March 9th, 2011

Cameron’s Contraband Plan

Former smoker David Cameron and current smokers Nick Clegg, Simon Burns, Steve Hilton etc are outlawing tobacco advertising. Do as they say, not as they do. Leaving aside the obvious risk that cutting off thousands of small shops at the knees poses, just as with prohibition and drugs, the evidence suggests that forcing vices underground increases the attraction. An “enemy of enterprise” and a purveyor of forbidden fruits in one easy piece of legislation.


158 Comments

  1. 1
    Southern Softy says:

    What a fag!

  2. 2
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    What happened to the free market?

    Bad one Dave you knob!

  3. 3
    The people says:

    As with most silly ideas, it originated from the EU.

    What are France, Spain, Greece, etc doing about this? That’s rght – f*ck all.

  4. 4
    Spot on says:

    Pipe smokers live longer than non-smokers!
    (Thereby also proving that there is no danger from passive smoking.)

  5. 5
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    and besides , what about revenue that the goverment gets from the obsence tax on Fags? Surely in thease times we need \all the income as possible(Without raising anymore taxes) , if the tax revenue falls what then?

  6. 6
    The people says:

    “In 2003, it was reported that sales of cigarette cases had surged, attributable to the introduction of more prominent warning labels on cigarette packs by an EU directive in January 2003. Alternatively, people choose to hide the warnings using various funny stickers, such as “You could be hit by a bus tomorrow.”

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tobacco_packaging_warning_messages#European_Union

  7. 7
    Dick the Prick says:

    Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

  8. 8
    Yawn says:

    Hey Dweebo, all those stupid advertising videos are really slowing down the site.

  9. 9
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I like choirboys, Barbara Streisand, wanking off to photos of Des O’connor, mincing down Old Compton St. in a thong and getting rogered by mutiple male partners. Does this mean I’m gay?

  10. 10
    NannyState says:

    Psssst want some shag?

  11. 11

    Tough on Smoking, Tough On the Causes of Smoking?

  12. 12
    Anonymous says:

    “Do as they say, not as they do.”

    They are advertising tobacco?

  13. 13
    A Smoker says:

    Hurrah, cheaper fags (albeit illegal ones).

  14. 14
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Tax aviodence is your duty!

  15. 15
    Voice of Treason says:

    I thought Cameron was going to get rid of the nanny state but he’s just as bad as New Labour. In fact I’m getting really pissed off with this government and especially the twat-faced Cameron and his treacherous sidekick Clegg. They talk tough but are as limp-wristed as a fractured arm faggot.

  16. 16
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    “We’ll roll back the Nanny state”

    Meet Blue Labour just like the old Labour, why not trust the people to make a decision over if they want or not want to smoke?

    It started with the enforcement of seatbelts and it’s continuing now, someone needs to have a closer look at ASH and it’s lobbying power, f’ing commies.

  17. 17
  18. 18
    EU, prisoner votes, bailouts, nannying, muzzies, corrupt non-resigning MPs & me? No thanks. says:

    Too right.

    “Democracy for the Libyans” but not for the overwhelming majority of the UK who wish to wrest control of the UK back from Europe eh? You morally vacuous and poisonously dogmatic dictator.

    When is the referendum Dave you fucking wanker?

    Remember when you wrote this in the Sun?

    – – –

    ‘Labour promised vote on EU’ ……… By DAVID CAMERON
    Writing exclusively for The Sun ………………..28 Aug 2007

    “I’VE got a couple of simple questions for Gordon Brown.

    What makes you think you can break your promises to the British people?

    And what makes you think you can change the way our country is governed without asking the British people first?

    There’s a simple answer to both questions: Arrogance.

    And when it comes to Europe, arrogance is what we’ve seen from Labour time and time again.

    It’s the arrogance that says: “We, the powerful elites, know best” “

    – – –

    You have the power to make the required changes. You will not exercise that power.

    It’s the arrogance that says: “We, the powerful elites, know best”

    It certainly is the arrogance. It goes further when you are now in a position to do something about it and refuse to do so.

