January 20th, 2011

Balls’ SpAd Outed Alan Johnson’s “Personal Reasons”

Alan Johnson’s suspected affair with a civil servant was widely rumoured around Westminster, it was the reason that people believed that he had not run for leader. The story was never stood up by the papers.

This evening Guido sources are pointing the finger at Alex Belardinelli, Special Adviser to Ed Balls, as the person who has been making inquiries into Alan Johnson’s private life. Shadow Cabinet sources say they believe the Sunday Times has the story and Ed Miliband himself believes that Ed Balls’ people have had a hand in the story getting out. Balls chose his moment well, a series of gaffes by Alan Johnson had left him politically weakened.  Yet still Miliband rewarded him with the prize he craved…

UPDATE 22 Jan : Lots of people in the comments saying this story is proven duff by the Mail’s story about the wife and the copper. Don’t be so sure – they’re not mutually exclusive stories…


  1. 1
    SOM says:

    Maybe we can rid of Balls now too. A 2 for 1 job lot. What an utterly loathsome front bench labour have.

  2. 2
    Mike Litorus says:

    Ferrets! Nice to see Balls reverting to form though, should help keep the treacherous dogs out for longer. Only downside is the bunch of monkeys that are currently in there…

  3. 3
    Oh dear says:

    If Balls’ fingerprints are seen as all over it already he has only diminished himself.

    Tottywatch- Did Johnson do well for himself?

  4. 4
    Robert Catesby says:

    “Alan Johnson’s suspected affair with a civil servant was widely rumoured around Westminster”

    If it was widely rumoured, then why wasn’t Guido sharing the rumours with the co-conspirators?

  5. 5
    13eastie says:

    No-one had the balls to unseat Brown, though.

    What can we conclude about Red Ed’s grip?

  6. 6
    Koba says:

    Is the affair with a man or woman?

  7. 7
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Jesus Christ. If this is true, Balls is even worse than we thought.

    Shadow Chancellor career: dead on day 1.

  8. 8
    Johan says:

    Well played Balls.

    Those who dislike him won’t dislike him any more as a result of this, and Labour tribalists will see him as the man to hammer Osbourne and destroy the myth of deficit reduction being necessary. They won’t give a damn about how he got the role or what that says about the kind of man he is.

  9. 9
    Pig Sick says:

    Tracy Temple?

  10. 10
    fonyblair says:

    I’m sure I heard Balls say he would never brief against anyone the other day.

    If I had a 3D TV I’m sure his nose would have headed straight towards me!

  11. 11
    Tessa Tickles says:


  12. 12
    Nick Jones says:

    Christmas has come early for the Tories!

  13. 13

    Would have been better if Balls rather Wee Dougie Alexander was Shadow Foreign Secretary.

  14. 14
    John says:

    Not likely: Balls would have done it earlier.

  15. 15

    What else would you expect from a low life bastard like ball’s
    you would think that Ed ReallyBland would have avoided balls like the fucking plague
    wait till he starts digging into your background ed !
    Old Labour -Smears is wot we do best !

  16. 16
    Dick Scratcher says:

    1. So that’s where the postman was emptying his sack…

    2. Did she get a special delivery in her slot?

    3. How often did he clear out her box?

    Take yer pick.

  17. 17
    SOM says:

    Christ if this pans out direly like i think it will and Labours front bench destroys itself, then Cameron could go for an election quicker than we think.

  18. 18
    Johnny Tentpole says:

    But he didn’t brief, it was his special friend wot did it.

  19. 19
    Tessa Tickles says:

    It would be better if you fucked-off to Iran or Saudi Arabia.

    Planes leaves throughout the day. Thanks for visiting us. Bye.

  20. 20

    And I still have the Baby P memo. Come on Balls, go for leader.


  21. 21
    Anonymous says:

    Wonderful stuff Guido !!

    Thought Alan Johnson would have been squirming at being used as cover by David Cameron on the changes to the NHS !!

    But who is the civil servant ??

  22. 22
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Yvette Cooper?

  23. 23
    Local Scouser Luciana Berger says:

    I’d like to point out that I am not having an affair with Alan Johnston. I’ve heard rumours that “He’s fucking Useless” and it’s not true.

  24. 24
    Ed Balls says:

    I admire Alan so much. He was one of Britain’s greatest politicians. I love Alan. Alan, you’re the best in my swivelling eyes.

    So, a new era begins. I will have MY hands at the controls. I will have the POWER. This time I can reduce the private sector to 0% of the economy. Muhahahahahaha. Come Yvette! Come ride with me to our land of pure bullshit and hypocrisy. We are the chosen ones!!!!!!

  25. 25
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Did he ring her bell?

  26. 26
    Anonymous says:

    And it buys a few days to give South Gloucestershire council a bollocking of the first degree so that they can organise some respite care for Celyn’s mum..

    Ah, Government by Mumsnet – live by it, die by it…

  27. 27

    How often did he lick the flap’s of her her envelope ?

  28. 28
    Johnny Tentpole says:

    I trust you have the courage of your convictions.

  29. 29
    Furious says:

    Always knew balls was a nasty little shit.

  30. 30
    Anonymous says:

    So why did the blog that likes boast that you’re either in front, or you’re behind, not pick up the gossip first?

  31. 31

    s se sorry for the st st stutter

  32. 32
    Tessa Tickles says:


  33. 33
    Bazza says:

    Oh he’s a class act is Blinky. No conscience, no worries.

    “So what!”

  34. 34
    It doesn't add up... says:

    The Naked Civil Servant?

  35. 35
    ciasmaninlondon says:

    No let him off Bollocks.

  36. 36
    QWERTY says:

    Um I think you will find Guido was predicting Johnson would be the first to go a while back.

  37. 37
    Peter MangledBum (Lord of the Rings) says:

    I thought he had resigned because he was still sorting out the male

  38. 38
    Baroness Warsi of Dewsbury in the county of West Yorkshire says:

    What have i been saying about bigots like you?

  39. 39
    MB. says:

    If that’s true then Red Ed had better watch his back because Balls will be after his job next or perhaps he already has something which is why he got the Shadow Chancellor job?

  40. 40
    QWERTY says:

    We don’t know who Alan Johnson is shagging but we do know he’s just taken one up the anus from Gordon McBrown.

  41. 41
    Andrew says:

    Goodness me, what a hideous, disgraceful comment. I can’t see that there was any irony or humour intended, and I hope I missed something, but if you’re being straight-faced Tessa, then you should hang your head in shame.

  42. 42
    Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

    Ok, let’s start on dismantling Balls…

    See here – By Robert Winnett, Deputy Political Editor 12:01AM GMT 19 Dec 2007


    “The Northern Rock crisis is threatening to cost every taxpayer up to £1,800, as it emerged Gordon Brown was warned a year ago that “urgent action” was needed to prevent a banking meltdown.”

    “In a further development, the governor of the Bank of England, Mervyn King, revealed that the Prime Minister had been informed that Britain was uniquely vulnerable to a run on a bank.”

    “Mr King told MPs that Ed Balls, one of Mr Brown’s closest colleagues, was part of a top-level Whitehall group warned last year that “urgent action” was needed to deal with the potential future collapse of a retail bank.”

    Ed ‘so what’ Balls was told and he didn’t listen. No more boom and bust eh?

  43. 43
    You gov says:


  44. 44
    Camoron pissing himself laughing says:

    Yeah, but.. shame you’re in opposition (does it suck, Eddie?) and, because of you, Labour are going to stay there. No ifs or buts, Labour are fucked.

  45. 45
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    Oh, I don’t know. Next PMQs Cameron comes out with a line that “the new Shadow Chancellor is only doing the job because of his mastery of the dark arts of spin and back-stabbing” should raise a cheer from the Tories, and be uncomfortable for Edth. Get the story of spin front and centre, and Balls will always be defending himself.

  46. 46
    ciasmaninlondon says:

    Come on Guido, who’s knocking off Yvette. That fat poof bollocks can’t get it up females anymore. prefers Broons rear.

  47. 47
    Serpico says:

    If you have it why don’t you release it into the public domain? You’ve been banging on about it for 2 years now, this is as far as balls is going to get in the Labour Party.

  48. 48
    Lady Macbeth says:

    Miliband’s screwed now. Labour tore themselves apart in government with backstabbings and undermining each other. Presumably Balls will do Miliband in too when the time is right.

    Balls is definitely the heir to Gordon “Macbeth” Brown.

  49. 49
    Dack Blog says:

    Crikey. A cheated politician’s wife actually leaves? Is that a first?

  50. 50
    Scallywag says:

    Check out http://www.order-order.com for the truth…

  51. 51
    Lord Mangleddbum's wrecked ringpiece says:

    No comment.

  52. 52
    Dack Blog says:

    politician’s cheated on wife, rather…

  53. 53
    Johnny Tentpole says:

    People will have forgotten who Baby P is by the time it comes out.

  54. 54
    Fiona Bruce's Most Hostile Constituent says:

    I feel like breaking out into, “Morning has broken”

  55. 55
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Rumour has it Balls has definitive proof that Ed Miliband’s a moron.

  56. 56
    Lady Macbeth says:

    Gagging for it

  57. 57
    Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

    Even now the Fleet Street hacks are banging out 1200 words on the ‘Death of New Labour’ for tomorrow.

    And they’d be right.

  58. 58
    Serpico says:

    This stinks of another Guido/Hague/Smoking Gun affair.

  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    Especially as it was being trailed on Politicalbetting.com, with a whole thread last week written by someone called ‘Chilon’ speculating about Johnson’s imminent departure in the manner of Estelle Morris. Was this all part of the plot?

  60. 60
    gildedtumbril says:

    …Or the No.10 cat. Or did bliar have it put down? Bastards.
    What a choice.That bunch of odious bastards or the brokeback coalition, conceived in perversion and swaddled in corruption.
    650 traitorous bastards. And, I doubt there is a British manufacturer of pianowire extant. I suppose hemp rope will have to suffice.

  61. 61
    retardEd Miliband says:

    Don’t worry – we’re a new generation.

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    I’m surprised there is still a Sunday Times

  63. 63
    Shire Tory says:

    Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer!
    None of that lot could manage their way out of a moist paper bag.

  64. 64
    retardEd Miliband says:

    Oh, yeth.

  65. 65
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    Oh what a tangled web we weave …. diddly diddly de de de !!

  66. 66
    Norman Tebbit says:


  67. 67
    Tessa Tickles says:

    I’m just suggesting a “better” way of life.

    If Islam’s so great, what’s he doing here? Not exactly a vote of confidence in his faith, is it? (answer: no, it isn’t)

  68. 68
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    too much of a coincidence !
    the ugly bastard big Al Campbell turns up on tv
    scandal breaks Johnson resigns on the same day !

    Labour= more smears than Mandelsons duvet !

  69. 69
    Queensferry One Eye says:

    Appointing Balls demonstrates Albert Einstein’s belief: “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.

  70. 70
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    Egg Balls and Egg Milliband….. both likely to end up with something on their faces….. Sunday Times?? They are doomed….. doomed !!

  71. 71
    The Squeaker says:

    That’s a very good point you made there, I must ensure that no 3D broadcasts are made from Parliament

  72. 72
    Mike Hunt says:

    Balls (Ed) had him dobbed in? well fuck me, I am surprised.

  73. 73
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:


    Hopefully someone else will go before being pushed !!

  74. 74
    I don't get it says:

    Guido your story don’t make sense. Why would Red Ed give Bollocks Ed the Job if he has just shafted his deputy?

  75. 75
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Let me just add, Andrew the ignorant, if I may, your chauvinisticness, why should I hang my head in shame, when the utter filth that is London M*uslim wants women to wear burqas, not leave the house without being chaperoned by a male relative, doesn’t want me to drive, didn’t want me to go to school??

    And I should hang my head in shame? Fuck you.

  76. 76
    Mike Hunt says:

    It’s called his eyes.

  77. 77
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Utter tripe, you apologist hag.

    PS: Where’s your burqa? Whore.

  78. 78
  79. 79
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    he’s just had his back door smashed in by a pair of Ball’s!

  80. 80
    Time for a quiet puke.... says:


  81. 81
    Ed Bollox says:

    But not from me.

  82. 82
    Mike Hunt says:

    We are assuming here that the other party is Female..

  83. 83
    friendly hangman says:

    Set up a gallows and i’ll make the bastards dance. Short drop just enough for them to die a SLOW death in particular when the fire under the trap door slowly toasts their feet to a turn before they croak

  84. 84
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    two complete fucking retards in change of the labour party…couldn’t be funnier

  85. 85
    Durrrrrr! says:

    Wait a few days for the effect to trickle down the polls.

  86. 86
    Ed Bollox Says says:

    I had my fingers crossed behind my back all along, so ner-ner-ner-neeeeeer-ner.

    Did I get it right this time Gordon?

  87. 87
    Merv the Perv, BoE says:

    I suspect the comment was triggered by London Muslim’s incessant chuntering on about Islam and its alleged superiority.

  88. 88
    Jatrius says:

    No other choice.

  89. 89
    Eunuch Powell says:

    Balls up like all evil Shakespearian characters come to a bad end. He is the creator of his own downfall.

  90. 90
    Anonymous says:

    You really are a stupid c nut aren’t you.

  91. 91
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    Because Red Ed is a sandwich short of a full picnic, plus he’s still playing kindergarten politics. He didn’t know – nor could he believe – that Ed Balls would be so nasty.

  92. 92
    Common Dog says:

    Nowt wrong with saying the Muslims should go back whence they came from. They have made it abundantly clear that they HATE this country.

  93. 93
    Beware of the Dog says:

    Or human.

  94. 94
    Bob sCrowtum says:

    We wanted a man on the inside, so Ed will do what he’s told if he knows what’s good for him…

    Well as close to a man as we could get, bunch of nancy’s in Labour if you ask me…

  95. 95
    Anonymous says:

    Let’s not forget that Bliar has a date with destiny tomorrow

  96. 96
    Anonymous says:

    This is bollocks, I reckon. Who cares who Johnson is shagging?

  97. 97
    Mr Squeaker says:

    Put that fuckin phone down and get back to the sink, margarine legs.

  98. 98
    Reds Under The Bed says:

    Ed Balls & Charlie Whelan: 6
    Ed Miliband & Alan Johnson: 0

    This should be an open goal for the Conservative-led Government – with Cameron in Flashman mode and Osborne’s sneering grin.

    Can’t wait for next Treasury Questions – Osborne will squash the squinty oik.

  99. 99
    Anonymous says:

    …….opposite a whole host of side-show freaks on the government front bench.

  100. 100
    Aesop o'Sardis says:

    … keep your enemies closer!

  101. 101
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    Why the f*ck should taxpayers fund her life of luxury in the Palace of Westminster ?? Serve notice on the sl*pper to quit and take Grumpy with her !!

  102. 102
    Common Dog says:

    But Guido wrote ” Ed Miliband himself believes that Ed Balls’ people have had a hand in the story getting out”. Why would Red Ed promote a traitor to the Labour party to the position of his deputy?

  103. 103
    Mike Litorus says:

    Fuck that, wouldn’t it be quite a coup to get him out less than 24 hours after appointment?

  104. 104
    Dack Blog says:

    Ed’s been acknowledging ‘mistakes’ of late. He’s just said on Sky that he’s looking forward (!) to working with Balls – following the strategy that he and Johnson have set out.

    I’m getting the feeling that Ed knew this was coming and is warning Balls off. But if so why give Balls the post?

    Something more behind the scenes here I think. Beyond the obvious that Balls is a Brutus.

  105. 105
    Bob sCrowtum says:

    Because Ed is *my* bitch!

  106. 106
    Coalition Wet Nappies says:

    I agree, he’s gone ’cause he’s found out not an android like rest of ‘em

  107. 107
    jo stalin says:

    Game over.Conservative majority in 2014/5 50 seats.Ed Balls becomes senior lecturer in Peace studies, University of Bradford,shortly before its closure.

  108. 108
    Reds Under The Bed says:

    If that’s true (and I’m not sayings it’s not) we’ll need quite a different sort of Lady Macbeth than you, my dear. And I just don’t see little Yvette being right for the part.

    But you’re right about Miliboy being screwed – perhaps shafted would be better.

  109. 109
    jgm2 says:

    Aye. And not turning your back on him for a second. He had a go at getting rid of Darling but failed. And now he’s got what he wanted. You’d better hope his ambition stops there Miliband.

    It’s an absolute gift.

    Plus Postie will have had a few pals around the Labour Party. They’ll be watching for any slip-ups Ned or the missus might make to get their revenge.

    Ferrets in a sack time indeed.

    Still, at least Miliband got to write something on his blank sheet of paper. Three months into the job and he got to reshuffle his ‘top-team’.

    He’s going to need another blank sheet of paper for his policies now.

  110. 110
    Gordon says:

    Them’s my boys. Ed and Ed

  111. 111
    Joss Taskin says:

    Widders ?

