Lets take a moment of quiet reflection as David Chaytor faces his last night of freedom. It will be an outrage to justice and shame this country’s legal system if the former Labour MP is not given a custodial sentence. Chaytor has admitted he shamelessly stole £13,000 from the taxpayer for a mortgage he had already paid off. Under section 17 of the Theft Act 1968 lawmakers are not above the law.
Don’t drop the soap David…
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Norman Tebbit has a humble brag:
“We Maastricht rebels were derided and abused for opposing the single currency by the wise, clever, Guardianista soft centre left establishment from whom we now hear so little on the matter.”
Mr Bryant and Mr Watson managing to make the whole hacking affair look like a farce – the more they moan the less I care about the whole subject! So partisan it beggars belief at all costs. They cannot rise above it ! If I was to call the PM a ‘liar’ I would want to be VERY sure.
That could go down well in Old & Sad…
I’m not old or sad ?
No way the Hoon will go down
Suspended or community at most
Nobody holds socialists in contempt as much as I,however a custodial sentence for this example of stupidity is absurd. He is finished and his being sent down serves nothing useful except to satisfy the revenge idiots that enjoy reading the Sun. Blaire is a war criminal complicit in the deaths of thousands and he is still swaning round the world earning millions!
OK, so Blair deserves 10 to 15 years compared to the three or so which would be suitable for this thief. That Blair has not yet been charged is not a reason for Chaytor to get away with this serious breach of trust.
I am a revenge idiot who reads (along with all the other news) the Sun. I hope the twat does go down, and for a good long time, and his ill gotten gains are confiscated along with interest, from his assets. Now, bliar deserves far, far more when he is found guilty – chaytors mistake, according to the liebour rulebook, was staying in the UK
I’d do a 12 stretch for the pleasure of giving Bliar a few extra navels.
Fair is fair. Life for a life. Out in time for Qatar ’22.
IP address: 285.361.2.1
The main reason to bang him up is to deter others.
Don’t forget your toothbrush David.
Well, for financial abuses where you are in a position of trust, even for a first time offence its 5 years.
So he copped a plea earlyish. That gets a couple of years off.
MPs discount.
If he gets away with less than 2 years playing hide the soap, he’s a lucky boy.
Blaire is a war criminal complicit in the deaths of thousands and he is still swaning round the world earning millions!
You can’t even spell “Blair” and neither can you spell “swanning”. Yes, you really are a useless Hunt. Now fuck off and back to school you subnormal reprobate.
Jeffo,
So stealing 15 grand deserves nothing but a slap on the wrist, does it?
I wonder if your attitude would be the same if it was a Tory MP? I wonder if your attitude would be the same if Chaytor was some chavscum scrote who’d broken into your gaff and nicked 15 grands worth of stuff.
Judges are girls’ blouses these days so probably just probation.
It needs a sadistic old bastard like the late Lord Chief Justice Goddard who admitted in a private conversation that he got an erection every time he gave a death sentence.
Time to revive the old formula.
Lamp-post, piano wire, MP, baying mob. Some assembly required.
wonder if the proceeds of crime act 2002 will be used? Should be.
Will barely get reported, and certainly not by th Beeb. If a Tory farts in public, the stink is all over the headlines for days, but Labour’s criminally corrupt MPs go unoticed by their media lickspittles.
There there tory boy don’t cry
Yeth! I did weally well on Wadio 2 today, didn’t I?
That’ll galvenise my thupporterth.
I’m a geniuth.
You were fucking hilarious, Ed. At one point I almost felt sorry for you.
I didn’t.
Schoolboy ‘chased and stabbed’ in Sydenham park
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-12130431
How depressing. In my day, the chase would have been followed by a simple debagging.
I was talking to a young lad of eleven recently in our green leafy Berkshire village and I told him that I had grown up in south-east London in the ’50s. He was astounded that I hadn’t been mugged, ever, and that there had been no knife crime.
Don’t expect a ‘Stephen Lawrence’ type show of outrage from the media.
Shh. Keep quiet about this, old bean.
What what.
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SID&HAM PORK
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I see the guilty parties cannot be named “for legal reasons”, but who agrees with me in thinking their names won’t be anything like Edward, George or Henry?
Correct.
I know Home Park. I was brought up and schooled in that area. Poor lad.
This is an outrage! There needs to be a public enquiry into how the Police failed to stop such an attack.
The victim was white? Oh! Sorry for the interruption, please do carry on.
Don’t forget Lord Hannningfield – how come the press are so silent about him?
Chaytor as admitted
he should have about just enough time to watch england win the ashes
My money’s on 00:32 in the morning (proper Wiltshire time) when the last wicket falls, with the remaining Aussies having climbed to 302 all out having put on a proper old slog. But I don’t want you making any biased decisions to scupper my bet, Billy.
I’d love to be there – the SCG is a great place to watch cricket (second only to Lord’s in my opinion) plus the pubs outside like the Captain Cook and the Bat and Ball are legendary as well.
