March 29th, 2011

Lembit for London

There is a LibDem establishment campaign to prevent Lembit Öpik becoming their candidate for London Mayor. This is a mistake. The LibDems are likely to be annihilated in the Mayoral race if they put forward a nonentity candidate.

With Lembit they will get media coverage in what will be a battle of strong personalities, without him they will be ignored. Like Boris and Ken, Lembit has single-name recognition, he is media friendly and will hold his own in hustings. If the LibDems choose anyone else they will be shooting themselves in the foot.


  1. 1
    Lemsip Ropedick says:

    Am I not a non-entity or am I a known titty ??

  2. 2
    jgm2 says:

    Lembit is a fuckwit. He’s unelectable. As evidenced by his lack of election.

  3. 3
    twatspotter says:

    Once a twat, always a twat.

  4. 4
    Lou Scannon says:

    ‘If the LibDems choose anyone else they will be shooting themselves in the foot’ ….. which will make them the Limp Dems.

  5. 5
    PollingStation says:

    “If the LibDems choose ANYONE else” really? there’s not ONE other potential candidate that could save them from oblivion?

  6. 6
    jgm2 says:


    Did anybody notice that it is only after three years post-Brown recession that the BBC/Panorama last night realised that nobody was getting any pay rises and that inflation is out of control?

    They weren’t too worried about that when it was 2008 and it was private companies who couldn’t afford a payrise and losing a million jobs and when it was Labour printing 200bn quid, borrowing another 500bn quid and trashing the currency were they?


  7. 7
    Dilligaff says:

    He may be recognisable but if he identifies your party with an accident-prone bollock dropper then he becomes an even greater electoral liability around the country.

  8. 8
    Barry says:

    All parties are going to have the same problem with elected Police Commissioners. Do you put up a trusty party hack, or a name who will not toe the Party Line?

  9. 9
    You must be fucking joking! says:

    Jedward has name recognition but you would have to be brain damaged to vote for them.

    Lemsip couldn’t shoot himself in the foot with a custom made foot shooting cannon.

    Your political judgement is as big a joke as Opik.

  10. 10
    The Penguin says:

    He’ll sort out a decent asteroid defence shield for London.

    The Penguin

  11. 11
    YorkshireLad says:

    No doubt he has bloody good entertainment value, but precious little else.

  12. 12
    Billy Bowden is the world's best umpire ! says:

    “We’re planning a fight in a pub car park, and we wondered if Ed Miliband would like to come and say a few words”.

  13. 13
    Ken Lorp says:

    The LibDems don’t have any electable people on the roster for London mayor. The best they can hope for is that they don’t get completely ignored in the campaign – that’s why Lembit is the man!

  14. 14
    jgm2 says:

    Oh, I suspect that when it comes to shooting yourself in the foot Lembit could shoot himself in the foot with a biro. He strikes me as a chap with infinite capacity for shooting himself foot-wise.

  15. 15
    Taxfodder says:

    I quite like old Lembit.

    I quite like Boris too….

    Both are media tarts very amusing and highly entertaining.

    Ideal candidates why not a job share, in true coalition style they could also do charity Panto at Christmas.

    But if it can only be one then as they say, only one way to find out……….

  16. 16
    Calamity Clegg's Death Spiral says:

    Nope, they will be annihilated regardless of who they put up.

  17. 17
    Lemsip Obit says:

    He isn’t that competent. You need some degree of hand eye dexterity to shoot yourself in the foot. He would stab himself in the eye with the biro first.

  18. 18
    Kevin T says:

    Ken and his half dozen familes. Boris and his serial adultery. Lembit and his pop star girlfriends. It’s win-win for the News of the World, whatever about London!

  19. 19
    Red Ken ( 'pond life' ) Livingscum says:

    Me for mayor. Me,me,me,me !!!!!!!

  20. 20

    Lembit is the Lib Dems version of Boris… I was informed by a lib dem acquaintance that he got thrashed in the polls because he ignored his constituency and focused on being a celebrity. Seems ideal then for London Mayor don’t you think?

  21. 21
    Chris Hoon says:

    Anyone remember me ?

  22. 22
    Harry Hill says:

    Miliband v Balls.


  23. 23
    Calamity Clegg says:

    I solemnly pledge that Lembit Obit will be the next mayor of London.