  112. 112
    Kevin T says:

    Not sure about that, Balls’ ambitions go higher than chancellor and Ed and his circle can’t be so stupid they can’t guess into whose back the next dagger will be aimed. On top of that, Balls already has a lot of enemies and this sort of behaviour may be acceptable to MPs but tends to disgust the party rank and file. Milliband should show he has his own Balls and sack him. He probably won’t because he’s too weak.

  113. 113
    Engineer says:

    What do you mean, let him off bollocks? He can’t depart for Saudi and leave his bollocks here, can he?

  114. 114
    jgm2 says:

    Coup? I would split my bladder laughing.

  115. 115
    simon r says:

    Ed and Ed will be squabbling at bathtime with Gordon later.


  116. 116
    Coalition Wet Nappies says:

    Squinty is unsquashable, ’cause he’s just an automoton with an unfortunate blink system malfunction

  117. 117
    Deep Who says:

    ‘Planes leaves’? What kind of grammar is that you dirty whore

  118. 118
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    The one thing both Ed Balls and Ed Miliband have ‘had on their faces’ in the past is the BBC’s Economic Totty, Stephanie Flanders.

    When the two Eds start to disagree about economic policy, watch which way the Flanders Mare leans and we might get a clue which of the two was the better flap-licker.

  119. 119
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Thanks, once again.

    Screen, wine, keyboard etc.

  120. 120
    Bill Quango MP says:

    This is Rick Nobinson reporting.

    “Earlier today a man, believed to be Edward Balls, confronted Ed MrBean, and demanded that he be made Shadow chancellor. It is rumoured that he held a sock full of snooker balls in his fist and shouted ” I’mmm the Daddy now!”

    On Sunday last week Ed Balls’ wife, Servalan, had visited Alan Johnson and shown him a compromising DVD of a man resembling the shadow Chancellor, standing in the corner wearing a dunce’s cap, whilst an unidentified sexily clad schoolteacher holding a cane reads out the four times table. Mr Johnson resigned on the spot and posted his resignation immediately to Ed Milibean.
    Sadly, he forgot the 240mm by 165mm by 5mm bollocks regulation Labour introduced that made that resignation note count as a Large letter and that letter did not arrive until this evening.

    I’m Rick Nobinson,
    Standing outside wherever the shadow cabinet hang out, some pub probably, telling Peston to swivel on it….BBC News.

  121. 121
    Sally Bigcow says:

    Did I get that right, Ed ?? Can I be an MP now, pleeeeaaaassseee ???
    Pretty pleassseee ??

  122. 122
    Pickled Wizard says:

    Well, at least the entertainment has come back – no one in their right mind would have an affair with balls…..would they…?

  123. 123
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:

    PRETTYPOLLYTOYNBEE!!! (retch) (gag) (cuttle)

  124. 124

    I want the scalp of the Leader of the Labour party. I can wait.

  125. 125
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin says:


  126. 126
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    Al Johnson was absent at PMQs this week and Cameron drew specific attention to it. He obviously knew why, but was he/Coulson involved in the leaking process?

  127. 127
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Conservative-led Government — ??

    What a give-away.

  128. 128
    A says:

    “Oik” will be eaten raw by Big Bully Balls, you fucknut. Then he’ll pick his teeth with Osborne’s family tree. Because that’s what he does – or haven’t you been paying attention?

  129. 129
    Sally B says:

    My postman takes hours to come these days.

  130. 130
    jgm2 says:

    A year before? Just about the point where, with impeccable timing, Cameron turned his back on ten years of Tory Leaders and shadow-chancellor’s warning of Brown’s insane pyramid borrowing and decided that the way for the Tories to get back into power was to match Brown’s insane spending.

    I remember the fucking clown doing it. Ten years of Tories the whole thing was just a hologram created by borrowed money and he blows the T*ries economic credibility out of the water by aligning it with the Maximum Imbecile. Just to appeal to fucking muppets who didn’t give a sh1t how much money was borrowed as long as their benefit payments kept coming.


    Still, at least Ned Balls isn’t chancellor. Then you’d see some borrowing and squandering. Followed by some printing.

  131. 131
    Johan says:

    How can there be any thought of sacking him given he has just appointed him? I suppose it depends how much traction the ‘Balls did for Johnson’ story gets…

  132. 132
    Great British Public says:

    LOL !!

  133. 133
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Learn to spell Bigcowitz you meant Sham chancellor !

  134. 134
    Tessa Tickles says:


    And they can take the useless sack of shit, Deputy Speaker Dawn “Brown’s gimp-bitch” Primorolo, with them.

  135. 135
    jgm2 says:


  136. 136
    Mike Litorus says:

    If Prescott/Temple is possible…

    Excuse me while I go and pour bleach in my eyes now.

  137. 137
    Reds Under The Bed says:

    Even someone as low-life as little Balls might object to getting a reference from a self-confessed slapper whore like you.

  138. 138
    Pickled Wizard says:

    Maybe my gloucester old spot pig, but she’s ever so fucking fussy (after edballs made advances)

  139. 139
    jgm2 says:

    Ned squared.

  140. 140
    Ed Bollokov ( Son of Brown, Deficit-Admirer-in Chief ) says:

    None of my staff would have shafted Postman Prat. I love him so dearly. Honest…….

  141. 141
    Serpico says:

    He’s never going to be the leader, and you know it.

  142. 142
    Mike Litorus says:

    I admire your patience, I’d have to get someone to lock it away to keep me from using it on the obnoxious little turd…

  143. 143
    David Camoron says:

    I was just about to pack my bags in lieu of the inevitable, and this gets presented to me. Ed + Ed. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! I’m here ’till 2020 at the earliest.

    Mwa ha ha ha ha ha! Toodle pip.

  144. 144
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Its not really your day is it Anon?
    The most liked of the front bench has been replaced by the most despised.

    Putting a duplicitous,mendacious,brooding, dysfunctional, bitter, aggrieved, conceited backstabbing coup plotter has already been tried.

    How did it all work out again?
    lowest number of votes for thirty years?
    Second worse result in history, only just beating the esteemed Mr Foot?

    I’m sure Ed has made a wise decision and is very happy.
    Well, one of them is.

  145. 145
    Dick the Prick says:

    Where’s Brown?

  146. 146
    thinkov says:

    can’t wait to see Ed B wipe the floor with no bed George

    it’s gonna be arma gideon time

  147. 147
    Reds Under The Bed says:

    That was irony,, dear boy.

  148. 148
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Ideal world !
    Blair get’s ripped apart tomorrow morning at Chilcott
    International arrest warrant issued by the Hague in the afternoon

    perfect day !

  149. 149
    Tessa Tickles says:

    He’s off-message. It’s supposed to be “tory-led” (note lower case T).

  150. 150
    Dick Scratcher says:

    4. Did he lick her back side before pressing her down?

  151. 151
    Mike Hunt says:

    That’s my vaguely amusing comment for 2011 out of the way, back to my usual crap.

  152. 152
    jgm2 says:

    Why? Johnson was a comedic gift to economics and a gift from God to the T*ries.

    While Ned (Balls) is merely wrong about everything Alan Johnson was utterly clueless and irrelevant.

    Ned is wrong but he’s stridently, arrogantly, brayingly, sneeringly, self-confidently wrong – like the Maximum Imbecile before him – that people get taken in by his self-confidence. After all, they will reason, how could anybody be so cock-sure and be completely wrong?

    Brown will show you how that mind-set works.

  153. 153
    retardEd Miliband says:

    High taxes? “So what?” Deficit? “What’s that?”

    More of the same from retardEd’s “new [old dinosaur] generation”

  154. 154
    Tom Badwind says:

    Balls has got more baggage than the handlers at Heathrow Airport in a snowstorm.

  155. 155
    Engineer says:

    Wonder if Yvette will be enjoying his post-neoclassical endogenous growth tonight?

  156. 156
    Mike Litorus says:

    He finally finished Economics for Dummies, got a look at the books and said “Fuck this for a game of Soldiers”

  157. 157
    potato jones says:

    Methinks the Murdopress is seeking to squeeze Blair getting spit-roasted by Chilcot out of the weekend news agenda.
    Balls is as Balls does. But Rupe is wilier.

  158. 158
    Pickled Wizard says:

    Now, at last, Ed ‘hitler’ balls gets the chance to design his own uniform as chancellor of the shadow reichstadt. No doubt him and eva cooper will be out buying an alsation this weekend, maybe digging the garden with a view to a bunker, and who knows, a trip to the dentist for his’n’hers cyanide capsules (though I bet his contain only ribena!)

  159. 159
    jgm2 says:

    He’s got lock-jaw or something. He’s developing the same rigor mortis in the jaw that the Maximum Imbecile had.

    They do say people start to resemble their dogs.

  160. 160
    Tom Badwind says:

    See 149 above.

  161. 161
    Gordon Brown says:

    I ended the cycle of boom and bust.

    Please buy my book.

  162. 162
    Pickled Wizard says:

    Nope – just delivering his post!

  163. 163
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin says:

    It’ll be a zero percent rise.

  164. 164
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    It always takes longer if you don’t touch the sides.

  165. 165
    jgm2 says:

    George has seen off three Labour chancellors already.

    And Balls is implicated in the Brownian economic clusterfuck right up to his lying eyeballs.

    My money is on George and not the deficit denier.

  166. 166
    Anonymous says:

    Only despised by you twats, not by the voters.

  167. 167
    Anonymous says:

    Mrs Johnson?

  168. 168
  169. 169
    Mike Litorus says:

    Ed Bollox couldn’t wipe his arse without Gordon telling him what to do..

  170. 170
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Shortly before Bradford gets nuked, for national security reasons.

  171. 171
    Joss Taskin says:

    When do we get to see photos of Postman Prat’s totty/tranny/toe-toucher ??

  172. 172
    Red Ed & Dickhead HM official opposition says:

    Thith is a hithtoric day for our parthy.

    Mithter Othbourne ith toatht.

    Pleath don’th be nathty to our new chanthellor, we know he’th fucked the Uk buth he thinkth he hath the tholuthion.

    Thankth for lithening folkths.

  173. 173
    AC1 says:

    From the choices made it looks like it was “written” on bog-roll.

  174. 174
    Engineer says:

    Why do the Left laud a man who was a senior adviser, and then a Treasury minister, during and in the prelude to the worst economic disaster in Britain’s peacetime history? Balls does not have a record of success by any definition, does he?

  175. 175
    AC1 says:

    Where’s my Shotgun? That parrots going mad.

  176. 176
    Ed Balls is a cunt says:

    Wouldn’t it be delightful and ironic if that poisonous Ed Balls got testicular cancer?

    At least Alan Johnson is a human being. There’s a reason why so many Tories this evening have said they got on with him and are sorry to see him go. Blinky is a loathsome evil little snake.

  177. 177
    Coalition Wet Nappies says:

    Seems to have some serious malfunctions as a human replica.

    A complete overhaul at labour android productions is recommended.

    Especially unfortunate that the rictus smirk was held throughout the interview.

  178. 178
    Tessa Tickles says:


  179. 179
    Mike Litorus says:

    That explains the massive majority then…

  180. 180
    Electorate says:


  181. 181
    Bled White Taxpayer says:


  182. 182
    AC1 says:

    and Alive.

  183. 183
    Anonymous says:

    Am I on the correct web site? This seems to be EDL’s.

  184. 184
    Anonymous says:

    This is dire shite even for fuckwit like Sally Longbottom.

  185. 185
    Reds Under The Bed says:

    Just remind me how the Crewe & Nantwich bye-election went – remember, Labour’s Tory Toffs campaign?

    Answer – they were wiped out.

    Balls’ long history of economic imbicility is well known – he was whispering in McMental’s ear every step of the way over the fucking cliff. All the blood is on his hands.

    AND we have the psychodrama of the Battle of the Eds so like the TB-GBs. For Balls, Miliband junior has always been the nerdy runt sitting in the corner of the room.

  186. 186
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    Twice, by all accounts

  187. 187
    jgm2 says:

    Balls was lucky to hold on to his seat last time out. If Balls was anything other than totally nasty he’d have, like Brown, have secured himself a nice safe seat crammed to the rafters with Labour-voting imbeciles.

    If Balls was liked by anybody within the party he’d have been elected leader.

    Balls is, like Brown, only good for one thing. Sticking the fucking boot in. Once he turns his attention to policy or running a department or any trivial shit like that he’ll inevitably fuck up in spades. Just like the Maximum Imbecile before him.

    The problem for Balls is that fresh in the voter’s mind is the image of one cock-sure, nasty, class-warrior fucking the economy through strident incompetence. And now, with Balls, they’re being presented with a clone of Brown.

    Balls might manage to stick the knife in enough Labour MPs to get to be Labour leader but, like Brown before him, he’ll find that the UK public simply will not put up with such an odious, incompetent jackass as their PM.

  188. 188
    getting used to this now says:

    agree. I thought we had moved on from having to fall on your sword due to personal indiscretion. The poor missus, finding out like this.

  189. 189
    A Bloke says:


    FFS you couln’t make this up, the Labour triolls are licking their dicks in a squat somewhere in Pimlico.

    If ever proof was needed of a party devoid of talent or direction we see it here and now.

    This is better than Labour under Kinnock or Foot, this is comedy genious.


  190. 190
    ichabod says:

    But which Labour frontbencher is the father of Alice Miles’s child ?

  191. 191
    Anonymous says:

    Special delivery … sausages up Regent Street…

  192. 192
    jgm2 says:

    One of the main reasons the T*ries are sorry to see him go was that he was so crashingly incompetent that, compared to him, the T*ries could do anything they liked.

  193. 193
    Anonymous says:

    Hahahahahaha….poor old Ed had to rely on postal voters, and most of them don’t even fucking exist!

  194. 194
    retardEd Miliband says:

    That’s what they all said about me.

  195. 195
    Hugh Janus says:

    You’re certainly in with a chance if it’s an all-male shortlist.

  196. 196
  197. 197
    Crikey says:

    Treachery sometimes pays off doesn’t it Blinky? At least in the short term. BTW what the F%^& did you and Gordon do with all our money?

  198. 198
    Anonymous says:

    it’s all a load of bollocks
    and bollocks to it all

  199. 199
    ssdb says:

    You’re a twat.

  200. 200
    AC1 says:

    Was it Malignant Narcissism or Dunning Kruger or BOTH?

  201. 201
    Kinnochio & McDoom says:

    We’ve got our party back! Well alright!

  202. 202
    Reds Under The Bed says:

    Clapp, clappy, clap clap!!!!

  203. 203
    One of the Great Unwashed says:

    Remember the photo of Postman Pat having his 2 hour plus lunch at the Savoy Grill the same day he had been doing the media rounds berating Osborne’s VAT rise (Tues 4 Jan)
    Who would have known in detail,before hand PP’s planned schedule for the day, enough time for someone to ensure that a photo would emerge as the incident was leaked………..looks like blinky’s sticky finger prints all over this…..

    Has anyone advised Milliepeed Minor about the real need of an effective stab proof vest……he will certainly need it, sooner rather later……

  204. 204
    jgm2 says:

    I think that it’s settled fact that it was Brown who couldn’t wipe his arse without Ned telling him what to do.

    This economic clusterfuck, like much Brown liked to claim credit for, was not entirely of his own doing. Sure, Brown was the front-man – but Balls was the idiot behind the throne.

    Blair had Mandelson and Campbell. Brown had Balls.

    I’ve said it before – Brown didn’t act alone. He couldn’t fuck the economy single handedly. Balls was his chief enabler.

  205. 205
    Lady Macbeth says:

    Deviously plausible, one problem, if that was it then the scoop would have been on the Times front page today.

    Balls is the man with blood on his hands…. out damned spot!

  206. 206
    Slipper of the Yard says:

    Our investigations suggest it cannot be all three.

  207. 207
    Totty Watch says:

    Balls is a loathsome scum bag – why don’t they prosecute him for the expenses he double claimed with his misses.

  208. 208
    jgm2 says:

    Biting the inside of his cheek to try and send pain messages all round his body to fool his own nervous system so that he wouldn’t betray the characteristic ‘tells’ of being a bare-faced liar.

  209. 209
    Bled White Taxpayer says:


    give the keyword search criteria to a journo, or Assange, or someone who’ll do an FOI, FFS. IF it’s true, it’s too good to waste. And IF it’s true, there’s a murdered toddler whose memory you can help commemorate.

  210. 210
    13eastie says:

    Ѕреаkіng оf сuntѕ, tоnіght’ѕ QТ lіnе-uр іѕ рrеtty fuсkіng ѕресіаl:

    Саrоlіnе Ѕреlmаn
    Аlаѕtаіr Саmрbеll
    Ѕіmоn Нughеѕ
    Gеоrgе Gаllаwаy
    Сlаrkе Саrlіѕlе

  211. 211
    nell says:

    What a loathsome, unlovely couple the balls’ are!!

    postmanpat was an incompetent fool when it came to economics but he was one of the last few remaining gentlemen of the labour party (and let’s face it they’ve had very few of them in the last 13 years!)

