March 14th, 2011

Where’s Gordon™? – Being Leant On


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    He will bottle it anyway.

  2. 2
    Maddamar Qaddaffi says:

    Send him to Tripoli ! I lean on him .

  3. 3
    Dazza says:

    That should clear the place…

  4. 4

    Lets hope ” they lean him” so hard he collapses under a multitude of his own contradictions and is never seen again.

  5. 5
  6. 6

    Beware flying Nokia’s in the Chamber on budget day!

  7. 7

    “leant on”. “Lent on” suggests someone’s taken a mortgage out on him, which is unlikely.

  8. 8
    Popeye says:


    I want to hear him and watch him wriggling on his own hook!

  9. 9

    A lurch to the right then. Good.

  10. 10
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    It would be funny , If Gordon turned up , wanting ti give a speech and then had to wait till 10pm before he is called to spout his bullshit, in fron tof a empty chamber being cheered on by his two sons (Ed and Ed) , with only The Guardian and Labourlist printing any comment on what the tosser had to say.

  11. 11
    The BBC says:

    I am sure Comrade Nicolai will show complete impartiality in showing how the Tories eat our babies.

    Dos vedanya Tovarisch!

  12. 12
    AC1 says:

    Maybe he’ll be pancaked?

  13. 13
    Loungelizard says:

    Bannocked !

  14. 14

    Brown and Blair should have set up a British Sovereign Wealth Fund during their Tenure. They did not. Reason – it would have been a Socialist Measure. That in itself is enough to consign them both to the dustbin of History.

    If he starts to talk, then everyone must simply walk out of the chamber towards the toilets….

  15. 15
    Anon E Mouse says:

    I’m confused by this. Surely given the fact that Brown:-

    1. “saved the world”
    2. is ‘the greatest chancellor ever’ (c) Polly Tuscany et al.

    the PLP would be delighted to have the old bruser back to stick one over the Bullingdon Club oik.

  16. 16
    Popeye says:

    I really do want to hear him tell how he got rid of boom and bust, how he squared the circle and how he made black into white and left the golden legacy. I really do!

  17. 17
    streamfisher says:

    Reel it in, give it a good smack over the head with a priest and then gut it.

  18. 18
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Guido, Will you be doing a livechat for the front beench speeches?

    On Budget day?

  19. 19
    boulay says:

    “(Reuters) – Britain’s top-notch credit rating looks increasingly secure thanks to the government’s commitment to deficit reduction and a recovering banking sector, ratings agency Fitch said on Monday.”

  20. 20

    Does anyone still watch Question Time? Used to be amusing to see the hordes of Labourites, bussed in, en mass specially by the AlJaBeeba, clapping feverishly at any remotely anti Tory comment, but it got boring in the end.

  21. 21
    Guido knows my ISP says:

    It would be fun to pass a motion to get rid of Bercow and then nominate Brown, then he would have to turn up in the HoC and adress the PM, deputy PM, Chancellor etc.

  22. 22
    Tax Payer says:

    bit long? not sure you could spend that much time away from work, Billy?

  23. 23
    Sir William Waad says:

    Gordon has already written it, 40,000 words in green crayon.

  24. 24
    Labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    If he had any bottle to start with.

  25. 25
    AC1 says:

    I just want him to be banished.

  26. 26
    Tax Payer says:

    Chuka Umunna:

    “It was good to see the passion, it was good to see that oomph, more of it please.”

    Nick Brown, chief whip:

    “I really did think it was brilliant. It was from the heart, it was what he wanted to say. The personal details were very moving. I’ve seen 25 of Gordon’s speeches at the Labour conference and I think that was the best speech yet.”

    Angela Eagle, Treasury:

    “It was a tour de force. He spoke over the heads of all people who were sniping and directly to the British people to set out what drives him, and I think many will warm to that. He effectively apologised for the 10p rate of tax, which I think a lot of people wanted to hear.”

  27. 27
    Eunuchonomics says:

    Greg Hands is another boring sponger we can live without!

  28. 28
    Polly Toynbee et al says:

    La la la la I’m not listening.

  29. 29

    Let him speak!

    Maybe he’s finally going to say sorry?

  30. 30
    streamfisher says:

    I have noticed these types often have a go at writing childrens story books in their declining years, Is it, The Worm who Ate the Giant Peach?

  31. 31

    “*Let *him *speak!*Maybe* he’s* finally* going* to* say* sorry*

  32. 32


  33. 33
    Engineer says:

    I suspect it would be far more embarrassing for Labour than that. The entire government benches would make sure they were in the chamber for Brown’s speech, and he’d barely be able to get a word out for heckling. Indeed, it would be a good idea to have The Guinness Book of Records on hand to record the longest, loudest and most intense heckle in world history. The heckles would rain down so thick and fast that not only would Brown be utterly humiliated, but Hansard would be unable to record them all, and the squeaker would totally lose control. The Labour whips would want to avoid that – even Aljabeeba would have to broadcast clips of a unique parliamentary event; a former Prime Minister being hounded from the chamber by the sheer volume of heckles.

  34. 34
    Let's not beat about the bush says:

    Shot in the head?

  35. 35
    Anonymous says:

    We should start a petition to make sure Brown is allowed to speak. I know it’s a form of bear baiting but fuck it, the entertainment value would be tremendous .

  36. 36
    Smig says:

    Best to gag him and flush his head down the khazi for good measure.