I’ve only been to the SCG once, to watch the Aussie Prime Minister’s XI play the Windies in the 83′ – 84′ tour in an ODI: I was working for a few months on a farm 200 miles west of Sydney in my Gap Year. Saw David Boon’s debut, caught and bowled by Joel Garner. Bob Hawke was there too, and made a pitchside appearance to present a few trophies and bowl a ceremonial wide that Clive Lloyd felt he had to try to hit. Can’t remember much else – too many tinnies on the Hill in the sunshine. Of course, now that I’m a touch older and somewhat less precipitate, no doubt I’d hold out long enough to try the pubs outside after the game.
My psychotic powers know no bounds. I really should become a proper gambler.
You are Paul the Octopus and I claim my 5 squid.
LOL!
6 squid – he’s dead which in my book is very sick
I hope he remembers to pack a tub of vaseline.
I hope it’s a Ford.
Tory grandee Lord Tebbit has called for voters to back the UK Independence Party in the Oldham by-election in a bid to push the Lib Dems into fourth place.
The former cabinet minister sought to derail David Cameron’s tacit deal to help the Lib Dems win the seat from Labour. He warned that a victory for Nick Clegg’s party would push the Coalition further to the left.
In a statement on UKIP’s website, Lord Tebbit said: ‘Of course, as one who believes that the people of this kingdom should govern themselves, I have an instinctive sympathy with the UKIP candidate and I hope that at the very least he puts the Lib Dems into fourth place.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1344782/Lord-Tebbit-urges-election-voters-UKIP-attempt-derail-Lib-Dems.html#ixzz1AKyGAZoi
Fucking first!!
With your cretinous grasp of numbers, you could be the next Labour Chancellor.
Pick up that soap, boy
weeee! weeee!
I’ll be okay, I’ve just converted to Islam. VIP treatment and tasty curries for me.
He is not going to get banged up. Calm down, he will get a community sentence.
The judge will mutter something like exemplary character and all that other crap.
I’m going to let him roam free in the countryside.
That’ll be 6 months in Ford then..?
Ooh, no. That’s a bit harsh.
A couple of weeks sunbathing in Kent this summer, I think. Folkestone beach, with fish and chips! That’ll educate the little scamps.
My great-great grandfather would have tweaked his woggle and then had Mr. Chaytor staked face down over the punge-trench for 5 days, during which time Psalm 23 would be chanted at him every half hour, whilst the members of the troop continued to perform their motions around him.
Fond memories!
That happened once before. How strange.
1 down, 645 left to go. Lets hope the judge throws the book at him, maximum sentence, as it really would send a firm message to other “representatives of the people” to stop the shameless pilfering of taxpayers money. The other swine need to go down too.
Lets see, duck houses, one’s moat cleaned out, flip-flopping,etc I know they are supposed to have payed back, they have haven’t they? but your average Joe the burlar is not let off if he offers to pay back, besides if hell had not broken out they would all have stayed schtum (forgive spelling) and nothing would have been said!
Maybe not burlars but disgracefully a good looking bird from Babestation was made pay back £5 000 carers allowance she should not have received but an ugly munter who got £73 000 was not. Equality of opportunity etc. I blame Jacqui Smith who got away with £100k+ as Home Secretary and looks like the back of one ugly bus!
I’m starting to understand why that fat hoon Clark is so keen to make prison a thing of the past. It’s got bugger all to do with “modernising the rehabilitation of offenders” and everything to do with making sure he and his colleagues have a nice retirement.
His behaviour does tend to lend weight to that observation. There are an awful lot of fellow members who, given the evidence, should be facing Chaytor’s fate in the dock. How remarkably progressive it would be, if none ever faced anything harsher than 30 hours of community gardening.
I’m not sure anyone can seriously believe that he won’t get off with community service.
It’s a big test this though – he really should get something custodial but of course we all expect the judge to wimp out. A precedent needs to be set here.
It needs to be, but i’ll be pleasant surprised if we’re celebrating a 4 or 5 year term tomorrow.
… at a minimum.
.. and then they turn him the right way up.
Realistically I’m hoping for two years although I would like to see longer sentences for people who abuse their public position. Of the ones who are currently charged Chaytor’s offence is about the worst but he’s probably hoping that pleading guilty will lighten the sentence.
Neil, the only service he can give the community involves a chair & a rope.
Enough money has been wasted on fiddled expenses without incurring more costs keeping the thieves in prison.
Like all the other Fuckwit theives, the Hunt’ll go to an open prison. No fucking justice.
Aint that a shame
Even more open since new year. Open to the skies.
It’s good (for criminals) to be closer to nature.
And frost.
You have a ‘thing’ about the cold don’t you, nell? Were you locked out in the winter, once?
Nell? I’m Tessa.
I’m Tessa!
My sincere apologies, madam. I had stiff nipples on my mind and inadvertently typed nell instead of Tessa Tickles.