    If the balls’ have done a character assa’ssin’ation/out ing job on him , and I believe you guido that they have because that couple would do anything for power, then the rest of the labour party should stuff ‘em down a hole!!

    As an afterthought , if the balls’ have done this, the labour party will hate them. So why then has edmilitwit made ed’ecoerogenousexpert on spending more than you earn’balls, chancellor?

    Another bad militwit decision!!

  212. 212
    retardEd Miliband says:

    Thith ith why I have created a New Generation.

    Oh, fuckit, I can’t maintain the pretenth any more. It’th too boring even for me.

    Thame old thit. The unionth made me do it.

  213. 213
    Anonymous says:

    Fuck me- Balls really is a fucking poisonous, despicable sack of shit.

  214. 214
    QWERTY says:

    I thought she was a dyke? They’re all dykes at the BBC.

  215. 215
    Balls for Britain! says:

    I wonder what Gordon is whispering in Eds ear tonight.

  216. 216
    Hootch says:

    Be interesting to see if the civil servant is disciplined this time. When Prezza was caught nailing Tracey Temple, the reds were in power and could hush it up. I am really looking forward to finding out the the Dept that the tw@t is from and what coalition Minister will have the responsibility to invesigate any breaches of the Code.

    More power to Guido – you won me a bet!!

  217. 217
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    You misheard. It’s “Youfless”, and so it must be true.

  218. 218
    nell says:

    Yes you have and we are so relieved about that.

    Now take it away and bury it in the wilds of Wales because we are all so glad to be shut of it!!

  219. 219
    jgm2 says:

    Galloway ‘v’ Campbell.

    I think, in another life, Galloway could have fucked the UK even more comprehensively than Brown with his economic outlook but I like what George did to the US Senate Committee (was it?) over the Iraq enquiry.

    Should be a classic.

  220. 220
    It's the way I tell 'em says:

    Belardinelli? Isn’t that a brand of pasta sauce?

  221. 221
    Tell it like it really is says:

    What goes around comes around – Balls will not profit – nor will Gollum aka red ed.

  222. 222
    Tessa Tickles says:

    He’s very proud that he’s “studied the economy for 25 years”.

    And only fucked it up for 13 of them.

  223. 223
    Wayne Kerr says:

    He’s holding his Balls?

  224. 224
    Laing says:

    yes, all c’unts, agreed

  225. 225
    QWERTY says:

    John Craig on sky News

    “All of the top shadow cabinet jobs are held by Brown’s cronies”

    Over at the BBC, “Alan Johnson was a genius and economic genius, a man who was greater than Winston St Churchill, he was the white Mandela”

    Prick Robinson still has shit all around his mouth from licking Johnson’s rectum clean, soon to be followed by blowing Ed Ball’s

  226. 226
    Arsehull of Progress says:

    Let’s head for the endogenous growth zone.

  227. 227
    HealthnSafety says:

    Isn’t putting him on a boat safer?

  228. 228
    One of the Great Unwashed says:

    yes great, like Xmas all over again with Bliar on his way to the Hague with in 48 hours, and at last this war monger will be brought to account….

  229. 229
    Paper Pulping Industries PLC says:

    We’ve bought loads of copies.

  230. 230
    Tell it like it really is says:

    Gollum is on the end of a very thin and perilous branch, thick as he is he knows he is very close to being ousted so he looks to curry slight support by appointing B b b bbb Blinky.

  231. 231
    Anonymous says:

    Do I really have to remind you that you don’t have a majority or a mandate and had to be propped up by the liberals you hate? Look at the polls. Labour will have a majority next time and you will be licking each others wounds.

  232. 232
    nell says:

    Hmm. You call itm special I call that rubbish!

    Who wants to listen to a panel of losers?!

    The only question I have is ‘when is cameron going to get rid of spelman?’

  233. 233
    Blinky's personal poodle is a cunt says:

    A quick google and we find Belardinelli has previous.


  234. 234
    jgm2 says:

    Ask Haringey Council how expensive is ‘too expensive’ – how much can it cost to dig out an e-mail? Fifty quid? Hundred quid? Two hundred quid? and then have Guido launch an appeal.

    Give them the fucking money to dig out the e-mail.

  235. 235
    Bogeyman says:

    Anyone else noticed the Grauniad website has been down for several hours? I am bereft.

  236. 236
  237. 237
    bodo says:

    “I’m Rick Nobinson, Standing outside wherever the shadow cabinet hang out,”

    Well done Rick, but Sky have just shown live pics of Johnson scurrying rat-like from a constituency meeting in Hull. BBC meanwhile showing some Labour talking-head in a studio somewhere. Is £3.5bn a year not enough for the Beeb to chase a story?

  238. 238
    Balls for Britain! says:

    Retardinelli more like.

  239. 239
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    Wow !! Webcams in Gordon’s boudoir !!

  240. 240
    A says:

    Balls is the guy who stands behind the leader slamming his fists into the palm of his other hand. He knows this [loves doing it and hates its limits], he knows he’s got Ed where he wants him and he knows neither him or the missus will be accepted. He may be a moron but he’ll take Osborne apart limb from fucking limb.

  241. 241
    Lady Macbeth says:

    out damned spot!

  242. 242
    Anonymous says:

    Big nuke, please. Take out 50 miles all around.

  243. 243
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:

    SSQUAA-AAARRRKK!!! (flapflapflap) (flutter) (tremble)

  244. 244
    A says:

    Or fist, even. I’m certainly not suggesting he has more than two hands.

  245. 245
    genghiz the kahn says:

    BBC News 24 AJ is a saint…sadly missed…wonderful guy etc.

    Meanwhile Cameron kicks the support away from the disabled, and they are still highlighting that Mumsnet story for what its worth.

    Help Labour its in the DNA of the Hoons at White Powder City.

  246. 246
    Blinky's personal poodle is a cunt says:

    Now here’s an interesting one. A certain Alex Belardinelli submitted a comment to a BBC Online “Talking Point” about Stephen B(L)yers in 2002. An objective opinion of course!

    Who actually cares about Martin Sixsmith? Does anyone seriously believe that anyone voting in last week’s elections gave any thought to this dragged out affair? The press always need a petty and insignificant story they can resurrect from the grave whenever there’s a dull patch in the news. In 2000 it was the Dome, in 2001 it was foot-and-mouth, now its Stephen Byers. If Byers went it would not be a victory for democracy, but for the trivia obsessed press. The fact that the Tories are still going on about it proves three things. Firstly, what an embarrassingly incompetent opposition the Government faces. Secondly, how out of touch with public opinion the Conservatives are. And finally, that they have nothing of substance to say about anything else. Byers is actually starting to make a real difference in transport and regional government. Taking back control of Railtrack will perhaps turn out to be one of the best decisions the Government has ever made. Tory Transport Chief Theresa May still hasn’t been able to lay a finger on him. Judging by her performance today I think will be sacked long before Byers ever is.
    Alex Belardinelli, UK


  247. 247
    what ever he's on, I don't want any says:

    In your wet dreams knobhead.

  248. 248
    Gordon says:

    Today I am going to be a chocolate digestive biscuit.

  249. 249
    Blinky's personal poodle is a cunt says:

    There’s one thing to be said for Alex Belardinelli. He has a face you could never tire of punching.

  250. 250
    Anonymous says:

    Two Ed’s are better than one

  251. 251
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    Not Steph – bangs like a shit-house door in a gale, apparently.

  252. 252
    Mr Slater says:

    Go easy on the old fellah, Mr AC1 – where he comes from, Freddie Davies is a sex symbol…

  253. 253
    Muslims smell says:

    You still here muzee? Shouldn’t you be out stoning women for not wearing a burka and chanting Death to the America?

  254. 254
    Bill Quango MP says:


  255. 255
    A says:

    No because it’s not down.

  256. 256
    Bogeyman says:

    Yes, the postman was a gentleman in the same way as the floor manager of my local carpet shop is a gentleman.

    He, too, is dreary little man with a nasal voice.

  257. 257
    Lard Presclott of Bulimia, Bog Seats, Beams,Bellies,Banjos,Punches, Croquet, Pies, Jags 'n' Shags says:


  258. 258
    Tessa Tickles says:

    I saw this, too. “Alan Johnson spoke human, Ed Balls speaks pure economics.”

    No, sorry toenails, Ed “so what” Balls speaks pure bollocks. The BBC needs to know we know this.

  259. 259
    AC1 says:

  260. 260
    government warning says:

    Stay clear of the chocolate fingers.

  261. 261
    denverthen says:

    A [i]coup d’twats[/i] if ever I saw one.

  262. 262
    Engineer says:

    Belardinelli = McBride Mk II ?

  263. 263
    Stephen Byers says:

    Someone call a taxi for hire ??

  264. 264
    Bogeyman says:

    Well I can’t open it. Everything else works (if it didn’t, I wouldn’t be able to post this, would I?).

  265. 265
    Lady Macbeth says:

    and I will have my wicked way at last!!!

    out damned spot…

  266. 266
    Observer says:

    Look what Ed did to his brother. Enough said.

  267. 267
    Socialist Worker says:

    Didnt ZaNuLabour have some sort of strictly style dance off for the shadow cabinet after Ed’s union mates made him commisar? And didn’t Ed Bollocks come precisely nowhere in that dance off?

    not so democratic of Ed to give him the job just like that

  268. 268
    Tell it like it really is says:

    Yay! :)

  269. 269
    nell says:


    ed’knifeintheback’balls and yvette’i’mbetterthanyou’cooper and their plan to get into the mega money of no 10 downing street, as pm and chancellor, by smearing postmanpat!!

    Entertaining isn’t it? this labour in-fighting!!!

    And doesn’t it show people like the balls’ up in their real colours??!!

    Labour are such a backstabbing bunch aren’t they??!

    They’d ki ll their granny for her slippers wouldn’t they??!!

  270. 270
    McPoison says:

    I have never met Ed Balls.

  271. 271
    Anonymous says:

    Just like the rest of Liebour party.

  272. 272
    Tessa Tickles says:

    (thinking wishfully) Will it be passing the coast of Somalia?

  273. 273
    Enoch P says:

    I take it there some history to provoke that comment. Very ungentlemanly and off topic.

  274. 274
    thought for the gay says:

    Hehe smoking bum affair….funny

  275. 275
    Serpico says:

    It’s never going to happen, because the other Red Ed is never going to be leader. You’re just using this to massage your own ego.

  276. 276
    ToryMP says:

    i’m not prepared to comment

  277. 277
    A says:

    Well, the live blog on Johnson basically says head for Guido so you’re in the right place.

  278. 278
    John Alex Wood says:

    Too easy.

    But since explosives are strictly Islamic tools of democracy now, I vote for poison. Slow-acting contact neurotoxin on the Expenses Claim Forms should do nicely.

  279. 279
    angelnstar says:

    KEN Livingstone is working and being paid by PRESS t.v. One of the founders denies the Holocaust, is homophobic and rejects the concept of womens’ rights.



  280. 280
    david cameron says:

    two eds are better than one. he he he

  281. 281
    Anonymous says:

    Took the words right out of my mouth…

    He will be King….He MUST BE!…

  282. 282
    AC1 says:

    Is this as accurate as the prediction that Alan Johnson will be PM?

  283. 283
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    The whole grubby episode has made absolutely clear that RedEd has no power whatsoever and is a glove-Muppet wielded by whoever can get his or her hand up. The battle of the Looting Parteh tribes went public tonight. Dave and Nick can now proceed with their plans secure in the knowledge that Labour will present no threat whatsoever for the next 8-10 years.There’s nowhere for the LibDem squishy Left to go, and the Tory Right are unlikely to take the nuclear option now that Labour are self-destructing.

  284. 284
    nell says:

    No bogeyman you are wrong about that.

    posrtmanpat really was a decent human being and a gentleman.

    He was hopeless in economics and miltwit was wrong to give him that brief .

    But balls has made a fatal political decision here to attack his personal life in order to get the job of shadow chancellor.

    balls is now exposed for what he is : an ass ass in. In short an ass!!

    If he ever had any respect fron anyone , and I doubt that, he’s lost it now!!

  285. 285
    sh202 says:

    Jonah Brown is The Freakfather, he’s back in command:

  286. 286
    Engineer says:

    Or possibly ‘Being A Total Twat’ syndrome.

  287. 287
    Voter says:

    you know what?

    the real losers in all of this are, as usual, the electorate. We have a coalition that is quite wobbly, to say the least – an opportunistic government that nobody voted for. And an opposition that looks like it couldn’t make a jelly trifle without falling out or even falling in it!

    It says clearly that UK politics is in the shit which is great in the economic circumstances we find ourselves. These bastards, paid by us, are plainly only interested in their own situations and don’t give a toss about the people who pay them to be there.

    They should all resign before they find themselves in gaol or we physically kick the shit out of them

  288. 288
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Not until he’s balanced the constituencies he won’t.

  289. 289
    Tell it like it really is says:

    The speakers’ wife twitters stuff
    Inane, immoderate idiot musings,
    Vacuous, greedy and boy, she’s rough
    Slappers never change their markings.

  290. 290
    nell says:

    You’d say you’ve never met gordon if you thought that would benefit the labour party!!??

  291. 291
    AC1 says:

    I’m guessing it wasn’t his wife at the Savoy having a two hour lunch with him?

  292. 292
    Anonymous says:

    The postmen had something fall on his pork sword that wasn’t his missus is the problem.

  293. 293
    Bogeyman says:

    This is odd. I wanted to give Balls a kicking.

  294. 294
    It doesn't add up... says:

    Lie Bridle LAN?

  295. 295
    pissed off voters says:

    sadly, cameron protects the thieves in his party.

  296. 296
    Voter says:

    lilly-livered and totally untalented Ed has had a gun stuck in his ear by babyface Balls for a while now – it’s called democracy don’t you know.

  297. 297
    AC1 says:

    Sun Headline? “Alan Johnson and murdered hermaphrodite”

  298. 298
    robbie says:

    because its a deficit-denying shadow cabinet in full from now on. Bollocks Ed is the worst D-D of the lot so who better to re-launch the attempt by loony Lab to re-write economic history.

    What a parade of brownish tosh in that shadow cabinet…and FTLOG (!) wee doogie as shadow foreign minister. Lets hope they give him lots of fact finding trips.

  299. 299
    Milliepeed Minor says:

    Yes I talk to Gordon & Neil everyday……….

    But thats the last fcuking time I’ll listen to Ed “Blinky” Balls……..the fcuking ar*ehole…..

  300. 300
    Manlickscum & Sweaty Ball says:

    Oh swell, Balls is back. All swell that ends swell.

  301. 301
    A says:

    Right, if we’re resorting to puns I’m going to say “The Ballbarians are at the gates” in reference to Ed and Yvette’s little coup.

  302. 302
    nell says:

    That’ll be the tory mp whose singing tie embarrassed him when he started to speak in the HoC!!

    What an idiot!!

  303. 303
    Tell it like it really is says:

    Surround with 40ft brick wall – waterproof – fill with water.

  304. 304
    Pickled Wizard says:

    I say old chap – thats a bit hard on shit dont you think?

  305. 305
    HandsomeDavid says:

    They could drop down with a lemon in their mouth and a J Arthur to boot.

    Way to go, autoerotic asphyxiation.

  306. 306
    nell says:

    Guido your have a problem with tory singing ties do you?!

  307. 307
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Tessa Jowell tries to defend Johnson and Ed Balls-up.

    Ed Balls-up has terrible form on the economy, and his PPE degree means sh1t to everyone who has experienced the Blair/Brown/Balls economy.

  308. 308
    Peter Mandleson says:

    Balls will probably never be leader, but look at me!!!
    Ha ha ha ha ha……..

  309. 309
    The house of shirtlifters says:

    I hope it is a female civil servant. There has been far too many fufge packer revelations of late.

  310. 310
    robbie says:

    Sure its female ? or is it a dress unknown ?

  311. 311
    A says:

    A lot of people do but I wouldn’t advise it in actuality. I see him as a sort of “Mongo” figure. Nothing works against him, he just plows through you like a rapey ape.

  312. 312
    Plug that dyke! says:

    Even George Alagiah. The ‘butchest’ of the BBC’s lesbatrons…

  313. 313
    Anonymous says:

    Looking forward to seeing Brillo’s take on the subject later tonight.

  314. 314
    Pundit says:

    Labour politicians eh? Don’t you love them? They’d make their own babies into kebabs if it furthered their “careers”.

  315. 315
    Bogeyman says:

    Did I say the floor manager of my carpet shop was not a gentleman? He is. So by all accounts is A. Johnson.

    But AJ was tipped as Labour leader, ergo a possible future Prime Minister. They have to deal with people like the President of the USA. Obama does not need new carpets.

  316. 316
    Lady Macbeth says:

    I’m liking this Shakespearian theme

  317. 317
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    He probably has got more than two hands. All his colleagues now know that he is a double-dealing, double-crossing shit.

  318. 318
    Robespierre says:

    If you need some help just give me a shout. Success guaranteed.

