May 5th, 2011

AV Funny Business Reported To Electoral Commission

Allow Guido to put his serious face on for a second. The Electoral Commission has received a large number of complaints from Lancashire amidst claims that voters are not automatically being given referendum ballots along with local election papers. The Commission have confirmed the practise is against regulations.

If it turns out this has happened across the country, it could be a real stink tomorrow…


  1. 1
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    you sound suprised? Nothing but dirty tricks on both sides.

  2. 2
    Nick Clegg says:

    My party would like to comment on this, but we’re busy ticking “yes” on a great big stack of ballot forms.

  3. 3
    WVM says:

    Same old fit up!

  4. 4
    NICK CLEGG says:

    I Demand that the Referendum is declared void and a New one Held in the Autumn.

  5. 5
    Details Please says:

    The whole of Lancashire or just one polling station?

  6. 6
    Hackney Borough Council says:

    Anyone need anymore postal votes and pens?

  7. 7
    Brolin says:

    Yeah, I was asked if I would like to vote in both the local elections and the referendum this morning.

    You’d think they’d have ironed this sort of legal thing out. Good spot, Guido.

  8. 8
    Brolin says:

    I live in the East Riding of Yorkshire for any stalkers (and to lend clarity to my tale).

  9. 9
    Geordie Scoot says:

    Bit difficult around here as we are one of the few places with no other election – the People’s Republic of Durham where every vote counts as long as it’s red.

    One dirty trick could be to reverse the wording of the question of the ballot paper to the negative, so the “No” voters would have to vote “Yes” and vice versa. Since I did not have my reading glasses I could not quite make out what I was voting “No” against.

  10. 10
    Osama bin Laden says:

    Like many other Leicester electors living in Abbottabad, I posted my ballot weeks ago.


  11. 11
    TVQuick Nation says:

    It’s only the subversion of democracy. Shhh. Go back to to your grotty little lives, people. Neighbours is on in five minutes, followed by Home & Away, then to C4 for Hollyoaks, then Emmerdale of ITV and then Eastenders on BBC1.

  12. 12
    Mr .... er ..... Singh. Yeah - Mr Singh says:

    Another 150 over here please. My cousins are staying with us, you see.

  13. 13
    john in cheshire says:

    Not just in Lancashire. My mother, who lives in Trafford, Greater Manchester tells me that she was asked if she wanted a ballot paper for the Referendum. I wonder now many people replied that they didn’t, without knowing what they were saying? She, naturally said she did want one and made a very sensible decision on her choice. At 80, I’m pleased she still has so much ‘nous’ as we might say up here.

  14. 14
    Nicholas Clegg esq says:

    I got given a bunch of them today, the woman said to me how many votes do you need Mr Clegg?

  15. 15
    Dick the Prick says:

    Exactly, here we go again, fucking chaos

  16. 16
    QWERTY says:

    I voted no to Nick today

  17. 17
    Glenrothes Labour Assoc Chair says:

    Just another 200 please, my wrist is killing me

  18. 18
    Telling it like it is says:

    Just the ones staffed by muzzies, I should think.

  19. 19
    The Ayes have it says:

    Thanks for the reminder Guido. Now going down to the chapel to vote YES.

  20. 20
    No AV voter says:

    I voted by postal vote in Lancashire, and they DID include both ballot papers. Took my son to the local polling booth today in north Lancashire, and he received both ballot papers. So that’s 2 “No’s” from up here.

  21. 21
    Geordie Scoot says:

    This could be another great British cock-up in the making – far too complicated for folk of average education to understand.

  22. 22
    tat says:

    I should have signed-on today. Fuck. Oh well, for the next two weeks I’m going to be sucking off tramps for £5 a go.

  23. 23
    ampersfa says:

    In Barnet, the Yes box was on top, with the No box underneath, and surely should have been alphabetical. Not sure if this will make a difference, have to wait until after the count.

  24. 24
    Boom boom! says:

    Let alone the polling-station staff.

  25. 25
    Anonymous says:

    Lots of people are changing their mind and voting Yes to AV and sill voting against LD candidates. LD as a party is dead. The 3rd party is UKIP.

  26. 26
    Anonymous says:

    Ditto. “Would you like both ballot papers?” That’s in Cambridge.

  27. 27
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    This was reported by the BBC last week
    in the asian ghetto’s of the north west gangs of asians have yet again been door knocking and collecting postal vote forms and taking them away to be filled in later
    does anybody check for forgeries on these forms ? or match them up with the register of people who have bothered to vote manually

  28. 28

    Just imagine what AV would be like then.

  29. 29
    Mike Hunt says:

    Same here in New Forest East.

  30. 30
    Cynic says:

    but not from ticking ballot forms

  31. 31
    Another Engineer says:

    I was handed both without being asked, but then I’m not in Lancashire, I’m in Yorkshire.

    Fortunate, because I might as well have burnt the local council election ballot paper for all the worth it has.

  32. 32

    Is Zac Goldsmith, that infamous non-user of super injunctions, in here? No? Sorry to disturb, I’ll try the next room.

  33. 33
    I'm such a cunt even my parents abandoned me, Nicky Campbells says:

    It wont be a nationwide event, it only occurs in Bangladeshi/Pakistani colonies

  34. 34
    misterned says:

    I was given both ballot papers, the local election and the referendum.

    Voted no with a big smile on my face.

    It was my very first referendum :)

  35. 35
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Not as bad as standing next to a plonker with an offensive t-shirt, then getting photographed.

  36. 36
    Doktorb says:

    I would not jump to conclusions.

    This is clearly an error of administration, not of instruction.

  37. 37
    Dan A says:

    Yeah I was asked if I intended to vote in both votes, when I said yes the referendum slip was handed to me, rather than it being automatic.

  38. 38
    Anonymous says:

    What if Yes to AV wins with 10% turnout? Will it count?

  39. 39
    misterned says:

    No, that would be racist init!

    We NEED to change the law to prevent mass postal votes across entire communities.

  40. 40
    Dan A says:

    This was in Bristol btw.

  41. 41
    The Emirate of Britainistan says:

    Does anyone check? Yeah, Asians, probably.

  42. 42
    Cynic says:

    Yeah ….after 10 years of Labour Education they cant mark an X

  43. 43
    The Rhondda's famous Chris Byrentboyo says:

    Bugger me! the 10 o’clock show has been axed!!!

    Bugger me, who wouldn’t watch a show both written and presented by smug, unfunny, self regarding lefty cu’nts?

    Buggered if I know

  44. 44
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Already been talked on TV debates about the possibility of a low turn out. It’s guessed that the peers would kick out any reform on low voter turn out as not having enough mandate.

  45. 45
    Bigger Cynic says:

    If only.

  46. 46
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    I’d much rather the referendum votes were being counted tonight rather than the council elections. I hope there’s some exit polls – I’m starting to worry!

  47. 47
    Dr Ayman al-Zawahiri says:

    These bastards in Luton haven’t got me on the electoral roll, the craven apostates

  48. 48
    Hugh Jarse says:

    Odd, don’t you think, that when having any kind of interaction with private or public organisations the first thing you are asked is for some kind of identification, but not when you vote in an election.

    It is true that you are sent a polling card, but you are not obliged to take it to the polling station. The tellers there will believe whatever you say.

    I asked the tellers about this at our polling station last time, and was told “That’s why we have to be here all day from 7am to 10pm with no relief, so that we can remember who has voted and who hasn’t”. He went on to explain that if an identity is used twice or more then the additional votes are still recorded but on a pink ballot paper instead of a white one. These votes are then counted IF the results are close and a few extra votes could swing it.

    This is democracy in action!

  49. 49
    Ivor price says:

    I got both but noticed the local election was only two candidates Labour and Conservative.
    Forms of different colours and boxes so no problems here – but we are rather civilized.

  50. 50
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Voted NO here in Tameside and voted UKIP as there wasn’t a BNP council candidate :-)

    Let’s hope it’s a practise run for an in/out EU referendum.

  51. 51
    Asian wife says:

    We have to give our votes to our husband. It is the will of Allah.

  52. 52
    Ian Junction says:

    Bradford ward: both election and AV votes are going into the same ballot box.

    ‘In Barnet, the Yes box was on top, with the No box underneath,’ so does that mean that it’s not a secret vote in Barnet?