    You are a fra~ud. Hell is too nice a place for you.

  19. 19
    DisgustedOfTunbridgeWells says:

    The Government will find something else to make up for any lost revenue, how about tax avoidance?, what a hope.

  20. 20
    Giles says:

    Really? Stopping people smoking is an enemy of enterprise? I wouldn’t have thought paying £5 for a box of tobacco and then setting fire to it (damaging your health in the meantime) is a constructive use of wealth.

    Changing the packaging is hardly prohibition either.

    By any chance are you a smoker?

  21. 21
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    We did win the 2nd world war , right?

  22. 22
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    That’s a few more votes for UKIP.

    And for Dave’s next election-losing trick……..

  23. 23
    DisgustedOfTunbridgeWells says:

    Just saw your #12 post Billy, stopping tax avoidance seems a favourite.

  24. 24
    Engineer says:

    So far as I’m aware, it isn’t illegal to grow tobacco plants in your garden. I’ve no idea if the resulting crop is palatable, but it might be worth someone’s while to give it a try. No tax, just a bit of effort.

  25. 25
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    Yeah I watched and learnt so my Chinese fixer is sending over 10 shipments only Bensons though is that ok?
    :)

  26. 26
    /\ /\ /\ says:

    The previous comment was sponsored by ASH in cooperation with the EU.

  27. 27
    Scurfy says:

    No, it means you are (a) Tony Blair and (b) trolling the sainted Billy.

  28. 28
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    I believe France stopped advertising tobacco well before the UK (certainly did for some types.)

    Mainly because of the assertion that advertising doesn’t make people smoke more, it makes them change brands. Which at the time meant “stick with french brands”.

  29. 29
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    It does make you wonder if some of these “conspiracy theorists” are correct sometimes.

  30. 30
    Scurfy says:

    Yes, fuck off, Giles, and mind your own business. I gave up smoking years ago but that’s my preference, not yours, you arse.

  31. 31
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    More EU inspired Liberal Fascism from rusty Dave.

    The sooner this Coalition is destroyed at the ballot box the better.

    At least with Labour we know that we are utterly fucked rather than the deceit & fraud of this duplicitous bunch of lying shysters.

    Continuity Blue Labour OUT!

  32. 32
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    I believe its not possible to grow palatable tobacco north of … Greece.

  33. 33
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    +1

  34. 34
    Scurfy says:

    Too chilly hereabouts, sir, as I understand. Growing plants in one’s loft is apparently more profitable, as long as you pirate the leccy from next door or the lamp-post in the street.

  35. 35
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    Spoken like a true libtard fascist.

  36. 36
    The Sheikh Of Arabeeee says:

    …and meanwhile cigarette counterfeiting gangs in the Balkans are cumming in their pants at the thought of how much money they’ll save and how easy it will be to replicate these non-branded packets.

  37. 37
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    Plus One

  38. 38
    Scurfy says:

    Bookmark Dick Puddlecote, I say:

    http://dickpuddlecote.blogspot.com/

  39. 39
    Twatspotter says:

    Your comment means that you are a cerebrally-challenged name thief and all-round wazzock. May the fleas of a thousand rats infest your arsehole, and may your arms be too short to scratch.

  40. 40
    Yawn says:

    Fuck off you Huntish drone.

  41. 41
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Roll on PMQ’s

    And it’s goodbye from William Hague,I understand that Ed Miliband will put the boot in today.

  42. 42
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    Indeed

  43. 43
    Yawn says:

    Wrong, the Gews won WW2

  44. 44
    The people says:

    it’s possible to have security measures such as holograms etc. that aren’t advertising?

  45. 45
    lola says:

    Even better – want some rough shag?

  46. 46
    Pete says:

    but you still got fooled again…

  47. 47
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    The country is awash with bootleg tobacco full of Cadmium, Arsenic and God knows what else, which ARE dangers to passive smokers, so what does the Muscular Liberal do? Allow the bootleggers a greater opportunity to increase market advantage. I suggest the title of Maximum Imbecile has found a new owner. BTW, I’m a non-smoker.
    This act of pygmy-brained prejudice against the legal pastime of tobacco usage should put paid to any lingering doubt that Camoran (sic) is a Tory. The sooner the Party defenestrates him, the better.