  319. 319
    fartinatrance says:

    I like your ‘jelly’ theme, what with ‘wobbly coalitions’ and ‘trifle’…I bet that nice Ed balls likes trifle , he is always got that smile on his face.

  320. 320
    Tortoise & the hare says:

    I shall miss the tortoise features of the economic wizard Al Jonson? or whoever he was.

  321. 321
    KaboomBoomBoom says:

    Is Alex the same chap as “belardinellia@parliament.uk” who uses his work email address uses for Paypal payments? I paid him at this email address in 2004. Didn’t know civil servants were allowed to use govt property for personal profit.

  322. 322
    David Minibanana says:

    Never turn your back on this Liebour opposition.

  323. 323
    Anonymous says:

    Ha! When was the LAST time you shower of morris dancing wickers “physically kicked ” the shit out of YOUR govt??

    If you HAD, then this country would perhaps have been one we could have been proud of!


  324. 324
    bodo says:

    Yup, and it’s hard to imagine the Beeb making a fool of Johnson by asking him about employers’ NI rates… and replaying the clip.

  325. 325
    AnotherAnon. says:

  326. 326
    PD77 says:

    Only a sandwich? to be quite frank a better analogy would be six cans short of a six pack!

  327. 327
    Alan Johnson, good egg says:

    In this case it appears it’s true that it couldn’t have happened to a nicer fella.

  328. 328
    robbie says:


  329. 329
    Icarus says:

    Prescott and Johnson, both caught with Civil Servants, both from Hull. What is wrong with Hull women?

  330. 330
    Gooey Blob says:

    Alan Johnson was that rarest of things, a likeable politician. Maybe he wasn’t up to being chancellor, but given his track record, neither is Ed Balls.

    Labour have lost a Labrador, and only Rottweilers remain on the front bench. A pity.

  331. 331
    Anonymous says:

    All Moslems are dangerous terrorists.
    All socially concerned humans are the enemy within.
    Greed is good.
    So is pain, evidenced from the cheers ringing out from the government benches at the news of cuts, cuts and more cuts to front line services, as opposed to management.

    Don’t ya just love Conservatism?

  332. 332
    guido gayda says:

    Actually, I look forward to our weekly outing.

  333. 333
    6EQUJ5 says:

    Yep, the ‘New Generation’…….Ed and Ed..the New Chuckle Brothers.

  334. 334
    Anonymous says:

    You missed my question. If Brown was as unpopular as you say, why did you not win the election? If Labour is as hated as you say, why are they ahead in the polls?

  335. 335
    Pundit says:

    Time to up the medication.

  336. 336
    The Rev'd David Boulton says:

    If all this is true – then we really should not let any of these hateful people anywhere near the levers of power. Left, right or middle-of-the-road, you just cannot trust a politician to be anything other than devious and self-serving.

  337. 337
    The Socialist Nightmare Is Always Near At Hand says:

    “Yet still Miliband rewarded him with the prize he craved… ”

    Well, that will be because although a supposedly educated man, Miliband is a dim fuck

  338. 338
    Anonymous says:

    Bliss to see the liebour scum knifing one another in the back. But still the dumbos say ” Ave voted Labour all me life……..”

  339. 339
    A quick recap says:

    Yes, much history. LM despises anything that isn’t Islamic.

  340. 340
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    He should address the postal voting scam as well.

  341. 341
    Dan says:

    First visit to this site and what a disappointment. The comments read like a special needs edition of the Daily Mail. Sad.

  342. 342
    Eunuchonomics says:

    Praise the Lord!

  343. 343
    Anonymous says:

    But apart from the mongs here, does the rest of the country really care?

  344. 344
    Liebore says:

    Kinnochio: I’ve got my party back.

    Brown: I’ve got my potty back.

  345. 345
  346. 346
    QWERTY says:

    Fuck off you crack head leftie wanker.

  347. 347
    Little nell says:

    Not half.

  348. 348
    Wasi says:

    “All Moslems are dangerous terrorists.”

    Almost true, you just left out “potentially”

  349. 349
    Anonymous says:

    as opposed to those, oh so gentlemanly tories…..

    pull the other one pundit

  350. 350
    Baroness Warsi says:

    No! I’ve come here to escape from all that! If I loved my faith, I’d live in Ir*an or Saud*i Arab*ia. But I choose to live here, where there’s freedom.

    How I hate it here. You’re all bigots.

  351. 351
    QWERTY says:

    As usual when a leftie c u n t gets found out shagging of the side the BBC goes easy, just like fat northern shit (OK I know he’s Welsh as well) Prescott

  352. 352
    Dan says:

    Kinnochio? Oh FFS grow up.

  353. 353
    Anonymous says:

    Said the special needs Daily Mail reader.

  354. 354
    Anonymous says:

    Why Pundit, are you sick?

  355. 355
    Gordon says:

    Today I will be mostly feeling… extremely smug

  356. 356
    Dan says:


  357. 357
    Anonymous says:

    I have never been on this site until now, but it is worse than I could have imagined.

  358. 358
    grobdj says:

    Much play being made of Blinky’s First from Oxford, particularly Rick Nobinson who implies Balls is some kind of economic guru

    PPE=Philosophy, Politics and Economics………..

    Ed Balls’ economic credentials are already toast, so Oxford may not be the best place to educate your children

  359. 359
    MI5 snuff squad says:

    That’s what we hoped you’d think.

  360. 360
    Anonymous says:



    This is the external expression of the average tory’s inner life…


  361. 361
    Engineer says:

    Anonymous – you forgot to say, “There is no deficit”.

  362. 362
    Herman Achille Van Rompuy says:

    Winter not over
    Personal reasons could not
    be foreseen. Balls up.

  363. 363
    literate pedant says:

    allegedly dear stephanie the bbc economics whizz used to get jiggy with both of the Ed’s……..not at the same time ….as far as we know…..

    i’m sure the hazy memories of those two sex-gods slithering on top of her help her maintain her marvellous impartiality when telling the great unwahsed just why labour are economic genii…….

  364. 364
    J Harker says:

    At least Balls has a reflection.

  365. 365
    Labour Sleaze says:

    Labour Sleaze continues apace.

  366. 366
    Ed & Ed comedy duo. says:

    Let the comedy commence.

  367. 367
    Anonymous says:

    I think you’ll find that was a tory pervert, not a labour one… and anyway wasn’t it an orange. I reckon he was killed by MI5, but that’s another story…

  368. 368
    Ed's Weakness Exposed says:

    “Alan was the BEST man for the job” !!

    Keep close to your friends but closer to your enemies, eh Ed ?

    Come the Ides of March you’ll have wished you hadn’t made today’s appointment.

    Bad decision, Ed. Bad for you, bad for my country. Typical Labour.

    You have just given Balls & Co a tilt at the nation’s leader-in-future.
    Toenails is already fawning.

    Goodnight Ed.

  369. 369
    Engineer says:

    Which one? There’s a house full of them, and they still keep creating them.

  370. 370
    Anonymous says:

    have you just creamed yourself, robbie?

  371. 371
    Prime Minister Gordon Brown says:


  372. 372
    Anonymous says:

    Your imagination is fucking shite then is all I can say.

  373. 373
    Dan says:

    I seriously expected adult discussion. This is embarrassing. Just childish insults being hurled. Cringeworthy.

  374. 374
    Engineer says:

    It’s quicker to type than ‘the Welsh windbag’.

  375. 375
    Anonymous says:

    Well said.
    Kudos to everyone but Ed (RIP) Miliband
    The lunatics are again out of the asylum.
    Be afraid, UK, be very afraid.

  376. 376
    Dan says:

    I suspect that is actually all you can say. That’s what depresses me.

  377. 377
    Tom Baldwin says:

    Vote Ed get Ed

  378. 378
    sign man says:

    Follow the sign to the Guardian/BBC Group >>>>>>>>>>>

  379. 379
    Anonymous says:

    Goodbye then. (you won’t be missed)

  380. 380
    QWERTY says:

    Take a read at our soldiers ripping some BBC c u n t anew arse on this forum.

    Fuck the BBC


  381. 381
    Dan says:

    Rick Nobinson? Please fucking GROW UP.

  382. 382
    Foodmanuk says:

    If the suggestion that Ed Balls has caused the resignation is true then it makes millibands decision to promote him as being disgraceful. No honour amongst thieves I would venture.

  383. 383
    Anonymous says:

    Not in the HoC pension fund.
    Surely that is the yardstick of the nation’s health and prosperity?

  384. 384
    mum says:

    Dan, go and watch your special boxed set of the Chuckle Brothers, there’s a good lad.

  385. 385
    Jeff Hoon says:

    I’m free !

  386. 386
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Labour couldn’t even get enough seats to form a coalition if they included every other political party in the country.
    That’s how much Labour lost by.
    That’s the scale of your defeat.
    If even your natural allies, the left of centre Liberals wouldn’t support you, how unpopular do you think Labour was?

    But go ahead and believe what you want.

    Alan Johnson quit because he’s got a job as head of the IMF.
    Ed Miliband was elected by 102% of the party.
    Gordon Brown won the election in 2010 by 120 seats.
    Ed Balls is right. There is no deficit. Its all just lies.
    Bush forced Blair to go to war with mind drugs.
    The Post Offices all closed because their owners didn’t want them anymore.
    42 days detention without trial was an invention of the Tories.
    James Gordon Brown NEVER raised the threshold of inheritance tax to help the most well off in society, whilst scamming the poorest on the 10p tax increase..


    lalalalalalalalalalala can’t hear you if we don’t want to..lalalalal

  387. 387
    literate pedant says:

    because a large proportion of the country are as thick as shite and want something for nothing…….which is basically labour economic policy……take from productive people to give to money grubbing underclass client state and borrow any shortfall in the bribes account. simples

  388. 388
    Anonymous says:

    It’s not. It’s a pile of crap invented by Coulson and put out by Guido as soon as he was able to remove his tongue from his master’s sphincter.

  389. 389
    John Lennon says:

    Then you have No imagination

  390. 390
    Red Ed & Thick Ed says:

    Two Eds are better than one, especially with these two useless Huntz.

  391. 391
    Anonymous says:

    Fuck off you po faced twat, and take your tight arsed pal with ya.

  392. 392
    mikesdog08 says:

    Ed Will take “Gideon the nodding donkey” too the cleaners.

  393. 393
    Anonymous says:

    Will the last Guardian reader please switch off the lights.

  394. 394
    Dan says:

    Childish. So embarrassingly childish.

  395. 395
    Dandy says:

    don’t hurry back Dan. You must be desperate.

  396. 396
    Anonymous says:

    I suspect you’re knob, but carry on.

  397. 397
    Eeu to me says:

    Do tell why,here we are just normal tribal bluetops having a chat on what’s happening with those evil reds and you come along as an anymong and say

    “I have never been on this site until now, but it is worse than I could have imagined”.

    No explanation,why ?.

    If you can think of an explanation then your free to let us know,we are also free to let you know,but if Liebour get back in nobody will be free to let anybody know.

  398. 398
    Anonymous says:

    “our soldiers”
    Isn’t that what it says on your birth certificate under the heading father?

  399. 399
    DimEd says:

    True. Very true indeed.
    What he lacked in intellegence, he had in personality and humanity.
    Enter Balls & Co … what he lacks in …… is precisely what Labour needs right now.

  400. 400
    Engineer says:

    “The secret of the National Insurance Fund is….there is no fund!” Ernest Bevin (I think). Same applies to HoC pensions.

  401. 401
    Barnacle Bill says:

    Keel-haul the buggers.

  402. 402
    Dan says:

    Honestly, seriously embarrassing. This is like a bunch of 12 year old girls slagging each other off on Facebook. You should be ashamed.

  403. 403
    Labour Sleaze says:

    This the woman who left her husband over a matter which she said he was innocent of. So why leave then ?
    if I was being uncharitable I would say that this separation of convinience was contrived to circumvent possible action under the proceeds of crime act.

    This is also the woman who recently claimed on Question Time that the deficit was soley due to then Banking collapse.

  404. 404
    chucklenuts says:

    Give it a rest you self righteous cuпt, your type is not missed on here at all.

  405. 405
    Anonymous says:

    Come on Guido

    Tell it like it is. This is just complete shit made up by Coulson. Anyone who thinks you are not his mouthpiece is going to be in no doubt now…

  406. 406
    Snookie says:

    Wait, isn’t Johnson married to Kirsten Imrie?

  407. 407
    Dan says:

    Liebour? Please, are you an adult?

  408. 408
    all over your facebook says:

    You should know all about that Dan you dirty old fucker.

  409. 409
    Anonymous says:

    Grow Up ?

    Have a read at your earlier post – then reflect my friend.

  410. 410
    rEd Millibwand says:

    I have jutht appointed Gordon Brown ath Leader of the Labour party.

  411. 411
    Trafalger says:

    Am I the only one who sees Red Ed as a 7 year old boy in a sleeveless pullover, shorts and a dickie-bow saying “Yes Papa.”

  412. 412
    Down With Brown! says:

    Postie went because he failed to deliver.

  413. 413
    Dan says:

    like I said. Childish.

  414. 414
    Baby P says:

    I’m waiting, in eternity. Are you going to make me wait for an eternity?

  415. 415
    Bill Quango MP says:

    On me Ed son!

  416. 416
    Anonymous says:

    Describes them perfectly Dan, fucking liars the lot of ‘em

  417. 417
    Anotheanonnymouse says:

    At least he’s got something under ‘father’ on his birth certificate – unlike you.

  418. 418
    KINNOCKIO says:

    Its ‘Kinnockio’ actually.

  419. 419
    Engineer says:

    Second class.

  420. 420
    Anonymous says:

    Not while the T*ry wankfest is in hand.

  421. 421
    Bill Quango MP says:

    You paid him?
    Might one ask for exactly which goods or services?

  422. 422
    Labour Sleaze says:

    Was thinking that myself and if it’s the case that a significant other was with him then the leaking of this (cropped?) photo was a warning shot across his bows.

  423. 423
    Dan says:

    I think we all know that you would never call me a self righteous Hunt to my face so why make such a fool of yourself?

  424. 424
    windowlickingood says:

    Dan, please come back one day, you’re so funny.

  425. 425
    QWERTY says:

    Anon, another leftie c u n t. Shouldn’t you be raping an 8 year old boy in some London urinal? That’s what you fuckers normally get up to when not protesting.

  426. 426
    Another Engineer says:

    Clearly you’ve never been there.

  427. 427
    Tom Tomos says:

    How many balls Guido? Clearly the New Year apostrophe lessons haven’t worked.

  428. 428
    Dan says:

    Get a grip.

  429. 429
    AC1 says:

    Have a full refund and fuck the fuck off.

  430. 430
    QWERTY says:

    Dan, Get Aids and die slowly you leftie student scum.

  431. 431
    Anonymous says:

    And yet you voted for a continuation of the charade.
    You can fool some of the people for some of the time.
    Or a lifetime in Engineer’s case.

  432. 432
    jgm2 says:

    Nope. Johnson is definitely quitting. It’s on t’BBC.

  433. 433
    Watcher says:

    Is this the Red Box Blues story, or was that someone else? I always thought Johnson was too nice to be “Nick”.

  434. 434
    QWERTY says:

    Dan so just how many 8 year olds do you fuck a night?

  435. 435
    South of the M4 says:

    Ed has very recently criticised the Brownomics history and been a little off message.
    How do we know that Brown is not behind this? Is Brown, as devious and dangerous and mad as he is, really out of influence?

  436. 436
    chucklenuts says:

    Fuck off cuпt.

  437. 437
    QWERTY says:

    Dan’s probably not a nice set of 8 year old’s buttocks to fondle after he’s had his pot and 2 pints of snakebite in the uni bar.

  438. 438
    AC1 says:

    How’s your blog going?

    Alan Johnson resigning is a bit of a let down for your “never wrong” prediction that he’d be PM. Any comment on that?

  439. 439
    john says:

    who has Johnson been shagging? Is it a woman?

  440. 440
    Anonymous says:

    If i were into raping 8 year old boys, don’t worry, you’d be first on the list.

  441. 441
    Zed says:

    WRONG Decision, Brother.
    After 3 months in the wilderness you could’ve been shaddow chancellor today ..
    But then again your politica skils were always found wanting.
    Until today I wasn’t aware that was a genetic flaw.

  442. 442
    dan the right hand man says:

    I’ll wager you’re getting too much of a grip Dan, you fucking wanker.

  443. 443
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    Why are you so concerned about people growing up ??

    You sound exactly like a grumpy old fart.

  444. 444
    Son of Dan says:

    Unlike you.

  445. 445
    Anonymous says:


    Your creative writing is lovely, dear. B-. I fear that you may have missed my questions again, though. Why did the Tories not win the election (the usual measurement of which is a majority) if they are so wonderful and Labour is so hated? Why are Labour ahead in the polls, now after the country has been able to sample this wonderful government in its full glory for a few months?

    literate pedarist or whoever you are,

    I think you will find that progressive politics is about each taking responsibility for his own and also for others and for the community. I know that from your little Thatcherite perspective where selfishness is the only virtue, that is hard to understand, but try to better yourself for a moment.