  53. 53
    Cameron - making Brown look competent since May 2010 says:

    Possibly. Our knuckle-headed PM agreed to a referendum with no minimum turnout. Anyone with a brain would have stipulated at least 51%, but Cameron? noooo.

  54. 54
    Anonymous says:

    Has Nick Clegg resigned?

  55. 55
    banana republican says:

    it would be interesting to find out how many of these incidents occur in wards held by conservatives,which are therefore much more likely to return a heavy No vote for the referendum……….

  56. 56
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Voted NO here in Tameside and voted UKIP as there wasn’t a B&P council candidate

    Let’s hope it’s a practise run for an in/out EU referendum.

  57. 57
    Chris Huhne says:

    To Nick Clegg

    Your comment has been posted and is awaiting moderation.

    As indeed are your leadership credentials.

  58. 58
    Nick Clegg casting for votes says:

    Knock Knock

    Who’s There?


    Nick who…?

  59. 59
    Cunderpants Bryan T says:

    Ooooh, how I love a mandate.

  60. 60
    This country is going to the dogs says:

    Postal votes used to be for people at death’s door, or those with no legs. How come it’s changed?

    If people can go shopping, or to the dole office, or their mosque every day/week, then can fecking well walk to a frigging polling station,

  61. 61
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Same here in Tameside. I made sure to read the question, just in case they decided to switch it.

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    Don’t get addicted. You’ll be waiting a very long time for another one.

  63. 63
    Dave H says:

    At a polling station just outside Cambridge we were handed both papers with no comment or question.

  64. 64
    David Camoron (traitor, thief and liar) says:

    Don’t worry – I gave you a cast-iron guarantee of a vote on Lisbon, as did Labour, and Nick promised you a referendum on EU membership. So another referendum will be along, very very shortly.

    That’s a cast-iron promise!

  65. 65
    'ec Salmond says:

    We are already partying and Annabel is poll dancing. Gray has his crispy Brown pants on and is hiding in the closet. Fearty! Gray days are numbered!

  66. 66
    stun says:

    Surprisingly decent turnout here in a smallish village in leafy East Sussex with a steady stream of middle Englanders coming in to vote over the 15 minutes or so that i was watching. I suspect the Noes have it locally as the council elections didn’t even bother including a Labour candidate.

  67. 67
    The Labour Parteh says:

    X is a verboten Christian symbol.

  68. 68
    P. Doff says:

    In some Welsh constituencies I can imagine that after saying “yes” to both papers, the teller would quickly mark a cross in the “Yes” square and stick it in the box for you…. ta very much boyo!

    However in Lutonistan, Abulbradford and Scotchland no-one would be smart enough to work that jape out!

  69. 69
    Anonymous says:

    Luton? Fairy Dairy Land surely?

  70. 70
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Just voted: NO

    According to the returning officer I was the one hundred and forty fith to vote.

    Not a big turnout she says.

  71. 71
    rotten cripple says:

    interesting, heading off to my polling station as soon as my gf arrives home. Hoping there’s a labour twat there to harangue. Ah, Sussex by the sea (almost!)

  72. 72
    QWERTY says:

    I voted no to Nick Clegg today.

  73. 73
    The Paragnostic says:

    Tameside – you poor bastard.

    Is Hyde Town Hall still festooned in Urdu directions for the twats who haven’t learned English?

    I deliberately moved to Glossop years ago so as not to pay my council tax to Tameside and see it wasted on subcontinentals…

  74. 74

    Same at my little place in Lincs. No probelms

  75. 75
    Concrete Pump says:

    DNA of Bin Laden has come back with a reading of 24% cocoa, 57% coconut, 18% sugar, and 6% milk. Experts say this is probably due to the bounty on his head

  76. 76

    or even ‘problems’

  77. 77
    The Paragnostic says:

    How come it’s changed?

    Best ask that nice Mr Blair – he said he wanted to increase voter turnout, but we all know the real reason…

  78. 78
    Michael says:

    In Rochdale, we were asked if we wanted both ballots!

  79. 79
    Engineer says:

    Ditto in West Cheshire.

  80. 80
    genghiz the kahn says:

    The Head of the Electoral Commission should have been sacked after the foul ups last May. The woman couldn’t organise a piss up in a brewery. Sack her Dave.

    What is that body for, turning the UK’s elections into something akin to a third world one party state.

  81. 81
    Phantom says:

    Here in leafy Buckinghamshire, the retired Colonels and redoubtable ladies from the WI who act as tellers don’t muck about.

    Both ballot papers at the time, both explained to us.

    Very clear instruction including the quaint “show the back of the ballot paper to the tellers”.

    No mess, no fuss, job done.

    Apart from the spotty feck who asked me who I voted for outside sporting a red rosette.

    I told him to “Go p*ss up a rope, f*ckstick.”

    I think he understood my voting intention.

  82. 82
    Isaac Hunt says:

    I think he means the box on the paper that you put your cross in, not the ballot box.

  83. 83
    The Paragnostic says:

    Even the token bint wasn’t funny – not even by the already dismal standards set by the woeful Jimmy Carr and the eminently punchable David Mitchell.

    Charlie Brooker made me titter occasionally, though.

  84. 84
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Yes the muzzies are spreading in Hyde. They have practically surrounded the local ASDA, with a mosque right next door.

    I’m in Denton though, no mosque here, YET.

  85. 85
    Secret Ballots are a legal requirement ain't they ? says:

    ???? Just one ballot box at my polling station…surely to differentiate by having ballot boxes marked “YES” and “NO” is a criminal offence i.e. secret ballot(Ballot Act 1872 and amendments incorporating secret ballot in subsequent legislation) you may as just ask people verbally as they come in if this is going on…needs to be investigated/reported if true

  86. 86
    MrAngry61 says:

    Here’s hoping that UKIP replace Lib Dems. If that were to happen then AV wouldn’t be so bad.

  87. 87
    Anonymous says:

    When I voted they asked if I wanted to vote in both the council and AV vote, i.e. a good way of talking the numbers down. I live in Epsom, Woodcote ward.

    My wife (bless) got confused and declined the AV vote. It struck me as very odd, as when I’ve previously had to vote on 2 issues, I was never asked. I voted No, of course.

  88. 88
    Isaac Hunt says:

    Ditto in Newcastle.

  89. 89
    MrAngry61 says:

    Maybe he was precluded from doing so under the terms of the back room dealcoalition agreement.

  90. 90
    Dr. No says:

    This sounds rather sinister. Are the polling station staff in these situations stooges of Common Purpose who then later fill in unused forms as they wish after the voter has gone? The suborning of democracy in the UK increases with every passing election.

  91. 91
    Isaac Hunt says:

    Nigel Griffiths MP

  92. 92
    Isaac Hunt says:

    I meant to say Nigel Griffiths MP is here. Will he do?

  93. 93
    Anonymous says:

    They might have few wifes and many girl friends, so …

  94. 94
    Barclay James Harvest says:

    The ballot box in my London polling booth was (supiciously) new; not like the tin boxes painted with black paint that they had for the General Election.

    PS : “Yes” it is – get to your local booth by 10 o’clock and vote for the yea-sayers.

  95. 95
    Fake Blood says:

    Same in Charnwood, m’boy.

  96. 96
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    Clearly, us yokels in rural Cambridgeshire haven’t got the intellectual capacity of those smart city slickers in Cambridge itself. I got handed 3 forms – AV, District Council, and Parish Council (which I didn’t know was up for grabs), and was required to put all three in the same box.

    The AV and District Council forms were easiest. “No” and “Conservative”. The Parish Council was a real eye-opener. About 20-something names, none of whom I had ever met, and the instruction printed “you may vote for no more than 17 candidates”. FFS! UKIP were running about 10 candidates on the list, with party logo printed alongside their names. No-one else on the list had a party name or logo, so I crossed one UKIP name and one unknown name at random.

  97. 97
    MrAngry61 says:

    Carter Fuck are probably lurking…

  98. 98
    Engineer says:

    He also had ‘Best before 2nd May 2011′ tattood on his body.

  99. 99
    David says:

    I vote in the East Riding of Yorkshire (Beverely) and voters were being given the ballot paper for the local elections and then asked if they wanted a ballot paper for the referendum.