  24. 24
    Ampers says:

    You wrote; “Lembit is a fuckwit. He’s unelectable.”

    Perhaps it might be a good idea to choose him then :-)

    And “they will be shooting themselves in the foot.” I thought this is what politicians do?


  25. 25
    jgm2 says:

    Boris has upset the bedwetters again…

    Top bloke.

  26. 26

    That is enough for me.

  27. 27
    Observer says:

    “Nonentity”, rather than “non-entity”.

  28. 28
    Tessa Tickles says:

    I’m not sure the swivel-eyed idiot’s eyes stay still long enough for him to do that.

  29. 29

    Very witty – for you.

  30. 30

    Please stop trying to apply objective logic to the Beeb, the only outcome of such a task is a messy self-implosion.

  31. 31
    Cheeky Girl says:

    I can confirm he always shot early and always missed the target.

  32. 32
    Forester says:

    Mike Hancock has a sufficiently high profile to be Lib Dem candidate.

  33. 33
    Steve Miliband says:

    Wouldn’t expect anything less from the State Broadcaster.
    I listened to Today this morning as there were no kids present – Humphries is so aggressive – in his mind a good interview is all about harrying the interviewee with obtuse questions to try and get them to say something they regret, rather than having a grown up discussion

  34. 34
    Tessa Tickles says:

    If it deflected the asteroids onto Bradford, he might be on to a winner.

  35. 35

    ““Nonentity” rather than “non-entity”” rather than “Nonentity”, rather than “non-entity””.

    A superfluous comma there, Mr Ob.

  36. 36
    Sky News - First for Breaking Wind says:

    F A A A R R T!

  37. 37
    Rob.C says:

    Yeah I fuckin did….

  38. 38
    Tessa Tickles says:

    It’s today’s Matt cartoon.

  39. 39

    Ed Miliband, the Harry Carpenter of politics.

  40. 40
    NCP says:

    Lembit Opik, and his mates Simon Hughes, Nick Clegg etc want to turn every town and village into a mini-version of the hell-hole that is London. Who needs Labour when you’ve got the Lib Dems running things?

  41. 41
    Bad memory for insignificance says:


  42. 42
    Hugh Janus says:

    Lifted word for word from today’s Matt cartoon in the DT, Guido.

  43. 43
    Steve Miliband says:

    Semi-colon needed?

  44. 44
    lol says:

    Don’t just blame the Limp Dems. It’s the local Tory MP who’s busy turning Cirencester into Mogadishu!

  45. 45
    Put it in the curry says:

    THAT will stop the local taxi drivers molesting white children.

    In fact, it will stop the corner shop owners doing it too.

  46. 46
    Lemsip Optic says:

    What would Kerry Katona do?

  47. 47
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Not a very fair fight; Balls would rip Miliband apart. As indeed he will.

  48. 48
    Huhne says:

    Opik will do better than that simpering shirt lifter Paddick.

  49. 49
    Anonymous says:

    Maybe Cleggy has to ask Cammers if it is alright for Opik to run for mayor, after all we are all in this together, shame really, it could lead to a new comedt duo Boris and Lem

  50. 50
    Tessa Tickles says:

    “Dr Chakraborti, who is of Indian descent, encountered verbal abuse during the study. “

    Not because he’s of Indian descent, but because he’s a c’unt.

  51. 51

    You appear to be suggesting a longer mental pause than a simple comma is required; typical.

  52. 52
    Anonymous says:

    Who is she, sounds like a foreigner to me

  53. 53
    Red Ed's Rioters says:

    Too fast, too deep ?

  54. 54
    Anonymous says:

    Surely that should be low profile

  55. 55
    South of the M4 says:

    The guys a qualified pilot so hand to eye coordination must be good. Having said that though, I am always surprised he manages to get down every time he goes up. The Libs have no chance in London, so they might as well be remembered for something.

  56. 56
    Anonymous says:

    Have you asked Dave? You must get his approval

  57. 57
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Speaking of twats, John Major’s 68 today.

  58. 58
    PD77 says:

    You’re easily amused Guido ;)

  59. 59
    Steve Miliband says:

    Are there any other Lib Dems left who aren’t MP’s?

  60. 60
    Sir William Waad says:

    I suspect a sinister Fawkesian plot to sabotage the LibDems by inducing them not to pick Mr Opik. Or perhaps it is a sinister Fawkesian plot to sabotage the LibDems by tricking them into picking Mr Opik. Actually I think picking Opik would give a clear signal that the LibDems knew they had no chance of winning and were choosing a joke candidate just to gain some publicity.

