Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View
How Mervyn King Lost Bank Battle War | WSJ
BBC Corporation Tax Horror Story | IEA
Sally Bercow Judgement in Full | Mr Justice Tugendhat
Commies Blame Capitalism For Terror Attack | The Commentator
Lord Black v Press Regulation | Guardian
Osborne’s Complacency | FT
DWP’s Welfare Failings | Isabel Hardman
Get Used to Coalitions | David Aaronovitch
Woolwich a Showcase in the Banality of Evil | Fraser Nelson
The Enemy Within | Max Hastings
Muslim Led Military-Style Free School Needed | Toby Young
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Ed Balls stretches credulity by claiming he isn’t ambitious…
“I would love to be part of Ed’s Labour government but what I do next for me is not an all-consuming passion. I’m more bothered, in a personal sense, about getting to grade 8 piano by the time I’m 50.”
Bill Quango MP says:
Ned Flanders – Clegg
Lisa Simpson – Natalie Bennett
Milhouse – Hilary Benn
Martin Prince – Andy Burnham
Edna Krabappel – Luciana Berger
Crazy Cat Lady – Glenda jackson
Comic book guy – John Prescott
Carl – Chucka
Lenny – Philip Hammond
Willie – Eric joyce
Poochie – Gordon Brown
Reverend Lovejoy – Tony Blair
Iain Dale and Mad Nads.
Much funnier than the cartoon
The seeds of democracy planted in Eyeraq all those years ago by President Dubya have finally spread to Palestine.
How did those peperoni eating forces of the paragon of democracies in the Middle East react? Just like the forces of all the other dictators and tyrants (Quaddaffi, Assad, Mubarak, Yemeni President, Bahreni King) in the Arab lands surrounding them – shoot the Fred Flintstones and Barney Rubbles!
Freedom and democracy will prevail!
Bin Laden’s legacy the fight for the right to free pornography!
Dimwit, they had elections years ago. They elected a bunch of terrorists, and now reap the whirlwind.
It couldn’t happen to a more deserving bunch.
Look more closely, Ostrich.
The Syrian Palestinians still remember after 60 years. What elections did they have under the Assad dynasty, idiot.
Exactly – Assad kills ayrabs, Hussein kills ayrabs, Al Saud kills ayrabs, UK kills ayrabs, Obama kills ayrabs, ayrabs kill ayrabs – hell, just get the Chinks involved and we’ve got a full house!
Is it the IMF boss and the chamber maid?
Chamber maid? Perhaps the 22ish year old journalist (who is now ~32).
And in case you’ve missed the details:
http://www.mediapart.fr/journal/international/150511/french-political-scene-plunged-turmoil-after-strauss-kahn-sex-charge-ar?page_article=4
Looks like he is a dodgy old git who’s got away with it because of an over-respectful attitude to “authority” (/establishment) and privacy laws.
Agree S#4. the District Attorney will need ordnance steel balls to nail this man. Innocent until proved guilty of course.
I was talking about in France.
Fact of the day: DSK was allowed to board any Air France flight, whenever he liked. No questions asked.
@sockpuppet – that’s kinda fair enough. The esteem with which the French revere their Republic is truly staggering so their senior statesmen, and he was their chancellor, take on a veneration the Brits reserve for their royal family. If you get the chance to watch The Last Mitterrand on Film 4, i’d highly recommend it.
No, I don’t like scary movies.
It’s really good, honest not invent.
Champagne Socialists taking advantage of their positions AGAIN!
“Evil Tories Kill Butterflies” – Guiardian Exclusive
http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2011/may/16/butterfly-revival-threatened-by-cuts
She went to the bedroom and a naked man rushed from the bathroom to the bedroom. She apologized, the law enforcement official said, and tried to leave.
But according to the official, the man chased her, grabbed her and shut the door, locking it. He then pulled her toward the bedroom, the official said, and tried to attack her there.