    Anyway good luck, girls. I have other things to do.

  446. 446
    AC1 says:

    All British people are evil
    All people who create wealth are the enemy within.
    Extortion is good.
    So is taxation evidenced from the cheers ringing out whenever borrowing or taxes rise.

    Don’t ya just love the Looting party.

  447. 447
    Engineer says:

    Oh dear. TaT’s escaped from his straightjacket again.


  448. 448
    Dan says:

    You cannot possibly believe that, can you? Your comment wasn’t funny, or thought provoking. Just childish. Tou wouldn’t have the courage to call anyone a c u n t to their face so either shut up or please GROW UP

  449. 449
    Anonymous says:

    Dan’s in 3b and someone,s pinched his lunchbox.

  450. 450
    Anonymous says:

    not that – the nonsense about Balls setting it up.

  451. 451
    all over your facebook says:

    Are you trying to groom me you horrible little man?

  452. 452
    Anonymous says:

    Ed Milliband is a dead man walking.
    Balls or his missus will be in charge within a year.

  453. 453
    Anonymous says:


  454. 454
    Guido Fawkes says:

    Please leave Ben Bradshaw out of this
    Thank you

  455. 455
    Have you ever seen that retard in the gimp specs? says:

    Another empty redneck rightwing promise straight from Alaska.

    If Sarah Palin pisses, AC1 feels the benefit of the trickle down effect.

  456. 456
    windowlickingood says:

    You do realise you’re the entertainment for the evening don’t you? We’ve had better to be honest, so expect another booking.

  457. 457
    Zed says:

    Only one bloke making an arse of himself tonight.

    Anyone else spotted Wally on her this evening?

  458. 458
    Mrs Dan says:

    He is a grumpy old fart.

  459. 459
    Ed Balls is a cunt says:

    This site seems to be under attack by Labour trolls. Blinky becoming shadow chancellor has obviously got them worried.

  460. 460
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    What a great time for British politics !
    The Worst bunch of so called tories in history along with the worst ever leader !
    and a Labour party led by a little boy who is just about to be mauled , humiliated and deposed by the nearest thing to Hitler we have seen in 70 years
    The “Ball’s of Balls” to stand on tv and say Johnson will be a great loss to labour by the very bastard who hired the aid to destroy him is unheard of
    It used to be one party exposing the wrong doings of the other
    but how things have changed with the new breed
    once useless Ed has gone it will clear the way for his brothers return so the gang can be complete once more

  461. 461
    Uncomfortably numb says:

    Does anybody on this site give a f*** about how this country is being (miss-)governed, or is is just an opportunity to deliver awfully clever and witty textbites?

  462. 462
    Mrs Dan says:

    FFS Dan take that dildo out of your fucking arse.

  463. 463
    Dack Blog says:

    Some of the papers claiming his wife’s been having an affair with one of their bodyguards.

  464. 464
    jgm2 says:

    Oh do come on. That’s exactly the kind of thing Balls would do. He was Brown’s chief enabler. The idiot behind the Maximum Imbecile. There are reports of him going berserk at Brown when he failed to execute an earlier coup against Blair.

    He tried to replace Darling with himself. The better to deny the deficit.

    Not set up by Balls?

    His Spad not in the frame?

    You should stick to putting up youtube clips – at least there’s the slight possibility you’re trying to bring some political balance. You sound even more desperate and whiny and a Labour apologist when you try arguing.

  465. 465
    Balls for fuhrer says:

    He may still have this one in his cupboard, for Ahem, “special occasions”


  466. 466
    Ed Balls is a cunt says:

    Bad Al and George Gallingway on QT. Puke.

  467. 467
    Engineer says:

    The problem is that given past history, it’s very believable. It’s absolutely in character for Balls and his minions to brief against people. It’s what he does, all the time.

  468. 468
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Martial arts expert Alan Johnson
    decribes what he will do to the bastard who grassed him up

  469. 469
    jgm2 says:

    No. They’re upset that we’re taking the p155 out of Johnson and Balls.

    How very dare we.


  470. 470
    Anonybottom says:

    If……I like it.

  471. 471
    albacore says:

    So poor Al’s out and Big Ed’s in
    Oh deary me, ain’t that a sin?
    And is that petty playground putsch
    Supposed to give us all a rush?
    You want cold shivers down your spine?
    A match and book will work just fine


  472. 472
    Mr. Speaker says:

    Order ! Order ! Stop obsessing about people growing up.

  473. 473
    AC1's press statement as released by Max Clifford says:

    I’ve never delivered a clever or witty post in my life, and i’ve no intention of starting now.

  474. 474
    Anonymous says:

    Exactly what is progressive about a Shadow Cabinet made up almost entirely from a previous Labour government that failed so spectacularly in the election?
    Same old faces, same old tired and discredited policies and still stabbing each other in the back.

  475. 475
    jgm2 says:

    It really is. Balls is the sort who would deliberately feed Johnson a duff line to take or bad figures just to watch him make an arse of himself in public.

  476. 476
    Anonymous says:

    What a pair of utter c’unts. Sucking up to Balls already.

  477. 477
    Doorstep says:

    Big Al on coz it’s from Burnley FFS!

  478. 478
    Ed Balls is a cunt says:

    What the fuck is the chairman of the footballers association doing on QT? He just said Blinky is a man of principle!!! Christ on a fucking moped!

  479. 479
    Tube_Thumber says:

    i thought posties wife was fucking the bodyguard?

  480. 480
    Zed says:

    I note Labour-Rent-A-Crowd have been invited en bloc to Question Time once again..
    So so typical.
    Time to restructure the BBC (when did I hear that last?)
    I despair.

  481. 481
    Penny Dreadful says:

    I’m more useless than you by far.

    Any fat ugly lezzas want a job doing research for f’uck all pay.

  482. 482
    Anonymous says:

    More likely he thought ‘yep, they were right we did fuck everything up’

  483. 483

    The same “sources” that made you think Robert Peston was going to be Miliband’s Political advisor ?


  484. 484
    carry on at your convenience says:

    He’s desperate for cock too, I can recognise the type.

  485. 485
    Ratsniffer says:

    When Balls speaks he always seems to have a slightly smarmy, slightly smug shit eating grin, however serious the subject. He reeks of the playground bully, smiling as he sits across your face and farts.

  486. 486
    Labour Party says:

    we ended boom and bust because we give a f***.

  487. 487
    Postman Prat says:

    You might say that my resignation marks the Last Post…..

  488. 488
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Johnsons final meeting with his economic advisors !

  489. 489
    Anonymous says:

    Where’s the Oil cash stash, Gorgeous George ?

  490. 490
    Ed Ball is a cunt says:

    Bad Al is a truly evil c-unt. Wish he’d just top himself or get cancer.

  491. 491
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    He says there were ‘Extraneous circumstances’ – FFS! Muppet!

  492. 492
    Anonymous says:

    If you vote LibLabCon, you undoubtedly do.

  493. 493
    David Cameron says:

    I love the BBC.

  494. 494
    Ed Ball is a cunt says:

    Iraq now being discussed on QT. Galloway first up. Should be fun when it gets to Bad Al.

  495. 495
    Anonymous says:

    Where’s the WMD Blair ?

  496. 496
    Anonymous says:

    You can always buy some rope at B&Qs

  497. 497
    Anonymous says:

    Milliband will soon find out what it’s like to be stabbed in the back by someone close to you….

  498. 498
    Ed Ball is a cunt says:

    I don’t like Galloway but top marks to him for calling him Goebells on QT!!!!

  499. 499
    Ex Fleet St worker says:

    Who is Clarke Carlisle ?

  500. 500
    Geordie Scoot says:

    You just have to follow the trail of the red rubber bands

  501. 501
    South of the M4 says:

    You are right jg – but probably only after a 5 year stint.

  502. 502
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    Have you ever tried to apply to be in the QT audience ? I did. They want to know everything about you apart from your inside leg measurement. There’s even a little box to fill in about your politics. Insert ‘ Conservative’ and your application is automatically deleted.

  503. 503
    Eeu to me says:

    Evening TwAT.

  504. 504
    Anonymous says:

    Cabinet sources tell me that George Osborne set up Wiliam Hague and David Cameron set up David Laws.

  505. 505
    Lana Turner says:

    The Postman Always Rings Twice….Laura!!

  506. 506
    Nurse Ratched says:

    I’m busy wiping Engineers arse.

    Let the Big Society take care of it.

  507. 507
    Dame Celia Molestrangler says:

    You’re so right, just turned over in disgust, a real left wing self-congratulatory love fest. Who in their right minds would describe Mcavity as an economic heavyweight…. oh yeah, same person who thought postie might be able to tackle the job. Al ja beeba strikes again. FFS, Dave, do something about them!

    Millipede will live to regret Balls. Oh and worse, putting voldemort !the coffers are empty” in charge of work and pensions brief.


  508. 508
    Geordie Scoot says:

    I hear he got to Mount Pleasant

  509. 509
    Jonathon P says:

    Fucking ghastly Balls & his equally loathsome wife have now slithered up to pole position…… Watch out Eddie…..God how I love politics!!

  510. 510
    Joss Stick says:

    As a brain dead voter, what else did you expect?
    Ever heard of tactical lying?

  511. 511
    aChrist says:

    AC on QT looks like he’s got TB

  512. 512
    Geordie Scoot says:

    Divvunt disparage my Steph – she can’t help it if she’s a dorty hooer

  513. 513
    NotASheep says:

    Conspiracy theory of the year so far; but it just might be true!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  514. 514
    Eeu to me says:

    Do the Nuconned us have anybody other than the farmers wife to put on QT,it’s like putting her amongst the sharks,she will be eaten alive ,it requires a NuConned us shark to be around those two..

  515. 515
    Anonybottom says:

    I think we’ve established that the ‘If’ at the beginning of your comment @ 426 was totally superfluous if you’re admitting to being a Labour voter. You’ve helped to shaft a whole generation with £5 trillion of fucking debt. Now crawl away and die.

  516. 516
    "Alan Johnson’s suspected affair with a civil servant was widely rumoured around Westminster" says:

    Yet you hadn’t heard a peep about it or bothered to drop hints here like you did with Hague.

    And you seriously expect people to believe you about “Shadow Cabinet Sources” just because you know the name of Balls SpAd ?

    You’re talking shit.

  517. 517
    Baroness Warsi G String says:

    Oh Johnson take me up the chutney

  518. 518
    Anonymous says:


  519. 519
    no longer anonymous says:

    But who revealed the info on the wife and bodyguard?

  520. 520
    jgm2 says:

    Go on. Post a youtube clip of Hague ‘for balance’.

    God you’re really rattled tonight.

  521. 521
    Anonymous says:

    “tens of hundreds of thousands”

  522. 522
    Carleone says:

    Possibly an import from one of NooYuk Five families

  523. 523
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    No. My name’s not Tony B£iar.

  524. 524
    jgm2 says:

    Hohohoho. That’s more like it.

    Go on, post that Youtube clip of Hague. For balance.


    Rattled doesn’t begin to describe you.

  525. 525
    R Swipping says:

    You’re either in front, or bringing up the party rear.

  526. 526
    Zed says:

    Yes I did. I was rejected too. You are so right.
    Listen to the hand-clapping and you have the answer week after week.

  527. 527
    A Burnley Fan says:

    Campbell is a fucking lying shit stain with blood on his hands. Nobody I know can stand the arse wipe.

  528. 528
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Fucking lung cancer I hope

  529. 529
    Pendle new gay mp says:

    I love you Johnson

  530. 530
    Anonymous says:

    Or both

  531. 531
    Postman Prat says:

    Fifteen ?

  532. 532
    Lana Turner says:

    Did he use the red rubbers!

  533. 533
    Crazy Diamond says:

    Both, I’d say.

  534. 534
    Lord Fondlebum says:

    It’s me – she just looks so much like a boy I couldn’t help myself.

    First time up the batty as well

  535. 535
    jgm2 says:

    I hope he was a T*ry bodyguard.

    Make a change from us being fucked by Labour.

  536. 536
    R Swipping says:

    With Anonybottom’s devasting insight in unmasking hopelessly partisan Labour trolls, what future is there left for the anarchists?

  537. 537
    jgm3 says:

    Guido lied about Lord Taylor because there are no Tory expenses piggies.


  538. 538
    Lord Wayne of Trombone and Other Instruments says:

    All in all – most of the young chaps putting posts up here on this blogette,
    are by n large,

    please do not reply with rude comments implying I am a twat etc

  539. 539
    East Midlander says:

    Good for Mr Dale. He and Guido could form a pincer movement

  540. 540
    the next Mr Katona says:

    It’s actually quite scary to think that the fucking arseholes in parliament, from all parties, are apparently the “best” we have got to do the job ?

    It’s no wonder Baroness Warsi feels she can stand up and shit all over the British people without facing any real punishment.

    We are fucked.

  541. 541
    Geordie Scoot says:

    If they were all competent life would be very dull. I personally will vote anyone with serious personality defects, a dodgy past, financial irregularities and a propensity to copulate with the nearest thing with a pulse, provided they make ridiculous and unsustainable promises after my self-interest.

  542. 542
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    They are actually clapping Campbell! Clapping the c’unt!

    What sort of brain dead socialist fodder are they?

  543. 543
    Female beards says:

    Watching question time in HD is OK but seeing Caroline Spelman’s facial hair in its full glory is gross. Though surely the BBC lighting techs must be aware of this?

  544. 544
    Zed says:


    She IS being eaten alive.

    By the audience too. She is out of her depth, that’s why she was invited I’d guess.

  545. 545
    South of the M4 says:

    Not convinced. Johnson was popular but off message with the ‘sons & daughters of Brown and Unions ‘. Johnson was deliberately promoted to shadow chancellor knowing that he would be out of his depth. The affair rumours having been ‘held in stock ‘ for some time. They are in opposition, they have time to play the long game. Getting rid of Johnson has been a deliberate strategy to strengthen the non-blairite
    faction. Now they have their moment. It’s hard left from now on in.

  546. 546
    Mike Hunt says:

    Making love to
    The Mersey Tunnel
    With a Sausage
    Have you ever been to Liverpool

  547. 547
    R Swipping says:

    When it comes to the subject of pissing into the wind, no one can hold a candle to jgm2.

  548. 548
    jgm2 says:


    Even though you’re a great big Labour apologist button and I was confident I’d totally fucked with your mind (Psychology not being a proper science and all) I wasn’t certain until you posted that.


    Do the Hague Youtube clip. For balance.

    Go on. You know you want to.


  549. 549
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    It’s better than Galloway’s twatish face rug.

  550. 550
    East Midlander says:

    No your not at £1,000 a day. (Suggested fee)

  551. 551
    AC1 says:

    Where’……s the blog?
    Where’s the blog? Where’s the blog?
    Where’s the blog? Where’s the blog? Where’……s the blo-o-og?
    Where’s the blog? Where’s the blog? Where’s the blog?
    Where’……s the blo-o-og? Where’s the blog!?

  552. 552
    jgm3 says:

    I love Dave and his close friend Baroness Warsi. No wonder I’m his obedient little doggie and arselicker when he talks such sense as this.


  553. 553
    Mike Hunt says:

    And the 28 day limit for terrorists is STILL in force until Monday, what timing.

  554. 554
    jgm3 says:



  555. 555
    Anonymous says:

    Will end up in the hand of private Cooooooompanies.

  556. 556
    jgm2 says:

    It’s Barnsley. They vote Labour. Because their dad’s did.

  557. 557
    Anonymous says:

    The earlier the NHS is privatised the better for all of our people.


  558. 558
    ACI says:

    Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!! Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!Tat TAT!! tatty tat TAT TAT TAAAATT!! TAT! tat! TAAAAT! TAT!!

  559. 559
    R Swipping says:

    As an honest politician, she is so obviously out of her depth.

  560. 560
    Dick Scratcher says:

  561. 561
    Mike Hunt says:

    And opposition for the rest of their pointless lives.

    There are times when there could almost be a God.

  562. 562
    David Cameron says:

    jgm2 is a Ghastly Piece of Filth like Nick Griffin.


  563. 563
    Hagues friend Dorothy says:

    Ahh welcome to the club you can be my pps

  564. 564
    Time for the truth says:

    What a truly horrible bunch of evil bastard Marxist scum – if they will do this to each other what chance do the British people have? they would rape and sell their granny for political advantage.

    Well Gordon I have to hand it to you, you have managed to breed a festering nest of evil who will spawn and attract others like them, keeping all of good intent away – nothing but the cold light of exposure on this lot will do.

  565. 565
    expat twat says:

    Hear! Hear!

  566. 566
    The BBC should be put down says:

    Fucking fucking Hell. I have not seen Question Time in years and now I know why.

    The BBC selects an Audience of leftist dullards and feeds them with leftist shite.

  567. 567
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    When are they going to do a QT from somewhere civilised?

    It’s always these shit holes full of students or Labour donkeys.