  61. 61
    Dave.....Sit! says:

    Obamarama has spoken. Will Dave play faithful poodle or independent pitbull?

    Having said that, I think if Dave were a dog then he would be a Golden labrador.

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    Why, it could be the start of a new comedy duo, Boris & Lem

  63. 63
    David Camoron says:

    Not now! I’m busy handing the daily £48million payment to van Rumpypumpy again.

    Every penny saved in budget cuts is a penny I can give to the EU!

    Toodle pip!

  64. 64
    SocialGhism says:

    C’mon Limpdick get in the race. I don’t understand what the Liberal Effeminate’s think they have to lose.

    A single headline even in jest would be a step up for them now.

  65. 65
    Gordon 4 Mayor says:

    Where’s Gordon?

  66. 66
    'Dave' from Roswell, NM says:

    I’d vote for Lembit if I lived in London…

  67. 67
    No hopers says:

    “If the LibDems choose anyone else they will be shooting themselves in the foot.”

    Not really Guido, whoever they choose, that person will come third or less.

  68. 68
    Tory Disco says:

    cheeky cheeky

  69. 69
    South of the M4 says:

    I watched the pre-election debate on the Welsh channel set in Limpits constituency and with him on the panel. He received a serious ear bashing about his expenses. He just did not see why the audience thought this was important -or why they should be concerned about what MP’s get up to. This was indeed his undoing. Given the paucity of the other candidates, his election result was a massive vote against him rather than for anybody else.

  70. 70
    Anonymous says:

    It always blows from the sewage farm, funny how all those missing emails have suddenly been found @ NoW, now that could be construde as with holding evidence, something certainly smells

  71. 71
    Cash 4 Votes says:

    No need to mate. Just use an accommodation address in tower Hamlets.

  72. 72
    Tessa Tickles says:

    If Dave were a dog, he’d be this dog:

  73. 73
    Anonymous says:

    Found any aliens lately?

  74. 74
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    He might have name recognition within a smallish group but certainly not on the scale of Ken and Boris.

    I always get the impression he is the sort of bloke that will try to hump a woman’s leg at a party.

  75. 75
    Kerry Collins says:

    I thought Kerry was a man’s name.

  76. 76
    smoggie says:

    Quotation marks, no spelling mistakes and funny.

    Clearly not Bill’s.

  77. 77

    Brown was unelectable. Fuck what happened to him… Look what happened to us!

  78. 78
    Red ED says:

    I would be a Chow Chow

  79. 79
    'Dave' from Roswell, NM says:

    You don’t need to look to hard…ever seen ‘Men in Black’ ?
    Nearer the truth than you might think :-)
    Ooooh…think I’ve said too much.
    Better get back to Rigel 7…

  80. 80
    YorkshireLad says:

    At least Harry’s knowledge of boxing was far superior to Ed’s knowledge of reality

  81. 81
    QWERTY says:

    At least Limpdick knows how to get hold of totty

    I’d like to get hold of her majority.

  82. 82
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Too true – there have only been a small number of economic commentators properly scrutinising Brown’s gross mismanagement of the economy – off the top of my head Jeff Randall, Ambrose Evans-Pritchard, Jeremy Warner and surprisingly perhaps Larry Elliott in The Guardian who was warning about the housing bubble well before it burst.

  83. 83
    election watcher says:

    They could do a job share. Boris could be the ‘Day Mayor’ and Lemsip could be the ‘Night Mayor’.

  84. 84
    Chris Bryant & Lord Fondelbum says:

    Oh yes please!

  85. 85
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    you are probably right. but that makes it a circus.

  86. 86
    Ana Gram says:

    Limb Poke It

  87. 87
  88. 88
    Toby Carvery says:

    Polly Toynbee and her Labour Party Friends really are the unacceptable face of capitalism

  89. 89
    Anonymous says:

    Oh dear the difficulty some people have in giving up the public teat.

  90. 90
    Gordon Brown says:

    I had a little ‘Shitsue’ once. I blamed her for everything.

  91. 91
    Mike Hunt says:

    He could do with a third job.