He dragged her to the bathroom, the official added, and forced her to perform oral sex. The police said the woman eventually escaped from the suite and reported the attack to other hotel personnel, who called 911.
http://www.nytimes.com/2011/05/16/nyregion/maid-picks-imf-chief-as-attacker-in-lineup.html?_r=1&hp
No danger of that happening if brown gets his wish. Better check if the beard owns a chambermaids costume !
I’ve a feeling this woman’s life is about to be ruined as Kahn and his lawyers twist events and make him the victim and she the culprit.
Her allegations are costing some very rich and powerful people a lot of money. Unless she also has a top law team then she is toast
It’s time the ‘rich and powerful’ were punished.
Good idea. Why’s no-one thought of that before?
Dunno – has all the elements of a classic honey trap.
Look into the story in detail (and worse- of previous presidents), and you might never complain about British politicians again.
Hey Charlie, you still alive? I thought they sat you ona that electric chair?
Quite. This woman has obviuosly been paid (maybe by ze Germans) to discredit a great man of the Left, who brought peace and the euro to millions. After all, she is black and a single mother so therefore she would easily take a bribe.
Strauss-Khan had a spat with the ECB last week over Greek bailout II… the IMF wanted evidence of Greece paying off more of its debts before the IMF were prepared to put more money into the pot.
And then a few days later, he’s caught in a honey trap? Hmmm. I’ve no doubt that he’s guilty as charged, but the timing’s very convenient for the EU isn’t it? Gets rid of Sarkozy’s rival and an obstruction to the ECB’s plans.
To slime as high as he has in the IMF/french politics he must have a high degree of animal cunning. Even if the story about the 22 year old is true (and once someone is charged all sorts of stories emerged from the woodwork. If Guido hisself were charged in similar fashion probably some woman would contact the press to say he tried to grope her tits back at Uni–the press would be trying hard to find something if the story was high-profile enough) it seems very unlikely that this man would run naked to fling himself on the maid and think he could get away with it, French egotist or not.
That is a first – a Socialist wanting “…evidence of Greece paying off more of its debts…”! Usual reaction is fill your boots boys (and girls).
Sociopaths surround themselves with people who depend on them for their position.
Any sociopath would try and get as many flawed people into jobs of power, and protect them until they were no longer useful to them.
the 22 year old’s story isn’t being actively promoted by the media.
She made the allegation on late night TV many years ago. Plenty of old links about the story, even one from friday in the guardian.
well post the link
Let me tell you the woman does not have a chance. The police will stitch it up, as they did for me, and refuse to prosecute on the grounds of one person’s word against another. Anyway what is wrong in what he did? The woman is not underage and he is a politician.
Definetly NOT Jackie Smith!
Try harder Britain!
http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2011-05-14/osama-bin-ladens-porn-and-muslim-hypocrisy-on-sex/full/#
Cameron cancels Nimrod – British ships now completely unprotected & reliant on Foreign aid:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/defence/8515781/British-ships-protected-by-borrowed-US-spy-plane-in-Libya.html
Will Rich & Mark ever do a funny original cartoon
No.
Basically, then, there is no news concerning Huhne and we are trying to keep the pot boiling before everybody loses interest.
Mind you, I think he did it, because he’s the kind of chap who would. He’s a Greenie, so he believes that the end justifies the means. Any amount of lying is permissible in the service of Mother Gaia, or Mr Christopher Huhne.
Cartoon does not make sense – is the woman his ex wife in which case he would not be groping her or is it his new woman in which case he would have no reason to suspect she was wired. Try again! – on second thoughts please don’t
Mark and Rich are usually on the money. This is a good cartoon.
Outstandingly mediocre.
So now Mark& Rich are now complimenting themselves disguised as a dildo.
Damned with faint praise, eh.
I’m with the Dildo.
I was wondering why D-S-K looked just like Chris Huhne did last week, until i saw the tag.
According to you he was going to resign yesterday.
Getting shriller as you straddle the barbed wire.
Just character assassination. Attack him over what he’s done, not what you wish he’d done.
You new here?
Well if his ministerial career crashes he can always go back to being a second rate graudian journalist and know that sallyallley (according to her twitters) really rather likes him – guess that says everything.