It’s an easy mistake to make.
There’s a lot of it about.
That’s OK, give them some old army tents it is winter after all and cold and wet
That’s what I gave British troops serving in Afghanistan. Sort of.
Everything they wanted, they got. Och the noo.
Parachute him in then. We’ll cut his strings beforehand.
*Justice Day*? In your dreams, Guido.
HELLO DAVID CHAYTOR. ** RATA-TAT-A-TAT-A-TAT **
HELLO DAVID CHAYTOR’S FELLOW MPs ** RATA-TAT-A etc etc.
Got it. She looks more shaggable than she did 30 whatever years ago.
Nice to see a young John Sergeant on sax @ 1.37
Quite nice. Never heard it before. I don’t listen to ephemeral music, generally.
Are we doing guesses?
2 years, SUSPENDED
3 months, suspended.
Odds on no bird.
12 months immediate. You heard it here first.
12 hours max before his an*us is ripped open in the showers.
Public debagging and radishing followed by a damned good flogging and a night in the cells. Sentence to be repeated for each one of the 15000 pounds he nicked.
I think you could be right, however it will send the wrong message to the rest of the troughers. Lets hope we are wrong and he is sent down.
He’s on my list tomorrow. Nine months and a bollocking, I think…
… that should be followed up with a de-bollocking
20 years breaking rocks
On his fucking head!
Fine him 40 quid for every nugget he nicked off us.
That’s 40 x 13000 = er … um ….
….oh, I fucking know this one ….
…..whatever. It’s a big number.
6?
Nearly right Alan. You’re really getting the hang of this numbers thingy aren’t you?
I’ve been reading “Economics for Dummies”.
It’s Gordon’s old copy, but I’ve read further than he did; I’ve got beyond the copyright notice, I’m on the index page.
Have you seen the revision notes Gordon made at the back.
“Everybody Loves Raymond”
“I love Raymond”
QED
“Everyone loves me!”
“There’s no such thing as a free lunch” ..yet!
“G-R-E-E-N-S-P-A-N not Greenstick.. must stop calling him that.”
“* note to self.* There’s no such thing as zero % growth.”
“Must google REGULATION. I keep reading about it but have no idea what it means.”
Have you seen the revision notes Gordon made at the back.
“Everybody Loves Raymond”
“I love Raymond”
QED
“Everyone loves me!”
“There’s no such thing as a free lunch” ..yet!
“Greenspan not Greenstick.. must stop calling him that.”
“* note to self.* There’s no such thing as zero % growth.”
“Must google REGULATION. I keep reading about it but have no idea what it means.”
He will absolutely not get banged up in chokey. Under Dripping Wet Ken’s new “wet wet wet” regime, you have to be a serial killer before they will even consider a custodial sentence.
I hope he gets banged up and has to be somebody’s bitch. But I can’t see it happening… fookin’ politicians. All of them.
“Everyone needs friends in here…will you be my friend…no? Hard to get. I like it.”
“Let’s play Mummies and Daddies – do you want to be Mummy or Daddy?”
“Err – Daddy I think”
“Ok – now come over here and suck Mummy’s c**k!”
*CHORTLE*, sir. One likes the cut of one’s jib.
Yours, perusing Stanislav’s back catalogue over a Diamond White and Tennant’s Super snake bite with a Red Bull Smirnoff chaser, Col. M.T. Kernel (deceased)
Lady Virginia! Really. You told me, “Normally, I am very polite.”
This has cast a ghastly mental image for me which will probably give me nightmares tonight. I should have gone to bed earlier.
It’s an oldie but a goodie!!
Was there not a case recently before court where a parliamentary employee was given a custodial sentence for nicking something like £6,500 by fiddling the system that MP’s use? He was not an MP himself but worked I think in the claims office.
Anyone have a link to jog my memoery?
LOL, does anyone have a link to jog my mammary?
Found it. He got 9 months.
A House of Commons worker in charge of handling MPs’ expenses was jailed for stealing nearly £6,000 in bogus claims.
http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard/article-23883756-mp-expenses-officer-jailed-for-bogus-invoices.do
Get with it Handsome! The one that went to jail was a “HoC worker” .
MPs have a different set of rules applied to their criminality.
Please be wrong. I posted above about £73 000 in illicit carers allowance not having to be paid back but a smaller amount having to be. At this rate it would mean it was illegal to murder Brown but not if you did it in conjunction with Blair, Booth-Blair, Mandfleson. Prescott, Smith, Harman and the rest that I left out!