  568. 568
    R Swipping says:

    The T*ry voters are beginning to understand how B&P voters feel.

  569. 569
    Zed says:

    “We’ll take one more question from the woman on the far left”

    How ironic.

    You take most questions from the people from the far left Mr D.

  570. 570
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    O/T – perhaps Baroness Whoresi could look into this sort of shit before accusing the rest of us of bigotry


  571. 571
    JUST ASKIN says:


  572. 572
    I've ate balls says:

    ANAGRAM of Alastair Campbell: A baptismal recall

  573. 573
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Claps all round for Al Campbell (shudder)

  574. 574
    Misterned says:

    You are a twat etc.

  575. 575
    Capt. Birdseye says:

    You have never visited Hull ? They all smell of fish.

  576. 576
    QWERTY says:

    So it’s Alan Johnson’s wife doing the shagging on the side is it?

  577. 577
    jgm3 says:

    I love Tony Blair

  578. 578
    R Swipping says:

    As long as they get satisfaction for their £142.50, who cares?

  579. 579
    Nigel Evans Teabagging Partner says:

    Get a room you too

  580. 580
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    shouldn’t you be in bed wanking?

  581. 581
    Anonymous says:

    What’s Simon Hughes excuse ?
    He votes Labour because …. (answers in less than 400 words)
    He’ll choose his moment when the ConDem alliance is having problems then he’ll defect with his incompetent pal Cable.

  582. 582
    Suise says:

    Tess you should have said ‘psycho’ not typo.

    Men who call women dirty whores to score a point have serious psycho/secual problems.

  583. 583
    Suise says:

    Tess you should have said ‘psycho’ not typo.

    Men who call women dirty whores to score a point have serious psycho/sexual problems.

  584. 584
    jon featherman says:

    As it is the wife and the bodyguard – is the title of this thread just rubbish – polite word

  585. 585
    Anonymous says:

    Apparently, it’s the only action your wife gets.

  586. 586
    Senile Tory Twat says:

    I wank furiously to pictures of Dave and Tony because I’m their little doggie.

  587. 587
    jgm2 says:


    ‘Conservative deputy chairman Michael Fallon said: “Alan Johnson is a good man and I wish him well. But what really beggars belief is the appointment of Ed Balls…

    “He was Gordon Brown’s first lieutenant… [They] brought the government to the brink of bankruptcy.“‘

    Get used to it Labour bed-wetters. You’re going to be hearing that for the next fifteen years. Or until Balls gets sacked.


  588. 588
    jgm3 says:

    I love you Warsi.


  589. 589
    The Pendle pansie boy says:

    Hague is felching her Chutney

  590. 590
    Anonymous says:

    You hold them in far greater esteem then I do.

  591. 591
    jgm2 says:


    ‘Conservative deputy chairman Michael Fallon said: “Alan Johnson is a good man and I wish him well. But what really beggars belief is the appointment of Ed Balls…

    “He was Gordon Brown’s first lieutenant… [They] brought the government to the brink of b*nk*u*t*y.“‘

    Get used to it Labour bed-wetters. You’re going to be hearing that for the next fifteen years. Or until Balls gets sacked.


  592. 592
    Herr E. Nutz says:

    Votch zis space.

  593. 593
    AC1 says:

    QT is pure Labour party astroturfing.

    Can only happen thanks to the “unique” way AlJaBeebya is funded (threats).

  594. 594
    Suise says:

    They may even splash out on a few lampshades.

  595. 595
    Anonymous says:

    Fuck off you sad muppet.

  596. 596
    AC1 says:

    Don’t forget the Charity donations that vanished.

  597. 597
    Anonymous says:


  598. 598
    Anonymous says:

    Guido, as I have always suspected you’re a chancer who actually knows fuck all, you have no insider information and took a wild stab in the dark. So much for your ‘sources’ and ‘widely rumoured affair.’

    You’ve made yourself look a right clown (and not for the first time!)

  599. 599
    Buggins says:

    Young innocent numpties.
    Just what are they like?

    Read your history books, Sonny.

  600. 600
    David Cameron says:

    I support Baroness Warsi 100%.

  601. 601
    Anonymous says:

    CRINNGGEEE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    You can put a man in a suit, but ..

  602. 602
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    To quote the Great Balls “So weak”

  603. 603
    Coco says:

    You should have seen him at the wheel after a skinful.

  604. 604
    Beyond ridiculous says:

    I just can not believe the impartiality of this week’s QT. Spelman is the only person representing the left and the Chair will not allow her to speak.

  605. 605

    I was a teenager once you know

  606. 606
    Dave "Rocky" Cameron says:

    Let him without sin cast the first stone.

  607. 607
    LAB 43%, CON 36%, LDEM 10%, says:

    oh dear!

  608. 608
    Anonymous says:

    and they might do a better fucking job of it.

  609. 609
    AC1 says:

    Sorry, I just cant compete with the wit and cleverness of your blog.

    Just where is it?

  610. 610
    Beyond ridiculous says:

    Of course I meant partiality.

  611. 611
    Nick Clegg says:

    I pledge to be Leader for 5 more years and keep Dave in power.

    I pledge to win the AV vote like I won Oldham!

    Where has my Party gone ???

  612. 612
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    QT next venues:

    Cambridge (audience packed with lefty students)

    Workington (audience packed with Labour donkeys)

    Plus ca change.

  613. 613
    Suise says:

    Stupid little shit too. He’s unbearable and Labour have dumped the one personable member of the shadow cabinet. Disaster.

  614. 614
    Barnsley massif - postal voting division says:

    He may be a wicked and malicious c*unt who helped rig the evidence to justify a war in Iraq resulting in hundreds of thousands of deaths and drive a brave public servant to suicide just so his wife would get a pension.

    But he’s one of us and his hearts in the right place.

  615. 615
    AC1 says:

    That’s basically what Ball’s “lecturer” told an acquaintance.

  616. 616
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Last week, John Redwood was interviewed about his criticism of the B of E’s MPC. The BBC’s studio lighting appeared to give him a toothbrush moustache.

  617. 617
    expat twat says:

    It’s a disgrace.

  618. 618
    Barnsley massif - postal voting division says:

    e may be a wicked and malicious c*unt who helped rig the evidence to justify a war in Iraq resulting in hundreds of thousands of deaths and dr*ve a brave public servant to suicide just so his wife would get a pension.

    But he’s one of us and his hearts in the right place.

  619. 619
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    And now MARK FUCKING STEEL is on This Week.

    I have to shoot the telly now.

  620. 620
    Capt. Birdseye says:

    Mum Mum, Every one is calling your little Dan a bastard, SON you are don’t tell your father

  621. 621
    Poor sod says:

    Johnson’s wife’s affair with his bodyguard: Marital turmoil forced Shadow Chancellor to quit


  622. 622
    Suise says:

    You’re spot on.

    Ed ‘blackmail’ Balls. Even after Damien McB he hasn’t changed his spots.

  623. 623
    Yawn says:

    Troll. Spotted. Boring.

  624. 624
    friendly hangman says:

    I’d bend her over and give her one up either hole or one after the other

  625. 625
    Got the T shirt says:

    So why did he resign? He ain’t done nothing wrong

  626. 626
    Alan Johnson says:

    My job! Why!? Why did I have to lose my job! Why!? *sob*

  627. 627
    David Miliband says:

    My brother’s an utter backstabbing c*unt. Weren’t you paying attention?

  628. 628
  629. 629
    Richard from Warks says:

    Jaquie Smith looking hot, hot, hot, on this week, in a strict governess type of way.
    Surely she deserves greater exposure.

  630. 630
    jgm2 says:

    Mr Rice is ‘protecting’ Theresa May. Wonder how he copes with those weird space suits and leopard print boots.

  631. 631
    Dack Blog says:

    So have they both been having an affair or has Guido been sold a pup? Are we in front of him and he’s behind?

  632. 632
    David Miliband says:

    I already know. You mean the other Miliband.

  633. 633
    Anonymous says:

    With Fiona, the old blond tart.
    And Jaquie Smith.
    And Portillo.
    And Brillo.

    Who needs cheap pornstars?

  634. 634
    Brown Broadcasting Company says:

    Fiona Phillips (Liebour Supporter) on Brillo slating the government rather than being objective on her presentation. WTF!

    Timney’s Tits next to Portillo on the sofa.

  635. 635
    Eeu to me says:

    Exposure to microwave radiation,maybe swine flu.

  636. 636
    Durrrrrrrrr! says:

    Wait a few days for events to trickle through, dullard.

  637. 637
    Dack Blog says:

    Maybe he’s upset, d’ya think? And suddenly a job his heart wasn’t in (as caretaker) suddenly mattered even less?

  638. 638
    Suise says:

    Because of the constituency boundaries which are all about to change and there’s fa Labour can do to stop the Conservatives levelling the playing field.

    FACT: If Labour had had the same 10.7 million votes cast for the Conservatives, they’d be back in power with a comfortable majority…

  639. 639
    Herman van Rumpypumpy, ruler of Britain says:

    Das ist meinen linen, schweinhund.

  640. 640
  641. 641
    Susie says:

    Can’t we just refer to them as a sort of collective noun from now on? Eds Miliballs or sommat…

  642. 642
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    She’s getting ‘over exited’.

    ‘My GP seeing pound signs over my head’ – stupid bint.

    Looks like a dog. Afghan hound possibly.

  643. 643
    jgm2 says:

    He’s going to need that ministerial cash to keep her in the manner to which she’s become accustomed.

    And not having his heart in the job didn’t stop him from being a crap Health Secretary and Home Secretary. But, to be fair to the Labour-economy-destroying enabler and deficit denier, I s’pose he must be a bit upset if his missus has gone off piste like that.

  644. 644
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Gamma rays

  645. 645
    Susie says:

    Neutron bomb: kills all the people but leaves buildings intact.

  646. 646
    Lord Carrington's binoculars says:

    Johnson at it himself. Was widely discussed last year. The Sundays will get him.

    The wife’s story will probably bring Johnson’s affair out of the closet.

  647. 647
    A Labour Party History Book says:

    The British Empire was evil and hated throughout the world, until Chez Guevara, Joe Stalin and Polly Toynbee created a carbon-neutral zero-emission global socialist utopia in which no-one wanted for anything and everyone was happy.

    There was a brief hiccup in 2010-2011 when the Tory-led government ruined all of Glorious Labour’s astonishing successes, but it was dealt with swiftly.

    As told by Mad Hattie Harman’s Curiously Cavernous Front Bottom, and believed by no-one.

  648. 648
    Anonymous says:

    Nye Bevan actually

  649. 649
  650. 650
    Anonymous says:

    What kind of dog are you can I ask?

  651. 651
    PC Plod says:

    Erm.. you can still trust us.


  652. 652
    Susie says:

    But Sarah Palin might.

  653. 653
    Epic Fail says:

    She has to at least try to look hot to compete with all her husband’s p*orn videos.

  654. 654
    Anonymous says:

    Perhaps you have the wrong story Guido…… it’s the wife, not Johnson…..

  655. 655
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Portillo on TW:

    Balls is unsackable and has absolute power in the Labour Party.

    Spot on analysis.

  656. 656
    East Midlander says:

    Not him, his Met bodyguard has been suspended because of allegations of an affair with Mrs Johnson

  657. 657
    Zed says:


    Her and her husband rake tens of millions in … then she complains her kids are treated to 5th choice comprehensive school !

    Look this cow up on Wiki to see the truth about her constant socialist bleating about “I feel your pain”.

    Labour Hypocrite at the very top level.

    What a spoilt disgusting bint.

  658. 658
    PC Plod says:

    Don’t blame the Milimongs, it was Balls what shafted you.

  659. 659
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Ha ha! Very good.

  660. 660
    Bri says:

    Is it all part of the naughty schoolboys plot, if he can bring balls into line he can lead the next government

  661. 661
    jgm2 says:

    Ohhhh. It’s like the Mad Nad’s situation? The man she’s fucking has dumped his missus ‘cos she’s an alki. Poor fella. Has to get his plums drained by the font of Christian kindness, Nadine cos the ex spends all her time dr*nk*ing.

    Get your excuses in first sort of approach?

    Ooooh. That’ll come back to bite him if that’s the case.

  662. 662
    Dack Blog says:

    Were you undercover?

  663. 663
    Susie says:

    What was that about the Labour leaker on ‘two Shadow Cabinet ministers’ being involved in expense fiddles last week? We can only hope… Magda and Joe?

  664. 664
    Ken Clarke, the criminal's friend says:

    That sounds a bit violent. Let’s hold a team meeting and drive forward the rehabilitation experience.

  665. 665
    Ken Clarke, the criminal's friend says:

    Modded? No way!

  666. 666
    Dack Blog says:

    One cuckold too far.

  667. 667
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    The sort that eats little Labour wankers for din dins. Woof!

  668. 668
    Susie says:

    Well it does rhyme with dull. There’s a clue.

  669. 669

    So Mrs Johnson was doing the horizontal boogie with her husbands bodyguard, according to The Daily Mail, whilst the husband Alan Johnson was having it away with a Civil Servant. BUT should the Bodyguard not be guarding ‘the body’ so to speak so how can he be in two places at the same time? Answers on the back of a £5 white note. WE would dearly love to see:
    1. The Bodyguards Timesheet and Expenses Claimed.
    2. Alan Johnsons Hotel Expenses.
    3. MPs’ Expenses
    4. Mrs Johnsons Expenses

  670. 670
    The Doctor. says:

    I wish Guido would be straight on with the stories here. First the innuendo of being outed implies that Alan is Gay. Instead of being so hush hush and secretive, either state “Johnson Gay Affair” or like the Mail have done “Johnson wife Affair”. Your losing my respect and interest now Guido. This IMO is another example of your insider knowledge falling flat on its arse.

  671. 671
    MB. says:

    I was watching Red Ed on the news making his statement earlier. Why does he speak out of the side of his mouth, it is rather like watching someone who has had a stroke.

  672. 672
    Zed says:

    She’s certainly becoming more attractive … I can see the marks on her face (which seems to be sitting upon a pile of pancakes) which suggest the bargepoles are now actually touching her.

  673. 673
    jgm2 says:

    Does this mean Hague isn’t gay then?

  674. 674
    straw man dum dum says:

    dats funneee coz dey is all commeenazi’s innits ?!? fuud gows in mowth ?!?

  675. 675
    Susie says:

    And got a secret crush on Warsi which he’s ashamed of because she’s a Tory.

  676. 676
    jgm2 says:

    Her and her husband rake tens of millions in … then she complains her kids are treated to 5th choice comprehensive school !

    She should move to Diane Abbott’s constituency. The state schools there are now so good that if her only son wasn’t already grown up and out of (private) school she’d be delighted to send him there. So she would. Honest.

  677. 677
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Collect your refund from the ticket kiosk in the foyer.

  678. 678
    Kim Jong Broon says:

    I’m so wonley

  679. 679
    Susie says:

    Get a gimp Dan.

  680. 680
    jgm2 says:

    Go on. Give us the Youtube clip of Hague.


  681. 681
    Senile Tory Twat says:

    I’m have stewed prunes for din dins again my care home nursie tells me, as long as I don’t shit myself again. Woof! Woof!
    The Alzheimers kicking in again. Woof! Woof!

  682. 682
    jgm2 says:

    Come on. Hague. Youtube. Obey your programming.


  683. 683
    Mad Nads says:

    I charged the taxpayer for my bar room tabs so I was the Alki in that affair. As God told me the other day, though shalt not commit adultery.

  684. 684
  685. 685
    Susie says:

    I’m surprised they turn up at all…

    Their kids are probably being gang raped by M•sims in mummy’s bed while she’s on the telly…

  686. 686
    David Camoron says:

    I’m standing behind Warsi 100% even if my Lib dem friends and that Ghastly Piece of Filth Nick Griffin don’t like her.


  687. 687
    Anonymous says:

    No fucker reads The Times though. They’ve paywallee themselves out of existence (and influence). Ergo: no-one gives a shit about what is on The Times’ front page.

  688. 688
    Norris Stampton says:

    No, we all think that – though seven years old is giving him more maturity than he deserves…

  689. 689
    Susie says:

    David Cameron needs a spine doctor.

  690. 690
    Anonymous says:

    You sad, sad people. I’ve never felt so low about the state of our once great nation. People posting on this site are so full of hate and bile.

    Please sit quietly alone, and think about your own miserable lives that drives the hatred inside you.

    I pity you all

  691. 691
    Susie says:

    And if they’re somewhere where leftist dullards are thin on the ground, they bring their own in a coach.

  692. 692
    jgm2 is William Hague's next Spad says:

    You sound disappointed because you wanted to move inside Hagues arsehole if you ever got too ashamed of living inside Cameron’s ringpiece.


  693. 693
    Anonymous says:

    If as alleged above it was Alex Belardinelli who spilled the beans, in order to suck up to Balls, then Alex Belardinelli is an utter, utter Hunt.