  100. 100
    Handycock says:

    And I am unanimous with Nick Clegg.

  101. 101
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    You need to be in the Sixth Form nowadays to learn your alphabet as far as X.

  102. 102
    ST says:

    Humpf. Not a surprise, the polling station staff are often all over the place.

    For example on twitter someone called JamesEllison92 is working in a polling station and decided to twat the following:-

    James Ellison
    Polling station job nearly finished! Don’t know if i’m allowed to say Vote #YesToAV :P #election #referendum
    5 minutes ago via Mobile Web

    Hmmm what do you think James, your working in an official capacity and, despite your best efforts to be clever using #YestToAV rather than actually writing it, you have decided to make a political point. – what a wanker.

  103. 103
    Northern Monkee says:

    Think yourselves lucky – we have ONE candidate, some bint for Liebour, and so there wasn’t even a ballot paper that I could spoil in disgust!!

    Democracy my Ar$e!!

  104. 104
    PD77 says:

    Just went to my local Polling Station and was asked if I wanted to have the AV Referendum paper? So is that right or should they as stated hand it to you without having to ask if you want it?

  105. 105
    Officer Crabtree says:

    Ballots for bigots.

  106. 106
    ST says:

    Same in Middlesbrough.

  107. 107
    Publius says:

    Same here in Cambridgeshire. I was not automatically given both papers, but was asked “Do you want both?”

  108. 108
    A Nonny Mouse says:

    He looks a bit young and thick on his profile

  109. 109
    A Tramp says:

    You’ll have to pay me more than that!

  110. 110
    QWERTY says:

    I had FOUR sodding voting papers today, I voted no to Nick Clegg

  111. 111
    @JamesEllison92 says:

    Polling station job nearly finished! Don’t know if i’m allowed to say Vote #YesToAV :P #election #referendum

  112. 112
    BM says:

    In Bedford we were given three ballot papers…referendum, mayor’s election (selected by AV) and council elections (where we could choose two candidates).

    Plenty of scope for confusion

    Seemed to be plenty of people voting and more posters than in the general election

  113. 113
    screw the lot of them says:

    A real stink?

    What the fuck about this then?

    “The peacekeeping mission in Cyprus is one of the longest running United Nations missions. It was established in 1964 to prevent further fighting between the Greek Cypriot and Turkish Cypriot communities on the island.

    British troops patrol the buffer zone or “green line” separating the north and south of the island.”

    After 46+ years we are still paying for this shit?


  114. 114
    South of the M4 says:

    Vale of Glamorgan. Offered all three ballot papers at the same time.

  115. 115
    ST says:

    Brilliant it, like Mock the Week, is populated by loud, obnoxious types who are desperate for the applause of the painfully right on audience. 10 o’clock show was all the more painful as the presenters affected to know what they were talking about.

  116. 116
    screw the lot of them says:

    Why the fuck was my post censored?

  117. 117
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Twat. If he was born in ’92, then he’s 10 years younger than me. I’m a complete fuck-wit, so Christ only knows what a nob-end he is. Particularly if he’s a) tweeting whilst undertaking an official role; and b) supporting the YES campaign. He certainly shouldn’t be allowed any such role in the future.

  118. 118
    South of the M4 says:

    Oh, and for a small village, the polling station was the busiest I’ve seen it.

  119. 119
    South of the M4 says:

    Given who he was, I strongly suspect he put you down as a ‘don’t know’.

  120. 120
    Deploy the Duffy says:

    Your jaaawwwwking

  121. 121

    Put you down as a ‘maybe’ then?

  122. 122
    Meanwhile says:

    DNA of Bin Laden has come back with a reading of 24% cocoa,
    57% coconut, 18% sugar, and 6% milk.
    Experts say this is probably due to the bounty on his head.

  123. 123
    AV says:

    Imagining would be my first choice. Conjuring-up a picture second. Fantasying third. Visualising fourth.

  124. 124

    On turnout, I’ve been out and about all day at the Polling Stations.
    Very quiet early on. The 8am rush didn’t happen.
    Quiet until mid day everywhere.
    But a decent amount of people at all the stations since about 5pm.
    Might be quite decent.

  125. 125
    Yes to Win. says:

    Hmmm Polling station was quite busy and only open for the referendum. As the papers and the BBC are telling everyone that the No’s have it were these people mainly Yes voters like me who were making the effort?

  126. 126
    ST says:

    LOL quite right I was born in 1981 and I still struggle to keep the flat clean and the ironing done. I was asked to stand as a candidate, no way , I’ve a head full of ideas but no experience.

    Youth (relative) is an over-rated commodity.

  127. 127
    Bollock Omaha says:

    Vote NO for more of the same.

  128. 128
    Nemo says:

    In my ward there was a con, a liebore & a ukipper, lib dems no where to be seen, I voted for the Ukipper simply because he was local to the ward, the liebore man was also local. No one was standing line like new emerging democracies but was slightly more active than the last time. Just short of 21/2 hours to closing go and make your pitch Yes or No to AV in a one state area like mine (liebore) vote yes to av to concentrate minds in marginal areas vote either way but get off your bums and vote, if you don’t vote do not complain when things are done with which you disapprove.

  129. 129
    Snotrocket says:

    @Dick….I have voted at all elections since ’64 so I figured I pretty well understood the process. But when I got to the polling station today I realised how much subliminal advertising had been working on me with the YES/NO campaign. So much so, that I predict an awful lot of spoiled papers today. Why?

    Because, when I got to the booth I realised the candidates were already numbered (as always – but I’d not taken in the significance before) 1 to ‘n’. I was very nearly tempted, sub-consciously, to number my choice rather than use an X. I bet many people will fail to use the ‘X’.

  130. 130
    Coconut Top says:

    Bounty the taste of paradise. Or at least it was until the Mullahs persuaded their flock that suicide bombing was the taste of paradise.

  131. 131
    stun says:

    Not sure – the Mail etc did a good job of encouraging the No vote out. Interesting from the comments above that turnout has been pretty reasonable in the rural constituencies, but a bit naff in the cities. The missus works in the local shop and everyone who came in was going to vote. The shop sells more Mails and Telegraphs than the rest of the papers put together. And one Morning Star (!).

  132. 132
    nell says:

    They were obviously short of candidates. You should have offered to stand as well. Then people would have had a choice.

    Civic duty and all that?

  133. 133
    LabourNutter says:

    This happened in Cambridge too – “do you want to vote in the AV referendum?”

    “Uh… Yeah!”

  134. 134
    nell says:

    We voted early morning. We were handed both ballot papers without having to ask. And once completed we were asked to post both ballot papers into the same ballot box.

    I thought the turnout looked very quiet.

  135. 135
    nell says:

    Vote Yes for squabbling coalitions ad infinitum.

  136. 136
    Charlie K says:

    I need a postal form as I’m often legless.

  137. 137
    vote no to av,vote no to sandal wearers says:

    He wanted to increase sponger turnout the hoon

  138. 138
    Nemo says:

    Yes Paras, B’Liar has an awful lot to answer for, and liebore MP’s backed him up when even they thought,”ey op summat wrong ere, I smell a rat” but liked the trappings of being the party in power so nothing was done.

  139. 139
    Nemo says:

    AE, another one in a one party state.

  140. 140
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    Report him to the returning officer, and if it looks like that polling station is likely to return an overall “Yes” vote (ie in a Lib Dem ward), make the helpful suggestion that all ballots from that polling station are annulled on the grounds of staff bias.

    Can’t hurt.

  141. 141
    Bobby Mugabe says:

    The UK is a fucking banana republic who don’t know how to conduct elections anymore.

  142. 142
    Southern Softy says:

    I cast my NO vote this morning.
    We have no other elections here, only the referendum,
    so it was no surprise to have to wake the staff up so I could vote.

  143. 143
    I bet most 18-30 yr olds where doing the same says:

    I was too busy claiming my dole today to trek all the way up to the polling station.

  144. 144
    Anonymous says:

    “And once completed we were asked to post both ballot papers into the same ballot box.”

    WTF? Well it is Norfolk I suppose, so what would you expect?

  145. 145
    Opinion Pole says:

    We’ve had squabbling coalitions of EU cocksuckers for the last 40 odd years so what’ll be the difference?