Here’s one – a picture that was sellotaped to many a bedroom ceiling back in the 1980s
http://images.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=http://www.astronomy-pictures.net/telescopes/telescope-image-large/signed-8×10-photo-sexy-topless-samantha-fox_270658928193.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.astronomy-pictures.net/telescopes/SIGNED-8X10-PHOTO-SEXY-TOPLESS-SAMANTHA-FOX_270658928193.html&usg=__nyPtGHnIBSgfExUHQ7E9-q1LInE=&h=400&w=308&sz=27&hl=en&start=202&zoom=1&tbnid=Fbl6EonbCL7vzM:&tbnh=124&tbnw=88&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dsamantha%2Bfox%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1624%26bih%3D734%26gbv%3D2%26tbs%3Disch:10%2C3249&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=710&vpy=366&dur=18&hovh=256&hovw=197&tx=98&ty=95&ei=ajomTbusHJqM4gbW0KG7CQ&oei=QTomTcejMoKF4QbV58yEAg&esq=6&page=6&ndsp=41&ved=1t:429,r:35,s:202&biw=1624&bih=734
Ah! That is better. I may sleep well tonight after all now. But what is this tickling my chin?
Horrible tits and an even worse gob
Nearly poked my eyes out. Loving it !!
Does she speak russian? I am looking for a new assistant.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-11445034
There you go.
Thank you. Lets see what Chaytor gets.
I admire your tenacity, Handsome. So, if there’s to be any consistency, Chaytor should get 18 months. Hmm.
Why did P*aul pay pater? WTF’s that got to do with anything?
He may drop the soap….never bend to pick it up. Well it couldn’t have happened to a nicer fella. One law for them and one law for us….nothing wozld supprise me!
Trouble is I don’t know Chaytor that well and prior to being apprehended he wasn’t noted for making a dick of himself on the public stage.
Hence the enjoyment I get from his incarceration will be nothing to that I will get if that obnoxious shit McShane gets sent down.
I want to be a pelican.
I want you to go far, outer mongolia sounds a nice place.
My vote is for the liquid core of the earth (about the same distance as Outer Mongolia), or if we’re feeling generous and we can afford the launch fees, turn him into a human satellite. That way he’ll get to see the world a few times before his carcass burns up on re-entry.
Can we stretch to the air thingy? Or the space suit?
Go up to the roof Gordon, you can do it! You can really fly! To the roof, look at all the buildings below you and just… fly! Fly Gordon, fly!!!
That great lump of of offal wouldn’t make to the top of the stairs…uummm
I want to be a politician when I grow up.
“Didn’t do very well on R2 though, did you Ed?”
“The deficit is not Labour’s fault”
Phones rang of the hook and servers crashed with emailers begging to differ.
I don’t, generally, *do* anger but this Hunt really caused my hackles to stiffen. The guy actually is a droid/drone/dork.
I could have interviewed my garden shed and had a more informative conversation.
You, sir, are a fuckwit.
Yes I am
I got friends in low places.
Fuck off slags, I aint going down. It’s who you know not what you know Tory Fawkes.
I wants 2 get 2 no U betta!
On past form, the (bandit) judge hearing the case will leap into the dock and suck him off until his plumbs are empty. Then later, the filthy dirty shit that live in Noway will give him the Nobel peace prize (+ the £2 million grant that goes with it). And then he will be made a lord, and Cameron will suck his arse clean 500 times before offering to let him shag one of his dead spaz kids to death as his retarded diseased mong wife entertains with cucumbers.
Thankyou, Fiona Bruce.
And now, the weather where you are…
Hahaha! Looking forward to Big Tam Sheridan getting into the shower!
Don’t be surprised if Slotgob has pulled some strings to get the c unt off from a prison sentence.
Why should this former Honourable Member be imprisoned? He has obviously made an understandable mistake.
I did my time, well some of it, but my crime wasn’t as bad as fraud, just a little inattention at the wheel.
Guido, I can’t believe that you are taking money to advertise Gordon Brown’s book on your blog. Can we have a whip round and pay you not to advertise it?
Oh come on, Guido is allowed to advertise comedy fiction if he wants to.
I would have thought it’s the only time in Brown’s “public service” that he has had to pay his own money out,every time I see the Ad I think how many on this blog would shell out a load of money for toilet paper.
Its a riveting read.
If you like riveting then this is the book for you.
You are all such a horrible lot. Why not in the name of Diversity introduce Sharia law into the sentencing as an experiment. The previous Labour Goverment loved experimenting with our money and worshipped diversity and our friends from the east, so perhaps this would be a fitting way of celebrating these important features. Perhaps they could have a double celebration with the lovely Cherie Blair atthe same time
Bring it on.
I don’t think that it is just your hand that you would lose under Sharia law, Mikey boy…
He will go to prison in his own home.
Oh, and his golf club, of course; and he can pop over to The Carlton and, obviously, we wouldn’t prevent him attending Henley, Ascot, Wimbledon, that sort of thing.
Harsh, but fair, I think…
Although I hate islam with a white hot intensityI’dlike to see a bit of sharia applied to this thieving Hunt. Chop his hand off. MPs seem quite keen on sharia for us, let them have a dose.
Yeah. Fuck Progressivism. Let’s get retro.
