“Tory blogging is close to death” Melissa Kite announced back in 2007, “it’s been in intensive care for some time” she proclaimed. However it seems the Sunday Telegraph’s Deputy Political Editor has had a change of heart. She took to her very own Tory-blog today to defend the Prime Minister.

Inevitably it fell upon Melissa, she of Tamzin Lightwater fame, to write the “hooray for Flashman” piece in defence of Dave. The Lobby, and Labour are loving the bully analogy, but it seems Melissa isn’t the George MacDonald Fraser fan it would first seem.

Melissa writes:

“He is, by his own unapologetic description, “a scoundrel, a liar, a cheat, a thief, a coward and a toady.” But, and it’s a big but, Flashman always wins the day. He invariably lands on his feet and, through a combination of luck and cunning, ends up being acclaimed as a hero.”

Which Guido can’t help but notice is remarkably similar to a certain Wikipedia article:

“…by his unapologetic self-description “a scoundrel, a liar, a cheat, a thief, a coward—and oh yes, a toady.” Fraser’s Flashman is an antihero… and yet, through a combination of luck and cunning, usually ends each volume acclaimed as a hero.”

Blogging would be close to death if we were all that lazy Melissa. 

There will be champagne glasses chinking in Downing Street tonight as the news emerges that the Telegraph have sacked Simon Heffer. No friend of Dave, the conservative journalist is apparently off to “pursue a role in journalism and broadcasting that will allow him to complete a major literary project while developing his academic interests.” Will that be at the better-off-out Express or better-off-out UKIP, or both?

Telegraph sources say the “column had got into a rut.” Officially editor Tony Gallagher said “While I am sorry to see him depart, I fully understand his reasons and he leaves with everyone’s best wishes.” And a very large cheque Guido hears.

Ask yourself how the Sunday Times had so much detail in their piece this weekend about Huhne passing off speeding penalty points, an illegal activity. They had the when (2003) and the where (Chelmsford), they also had Vicky Pryce, Huhne’s estranged wife. Why didn’t Vicky go to the police with what she knew about her soon-to-be-ex-husband’s criminal activity?

Speculation around Westminster is that it could be because it was she who took the penalty points. The argument goes that the paper’s lawyers wouldn’t have allowed their hacks to give Huhne the kicking that they did, unless they already had proof. In the meantime the rest of the press-pack has been sent on a wild goose chase looking for former staffers, when the truth might well be right under their noses all along:

“He was forced on the defensive after his estranged wife became the first to comment on Westminster rumours that he had convinced “someone close to him” to accept penalty points for a speeding offence.”

While there are other suspects, “someone close to him”? Hmmm…

Vicky launched her penalty points drop-kick within 24 hours of the AV referendum result. Huhne had a window on Saturday when he could have resigned in disgust and been a hero to the LibDem rank and file, now he’ll probably end up resigning in disgrace. Did Mrs Huhne do just enough to block off any chance of Huhne making a dramatic exit, but resile herself from destroying his career and incriminating herself? Hell hath no fury like a calculating economist…

Jack Straw describes Gordon Brown

“utterly irrational, verging on the mad”

Sky got the exclusive. Laws will also have to give an apology to the House. Wounding. Very very wounding.

UPDATE: Guido would be very interested in seeing the actual report if someone would care to leak it. You can use Hushmail to email guido.fawkes@order-order.com, securely and completely anonymously – not even Guido will know who sent it. Or fax 07092 012 337. Whisper Guido what you know…

Still a joy to watch…

Guido is very happy to be the first to publicly congratulate über-moderniser MP Nic Boles on tying the knot with his partner Shay Meshulam. They had a quiet civil partnership ceremony in Camberwell in March. They’ll be having a livelier wedding party in Ibiza this September. The relationship is due to politics, Nic first met Shay on a Conservative Friends of Israel junket.

Nic tells Guido “Miracles can happen even in middle age”.