There are first rate Grauniad journos?
Fucking hell, I thought I was saved this crayola crapola stuff this week.
I thought we were going to be spared this week, next week and every week.
Despite their monumental exposure and clearly udoubted talent, R&M haven’t yet been snapped up anywhere else.
I live in hope.
Perhaps there’s an opening in up and coming Azerbaijan for them.
Song title for you Guido
Pink Floyd
Dark side of the Huhne !
SHAGGER-KAHN. I feel for you.
Freddy and the Dreamers You were Maid for me !
Octopuses hardon.
The new seekers “I’d like to pop this up your ring “
Octopuses also have eight testicles.
What a beautiful day for Jumping out of your shower with an erection and shouting “surprise” at the maid.
Two Ds
Errr three actually…
If you can still get it up without the blue pills Kenny.
“Just checking for wires dear”
well you wont find any
I Wax
All done yesterday !
Do try to keep up you dopey tart !
You sexist! It took her a day to understand it. She is blonde you know
She has got to be the biggest waste of time ever. Stupid woman.
Show us yer bum.
I think we see enough of him already.
Why on earth does anyone give this idiot the time of day. She only gets gigs on Question Time and 5 Live because she is married to the midget speaker. She is a complete lightweight fool.
I think you are being more than gererous there, Jane.
The Bercow’s are a well suited couple. He’s a berk and she’s a cow.
My client,Chris Huhne vehemently denies ever having made this comment
“I’ve never known how to take the Mother-in-law, so I usually vary it, sometimes doggy, sometimes missionary and every now and then up the arse…. “
Is it Huhne or Kahn? Or bogof week?
Sarah….can I do my ploppy now!!
Christopher Paul-Huhne was born in affluent west London to a Labour-supporting actress and Tory businessman.
The ‘Paul’ was dropped some time between Westminster School and Oxford University where he studied Politics, Philosophy and Economics, grew his hair, wore a beret, befriended radical Marxists and spoke of one day becoming Labour Prime Minister – indeed, he dismissed Liberals as ‘intense, grey-looking people unlikely to be hampered by any formulated policies’.
Even as a student, his principles seemed a little, well, flexible.
He helped organise a university sit-in and was photographed wielding a park bench as his Marxist pals battered their way into a university building. But he was one of the few students able to afford his own car – a London black cab that he could drive in bus lanes (an early flirtation with bending traffic rules, perhaps?).
So we can look forward to Charlie Gilmore being in government in 30 years time. These people should have been sent down without their degree at the time so they couldn’t do any further damage.
You can’t hold us back we are all of the same ilk. I call us ‘Politicopaths,’ meaning we become so obsessed with power that we believe we can get away with anything, and most of the time we do. Just look at me.
In short he is a privileged twat who intends to remain privileged while the rest of us are plunged into darkness and poverty by the green shite he and his pals are pushing. I hope this car caper destroys him utterly.
Essex-based Tory peer Lord Hanningfield is due to go on trial accused of fiddling his House of Lords expenses.
The 70-year-old faces six charges of false accounting.
It is alleged that between March 2006 and May 2009 he submitted claim forms to the House of Lords which he knew were false.
The charges are said to relate to overnight allowances for accommodation in London when records allegedly showed he was driven to his home near Chelmsford, Essex.
The trial is due to take place at Chelmsford Crown Court.
Lord Hanningfield was charged – under his name Paul White – in February last year
sky news 94% of NHS managers
think the NHS reforms are a bad idea
Yes i agree
where else will you get £800,000 for doing fuck all ?
94% of turkeys think Christmas is a bad idea, too.
You don’t imagine that, whatever happens, they’re going to cut the number of NHS managers? These guys have had more than 60 years to entrench themselves behind bureaucratic minefields, barbed war and reinforced concrete. They support each other. They are untouchable.
Only customer choice can wheedle them out.
That, and a machete.
I can choose my Manager?
When you can choose who provides your care (and thus who gets paid for it).
Customer choice?
Let me see. I have cancer. There is only one cancer unit. Because of Internal Health Service Politics its crap but nobody challenges that until the dead stack up so its that or nothing. Which do I choose?