  92. 92
    Fa Kin Su Pah says:

    He’s odd looking, has strange facial characteristics,
    is a publicity seeker, has no apparent qualities
    of leadership, is weak willed and lacks moral fibre.
    A perfect choice.

  93. 93
    McPoison says:


  94. 94
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Lib Dems aint gotta hope in hell of ousting Bories

  95. 95
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    smoggie, why don’t you fuck off and shoot yourself in the knackers?

  96. 96
    MiguelM says:

    Nonentity is all one word, no hyphen required. Education, education, education!

  97. 97
    Anonymous says:

    Well I never.

  98. 98
    Jonah Brown says:

    I would be a Gordon setter

  99. 99
    Who cares says:

    The Mayor of Sh*tehole sounds apt for a Libsh*te, doesn’t matter who wins, the once capital of England has nothing to do with the rest of England.

  100. 100
    Limpdick O'Prick says:

    “Jedward has name recognition but you would have to be brain damaged to vote for them.”

    Over 40% would vote Labour at the moment, so there’s no shortage of the fucking brain damaged.

  101. 101
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    I’m a socialist, I like to share, nobody else has the right to this job, I, Me, me mememmemmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmeemee

  102. 102
    bringing home the bacon says:

    A big bonus for us all at peppa pig world in fact.

  103. 103
    Tachybaptus says:

    Happy birthday then, to our last prime minister who had a reasonable resemblance to a human being.

  104. 104
    YorkshireLad says:

    Lie back and think of her bank balance

  105. 105
    bbc says:

    Good a new line of attack. Right, were on it. What does balls want us to say.

  106. 106
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Isn’t he always on-the-job, with those ru’s.

  107. 107
    Limpdick O'Prick says:

    I thought Deep Impact was a porn movie.

  108. 108
    Anonymous says:

    Muslim model defends Miss Universe contest bid
    Shanna Bukhari, who is 24 and lives in Manchester, said she’s been sent racist and abusive messages since making it to the beauty contest’s UK final.

    She believes Muslims in the UK should be allowed to have a western lifestyle.

    But Muslim groups have accused her of disrespecting Islam.

    Well if the muzzies don’t want to live like civilised white folks then they should fuck off to Islam is bad.

  109. 109
    Charlie Gilmour says:


  110. 110
    lispy says:

    I liked Harry Carpenter. Ed Milliband is a twat.

    On another note, why did big ears Marr cut off Amanda Platell the other morning when she was asking Patrick Stewart if, as an actor, he could train Milliband out of the funny way he talks?

  111. 111
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    I think the second job goes to slimy toad man, no contest.

  112. 112
    Club Class says:

    I’m here!!!!

  113. 113
    Shrieking with anger, Baroness Warsi's Burqa says:

    The name “peppa pig world” is objectionable. By the power invested in me by David Cameron’s Conservative Party, the name is changed by order to “Peppa Halal Falafel Caliphate.” You will also change your moniker.

    If you don’t like it, get out of my country!

  114. 114
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I had a mental pause that lasted 2 and a half years once.

  115. 115
    Bob Crow says:

    Me an’ all.

  116. 116
    Harry Hill says:


  117. 117
    Tessa Tickles says:

    English is still spoken on the streets sometimes, so they say.

  118. 118
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Firefox + NoScript. It’s pretty much essential here.

  119. 119
    Tessa Tickles says:


    If a ‘western lifestyle’ is considered bv muzzies to “disrespect Islam”, then what hope is there for integration?

  120. 120
    Call me Dickhead Heir to Blair Camoron says:

    As brain damaged as anyone who fucking votes for Blair’s lightweight mini-me.

  121. 121
    YorkshireLad says:

    O/T – referring to Billy’s blatant plagarism re Matt’s cartoon in the DT
    Have a look at these:

  122. 122

    What the fuck do you care you twat? You don’t fucking live here you Belgian fuckwit.

  123. 123
    baseball bat says:

    Gordon has always been very clubbable, IMHO.

  124. 124
    moonbat watch says:

    So according to you the whole of the fucking electorate is brain damaged. It’s always the mark of a true nutter that they think everyone else is bonkers, so well done for pointing yourself out…….nutter.

  125. 125
    The Sheikh Of Arabeeee says:

    You must be fucking kidding.

    Vote for that twisty-faced dickhead?

    Fuck off.

  126. 126
    Maximus says:

    > Your political judgement is as big a joke as Opik.