  48. 48
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Yeah, but the chances of cancer in the mouth are increased.

  49. 49
    TOBACCO GROWER says:

    I GROW MY OWN TOBACCO HERE IN GB AND IT’S EASY!
    If you can grow tomatoes, you can grow tobacco.
    Plenty of info on the net and the seeds are really cheap.

  50. 50
    DisgustedOfTunbridgeWells says:

    You forgot Global Warming, soon we will be able to grow our own.

  51. 51
    @Kilkeal says:

    Surely there are more important things to do, or is everything running so smoothly, the coalition (should I put conservative led?) is looking round for things interfere with. Which legislation is being repealed to make room for this advancement in society. Here in Ireland cigarettes are no longer displayed and sold from a cabinet, smoking in young people has increased.

  52. 52
    TOBACCO GROWER says:

    Wrong. You can grow tobacco outdoors in GB just like tomatoes.

  53. 53
    Scurfy says:

    How do you counterfeit a cigarette? When I was a kid the sweet-shop stocked vile sugar cigarettes with one end painted red to make it look as if it was on fire. They were not only counterfeit but a triumph of capitalism — training us to smoke, rotting our teeth and giving us diabetes, all of which contributed to GDP. Genius or what?

  54. 54
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Fags in Greece are around 3e a packet of 20/25. Is a packet of fags over £6 in the UK now?

  55. 55
    Family Rothschild says:

    We were the real winners.

  56. 56
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    “I understand that Ed Miliband will put the boot in today”

    Probably still got his fathers Red Army boots under his bed.

    But still, the very disappointing turncoat & traitor William Hague deserves to be mauled.

  57. 57
    TOBACCO GROWER says:

    You are wrong. Tobacco can be grown very easily in GB just like tomatoes. In fact it was encouraged and considered a patriotic thing to do during the war.

  58. 58
    Herodian says:

    I’d never have believed that the fagging system went on beyond Eton until I saw Clegg mincing around Cameron.

  59. 59
  60. 60
    Scurfy says:

    I stand corrected and will check this out. I have destroyed my lawn in order to grow veg and may set aside a plot. Then I will cure the leaves and roll them into fags which I will leave on my little glut-table outside the gate with a “Help Yourself” sign.

  61. 61
    Cheech & Chong says:

    Hi, I’m Robert Zimmerman.
    I used to smoke ’bout 20 packs of cigarettes a day.
    Till they took away one of m’lungs.
    Cut ma smokin’ in half.

  62. 62
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    first they came for my freedom to chose my smokes, i said nothing…..

  63. 63
    Righty Right Wing (Mrs) says:

    GOM,

    Not going to happen.

    I left the party because of the infestation of EU liberal fascism & Heathite treason that Cameron & his clan espouses. Only now is the mask dropping & the true nature of “call me Dave” known.

    The Cameroons have already sealed the fate of & the destruction of the Conservative Party.

    Sooner the better for me now – all the more for UKIP.

  64. 64
    Sres says:

    You don’t just walk into a shop and while scouring the counter for your favourite choc bar think, hmm, you know what I’ll have 20 benson and hedges instead.

    Smoking is peer pressure from those kids who sneak their parents cigs, yet again parents are to blame and not cornershops, the evil purveyor.

  65. 65
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Yep!

  66. 66
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    32 + 56 are not incompatible. Have you ever smoked a gauloise?

  67. 67
    Sres says:

    Tomacco!

  68. 68
    Scurfy says:

    +++ ANTI-SEMITE ALERT +++

    Fuckwits.

  69. 69
    Sres says:

    You are hugh fearnley whittingstall and I claim my battery caged chicken dinner!

  70. 70
    Fa Kin Su Pah says:

    So the frenzied nannying and law making
    continues. We are under a dictatorship
    of health nazis who are determined to do us good.