No surprise the global economy is up shit creek, when there is a lecherous old Socialist in charge of its bank.
he only tried to leave a deposit in her box !
The BBC are giving this story legs. It currently appears on the BBC news page half way down under politics, advertised as MP makes Huhne complaint. Why can’t they just leave the man alone, it’s clearly something from a long time ago when he had no hope of ever being a minister.
Hmmm. Careful. Glass houses…
Isn’t Nick Robinson the worst BBC chief political editor in memory; he so often barks up the wrong tree that it’s embarrassing. His attempt to change the emphasis on the Huhne scandal this morning ( ‘Today’ naturally) was so inept. Nick, a serious criminal offence may have been committed by a man who is now a cabinet minister; it is not a political issue ( ie his LibDem rivals plotting against him, or an ex-wife hoping to become more prominent in party politics–a bit of a slur that Nick), it is a law and order issue—and if you can’t see that Mr R. then really you are in the wrong job.
I fear you are wasting your time. The ineptitude of people like Rick Nobinson is matched only by their own self-importance. Their arrogance is like a shield, protecting them from all criticism, constructive or otherwise.
It is a law and order issue just like the ignored when Jackie Smith had parliament illegally searched
And tonight, Toenails is in charge of a “social experiment” on bbc1 where a community near Preston is allowed to let everything go to ratshit (well, dogshit anyway) to demonstrate the effects of the viscious cuts.
what is it with politicions that they cant keep thee mouths shut, We had the “cabs for hire” BS , then Vince and now Hunt.
Democorcy is so over-rated!
Three reasons to respect the Liberal Democrats
Chris Huhne
Chris Huhne
Chris Huhne
Rich and Mark haven’t worked out where her right arm is supposed to be.
Well done! We’ll just have to call it the stumpy one…
For all those that slag of the cartoons as shit (Yes i am one) , this is Guido doing his part for the “Big Socitey”, He is keeping two unemployable “Cartoonists” of the dole. I for am proud of you Guido for buying into Daves “Big socitey”
My goodness – does Guido pay Mark and Ritchie?
Thats the rumour….
With the Caption Contest prizes, no doubt.
I couldnt possibly comment
That will be the day…
Tory peer Lord Hanningfield to face trial over expenses
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-13409698
Whats the score now? 8-2
Yes Billy, and only another 1390 of the thieving troughers (or thereabouts) to go…..
Its a start.
In Politics, like comedy, timing is everything.
It was an act of crass stupidity for Cameron, (The Liberal cuckoo firmly entrenched in the Conservative nest), to choose this weekend to come out in clear and fervent support for Huhne and his lunatic policies.
If Her Majesty’s Opposition can now do its job, defend the jobs of the present and future workers it purports to represent, and ensure that Parliament properly debates the Conservatives determined attempt to commit economic hara kiri, they will do the country and themselves a huge service.
The putative failures of judgement regarding Forestry privatisation and NHS reform are totally dwarfed by Cameron’s own personal failure. The leader has shown by example that making a complete cock up requires a degree of skill and determination that is quite beyond the abilities of his Ministers.
Calm down dear.
You’re an idiot.
I wouldnt blame DC , More NickClegg as he is the leader of the Lib Dems, Dave is leader of the Tories, why do you think you dont see much of Alan Duncan and Bill Wiggin?
There are more tory mps to choose from so can easily hide the worst out of view – poor old Nick has to promote whatever shite he was landed with irrespective of talent or indeed probity
Cabinet ministers are always going to be attacked and have accusations of all sorts of wrong-doing hurled at them. If any Prime Minister of any party sacked every minister upon the mere accusation or inference of wrong-doing, then there would be no ministers left.
IF it becomes established as a fact that Huhne conspired to pervert the cuase of justice by pressuring another person to lie and accept penalty points which rightly should have gone to Huhne, then his position as a Minister, and indeed as an MP (in my opinion) would be entirely untenable.
At the moment these are merely allegations with a large degree of supporting evidence which should be tested in court.