  694. 694
    Susie says:

    Did you notice when Campbell and Galloway got into a sort of feeding frenzy, but Spellman was saying her piece quite successfully, how Dims immediately jumped in and interrupted her again?

    He really sucks.

  695. 695
    The Doctor. says:

    If Guido gets his “facts” wrong, then he is off the radar IMO. You “Old Tory Bigot” remind me of a caricature of Beavis and Butthead. Oh look “Alan is GAY, tug tug tug, moan moan moan”. Life is too short to trawl the net of non news sites; There is a good site out there: “Climate Change is caused by Wanking”, google it, its right up your street.

  696. 696
    Norris Stampton says:

    If we are lucky!

  697. 697
    Norris Stampton says:

    Only in the Readers Wives rejects section…

  698. 698
    Iron D. says:

    Ha ha! Very good. I see you are taking the piss out of toryboys who parrot witless stereotypes because they are too thick to have a brain of their own. You should have added Marx to make it really realistic though.
    Always remember just how stupid they are.

  699. 699
    Susie says:

    Cambridge City is a small yellow dot in the deep Blue Tory sea of East Anglia. That’s why the BBC always have to go back there and be able to say that QT covers every region of the UK.

  700. 700
    ROFL! says:

    You mean VAT, inflation, unemployment or the NHS?

    Because the public really gives a shit about shadow chancellors don’t they?


  701. 701
    Cherie Blair QVC says:

    Go and suck some hard cock you arsehole gobshyte

  702. 702
    AC1 says:

    I’ve told you before that looking in the mirror is bad for your sense of self-esteem.

  703. 703
    Fat Ugly Lezza says:

    Oh, g’wan chick. After all, according to your tweets, you “moisten” at the very thought of hairy paunches. I’ve got a hairy paunch.

    Anyway, this job. Fcuk the minimum wage, what I wanna know is how you going to pay the travel? I live in Leicester, I can do your “research” on t’internet from my house, but you want me to interview single mother slags. There’s loads in Leicester, but you want me to go around the country for no dibs? Hows that gonna work?

  704. 704
    Cherie Blair QVC says:

    About that Treasury book you authored in 2002, there didn’t seem to be any mention of the possibility of a downturn in your plans for endlessly growing public spending.

    Tories are gonna rip you a new arsehole

  705. 705
    Dino. says:


  706. 706
    jgm 2 says:


  707. 707
  708. 708
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Oh yes you’ve got me bang to rights Doc. Eh?

    You obviously know what I think about any subject.

    I actually don’t think “Alan is GAY”. Who the fuck brought that up?

    Also I think climate change is a real concern.

    Take the mote out of your own eye dear doctor.

  709. 709
    Calamity Clegg says:

    I pledge to be Chancellor in a few months as Guido has sources inside the Cabinet that confirm it.

  710. 710
    Milliepeed Minor says:

    Please remember to watch our former greatest leader President Bliar later today, with his session at the Chilcot enquirey, and its very pleasing to note that Chilcot cannot get enough of our former greatest leader & have pleaded with him to return for a second glorious time, hopefully all day

    Our Greatest Leader will no doubt evade answering any question directly, and quite rightly he has no need to give any truthful answers or infromation at all. That is not in his nature plus his wonderful wife Cherie wont allow it.

    The british tax payers should be thanked for providing all of the thousands of extra Police as security to restrain his adoring British Public who just wish to shower the greatest Leader with there adoring best wishes, when he arrives & when he leaves.

    Most go need as I need to finish my detention by writing out 500 times “why the fcuk did I make that tosser Johnson the Shadow Chancellor” And give them to my New Head Mr Balls without delay !

  711. 711
    Please take your seats - the show is about to begin says:

    Oh this is going to be fun! Every time Balls opens his mouth Osborne will be there, I trust, ready willing and able to remind him of Labour’s latest economic fuck-up

  712. 712
    Hamish MacTabbish says:

    climate change could be eradicated if all the ultra uber green Nazis just terminated themselves. Lots less hot air. And no more BBC Whoopee!
    Just a thought!

  713. 713
    David Camermong says:

    I supported Blair and the Iraq war and I still support Blair on the Iraq War.

    Afghanistan is going well isn’t it ?

  714. 714
    Osborne's Anal Beads says:

  715. 715
    short term memory loss wanker says:

    Durrrrrrrr Who was at the helm of the Exchequer with Gordon Brorown swigging champers with the bankers once a month over dinner?
    We really do give a shit about who is shadow Chancellor, particularly one who was so drubbed at his own seat that he had to launch his leadership campaign in a constituency 70 miles away from his own in he was unfortunate enough to bump into one of his electorate. Balls had over 90 per cent shaved off his majority in one swoop!
    we will watch this tw@t with interest

  716. 716
    William Gaygue says:


    FFS you couln’t make this up. If ever proof was needed of a party devoid of talent or direction we see it here and now. Warsi is the Party Chairman. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

    This is better than the Tories under IDS or me, this is comedy genious.

    Conservatives the gift that keeps giving: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

  717. 717
    WRONG! says:

    No he wasn’t. He said it would be Vince Cable and gave him the crosshairs.

    Why don’t you answer the question about why Fawkes hadn’t a clue about Johnson going ?

  718. 718
    David Cameron says:

    I love the BBC and Al Gore.

  719. 719
    He loves Dubya and Palin says:

    said the septic simpleton

  720. 720
    Windowlicker Fury says:

    Nailed them. LOL!

  721. 721
    You brute! says:

    Alan Johnson’s former personal security officer is to be suspended for porking his missus!

  722. 722
    jgm2 is Cameron's little doggie says:

    Dave’s little doggie is getting angry. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!


  723. 723
    short term memory loss wanker says:

    No he can’t.

  724. 724
    short term memory loss wanker says:

    Suspended on grounds of taste, perhaps?

  725. 725

    It’s complete horseshit.

    Only a trio of paranoid wankers like you could possibly believe that someone who didn’t have the slightest idea Johnson was going now has un-named “sources” [yeah, right LOL!] telling him Balls somehow set the whole thing up, including a marriage breakdown, with the Sunday Times.

    Desperate, desperate stuff.

  726. 726
    The deranged mong who always posts Topboy's had enough of Guido rimming etc etc says:

    It had been nice here the last few days without your insane rants. Looks like your occasional sudden absences are because you’ve been sectioned. And now you’re back to say tat, wuv, winkie, lickspittle and Yap! Yap! Yap! again.

  727. 727
    ROFL! says:

    And the public never stops talking about Brown these days do they? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!

    Why didn’t Obama mention Bush in the midterms ?

    When you muster sufficient brainpower to work out the reason and why Cameron can’t fight the last election again, get back to us you fuckwitted simpleton.

  728. 728
    ROFL! says:

    Dave’s little poodle is going to cwy!! Awww…….



  729. 729

    So Tessa is a man?

    I think ol Tess was paraphrasing Muslim men in how they address any brazen woman who shows an ankle.

  730. 730
    The deranged mong who always posts Topboy's had enough of Guido rimming etc etc says:

    Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap! Yap!

  731. 731
    The big D says:

    Nice play out at the end of This Week. The speaker walking through parliament to the song Big Bad John by Jimmy Dean.

  732. 732

    For the same reason Blair gave Brown the job. To keep him on the inside where he could keep an eye on him and not make trouble.

    Didn’t quite work to plan though.

    Knobjockeys the lot of them!

  733. 733
    Utter desperation says:

    with the hot air coming from her, flaps open

  734. 734
    Johnson largess says:

    I hate Al Gore and the BBC and th IPCc and the removal of the words man made from Gllobal Warming Arguments, though I do like the ter Anthropomorthic instead of ‘man made’, tha should sort out the thickies

  735. 735
    Johnson largess says:

    bugger predictive texyting!

  736. 736
    Marshmyst says:

    Behind the curtains

  737. 737
    Zzzzz says:

    Fuck off Tat

  738. 738
    tattyboy the battyboy says:

    Alan Johnson will be PM!!!


  739. 739
    Johnson largess says:

    ROFL: You’re the fuck witted simpleton, I bet your voting slips have that printed on them

  740. 740
    ROFL! says:

    Poor tat thought the Postie would be PM.

    Awww….. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

    You fucking retard

  741. 741
    You assume... says:

    You’re assuming Ed Scrotum deserves a shadow posting?; he doesn’t even deserve a severance package.
    his hypocrisy is everywhere – just YouTube his speeches and you can see him flip and flop from one standpoint to an opposing standpoint.
    Google him if you have to; the ‘man’ is an utter self-serving fraud.

  742. 742
    Bastardo says:

    Tell us about Mrs. J

  743. 743
    Duuurrrr! Rofl's grammatical cousin. says:

    Touched a nerve? That happens when you think money grows on trees you tw&t

  744. 744
    Milliepeed Minor says:

    David C …….Our Greatest President is a much bigger fish…..your still a wet

    but not at wet as me…….so wait your turn inline

  745. 745
    Milliepeed Minor says:

    Ooops cant stop here any longer just learnt my new head teacher, nasty Mr Balls is on his way back………and I’ve still not finished writing out of of my lines he set…..I must try very hard not to upset him as he does get very angry, especially when asked about the total Balls Up’s of the last 13 years…….he say’s he never made any so it must be true……& hopes now Gordon will soon be welcomed back to the front (park) bench in the near future…..

    Oh goody ………..better were all Red than another Ed….and we make a nice big daisy chain all getting a big golden rivet each….

  746. 746
    Anonymous says:

    Guido appears to have got his facts badly wrong here. If AJ decides to act on the version of this story first published Guido could be looking at a serious claim for defamation.

  747. 747
    Dr. Who says:

    As a Time lord I have come here to warn you against Voting in Labour again – I have been to the future, I know the awful future you have created by trusting Labour again.

    In that future Ed Balls deposes Red Ed and Balls ends up as an unelected P.M. he then recalls Gordon Brown as his chancellor who in turn deposes Ed Balls and once again Gordon Brown ends up as an unelected PM.

    You have been warned – never ever trust Labour again

  748. 748
    terrace bar says:

    We now know Mrs J was enjoying her pork sausage, but that does not change whether Mr J was doing similar or not.

    Guido may be right. We shall see.

    The fact she was doing it may mean they had a Shane-Warne like arrangement, who knows.

  749. 749
    Last to the story, all wrong on the facts, it's a complete Fawkes Up ! says:

    “Alan Johnson’s suspected affair with a civil servant was widely rumoured around Westminster, it was the reason that people believed that he had not run for leader. The story was kept out of the papers – until now.”

    Alan Johnson quit frontline politics after his wife was alleged to have had an affair with his police bodyguard

  750. 750
    lolol says:

    who knows ? sources tell me that William Hague’s wife was having an affair with his SpAd! er… is this right ??? who knows!

  751. 751
    David Cameron says:

    Ghastly Piece of Filth.

  752. 752
    it's all a load of rubbish says:

    You mean Fawkes has just been caught red-handed inventing a string of lies ?

  753. 753
    rich Johnson says:

    Who looks the C@nt now?

  754. 754
    Dr.XYZ says:

    I’ll never trust the Conservatives again

  755. 755
    It'sAlreadyTooLate says:

    Put everything in your wifes name Guido, I see court action in your future.

  756. 756
    Ed Bollokov ( Son of Brown, Deficit-Admirer-in Chief ) says:

    WOOOHOOOOO !!! When can I get my hands on the Nation’s cheque book again !!!

    I’ll also abolish Boom and Bust…….again

  757. 757
    William says:

    “he doesn’t even deserve a severance package.”

    He does, just between his chin and his shoulders.

  758. 758
    Red Ed & Head Ed says:

    We’re already taking orders from Gordon and Kinnockio.

  759. 759
    Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? says:

    Can’t see why just THIS matter over his wife would cause resignation of him from Shadow Cabinet in the way it was done which seemed rather hurried with perfunctory reasons given…there must be more to it and rest assured the hacks will be on the case… I expect to read some sordid tales in the Sundays which may shed some further light on the reason for Johnson’s hurried departure(that and the fact he hadn’t a clue about economics of course but then again neither had Brown and he was still Chancellor for 10 years)

  760. 760
    Guido McBride says:

    Or at the very least… constant ridicule.

    He obviously made this shit up thinking he would sound like he still had some inside knowledge of Westminster.
    Instead, now the truth is out, he comes across as a Coulson stooge inventing any old bullshit on the spur of the moment to try and discredit his Conservative paymasters enemies.

    In short.. he IS now Damian McBride.

  761. 761
    Guido's whole story is full of shit says:

    The bodyguard’s been referred for an official investigation by the police.

    You think they are doing that for a fucking laugh ?

    The wife was having an affair.
    Guido was wrong and making up any old nonsense.
    Deal with it.

  762. 762
    Seymour says:

    Ed Milli takes Johnson out and tucks in two balls

  763. 763
    looters/socialshits says:

    She is an animated Picture of Dorian Grey – hideously ugly corruption has eaten her alive.

  764. 764
    Gordon Brown c/o HMP Broadmore says:

    I will be back. My cabinet is in place. Only I can save the country. Yvette always liked to watch me play with Balls.

  765. 765
    looters/socialshits says:

    Impartiality is in our DNA.

  766. 766
    Gideon Osboobery (Keeping VAt, inflation and unemployment up) says:

    BOOO HOOO HOOO!!!! Can you add up my expenses for me please ?? The sums are too hard for me.

    I’m going to abolish Bailing out the Irish bankers with £7 BILLION of British taxpayers money……again……after all the other Euro Bailouts planned this year.

  767. 767
    Dave's first Love Barack Obama says:

    Shouting George Bush every five minutes certainly helped me win the midterms.

  768. 768
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Johnson could have done a Tessa, separated, walked out on his spouse, and kept his political career. If Red Ed wanted him to stay on, that option could have been followed.

    Can’t think of many front line politicians who have had marital difficulties resigning cos the wife was unfaithful.

  769. 769
    T.B£iar - the People's Messiah says:

    Expenses ?? Shred ‘em !!

  770. 770
    McPoison says:

    Fuck off !!

  771. 771
    Ed Bollokov ( Son of Brown, Deficit-Admirer-in Chief ) says:

    Is this a dagger which I see before me ??

  772. 772

    Guido, did you know about this alleged affair for some time?

    If you did, why didn’t you run it on your blog? You know that hacks keep an eye on what you write.

  773. 773
    Anonymous says:

    Whatever they do between now and the BBC cuts they are going to happen. Goodbye to a rubbish lot of lefties.

  774. 774
    T. Cameron - The Trustfund Millionaire Heir to B£air says:

    My hero!! If only I had done that with my taxpayer funded mortgage and Wisteria.

  775. 775
    Gerry Keegan says:

    From what the papers are reporting Guido the affair concerns his wife and his ex-protection officer. Who is the more correct?

  776. 776
    he must have been pissed again says:

    What alledged affair? It was the wife who had the affair not Postie.
    Guido doesn’t have a clue what he’s writing any more.
    A warning to everyone…..never dr*nk and blog.

  777. 777
    McFawkes says:

    You Fuck off Weasel.

  778. 778
    Postlethwaite says:

    Exposure to the Courts would be good.
    I want my 100,000 odd quid back.
    (Smith does fake shock routine at this point)

  779. 779
    Sporrans Of Arabia says:

    Why d*d you ‘*’ out the ‘i’ in drink? Th*ck sh*t!!

  780. 780
    Alan (the English arent worth saving) Johnson says:

    Betrayed by the very Gestapo I helped create.

  781. 781
    Sporrans Of Arabia says:

    His hideous, slippery spouse is no better – only pops her horrid head up when there’s something in it for either of them – what a vile pair!!!

  782. 782
    This is not the beginning of the end but it is certainly the end of the beginning says:

    Nobody knows and that’s the problem….after 13 years of Labour Spin,Deceit and half truths nobody believes what they’re told by politicians of ANY party any more….their spin doctors are all as bad as each other…..particularly as years later after the events its proved that the public were misled over things…and if they can be misled over things as serious as why why this country went to war why should they belive lesser things such as this. ???..there is no trust left between politicians and their electorate…this is the legacy of Blair and Co and the master will no doubt be giving us another master-class to-day at Chilcot

  783. 783
    LOL! says:

    Hmmm… The police bodyguard is now under investigation while Guido’s “story” was based on him saying the word sources a few times with fuck all proof or anything to back him up.

    Who is telling the truth ???? That IS a tough one.

  784. 784
    Anonymous says:

    Oh dear, a real live moron here, Nye is an abbreviation of Earnest, halfwit.

  785. 785
    Sporrans Of Arabia says:

    He has got himself a cushy new position on the domestic front – he’s Blunkett’s new home-help!

  786. 786
    it's all the fault of an un-named source! of course, of course, of course. says:

    No,no,no,no. Guido says you were having the affair so that must be the truth.

    His Cabinet sources are now telling Guido that Wiliam Hague’s wife was taking Hagues spad up the arse and having a gay affair with the Spad.