  71. 71
    Sres says:

    Mithter sthpeeker mithter sthpeeker…

    Can’t take someone like him seriously.

    I’m surprised he knows what’s going on anyway…

    http://www.crashbangwallace.com/2011/03/08/exclusive-ed-miliband-told-bbc-he-knew-nothing-about-tunisia/

  72. 72
    Stepney says:

    P&O ferry sales to increase 200%.

    Convoys of white vans hurtling through Kent.

    Best place to buy fags is Belgium – cheap as chips and although the seat of EU bullyboys, freely available in lovely branded boxes of 1000.

    I go twice a year to stock up and never have to go to the newsagents round the corner. My baccy tax ends up paying for Belgian nurses.

    And will continue to do so.

    Used to be to piss off Gordon. Now it’s Dave’s turn.

    Leave me alone.

  73. 73
    Sres says:

    Be quiet and eat your greens and breathless for the environment you CO2 factory you.

  74. 74
    Engineer says:

    Is it part of the Big Society if people grow their own?

  75. 75
    Her Majesty's Foreign Office says:

    would you care to join? you sound just the type.

    PS if you fail the SAS is your best bet.

  76. 76
    Engineer says:

    Doctor – “If you don’t smoke, don’t touch alcohol, don’t play about with women and eat healthily, you’ll live to be 100.”

    Me – “Why would I want to?”

  77. 77
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    How do you counterfeit a cigarette?

    you make a shite cigarette out of any old crap tobacco, perhaps add some Tea and a few random chemicals to make it smell right. Shove in nicely printed packet.

  78. 78
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    Thanks for the link, I’m sick of all these “we know best” clearings in the woods just leave me alone to go about my daily day.

    On a tangent, do you know how long it took the Police to come over after I slapped a chav for throwing a stone at my windscreen? 3 days! god knows what it’ll be like when the Labour fan boys and girls start loosing their jobs.

  79. 79
    The people says:

    Suspect Billy doesn’t give a shit, tbh. He is strangely detached at the mo – wonder why?

  80. 80
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    The Russians won it really, as much as I despise Socialism in all it’s guises they did a job.

  81. 81
    briansj3 says:

    no. anti-banker alert. don’t confuse hating bankers for warmongering with religious prejudice.

  82. 82
    Anonymous says:

    I’m a great believer in the “you could be hit by a bus tomorrow” argument (as per The People’s posting in number 6).

    There’s one risk statistic that people don’t mention much, which is this:

    Everybody on the planet has a 100% chance of dying no matter what they do.

    So, I’ll live my life in a way that I’ll enjoy it thank you very much, because I’m only here once, and I’d rather have a shortish enjoyable/fulfilled life than a long boring pointless life.

    I might give up smoking one day, but if/when I do, I’m not going to spend my time lecturing other people who smoke; everybody knows the risks.

    I don’t see pictures of clogged arteries on packets of butter, or pictures of broken spinal cords on skiiing brochures, but they’re still relevant risks.

    I wish the government would stop putting us in the “naughty corner” like children – I’m a grown-up for fuck’s sake, I can make my own choices; so fuck off and leave me alone.

  83. 83
    Anonymous says:

    The Labour party has lodged a formal complaint to the BBC amid a growing political row over how the corporation covers the Coalition’s deficit reduction policies.

    Officials complained that a BBC London News report concerning NHS budgets used the word “savings” instead of “cuts”.

    HaHaHa

  84. 84
    Gordon Brown stinks of shit says:

    PMQ’s better be entertaining today. It’s been fucking dull the last few weeks.

  85. 85
    The people says:

    Well, ‘won’ as in the biggest contribution, yes. Ironically, the 2 countries to prosper after the war were Germany and Japan.

    BTW – the USSR was a fascist state.

  86. 86
    TOBACCO GROWER says:

    Less than by drinking alcohol.

  87. 87
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    +1

  88. 88
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Its takes two to tango, Need a decent oppo to make it fun.

  89. 89
    ... says:

    ^^^ zi onjanist alert

  90. 90
    labour make me puke says:

    If you want to be sick tune into the Daily Politics and look at Caroline Flint. What a vile bitch, spin and one liners are her speciality. Tell us about what labours cuts policy is. What’s that, nothing to say?