IF Huhne is charged with a crime, then he should stand down. IF he is then proven not guilty, then he may, unfortunately, be available to be reinstated. IF he is found guilty, then he should go to prison.
If he didn’t do anything wrong why has he gone into hiding. You would think he’d be all over the media issuing categoric denials and accusing the press of making up stories.
There’s definitely something to this.
What happened to “deny, deny, deny”…
Ah yes… I see… sorry…
“If any Prime Minister of any party sacked every minister upon the mere accusation or inference of wrong-doing, then there would be no ministers left.”
What a radical idea! When do we start?
Frankly Huhne knows as much about energy as I do about the politics and economics of outer Mongolia.
He is, actually WORSE than useless, because is intellectual laziness and overweening vanity force him to consider that its not actually his job to find out, either.
Frankly we would have a better energy picture, and a lower carbon one, if politicians simply taxed carbon and washed their hands of interfering in it beyond that. And simply let the Market and the engineers employed by commercial companies get on and do what they do est. Calculate the cheapest and most efficient way of supplying it.
Why would you tax CO2? If anything Farmers should be taxed to subsidise petrol that is providing them with Airborne plant-food.
If Her Majesty’s Opposition can now do its job….
A very big IF, if you ask me! Anyway, what ever Macaroon and Co. does cannot be as bad as anything that Labour would do.
I need a job now, i could draw funnier cartoon`s.
Any cartoon of the FA premiership sanctioned toolkit when opened has no hammers in it?
Guido should check out the Fenbeagle — http://fenbeagleblog.wordpress.com/
He’s the master and commander of Huhne attack.
Quite a good likeness of Strauss-Kahn I’d say. First class.
Just think of it as two for the price of one.
Huhne and his wife or Kahn and his maid.
Is Dominique Strauss-Kahn a maid-up name?
+1
+1
Hell hath no fury like a scorned woman. If the allegations are found to be correct, his career is finished. I will not lament his departure. Another puffed-up politician promoted way beyond his nominal pay grade. Despite our reputation to the contrary, the public is broadly accepting of marital infidelities. Perverting the course of justice is a wholly different matter. It is the cornerstone of our legal system and must be upheld without fear or favour. Those who seek to support his position by playing down the nature of this alleged offence are as complicit as the individual himself.
Yes and no, normal people would have he book thrown at em, The elite seem to get away with murder.
They certainly do.
I agree. Strauss-Huhne is finished.
Said the corrupt MP
Never mind the last weekend:
He’s stuffed if previously covered up allegations are brought to the fore.
Rather ironic that Huhne called Clegg “calamity”. It’s been one calamity after another for the Huhney Monster.
Can you transfer points by wire?
Who cares, pension is in the bag by now …
What is his pension worth after just over a year of doing a fucking abysmal job and behaving like an utter c’unt?
Chris Huhne could be scrapped, Nick Clegg to say
Chris Huhne could be scrapped and replaced by Billy Bowden, Nick Clegg will announce tomorrow.
Question is, when Huhne is eventually ejected, will he be replaced by a LimpDim or a Tory…?
Bet it’ll be Tim Yeo. The one who likes wind farms but not in his back yard.
http://order-order.com/tag/nimby/
Answer: David Laws..
I wanna be head of the KLF!
You’re fairly ancient but you certainly can’t be justified.
Brown wouldnt be keen on burning one million quid.
I think he would feel that only a million shows a distinct lack of ambition.
Pass the meow meow, I want out of here!
Britainistan is ours now. You be goings. Don’t be comings back to our land.
Sarah’s definitely a Mu Mu.
i Hear there is a KFC that will take you on Gordon.
Free Hot wings for all the social layabouts, discounts for immigrants – to be paid for by the next generation, and the one after that, and the one after that come to think of it.
oh and it will be at your minimum wage.
Only problem you may have is that you do actually have to turn up for this job
Speak for yourself – I don’t want him either
Sanders, not Saunders! Show my fellow fast food honcho respect!