Yeah. Fuck Progressivism. Let’s get retro.
I’d like to get retro with you.
He’ll be swopping subsidised booze for subsidised methadone.
I’ll give him a warm, wet welcome. I’ve been wanting a new girlfriend.
The palace of scoundrels look after their own,so only a wrap on nuckles will be the only thing expected.
Or even a rap on knuckles…
Two packages explode in government buildings in the US state of Maryland but there are no injuries, officials say
WANKERS!
Just place the bombs under the khazi along with a copy of the Guardian or Mirror
When the fat publicly funded arsehole settles down for a 20 minute shit circa 10 am
One publicly funded parasite sent into orbit
Nubile females will be punished by having Opik sent into them
That ain’t no hardship
Hung like horse, he is…
No, that’s his right arm.
The bit he’s supposed to insert into you hangs between his legs.
Inserting arms into people used to be the preserve of former BBC presenters
Pelt the scum with intestines then crucify him over a warming winter fire as he enjoys his warming barbed wire hat
Its the best way to deal with j”"”
My friend
You are too lenient
No stoning
Raping of his children
Burning of his entrails before his face
This country has gone to the dogs
Too true, and the dogs are called Abdul.
I was in a film, once, and they gave me LIFE for trying to smuggle a few bars of hash out of Turkey. It was only a film, FFS!
Still, warming to the part, I took it up the arse for an hour or two before killing a couple of Abduls and walking back to the US of A.
For an hour or two – more like for several months. Still at least it made it easier for him to hide things up his arse.
Stealing is what we do best!
Your inalienable right.
quite – left and right and centre are all very good at ‘abusing the public purse’
A shame really, that the lawnmakers should not be exempt – we need better rights for the layers of sod
Someone should grass ‘em up. Handycock is rather seedy and seems to spend too much time making hay.
7 years!
Lovely thought but will not happen.
And the twat will still be able to vote for the other twats…….twat.
Don’t get too excited, you know that it won’t be ‘in the public interest to impose a custodial sentence’.
You have to realise if he goes down he could take a load more out on his return from clink by writing a book on how his life has been turned upside down by the dishonesty of MP’s in the Palace of thieves and how he tried to stop these people stealing public money,as he’s the first he will be the only one that could do it,those thieving bastards know this and will make sure he walks free but with a nod to the law for PR’s sake.
This is why a massive fine would be more appropriate. I won’t hold my breath, though.
A massive fine of 50p will be imposed to make sure other people who have the same idea are stopped by amount of money the person is fined.
If it hasn’t already been pointed out: if he does porridge guess who pays for his board and keep? Yep, Muggins. A. Taxpayer, the same ones who he ripped off in the first place. It’s a lose-lose.
Just look forward to the mobile phone camera shots sent from chokey at his first introduction to the Big Bull from D Wing.
Yes but why should mr and mrs taxpayer fork out for his prison bumfun? Just stick him in the stocks for a day put a basket of rotten eggs and stinky fruit there with a sign “please throw”
He’s gonna get covered in much worse than rotten eggs and stinky fruit, believe me.
When’s that cun’t, Morley, going on trial, then?
How the fuck will the court be able to tell the defendant and the ponce-in-a-wig apart?
One has his cheeks clenched tightly in anticipation.
was it me dreaming or did Cameron say today that he was looking at the price of petrol and considering a way to maybe reduce the duty on it? Given that we pay about 70% of the price of petrol (£1-28 / litre locally) to the fucking government isn’t he being somewhat disengenious as he’s known about the recent duty rise for months …. ?
here’s the link:
http://www.which.co.uk/news/2011/01/fuel-rise-is-painful-and-difficult-for-motorists-241549/
why is this in moderation?
Everything should be done in moderation.
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You seem to put yourself about. Please die an actual painful death. Many thanks.
The ModBot is having an oil change. You have a window of opportunity to be moderately rude.
I’ll kick things off: All politicians are rotters. They need a good talking to.
Reply
Hiya WSJ Editor. How’s things round your neck of the woods?
He’s just moved into the future. The only way to go is to become a criminal. Think of the opportunities that will surface. “My classes with the other inmates, sorting out their problems” or “How i became converted to penal reform”. Who knows, he could emerge to an appointment to Ken Clarke’s “Prison doesn’t work and costs too much” programme.
Either way, just like Aitken and Archer, you can’t keep a bad smell down.
I’m a bit concerned about the future. Time travel is not available.
If it was someone would have come back from the future to warn us not to all get into buy-to-lets and hedge funds.
If anybody could have come back from the future, they would have drowned Ted Heath at birth.
Why wait that long?
One down another 640+ to go! Lovely
Glad they didn’t catch me
This time tomorrow night, Chaytor will be just like Santa.
He’ll have an empty sack.
Can I have a bedtime story, nurse?
How about “Little Ed Hiding Good”
I call my cock Little Ed, and I give it a right good hiding when the drugs are working.
