever. The world and its dog know that he’s a complete mong with the reverse-midas touch, and not to be countenanced under any circumstances.


    • 192
      Shock,Awe and Total indifference says:

      Unlikely that Brown will secure any such role in any of the NGO/EU roles as Cameron/Osborne’s opinion of Brown is I suspect echoed in most captals of the World by most poltical leaders from the USA to China..and the absolute clincher is that if your own government doesn’t back you or recommend yu and in fact does just the opposite then you’ve no chance whatsoever so we can all sleep more easily knowing that Brown will be let nowehere near any position of power ever again


  41. 84
    Sarah the bore Brown says:

    My hero. My nutcase.


  42. 85
    EdMiliband says:

    I was convincing at PMQ’s again today. Oddly quiet House of Commons though


  43. 89
    Chris Huhne says:

    Barack Obama and David Cameron hosted a barbecue at 10 Downing Street this afternoon where they agreed to turn up the heat on Gaddafi.

    Fucking wierdos, fancy calling your barbecue Gaddafi ?


  44. 102
    Vicky P. says:

    Was Hune there or helping the police with their enquiries?


    • 112
      Chris Huhne says:

      I was there cracking jokes as per usual

      Prince Philip was asked for his impression of the President of the United States.

      He started to sing “Mammy” by Al Jolson.


  45. 109

    Those videos.
    Comedy Gordon gold.

    1. Crash
    2. The Gold Rush
    3. One flew over the cuckoo’s nest
    4. Bean
    5. Psycho
    6. The usual Suspects
    7. Forrest Gump
    8. Dr Strangelove
    9. Unforgiven
    10. Twelve monkeys


  46. 110
    Drop the daisy cutter loves Quentin Letts. says:

    I am amazed that any one would would be interested in listening to such rubbish let alone pay to hear it.


  47. 116
    Kevin T says:

    How well did he represent them when he was chancellor and PM though? How many surgeries did he do? For that matter, how many does Cameron do, or Osborne, or Miliband? And what about Bercow’s constituents? How are they represented by their MP? This is why a presidential system would be fairer. The people on top just look after the country and every constituency has an MP looking after them.


  48. 117
    Anonymous says:

    FFS why is that Hunt still alive?


    • 171
      Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

      He and the Chief Constable of Essex are just finalising a joint statement to declare his innocence. Jahbulon.


  49. 120
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I think it is a disgrace, Outrageous, An insult and a piss-take of democrcy. It shames our once great nation for this to happen, Never should this happen again , it has left us looking stupid and extremly weak.Heads need to roll for this!, Not having the first test match of the summer at Lords has really let the country down.


  50. 128
    Kevin Bollox says:

    Gordon Brown is a little shit. He should fuck off before someone knocks the other eye out of his grinning skull


  51. 129

    Surely not turning up to do a single day’s work for his job is breach of contract or duty or trust and the parliamentary authorities have an obligation to refer the matter and have him ejected from the house for failure to attend.

    Or if they have failed to do, surely this makes them unsuitable to pay any MPs, and their entire budget should be frozen to prevent any further payments, until there is a public inquiry into why they failed to take action in this case, and changes to their processes to ensure that no-one gets away with it in the future.

    The people of Kirkcaldy have been denied their right to democratic representation. Any system that allows their MP to veto that right is an ass. His example could bring down the whole system of representative democracy having proved that in its current form it’s open to such abuses.

    Mind you it will be funny when the last PM is the first MP to be recalled, once that legislation goes through.


    • 160
      Selohesra says:

      If the people of Kirkaldy elected him then they deserve everything they get – clearly deluded fools voting for extra hand outs of OPM.


      • 219
        50 Calibre says:

        Right on the money. As dim as a Toc H lamp, the lot of them. No sympathy. They gave him the job…


    • 172
      Arsed says:

      The problem is there is still no right of recall. The Cabinet Office can’t quite decide what to do to minimize any impact it may have. The present government have let the people down on this now the expenses dilemma is quitening down. They hope we will all forget about it. They, after all, are ‘in charge’ and we must just do as they tell us


  52. 131
    Anonymous says:

    Perhaps it was to hear Obama congratulating him on the value of his partnership in averting a financial crisis in 2009/10.


  53. 135
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Brown and Blair, the twat brothers.
    Miliband and Balls, the twat brothers.
    Harman and Cooper, the twat sisters.
    The Eagle twins, no shampoo here.


  54. 137
    Counsel for the Prosecution says:

    THE estranged wife of Cabinet Minister Chris Huhne has admitted signing his speeding form to spare him a ban – but only after he “bullied” her into “performing an unusual sexual act on him involving a dildo”

    I rest my case M’Lud


  55. 154
    wotson says:

    do not forget that he is the son of the manse and has a huge moral compass. shame on you


  56. 159
    Pointy finger says:

    Just goes to show what a farce our so called democracy is.


  57. 162
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    How are the book sales going?


  58. 168
    Chelsea Flower Show says:

    what have we done to deserve Alan Titmarsh?


  59. 173
    Gordon says:

    Sarah, can I have some more of that KY Jelly for tea tonight?


  60. 175
    Gordon Brown, Economic Genius with a Phd in History says:

    There can be no mystery about my appearance at Westminster. My Buddy, Barrack Hussein, asked me for a consultation for three reasons, as I am still Prime Minister:
    1. To give him economic advice.
    2. To ask if I was still available to save the world.
    3. To ask me to consider becoming Head of the IMF.
    I answered yes to all three questions.


    • 216
      Gordon Brown says:

      And also to give him my CV, which I slipped into his hand as he was thanking me for saving the world.


  61. 182
    Disenfranchised Kirkcaldy Voter says:

    Waas Gordon Broon up tae in London? Is the Hoose sutting?


  62. 190
    Hang The Bastards says:

    What a Grade-A arse-licker !


  63. 202
    Lobster Throttler says:

    Where the hell has Martin Day got to? has he shit himself once too often and got flushed away?


  64. 212
    The Very Reverend Canaan Banana says:

    Zero the Kenyan and Jonah McBroon – which is one is the mank fly and which one is the coil of warm shit?


  65. 217
    A Madison Avenue Coke User says:

    Seing as this siye is about bers and whiskey how come the Jameson ad does not appear on the right hand side?


  66. 220
    Nursie, nursie says:

    It was noticeable how sour Brown looked. Bliar at least grinned for all he was worth. Maybe Brown had an armageddon moment? Milliband (the invisible man) nowhere to be seen… qed, useless box of new Liebour spanners. No wonder, Obama didn’t want to play table tennis with them!


  67. 221
    robbie says:

    The only charitable explanation is that he’s still lobbying for the IMF job or continuing his career as a public sector salaried celebrity stalker.


  68. 225
    Xopher says:

    I’ve got Brown stains on my pants – but – at least they’re mine!


  69. 235
    P_Dorff says:

    One for the older viewers; one of Dick Emery’s characters was a vicar, did he leave the prop teeth to Brown?


  70. 236
    not now cato says:

    Brown rushed down to London to show off his new Oirish accent to O’Bama?

    (bbc delenda est)


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