  91. 91
    Walter Raleigh says:

    IIRC, by law you’re legally liable to pay duty on home grown tobacco even if it’s only for personal consumption. Not that they’re likely to make a court case out of it at the moment, but in a few years time…

  92. 92
    Engineer says:

    You can spot ‘em a mile off. They’re the ones with red smoke.

  93. 93
    Mike Hunt says:

    mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

  94. 94
    ... says:

    Where Bolshevik gews committed a holocaust of 22 million.

  95. 95
    'the muscles from Sheffield' Nick Clegg says:

    you calling me a fag? fair enough.

  96. 96
    Gordon Brown stinks of shit says:

    Short skirt or I’m not watching her.

  97. 97
    The people says:

    Labour planned £14bn of cuts, the coalition has planned £16bn of cuts. Er, what’s the massive difference?

    Both are easily achievable without affecting services, and neither is enough. What’s the big deal?

  98. 98
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    Yep smoked one Marlborough “Light” from a I use the term loosely from a 20 pack purchased at a bazaar in Basra a few years back.

    Took one drag and quit smoking soon after, I’m sure that’s where Saddams wmd have been turned into it was vile and I didn’t have to put up with ASH telling me that I should stop, I thank the man sitting in the van sliding “tobacco” into a hollow cigarette for that.

  99. 99
    Smoker in Crete says:

    Wrong!
    20 Marlboro now cost 4 Euros! The price going up from 3.75 following the recent tax increase.

  100. 100
    Billy's bofriend has a cissy fit says:

    Ooh get her!

  101. 101
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Guido, Should you start a “Is dave Bonkers” thread/tag?

  102. 102
    The people says:

    he’s not from Sheffield, as is patently obvious

  103. 103
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    +1

  104. 104
    labour make me puke says:

    Caroline is struggling, waffle, waffle, waffle, no answers. Useless.

  105. 105
    IS BILLY BOWDEN BONKERS? says:

    Poor old Billy hasn’t got a clue how things work round here.

  106. 106
    Gordon Brown stinks of shit says:

    Enjoying watching Brillo grilling Caroline Flint on Daily Politics over Labour’s total lack of policy on Libya. She’s a total fucking c unt.

  107. 107
    Gordon Brown stinks of shit says:

    But I bet she gives great head.

  108. 108
    Number 10's Cat says:

    No but I’ve been about a mile downwind of one, and that was bad enough.

  109. 109
    Anonymous says:

    then pay to use the site and they can get rid of the ads….

  110. 110
    tell it like it really is says:

    Family squabble then between the labour party and labours own publicity broadcasting corporation which the public are forced to fund.

  111. 111
    Dick the Prick says:

    Not really on this one as Dick Puddlecote has been charting this progress. Just depressed but typically so.

  112. 112
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Really?

    You may not be old enough to remember that cigarettes used to be advertised on the TV. They were very trendy back then and everyone was encouraged to smoke because it made you a better person.

    Don’t blame the parents – they didn’t know any different then – just get your facts right!

  113. 113
    streamfisher says:

    Well if you cant join them beat them, get the baccy growing plot sorted out and have a trawl online for a spirits still, that’s £5,000 a year saved in taxes already.

  114. 114
    Wayne And Waynetta's Sugar Daddy says:

    2nd most expensive in the world, and people are buying contraband, wow what a shocker.

    I’m fortunate that I travel abroad a lot with work so haven’t bought uk cigs for a while, so keep raising the taxes and watch revenue continue to decline stupid idiots.

  115. 115
    AC1 says:

    Dear Tat,
    Just wondering where your promised blog is?

    Give my love to your therapist.

  116. 116
    Olive Oyl says:

    Who eats butter? It’s BAD for you, FFS!

  117. 117
  118. 118
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Nice one. Let’s hope someone at the Beeb knows which side their bread’s buttered.

    Labour is so last week.