  146. 146
    I bet most 18-30 yr olds where doing the same says:

    The B&P had their votes nicked and ”misplaced” once again second local election year running in our ward where they where due for a shoo in also.

  147. 147
    McBroon says:

    SSSSUUUUUUUEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! *grabs Nokia*

  148. 148
    Anonymous says:

    Just voted NO, second preference being YES.

  149. 149
    QWERTY says:

    i thought Muslims liked a bit of fudge?

  150. 150
    Cameron - making Brown look competent since May 2010 says:

    Then the fecking Hoon should have walked away and let an LabLib coalition sink under Brown’s debt.

  151. 151
    Geordie Scoot says:

    My wife has just come back from voting complaining that the polling station was configured the opposite way to usual which she found confusing. The booths were on the left rather than on the right. Funny creatures, women.

  152. 152
    Opinion Pole says:

    Got a few dirty looks upon dropping my strides, wiping my arse with the ballot paper, and failing to fold it in half neatly.
    Roll on next year’s council elections.

  153. 153
    QWERTY says:

    She’s a typical Liebore leftie dyke who got the easiest ride off of Paxman last year. I guess stopping the Tories getting an outright majority meant the BBC liked her.

  154. 154
    Uncle Arthur says:

    outside our voting station there was a very big man with a mallet and pen and paper taking an exit poll…my wife told him to F off and he put us down as ‘not sure’

  155. 155
    Uncle Arthur says:

    how were the blubells ?

  156. 156
    lol says:

    lets hope the unknown name was not

    mr herr hitler

  157. 157
    The Paragnostic says:

    Mock the Week was only worth watching for Frankie Boyle – he’d rather offend than preach the gospel of Marx.

    The rest of them are distressingly earnest and boring.

  158. 158
    stun says:

    Because it was bollocks?

  159. 159
    vote no to av,vote no to sandal wearers says:

    I got it correct,practised all morning with the kitchen devil on a labour poster

  160. 160
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Agreed 100%

  161. 161
    Bullets not ballots says:

    So the whole of Britain within 20 years?

  162. 162
    Morley and Outwood Agent says:

    A couple of thousand more should do it

  163. 163
    Dr Splob says:

    Fucking hell.

    And there was me, marching to the polling station, with the single-minded intention of putting my cross only in the TOP box!


  164. 164
    British university undergraduate says:

    What’s an alphabet?

  165. 165
    Fa kin Su Pah says:

    As a reasonable bully in my youth
    I want to restart my career and run
    across David Mitchell in the lunch hour.

  166. 166
    lol says:

    we have AV+ here in scotland….

    Conservatives get 20% of the vote and 16 seats out of 90

    In the Generaal Election Conservatives got 25% of vote (in scotland) and just 1 seat out of 73

    You pays your money and takes your choice……

    Country now split into South (tory) and Norf (Labour) and never the twain shall meet – we face years of minority governments or weak coalitions with FPTP

    FPTP such a wonderful system, no country in last 20 years picked it for thier election systems……

  167. 167
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Snork! Ha!

  168. 168
    nell says:

    Seems to be common practice across the country not just norfolk.

  169. 169
    Southern Softy says:

    Agreed, ST and just to go further,
    youth and education are wasted on the young,
    and retirement and money are wasted on the old.

  170. 170
    mememe says:

    When FPTP needs just 30% of the votes to gain a majority – voter fraud is a way to take over a country without a war or invasion.

    AV makes it hard to rig local elections….. FPTP only needs 1000 votes to alter the result.

    When an MP spends 25,000 and gets 35000 votes – you have to wonder – if that MP is ex-treasury minister … wow

  171. 171
    aggregation says:

    Hi All of You Out There in Cyberspace.
    If you have the time then do please post here the name of your local authority and whether or not you were handed the referendum ballot automatically or not. Clearly someone has been at work, and it would help us all immensely to know just who.

  172. 172
    Southern Softy says:

    And later on, Posing Paddy Pantsdown will be giving us the benfit of his wisdom on Question Time. Shouldn’t take long.

  173. 173
    nell says:

    You want to ‘rob’ the kinnochios of their vast EU acquired wealth?, or the laughable baronessashton of her bumbling, overpaid role as euforeignsec?

  174. 174

    In Woking I was asked if I wanted to vote in both elections.

    It occurred to me that it seemed odd, and that if this question was asked in some wards and not others it could skewer the result.

    I posted about it on Twitter.

  175. 175
    gladstone spinning in his grave says:

    in scotland we have AV+ and happy with it – so we not the fools here.

    Its the english who think thier electroate too dumb to have more power in thier voting choice.

    First the english elite though only landowners should have the vote, then that women should not have it – now its that peasants should have limited power..

    and seems peasants may agree with that view.

    Education Education Education ???????

    We dont know where the money went, but not educating the masses is they struggle to put an X in the correct box

  176. 176
    Maximus says:

    Surprised you weren’t asked if you wanted something for the weekend.

  177. 177
    Call Me Dave says:

    I understand your concerns, and I will take decisive action – by sacking British troops and increasing our overseas aid contributions.

    Sorry, you mentioned something about Electoral Commission? Well, I’m too busy.

    Pip pip.

  178. 178

    I should add I spent the rest of the day – on your recommendation Guido – in or near Peppa Pig world. I’m now sacred for life by that jingle…

  179. 179
    Anonymous says:

    ST says “Youth (relative) is an over-rated commodity”
    It’s wasted on the young.

  180. 180
    Geordie Scoot says:

    Norfolk and good!

  181. 181
    The People's Bananarepublic of Britainistan says:

    For once in your miserable fucking life, you’re right.

  182. 182
    13eastie says:

    You mean Laurie Penny?

    And her off-camera helium-huffing?

    She was fucking hilarious!

  183. 183
    Mr Logical says:

    Yes, so find out where they live and stab them.

  184. 184
    shepshedRichtea says:

    Here in shepshed we were given individual voting slips (3) colour coded to put in the same colour coded voting box – you all must be fibbing

  185. 185
    Opinion Pole says:

    I’ll rely on the new government to change all that then, shall I?

  186. 186
    Anonymous says:

    Most of the countries created in the last 20 years are dictatorships & thus are not averse to arranging the election result whatever system is used.

  187. 187
    David Camoron (traitor, thief and liar) says:

    I think I should increase foreign aid to Turkey.

    What shall I scrap to pay for this?? hmm.. Your local hospital?

  188. 188
    tatwatch says:

    Yeah, you said, Tat. Fuck off.

  189. 189
    Tachybaptus says:

    All life is sacred, and every shed a temple.

  190. 190
    tell it like it really is says:

    So…………… they feel it, they’re wanting to reintroduce controls, that is if they can’t continue to shovel them all onwards to Blighty………………

  191. 191
    Stop fucking whining says:

    Forget about AV, OK? It’s over, gone.

    Maybe in another 40 years.

  192. 192
    Fuck Political Correctness says:

    He’d be 122 if he was still alive.

    And he’d be a damn better choice than anything we’ve got today.

  193. 193
    gladstone spinning in his grave says:

    wales picked AV+

    scotland picked AV+

    newly declared independants ….. did not pick FPTP….


    your point ?

  194. 194
    English folk says:

    No you are not. and No is the preferred way to vote.

  195. 195
    Totally unbelievable says:

    Surely it’s not down to polling clerks to ask voters whether they wish an AV referendum ballot paper ? At the GE last May there were also local elections in my area,,nobody asked if I wanted to vote in the General Election AND the local election they just handed me both ballot papers and that is what should happen to-day,,,otherwise the polling clerk could be accused of deciding who votes in each respective election by either automatically giving some people both ballot papers and others merely asking IF they want to vote in both elections,,,

  196. 196
    Lobster Throttler says:

    I wrote “screw you all, EU referendum now” on both papers, fucking lying bastards.

  197. 197
    libdem deep thinkers says:

    why does he (clegg) need to ?

    If he wins AV vote – he gains a change in voting and will be forgiven the student change of heart

    If he loses – he can crucify the tories in cabinet for next 4 years demanding what he wants in return – how will they stop him reducing any cuts or policies he dislikes…. ?