Gold-i-lost and the three Laybears.
Hey Gordon I’ve just got the sequel from the library for you – its called
Gold-i-lost … and the 3 blairs (Tone, Ian and Hazel .. well ok blears)
You bad bigoty nurse. I hit you now. Where is Mr Nokia?
Nurse; yours is better.
‘Gold-i-lost and the 3 Blairs’ it is.
Then
“Little Red-Ed robbing hood” – Read by Derek Simpson
“The Pie piper” – Eric Pickles
“Tom Thump” – John Prescott
“The Princess and the BBC” – Peter Mandelson
Yes, dear. Put Mr. Winkie away and I’ll begin.
Once upon a time, there was this nasty, spiteful, little boy, whose head had been totally screwed up by his insane, sky fairy-worshipping parents.
He really wanted to kill his father and then fuck his mother up the arse but, being restricted to a bowl of gruel and one deep-fried Mars Bar a day, he just couldn’t muster up the strength to do it.
So he looked at the outside world ….
That’s enough for now, Mr. Brown. We will read some more tomorrow. Shall I don the marigolds or will you fidget unassisted tonight?
Will the next installment appear here tomorrrow?
Would you like
“Tales of the RBSbank”?
or perhaps
one of your favourite Mr Men books .. I have read you Mr Boom every night now for as long as I can remember ….. how about Mr Bust tonight for a change?
I like Bill and Ben The Flowerpot Men.
Weed!
This is a financial crime, so a large fine is a win-win for those he chayted
would be good to have some bankers in the same situation….
Justice?
Oh do give over.
“I accept this is very difficult. We inherited a whole lot of tax plans that the last government had in place. One was an increase in fuel duty and we have had to put that in place. And obviously with the increase in VAT as well – you can tell when you fill up the car, it’s £1.32 and higher and it is very painful and difficult.”
You’ll feel a small prick and then later, a big prick.
Had to laugh at your moniker.
Is there a more screwy gruesome family than the Bliars? Tony’s a c unt with £60m worth of blood money, Slotgob is a greedy ugly sack of vomit, Kathryn is a fat suicidal skank, the sons are robotic clones of their father, and Lauren Booth has become a born again muzee. What a bunch of fuckers.
But then again, in a Conservative view, they’ve raised themselves up by the bootstraps and made good.
What’s the betting the grandchildren go to Eton?
Blair went to Fettes FFS
Kinnocks come close
Ok, ah, look, hm, thanks for that, but what about the negative stuff I’ve been hearing you’ve been saying?
The dirty great moron pig, Kathryn Bliar, seems to have lost some weight lately. She might have had it sucked out of her giant arse and sumo belly, or shes seeing a rent-a-dealer like Dr Conrad Murray for fucking huge bags of fets to stuff in her comedy gob 3 times a day.
Also, shes spossed to have a BF (but it looks like a nobbless manikin from the YMCA Aids Awareness centre).
Filthy rotten family of shite for the sewers.
What’s wrong with a good old public lynching?
Think of the tourist opportunities.
They also burn nicely
Like a pine cone that has been soaked in KFC and had wool glued to on top
I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker I am a Labour Wanker
Well that’s a more even-handed position than you normally take Robert .. I thought you only used your left hand.
Scouting for Boys by Robert Baden Powell: Masturbation is often caused by sleeping on one’s back
Or maybe it is caused by living off the backs of others
Or maybe wankers can’t think of anything useful to do
Being married to Jacqui “Five Bellies” Smith is also a cause!
He’s had some good stuff on the Eurozone recently though. Newsnight were just getting into the possible Euro collapse. The Euro politicians all insisting everything is fine and the markets insisting it isn’t. “Crisis? …what crisis?”Then it just sort of petered out and they went on about flu.
Mason had a good point about how ‘just because Euro politicians can’t possibly conceive of such a calamity doesn’t mean it can’t happen. No one could conceive of a world war in the 20th century but it happened twice.’
When politicians try and challenge the markets who usually wins?
Arnie Graf, the US community organiser who mentored the young Barack Obama, has been appointed by Ed Miliband to conduct a “year zero” review of Labour’s organisation and campaign structures.
Graf, currently director of the Chicago-based Industrial Areas Foundation (IAF), created by Saul Alinksy, is scheduled to arrive in February to conduct a “preliminary study” into the party’s operations and infrastructure.
It is understood Graf asked for, and received, commitments from Ed Miliband that his review would be conducted with the full authority of the leader’s office, rather than under the auspices of an external consultant.
Graf’s appointment is said to have been brokered by Lord (Maurice) Glassman, founder of the London Citizens network, who is now firmly established as a key adviser to the Labour leader.
According to Labour sources, Graf’s arrival coincides with a decision by Ed Miliband to distance himself from Movement for Change, the community organising model nurtured by his brother during the leadership campaign. According to an insider, “Movement for Change are David’s baby. Ed wants the party to go in a different direction.”