    You say that resentfully. That’s a pity. Be happy — call out Gouranga if you need to — but share Guido’s glee. Lemsip as mayoral candidate will make a laughing stock of the Limp Dems like nothing else. In this era of cuts, every little larf helps.

  127. 127
    lost withiel says:

    Vince Cable could do it, he obviously hates being BizSec.

  128. 128
    bergen says:

    Lembit managed to lose one of their safest seats with an immense swing against him because the good people of Montgomery were heartily sick of him and his puerile antics.He’s the last person they need as a candidate unless they deliberately want to field a laughing-stock.

  129. 129
    low resolution fox says:

    Well he did practically throw away his campaign in comical style to a strong Tory candidate in an area Labour historically do a bit rubbish in. No surprise the right-sided press would want to big him up to reduce the Labour vote and help old Bojo in.

    He’s not a bad guy at all, eccentric but intelligent enough. Guess he was probably just an intellectual geeky type when he was young.

  130. 130
    Rufus Stone says:

    Who is? Limpdick or Ed Millitwat?

  131. 131
    Southern Softy says:

    And DP today – 3 people talking over each other for 1/2 hour.
    Why won’t Brillo ask a question and then

  132. 132
    Geoff says:

    The sad thing is that Jedward would probably win. We live in the age of celebrity, God help us.

  133. 133

    Let the Lib-DemNazis put forward whoever pleases them. Look, Guido old fellow, don’t you want them to fail? Why do good and decent commentators, who ought to know better, keep on shilling-up the notion that the leftyNazis ought to have better ideas? Like saying Millbanana has no policies and he’d better get some? (I’m not saying you said that, but you get my drift.)

    We do not want them to have any ideas at all: we don’t want Milibanana to have policies: we don’t want hre limp dems to have policies….instead we want their memes to become abolished. It is the Way Forward, going forward, to have no socialism at all.

    Any other scenario spells death.

  134. 134

    I may be a fuckwit but I am not Belgian… I probably have more at stake in the UK than you do, nonce projector.

  135. 135
    QWERTY says:

    They get free benefits, you don’t get that in Islam, oh and you can plant bombs on tube trains and get the backing of the BBC/Guardian for doing it.

  136. 136
    Paul Marks says:

    Agreed Guido.

    Opik would lose – but it would be worse for the LibDems with someone else.

  137. 137
    Al says:

    Although by choosing him they’ll shoot themselves in the other foot!

  138. 138
    Dream baby got me draming sweet dreams etc says:

    I think Edward B**lls already has the job of Nightmare.

  139. 139
    Dream baby got me draming sweet dreams etc says:

    Likewise. Why do people never learn? This advice comes up in almost every thread.

  140. 140
    The only Lib dem voter says:

    “”Lembit is a fuckwit. He’s unelectable. As evidenced by his lack of election””

    Yes … but he’s our fuckwit. And people remember him for Sian Lloyd and that Cheeky Girl….

    He may be unelectable – but he’s more electable than any other lib dem

  141. 141
    Anonymous says:

    Quite simply the Lib Dems know there’s a lot more on Opik to come out. His life style problems defy belief. His drunkeness and shagging around know no bounds. He’s been a lucky bugger up till now – the truth about this pervert has yet to emerge. He really is a revolting piece of work and arrogant to boot. Lembit Grope-it just does not get it…..

Seen Elsewhere

Ministry of Justice Loses Death Inquiry Data “In the Post” | TechnoGuido
Europe’s Crisis is Cameron’s Opportunity | Speccie
Sajid Javid is the Ultimate Thatcherite | Buzzfeed
Ed Argar Selected in Dorrell Seat | Leicester Mercury
88% of New Labour MPs Are Union Bods | Mark Wallace
Massively Popular Porn Site is Infecting Users | Techno Guido
Newspapers No Longer Willing to Toe Party Line | Roy Greenslade
Introducing the New CapX | CapX
Burnham’s Newsnight Debacle Dissected | Dan Hodges
How I Survived Dry January | Nigel Farage
Greens are Commies in Disguise | Andrei Rogobete

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Dan Hodges on Labour unity

“We’ve heard a lot over the past few years about how Miliband has united Labour. But he has not united Labour. He has pacified Labour. He has placed it into a medically induced coma following the trauma of the party’s 2010 defeat.”

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,715 other followers