  119. 119
    Hic! says:

    Make your own beer and wine. Parsnip wine is like rocket fuel. Woo hoo!

  120. 120
    Anonymous says:

    Or give up smoking and drinking.

  121. 121
    AC1 says:

    Just fuck off will ya?

  122. 122
    Gordon Brown stinks of shit says:

    Harman has a very punchable face.

  123. 123
    TOBACCO GROWER says:

    Bullshit.
    You can do what you want for your own use because a leaf only becomes smokeable tobacco when shredded, until then it’s compost.
    Don’t worry about Nanny, she knows when she’s licked.

  124. 124
    streamfisher says:

    Never, don’t let the B… grind you down.

  125. 125
    AC1 says:

    First?

    They started meddling with salt and fat in food (probably because they know you’ll eat more to compensate). Just look what a disaster the “food pyramid” is.

  126. 126
    Gordon Brown stinks of shit says:

    I thought Cameron did pretty well today. Red was quite shit. I just noticed Claire Perry stand up. If Grumpy chooses her to ask a question, the reaction should be hilarious.

  127. 127
    AC1 says:

    Smoking does make you a better person. Just look at those who want to ban it.

  128. 128
    oddly helpful says:

    Get an ad blocker for your browser. Or try disabling Flash animation in your Preferences window. A full refund is available on the usual terms.

  129. 129
    Anonymous says:

    There’s advertising and ADVERTISING, get real. 10+ vids and animations running will loose him readers.

  130. 130
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    Sobranie Balkan for me chaps!

  131. 131
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    “You’re never alone with a Strand”. Cough, crash.

  132. 132
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    …or in the case of Camel cigarettes, it doesn’t matter. They taste like shite. Never had a fag like it and hope I never do again.

  133. 133
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Nice.

  134. 134
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Well I just bought a packet yesterday.

  135. 135
    labour make me puke says:

    Vile, hypocritical woman

  136. 136
    labour make me puke says:

    I am afraid Ed Sillyband just does not cut it.

  137. 137
    labour make me puke says:

    How very true.

  138. 138
    labour make me puke says:

    Do you mean Ed.

  139. 139
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    When I was at school in the 70’s I could buy 5 Woodbines for the cost of my lunch money. It was the done thing then and we all smoked. Shops were very willing to sell them to us. We could buy them practically anywhere. No government guidelines then, which is why we’re where we are today.

  140. 140
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    Why not distill it, put it in your fuel tank and save on fuel while you’re at it.

    If I could just suss out immortality, I could save on Inheritance Tax/ Death Duties as well.

  141. 141
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    She could be first, in a very long line of many.

  142. 142
    Ampers says:

    It’s a servant to a senior boy at public school.

    And how can you identify these moves as the same as prohibition? Are you saying that, in America, shops could sell booze in a plain label, as long as the bottles weren’t visible over the counter?

    Of course you are, and of course this isn’t the case.

    I think you are beginning to do a Hague with us – losing interest?

    BTW Anyone remember the Haig whisky add from the fifties? “Don’t be Vague, ask for Haig”|?

  143. 143
    @Kilkeal says:

    You don’t really live longer, it just seems longer!

  144. 144
    Progressive says:

    Argument is that blank packets will not encourage yoof to take up smoking. Apparently they like the pink and multi coloured flashy packets and this encourages them to smoke.

    True or false? Maybe Gadaffi Jnr. produced some thesis about this at the Libya School of Economics in London?

  145. 145
    Mjolinir says:

    Some years ago I managed a ‘Sweets, News, Cigs’ shop -One of the great ‘stop smoking’ campaigns got under way, and the lobbies – as always – said ‘It Doesn’t Go Far Enough’

    Someone in the trade press suggested that the “UK Tobacco Companies” call a press conference and announce –

    //We can no longer resist the allegations of the harm our products cause. All of our manufacturing and marketing is being closed down. As I speak, the Boards of all our member Companies are meeting to initiate winding up process, and all our employees are being told of their immediate dismissal.

    UK Government has been informed that it will receive NO MORE Tobacco Duty.

    Thank you, Ladies & Gents. Good Morning.