    How does he loose ? If libdems decimated in council election – he has more bargaining power in cabinet – as he can always walk away from the coalition and say tories went back on thier word and want cuts too fast and too deep – something that will resonate with voters, or that country not recovering etc etc etc

    Tories need libdems or they go for minority government option – an option cameron recognised was useless

    Last tory government was destroyed by the drip drip of a small majority which was eaten away by MP deaths and bi-elections

    Cameron needs 5 years to turn around the economy – Clegg does not need to give him 5 years if its too costly to his party

    Clegg playing the long game

    If looses AV then next election their manifesto will offer PR…..

  198. 198

    For the purposes of service, I am currently in Bosnia. They can do their worst…

  199. 199
    ???? says:

    Let’s hope so but somehow I doubt it

  200. 200
    tell it like it really is says:

    I understand Unison was telling the postal office workers to dump the parcels of BNP leaflets, which they are legally obliged to deliver. Packages were found dumped over hedges in Wales, obviously they feel very threatened by the BNP.

  201. 201
    Opinion Pole says:

    If voting yes or no to AV really changed anything, do you think you’d be given the choice?

  202. 202
    Fuck Political Correctness says:

    I didn’t vote. If the c’unts want my support, they’d better make an effort to get it.

  203. 203
    nell says:

    Anybody hear of bullyballs anywhere lately?

    edmilitwit has been out and about canvassing for the yestoavvote, gordon and sarah have been canvassing for labour in scotland, one or two labour ministers have been busy around the local government areas canvassing for labour councillors.

    bullyballs has been conspicuous by his total absence. Is that because he expects labour to lose on all fronts so does not want to be associated with their failure?

  204. 204
    HenryHiggins says:

    Here is why Labour will lose the next election :

  205. 205
    Fuck Political Correctness says:

    You are the Archbishop of Canterbury, and I want to smash your fecking lefty head in with a rock.

  206. 206
    nell says:

    Which new government would that be? This one or the next one?

  207. 207
    aggregation says:

    Just for the record, GtK aka total moronic DICKHEAD :
    The Electoral Commission appears to have no jurisdiction whatever over Returning Officers or their Counterparts in any Election; All it is permitted to do is to offer advice, and thereafter to report on their performance; Both of which it did superbly in 2010. Where their advice had been followed, there were few problems. Where the advice had been ignored, well – we read about it the following day.
    Now: The Referendum is different. The EC may prove to have serious legal clout here. So; Please expect serious repercussions for those Local Authorities that deliberately foul up..

  208. 208
    ichabod says:

    Mitchell received alot of good notices for his performances ( as opposed to Carr and that Geordie woman who were both panned routinely) , but he was the worst interviewer I have ever seen ( save only, possibly, the retard Fearne Cotton). Not funny, over ready to suck up to the teenage audience, unknowledgeable….a bit of a dick really.

  209. 209
    ST says:

    Really? You think Russell Howards “funny” – oh wait they’re all the same high pitched nasal thing – voices are serious. Or what about that small bald bloke who speaks like he’s in the middle of a particularly hard shit.

    As for Frankie Boyle, he stopped being funny when he ran out of taboos.

  210. 210
    Pensioners always vote says:

    At 9am this morning in my ward where there are no local elections only referendum the pensioner vote was queing out the door and queing at the 2 polling cubicles 3 deep and queing to put the ballot paper in the ballot box

  211. 211
    Oh Joy....... says:

    Least we can all still have gay sex with Dave Walsh for 50 quid a go.

  212. 212
    Oh Joy....... says:



  213. 213
    ichabod says:

    Wait yer town, matey.

  214. 214
    WVM says:

    Very true, a friend of mine today did the ranking numbers instead of the X’s mark in the boxes on the councillors voting form.

    He said he asked what to do after a very poor explanation of what to do and the answer he got was “you can vote for any of them in any order”.

  215. 215
    ichabod says:

    Whoops, meant wait yer turn….

  216. 216
    Hillary Clinton says:

    Obama hasn’t got a clue. If I were in charge I would definitely release that picture with the gaping head-wound.

    It’s a no-brainer.

  217. 217
    Tony says:

    Yes, I was handed a ballot paper, all appeared to be in order (Taunton)

  218. 218
    aggregation says:

    Hi All of You Out There in Cyberspace.
    If you have the time then do please post here the name of your local authority and whether or not you were handed the referendum ballot automatically or not. Clearly someone has been at work, and it would help us all immensely to know just who.

  219. 219
    Calm down dear (is that ok Harriet?) says:

    The boxed area on the paper you muppet.

  220. 220
    Opinion Pole says:

    And that’s how they live life high on the hog.
    The lower the turnout, the more their braindead drone’s votes count.

  221. 221
    aggregation says:

    Sorry, too many nots. But you I’m sure you get the message.

  222. 222
    ST says:

    And who are you?

  223. 223
    joolz says:

    just google Hollie Greig and you will see what has been covered up here up in scotland.

    Robert Green has been trying to get someone to take the gauntlet and get these people and the people protecting them but has been arrested, threatened etc


  224. 224
    bald old git says:

    medway towns – was given both papers without asking.

  225. 225
    Bradford City Council says:

    Fuck the pens Hackney were using pencils today, well you can’t be too careful with the B&P vote up here, send us a few more thousand that should bag it!

  226. 226
    Dr Ayman al-Zawahiri says:

    Oh my fucking Christ, those lefty filth actually had the utterly ludicrous Pennie on?

  227. 227
    To set the record straight says:

  228. 228
    Dr Ayman al-Zawahiri says:

    It is the will of Allah

  229. 229
    Returning Officer says:

    This year our target is to get 50% of all B&P votes counted as spoiled, we’re not too fussy, a speck of dust will do!

  230. 230
    Bill Posters says:

    Every newsagent probably sells more Mails,Suns & Telegraphs…probably 10 times the number of Guardians & Independents

  231. 231
    Overfull bin says:

    Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams says the US killing of unarmed al-Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden has left “a very uncomfortable feeling”

    And I can’t swim either

  232. 232
    Anon East Cambs says:

    East Cambs: both voting papers handed over automatically. No problem.

  233. 233
    A poofter says:

    David Webb is the real c’unt

    A lefty c’unt Labour supporting fucktard, accepting monies from Barclays PLC


  234. 234
    nell says:

    Sowhy have zacandjemima got injunctions to stop the publication of their emails?

    What Have they been up to that they want to conceal?

    Of course jemima’s latest piece of vitriol came when she was denied an invite to the royalwedding. In retaliation for what she saw as a snub, she spent the whole day posting vicious, childish comments about kate and her dress.

    And these people claim to be charity workers!

  235. 235
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    how it works in asian communities is as most of them can’t understand English or write it
    the local asian candidate and his heavies will apply for postal ballot papers on their behalf
    once the papers have been delivered they return and collect the papers sometimes making threats and take them away and fill them in before posting
    that is why the turnout is so much higher in these areas and why more and more asians are becoming councilors and MP’s

  236. 236
    Joanna fucking lumley says:

    Please dont forget the Ghurkas, the magical Ghurkas, and their 15 family members

  237. 237
    OBAMA says:

    Exterminate. All those who disobey the USA will be exterminated.

    Exteminate, Exterminate, Exterminate.

  238. 238
    That's News says:

    I think the Electoral Commission could be busy. Perhaps they’ll be so busy they’ll need to take some extra staff on? Electoral Reform Services might have someone they could send round…

  239. 239
    Anonymous says:

    and green party any whore (male) to be seen?

  240. 240
    Chris Huhne says:

    I said no to Nick Clegg today

  241. 241
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    if you say no they will keep them and fill them in afterwards
    you have to remember all the staff at poling stations are local authority workers
    they will do everything to try and break the coalition and return labour to power

    what ever happened to police officers at poling stations ?

  242. 242
    ichabod says:

    No, but a bit longer than it will take that Yasmin Ali Ba Ba Brown . Why do the BBC inflict this epically ghastly woman on us–she’s not even a good journalist.

  243. 243
    Fa kin Su Pah says:

    I may have misinterpreted but
    some comment earlier seemed to suggest
    he may be preoccupied with certain ‘legal’

  244. 244
    HenryHiggins says:

    It’s true that the Obama has shown monumental incompetence. But many of us have been saying for years that he was completely out of his depth when it came to the Presidency.