  37. 37

    Calm down Polly.Pot
    Do some recycling. Sort out a final pollution.

  38. 38
    Bob says:

    Can he claim it as a fact finding tour on expenses?

  39. 39
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Please make the speech Gordon, it’s the only thing that would make recording BBC Parliament worth it.

  40. 40
    retardEd Miliband says:

    Uhmm. Yeah. Uh, that was all before we were allowed to admit that Brown was crap. And mad. Mad and crap. We didn’t tell you at the time that he was mad and crap because, erm, well we thought there was an off-chance of winning the election and, erm, keeping the crap madman in Number 10.

  41. 41
    retardEd Miliband says:

    The Labour Party Election Manifesto. You’ll find it in the fiction section.

  42. 42
    davey boy miliband says:

    Who on earth is Gordon Brown that everyone keeps going on about? I deny any knowledge of such a person.
    Ah, that’s much better!

  43. 43
    Smig says:

    Muh muh muh mister squeaker! Can I uh be excused! Edwin Himmler-Balls has stolen muh muh muh my homework and eaten muh muh muh my crayons.

  44. 44
  45. 45
    A wish come true says:

    From life itself.

  46. 46
    Engineer says:

    Also filed under Crime, Fantasy and most recently, History.

  47. 47
    Too many tweets make a twat says:

    Doesn’t she have a job?

  48. 48
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Someone find a final solution for the fuckin socailists!!!

  49. 49
    retardEd Miliband says:

    I wrote it mythelf, you know. And it was so good, I’ve dithowned it and replaced it with a blank theet of paper.

  50. 50
    retardEd Miliband says:

    How did you know? Have you been thpying on me?

  51. 51
    No mass-executions required (however desirable they might be) says:

    Abolish the BBC and make it illegal for left-wingers to work as teachers. Sorted.

  52. 52
    Twit Twats says:

    So many tweets! If I want to stalk these useless spongers I will go on twitter!

  53. 53
    Anonymous says:

    Is that “mortgage” as in “contract”? Oh I do hope so.

  54. 54
    Lt. Gen. Bertie Farquarson says:

    If he’s stopped, what a disappointment that will be for the coalition!

    The man’s a cad and a bounder!

  55. 55

    Technicians have lost the ability to cool down the chronic old over-reactor at the debt-ravaged Labour Party in northeastern Burnley, where previous eruptions have blown apart the economy in recent years.

    It was revealed Monday that the Fuk-u-UK No. 10 KirkCaldy plant could no longer control the temperature of the former chancellor. Industrial workers were pumping sea water into the atomic monocular in hopes of cooling him down and avoiding another potential electoral meltdown.

    “The fear is if he can’t be contained in Scotland he might slip down to parliament for the budget and he might blow up in our faces again. That would be very bad for the economy and for any remaining shred of credibility Labour posses.”

    The Nok-i-ay index continued to rise in anticipation.

  56. 56
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today I will be reaming paper.

  57. 57
    Smig says:

    Gold star for BQ MP :D

  58. 58
    Tw it - tw at - tw ot says:

    Sheet model, and a shit model.

  59. 59
    Parro et supra says:

    You forgot how he saved the world.

  60. 60
    arch Stanton says:


    Brown show up at the HoC and make a speech on Budget day ?

    He aint got the bottle.

    This is just Labour trying to draw attention to themselves and get the Conservatives excited

    The roars of laughter would be heard back in his constituency.

  61. 61
    Mike Hunt says:


  62. 62
    Daily Telegraph hack says:

    A rotten shag.

  63. 63
    Cads and Bounders says:

    Oi!! Do you mind??

  64. 64
    Hang 'em all says:


  65. 65
    I hate Blue Labour says:

    He won’t show.

    Stripped of his power, he’s now a joke. An impotent, worthless wretch.

    He wouldn’t dare show his face as there’s nothing to protect him from ridicule and laughter.

  66. 66
    Cream Puff says:

    It would be one of the rarest appearances yet!
    The good for sod all ,son of the manse has still to take part on Scottish Questions.
    Thats the bit before PMQ’s on the first Wednesday of the month, so not exactly taxing. Yet the SOB has never taken part, despite the fact that he is a Scottish MP representing a Scottish constituency. The guy like the rest of the Scottish Labour 40 are just snouts in trough leeches, who do nothing for Scotland

  67. 67
    Hang The Bastards says:


    Let the Bong-Eyed-Mental-Deluded-Lying-Bastard-Son-of-a-Manse speak !

    We all need a good laugh !!

  68. 68
    sporran bollocks says:

    I believe the adjective is “scotch”

  69. 69
    MrAngry61 says:

    Gordon Brown presuming to speak in the Budget debate is akin to a punchbag trying to throw the first blow.

  70. 70
    Larry Grayson says:

    and a revolver!

  71. 71
    I hate Tesco AND the Pope says:

    Seriously brilliant, Bill Q, MP.

  72. 72
    I hate Tesco AND the Pope says:

    Er, he’s an expert on courage, isn’t he? Isn’t he?

  73. 73
    Johny Ronan says:

    (cur | prev) 16:59, 13 March 2011 (talk) (3,036 bytes) (undo)
    Revision for all those who are interested

  74. 74
    I hate Blue Labour says:

    Told you so.

    So, where was he?

    Stripped of power, his spineless cowardice is laid bare for all to see.

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