  146. 146
    jheath says:

    Has this wretched government nothing better to do? Even social democrat Helmut Schmidt is still smoking like a good ‘un at 90 odd, and talking sense on global warming and the IPCC. But you get no sense from our younger elite politicians.

  147. 147
    helpful serf says:

    You mean ‘ yunger elite Laber ejekatid politishuns’.

  148. 148
    Demon says:

    +1

  149. 149
    Voice of Treason says:

    Wonderful to watch Caroline Flint make mincemeat of the fawning Francis Maude today. To see Maude backtracking and getting himself in tight corner because twat-faced Cameron has become all nanny state and hot flushes was a hoot. Fooking Maude was obviously getting angry at having to adopt one of New Labour’s policies.

    There is little difference between Cameron and New Labour. Let’s hope UKIP can provide a platform of sanity in the future.

  150. 150
    The Sheikh Of Arabeeee says:

    I keep getting letters from Nice-But-Thick-As-A-Nappy-Butty Warsi asking me to donate.

    No.

    Fuck off.

    Get rid of that shiny-foreheaded fucking lying fucking fucking Social Democrat fucking twat CMD and get somebody with a pair of balls to lead you. Ditch the fucking stupid nanny state policies- of which this is a prime fucking example and confirms that Lansley is a fucking spineless, brainless fucking cowardly prick who’s let the fucking Common Purpose dickwads at the Ministry and Arnott wearing a big strap-on gang ream his gaping enlarged-by-prefects-at-Brentwood fucking arsehole.

    Then you might get some support, and my vote, again.

    I want my country back you bastards.

  151. 151
    Voice of Treason says:

    So has Cameron!

  152. 152
    Voice of Treason says:

    So, there will be no ciggys on display but they will be able to display a price list of all the ciggys available. They really are a bunch of half-wits and Cameron with his sidekick treacherous Clegg, the biggest half-wit of them all.

  153. 153
    Socialism has murdered 150 million human beings pride says:

    Time for the tobacco companies to tell Cameron to fuck off.

    They need to tell the country that “law” has now passed into tyranny and they will not obey. They have profits enough to start a campaign calling on the 13 million smokers to put their votes behind any party that will stop the nannying . UKIP seems a good choice since the main three are shite. Brazen defiance will put the state on the defensive. They will have to close the tobacco industry down by force in Pol Pot-style and even if they succeed they will 1-look like the scum they are and 2-lose billions in tobacco tax that they take while spitting in smokers faces. Plus, if enough smokers get pissed off they might just hit the streets Egypt-like.
    Bad news for Cameron, Lawnsley, Clegg AND for the Labour twats as well.

  154. 154
    The Golem says:

    Certainly true, although apart from having a greenhouse, the secret of success has to be in the curing.

  155. 155
    Jabba the Cat says:

  156. 156
    TOBACCO GROWER says:

    Yup, you need to be very patient with the curing and never let the stuff get more humid than 70%RH or it’ll mould.
    For pipe or rollups you can also flavour it with drinks like Rum or Port etc.etc.
    If it’s a bit harsh, you can toast it with a sugarwater coating to caramelise it.

  157. 157
    Anonymous says:

    Idiots!
    Just wait for AV and then we can get some UKIP MPs who will represent us!

  158. 158
    Stevie says:

    Oxygen is poisonous! EVERYONE who breathes this substance will die one day. I am perfectly well aware of the risks of the baccy – I just dont give a fucking fuck. They are my lungs so just fuck the fucking fuck off and leave me alone. Ive just about had enough of these two faced,thieving. EU cocksuckers telling me how to live my life. I want to emigrate to 1956 – or failing that – bring on the revolution.Time for a fag and a look at the UKIP website….


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George Galloway says of his former Respect candidate the UKIP MEP turned Tory, Amjad Bashir…

“Clearly Bashir does not have any real political principles or commitment, only naked opportunism and self-interest. He represents the revolving door principle in politics. The Tories are welcome to him because he will cause them embarrassment. Fortunately Respect was able to act before he did it to us.”


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