    Obama is a nice voice, with an empty head, whereas Bush was a dreadful voice with an empty head.

    Obama cannot come out with courage and conviction and say that ‘Osama bin Laden deserved to die, however it came about, bin Laden was wanted: dead or alive. Anybody that side with bin Laden is an enemy of America, and will be treated as an enemy.’

    Obama is no Reagan, and he will lose next year.

    Obama displays weakness, incompetence, and downright negligence. America needs a new President. Obama is not fit to govern.

    He fails to explain the success of the mission properly. He fails to explain that Islam is at war with west (anything else is a downright lie). He fails to conduct the war properly. He dithers and obfuscates.

    If Obama had been President earlier and carried out his policy of shutting down Guantanamo, bin Laden would never have been caught. Yet Obama claims exclusive credit. This is the irony. Obama is a fool out of his depth, surrounded by the anti-American traitors that now fill the US Democratic Party.

    That Pakistan and China have got away with it for so long is astonishing. Everyone in the intelligence knows that their intelligence services have been in league for 20 years, and that the whole Taliban-al Qaeda thing is just a Pakistani front, with massive funding from Saudi Arabia, and massive logistical support, training and arms from China.

    China is meanwhile carrying out a vast multi-million pound Maoist terrorist insurgency across the south of Asia.

    America today is the coward that refuses to take on its enemies because it is badly led – lions are led by donkeys.

  245. 245
    Larry Sanders says:

    And in the news tonight, Nick Clegg said no to AV meant he’d still be be everybody’s second preference.
    Stay tuned for that vital referendum result.
    No flipping!

  246. 246
    Anonymous says:

    Labour think they own all of the polling stations

  247. 247
    stun says:

    Yup, the Progressive ones just fly off the shelves. Hoons.

  248. 248
    nell says:

    Good Grief he hasn’t got a superinjun ction going as well has he?

    What has he been up to?!!

  249. 249
    AV for gays and lefties says:

    Provincial oafs, what do you expect. They still think white bread is a great new invention.

  250. 250
    Corruption says:


    Also used in conjunction with the Commonwealth voting (very bizarre that non-GB citizens can vote in general elections). Lots of people registered to vote because they are “resident” when in fact they have never left Karachi and have no idea they are voting at all.

    Simple. Investigation into the obvious vote-rigging that has been goin on and clearly returned some Labour MPs who wouldn’t otherwise be there., not only embarass the Labour MPs who benefitted from it, but will give an excuse to get-rid of postal voting for all except those with a doctors note, and can also be used as an excuse for the Conservatives to call an election on the basis that they got robbed last year.

    Labour’s national share would fall at least 5% with no postal votes, due to the reluctance of many Labour-minded voters, in their heartlands, to actually get down a polling station.

  251. 251
    stun says:

    Rother, East Sussex. Three papers without asking.

  252. 252
    Rt Honourable Gordon "courage" Brown says:

    So do I

  253. 253
    hmmmmm says:

    Well I never….

  254. 254
    fuck who a gives says:

    Archbishop who?

  255. 255
    Zac says:

    Jemima likes it up the chuffer.
    Let’s keep this all in the family.

  256. 256
    stun says:

    Think that was an incorrect guess – the injunction (Jemima and Zac) is now the subject of an open Twitter spat between Guido and Puddleduck (see top right corner of the page). Pretty easy to find the injunction which is publically available (though the content of the ‘hacked’ emails isn’t, of course).

    Leaves open the question of which MP is involved in the new one – Jemima claims it’s nothing to do with her family (i.e. Zac).

  257. 257
    Slim says:

    Head boy for Africans.
    One of Prince Gormless’s pals.

  258. 258
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    As most of our doctors are of the same persuasion you would then see a massive rise in the number of doctors notes issued !

  259. 259
    The last quango in paris says:

    Surely clegg cAn say he didn’t go back on his word as he would have done all he said he would do if he was pm!

  260. 260
    jgm2 says:

    That’s a good sign for the T*ries. Folk with jobs voting after a day at work.

    Won’t be many Labour voters amongst that lot.

  261. 261
    Fa kin Su Pah says:

    Probably nothing, but he does
    reek of personal vanity and as you say
    has been uncharacteristically quiet.
    His only success has been to develop the
    ‘mutter under breath’ to a fine art. Notably at PMQs.
    Apart from that, lefties must be rather disappointed
    with him.

  262. 262
    Elgin's lost his marbles says:

    In midlands, got both papers, local and ref, and both went into same box. Papers different colours and sizes for easy separation (or appearance thereof).

  263. 263
    Returning Officer says:

    Hahahahahaha, fuck you all we’ve done it again!

  264. 264
    jgm2 says:

    Yep. That’s the way to do it. Just number them ‘1’ or ‘2’.

  265. 265
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    But if he was, he wouldn’t be allowed to tell you, would he?

  266. 266
    Joanna fucking lumley says:

    Excellent retort sir

    Better still a fucking uge great obnail boot up the little shit stabber’s fundament might have conveyed your feelings in a most direct manner

  267. 267
    jgm2 says:

    I’m surprised she had a problem. Most Supermarkets have the entrance on the right of the building (space permitting). There’lll be areason for that. The fuckers are experts with messing with your head so you buy more shit than you need and toss half of it in the bin.

    It sounds like they set it up to mirror her normal entering-a-big-building experience.

  268. 268
    Slim says:

    Behind the scenes, those in the know play out their little games while the rest of us pay for the privilege for scraps thrown to the masses.
    Ever get the feeling you’re being taken for a c’unt?

  269. 269
    Infuriated of West Mids says:

    Who’d have thunk it? It’s getting to the stage we need UN inspectors to monitor our elections.

  270. 270
    Slim says:

    And now, the great and the good pick over the bones while the mong public stare in wide eyed appreciation of how much it’s going to cost them.

  271. 271
    jgm2 says:

    Useless, perennially wrong fuckwit will be canvassing his own constituency trying to hold on to his seat next time around.

  272. 272
    Dave Walsh's sore arse says:

    *whimpers* Yes.

  273. 273
    Weygand says:

    Also in East Riding, I was asked if I wanted all 3 voting papers.

    Sounded great until I found they did not have a Lucky Dip and could not explain what would happen if there was a roll over.

  274. 274
    Slim says:

    Be a shit stabber.
    Start with your local MP.

  275. 275
    Dave Walsh's sore arse says:

    And I’m sure he can fight his own battles. And an injunction’s perfectly OK for an MP when embarrassing details come to public light is it?


  276. 276
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    and to monitor Mp’s expenses !

  277. 277
    jgm2 says:

    Simple. Investigation into the obvious vote-rigging that has been goin on and clearly returned some Labour MPs

    If by ‘some’ you meant ‘many’ then I have to agree. Private Eye is all over some c*unt in London who awards himself and his mates 150K a year as councillors while his constituents live in squalor. It’s like Mogadishu, Lahore and Harare all rolled into one.

  278. 278
    Of pigs and men says:

    Is that the socialist republic of Sir Robin Wales’s Newham or the C*nservative fiefdom of Bexley?

  279. 279
    Ancient proverb says:

    Money talks

  280. 280
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    Your faith in politicons is misplaced.

  281. 281
    Question Time Tonight says:

    David Dimbletwat is joined in London by the usual lefty rent’a’mob and…

    Philip Hammond – Con
    Andy Burnham – Lab
    Paddy Ashdown – Lib
    Yasmin Alibhai-Brown – Bitch
    Douglas Murray – Who’s a nice boy!

  282. 282
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’ve always been a c’unt.

  283. 283
    YAB attack says:


    If you value your widescreen plasma or LED get the old CRT out and surround yourself with objects to throw at the TV

    Yasmin Alibhai-Brown is on QT next

  284. 284
    649 piggies on the make says:

    That’s cool!
    We’ve all got to be something.

  285. 285
    Frank the Greek says:

    Ultimately, who gives a fuck anyway?

  286. 286
    It's who you know says:

    Fern cotton relative of Billy cotton. Nepotism it’s in The Beebs DNA

  287. 287
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    Dave Walsh’s sore arse looks very tempting to me, for £50 I reckon it’s worth a go!

  288. 288
    President Herman Van Rompuy says:

    AV or FPTP?
    Either way i’m a winner.