The IAF’s “modern organisational model” is based around micro-level community activism, with particular emphasis on intensive one-to-one training and mentoring. It was during one of these sessions that Graf and the 24-year-old Obama met, and bonded. Obama told Graf he was planning to become a lawyer. Graf urged him to stay political. Everyone knows what happened next.
Graf is believed to advocate an aggressive edge to community engagement. “You’ve got to get into the hard work of justice,” he is quoted as saying, “and you don’t get justice without disruption.”
How that agenda will play with existing party officers is a matter of conjecture. Ed Miliband insiders still regard many Victoria Street officials with suspicion, describing them as “part of the old establishment”. In turn, a number of senior Labour Party workers are unimpressed by what they see as the poor organisation and leadership that have characterised Ed Miliband’s first 100 days in post, along with what one calls the “faddism” of his team’s attachment to community organising.
According to a party insider, “Graf is coming over with a very wide-ranging brief. Ed was initially minded to test the water with a few different organisational pilots, but Graf was adamant. If he wasn’t coming with the full backing of the leader he wasn’t coming.”
My botty hurts.
Everyone loves you. Why is that?
Because I’m perfect .
E x .
I wonder how many years he would get if he was called Archer?
I need a job that pays money.
If you have a vacancy ring me at ewanme@live.co.uk
Ta.
I, and many others, know that you are deadly serious. You have, in the distant past, provided us with a modicum of humour. It would be a shame to see you starve and I hope you find your Knight In Shining Armour before it’s too late.
Best wishes.
Good luck in your search for gainful employment, Ewanme.
Dear Ewanme.
The Pope has just emailed me and he sends his blessings. He loved your tomato juice/time of the month joke and says you can convert at any time that is convenient to you!
May my God go with you.
Hugs, DT.
LOL , Damien !!
E x .
Dear Miss Botha,
Your free and easy use of the English language sets my teeth on edge. Furthermore, I find you’re punctuation and sentence construction is lamentable and thoroughly depressing.
I didn’t fight the war to have people like you murdering my language. I suspect you will still be under-employed on this very date in The Year of Our Lord 2012.
Good riddance.
P.S. Are you qualified to service a ride-on lawnmower?
‘you’re punctuation’ is most ironic.
Ha ha, mate. If you get any takers, I’ll plug my forehead into the mains, EB. Safe bet gal, but please prove me wrong. You used to be so nutty and fancy-free, my friend. What happened? Why the long face, son?
This life is a shit and then you die. You were born to debunk the poseurs and tossers so get out there and effingdo it .
Whose labia were going to be preserved in olive oil and sold down the market as sun-dried tomatoes?
That would be Brenda Lacluster’s lips. Look, Ewanme. If you are desperate, come to Spain and I’ll pay you ten euros a day to type my comments.
Mum is a big fan of yours and she is willing to chip in another ten to have you remove the sand from her creases.
Spot on. Nail on head.
Cheers , honey
(
E x .
Play this new entry at max volume and put the kettle on pop-pickers.
Did we win the silly game yet, Billy?
I’ve tried to ring your e-mail but there’s no reply.
Please advise.
OT but does anyone know if it possible to check with House of Lords who has signed in to collect their 300 quids per day on any given day or do they keep that info secret.
‘Socialism is only workable in Heaven, where it is not needed, but not in Hell, where they have it already’.
Harold MacMillan.
It’s a pity that someone would associate Marxism with morality in any possible way.
It’s a disgustingly immoral form of state slavery.
I like a golden shower.
Now you’re just taking the piss.
On one hand I hope that he gets serious jail time for fucking-over the tax payer for personal profit.
But on the other hand I think others should have been put in the dock before they got to him, namely, everyone who’s been in the labour cabinet since 1997.
If Chaytor goes to jail for a year or so for stealing £13,000 of tax payers’ money, then how much jail time should we be giving to Gordon Brown and his complicit chums for burning about £5fuckingtrillion of tax payers’ money and then living off the tax payer with massive pensions afterwards?
We need perspective here; yes, jail Chaytor, but we also need to put Brown and co in the dock for sustained and monumentally huge economic terrorism.
Jail time for nicking £13k, but not for deliberately bankrupting the whole fucking country and then leeching off the tax payer afterwards? Doesn’t sound right to me.
I thought Misappropriation of Taxpayers Funds was illegal. Anyone know if it is?
yellow now are the fifth largest party in Wales
yellow now are the fifth largest party in Scotland
yellow are on course to be the fourth largest party in England…
As Cammo moves to the centre… UKIP are set to be the new third party.
Centre? He is full on left.
If they pull their fucking fingers out. Come on Farage, get a fuggin’ grip!
England has been chosen to host the next Ashes Series.
Agreed Guido – accept for the last point.
I know these implied references to prison rape are very common – in the United States they have long been even in children’s shows (such as “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”).
However, they are not funny.