I think you’ve burnt a lot more than a million quid…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K_Foundation_Burn_a_Million_Quid
You told us you were going back to teaching Gordon. Well go and do it. Remember ‘those who can, do, those who can’t teach’ and you certainly can’t.
Bbc news showed nhs bod who said he trusts Cameron over nhs reform.
Shit that should have been filled in the Thames – how did this misinformation get out????
Where do I start. Filed…. oh I give up.
It’s best not to start. Just take deep breaths and count to ten.
Educated under labour – what do you expect???
Shagger Khan
Chris Huhne is innocent until proven guilty. Everyone is forgetting that. People are attacking a fine and honourable politician over something which may, or may not, have happened.
Chris is currently working on the most radical green bill this country will ever have seen.
Ignore the sniping and the vested interests Chris. Ignore Nick’s attack dogs. You are doing fine.
That was funny Hee hee!
*giggles…*
Good job the economy doesn’t need jobs, employment, electricity or transport…
It doesn’t, you’re right, there’ll be no economy left soon.
Whatever else, he is guilty of being a tosser!
Khan only wanted a bit of”Womb service”
He just asked her to “open her curtains “
Or Would you mind polishing my head in the shower ?
I call on da workaz 2 go onn stryk ovar Cris Hewn! I kno dat dont mak no cents but ooh carez?! Stryke!
If people didn’t have cars
they wouldn’t get done for speeding !
They would – for riding their horses too fast. Oh, and we’d be having huge debates about what do with all the horse-droppings. Happened before in London in the late 19th century. Nothing new.
We could dry it out and burn it
to keep our lentils simmering in the winter
Lentils? Ha! You’ll be lucky – we wouldn’t be able to afford to import them. You’ll be on turnip and parsnip broth, and like it….
We can all build houses out of human pooh !
I did
I think the voters will deliver the verdict not you and your thug mates.
Billy, did you bicycle to the anti debt demo yesterday? Thought I saw you there.
Wasn’t in on Saturday?
“Wasn’t in on Saturday?”
That probably why it wasn’t him.
Be like that then.
I was there, but not on a bike.
Shame, I was sure it was you.
I predict that the NHS will still exist in 2015.
But it will stand for National Humane Suicide.
As a subsidiary of Dignitas.
It’ll still be here, slaughtering its patients and sacking any nurses who happen to turn whistle-blower.
400,000 dead because it does though.
Which Northern safe seat are they actually going to offer this trollop?
Sickening isn’t it. They will parachute her in, half the local party will resign in protest and she will still win.
If people are prepared to vote for her then they deserve what they get.
This woman would run Kerry McCarthy close for the honour of being the thickest MP.
Why would anyone want to save the NHS?
1.3 million people want the NHS saved. It pays their wages and pensions. The patients’ opinion? Who cares?
They get paid by it?
Vacuous bint.
The NHS was saved under Tony Blair everyone knows that!
Dragged from a plane
That’ll teach the frogs not to cheer when we kill a terrorist
Deep…
Gougloute-moi le poireau, SVP.
What do you call those who indulge in planking?
Plankers!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-13408156
Lying face down in an usual place ? Sounds like a normal afternoon to me.
Ireland is spending 30,000,000 euro’s on the queens security
good fuckin job we lent em a few quid then !
Why the fuck is she going?
Bunga bunga with me.
Not after the last time, if you don’t mind.
I reckon this is a plot by Tories and labour to wipe the Lib dems off the map and return to the two party system. First Laws, then Vince, The Laws again and now Hunt.
My botty hurts.
That will teach you not to hire a prossie to stick a dildo up yer bum like (name redacted)
Dave goes into yet another conflict in Libya with our armed forces butchered
by cuts
and to pay for it he is looking for yet more armed forces cuts
Wanker !
Stop giving all the money away to the Feckin EU and countries with nuclear weapons and space programmes
you knob !
Mr Strauss-Kahn was obviously displaying classical endogenous growth.
I’m 200th! Fizzy orange time!
Police investigate Chris Huhne speeding points claims
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-13409701
Don’t worry Chris. It will be covered up. I have got Grand Lodge on the job.