  289. 289
    tell it like it really is says:

    I’m in agreement with you H Higgins, could I just add that China has also taken over most of Africa, for all the sandal wearing tree huggers, the Chinese are the hardest overseers the natives have ever had, fact.

  290. 290
    Billy Bowdens Mum says:

    Calm down dear, and suck on Mummy’s tit.

  291. 291
    Yasmin Alibhai-Brown says:

    I fucking hate you Douglas!

  292. 292
    Kev. says:

    Lefty Hunts on QT starting on about OBL’s death……………………………

  293. 293
    tell it like it really is says:

    They are only stopped momentarily – this takeover is what they want all over the country with the attendant corruption – in spades …………am I allowed to say that?

  294. 294
    Cast Iron Dave says:

    Indeed you are, here’s another billion.

  295. 295
    Patrick Magee says:

    Why put an enemy combatant on trial when it’s much easier to just assassinate them?

  296. 296
    Christ on a Bike says:

    Oh, so it is. I thought it was a performing seal in a red cardigan

  297. 297
    David Camoron is a cunt says:

    You think so small.

    Dave fucks-away tens of billions.

  298. 298
    City of Vice says:

    Jasmin Alibaba Bollox and Paddy Pantsdown talking absolute bollox on Question Time and its only 5mins into the programme, bleating about Osama bin Laden’s ooman rights…

    What the fuck!!!!

  299. 299
    Douglas says:

    Thank you.

  300. 300
    FrankFisher says:

    Damn. Paddy Ashdown making far more sense than Murray. He’s such a pompus prick, but he is right. YAB is just a dumb mouthy coont, but that’s to be expected

    Shooting an unarmed man is unjustified – if you know him to be unarmed. The Yanks are *maybe* in the right if they really though OBL was fitted with a booby trap. Maybe.

  301. 301
    tatmong says:

    I’m tat! I’m a mong! Yap yap yap yap! Wheeeee!

  302. 302
    LibLabCon = liars says:

    And the US Navy SEALS to shoot out cretin MPs in the head.

  303. 303
    What a c'unt says:

    And yet you’re hanging on their every word.

  304. 304
    Exterminate says:

    The Americans thought it safer to shoot everyone before a wedding broke out

  305. 305
    LibLabCon = liars says:

    Nuke them all, just to be sure.

  306. 306
    Ian Tomlinson says:

    What sort of democracy prides itself on executing people willy nilly?

  307. 307
    City of Vice says:

    By thy name name shall ye be know. Apt.

  308. 308
    Fuck Political Correctness says:

    Rowan Williams is a weirdie-beardie c’unt.

    I hope every fairy-worshipping Christian cretin looks at the fucking retard and realises what utter c’unts they are.

  309. 309
    Small Business Owner says:

    Hey you, stop pissing my money up the wall and where’s that fuckin’ Lisbon referendum Dave?

  310. 310
    Fuck Political Correctness says:

    Shut your fucking face you muzzie bitch. Fuck off to pah kiss tan. C’unting bitch.

  311. 311
    tell it like it really is says:

    I have finally come up with a use for Aliliar Brown – stick her on the top of a pole as a wethervane, she is an opportunist, verbose sack of sh*t.

  312. 312
    What a c'unt says:

    By thy apoplectic reaction shall you be known.

  313. 313
    Dimblebrain says:

    In the interests of balance, I’ll cut Douglas off just when he’s getting interesting, but let Yasmin wail on for hours about how she can sympathise with the victims

  314. 314
    9/11 Family Victim says:

    Take that you fucking appeasing bitch!

  315. 315
    Yasmin Alibhai-Brown says:

    I do talk some shit.

  316. 316
    What a c'unt says:

    And yet that sack of shit is living the high life courtesy of your taxes.

  317. 317
    City of Vice says:


  318. 318
    £142:50? Fuck off before i set the dog on you says:

    But the money’s good.

  319. 319
    Billy Bowdens Mum says:

    Don’t feel left out tat, mummy has two tits you know.

  320. 320
    What a c'unt says:

    Said the braindead viewer pretending to sleep through the license fee.

  321. 321
    Anonymous says:

    Asking “do you want both the ballot papers, or just one of them?” is a bit like the tax man asking “do you want to declare all your income, or just declare some of it and let me fill-in the rest of the form for you?”

    or, like the police saying “so, your wife was hacked to death with a machete by someone who broke into your house; do you want us to try and look for the person who did it, or should we just go home and forget it ever happened?”

    You should always be given ALL the relevant ballot papers, and then it’s up to you once you’ve got them all which (if any) of those you want to fill-in, spoil, set light to, or stick up Nick Clegg’s arse (or a combination of those things) – those “spare” ballot papers aren’t bloody tesco receipts for a packet of fags, they’re fucking votes for christ’s sake.

  322. 322
    David Dimbleby says:

    You there, fourth from the left in the red jumper.
    Got anything interesting to say or are you just a c’unt?

  323. 323
    I Squiggle says:

    Postal Votes?

    I voted in Lambeth this evening, obviously AV only. Not a great crowd when I got there, but a steady stream. When I got to the desk there was an elderly couple talking to a functionary – they were being denied the right to vote. Reason? They had filled in a postal vote application form, they had part of it with them. I received the same form, couple of week’s back, very official looking and needed a second look to understand what it was about. It was from the ‘Yes’ campaign.

    When I, quite vociferously, asked that they be allowed to vote notwithstanding, I was told that wasn’t possible because they were down as having applied for a postal vote. All correct and proper, but that form wasn’t. It looked very official, had the Lambeth council address on it, and, as mentioned, I had to take a second glance. The functionary was very polite, but adamant. She also mentioned that it wasn’t the first instance they’d had today. I have no idea whether the people present, nor the myriad others previously, would have voted Yes or No, but there were plenty, apparently, denied that choice.

    FOI to the Returning Office, Lambeth?

    Obviously if the ‘No’s get it, I’d be relieved, but if the other way round, goodness, I wish I’d not binned that form. But still, I’d want to make the point that the ‘Yes’ campaign were at best being devious, at worst being Liberal Democrat Local Election Tactics as Normal.

  324. 324
    The Vicar of Bray says:

    The killing of an unarmed man is always going to leave a very uncomfortable feeling, especially when carried out by our brave boys in the Met at a tube station barely a mile up the road from Lambeth Palace. But one keeps very quiet on these occasions for fear of upsetting relations with dear dear Tony and dear dear Gordon.

  325. 325
    Santa says:

    I voted ho ho ho.

    I’ll get me coat.

  326. 326
    Barack Obama says:

    Let’s give the n*gger a fair trial before we get on with the lynching!

  327. 327
    Wise Ol' Sage says:

    Same in High Peak (Derbyshire). I was asked if I wanted an AV ballot as well as local elections.

  328. 328
    The President of the USA says:

    Executing bushy bearded Muslim c u n t z ? I have no problem with that.

  329. 329
    Well Paid Shill says:

    The SEALS shouldn’t have shot Bin Laden, Obama should’ve blown his brains out live on the whitehouse lawn.

  330. 330
    FFS says:



  331. 331
    QWERTY says:

    Are there any bummers on the panel?

  332. 332
    Amy Whinehouse says:

    I voted no no no.

  333. 333
    QWERTY says:

    Have to say Firefox with noscript makes this site run 100 times faster than normal

  334. 334
    QWERTY says:

    I voted no to Nick Clegg today

  335. 335
    City of Vice says:

    Incredible. Yamin Ali Bollox has been given air time by the BBC to wine on OT about Bin Laden not getting a decent muslim burial. Lefty twats…

    Someone should remind this Ali Bollox twat of the thousands of innocent people who were murdered by OBL’s muzzie twats on 9/11 (and elsewhere) without any regard to the niceities of their victims religious rights.

    They should have pissed on OBL’s body before wrapping it in bacon and feeding him to the dogs.

  336. 336
    Ian Tomlinson says:

    “bushy bearded Muslim c u n t z”

    That’s me safe then.

  337. 337
    Yasmin Alibhai-Brown says:

    I think your all blood thirsty barbarians, Osama bin Laden’s body should have been cared for and respected and wrapped in white linen. Then and only then presented to his family to then be buried in Mecca and become a shrine to terrorism, Insha’Allah!