Prison rape used to be unknown – at least in Britain. And I see no reason why being raped should just be accepted as a normal part of the punishment of going to prison.
If a court ordered someone raped there would be outrage – so why do we all nudge and wink over unordered prison rape?
It is not acceptable.
Come on. An eye for an eye. He shafted we taxpayers so it stands to reason he should be shafted in return.
Good the less lefty marxist twats we have on the government/co-ill ition benches the better ! 1 more Labour MP ain’t gunna make much difference to the marxist twaddle we’ve got pumping out at the moment but it will boost the Pro British Conservatives side ! And the Lefty Marxist twats on the opposition benches will oppose everything anyway because they have to – or they will show themselves to be lefty marxist twats just like the government !
Win Win – I call it !
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1344724/Ed-Miliband-rounded-Radio-2-listeners-attempts-revive-flagging-leadership.html
Hopefully chaytor will get a fair and proper sentence today as he deserves.
Meanwhile I see edmilitwit got a proper mauling on r2 yesterday. According to him he’s ‘on a journey’. That’ll be downhill with a blank sheet of paper then.
To obscurity – and beyond !!
Right. So, the story is in The Mail which makes it (to some) instantly dismissable – and there’s actually more to it than the headline would suggest, but it still made me chuckle…
“Statistics released yesterday show that Cathy Ashton, who is EU foreign minister, has a poorer attendance record than any of her colleagues.”
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1344657/Baroness-Ashton-missed-European-Commission-meetings.html
Tat did not dare show his face for once last night! He was owned here yesterday by concrete pump and CRMM.
Taking on either is asking for it. Taking both on together is death wish time.
Not me, you tit…….!
Nor me, tosser. Morning cp.
Hold on a minute! You admit to being TaT from what Waltaute said. Thank you for that confirmation which we have always suspected.
I suppose that you had to be there.
I have news for you GUIDO!
The unelected coalition and their unelected “without a mandate” comedy duo has already dropped THE SOAP!
Cosy little deals behind closed doors allowing MP’s to pay back a their looted/stolen/misappropriated expenses out of sight of an offended population is hardy going to wash the crap off the stinking corpse that is British politics.
Happily appointing expenses abusers in your cabinet “Spelman”and, hoping to recruit more of the same “Laws” is a disgrace and a public outrage and no amount of “soft soap” will change that!
May 6th 2010,we had a regime I think voted in ,the problem is that,the regime is the same as the old one voted just different faces out,so change=no change,,the only reason was to get that corrupt piece of gold selling shite out,now I think soon the Libshites will throw their toys out of the pram just to stop having a meeting in a taxi
There was a new thread around a minute ago……
Has anyone seen it…?
The index page has been rather unpredictable these last 48 hours. Hope Mr Cole is sober whilst at the helm … (Morning sir, just joking.)
Where are we with all the other Labour MPs on charges? Files seem to keep being sent to the CPS and thats the last we hear of them.
Probably holed up at their Tuscan villas.
The old ones are the best.
In another two decades you’ll be a 40-year-old virgin living with his mum, says the real Tessa Tickles to the above.
We should be more sensitive to the people who are only trying to create wealth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OK. Then he will get 3-4 years. Is that sympathetic enough?
Not nearly long enough in IMO.
What a lovely day to lock someone up! Now let me see …
All well and good, but the squealing from MPs now concerning reinstatement of their expenses should tell you it’s just a matter of time before they all get back on the gravy train.
Only this time they’ll stop any chance of it getting out.
All that complaining about the ‘system’ being broken and it transpires they’re just common criminals after all.
All they have to do is change the Rules again, making it impossible to hold anyone to account over this. The only question is how long it will take them to do it.
Simples.
Yep, they’ll slip something about ‘security’ or terrorism that means their expense documents will be locked away for 20 years.
I hate them all.
Vote UKIP. They might be as crooked as the current bunch, but the message has to get across to the thieves that enough is enough.
New thread now up.
yes but how do you get to it moniker…it was there when I first went in but now still on thursdays
“One more sleep”? Are you a fucking teenage girl, counting down the days until she goes on holiday. For Christ’s sake when did this become common usage?
Sort it out.
Investor unease about Portugal grows
Decision due at 1415…
http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Politics/David-Chaytor-Ex-Labour-MP-For-Bury-North-To-Be-Sentenced-After-Pleading-Guilty-Over-Expenses/Article/201101115886268?lpos=Politics_Carousel_Region_2&lid=ARTICLE_15886268_David_Chaytor%2C_Ex_Labour_MP_For_Bury_North%2C_To_Be_Sentenced_After_Pleading_Guilty_Over_Expenses
‘submitted fraudulent documents’
not just fraud but a betrayal of public trust’ makes it considerably more heinous. I will be disappointed if the sentence is less than 5 years given that time served will be much less ine current state of our justice system.
He won’t get sent down. He’s a blick part of the establishment.
The blicks already have their quota in gaol.