  787. 787
    Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? says:

    Hit the nail on the head. …..this in itself alone is not a resigning matter…take Robin Cook as an example….he ditched his wife and still carried on as Foreign Secretary and Leader of the House until he resigned OVER Iraq NOT marital infidelity…let’s face it nobody cares whether you’re faithful/unfaithfal/gay or hetero these days as long as you don’t lie about it……………it’s usually the cover-up that causes the problems not the actual events

  788. 788
    lolololol says:

    Calm down dear! You’re only an anal twat.

  789. 789
    William Hague says:

    This is not a resigning affair. My paranoid windowlicker friends can’t accept that Guido was wrong.

  790. 790
    Cornflake says:

    So glad I found this blog, Guido. We need more such political outspokenness in the “United” Kingdom. I shall bookmark this page, that’s for sure. If ever you need a box of matches to light any fuses, let me know!

  791. 791
    lolol says:

    Pat wasn’t having the affair it was his wife.

    Who looks the cun’t now mong ? That would be you.

  792. 792
    On the commute home says:

    Was just thinking the same thing who are these crazies and why are they so angry with entire races / religions?

    Chill out, take a holiday, drink some wine and enjoy life!

  793. 793
    City of Vice says:

    OK I’ll answer your question for you then, Anonymous…

    a) The electoral boundaries are rigged in Labour’s favour. Once this is addressed Labour are fucked for good.

    b) Postal votes from ‘certain’ communities – if the government has any sense and clamps down on these third world level scams then Labour’s hold on certain seats, including Balls’, is fucked.

    c) Cos Cameron is a complacent fuck who started talking trendy vicar bollocks like the ‘big society’ and coming on meaningless beauty contests (debates) – Clegg was the beneficiary of that – when all he(Cameron) had to do is attack Brown and Labour’s record and largely keep his gob shut otherwise.

    d) Labour’s poll lead is temporary. The Tories are having to do the dirty work of cleaning up Labour’s mess in the teeth of a media onslaught by publicly funded Labour cheerleaders such as the BBC. Regardless, the rise of the serially incompetent and despised Balls (ie Gordon Brown without the charm!) if not checked will ensure that Labour has no chance of winning the next election.


  794. 794
    jgm2 says:

    Because he’s been up posting constantly, pleading like the pathetic Labour apologist he is, for balance, since 8PM last night and the drink has scrambled his brain.

    Although, to be fair, which I like to think I am, it had probably scrambled his brain years ago.

  795. 795
    jgm2 says:

    Go on, post the Hague clip.


  796. 796
    the Bodyguard says:

    Thank fuck Guido was on the ball with this one or I might be in the shi… oh right… real journalists knew all about me. Bum!

  797. 797
    City of Vice says:

    Conservative led would be fine, as the Liberals are a bunch of tossers. Trouble is, Cameron’s not really a Tory….

  798. 798
    jgm2 says:

    Oh, fuck me, he did post it already. Just like I ordered him to.

    Put down the bo*tle and get some kip Labour apologist droid.

  799. 799
    Gordon Brown says:

    Gizza a job Ed.

  800. 800
    NotASheep says:

    Oops, jumping to conclusions not always a good idea.

  801. 801
    The Bodyguard ( as missed by Guido Fawkes) says:



  802. 802

    Ooops-a-fucking-daisy, Guido…..

  803. 803
    Hahahahahahahahahaha!! says:

    Do you have a source for that?

  804. 804
    Finias finds says:

    WOW loads little Eddies puppies on here running all over the place like their minds posting up the same 3 you tube clips endlessly yapping on and on what the feck is wrong with you ? isn’t 13 yr s billions lost, pensions destroyed ,endless wars [which your lot lied about so stuff who else voted because your lot LIED!!] hundreds of thousands dead because your leaders couldn’t get on their knees fast enough for Bush [but its OK now because we laugh when Russell Howard tells jokes about thick Americans!!] !
    Hope ye proud ? and I hope you get yer wish in 2011 and get run over by a riot van martyred for the cause! mark steel will love that!

  805. 805
    Andy Coulson's monkey says:

    Hey Guido

    Thanks for posting any old bollocks that I give you. Sorry that this turned out to be duff info and makes you look a prat. I wouldn’t worry about it too much though cos mist people know you are a prat anyway.

    I will be sending you more made up crap to post over the next few weeks.

  806. 806
    Marty Feldman says:

    It seems that you have to have Bug Eyes to get a job withe the Unite led Opposition

  807. 807
    City of Vice says:

    I don’t think so. Osborne is much better at going for the jugular than Cameron. Osborne knows his brief and openly gets pissed off with Labour wankers when they talk shite, which is most of the time. It’s going to be open season on the serially incompetent Balls. And then there’s the McBride factor. The Balls / McBride smear project was directed as Cameron, Osborne and more importantly their families so there is no lovelost there. The difference now is that the Tories now have to resources of goverment to dig up any old crap on Balls they want to throw. Balls is toast.

  808. 808
    Anonymous says:

    See! irony isn’t that hard to get.

  809. 809
    jgm2 says:

    Aye, they’re totally rattled.

    Fucking delicious.

  810. 810
    Goose Sauce says:

    Who supported the Iraq war and still does ? Who promised to match Labour spending until the Bank crash ? Your hero Dave.

  811. 811
    lolol says:

    By Posties non existent affair ?

    Aye, we’re laughing our arse off at gullible fools like you.

    Fucking hilarious!

  812. 812
    The sound of silence says:

    Fawkes seems reluctant to post more on this “exclusive”. But why ?

  813. 813
    City of Vice says:

    Cue the pics of Balls parading in Nazi uniform….that should make him popular with Miliband, given the latter’s efnick background.

    This is going to be fun!

  814. 814
    David Cheater says:

    Shut up about expenses.

  815. 815
    Steve Miliband says:

    D Miliband is no hero of mine

  816. 816
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    So now it would appear that Mrs Johnson was “polishing a coppers helmet”

  817. 817
    Eeu to me says:

    If you want uptodate news go and read a newspaper or watch tv news,if you want to stir the shit up in real time then first of all read Guido’s strapline,of plots,rumours etc,if you think your not getting your moneys worth then ring up Consumr Direct or your local Trading Standards .

  818. 818

    This is one union i could do without !

  819. 819
    Postal Vote says:

    The real Balls story is that he would not have been re-elected without postal voting. Labour are the postal voting champions and Balls had a majority of only about 950 in a contituency in which some 10,000 votes were of the postal variety …

    The coalition is very quiet about changing postal voting procedures. But Cameron seems very naive anyway when it comes to electoral law. Otherwise he would do his utmost to prevent AV getting air time since AV can be the death knell for the conservatives if labour plays its cards clever. Despite the start of improving the government’s finances, there are still millions employed by the public sector and on benefits and it won’t be hard to persuade the labour ones among them living in conservative seats to cast their second vote for the libdems; vice versa, young lib dems will easily be persuaded to put in their second vote for labour. AV looks to end the conservatives’ chances to gain power …

  820. 820
    Up sh1t creek says:

    It was all very convenient that this Alan Johnson story happened just before Blair goes to the Iraq inquiry, arguably a much bigger story. Labour spin machine in action.

  821. 821
    Dave's Poodle Army says:

    But Call me Dave the Heir to Blair is.

  822. 822
    Offshore Bank Account says:

    There are billions that will never be found.

  823. 823
    Eeu to me says:

    I keep wondering when the shitehawk Brown will suddenly appear as leader of the Liebour party,he wasn’t elected as leader and he wasn’t elected as PM so what’s stopping him this time.

  824. 824
    Weygand says:

    What was worst Guido – getting it wrong or finding that Andrew Porter of the Telegraph actually cited you as the source of his story – only for it to be wrong?

    Are you going to say that did it on purpose just to stop people pinching from your site?

  825. 825
    Kasey says:

    “Alan Johnson’s suspected affair with a civil servant was widely rumoured around Westminster…… The story was kept out of the papers – until now.”

    Whatever you snivelling thunderHunt.

    Hopefully this complete Balls up on your behalf will have people leaving your sorry excuse of a site in droves now that your previously low credibility has been eviscerated through not being able to keep your mouth shut about a story that genuinely had you perplexed.

    Good day.

  826. 826

    The top three Mps in the Shadow cabinet are Brownites. With 2 dozen Blairites gone or working for DC, can we now say the DC is the leading Blairite at Westminster?

  827. 827
    Eeu to me says:

    No I just think the the stirrers couldn’t sink that low for an ex PM who’s only interest is wealth,houses and world power mmm my own question answered.

  828. 828

    Huntstable Paul Rice
    is about to be suspended by the Met after carrying out
    his own internal investyigation

  829. 829

    This will strengthen Labour as there will be less of a need to keep both Blairite & Brownte camps happy

  830. 830
    misterned says:

    Seems that it was his missus that was doing the dirty.

    Alan Johnson has my sympathy. I hope that he can find happiness in the future.

  831. 831
    Where are Tony Blair's Expenses says:

    Remember it was Balls’ idea to tax pension funds back in 97 and effectively destroy the private pensions industry in the UK.

  832. 832
    F. Atuous says:

    Guido’s original story may well be true, with Mrs J then finding in part 2, after the EastEnder type booms, a nice warm shoulder to cry on .. I find the image of AJ as cuckold neat a bit hard to swallow, surely some other personal ingredients mixed into the brew. Meanwhile on Twitter some not altogether obscure literary and media female figures are “hearting” AJ and so on and offering “support”.

  833. 833
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Warsi is a fool but for Champagne Charlie to accuse others of not being up to the job is given his record of turning up to events too pissed to speak properly and not turning up too events due to being too pissed to speak properly.

  834. 834
    Eeu to me says:

    Reporters used to find their own stories and not sit on blogs waiting for them appear so they can cut n paste into newspapers,we’ve had 13years of goverment reports cut n pasted into newspapers,reporters are supposed to be the eyes and ears for the public to make sure public people are playing honest and fair,it also helps to sell newspapers.

  835. 835
    English Liberation Front. says:

    Both are correct is the answer!

  836. 836
    Smig says:

    That’ll be because some religions, well one predominantly, preache that it’s followers should turn the entire world into one big islamic caliphate. Regardless of whether the existing culture wishes to join them in the worship of their chosen skyfairy.

  837. 837
    Smig says:

    Where there’s freedom to trough to your hearts content while taking lots off money of the infidels.

    Go to Junction 15, M25. Look for the big flying things and get a oneway ticket for a ride on one.

  838. 838
    English Liberation Front. says:

    I believe Guido’s original story to be true – the bit about Mrs J is just a distraction. Let’s hope the whole truth will out.

  839. 839
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Fair play to the police protection officer for shafting the wife – Labour have been shafting the rest of us for thirteen years, nice to see some payback.

    Regarding the confusion over which Johnson was misbehaving, I would surmise that both are true – he was playing away, the pissed-off wife then decided to have her own fun, and her dalliance has been leaked by Labour as damage control for him.

  840. 840
    Stryker Miliband says:

    Two words: Bron Madson.

  841. 841
  842. 842
    Name lost due to cache clearing tragedy says:

    And THIS is why Balls and Miliband cannot be trusted.

  843. 843
  844. 844
    Name lost due to cache clearing tragedy says:

    The Doctor has gay thoughts on the mind. Quite a lot, it would seem.

  845. 845
    Cassandra King says:

    Shows the Westminster vermin and heir MSM hack stooges in their true colours though does it not?

    Postman Twat does a Prescott on his wife but its the wife that gets the poison pill.
    Political shit does the dirty and the likes of toenails keep it secret and as soon as it looks like the political shit is going to get grassed up by another political virus its a case of heaping the blame on the wronged wife? Niiice! and perfect for the likes of Gruppenfuhrer Balls.

  846. 846
    Weygand says:

    Another under cover police operation that has back fired.

  847. 847
    Naughty says:

    I don’t know what Mrs Johnson looks like. Is she attractive? Has Alan’s former guard got good taste in having an affair with her?

  848. 848
    the next Mr Katona says:

    I’ve seen stiffer spines on a Jellyfish.

  849. 849
    Andy Quitsoon says:

    I never bugged nobody rozzers!

  850. 850
    Andy Quitsoon says:

    or just plain bullshit he made up

  851. 851
    Tell it like it really is says:

    The Toady prog = Fri am = Justin Creep whilst cooing together with some US nonenity about how Oblamer is blueblood and spiritual leader (FFS) trotted out the line – But here at bbc we have to be IMPARTIAL – beyond irony.

  852. 852
    misterned says:

    Breaking News::: Coulson Resigns!!!

    I wonder if the police have finally managed to uncover some evidence? Or has his missus been shagging around too?

    Good day to bury bad news? If it is bad news about the tories, the BBC will NEVER let it be buried! They only do that for labour.

  853. 853
    NotW_Scumbag says:

    Johnson was a total thicko, so His Redness is better off without him.

    The real question here is : was the assigned plod porkin’ his missus ?

    It’s beginning to look like plods just can’t keep it in their pants.

  854. 854
    Andy Quitsoon says:

    Andy Coulson was shagging the bodyguard so cabinet sources claim.

  855. 855
    Coulson needs help says:

    coulson has gone the BBC reported it forst

  856. 856
    Handycock says:

    I don’t know why you are all criticising Alan Johnson for being uneducated and unable to grasp the intricacies of economics, I am equally uneducated and don’t understand them either. It is entirely irrelevant, Gordon Brown has a Phd and certainly didn’t understand them. No politcian understands economics, to expect them to is to misunderstand politcians. Politicians enter politics to pursue their own agendas, normally money, in my case money and sex. Their limit of economic understanding is fiddling their expenses, and some of them are not even very good at doing that. Lol.

  857. 857
    Sixupman says:

    Was it my imagination but did the Mail web-site not run a piece about a top politician having obtained a “super-injunction” relative to his sexual exploits.

    It was then taken-down are the two related.

    My God, Balls looks smug, what about his missus?

  858. 858
    RT says:

    “He should address the postal voting scam as well.”

    This is shocking. Not that they’re scamming postal votes, that the postal votes actually arrive before the election!

  859. 859
    butch83 says:

    Хорошо было бы заказать мебель на этом сайте!

  860. 860
    Gideons CV says:

    yup, we should criticise Alan Johnson for his lack of education and real life work experience; he was clearly out of his depth.

    Thank fuck our economy is in the hands of someone with a 2:1 in Modern History who’s only job outside Conservative Central Office is a summers data entry for the NHS.

  861. 861
    Robbie says:

    Balls- asking to have that fat ego deflated
    Campbell- I’ve never shouted f*ck off to anyone that often before on QT
    Galloway-outrageous but hit a lot of right notes on the night-particulalry Iraq
    Dimbelbore-time he started drawing his pension
    Johnsons- I think there is more of this story to come out
    Coulson- right decision-who can handle it now though?

  862. 862
    British Citizen says:

    So why leave and yet stay in the same house? Because she is a solicitor who went to Edinburgh University like fizzy ornageman himself who signs documents she has not read.

  863. 863
    Jones says:

    What is a ‘totty?’ What is a ‘twat’? do you really have such low levels of literacy or do you have to accomodate your less than avarage followers?

    do your knuckles trail the ground when you walk?

  864. 864
    Jones says:

    Is this purely a site for socially malajusted and those disaffected from the human species?

    Who would read this?

  865. 865
    Jones says:

    What is Mr Fawkes’ I.Q?

    Does he consider it to be above that of his ‘readers’?

  866. 866
    Jones says:

    Can none Mr Fawkes ‘commentators express themseves witho9ut resorting to the most base language?

    does Mr Fawkes have any standards for his site? Why does he attract so many bullies?

  867. 867
    Jones says:

    Why is the part which Mr Fawkes endorses, devotes all his time to, and bases his life around, known as the nasty party?

  868. 868
    Dave S says:

    Deficit (or surplus) is a chosen financial position called by the Chancellor of the day, the annual difference between income and expenditure, and bridged by government borrowing.

    Alistair Darling in his last budget speech declared government borrowing (and hence deficit) for four successive years.

    Nothing to do with banks or any other external factor, surely everyone knows this.

  869. 869
    Prophet says:

    Baroness Warsi

    It’s been a busy week for you. Now you can relax with your burkha and dildo. Enjoy!

    I’m off to a dinner party now……………

Seen Elsewhere

Beeb Bias is Counterproductive | Nicholas Booth
Bercow Blames Colleagues for Clerk Mess | Guardian
Tony Benn Too Left-Wing For Soviet Union | Telegraph
Mrs Danczuk’s Festive Treat | Sun
Hollande Forced to Ditch Super-Tax | Mail
1 in 3 Back UKIP Over Chinky-Gate | Breitbart
Ed Miliband Taken Hostage | Worcester News
This Brilliant Coalition, Apart from Craig Oliver | Peter Oborne
Digital Politics: Standing Still Faster | Rafael Behr
After David Cameron, the Tories are Stuffed | Dan Hodges
John Humphrys Admits Skewed BBC Coverage | David Keighley

Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Peter Oborne makes a bold prediction

“I predict that Labour and the Conservatives will win between them a higher proportion of seats than at any election since 1992.”

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,647 other followers