  338. 338
    Fatminge Alleyway Brown says:

    Everything is warm, fuzzy and cuddly in my Fairy Dairy Land.

  339. 339
    Douglas says:

    Hiya sweety pie!

  340. 340
    Anonymous says:

    Exit stage right?

  341. 341
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    Have you worked out the duckworth lewis method yet?

  342. 342
    Voter with a grudge says:

    I think your all blood thirsty barbarians.
    Every MP’s body guilty of expense troughing should have been cared for and respected and wrapped in white linen. Then and only then presented to his family to then be buried in Westminster and become a shrine to thieving gits.

  343. 343
    Benny Ratzenberger says:

    Don’t shoot when she’s not on the blob?

  344. 344
    Lefty BBC rent'a'mob says:


    The sun shines out of Andy Burnham arse, so shut the fuck up Ashdown!

  345. 345
    Burnt Ham is a total cunt says:

    I never had much of an opinion on Burnham before but he’s been an absolute lying c unt on Question Time tonight, aided by a typical Labour audience.

  346. 346
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin says:


  347. 347
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m c’unt, I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before.

  348. 348
    I've ate balls says:

    Andy looks like norman wisdom spliced with a baby giraffe

  349. 349
    Fuck off, Yazspleen says:

    I missed most of Question Time but is it true that Alibi Clown actually complained that Bin Laden’s rights were violated? Unfuckingbelievable. I hope Douglas Murray told her where to stick her opinion.

  350. 350
    Yuck says:

    Oh christ. Harriet Dromey’s on the panel of guests on bbc1’s election coverage. The Tory guest is Baroness Farcey.

  351. 351
    Lord Paddy Osama Ashdown says:

    I am a pius, self righteous prick.

  352. 352
    The BBC shows its true colours says:

    Yes he was awful and the carefully selected BBC audience full on labour supporters.

    I even found myself supporting Pantsdown’s despair at the bearpit he was in.

    The BBC has out done itself this time in their Labour bias. And why did the chairman keep producing political literature from the bottom shelf.

    On a positive note. I will not now be volunteering for a Telly Tax on the new TV

  353. 353
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Very interesting point by paddy pantsdown that brown and the other leadership candidates realising the fuckin state the country was in decided to go into opposition and refused to join a coalition with clegg

  354. 354
    annette curton says:

    Barm pot Yasmin on again, but had a laugh when a member of the panel said something about drawing a veil over the situation.

  355. 355
    The enemy within ! says:

    And i suck the cock of bin laden !

  356. 356
    joolz says:

    he gives away our gold and then he gives away everything this country fought for.


  357. 357
    joolz says:

    first time ive heard that one, seems the liebour kept that quiet.

  358. 358
    Yuck says:

    Yep. And notice how Burnham was panicking at Ashdown letting the cat out the bag about Labour’s attitude behind closed doors.

  359. 359
    The Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

    Agree but the impartial audience did NOT want to hear that and neither did the BBC chaiman.

    Robin Day would never have allowed such bias

  360. 360
    The enemy within ! says:

    That was the worst single party audience ever

  361. 361
    Andy JS says:

    SNP target list:

    Welsh Labour targets:

    Welsh Conservative targets:

  362. 362
    The enemy within ! says:

    The truth always hurts !

  363. 363
    @JamesEllison92 says:


    Can we use smileys?
    :lol: :) :D :( :roll: :? :shock: :P :x ;) :mrgreen: :cry:

  364. 364
    Emily Maitlis the Tranny BBC Presenter says:

    Look at my big hands and my tranny like face isn’t it lovely, hey check out my slim hips too, so boy like don’t you think? Oh yes it’s such a give away when I point it all out don’t you all think?

    BTW I fucking love myself!

  365. 365
    The BBC says:

    The BBC always strives for total impartiality and balance in our political and news programming. We’re sorry that you felt we let you down on this occasion. Your comments are valued and will be passed to the editorial team. If you wish to attend a future edition of Question Time, please email us with details of which party you normally vote for, and what benefits if any you get.

  366. 366
    The BBC's Shame says:

    Quite. Ashdown was so angry that he was starting to let all the cats out of the bag. Burnham’s tactic was to be ever more inflamatory and unfortunately it worked (with the help of the chair)

    The BBC neary had the political scoop of the year but they did Not want to hear it or broadcast it.


  367. 367
    YASMIN i've sucked BinLadens Cock Brown says:

    She should be banged up as an alki ada sympathiser !

  368. 368
    BBC Equal opportunities employer says:

    And your complaint is ?

  369. 369
    Labour scrape the barrel says:

    Labour have really brought out their, ahem, top guns tonight. Harpic on the bbc and David Lammy on sky.

  370. 370
    A radical for all occasions says:

    I reckon Labour have correctly briefed their radical supporters on how to apply for QT audience tickets.

  371. 371
    Not bad at all says:

    Say what you like about Warsi but she’s quite cute.

  372. 372

    AND David Dimbleby.

  373. 373
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    Yes that’s very interesting indeed, so Labour pissed all over it and passed to parcel as it were, like we didn’t know that already.

    But now I guess it’s finally official and on the record.

  374. 374

    Talking of Transvestites I would Like to thank my wife the lovely
    Harriet Halfman For managing to fit me into a safe Labour seat from an all women shortlist
    I wear her knickers you know ! i do i do

  375. 375
    Spineless Amatures says:

    That was their get out of jail free card
    they feckin knew what state the finances were in
    and didn’t have a clue how to put it right
    so they did one !

  376. 376
    A Gay Man in Stealth says:

    Telling the truth?

  377. 377
    Anonymous says:

    The electoral guidelines/laws are very clear; the polling clerk (or presiding officer) should first check which ballot papers are relevant to the person presenting their polling card, and then give them ALL the relevant ballot papers.

    The clerk should never ever ask “which ones do you want?”

    There is no ambiguity about this whatsoever in the guidelines/laws; it’s crystal clear; the clerk should always give the voter all relevant ballot papers.

    If for some reason the voter refuses to accept one of the ballot papers, then the clerk has to go through a pain-in-the-arse process of logging which one got refused, saving it in case they come back before the polls close etc. By saying “you don’t really want both of these, do you?” the clerk is pretty much proving that they intend to fill in the ballot paper himself later on and sneak it into the box; there’s really no other explanation for such a “do you want both?” question from a polling clerk.

  378. 378
    Emily Maitlis says:

    But I have no Adam’s apple!

    Chondrolaryngoplasty had nothing to do with this at all.

  379. 379
    Southern Softy says:

    Lisbon – Lisbon? – that’s Portugal, isn’t it?
    No wonder they’ve had to call in the receivers.
    The Brown effect at work again.

  380. 380
    Southern Softy says:

    Show us the pictures.
    And blow them up.
    So we can see the details.
    I want to see the ripcord.
    Or was it the spinal cord.

  381. 381
    joolz says:

    i wood :-)

  382. 382
    Keeping to the, er, thread says:

    I knew Fern’s sister Polly.

  383. 383
    Keeping to the, er, thread says:

    I think they got voted out…

  384. 384
    Keeping to the, er, thread says:

    The only superinjun I know is that Geronimo bloke.

  385. 385
    Anonymous says:

    Same thing happening in Basildon, Essex. I have reported it to the electoral fraud commission.

  386. 386
    Anonymous says:

    Went in to Vote and was handed my Council Ballot Paper. I was then asked if I wanted the Referendum Ballot Paper. Pretty certain they should just have handed over both.

  387. 387
    PD77 says:

    Or they turned it in to a Baby Milk Factory, every building in the Middle East becomes a Baby Milk Factory at some time so why not the Subcontinent?

  388. 388
    Lost my marbles says:

    I got three papers being in Wales – two of them went into one box, and the referendum one went into the other box.

  389. 389
    Anonymous says:

    if they ask, always say no!

  390. 390
    Sicko says:

    This is an 18th century code of honour being used in the grubby 21st century. This is no longer an age when only gentlemen can vote; the current quaint system is, regrettably, no longer fit for purpose.

  391. 391
    Sicko says:

    Really? I’ve read that their modus operandii is to ship in workers from China to exploit the farming/mining rights which they have bought.

    There are no language hurdles, no need to train or manage local people.

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

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